# Norwegian jokes on Swedes



## Bullgrit (Feb 25, 2013)

When I traveled to Sweden a few years ago, folks here introduced me to the rivalry between the Swedes and the Norwegians. There were several jokes bandied about. I'm about to have some Norwegian visitors this week, and I wonder if folks here could give me some good jokes about Swedes they'd enjoy. (Jokes appropriate for a workplace environment.)

Bullgrit


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## Umbran (Feb 25, 2013)

The only swede I know had all the brains of a rutabaga.


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## jonesy (Feb 25, 2013)

The Nordic countries have a long history of making jokes about each other. Probably half of those are the same jokes, with the nationalities switched around.

Why did the swede drive five times around the block before getting home? His turn signal jammed.

How do you sink a swedish submarine? Knock.

How can you recognize swedish toilet paper? It has instructions on every sheet.


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## Dannyalcatraz (Feb 25, 2013)

Umbran said:


> The only swede I know had all the brains of a rutabaga.




That is good news for vegan zombies!


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## RangerWickett (Feb 25, 2013)

My mom used to sing, 

A thousand Swedes went through the weeds,
Chasing one Norwegian.
A thousand Swedes ran through the weeds,
_Chased_ by one Norwegian.


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## Iosue (Feb 26, 2013)

Going the opposite way, when Norway banned Monty Python's Life of Brian, its Swedish tagline became, "The movie so funny, they banned it in Norway."


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## Janx (Feb 26, 2013)

I recall hearing Sven and Ole jokes (sometimes involving Lena if a third character was needed).

Pretty much all of them are just replays of "demographic" jokes.  I'd heard many of them retold as dumb Aggie* jokes.  They were usually tamer than "really racist" jokes, and usually told with the Fargo accent (aka what all Minnesotans, Wisconsinites, Yupers and Canadians sound like).

Nowadays, it's probably not cool to tell jokes with any racial demographic.  Archie Bunker was probably the last guy to get away with telling a polock joke.

*In Texas, an Aggie is a student from Texas A&M, which they consider a really big deal.  they probably have the prize for the school with the highest solidarity and school spirit on the planet.  It's like a cult.


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## vegaserik01 (Mar 2, 2013)

Janx said:


> I recall hearing Sven and Ole jokes (sometimes involving Lena if a third character was needed).
> 
> Pretty much all of them are just replays of "demographic" jokes.  I'd heard many of them retold as dumb Aggie* jokes.  They were usually tamer than "really racist" jokes, and usually told with the Fargo accent (aka what all Minnesotans, Wisconsinites, Yupers and Canadians sound like).




Speaking as someone from Minnesota, we don't all sound like that - just like all Californians don't sound like surfers. But yes Sven and Ole jokes are good for such occasions  I grew up by Brainerd (the town in the movie Fargo) and I never heard anyone talk like them.


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## Morrus (Mar 3, 2013)

These things are the same jokes all over the world. Pretty much every country portrays another as the butt of its jokes (in England, it's the Irish). 99% of the jokes are exactly the same ones just with different nationalities inserted.


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## Dannyalcatraz (Mar 3, 2013)

Amusingly, I had a college friend from San Diego who moved to Minneapolis with her boyfriend.  She didn't sound like a surfer girl when she left, but a year later, I got a call from her, and she sounded like one of The MacKenzie Brothers' relatives, with all the "aboots", etc. in her speech.


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## Dannyalcatraz (Mar 3, 2013)

Morrus said:


> These things are the same jokes all over the world. Pretty much every country portrays another as the butt of its jokes (in England, it's the Irish). 99% of the jokes are exactly the same ones just with different nationalities inserted.




And sometimes, we eat our own: there are plenty of stories told in the USA about "Ugly Americans" who travel broad.  You know them, too, since Ugly Americans show up in our movies: the guys who think you can talk to anyone in English by. Speaking.  Mooorrree.  Sloooowwwwwly.  Or with a stereotypical accent.  Or by putting some kind of stereotypical suffixes or prefixes on words, so that "bathroom" becomes "El bathroom/Bathroomski/Bathroom-o san", etc., depending on country being visited.


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## Morrus (Mar 3, 2013)

Dannyalcatraz said:


> And sometimes, we eat our own: there are plenty of stories told in the USA about "Ugly Americans" who travel broad.  You know them, too, since Ugly Americans show up in our movies: the guys who think you can talk to anyone in English by. Speaking.  Mooorrree.  Sloooowwwwwly.  Or with a stereotypical accent.  Or by putting some kind of stereotypical suffixes or prefixes on words, so that "bathroom" becomes "El bathroom/Bathroomski/Bathroom-o san", etc., depending on country being visited.




I think that's largely a myth - you think it about yourselves more than anyone else thinks it about you.  I've certainly never experienced it except once in Rome, and when it happened it was _soooo_ comical (Sharon and I were pissing ourselves with laughter) that that speaks to its actual rarity.

It was amusing though.  We were in Rome and for some godawful reason decided to hook up with one of those horrific touristy "tours".  No, I don't know why, either.  Anyhow, it was a mix of nationalities, mainly European, and one American middle-aged couple.  The man was wearing the silly costume (the beige shorts, trainers, baseball cap, sunglasses) so he stood out anyway.  The tour guide, an Italian lady, gave a short speech in English in an Italian accent, and the American tourist said loudly to his wife so everyone could hear, "Is SHE talking AMERICAN?  Cuz I can't understand her!"  He got some dirty looks, but everyone ignored him, including most of the English people there who don't recognise "American" as a language.  So the tour continues, this guy grumbling loudly to the point where I'm sure someone's going to punch him.  It gets crowded, so the Italian lady uses an umbrella (as tour guides often do all over the world) to show where she is. The American guy asks "_Is that supposed to be an American flag?_"

No, dude.  It's not.  It's that lady's umbrella.  You . 

We were bent double with laughter the whole time. We entertained ourselves following that couple and just listening to them.  It was seriously like a cartoon or something.

Fortunately, that's my only experience of this. I don't think it's at all typical. Americans in my experience have been very considerate and polite travelers - and I've hosted a few.  They shout everything, that's for sure, but they can't help that.


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## Dannyalcatraz (Mar 3, 2013)

Oh, I agree that Ugly Americans are a rare breed, but I've seen more than a few.  At least they're mostly harmless.

OTOH, I've had the misfortune of traveling with a few of my countrymen who were also psychotic.  The kind who don't listen to the tour guide's advice about drinking contests and political discussions in Russia...  One guy almost got us kicked out of our hotel in Moscow on day 2 of our trip...and again in St. Petersburg.

One trip with an Ugly American that I _wasn't_ on involved a classmate of mine who got scolded (in English) for practicing his German cuss words in public.

As you say, loudly.


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