# The Acrimonious Adventurer Association



## Hairy Minotaur

Lord Palmere surveyed the lot of thugs and miscreants that had come to his estate this fine morning. The merchant lord has placed an ad for able bodied entrepreneurs, Lord Palmere had expected the occasional righteous individual, but as he looked over the collection of nary-do-wells he spotted several holy warriors that would have to be weeded out.

Lost in thought, Lord Palmere hadn't heard his butler slave approach him from the foyer to the Lord's left. 

"Appears you're bidding will be done mi'lord." The slave spoke but dared not look upon his master's face. 

"Yes, begin by moving the paladins and anyone who appears more interested in my home than my offer." Understanding Lord Palmere's meaning, the slave ushered over a dozen other slaves and assigned each one to a guest he had surmised was going to have ethical questions regarding the work his master was about the offer. However the butler mixed in some beggars and known thieves in as well, so as not to appear to the casual viewer that any one particular group was being singled out.

After the obvious representatives from the churches of Maal and Terak were separated from the rest of the guests, along with the known cheats, Lord Palmere spoke to clustered group.

"As you know, my name is Lord Palmere and I have acquired the distinct honor of receiving a very distinguished guest of honor from Virdistan. A powerful merchant in that city and one whom I hope to engage in profitable discussions while he visits our fair city." Palmere paused as a few men in the back left the entry hall and exited Palmere's estate.

"To further my ends, I have need of a select few individuals to help me with a decorating dilemma I face. I shall pay the handsome sum of six-hundred gold kings for this service." Palmere paused again to let the crowd dwindle some more to just over two dozen individuals remained.

"It requires utmost secrecy as the Overlord will not look favorable upon you if you fail." That comment got the group squirming, over half of the crowd quickly and quietly left the entry hall. Now faced with only ten of the job seekers left, Palmere felt the time was right to start on the individual interviews.

He had refreshments brought out for those remaining, small salmon appetizers on flat bread and underaged elven wine that he had planned on throwing out anyway. Palmere left the entry hall, as the last of the desperate filed up to sample the free food and wine, to personally dismiss those that the butler had separated out earlier.

When Palmere returned to the entry hall he noted the eclectic group that had answered his ad. Two ogres, a troll, a centaur, 4 humans, a teifling, and a halfling mulled around the hall, occasionally glancing between each other and the fine art work Palmere chose to display to those who knew nothing about fine art.

Palmere thought to himself that is he could get the two ogres and the troll, he might even get out of having to pay them altogether. The job was a simple one, well simple for those with mean dispositions who didn't like a little blood on their hands.

Palmere had scoured Highcastle for the perfect spot to host and impress the visiting diplomat. Palmere had paid a high marker to learn that the new diplomat was well versed in the performing arts and fine sculptures. Palmere hoped to gain favor with the diplomat and use that to leverage a monopoly on high end gems coming from the mountains surrounding Virdistan. To this end he located a crumbling and decrepit ruin on a small hill just outside of the city's east gate. Normally a haven for goblins, Palmere tried to buy the land and have the goblins removed legally. However he misplayed his hand and bribed the wrong official and now it was too late in the game to start over and go back to the courts to get it done legally.

Thus he arrived at his current predicament, he had placed an ad hoping to lure some people of desperate disposition or at least those with low enough ethics to no care for another creature, but high enough morals to abide by the six-hundred gold king gag order. He needed to remove the Maalites from the equation since their church ran the courts and legal system in Highcastle. Palmere also removed those with stronger ties to the thieves guild than to the gold currency Palmere was trying to buy them with. The overlord would not stand for Palmere circumventing his legal system, so Palmere needed men desperate enough to need the money and unconnected enough that if they were caught, Palmere could buy their silence from a well placed bribe to the Assassin's Guild.

Excited about the future, Palmere strode into his entry hall brimming with the confidence of a man who believed he had all the answers. He chose to speak with the centaur first, the ogres and troll seemed to be enjoying the food too well right now to be interrupted.

"We don't see many centaurs in the city, what brings you to this fine example of haut monde?" Palmere asked

"A desire to see what I could only imagine beyond my valley, and to embrace the sense of curiosity my father possessed." Responded the centaur

"Yes, well how do you feel about goblins?" Palmere asked pointedly

"I have heard of them and eagerly await my opportunity to meet one in person." The centaur answered excitedly

"How long have you been in Highcastle?" The Merchant Lord asked

"Only a few days, I admit to spending most of my time in the horse markets. I have been searching for an excuse to force myself to explore more of what this city has to offer, your posting seemed like the perfect solution for me."

Palmere mulled over the centaur's response, if the centaur had only been in Highcastle a few days, it was likely he had no idea of the local laws and might be perfect to help the merchant with his problem.

"I have recently purchased a small, I thought was abandoned, ruined building just to the southeast of the city. Unfortunately the goblins who were squatting there did not take kindly to my announcement that they would now have to vacate the property. I need some motivated individuals to convince them that it's best they leave. I don't really care how you do it, only that you do it in less than seventy-two hours as my decorators will not be able to turn the property around fast enough without a two-week timeframe." 

"And this job will pay money with which to use to purchase services within the city?" The centaur asked

"Oh yes, yes it will." Palmere replied

"Then Xanthos agrees to relocate the goblins."

Palmere smiled, if the rest of the applicants were as socially inept as this guy, it was going to be a simple matter to get what he wanted. Palmere called for one of the ogres next.

"What brings you to the core of civilization my large fellow?"

"Doopa need money." The ogre answers

"Yes, well maybe Doopa should have answered my ad then?" 

"Doopa, decorate. Get money, buy big horse." The ogre said through a forced enunciation

Palmere comprehended that the ogre's name was Doopa, "You need to get rid of some goblins first."

"Arrgh!" With the mention of goblins, Doopa became enraged and pounded his heavy wooden club on the floor in front of Palmere

Palmere snapped his fingers and five slaves formed a line between Doopa and Palmere, his butler as well came to Palmere's side.

"Shall I see this one out?" Palmere's butler asked 

"Not yet, I think his rage towards goblins may serve me well in my scheme."

Next up was the teifling

"I've seen your kind before, although I've yet to have purchased the services of any hitherto." Palmere started

"Then let's not waste time prancing around your insecurities and get down to you telling me who you need killed." The teifling responded

Taken aback by the bluntness of the teifling, Palmere cleared his throat and began. "I don't need anyone killed, just removed. A group of goblins that are trespassing on some property I own."

"Really? I heard about those guys. You know my brother Tehas? He sent my a letter about some goblins he encountered in a derelict ruin outside of town."

"No, I do not know any of your kind. I am intrigued by your prior knowledge of the situation though. When did your brother visit?" Palmere inquired

"Couple of months ago, the head honcho he was working for told him he wanted to go in a different direction and wanted to start over again. I haven't heard from him since. You're not that guy are you?" 

