# So I had this dream last night...



## Rel (Feb 21, 2005)

...that I was playing D&D in a game being run by...Anna-Nicole Smith.  It was at a Game Day and she was a pretty bad GM.  The encounter was fine I suppose (we were fighting some demons and dragon creatures in a big room with lots of tables).  But she had really poor control over the group and trouble handling the initiative order.  She was not dressed in a sexy or provocative way and she seemed about as smart otherwise as you'd think she would seem.

What does this mean?

Am I dying?


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## Ferox4 (Feb 21, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> ...that I was playing D&D in a game being run by...Anna-Nicole Smith.  It was at a Game Day and she was a pretty bad GM.  The encounter was fine I suppose (we were fighting some demons and dragon creatures in a big room with lots of tables).  But she had really poor control over the group and trouble handling the initiative order.  She was not dressed in a sexy or provocative way and she seemed about as smart otherwise as you'd think she would seem.
> 
> What does this mean?
> 
> Am I dying?




LOL - Initiative can be tricky sometimes......


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## MrFilthyIke (Feb 21, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Am I dying?




No, just mixing D&D with your average gamers other obsession.

(Boobies)


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## Algolei (Feb 21, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> What does this mean?
> 
> Am I dying?



Yes.

Anna Nicole Smith was your DM, wasn't dressed provocatively, and you were concerned with her knowledge of the game.

It means you're getting old, Rel.  Clearly sex has become less important to you than good D&D.  But don't worry!  Just post your email address somewhere public and a dozen companies will try to sell you Viagra.  You can once again become the man you never were with Anna Nicole Smith!

Just like me.


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## fusangite (Feb 21, 2005)

That was fabulous. I laughed until I stopped.


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## francisca (Feb 21, 2005)

Stay away from the brown acid, man......


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## Narfellus (Feb 21, 2005)

You aren't dying until you dream about Brittany Spears running Cthulhu...


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## Evilhalfling (Feb 21, 2005)

The wacky Dream I had last night was so full of religious symbolism it might get removed  
I was on a tropical Island and looking at an enormous burned out wooden church.  The people around me were saying it was never that well built to begin with and that the architect was more enthusastic than skillful.  I went climbing around on the second floor, in the dark corners where people didn't go, and found that some of the building was rotting and unsafe.  
do you think this has any bases in my personal views of religion?  


Im pretty sure the flattulent King Kong who showed up next, was unconnected to the previous bits. although the fact that a naturalist was chasing him, and I was chasing the naturalist in a helicopter only has relevance for the fact it was the second time I dreamed of flying above tropical islands, well since I went to Hawaii in October.


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## MrFilthyIke (Feb 21, 2005)

Algolei said:
			
		

> Anna Nicole Smith was your DM, wasn't dressed provocatively, and you were concerned with her knowledge of the game.




This is begging for a photoshop job of ANS in a renaissance outfit with dice a table of dorks.


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## nakia (Feb 21, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Am I dying?




You're not dying.  You just can't think of anything good to do.  Now get over here and pick me up!

(Sorry, I just couldn't resist.  50 cool points to anyone who can name that movie).

And Rel, obviously you have some unresolved issues regarding the place of gaming within your life.  You feel as if you must choose between sex and gaming, or perhaps just women and gaming in general.  This dream represents some attempt at resolution between the two, albeit an unsatisfactory one.  By blending the two you got an unsatisfactory game and little gratification of any kind.

Now tell me about your mother. 

That will be $150.  You can pay the receptionist on the way out.


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## Old One (Feb 21, 2005)

nakia said:
			
		

> You're not dying.  You just can't think of anything good to do.  Now get over here and pick me up!
> 
> (Sorry, I just couldn't resist.  50 cool points to anyone who can name that movie).




Ferris Buehler, you're my hero...

~ OO

EDIT: PS - Rel, we seriously need to talk...that's just wrong !


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## Narfellus (Feb 21, 2005)

Ye ask, ye shall receive (I didn't do the Renaissance garb, it would take too long).


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## nakia (Feb 21, 2005)

Old One said:
			
		

> Ferris Buehler, you're my hero...




Points to you, Old One!


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## Rel (Feb 21, 2005)

Narfellus said:
			
		

> Ye ask, ye shall receive (I didn't do the Renaissance garb, it would take too long).




I've recovered from laughing now.  The REALLY funny part is that I'm IN that second picture!  I'm the guy sitting at the end of the far side of the table, looking toward Henry and Anna-Nicole.

I'm pretty sure I TOOK the first picture!

Man, you'd think I'd have a better memory of her actually being there, huh?

As to the charges that I'm getting too old, they're probably correct.  As to the charges that I'm losing interest in sex, I think my wife would tend to disagree, particularly if you'd asked her this morning.

Maybe that's it.  With my sexual (



Spoiler



and boobie


) needs so completely fulfilled from the night before then there was little need to involve Anna-Nicole in any sexual activity when she showed up in my dream.  Instead we just did some mediocre gaming.

Though I didn't think it possible, my brain is definately getting weirder as it ages.


