# Ban the Thayan Menace!



## The Thayan Menace

My Fellow Roleplayers,

Although it was never my intention to rile anyone, I now realize that I have offended numerous ENworld patrons with my posts.

Therefore, I have decided to start this thread in an effort to reform my on-line persona and establish better rapport with my fellow RPG enthusiasts.

I am basically asking for any suggestions you may have on improving my relationship with all of you.

Furthermore, I promise to listen attentively to your critiques; I will not respond in a critical fashion ... regardless of what is said about me.

So ... please, give me your commentary; I really could benefit from it.

Thanks for your assistance.       

-Samir Ibn Asad (The Menace)


----------



## msd

With all due respect, it is exactly this kind of post/thread that seems to be the issue.  You seem to enjoy threads in which you are the center of attention.

My humble advice?

Sit back, relax, and just be yourself.  Not you being more clever than you really are.  Not you as you think we would like you to be.  Just sit back and focus on making a positive contribution to the community by talking the same way as if we were all sitting around a table.

















And no more #$%@#$%^&* images, please...


----------



## the Jester

I actually find you quite amusing, but to improve your relationships with others I recommend you go to Burning Man this year.  It will be a wonderful learning experience unlike anything else you've ever done or been around, and you might find that it teaches you a lot about _how to be yourself without being obnoxious._

Not that _I_ find you obnoxious- but some people obviously do.

Hey, I think they should chill out too, but whatevah.


----------



## Hand of Evil

I am offended by this thread!      Who are you and what have you done?      Oh, that, I remember when I had my first beer too.   

Self moderation.


----------



## Teflon Billy

I'd like to see some more pictures of Rick James


----------



## the Jester

Teflon Billy said:
			
		

> I'd like to see some more pictures of Rick James




Damn you, Teflon Billy.


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Being Myself: WWRJD (What Would Rick James Do?)*



			
				the Jester said:
			
		

> I actually find you quite amusing, but to improve your relationships with others I recommend you go to Burning Man this year.  It will be a wonderful learning experience unlike anything else you've ever done or been around, and you might find that it teaches you a lot about _how to be yourself without being obnoxious._



What if I simply am an obnoxious person? What are the qualities that make me annoying, and how do I mitigate them?


----------



## Psychic Warrior

Teflon Billy said:
			
		

> I'd like to see some more pictures of Rick James




That Teflon - he's a hell of a drug!

Honestly Thayan - don't let "them" bother you.  Post however you like and let the powers that be sort it out.  I have never seen you post anything truly insulting.  Some people like to have control over others (or the illusion thereof) so you will have to eat  now and again.

Note - I am NOT referring to the administration of this site here.


Oh and change your damned avatar!


----------



## the Jester

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> What if I simply am an obnoxious person? What are the qualities that make me annoying, and how do I mitigate them?




Shrug.

As I said, I don't find you obnoxious.  Sometimes I find people who are easily offended obnoxious instead (not usually here, but in RL).

Then again, I love diaglo, never find Quasqueton to be aggravating, and rarely get annoyed with the posters that seem to draw the most ire (with, of course, one or two exceptions).


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Rick James Diplomacy?*



			
				the Jester said:
			
		

> As I said, I don't find you obnoxious.



I appreciate that, but apparently quite a few people do ... and these individuals are long-time supporters of ENworld (or industry designers).

Don't get me wrong though; I often disagree with what these residents have to say, but I want to work out some way of getting along with them before I get booted off this site.

Ideally, I just want to prevent so many people complaining about me (without simply ceasing to post).


----------



## Steverooo

The only thing I've seen others get annoyed with you for is posting all the pictures...  Knock that off, and everyone except MAYBE Teflon Billy will be happy!


----------



## Hand of Evil

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> I appreciate that, but apparently quite a few people do ... and these individuals are long-time supporters of ENworld (or industry designers).
> 
> Don't get me wrong though; I often disagree with what these residents have to say, but I want to work out some way of getting along with them before I get booted off this site.
> 
> Ideally, I just want to prevent so many people complaining about me (without simply ceasing to post).