"Heavens no, are you deaf? Have you not heard that I have had no previous dealings with any of your kind?" Palmere exasperated

"Well good, so do you pay me now or when I'm done kicking the gob out of the goblins?"

"I pay you if I hire you, and when the job is complete. Were you conceived yesterday?" Palmere replies sarcastically

"Well your choice is clear then, you should hire me, Menthos Lyptus. Anyone willing to circumvent the Overlord's courts and squat on some squatters can see that." Menthos smiled at the merchant with a twinkle of full understanding in his eye.

Palmere hired the teifling in the hopes that he would die before collecting the money.

Palmere next called for the troll.

"I'm sorry mi'lord but he left. Apparently he smelled the food and followed the crowd in. He became belligerent when he ate the last of the appetizers and killed a tray holder and carried his carcass out the door with him." Palmere's butler reported

"Tsk, what a shame. Could have used that kind of go getter. Oh well, make sure we replace the tray holder by next weekend."

Palmere interviewed the other ogre next and hired him, Turgar seemed a little brighter than Doopa and Palmere especially liked the dragon motif* Turgar had adorned himself with. The Merchant Lord then interviewed the halfling and two of the humans but sent them away after admitted to having no equipment or measurable skills with which to complete the task.

The last two humans were a scout by the name of Kessen, Palmere hired him thinking he could be a guiding light to the ogres and point them in the direction of the goblins and then get out of the way. Plus he hailed from the Plains of Cairns and had previously dealt with ogres and goblins near his homeland. The last human was a Trueborn** named Haimish, blessed at birth by the gods, the Trueborn were outcasts as most people didn't want a visual reminder that they were unfit to receive the god's blessing. Trueborns therefore got along well with the trolls and ogres of society, so he seemed like a good lubricant for the two ogre cogs.

With six individuals chosen, Palmere gave them rough directions to where the ruins were located and told them in no uncertain terms that the goblins must be gone in seventy-two hours or there would be no compensation.



* Turgar's class is Dragon Shaman

** Trueborn are from Dawnforge, they're like high-powered Aasimar


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## Hairy Minotaur

*Are we there yet?*

Lord Palmere's slave leads the six strangers through the East Gate of Highcastle and then southeast towards a small hill that looks out of place among the farmland on this side of the city. The gigantic sprawling Dearthwood gave a dark green backdrop to the hill, even from this distance one could make out the standing stone blocks of what remained of a fort built atop the hill. The slave pointed to the hill and then left the group to return to Lord Palmere's mansion.

"Well, looks like our guide has abandoned us, who here among us has dealt with goblins before?" Xanthos asked. The centaur was still growing and had not yet attained the size usually seen in wild centaurs.

"Doopa smash!" The ogre slammed his club, so massive was it that it could double as a tree trunk for partial concealment.

Doopa swings his dire stirge swatter around his head, in an impressive manner, until he locked eyes on Turgar, the other ogre in the group. Doopa slowed his swinging and let out a low growl. "Not Gouged Wound Clan!" Doopa shouted as he pointed his club at Turgar.

"No, nor would I want to be. I say we leave the mongrel behind, he's just as likely to join the goblins as he is to kill them." Turgar responds

Impressed with the articulate response from Turgar, Haimish offers his thoughts "Seems to me that you two have more hate than a dire gnat in a salt quarry, I think it wise to complete the part where I get paid and then you two can fight it out like two snow elves in a bakery."

"What? That made absolutely no sense. If you're going to attempt to interject your thoughts into a conversation, please do so coherently." Menthos clamors

"Hey, no need to go all winged frog on me, I was just trying to calm the two beastmen down." Haimish counters

"Again with the stupid analogies and metaphors, just shut up already." Menthos shouts

Confused with all this fancy talk, Doopa shrugs his shoulders and takes aim at Turgar. The ogre rears back his weapon as Turgar whips out a longsword for defense. Doopa surges forward, only to be halted by the shining object presented to Doopa's eyesight. Almost trancelike, the ogre takes the shining coin from the outstretched hand of Kessen. Turning the coin over in his fingers, Doopa soon forgets everything else except for the shiny.

"Impressive, have you much training with them?" Xanthos inquires of Kessen

Ignoring the question, Kessen turns to the hill and calls back "Keep moving, we're going to need more of those soon." 

The trip should have taken just over an hour, however Xanthos insisted upon stopping at each new plant and rock in order to sketch and catalogue each one in a small book he produced from a saddle bag draped across his hindquarters. Kessen and Menthos would have been happy to leave him behind, but every time Xanthos stopped so did the two ogres and Haimish.

"Ranger?" Menthos asked of Kessen

"Not exactly, although most of my family is." Kessen replied, "What skills do you planning on bringing to bear on the goblins?"

"Me? I'm a highly trained recluse, I've been sighted in four counties." Menthos says proudly.

"Hrmph, you thieves are all alike" Kessen says as he turns back to the hill

"Thief? No, although I do plan on playing one soon, we should stick together. I got your back." Menthos replied

Two and a half hours after departing Highcastle, the group reaches the base of the small hill. Kessen notes the wind direction and advises that the group approach from the other side of the hill, so as not to give away their presence by sent. The party agrees and circles around the hill, stopping every ten feet so that Xanthos could catalogue another plant. The party ascends the hill and views two areas of downed and crumbling stone blocks.

Kessen approaches the nearest set of stones and sniffs the air, then crouching behind a side-laying stone, Kessen spots an entrance leading down into the hill. He rushes back to the party and reports his findings.

Curious to see if he could do the same, Doopa runs to the far set of stones and sniffs the air. His stomach immediately picks up the scent of burning rabbit. Doopa's mouth begins to water, and he begins to descend the set of stairs from which the scent is emanating from.

The party yells for Doopa to stop, but the ogre's stomach it too determined. The rest of the group sprints across the hilltop to where they last saw Doopa.

"Dumb ogre, ruined a great chance at surprise." Kessen shot through gnashed teeth.

"Now, you didn't really expect that guy to follow anything that came out of your mouth did you? I on the other hand, find this tactic to be most appealing, let the ogre go in first. Then us." Menthos replies

"That ogre's as dense as the moral compass of levitating pumice." Haimish observes.

"Oh! You shall have to point me to that phenomenon, I must catalogue that." Xanthos pleads

"Maybe, remember patience is like the morose rock. Abiding by that edict will surely bring you closer to near than to far." Haimish states.

Kessen reaches the stairs and peering down, sees Doopa about halfway down. The ogre looks back up and seeing the rest of the group, motions for them to be quite. "Doopa hear voices." The ogre nearly shouts, while pointing to the bottom of the stairs.


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## pogre

> Are we there yet?