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## Ranger REG (Feb 21, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> ...that I was playing D&D in a game being run by...Anna-Nicole Smith.  It was at a Game Day and she was a pretty bad GM.  The encounter was fine I suppose (we were fighting some demons and dragon creatures in a big room with lots of tables).  But she had really poor control over the group and trouble handling the initiative order.  She was not dressed in a sexy or provocative way and she seemed about as smart otherwise as you'd think she would seem.
> 
> What does this mean?
> 
> Am I dying?



You know this is something you can clearly ... nay, blatantly ... file this under the "Too Much Information" cabinet.

You're not dying, you just like dumb blonde bombshells. That's all I have to say.   

You're only dying if you dream of spooning Larry King.


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## Rel (Feb 21, 2005)

Ranger REG said:
			
		

> You're only dying if you dream of spooning Larry King.




Ah, now I've lost all interest in sex.  Who knew it could be so simple?


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## ph34r (Feb 21, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> ...and trouble handling the initiative order.




Was it a 2nd Ed game?


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## Ranger REG (Feb 22, 2005)

ph34r said:
			
		

> Was it a 2nd Ed game?



Was *Diaglo* there?


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## Ashwyn (Feb 22, 2005)

Ranger REG said:
			
		

> Was *Diaglo* there?



Are we playing questions?


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## Naathez (Feb 22, 2005)

Where did you find a CLOTHED picture of A.N. Smith?


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## MrFilthyIke (Feb 22, 2005)

Naathez said:
			
		

> Where did you find a CLOTHED picture of A.N. Smith?




He found it with a lot of effort.


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## nakia (Feb 22, 2005)

Ashwyn said:
			
		

> Are we playing questions?




Could we?


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## Henry (Feb 22, 2005)

Hey, I used to dream of gaming with Paula Abdul, so either everything's OK or this sickness goes deeper than anyone can imagine. 

More seriously, this may sound strange, but you may be coming down with an illness soon. I know that many people I know, myself included, have really wacked-out dreams either just before or during an illness.

Once when I had the flu, I dreamed of the music video of a Ce Ce Peniston song, "Finally" in a continuous loop. When I got well, I have not voluntarily listened to that song ever again, and if I'm ever captured as a P.O.W. all they have to do to break me is just put that song on a continuous loop.


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## Ashwyn (Feb 22, 2005)

nakia said:
			
		

> Could we?



Do you think we should?


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## Ashwyn (Feb 22, 2005)

Henry said:
			
		

> Hey, I used to dream of gaming with Paula Abdul, so either everything's OK or this sickness goes deeper than anyone can imagine.
> 
> More seriously, this may sound strange, but you may be coming down with an illness soon. I know that many people I know, myself included, have really wacked-out dreams either just before or during an illness.



I must have a brain disease*, because my dreams are always weird. In fact, from what I understand, it's very unusual to remember your dreams all the time.



			
				Henry said:
			
		

> Once when I had the flu, I dreamed of the music video of a Ce Ce Peniston song, "Finally" in a continuous loop. When I got well, I have not voluntarily listened to that song ever again, and if I'm ever captured as a P.O.W. all they have to do to break me is just put that song on a continuous loop.



_scribbles some notes_


*Many would attest that I do.


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## Narfellus (Feb 22, 2005)

MrFilthyIke said:
			
		

> He found it with a lot of effort.




Ain't that the truth. Better yet though, i was amazed to find one that actually looked like she was blissfully tossing a d20! 

Rel, i'm pleased that i reminded you that Anna was at your GameDay. I don't recall seeing her last time i was there, but maybe that's because Larry King was hogging all the attention.





He really has the tendency to chastise other players. They look upset, don't they?


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## Henry (Feb 22, 2005)

Narfellus said:
			
		

> He really has the tendency to chastise other players. They look upset, don't they?




That's nothing. When this guy showed up, and DM'ed the Against the Giants module, all he wanted to talk about was sex and violence! 

I did like the segment on *"Get your hands off my Nosnra: Cheating Chieftains and the women who love them!"*


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## Narfellus (Feb 22, 2005)

Oh Lord. Ok. This thread is too funny. Who knew Jerry was a gamer????


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## MrFilthyIke (Feb 22, 2005)

Narfellus said:
			
		

> Oh Lord. Ok. This thread is too funny. Who knew Jerry was a gamer????




We need an archive with these photos for later enjoyment


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## Angcuru (Feb 22, 2005)

nakia said:
			
		

> Now tell me about your mother.
> 
> That will be $150.  You can pay the receptionist on the way out.



Hey, that's my job!   Eventually...


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## eris404 (Feb 22, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> ...that I was playing D&D in a game being run by...Anna-Nicole Smith.  It was at a Game Day and she was a pretty bad GM.  The encounter was fine I suppose (we were fighting some demons and dragon creatures in a big room with lots of tables).  But she had really poor control over the group and trouble handling the initiative order.  She was not dressed in a sexy or provocative way and she seemed about as smart otherwise as you'd think she would seem.
> 
> What does this mean?
> 
> Am I dying?




Ummmm....who is your DM, Rel? Or (shudder) are YOU the DM in your group?