When a person starts to look for conspiracy, they start to see one.  I really do think you are making more into this than there is.  If people do not like you or your post THEY have the power to place you on an ignore list, it is their choice, need I say their right.  As long as you do not break the rules as set by the Admins and mod you have the right to post.  If the Mods and Admins had issues with you, it should be taken off-line and away from the boards.


----------



## Buttercup

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> What if I simply am an obnoxious person?




I miss Hong Ooi.


----------



## Jdvn1

I've never been offended, TM.


----------



## the Jester

Buttercup said:
			
		

> I miss Hong Ooi.




"Hong is a hell of a drug!"


----------



## Dinkeldog

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> I appreciate that, but apparently quite a few people do ... and these individuals are long-time supporters of ENworld (or industry designers).
> 
> Don't get me wrong though; I often disagree with what these residents have to say, but I want to work out some way of getting along with them before I get booted off this site.
> 
> Ideally, I just want to prevent so many people complaining about me (without simply ceasing to post).




Okay, so the best way is to read the rules.  Then read posts that other people make.  ENWorld likes to pride itself on civility; merely disagreeing won't get you "booted off this site."  Instead, look at the problems you've had and try to get along better with others, even when your opinions are different.  It is quite possible.


----------



## Darkness

Buttercup said:
			
		

> I miss Hong Ooi.



 Well, you can find him here, if it helps any.


----------



## Buttercup

Darkness said:
			
		

> Well, you can find him here, if it helps any.




I don't miss him *that* much.


----------



## Brother Shatterstone

Buttercup said:
			
		

> I don't miss him *that* much.



 

Okay onto being serious...   

Start by reading this again: 







			
				Dinkeldog said:
			
		

> Okay, so the best way is to read the rules.  Then read posts that other people make.  ENWorld likes to pride itself on civility; merely disagreeing won't get you "booted off this site."  Instead, look at the problems you've had and try to get along better with others, even when your opinions are different.  It is quite possible.




Now read my version.

Don't post as much and instead watch and learn the unwritten rules, I'm not going to tell you to read the written rules as that's been done twice already, and then comeback and post.  

For whatever reason you don't seem to understand them, I've what had to deal with you twice in the Gamer seeking Gamer section?  I'm positively dumbfounded how that's happened.

Anyhow, thanks for asking and I hope you appreciated the brutal but truthful answer that you asked for.


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Of Feedback & Thread Ethics*

I appreciate the feedback.

Believe me, I am learning a lot about ENworld's "unwritten code" of civility (i.e., "Rule 0").

However, any additional specifics would be appreciated.


----------



## Zappo

I've never been bothered by you at all - though maybe I wasn't in the right threads? I found the pictures funny, though they did tend to confuse threads a bit.


----------



## the Jester

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> I appreciate the feedback.
> 
> Believe me, I am learning a lot about ENworld's "unwritten code" of civility (i.e., "Rule 0").
> 
> However, any additional specifics would be appreciated.




Basically, comport yourself as you would with someone you didn't know well but wanted to establish a strong friendship with and you should be okay.  

Remember, you _don't_ know them well, and you aren't sure what will offend them- so mind your P's and Q's and dot your I's and cross your T's.  Or something like that.


----------



## RangerWickett

My wisdom - don't ask for advice on your personality. Especially don't do it often. People start to perceive you as the guy who can't handle life on his own, and they start taking every opportunity to tell you what you're doing wrong, even to the point of imagining you doing things, or taking mundane actions in the wrong light.

Honestly, dude, all you're guilty of is repeating a joke too many times. Unless you want to make the joke all you are (much like Hong and Diaglo do with their particular oddities), you should not repeat a joke more than 3 times.


----------



## Steverooo

Buttercup said:
			
		

> I don't miss him *that* much.




WHAT?!?  Hong is gone?!?  Whatever will we do with the Hong-stick?


----------



## the Jester

Steverooo said:
			
		

> WHAT?!?  Hong is gone?!?  Whatever will we do with the Hong-stick?