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## Hairy Minotaur

*Despot Ruins*

Kessen clearly heard three distinct voices, two seemed to be arguing with the third voice egging the other two on. Kessen held up three fingers and pointed below. Doopa waved him off and pointed at himself then below. Confused Kessen pointed to his ears, then held up three fingers and then pointed below. Doopa pointed to his massive tree trunk of a club and them to himself and then below. Annoyed, Menthos waved off both of them and held his finger up to his mouth and blew "shhhhh"

"I think we can take them through stealth and then a severe beating at the hands of the ogres. You and I (Menthos pointed at Kessen) will sneak in and surprise them, when they realize they're under attack the two ogres will rush in and will run them over." Menthos offers

"Do you mean to kill them? I was under the impression we should get them to leave." Xanthos asked

"Do you speak goblin?" Menthos asked

"No, but that's hardly ...." Xanthos tries to reply

"Then we'll force them out, end of planning stage." Menthos interrupts

"Doopa smash green shorties into paste!" Doopa yelled 

The party got quiet as they thought for certain that Doopa's declaration would bring an alarm from the goblins. Fortunately they were too busy arguing to pay attention.

"What do you want us to do?" Xanthos asked regarding himself and Haimish

Looking down at Xanthos'  hooves and then back up at his face, Menthos replied "Stay quiet."

"I could sing a song? I know many, many wonderful songs. I bought the entire liner note collection to the They Are Giants greatest hits. Their exploration of guttural whistling is brilliant!" Haimish eagerly offers

Stunned confusion washes over the rest of the group. Menthos grabs Kessen by the shoulder and leads him down the steps. 

Sticking to the shadows created by the flickering cooking fire the goblins have erected in the center of the room. Two rabbits currently burn on spits set up over the fire. Kessen notes that the spits are constructed in a manner that would make them immovable so likely the rabbit was charred on one side and raw on the other. 

Three goblins stand on the far side of the fire, two of them are in each other's face, engaged in a heated argument, while a third goblin watches from about ten feet away, interjecting his own comments whenever the other two seem to calm down their emotions, which quickly gets them to escalate the disagreement again. The two men also note a door on the far southern corner which is currently closed.

Kessen crouches low and takes aim at the far goblin, shaking with excitement of the pre-battle, Kessen lets loose of the bowstring and his arrow flies into the ceiling a full fifteen feet above the goblin.

"@#%&!" Kessen utters as the surprise Menthos hoped for is shattered as he creeps along the wall to south and into that corner.

The goblins quickly end their discussion and shout out at the two intruders, just as Doopa and Turgar come barreling down the stairs and into the room. Teeth bare and weapons raised. Just as battle is about to ensue, a human's voice carries into the room from the stairwell.

_Oh, for sure_ 
_I just got a manicure_
_The sun I swear_
_Is bleaching out my gorgeous hair_
_2, 4, 6, more_
_There's twenty arrows in a score_
_Go, go. Fight, fight_
_Gee I hope I look alright_

_and repeats..._

Xanthos taps along to the catchy tune, providing a drumming beat for Haimish to sing along with. Meanwhile, below the song has incited a riot as the goblins charge into the offensive and cut deep wounds into Doopa and Turgar, while Haimish's song disrupts Kessen's ranged attacks and he sends two more arrows into he ceiling above the far goblin's head.

"Hey, they're only two feet tall, what are you aiming for up there?!" Menthos shouts out as he rushes past Kessen to flank one of the goblins.

The far goblin bolts and heads for the door, Kessen stands up from his shadowed position and races for the goblin. Too slow though as the goblin flings the door open and races down the hallway beyond. Kessen reaches the door and throws it open, but his human eyes perceive only blackness beyond, and the din of battle behind him prevents him from hearing the goblin's retreat as well.

Xanthos enters the fray, skipping along to Haimish's words of encouragement, and together with the two ogres and Menthos, manage to kill the remaining goblins.

"Whoo! We rock!" Haimish shouts

"What was that awful noise coming from your mouth?" Menthos demands

"What? Weren't you inspired?" Haimish asks

"No, I was nauseated." Menthos counters

"I felt a little more sure of myself. I feel as though your words helped." Turgar states

"Don't do it again." Menthos chastises

"What? That song fit better than a cat in a whorehouse. I didn't see nothing out of you that would lead to me to believe you could plan a two-day siege of my mother's linen drawer." Haimish argues

"Hey guys!" Kessen whistles "The third one got away, we should go chase it down before it alerts any more of them to our presence." 

"A wise and tactical man. Do you believe more exist beyond that door?" Xanthos inquires

"Goblins are like rats, there ain't never just one or three. There's bound to be hundreds down there, all of them breeding and performing ritualistic sacrifices of horses and gregarious woodland creatures." Kessen explains to Xanthos

"What? I had no idea these debased creatures were capable of such debauchery. Lead the way man, we must end this tonight!" Xanthos speaks

The party lines up at the door, the two ogres peering out into the darkness. Menthos taps Kessen on the shoulder.

"Nice BS job, I hope you're able to find the underground diabolical goblin lust cult that you convinced the centaur must be down here." Menthos comments.


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## Jon Potter

What's this? Another Hairy Minotaur story hour?

HM, where was my notification?


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## Hairy Minotaur

*Despot Ruins continued*

"I need some light up here." Kessen called back to the others

Turgar went back and retrieved a good sized burning piece of wood from the goblin's cooking fire. The ogre held it aloft, allowing Kessen to check the stone floor for recent goblin tracks.

"Oh a tracker. Several of my elders are trackers, my father in fact was a tracker. While I was always much more in tune with the natural living world around me, I could always see the need to track ones enemies threw non-natural means." Xanthos spoke excitedly

Kessen crouched low to the floor, they didn't go this way I'm certain. The human spoke pointing to a southern passage. Kessen stood about thirty fee into a long passageway that ended beyond any of the group's sight. 

"That leaves the stairs down over there, or down that long hallway there." Kessen said, pointing out the only other two remaining options.

"You sure he didn't passwall or teleport? Maybe he turned into a shadow? For all we know the was no third goblin." Menthos inquires

"Well, I think we should take the stairs, don't want things coming up behind us while we're fighting down that hallway." Haimish offers

"You don't take the stairs first! Everyone knows you take the stairs last, worse things are always found after you take the stairs." Menthos comments

"Doopa say we break stairs so goblins no use anymore." Doopa states

"What dungeoneering survival manual are you reading? They're goblins, there's no such thing as dire goblins, I could fling a booger at one and kill it." Kessen replies

"You should try that, you certainly can't do any worse than those arrows you fired as warning shots to the dead rabbits." Menthos counters

"Let's see you shoot a bow, here take mine if you think you're so good with one." Kessen argues

"People please, you guys fight like two ticks on a gray ooze. If you can't get along for your own greedy sake, then at least have the decency to get along so the rest of us can get paid." Haimish demands

This manages to calm the teifling and human down enough to discus tactics in a civilized manner. 