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## Narfellus (Feb 22, 2005)

Apparently, Vin didn't take kindly to being called a "Munchkin Pansy."


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## Rel (Feb 22, 2005)

eris404 said:
			
		

> Ummmm....who is your DM, Rel? Or (shudder) are YOU the DM in your group?




We alternate DM's.  I'm occupying the chair at the moment.

That is whenever Anna-Nicole is busy being famous for being famous.


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## Ranger REG (Feb 22, 2005)

Ashwyn said:
			
		

> Do you think we should?



Would it kill us to try?


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## Rel (Feb 22, 2005)

Ranger REG said:
			
		

> Would it kill us to try?




Why are we even having this conversation?


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## Cyberzombie (Feb 22, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Why are we even having this conversation?



 Are you hitting on me again?


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## Rel (Feb 22, 2005)

Cyberzombie said:
			
		

> Are you hitting on me again?




Anna-Nicole, is that you?


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## Cyberzombie (Feb 22, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Anna-Nicole, is that you?



 Do you want me to be?


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## Rel (Feb 22, 2005)

Cyberzombie said:
			
		

> Do you want me to be?




Well have you gotten a better handle on the initiative order situation?


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## Cyberzombie (Feb 22, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Well have you gotten a better handle on the initiative order situation?



 Do you really want me to make a comment about "handling" your initiative with Eric's Grandmother watching?


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## Rel (Feb 23, 2005)

Cyberzombie said:
			
		

> Do you really want me to make a comment about "handling" your initiative with Eric's Grandmother watching?




If she's going to watch, shouldn't she have to pay $50?


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## Ashwyn (Feb 23, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> If she's going to watch, shouldn't she have to pay $50?



Did I derail this thread?


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## Ranger REG (Feb 23, 2005)

Would you share?


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## Narfellus (Feb 23, 2005)

yep. Thread derailed.


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## MrFilthyIke (Feb 23, 2005)

A great quote from someone that read this thread.



> boobs are great for a few minutes but a good game - those stories can bore your friends for years.


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## nakia (Feb 23, 2005)

Ashwyn said:
			
		

> Did I derail this thread?




How about we just start another thread?


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## Rel (Feb 23, 2005)

nakia said:
			
		

> How about we just start another thread?




Why bother?


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## nakia (Feb 23, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Why bother?




You don't mind if we hijack your thread?


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## Rel (Feb 23, 2005)

nakia said:
			
		

> You don't mind if we hijack your thread?




Does this thread seem like the kind of thing that I'd take very seriously?


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## nakia (Feb 23, 2005)

Anna Nicole isn't that important to you?


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## MrFilthyIke (Feb 23, 2005)

nakia said:
			
		

> Anna Nicole isn't that important to you?




Say it aint' so?!


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## nakia (Feb 23, 2005)

MrFilthyIke said:
			
		

> Say it aint' so?!




Is that really a question?


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## Rel (Feb 23, 2005)

Did he not add a question mark at the end?


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## Pielorinho (Feb 23, 2005)

I'm gonna interrupt the questions game to share my dream about gaming the other night.  I was being held prisoner by a terrorist near my workplace, but he fell asleep, and his guard (a big beefy bald black man) eventually gave up pointing the gun at me.  As I hurried away into my workplace, to take the elevator to safety, he approached me and took out his business card.  Turned out he wanted my help financing his new computer game, a game about fishing for tuna.  "Perhaps it is boring," he said.  "But the world needs philosophy."

I didn't have time to figure out what he meant, because soon thereafter I was being chased by rabid squirrels.

Daniel


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## MrFilthyIke (Feb 23, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Did he not add a question mark at the end?




Did I?


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## MrFilthyIke (Feb 23, 2005)

Pielorinho said:
			
		

> I didn't have time to figure out what he meant, because soon thereafter I was being chased by rabid squirrels.




There is a 12 step program for you Pielorinho.


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## Rel (Feb 23, 2005)

Pielorinho said:
			
		

> I'm gonna interrupt the questions game to share my dream about gaming the other night.  I was being held prisoner by a terrorist near my workplace, but he fell asleep, and his guard (a big beefy bald black man) eventually gave up pointing the gun at me.  As I hurried away into my workplace, to take the elevator to safety, he approached me and took out his business card.  Turned out he wanted my help financing his new computer game, a game about fishing for tuna.  "Perhaps it is boring," he said.  "But the world needs philosophy."
> 
> I didn't have time to figure out what he meant, because soon thereafter I was being chased by rabid squirrels.
> 
> Daniel




Was this game going to be converted into a table top RPG too?


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## Pielorinho (Feb 23, 2005)

MrFilthyIke said:
			
		

> There is a 12 step program for you Pielorinho.




Heh.  I'd just done a humane-society presentation for a girl-scout troop that evening (I almost wrote, "I'd just done a girl scout troop that evening," but that's not at all what I mean), and part of the presentation was talking about rabies.  I shouldn't scare little children right before bedtime; karma will chase me down in the form of a nightmare squirrel.