*WHACK!!*

(beats Severooo with the hong stick)


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Keep Up the Useful Advice*



			
				RangerWickett said:
			
		

> My wisdom - don't ask for advice on your personality.



Don't worry, I'm comfortable enough with my own persona. I just want tips on avoiding mass-complaints and, more importantly, moderator wrath.


----------



## Dinkeldog

The best way is to have a personality--your own personality, not a persona.  Then to not be a jerk to other people.  If you find that you are able to get along with others in real life even if they disagree with you, then you have all the tools you need to get along fine here.

ENWorld is a rather forgiving place.  Even if you start with a reputation as a jerk, it's not too difficult to mature into a reasonable member that is valued by much of the community.


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Word ....*



			
				Dinkeldog said:
			
		

> Even if you start with a reputation as a jerk, it's not too difficult to mature into a reasonable member that is valued by much of the community.



That's what I'm hoping.


----------



## hong

Buttercup said:
			
		

> I don't miss him *that* much.




I saw that.


----------



## diaglo

hong said:
			
		

> I saw that.



i thought you adze that.

ZzzzZzzzzzz...


----------



## hong

diaglo said:
			
		

> i thought you adze that.
> 
> ZzzzZzzzzzz...




Hey there diaglo! I've been getting into a bunch of stuff by your neighbours in Stoned Mountain, Jawja.


----------



## diaglo

hong said:
			
		

> Hey there diaglo! I've been getting into a bunch of stuff by your neighbours in Stoned Mountain, Jawja.




1.1 miles from my house as the crow flies.

diaglo "who knows people who dumpster dived at the warehouse" Ooi


----------



## Jdvn1

hong said:
			
		

> I saw that.



 It must be a ghost. Disregard that poster.


----------



## Truth Seeker

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> I appreciate the feedback.
> 
> Believe me, I am learning a lot about ENworld's "unwritten code" of civility (i.e., "Rule 0").
> 
> However, any additional specifics would be appreciated.




One rule...don't be nerdy!


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Don't Call it a Comeback*

Wow ... this thread managed to bring Hong out of retirement. Who would have thought it possessed such nefarious power?


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Anti-Nerd Sentiment?*



			
				Truth Seeker said:
			
		

> One rule...don't be nerdy!



Dude, I play D&D ... it's far too late for that.


----------



## Truth Seeker

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> Dude, I play D&D ... it's far too late for that.




Sorry, 30 years later, it is time to gradute to a new title...I am...GAMER!!!


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Destroy All Monsters*



			
				Truth Seeker said:
			
		

> Sorry, 30 years later, it is time to gradute to a new title...I am...GAMER!!!



I greatly prefer ... GAM-OR!!! For some reason, it reminds me of a _Godzilla_ movie.






I've always dug _Godzilla_ ....​


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*The ENworld Cosmology: What I Have Learned*

Well, so far I have figured out the following:

1. Pictures are to be posted sparingly.

2. Pointing out another poster's foibles or inconsistencies constitutes a "personal attack".

3. Criticizing a game company or industry designer is to be avoided.

4. Making jokes about a gaming company or industry employee is also not acceptable.

5. You do not debate other posters, even if you disagree with them.

6. Rick James is a hell of a drug, but his time is over.

7. Not everyone likes me, but I can live with that.

8. Conversing with people I disagree with can get me in trouble.

9. I will probably spend most of my time in the Playing the Game section to avoid trouble.

Still, any further lessons would be appreciated ....


----------



## Teflon Billy

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> Well, so far I have figured out the following:
> 
> 1. Pictures are to be posted sparingly.
> 
> 2. Pointing out another poster's foibles or inconsistencies constitutes a "personal attack".
> 
> 3. Criticizing a game company or industry designer is to be avoided.
> 
> 4. Making jokes about a gaming company or industry employee is also not acceptable.
> 
> 5. You do not debate other posters, even if you disagree with them.
> 
> 6. Rick James is a hell of a drug, but his time is over.
> 
> 7. Not everyone likes me, but I can live with that.
> 
> 8. Conversing with people I disagree with can get me in trouble.
> 
> 9. I will probably spend most of my time in the Playing the Game section to avoid trouble.
> 
> Still, any further lessons would be appreciated ....