"I agree, it's best not to let them surprise from behind, I like the human's suggestion that we take the stairs first." Turgar agrees

"It's suicide people, death awaits us down there. There's no way we're ready to take on any challenge the lower levels may present to us." Menthos counters

"Again with this knowledge as if you've been here before, what are you basing your fanatical fear of stairs on?" Kessen inquires

"I've read extensively on the subject." Menthos stoically replies 

The group begins to head towards the stairs anyway.

"Wait I'll show you, see" Menthos digs in his backpack and pulls out a colorful book with leather string binding. The pages splayed out from repeated use.

"Let me see that." Kessen says snatching the book from the teifling's hands. "Wha...? A comic book? Order of the st.. ?" Menthos snatches the book back.

"You get all your knowledge of dungeoneering from a comic book? Look I like the comic too, but it's meant to be funny, not factual." Kessen states and then bursts into laughter

"May I?" Xanthos asks of Menthos

"No, it's mine, and after we all die down there, I'll be proven right." Menthos accuses

"Doopa think if we all die, goblins use book for wiping of rear." The ogre interjects

Down the stairs the party goes, when they reach the bottom, they are confronted with a "T" to the right the hallway goes ten feet and "T"'s again, to the left there is a room at a forty-five degree angle from where they stand at the bottom of the steps.

"Which way tracker?" Xanthos asks

Kessen kneels close to the floor and looks around for obvious sings of a goblin passing through recently.

"This way!" Kessen shouts as he points to the room

The party charges into the room and confronts a male and female goblin along with their two kids and pet badger. 

"Where's the diabolical lust sacrifice altar?" Menthos asks aloud, the goblins stand back in confusion, Kessen however understood the question was more for him than the goblins.

"Obviously it's not in this room." Kessen shoots back at Menthos

"Doopa smash!" The ogre charges and gets hit with two arrows fired from the goblin children, they shots bring the charging ogre to his knees and then he collapses fast forward into the floor.

Kessen moves to the right of the doorway and along the wall, he fires a return shot but it again glances off the wall behind the goblins, some eight feet above and behind them.

Turgar charges forward and swings over the head of the female goblin. The goblin's badger pet advances and attaches itself to Turgar's leg.

"Ah! get it off me!" Turgar reaches down to pry the little beast off and opens his head up for a crashing blow from the male goblin's mace. Turgar crumples to the floor unconscious.

"See! You See that!" Menthos shouts as he fires a shoot into the chest of the male goblin. The sucking chest wound gurgles with escaping gas from it's lung, but he creature does not drop.

Xanthos advances to the downed Doopa and administers some bandages and a soothing herbal salve. *twang* *whoosh* *thunk* 

"Ow! I've been shot! How rude of you, I was obviously not a threat!" Xanthos shouts in disbelief. *twang* *whoosh* *thunk* 

"Hey! knock it off!" Xanthos covers his head and tries to maneuver around so Doopa's prone body can offer some defense against the goblin kid's toy bows.

Haimish rears into song:

_K-I-L-L_ 
_Kill the goblins dead_
_K-I-L-L_
_Kill the goblins dead_

_come on sing it with me!_

The trueborn then rushes the female goblin and cuts deep with his longsword and then slams his shield into her head, breaking most if not all the bones in her face and she drops like a wet blanket.

Kessen finally gets his bearings and drops one of the goblin children, sensing the turning of the battle's tide, Xanthos charges the other goblin child and stomps a puddle of blood into it's chest with his hooves.

Menthos circles around the male goblin and using Haimish to flank him, takes out the goblin with a well placed blade between the shoulder blades. Haimish turns on the badger and unloads his frustration out on the little creature, killing it quickly.

"Why did you feel it necessary to kill the badger, he could have been released into the wild?" Xanthos asks

"Guilty by association." Menthos replies for the trueborn

The humans, load up the ogres on the back of Xanthos and they agree to exit the ruins and try again tomorrow.

After traveling for an hour, Menthos looks over to Haimish who's humming along as they walk. "If your songs are more like that, than like your first. I wouldn't mind more of them in the heat of battle." Menthos admits

"Certainly sir, like I said I do have the entire collection of... " Haimish starts

"Yes, yes. As you stated before." Menthos cuts him off

"Ha! another convert to the musical stylings of Haimish. In the morning I'll make you haggis, we'll bond like pipe smoke to a purple worm!" Haimish announces

"Uh, let's just stick with you singing while I'm chopping down some goblins." Menthos returns, then looks over at Kessen and holds up his book. "It was right" he mouths to the human. 

Kessen rolls his eyes and continues on.


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## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> What's this? Another Hairy Minotaur story hour?
> 
> HM, where was my notification?




Oh sorry, I added to my sig. I figured I would eventually add a link on the other story hour with my next post there. 

And to make this post topical I shall include the players races and classes below for you:

Menthos - Teifling Rogue/Warlock 
Haimish - Trueborn Human Bard 
Turgar - Ogre Dragon Shaman (died during battle for Omen)
Doopa - Ogre Barbarian
Kessen - Highlander Human Scout
Xanthos - Centuar Druid (died during battle for Omen)
Xanthos - Dawn Elf Shifter (Xanthos was reincarnated)
Eeyore - Aranea Ranger with white tiger companion (replaced Turgar)
Adukol - Human Sorcerer
Kourk - Human Cleric of Urian (Sky god)/Converted to Moradin dwarven god of the mountains
Dahlgren - Karsite Binder
Aust - Drow Assassin


All but Xanthos & Eeyore are using Dawnforge character creation rules (edit: Xanthos was reincarnated and took a Dawnforge race when he returned to life). Haimish swapped out Bardic Knowledge with Bardic Knack (per PHB II)


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## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Oh sorry, I added to my sig. I figured I would eventually add a link on the other story hour with my next post there.




No sweat! Just givin' you grief is all.

Are these the same group of players from your other story hour? I notice certain... similarities... between the personalities of some of the characters there and here.

And I'm completely unfamiliar with Dawnforge. Any chance for a sentence or two expalining what's diffent.


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## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> No sweat! Just givin' you grief is all.
> 
> Are these the same group of players from your other story hour? I notice certain... similarities... between the personalities of some of the characters there and here.
> 
> And I'm completely unfamiliar with Dawnforge. Any chance for a sentence or two expalining what's diffent.




Menthos is played by the guy who did Paquito
Haimish is played by the guy that did Korg
Turgar is played by the guy that did Finrod
Doopa is played by the guy that did Ratchet
Xanthos is a new guy
Kessen is a new guy

None of the rest of the other story hour are in this game. 

Dawnforge has Orcs, Minotaurs, Lizardmen, Ogres, Yuan-ti, Dopplegangers, Elves, Humans, Halflings, Gnomes, and Dwarves as playable base races. The races gain abilites from 1-10 level as well as some stat bumps. By the time they're 10th level the book says to give them challenges of ECL +2 their level. I like throwing hard things at them so this helps them out in that regards, plus it makes for hardier PCs. Plus most of the "big" races like Minotaurs and Ogres don't get to choose lagre size until 6th level so they're medium while fighting the kobolds, goblins, and orcs that permeate the lower levels. 