Daniel


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## Mark (Feb 23, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> *So I had this dream last night... *
> 
> ...that I was playing D&D in a game being run by...Anna-Nicole Smith.  It was at a Game Day and she was a pretty bad GM.  The encounter was fine I suppose (we were fighting some demons and dragon creatures in a big room with lots of tables).  But she had really poor control over the group and trouble handling the initiative order.  She was not dressed in a sexy or provocative way and she seemed about as smart otherwise as you'd think she would seem.
> 
> ...




Dying?  Naw.  You certainly are fighting some demons, of some kind, I would guess.  Have you recently changed your "formula"?  I mean, as far as "promised lands" go, this I-had-a-dream speech has certainly fallen a little short of at least one I remember from the past.

Was there irony in the dream? (Was she using "minis"?)


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## nakia (Feb 23, 2005)

Pielorinho said:
			
		

> "Perhaps it is boring," he said.  "But the world needs philosophy."
> 
> Daniel




Can I use this in my sig?


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## Rel (Feb 23, 2005)

Mark said:
			
		

> Was there irony in the dream? (Was she using "minis"?)




As I recall she was using counters.  In fact one problem seemed to be that when she would move stuff around on the battlemat these flat counters would get knocked around and then she would spend a couple minutes getting everything arranged back in place until somebody would interrupt her and say, "wasn't that demon actually at the other table there instead of next to that dragon critter?"  Wait a second...

Holy crap!  I just figured out what was going on!  The other players were intentionally disrupting the battlemat and questioning her placement of the counters so that she would spend more time having to rearrange them!  Time that she had to spend *leaning forward over the table!*  I was sitting at a a seat right next to her so I had a bad angle on the cleavage!

So the generic Game Day participants in my dream screwed me out of a good gaming experience AND a good view of Anna-Nicole's cleavage!  Sons of bit...I'll be back later.  I gotta go over to the new NC Game Day thread...


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## Pielorinho (Feb 23, 2005)

nakia said:
			
		

> Can I use this in my sig?




Absolutely!

And Rel, I apologize for that:  when you kept saying, "All right, give me some great cleavage!" I thought you were talking to the fighter.

Daniel


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## Clueless (Feb 23, 2005)

Lol


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## Rel (Feb 23, 2005)

Pielorinho said:
			
		

> And Rel, I apologize for that:  when you kept saying, "All right, give me some great cleavage!" I thought you were talking to the fighter.
> 
> Daniel




Honestly, Daniel, I thought you were above this sort of thing.  I guess your notions of modern feminism don't extend south to Anna-Nicole's chesticles.


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## Pielorinho (Feb 23, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Honestly, Daniel, I thought you were above this sort of thing. I guess your notions of modern feminism don't extend south to Anna-Nicole's chesticles.




I put on a pretty good show, but in this case, I got busted.

Daniel


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## Desdichado (Feb 23, 2005)

As long as we're talking weirdo gaming related dreams, there's a game store I frequent that's only a small detour for me to reach on the way home from work.  However, that detour takes me past a bar called "Henry the VIII: Topless Go-Go Dancers."  And, I swear, the sign in front of the bar has what looks like a line-drawn copy of our own August Moderator's former avatar.

I had a dream not long ago where I was inside that bar, which was dark, dingy, and full of smoke, topless girls and badly dressed pimps all with cigars, shots of whiskey, character sheets and dice.  In fact, it looked a lot like the bar-scene in the "Love is a Battlefield" video, if anyone remembers that (I do, because it's one of the DVD extras on _13 Going on 30_ which I watched with my wife recently -- probably the cause of the resemblance) and I think that song may even have been playing in the background, and everyone's playing D&D.

Henry, the Moderator, was walking around with a really big cigar followed by several topless girls, just like some kind of mob boss.  Of course, I don't actually know what Henry looks like, but in my dream he looked like Henry VIII (see attachment.)

I can't remember exactly what I was doing there, but I think I was going from table to table trying to find my game, but I kept getting distracted by various other things going on in the bar.

It was very surreal.  As dreams often are, I suppose.  But now, whenever I see a post from Henry, I picture him as a pimp-king of a strip bar in suburban Detroit with hose, big puffy doublets and a stupid cap, surrounded by topless girls covered with glitter.  It's not a pretty picture.


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## Pielorinho (Feb 23, 2005)

Joshua, I can tell you, I've met Henry, and you've just described him *perfectly*--right down to the glitter!  That's amazing!

Daniel


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## Narfellus (Feb 23, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Holy crap!  I just figured out what was going on!  The other players were intentionally disrupting the battlemat and questioning her placement of the counters so that she would spend more time having to rearrange them!  Time that she had to spend *leaning forward over the table!*  I was sitting at a a seat right next to her so I had a bad angle on the cleavage!




That is so funny. Who would've thought gamers were such pervs too???


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## Rel (Feb 23, 2005)

Joshua Dyal said:
			
		

> Of course, I don't actually know what Henry looks like, but in my dream he looked like Henry VIII




If you want to know what Henry really looks like then check out the first pair of pics that Narfellus doctored upthread.  In the second pic, the guy who is standing up at the head of the table (next to Anna-Nicole) is Henry.  He's running an Arcana Unearthed game at NCGDIV if I'm not mistaken.