Nope you've pretty much got it


----------



## RangerWickett

Seniority helps. 

1. Pictures are to be posted sparingly.
Pictures are fine if they're on topic. The classic internet random joke picture (like "You found teh winnar!" Rinndalir was so found of) are akin to jumping into a conversation and shouting "Boogabooga!"

2. Pointing out another poster's foibles or inconsistencies constitutes a "personal attack".
You're wrong. So wrong, you're the wrongedest wrongster on wrongstreet. 

But yeah, you pretty much hit the nail on the head. If someone's irritating you, it's okay to say, "Dude, you're irritating me. Here's why. Please stop it because I don't want to have to rely on the moderators to solve my problems." But if you just think someone is a little weird (like Nightfall; sheesh, can that man say nothing but "Scarred Lands!"?), keep it to yourself unless it's actively an issue.

3. Criticizing a game company or industry designer is to be avoided.
This is actually a touchy one. Criticizing a _product_ is fine. Ditto with a product line. Ditto with art or design or rules vel cetera. I, for instance, thought the Complete Guide to monsters from Goodman Games had pretty mediocre art, and some of the mechanics were unnecessarily divergent from what I'd expect in d20. But I'll not say an ill word against Joe Goodman, or the writers, or the artists themselves. It's okay to dislike someone's work. It's rude to talk about disliking a person.

There are a few rude industry folks who post in the Publishers forum and step on toes, and while it's . . . eh, _acceptable_ to grouse about them, it's not really good.

4. Making jokes about a gaming company or industry employee is also not acceptable.
Well, yeah.


5. You do not debate other posters, even if you disagree with them.
I can see where you'd get this, but it's not really accurate. As long as you're not vitriolic, debate all you want. Just don't debate about religion or politics. Don't call names, etc. Y'know, basically if your parents would have disciplined you for doing something, don't do it here.

6. Rick James is a hell of a drug, but his time is over.
Not in my ghost-riddled d20 Modern game!

7. Not everyone likes me, but I can live with that.
I actually think that's written somewhere in the Terms of Usage for the messageboards. . . .

8. Conversing with people I disagree with can get me in trouble.
Restraint.

9. I will probably spend most of my time in the Playing the Game section to avoid trouble.
I never go in there. It's a dark and scary place. Full of dice.


----------



## Brother Shatterstone

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> Well, so far I have figured out the following:




It looked good till you got to number 9 but behave yourself and you will be fine…


----------



## diaglo

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> Still, any further lessons would be appreciated ....



don't mess with the hong or you'll get the stick.


----------



## Truth Seeker

10. Try to balance all that you discovered, through rule #1 to 9...in one sitting


----------



## Angel Tarragon

diaglo said:
			
		

> don't mess with the hong or you'll get the stick.



Wel I for one am not afraid of Hongs' Hongstick.


----------



## reveal

Frukathka said:
			
		

> Wel I for one am not afraid of Hongs' Hongstick.




You will be. You. Will. Be.


----------



## Ghostwind

The counter to the Hongstick is a wet trout slap...


Thayan, the best advice you can heed is to simply think before you post. If your post sounds like it could be taken wrong, then take a moment to reword it so it may not sound so confrontation or negative. Publishers and individuals do not mind criticism as long as it is done in a polite and constrictive manner. And that is something you will pick up as you get more involved with the community.


----------



## Truth Seeker

Ghostwind said:
			
		

> The counter to the Hongstick is a wet trout slap...




And depending on the size of the trout...The slap can be heard around the world.


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Gracias*

Good advice everyone; keep it coming.


----------



## kirinke

diaglo said:
			
		

> don't mess with the hong or you'll get the stick.




I gave hypersmurf a +2 hongstick once.... I think he put an additional enchantment on it: bane of hong.  

But to that. Politness, politness, politness rules here. Nothingland is where you can be rude, crude and socially unacceptable.


----------



## Berandor

I just think Thayan's posts come off dirisive and belittling. It's not really the content that caused me to put him on ignore, but the style.