This game is much more political/religious in nature and I'm using the Affiliation rules form the PHB II, and 3 characters currently have an affiliation score (one of them with a not so nice group who I plan on seeing how far the PC will go with their plot.)

I'm using Wilderlands as the campaign backdrop and Highcastle is The City State of the Invincible Overlord with some plot changes, the deities are all from The Book of the Righteous, and since I know you have that book I will say that Shalimyr, Maal, Tinel, Carnak, and Kador have all figured into the plot in the game thus far. And yes, I am using the Kador "secret" so as not to draw suspicion from the player who has affiliation with this church. I bet if you look over the character list, the aforementioned PC will become obvious.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Menthos is played by the guy who did Paquito
> Haimish is played by the guy that did Korg
> Turgar is played by the guy that did Finrod
> Doopa is played by the guy that did Ratchet
> Xanthos is a new guy
> Kessen is a new guy




Shows what I know! I was hearing Paquito in Haimish and Finrod in Menthos.

Dawnforge sounds interesting and you know I like BotR. I already happily noted the name-dropping you did in the first post. I'm really looking forward to how this progresses.


----------



## spacehulkster

(one of them with a not so nice group who I plan on seeing how far the PC will go with their plot.)  

humm.......I wonder which one of us it is? 

(And yes, I am using the Kador "secret" so as not to draw suspicion from the player who has affiliation with this church. I bet if you look over the character list, the aforementioned PC will become obvious.)

I knew it!  FIRE, FIRE, hurrmph, ah ah FIRE!

(Are these the same group of players from your other story hour? I notice certain... similarities... between the personalities of some of the characters there and here.)

It's like being trapped in an eternal champion novel.


----------



## Jon Potter

spacehulkster said:
			
		

> (And yes, I am using the Kador "secret" so as not to draw suspicion from the player who has affiliation with this church. I bet if you look over the character list, the aforementioned PC will become obvious.)
> 
> I knew it!  FIRE, FIRE, hurrmph, ah ah FIRE!




Uh oh! I hope that my curiosity has not inadvertently spoiled a campaign surprise!!! If it's the one I'm thinking of it's a pretty fun one, so I *really* hope not!



> (Are these the same group of players from your other story hour? I notice certain... similarities... between the personalities of some of the characters there and here.)
> 
> It's like being trapped in an eternal champion novel.




Which is really not a bad thing at all, when you come to think of it.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Return to the Despot Ruins*

In the morning after Doopa and Turgar were returned to full vigor by Xanthos, the group plods back out to the ruins. This time Kessen stops every few feet to pluck some small plant or flower from the ground. 

"You don't plan on smoking that do you?" Menthos inquired about the plants and herbs in Kessen's hands

"No, these are an insurance policy." Kessen replies

"Good, because my brother smoked, and it got obsessive at some points. Couldn't see out of the fog bank that surrounded him and his pipe" Menthos offers

"Fascinating." Kessen starts "Your story both bores and annoys me, I do believe that is the first time that's ever happened to me." 

Stunned, Menthos keeps his mouth shut until they reach the ruins.

"Did you know that next Thursday is Kilted Yak Day? Tis a fine tradition in my family. My father dresses the best yak, I am only sorry I will be unable to participate this year." Haimish bemoans

"You are an odd human." Xanthos replies

"I know what it is like to be away from home, try to think about other things like, treasure and adding to your personal hoard, fame and adding great tales of deeds done by your hand. These are things Turgar will complete before returning to see the sunrise ignite the eastern face of the Cloudwalls." Turgar says proudly

"That is dumb, Sunfist tribe take good side of mountains, leave Kneegnash clan to live next to goblin scum. Doopa will return home and will has to pass through Sunfist tribe to get there, Doopa will enjoy watching you catch pheasant with your hands." The other ogre boasts

"Your tribe will be extinct before you ever find your way home again. Loutish brutes, how's that rock farming going for you?" Turgar replies trying to suppress a building laughter

"Ha, you stupid ogre. Doopa know you can't grow rocks in farms." Doopa retorts as he laughs and walks ahead of the group.


_My father wore and heavy frown_
_The day the naked yak came to town_
_The folk were scared, panic ensued
Listen close this part is true
My father stood up to face the yak
He pulled the kilt off of his back
The beast it reared and charged my pop
My dad refused to put up with it's slop
He grabbed the kilt and held it so
The yak ran through it don't you know
The beast was clothed and it started to bay
The moon it shone bright that day
And blinded me to my dismay
Never will I forget the man
Who fed ten families with a yak ham.

Oh it's Kilted Yak Day
Shave Yak and bring him to play
Dress him up all nice and frilly
Maybe you to can come all silly_

"Please stop, I thought we agreed you'd only do that while I was chopping down goblins." Menthos yells, covering his ears

"Don't you feel better protected now? Words have power you know, I know how to master that power and put it to use." Haimish beams

"Do you know any humans are weak pathetic leeching maggots who deserve to pickle in their own urine songs?" Menthos answers as he heads down the stairs and back into the ruins

"That man has serious anger issues, seems to me he's got his sword sheathed in his cat lager." Haimish observes

The party moves down and notes that the poorly built cooking pit is cold and appears to have remained unmolested through the night. They exit through the only door and look once again down the hallway.

"Which way, down again?" Kessen asks pointing to the stairs

"Are you mad man! We nearly died down there! I told you the book is never wrong." Menthos raves

"You're impossible to work with, do want you want to do, I'm going to go back downstairs." Kessen says, leaving the party at the doorway as he heads for the stairs.

"Shh, you hear that?" Xanthos asks

oooooaaaarrrrrr oooohhhhmmmm iiirrrrlllll blechle! Ack! 

"Something's down there." Xanthos states pointing down the hallway

"Gee, you think? Could be it's that altar of diabolical goblin lust you've been seeking." Menthos offers

"We should check it out then." Xanthos comments and prances down the hallway

"Uh, this seems like a bad idea. I remember when my folks split up, man we were fit to be lathered then. Nothings worse than knowing your mind and heart are square dancing to bugbear sculptures." Haimish points out

Kessen relents and follows Xanthos and the rest of the party down the hallway. The moans and sounds of vomiting get louder and more slurred, after close to eighty feet they reach a large carved out area that contains a lone goblin, drinking heavily out of a large clay jug.

The party approaches the drunk goblin, who upon seeing the group breaks out into a fit of demented laughter.

"Poopah send for hu-mans to kill Gorga. Ha! Gorga send Firt to Poopah for evers!" The goblin gets out

"What is your name?" Kessen annunciates heavily

"Gorga, Gorga miss Firt. Hu-man bring Firt?" Inquires the goblin

"No. What is your name!" Kessen goes louder and slower, then gets shoved out of the way by Menthos

"Move hairless baboon, you obviously have had no training in intimidation and interrogation tactics." Menthos comments

Menthos yanks up the goblin from his prone position by his ear. He then drags the creature kicking and screaming to the hallway. Menthos points at the end of the hallway the party has yet to traverse.