It's hard to see the glitter given the distance the picture is being taken from and the Talley Student Center is a no-smoking facility so he had to leave the big cigar in his backpack.


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## Narfellus (Feb 23, 2005)

I figured JD's contribution of Henry deserved another mock-up.


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## Narfellus (Feb 23, 2005)

And something I always suspected...YES...The Devil DOES influence rpg's! Mom was right...


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## Desdichado (Feb 23, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> If you want to know what Henry really looks like then check out the first pair of pics that Narfellus doctored upthread.  In the second pic, the guy who is standing up at the head of the table (next to Anna-Nicole) is Henry.  He's running an Arcana Unearthed game at NCGDIV if I'm not mistaken.



Wow, change the outfit, and he actually would make a passable standin for the King o' Many Wives!


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## Desdichado (Feb 23, 2005)

Narfellus said:
			
		

> I figured JD's contribution of Henry deserved another mock-up.



  Wow, those gamers in the bottom left really do look like they're watching a stripshow too.  That's uncanny.


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## Henry (Feb 23, 2005)

Joshua Dyal said:
			
		

> Wow, change the outfit, and he actually would make a passable standin for the King o' Many Wives!




Heh, why do you think I picked the avatar?


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## Rel (Feb 23, 2005)

Narfellus said:
			
		

> And something I always suspected...YES...The Devil DOES influence rpg's! Mom was right...




Interesting...

I'm a Quasit in the first pic and a Balor in the second.  Kinda makes you wonder what they're serving at the Rock-Ola Cafe, huh?


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## MrFilthyIke (Feb 23, 2005)

Henry said:
			
		

> Heh, why do you think I picked the avatar?




Henry's one phat pimp

What's your ride?


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## Henry (Feb 23, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Interesting...
> 
> I'm a Quasit in the first pic and a Balor in the second.  Kinda makes you wonder what they're serving at the Rock-Ola Cafe, huh?




Demonic Milk, apparently.

_"It does a Quasit good!"_


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## DaveStebbins (Feb 24, 2005)

Pielorinho said:
			
		

> Heh.  I'd just done a humane-society presentation for a girl-scout troop that evening (I almost wrote, "I'd just done a girl scout troop that evening," but that's not at all what I mean)



Yeah, the guy in the cubicle next to me left the office with this phrase today, "Well, I have to go pick up a cheerleader!"

Of course he meant his daughter, but that's not how it sounded...


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## Desdichado (Feb 24, 2005)

I was hoping I could find a website with a picture of the Henry VIII sign, but the closest I found was this story from the Detroit Free Press where the owner is complaining about a new county ordinance that would outlaw lap dances.   http://www.detnews.com/2003/metro/0301/16/a01-61747.htm

Apparently he's also under trial for using his strip bars as a front for prostitution, drug dealing and other shenanigans.  Wow, next time we have the Detroit gameday at Pandemonium, we have to pop down and see what Henry's been up to!  

As a totally threadjack aside, apparently he's also the owner of Bogard's, another strip club that I pass on my daily commute (yes, I _do_ live in Detroit.  Why do you ask?) which had a sign that said "Lovely Ladies" on it.  Of course, the sign's broken now, and says "Lovely Lad."  Somehow that just seems really wrong; I have this strange image of a thin, pretty-boy 19-yo androgynous kid doing a Chippendale's number, and frankly, I'd rather imagine Henry the codpiece-wearing pimp.


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## Henry (Feb 24, 2005)

Y'know, if it didn't give the TOTALLY wrong impression, I'd be tempted to put "codpiece-wearing pimp" as my Avatar Title...


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## diaglo (Feb 24, 2005)

Rel,

i don't think you are getting ready to push up daisies.

but i think you'd better check your bank account. older men and money are what she's after.


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## Rel (Feb 24, 2005)

diaglo said:
			
		

> but i think you'd better check your bank account. older men and money are what she's after.




Well then my wife has nothing to worry about.  Except our bank balance.


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## Torm (Feb 24, 2005)

Henry said:
			
		

> Y'know, if it didn't give the TOTALLY wrong impression, I'd be tempted to put "codpiece-wearing pimp" as my Avatar Title...



On behalf of those of us who have met you in person and know you, Henry, I officially object to the use of the word "TOTALLY" in the above sentence.


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## Rel (Feb 24, 2005)

Torm said:
			
		

> On behalf of those of us who have met you in person and know you, Henry, I officially object to the use of the word "TOTALLY" in the above sentence.




Are you hitting on Henry?


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## Desdichado (Feb 24, 2005)

Wow, it does kinda sound like he is!  But, hey, man, that's OK.  We're very accepting of all kinds here.

Although that goes a long way towards explaining the generally blasé attitude about gaming with Anna Nichole Smith, I guess.


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## Torm (Feb 24, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Are you hitting on Henry?



Nah. If I were going to hit on someone, it would be Clueless, or Cyberzombie, or someone else that begins with a 'C'. See?  

Although, Henry does have a sweet, sweet bum.  

My cousin Vickie Lynn says hello, btw. (It pains me to admit to that.)