It happens to all of us sometimes, but I got the impression in a lot of posts - and again in his "rules" above. The rules don't speak of someone really examining something, but of bitterness.

So, Thayan, my advice would be, "It's not what you say, but how you say it." And an addendum, "emoticons don't make a bad post good."

You can disagree with people all you want, and critisize them, too. But doing so and making the biggest part of your post advice on correct spelling and then, if the other person tells you their spelling is correct and proves it, responding "I know" - or exaggerating their arguments out of proportion, is not the way to do it.

Yes, I know other posters are doing it, too. All I can say is to get on my ignore list, you must have a series or history of either passive-aggressive arguments, or of not taking other posters seriously. And this series or history must be long or strong enough to overshadow any positive posts I remember you making.

For you, it was not taking other opinions seriously.


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Interesting ....*



			
				Berandor said:
			
		

> Yes, I know other posters are doing it, too. All I can say is to get on my ignore list, you must have a series or history of either passive-aggressive arguments, or of not taking other posters seriously.



You once called me your "new guru". Et tu Berandor?


----------



## Angel Tarragon

reveal said:
			
		

> You will be. You. Will. Be.



Nope. Not ever.


----------



## Berandor

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> You once called me your "new guru". Et tu Berandor?



You see. that was soo '04!

I'd forgotten. Totally.

But that old thread shows your promise, padawan. You are hereby put on parole and off my ignore list again.


----------



## The Thayan Menace

Berandor said:
			
		

> But that old thread shows your promise, padawan. You are hereby put on parole and off my ignore list again.



  ​


----------



## BSF

Berandor said:
			
		

> I just think Thayan's posts come off dirisive and belittling. It's not really the content that caused me to put him on ignore, but the style.
> 
> It happens to all of us sometimes, but I got the impression in a lot of posts - and again in his "rules" above. The rules don't speak of someone really examining something, but of bitterness.
> 
> So, Thayan, my advice would be, "It's not what you say, but how you say it." And an addendum, "emoticons don't make a bad post good."
> 
> You can disagree with people all you want, and critisize them, too. But doing so and making the biggest part of your post advice on correct spelling and then, if the other person tells you their spelling is correct and proves it, responding "I know" - or exaggerating their arguments out of proportion, is not the way to do it.
> 
> Yes, I know other posters are doing it, too. All I can say is to get on my ignore list, you must have a series or history of either passive-aggressive arguments, or of not taking other posters seriously. And this series or history must be long or strong enough to overshadow any positive posts I remember you making.
> 
> For you, it was not taking other opinions seriously.




For me it was mostly too many posts without any real contribution to the topic.  Incessant, non-productive sniping, coupled with a bunch of smilies to appear 'clever'.  Nothing offensive, nothing directly aimed at me, just annoying.  Coupled with the lame pictures, I finally found that my EN World experience was much better reducing posts to a just a couple of lines of wasted browser space rather than several of lines with a picture.

My response to meeting somebody similar at a dinner party would be to walk away because the person isn't worth the time.  

Incidentally, I stopped by the thread because I was suprised anybody would post such a thing.  Then I noted that the first post was #2 and I finally checked to see who the thread starter was.  I don't think the Thayan Menace needs to be banned.  I would have been happy to just have useful contributions by him in threads I read.


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Constructive Commentary is Appreciated*



			
				BardStephenFox said:
			
		

> I don't think the Thayan Menace needs to be banned.  I would have been happy to just have useful contributions by him in threads I read.



I will endeavor to be more useful in the future (as I have been in the past, according to Berandor); thanks for checking out the thread ....


----------



## genshou

Dinkeldog said:
			
		

> ENWorld is a rather forgiving place.  Even if you start with a reputation as a jerk, it's not too difficult to mature into a reasonable member that is valued by much of the community.



Exactly!  Like me... except I'm not sure if I'm valued by the community for anything but the fact that I'm paying to keep it going 
[Edit: That and the fact that I've pretty much become *RangerWickett*'s toady, actively promoting his books in a number of threads.]