"What there?!" Menthos asks

Scared, the small goblin wets all over himself and Menthos as well.

"Ha! Serves you right you sadist." Kessen remarks

"Teifling need watch out for other end now, Doopa know all to well about that." The ogre speaks up

"That's because on your side of the mountains, that's a staple food source." Turgar snipes at Doopa

Menthos slaps around the drunk and barely conscious goblin and points again towards the as yet unexplored part of the hallway, "What there?!"

"Raiders." The goblin manages to get out 

Doopa shoves Menthos away from the goblin, "Doopa do this right way." He then faces the goblin and licks his lips, opens his mouth and bares his teeth. 

"Gobbo want seasoned before Doopa cook?" The ogre asks

The goblin screams in terror and tries to back away from the ogre, but Doopa's massive hands press the goblin to the floor.

Turgar shoves Doopa off the frightened creature.

"You're supposed to get information from it, not kill it." Turgar says

Doopa then tackles Turgar and the two ogres begin to scuffle across the stone floor.

The goblin sees it's chance at freedom and turns towards the exit and charges face first into Haimish's shield, knocking itself out cold.

A splash of cold water awakens Gorga from his alcohol assisted slumber. Haimish has bound the goblin as well as gagged it. 

"Gorga help Haimish. Haimish let Gorga go." Haimish states

The goblin looks around at the loud human, the abusive tiefling, the half-horse/half-human monstrosity, two bloodied and beaten ogres, and then back to Haimish. Gorga nods his head in agreement.

"Good show!" Haimish replies and removes the gag from Gorga's mouth, "Now what is that way?" Haimish says pointing down the hallway.

"Raiders." Gorga replies

"Raiders, like you? More goblins?" Haimish asks

Gorga nods in agreement.

"How many?" Haimish inquires

Gorga studies his hands and then moves to his toes and then back to his hands and then seems to get lost and restarts. Haimish waves him off from trying again.

"More than eight." Haimish says to the party

"What about down the stairs?" Haimish asks next

Gorga begins to tear up, "Poopah and Firt. Firt tell Gorga leave! Gorga take much food. Poopah now live with Firt, Gorga want Firt!" The goblin breaks down and begins sobbing.

"What about back that way?" Haimish asks point to the southern passage across from the stairs near the entrance of this hallway.

"Dead things that walk." Gorga answers

"Undead that way." Haimish says pointing at the passage

"Hmm, that's a lot of goblins to take on in that room. Undead could be troublesome, looks like it's back downstairs." Kessen announces

All but Menthos agree, Menthos however agrees to change his mind on one condition, "I want the little green man next to me."

"I told him he'd be as free as feathers in the soap." Haimish replies

"What? Never mind that, I'm not going to let him free until it's safe enough for us that if he goes running off to find some of his brethren, it'll be too late to matter for them." Menthos argues

"Well, I can't argue with that logic." Haimish replies to Menthos, then turns back to Gorga "Soon, I let you go." Then re-gags Gorga, and the party heads back to the stairs.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*So that's where baby goblins come from.*

The group heads back down the stairs, Kessen scouts ahead of the party and sticks his head through the "T" to the right. Peering to the north he sees a dead end with a small drainage gate near the bottom of the wall, to the south he sees a long passageway extending into the darkness beyond his human vision. Listen he hears no sound from either direction.

"As far as I can tell, it looks clear this way." Kessen reports

"Which is what fifteen feet? Go running up and down that hallway screaming for your clothes and weapons to be returned, if nothing attacks you, we'll know it's safe." Menthos counters

"What's down that hallway Gorga?" Haimish inquires from the gagged goblin

The bard removes the gag and Gorga spits out "Party, Gorga no allowed to eat. Gorga take wine anyway and sit alone." 

"Party? They got food?" Doopa asks

Gorga nods and Doopa points towards the hallway, "Doopa go that way, Doopa need food badly"

"Let's make sure there's nothing behind us first. What's down there?" Haimish asks Gorga pointing down the left corridor at the bottom of the stairs, the first room contained the goblins and badger they fought yesterday, but there was also a door at the end of the corridor.

"Firt." Gorga says solemnly

"That way." Kessen and Menthos says simultaneously

The party reaches the door and Xanthos and Kessen both press their ears to the door. They seem to remain there longer than what would indicate no sound.

"What do you hear?" Haimish asks

"Grunting, moaning, and crying." Xanthos reports

"Hmm, that would seem odd. Better check it out." Haimish answers

Doopa moves up to take lead with Kessen, and the ogre shoves open the door to reveal a dimly lit room. Opposite of the doorway is a crudely constructed altar to some goblin god. Laid out on the floor in front of the idol are food stuffs along with burning candles and a couple of sacrificed rats which are still bleeding.

The noises that the centaur and scout heard are coming from two goblins in the center of the room attempting to increase the numbers in their clan through breeding. 

"Ugh, I'm going to be sick." Kessen states as he backs away from the room and falls to his knees trying to breath slowly and counteract the urge to regurgitate.

"What's going on?" Xanthos inquires as he moves u to take Kessen's spot

"Looks like we found your diabolical lust altar of sacrifice after all." Menthos tells him

Xanthos views the room and thinks for a moment, "Yes, appears you are correct. I shall handle this." The centaur moves up to the rutting goblins and takes his time to _coup d' grace _ both of the preoccupied goblins. The rest of the party enters as Xanthos throws their ratty clothes on top of the bodies.

Menthos enters to investigate the altar along with Doopa, as Menthos passes the dead goblins, Gorga calls out, "Firt!" 

Gorga twists and rolls against his bonds, the movement causes Menthos to crash to the floor as Gorga attempts to escape his bonds, "Firt!" he calls out again.

Turgar comes over and slams the head of Gorga against the stone floor, knocking him unconscious.

"Doopa think this goblin fertility god, Doopa see this before in homeland." The barbarian announces

"What? Are you sure?" Xanthos asks

"Of course he's sure, his familiy uses the same one in their cave." Turgar answers

"Doopa not live in cave." Doopa replies

"Wait! I just killed two creatures doing what nature intended? What have I done?" Xanthos bemoans

"Nature certainly did not intend for that." Menthos says standing up again and pointing at the goblins, "I would go with this is a diabolical lust cult, whatever helps your conscience get through it."