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## Rel (Feb 24, 2005)

Torm said:
			
		

> Nah. If I were going to hit on someone, it would be Clueless, or Cyberzombie, or someone else that begins with a 'C'. See?




From what I know about them and about you, I'd recommend the former rather than the latter, avatar notwithstanding.


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## Torm (Feb 24, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> From what I know about them and about you, I'd recommend the former rather than the latter, avatar notwithstanding.



Yeah, me, too - but that avatar is pretty hot, just all on its own.


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## Rel (Feb 24, 2005)

Torm said:
			
		

> Yeah, me, too - but that avatar is pretty hot, just all on its own.




Go take a nap.  Maybe you'll dream about being GMed by Lucy Liu and then you can post a thread about it.


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## Torm (Feb 24, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Go take a nap.  Maybe you'll dream about being GMed by Lucy Liu and then you can post a thread about it.



"GMed." Is that what the kids are calling it these days? I don't think Eric's Grandma would appreciate a post about that.


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## Torm (Feb 24, 2005)

P.S. Vickie Lynn equals Anna Nicole. One of the most disturbing moments in my life was going over to a friend's house and seeing her issue on his table. 

That goes a long way toward explaining MY blase attitude towards gaming with her.


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## Narfellus (Feb 24, 2005)

Who's Vicki Lynn?


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## Rel (Feb 24, 2005)

Torm said:
			
		

> P.S. Vickie Lynn equals Anna Nicole. One of the most disturbing moments in my life was going over to a friend's house and seeing her issue on his table.
> 
> That goes a long way toward explaining MY blase attitude towards gaming with her.




I got the reference.  That's what I get for watching one too many brain-melting episodes of True Hollywood Stories.  Are you serious about her being your cousin?

If so then bring her to the Game Day next time you can come.  Then my dreams can become reality when I actually get to play in a mediocre game run by Anna-Nicole/Vickie Lynn!


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## Torm (Feb 24, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Are you serious about her being your cousin?



I _am_ unfortunately serious, but I only know about my thankfully distant relationship (4th or 5th cousin) with her from a few family reunions when I was younger. Even if I thought she'd take me up on it, I wouldn't invite her to game with my personal gaming group, much less to a Game Day where I might be meeting people I want to make at least a not bad impression on.


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## Desdichado (Feb 24, 2005)

Torm said:
			
		

> One of the most disturbing moments in my life was going over to a friend's house and seeing her issue on his table.



Better than seeing his issue on the table, IYKWIMAITYD...


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## Rel (Feb 24, 2005)

Joshua Dyal said:
			
		

> Better than seeing his issue on the table, IYKWIMAITYD...




Ewwwwww.  That is BAD for the finish!


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## nakia (Feb 25, 2005)

All this talk of Henry wearing a codpiece and issues on tables makes me wonder:

For my sanity, couldn't we just go back to askng questions again?


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## Rel (Feb 25, 2005)

nakia said:
			
		

> For my sanity, couldn't we just go back to askng questions again?




Would it really cleanse the taint from your brain?


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## Ashwyn (Feb 25, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Would it really cleanse the taint from your brain?



Why did you have to use the word "taint"?


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## nakia (Feb 25, 2005)

Ashwyn said:
			
		

> Why did you have to use the word "taint"?




Why did you have to invoke that image?


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## Rel (Feb 25, 2005)

Ashwyn said:
			
		

> Why did you have to use the word "taint"?




Would you have preferred "filth"?


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## Desdichado (Feb 25, 2005)

Will Torm report on his nocturnal escapades?  Is anyone entertained by them?


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## Ashwyn (Feb 25, 2005)

Why did you have to post while I was posting?


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## Henry (Feb 25, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Would you have preferred "filth"?




Would it make it any cleaner than "codpiece"?


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## nakia (Feb 25, 2005)

Henry said:
			
		

> Would it make it any cleaner than "codpiece"?




Didn't I restart the question game to get away from this very discussion?


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## Rel (Feb 25, 2005)

nakia said:
			
		

> Didn't I restart the question game to get away from this very discussion?




Should we ban Henry from the thread entirely?


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## nakia (Feb 25, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Should we ban Henry from the thread entirely?




Can Henry avoid mentioning his codpiece?


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## Ashwyn (Feb 25, 2005)

nakia said:
			
		

> Can Henry avoid mentioning his codpiece?



Can you?


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## Desdichado (Feb 25, 2005)

Can Henry's influence cause codpieces to come back into fashion?


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## Rel (Feb 25, 2005)

Joshua Dyal said:
			
		

> Can Henry's influence cause codpieces to come back into fashion?




Would you really want them to?


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## Pielorinho (Feb 25, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Would you really want them to?




If they come back into fashion, will I be dreaming about Henry's codpiece more or less?

Daniel


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## Henry (Feb 25, 2005)

How can you even ask that question?


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## Desdichado (Feb 25, 2005)

Henry said:
			
		

> How can you even ask that question?



Is it comfortable to wear?


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## Torm (Feb 25, 2005)

Joshua Dyal said:
			
		

> Will Torm report on his nocturnal escapades?  Is anyone entertained by them?



Wouldn't you expect Torm to be too much of a gentleman for that?  