I posted a few times in 2003, when I first joined.  There was a 2-year period of inactivity, and you'd be surprised by how big of a difference it made in my civility.  I'm shocked I was that mean (and stupid) back then.  Give yourself time.  Eventually, you'll learn from the examples of others around you.  Oh, you can still be stubborn and argumentative.  Is there anyone out there who'd like to assign those traits to me?  But you can learn to do it in a civil manner, as I hope I have.


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*I Don't Intend to Stop Posting*



			
				genshou said:
			
		

> I posted a few times in 2003, when I first joined. There was a 2-year period of inactivity, and you'd be surprised by how big of a difference it made in my civility.



Okay .... However, I don't plan to take a hiatus; I find ENworld's resources too valuable to simply drop them for such a long period of time. Hopefully, I can pick up whatever tips I need from this thread, and move on as quickly as possible.


----------



## Truth Seeker

So...are you still asking to banned?


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*I'm Game if You Are*



			
				Truth Seeker said:
			
		

> So...are you still asking to banned?



Sure, why not?


----------



## Truth Seeker

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> Sure, why not?




Hey, be careful with that wish...strange things have happen here


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Words of Wisdom*



			
				Truth Seeker said:
			
		

> Hey, be careful with that wish ... strange things have happen [sic] here.



My hate of d02 know no limit. I am not afraid.


----------



## Connorsrpg

Other advice.  If you make comment on someone waiting for a return - make comment on that return 

(Players of mine finally made to this thread...and you had left )

http://www.enworld.org/showthread.php?t=144113&page=2&pp=40

 

Ahhh DAMN IT!!

Been awaiting a rely for a while and then I go and post this, only to find you HAVE replied last between me being on last night and this morning.

Ah, Thayan...you are are fine by me


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*"Recognizing"*



			
				Connorsrpg said:
			
		

> Ah, Thayan ... you are are fine by me.



I consider you a decent chap as well. A bit stingy with the treasure perhaps, but decent nonetheless.


----------



## fett527

BardStephenFox said:
			
		

> For me it was mostly too many posts without any real contribution to the topic.  Incessant, non-productive sniping, coupled with a bunch of smilies to appear 'clever'.  Nothing offensive, nothing directly aimed at me, just annoying.  Coupled with the lame pictures, I finally found that my EN World experience was much better reducing posts to a just a couple of lines of wasted browser space rather than several of lines with a picture.
> 
> My response to meeting somebody similar at a dinner party would be to walk away because the person isn't worth the time.
> 
> Incidentally, I stopped by the thread because I was suprised anybody would post such a thing.  Then I noted that the first post was #2 and I finally checked to see who the thread starter was.  I don't think the Thayan Menace needs to be banned.  I would have been happy to just have useful contributions by him in threads I read.




Just saw this and will chime in since I was pretty vocal on the RJ thread.  I will quote BSF as his words are pretty much how I felt about it.

I will reiterate also to be yourself, your personality, and not a persona.  And I never put anyone on ignore lists.  And if you ever see the Dawn of the Dead remake I'll still comment about with you in the TV/Movie/Books forum.


----------



## fett527

Oh, and another rule:

11. Never correct Crothian's spelling.


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*The Home Stretch*

Thanks for the advice folks; I think I'm almost done here.


----------



## reveal

fett527 said:
			
		

> Oh, and another rule:
> 
> 11. Never correct Crothian's spelling.




But his grammar is fair game!


----------



## Brother Shatterstone

Subject said:
			
		

> Ban the Thayan Menace!




Has this been done yet?


----------



## The Thayan Menace

Brother Shatterstone said:
			
		

> Has this been done yet?



No, but I'm working on it.


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*This Party's Over*

Okay, I think we're done here ....







Thanks for the advice everyone.       ​


----------



## Brother Shatterstone

The Thayan Menace said:
			
		

> Thanks for the advice everyone.




I guess we don’t need to ask if you taken any of this advice to heart…


----------



## The Thayan Menace

*Later*

Seriously though folks ....

Thanks again, but I'm done here.


----------