"You're certainly a heartless bastard." Kessen remarks

"So, he's half-ass. What did you expect?" Menthos counters

"Now you're just mincing words." Kessen answers as he waves off the teifling

"At least I'm mincing something, your strategy seems to be to yell a lot in hopes people will ignore your glorious whiffs from your ranged attacks." Menthos responds

"People, focus on the gold at the end of the path. This beating on the astral dream isn't going to get us there." Haimish speaks amid confused faces

"I must bury them, to atone for my actions." Xanthos states

"Bury them in your rear, we don't have time for you to bury them, nor the tools to do so in here." Menthos tells him

Xanthos drapes both naked goblins across his horse back and exits the room. Haimish kicks over the ratty straw mat the goblins were on and locates some silver and copper pieces. The bard pockets them and heads out of the room with the rest of the party.

The group heads back to the "T" Kessen looked down earlier, they take the south passage and come to a "Y" to the southeast the passage extends through darkness even for those with darkvision, the southwest passage goes about twenty feet and then turns to the west.

Smells of cooked meat and spilled ale waft from the southeast passage, amidst the faint sound of music and voices.

"That way!" Doopa announces and charges down the hallway.

The rest of the group struggles to keep up with the lumbering ogre, whose strides rival that of a giant's. Doopa reaches the room where the smells seem to be emanating from and he eagerly points to the door while wiping the drool from his mouth. 

"Doopa break door down, kill all goblins in room, is good plan!" Doopa offers

"Let me check to see how many there are in there first, okay?" Kessen asks

Doopa thinks it over for a moment and decides that would take too long and shakes his head "no".

Haimish produces one of the copper pieces he found under the straw mat and holds it in front of Doopa.

"Oh, a shiny." Doopa remarks and takes the copper from Haimish

"I'm a quick study." Haimish replies.

Kessen smiles and opens the door slightly to peer inside. He spots at least two dozen goblins, mostly females and children, eating and drinking away the day inside the room.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Kessen smiles and opens the door slightly to peer inside. He spots at least two dozen goblins, mostly females and children, eating and drinking away the day inside the room.





Oh dear. I predict this not ending well for the women and children.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Pay Day!*

Kessen picks out a seated and drunk male goblin on the far side of the room, he takes careful aim and unleashes the arrow. It flies true and punctures the goblin's throat. The creature's head snaps back and it plummets out of it's seat and crashes to the floor in a heap. Kessen quickly shuts the door and races to the other side of the hallway opposite the door, so that he can fire at goblins that exit the room.

The rest of the party flanks both sides of the corridor at the end of the small hallway that leads to the room, to pick off any goblins that try to make it to Kessen or flee into the passageway. The party waits, seconds turn to minutes, the sounds to not abate from the room and no one exits.

Kessen walks back to the door and slowly opening it, peers inside to see that the dead goblin has unfazed the room. Kessen picks out an overweight goblin that's dancing in a circle near the center of the room. His arrow flies into he side of the goblin's head and it topples over, crashing through a wooden bench. Still the party rages on.

"I don't get it. These are either the stupidest creatures on the planet, or they're in a deep drunken stupor." Kessen espouses

"Maybe they're in a trance-like state from all the lust demons they summoned?" Menthos postulates

"If they are engaged in a natural activity, we should leave them be." Xanthos speaks up

"Look who's talking, you're half horse. I don't want to know what kind of breeding went on there." Menthos replies

"Doopa think if gobbos not watching for attack, that gobbo problem." The ogres observes

"The idiot is right, I say we strike while the goblins are preoccupied and then kill them when they're disorganized and confused from the initial attack." Turgar agrees

The group nods in agreement, and back away from the door to allow Doopa to move up to it. He and Turgar grip their weapons tightly in anticipation of the impeding assault. Haimish breaks into a fighting song.

_Give up now, you're all dead
Thought you'd invited a couple friends
Angel of death, showed up instead
Surrender now, or lose your head_


"Try not to get spit on me." Turgar asks Doopa 

"Kneegnash!" Doopa yells as he kicks in the wooden door, ripping the door from the frame in the process, splinters rain down upon the nearest goblins followed by a small cloud of dust partially obscuring the frames of two ogres as they enter the room swinging their weapons from side to side as if they were harvesting grain.

Kessen follows, and lines himself up against the right corner then fires his bow at anything smaller than his waist that moves. Haimish enters to the left and charges into the room, alternately bashing goblins with his shield and cutting them down with his sword. Menthos follows Haimish into the room and cuts down any goblins left standing after Haimish hits them. 

Quickly the battle is won, the group totals up four male goblins, mostly crippled or infirm. Followed by eighteen females and twelve children. Doopa snatches the cooking hunk of meat from the spit in the back of the room and begins to rip off chunks of flesh with his teeth.

"That went well." Turgar claims

"Aye, we should do that to the next room." Haimish replies

And so it was done, three more times in fact. The group wiped out every living thing on this level of the ruins. After ransacking each room they came to two options remaining.

"Back upstairs to face The Raiders? Or down this passage here?" Kessen asks

"Passage, stairs are always the wrong choice." Menthos states 

The party heads down the passageway, for miles and miles they walk. Three hours later they emerge in the twilight sky of a setting sun.

"Hmm, I wonder if anyone knows this entrance exists?" Kessen inquired

"Well, the rocks are certainly stacked up here to keep this entrance hidden. I wonder if you can see it from the hill above us?" Haimish asks

Turgar and Kessen push their way through the stacked rocks partially blocking the exit and then climb a small hill that the tunnel exits from. They report the entrance is hidden from view while standing on the hill. 

"I think we're about four hours from town, I can see the Dearthwood to the north and the Ragaloon estuary to the east." Kessen observes

The party decides to re-stack the rocks and head back through the tunnel to the ruins. Once back, they head upstairs looking for a fight, only to find the place deserted.

"Hey Gorga, so much for your Raiders." Menthos states

"Well, they're either out on a hunting party, or they wisely fled after finding the rest of their tribe slaughtered below." Kessen offers

"Or that." Menthos adds, accepting Kessen's ideas

"Gorga not want to live, hu-man kill all tribe. Even Firt." The goblin howls

"Take it easy, Firt didn't want you anyway. I just saved you from years of broken marriage, unwanted kids that aren't even yours, and an alimony payment that'll drive you to smoke." Menthos tries to reason with Gorga

"Doopa think Firt leave you for next goblin she see. Better she dead now than after she take all your stuff." The ogre chimes in

"You two certainly have a warped sense of honor, and a pessimistic view o life. Gorga, Firt was no longer yours. I'm going to set you free, go make a new tribe of goblins with those that don't leave their brethren behind." Haimish states and cuts Gorga free

The goblin bolts for the exit and flees.

"Don't forget to write and let us know where you moved too!" Menthos yells

"That was unexpected, I would have thought you'd strike him down on the way out." Xanthos says to the teifling

"Why? Any tribe he starts is bound to be doomed, either internally, or soon after I arrive with a sharp weapon." Menthos replies

"Well, let's go get paid!" Kessen shouts and races up the stairs to the night air. Followed quickly by the rest of the group

The trip back to Highcastle went quick and soon the group was upon Lord Palmere's estate and at his doorstep, just to the southeast of Highcastle.