Is there a penalty for the first person who stops asking questions and posts a statement? If so, what is it? Can anyone come up with a really good one? And can they tell us, without doing it in such a way that they are subject to it?


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## Torm (Feb 25, 2005)

Would it involve Henry's codpiece?


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## Henry (Feb 25, 2005)

Torm said:
			
		

> Is there a penalty for the first person who stops asking questions and posts a statement? If so, what is it? Can anyone come up with a really good one? And can they tell us, without doing it in such a way that they are subject to it?




Would you have expected the penalty to be anything more than the customary twenty lashes with a wet noodle? And where would you get said noodle?

And where are my girl scout cookies?


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## Torm (Feb 25, 2005)

Henry said:
			
		

> And where are my girl scout cookies?



Can I bring them and some pumpkin cookies on Sunday?


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## Desdichado (Feb 25, 2005)

Is there some punishment (corporeal?) for asking too many questions in one post?


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## Henry (Feb 25, 2005)

> Is there some punishment (corporeal?) for asking too many questions in one post?




Would you believe there isn't?

And is a corporeal punishment better or worse than an Incorporeal one?


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## Desdichado (Feb 25, 2005)

Don't you think it is?  Can I propose we revive the wet noodle beatings mentioned upthread?


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## Pielorinho (Feb 25, 2005)

Torm said:
			
		

> Is there a penalty for the first person who stops asking questions and posts a statement?




No.  I mean, yes!  I mean--


aaaaah!


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## Henry (Feb 25, 2005)

Do you have enough wet noodles?


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## Torm (Feb 25, 2005)

Henry said:
			
		

> Do you have enough wet noodles?



Is three-fitty enough to get some with?


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## Desdichado (Feb 25, 2005)

Can I "get some" with you for three fitty?

Why does thread continually thrust my mind into the gutter?


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## Torm (Feb 25, 2005)

Joshua Dyal said:
			
		

> Can I "get some" with you for three fitty?
> 
> Why does thread continually thrust my mind into the gutter?



Do you really think I'm that cheap?

And did you really think it was safe to use the word 'thrust' in a thread in which 'codpiece' has been bandied around so much?


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## Desdichado (Feb 25, 2005)

What do you mean by "safe?"


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## Rel (Feb 25, 2005)

Have you guys really had nothing better to do than this while I went to my business lunch?


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## Torm (Feb 25, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Have you guys really had nothing better to do than this while I went to my business lunch?



Do you think that we don't know that you were thinking about ENWorld/RPGs _during_ your business lunch?


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## Pielorinho (Feb 25, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> Have you guys really had nothing better to do than this while I went to my business lunch?



Am I right in thinking they served fried fish--i.e., cod pieces?

Daniel


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## Desdichado (Feb 25, 2005)

Isn't it a bit late for a business lunch in NC?

[size=-2]Did you eat Mongolian BBQ?[/size]


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## nakia (Feb 25, 2005)

Pielorinho said:
			
		

> Am I right in thinking they served fried fish--i.e., cod pieces?




Isn't Daniel clever?


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## Henry (Feb 25, 2005)

Regardless of whether he's clever, is he coming to the next Raleigh Gameday?


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## Pielorinho (Feb 25, 2005)

Will he be able to find other Ashevillians to carpool with, and will he have no other obligations that weekend?

Daniel


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## Henry (Feb 25, 2005)

Will the fact that it's on April 23rd make a difference?

Would he be honored if I said I hope he makes it?


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## Pielorinho (Feb 25, 2005)

Henry said:
			
		

> Will the fact that it's on April 23rd make a difference?
> 
> Would he be honored if I said I hope he makes it?




Who can see that far into the future--yet who would NOT be honored by the hopes of a codpiece wearing pimp?

(And is anyone else now imagining Henry covered in raw fish?)

Daniel


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## Henry (Feb 25, 2005)

Is it proper to hope you can come for the halibut?

_(And does it sink the thread to a new low to combine puns and questions?)_


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## Torm (Feb 25, 2005)

Henry said:
			
		

> _(And does it sink the thread to a new low to combine puns and questions?)_



Would it play out of line if I said I swordfish you wouldn't do that?

Are you trying to give me a haddock? Don't you realize this whole thread already almost has me in a state of shark?

Does anyone else think Henry's trying to drive us mad on porpoise?

(Or do you just think *I* should quit carping and clam up?  )


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## Henry (Feb 25, 2005)

Is there anyone who won't think me too bass if I leave for the weekend?

Pip, Pip?


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## Pielorinho (Feb 25, 2005)

Henry said:
			
		

> Is there anyone who won't think me too bass if I leave for the weekend?




You minnow posting for two days?

Daniel


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## Torm (Feb 25, 2005)

Pielorinho said:
			
		

> You minnow posting for two days?
> 
> Daniel



Don'tcha think that's too long for him to even *discus*, much less to *trout*? How *crappie* would that be?

Who thinks he'd *betta* not do that? Or should we maybe let him *goby*, for now?


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## Cyberzombie (Feb 25, 2005)

Sheesh.  You people seem to be floundering around to no porpoise...


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## Torm (Feb 25, 2005)

Cyberzombie said:
			
		

> Sheesh.  You people seem to be floundering around to no porpoise...



Does the fact that you failed to phrase that in the form of a question mean you want the wet noodle flailing? And, did you not notice I already _did_ 'porpoise'?


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## Ranger REG (Feb 26, 2005)

Torm said:
			
		

> Does the fact that you failed to phrase that in the form of a question mean you want the wet noodle flailing? And, did you not notice I already _did_ 'porpoise'?



Hmm. Suddenly I'm hungry for seafood.

Ahh. I remember the good ole days where you find a special edible treat in every can of tuna: dolphin parts. Nowadays it is rare, because of some silly animal-fetish group stopping fisherman from taking full advantage of the ocean.


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## Evilhalfling (Feb 26, 2005)

should'nt the mods be on Gar against this sort of thing? 

have we floundered yet?


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## Desdichado (Feb 26, 2005)

Evilhalfling said:
			
		

> should'nt the mods be on Gar against this sort of thing?



Isn't that why we're doing it in OT though?


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## Doug McCrae (Feb 26, 2005)

I had a dream that Pamela Anderson was running Rolemaster. She kept cheating on the die rolls. When I woke up I realised I'd fallen asleep during a session of Blue Planet run by Nicole Kidman.


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## Rel (Feb 26, 2005)

You know all these bad fish puns are making me long for yesterday when we were just talking about "issue on the table".


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## demiurge1138 (Feb 28, 2005)

I've had some odd gaming related dreams. None about games run by celebrities, but a lot where my players go insane at the table, or attack me. And I did dream a vision of Hell so dark that I had to put it into a game.

One of my fellow players in a game I'm in said that she dreamt that we (the players) were playing tag, using the magical powers of our characters. Which is a little odd... er, cod. There, I'm on (off)-topic. Aren't I?

Demiurge out.


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## Narfellus (Feb 28, 2005)

Doug McCrae, this ones for you!

[edit: Sorry, Narfellus, but even if the profanity filter can't look at pictures, Eric's grandma can.]


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## Pielorinho (Feb 28, 2005)

Ranger REG said:
			
		

> Ahh. I remember the good ole days where you find a special edible treat in every can of tuna: dolphin parts. Nowadays it is rare, because of some silly animal-fetish group stopping fisherman from taking full advantage of the ocean.




That's actually not why:  it's because of the mad scientists who made dolphins live forever.  Surely you heard the story?

For those of you who haven't heard, here it is:

It was a scientist outside of San Francisco who discovered that baby redthroated seagulls have a chemical in their brains that, when fed to dolphins, reverses their ageing process, gives them spectacular healing properties, and essentially makes them unkillable.  Of course, laws being what they are, his research was stymied by the fact that redthroated seagulls are on the Endangered Species list, and it was illegal for him to tread in their nesting ground, much less "harvest" the chicks.

That didn't stop our intrepid scientist:  he ventured out under cover of darkness with a gunny sack and started stuffing it full of the chicks.  Then he started heading back to his car--

--when what should he see, but a lion reclining in his path!  It had apparently escaped from the San Francisco Zoo earlier in the day, and now it was right there, between him and his car, wearing a smoking jacket and paging through the _New Yorker_ by the light of the full moon.

The scientist had no choice.  He walked up to it verrrry carefully, and verrrrry cautiously stepped over it.

He was almost at his car when the floodlights burst on.  "POLICE!" someone shouted through a bullhorn.  "HANDS IN THE AIR!  WE HAVE YOU SURROUNDED!"

He was quickly arrested, and charged with a serious offense:

Transporting underaged gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.

Daniel


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## Narfellus (Feb 28, 2005)

oops. Sorry. Here's the PG version.


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## Rel (Feb 28, 2005)

Pielorinho said:
			
		

> Transporting underaged gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.
> 
> Daniel




I mean no offense, but you do realize that I must kill you now.  Right?


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## Narfellus (Feb 28, 2005)

Pielorinho said:
			
		

> Transporting underaged gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises.
> 
> Daniel




So, so very very bad, i must actually share this.


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## Pielorinho (Feb 28, 2005)

Rel said:
			
		

> I mean no offense, but you do realize that I must kill you now. Right?




I'm--I'm honored, Rel!  That's the nicest thing anyone has said about my puns in a long time.

(I wish I could take credit for this one, but alas, it's not mine.  It is, as a quintuple pun, the most involved pun I know.)

Daniel


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## Rel (Feb 28, 2005)

Pielorinho said:
			
		

> I wish I could take credit for this one, but alas, it's not mine.




Oh, well since you didn't create it then maybe I'll just cut off a hand or something.  Provided you tell me where to find the person who originated it.

He must be stopped.


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## Pielorinho (Feb 28, 2005)

When you asked if I could give you a hand with the Game Day, I  didn't realize that's what you meant!

Daniel


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## Pielorinho (Feb 28, 2005)

As for where it's from, I've got no idea:  I've heard it many times.  Most recently I heard Peter Schickely (or however you spell his name) set it to an aria on Schickely Mix, about five years ago.

Daniel


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