Lord Palmere excitedly pays them one-hundred gold apiece, "And here's an invitation to the party I'm throwing in twelve days hence. If you plan on coming, I'd advise on a bath first." Lord Palmere states

The group collects their pay and heads back into Highcastle. Haimish and Menthos both grab a High times in Highcastle newspaper. Turgar and Kessen discovered on the long tunnel trip that they both live in the same area. Kessen is from the Plain of Cairns and Turgar's tribe overlooks the Plains, they both head to the nearest bar to drink and tell tales of home.

Menthos looks up from the paper and spots an open bar. "Horned Devil" My kind of place, the teifling heads in and picks a seat and then watches as Kessen and Turgar bring back a platter of pitchers to the table next to him. Turgar waves, and Kessen merely looks disgusted.

Haimish then enters and takes a seat at the bar, unfolds his paper on the table and orders a mead. Doopa and Xanthos enter last, Doopa because he was hungry and alone on the street, Xanthos out of curiosity.

Menthos chats up the bar maid and learns that the Temple of Kador captured a spy in their temple, "Supposed t'be some high flying girl from the Church of Tinel, they're gonna sacrifice her tomorrow. Me an my guy got tickets."

Haimish notes on the front page of the paper a story about disappearances along Shady Street after midnight. Lone travelers have gone missing and the local constables are at a loss to explain it.

Xanthos notes how sparse the bar seems, there's a middle-aged gnome scouring over blueprints and maps in the front booth by the exit, and there's a well dressed man sitting at the bar next to Haimish. Which takes Xanthos aback as he hadn't seen that man enter or even sit down. Xanthos saunters up to the bar next to Haimish, who is carrying on a lively conversation with the well-to-do gentleman.


----------



## the Jester

So far this is a very fun story hour!  Thanks!


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

the Jester said:
			
		

> So far this is a very fun story hour!  Thanks!




Thank you. The group is lots of fun and makes my job easy, I only have to focus on killing them.   

Since I know not everyone has The Book of the Righteous, I wanted to post some the deities and their main portfolios so readers won't be confused once the names of churches and temples start to get thrown around as their relationships come to the forefront of the plots in the coming weeks.

Kador - God of fire
Shalimyr - God of water
Maal - God of justice (also controls all criminal proceedings in Highcastle, more LN than what the book has)
Terak - God of valor
Tinel - God of magic, knowledge, and secrets
Rontra - God of earth and fertility
Morwyn - God of healing (has monopoly on healing items in Highcastle)
Carnak - God of slaughter and war (think CE)
Thellos - God of self-indulgence (think NE)
Mormekar - God or death and rebirth
Urian - God of air and storms 
Zheenkeef - God of thieves
Naryne - God of nobility

There are other gods in the book, but I don't know if they will ever play a part in any of the upcoming plots. The merchant lords whorship the almighty gold coin, so there is no god of trade or wealth. You'll also notice that 2 of the 3 evil alignments are represented, the third (LE) does have a deity (and if you have BotR you know who it is) but the party has yet to find out which church that is so I've left that bit of info off the list.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Tavern talk*

"I'm Haimish, happy to meet your acquaintance." The bard says vigorously shaking the hand of the gentleman seated next to him

"I am Lord De' Lite, you look to have the make of an adventurer. What do you do for a living?" 

"Well, truth be told. I've only just begun my adventuring career, got rid of some vermin. I'm currently vexing over how best to put it to pen. I plan on making it a play after I'm famous." Haimish answers

"Lofty goals there sir, it heartens me so to hear the youth of today with career goals of their own. For whom did you get rid of the vermin for?"

"It was a private matter, likely the individual was too embarrassed." Haimish chose his words carefully

"And yet you still keep his confidence? Impressive indeed, and what great adventure lies next upon the horizon for young Haimish?" 

"I don't know, I'm sure something will come up, though this time I'd like it if it presented itself prior to me going broke." Haimish replied

"Really? I may have just the sort of capital gain you're looking for."

"You do? Well I'd love to hear it." Haimish answered excitedly

"This fist of glass is a replica of an item called the Soul Gem, it currently resides under the School of Ancient Knowledge. You'd like to get it for me wouldn't you?" *

"I would totally be up for that! I'll go now and get it for you, don't go anywhere." Haimish gushed

"Ah, the impetuous and full of life." Lord De' Lite grabbed Haimish's arm and guided him back to his seat, "You've not heard of the school then?" A head shake from Haimish confirmed Lord De' Lite's suspicion

"Young Haimish, there's plots to be planned and subterfuge to be laid. One does not go into the dark room without knowing what is inside, lest one end up worse for the wear." 

"Planning, subterfuge. Got it." Haimish eagerly replied

Xanthos arrived next to Haimish, "Hello gentlemen, this is the first time I've been in one of your drinking establishments. Might someone suggest a good beginner drink, I'd hate to lose my wits so soon." Xanthos asked

"Here, this'll cure you of your fly problem." The barkeep said noting Xanthos' tail swatting away a few flies.

"What is the name of this concoction?" Xanthos inquired

"Troll drool over rocks." The barkeep replies

Xanthos studied the thick liquid, it reminded him more of pus than of drool. The smell nearly knocked him off his four feet before he even tried to drink it.

"Hey Xanthos! I'm going to get this awesome gem for this guy. It's going to be sweet! I'm totally getting it." Haimish espoused

Xanthos spewed his drink all over Haimish's face, it was unclear whether it was because of the drink or Haimish's words.

"You sound extremely happy to do this, you must be getting good riches from this endeavor?" Xanthos asks of Haimish and then makes eye contact with Lord De' Lite, "I am Xanthos of the Silverwood Valley."

"Riches? That's not necessary, I'm doing this non gratis. I really want to help Lord De' Lite out, I don't need his money." Haimish answers

Something inside Xanthos told him Haimish was out of sorts,  "Free? How very unhuman-like of you."

"Yes, I'm going to break into the .." Haimish is cut off by Lord De'  Lite

"Now let's not go about telling everyone the plan, that would make your job extremely difficult, and no you're not doing this for free. Here's fifteen hundred gold crowns for you to use in the planning of your mission only." Lord De' Lite hands over the good sized bag of coins and Haimish spies numerous gems inside of De'  Lite's cloak.

"Wow, I'm so focused on this. It's amazing what motivation feels like!" Haimish states

"Well gentlemen, it's getting late. Haimish should you have need of me before you present me with the item. You know how to reach me." Lord De' Lite says as he gets up from his barstool

Xanthos takes a quick scan of the bar where Lord De' Lite was seated and catches a glimpse of the paper's headline, "I read it's not safe out at night around here, perhaps you'd like some company for your walk home, or perhaps I can get a carriage for you?" 

"Thank you my good man, but that won't be necessary. Years of training abroad have taught me how to defend myself." 

"And where was that?" Xanthos pries

Lord De' Lite was getting visibly irritated with Xanthos now, "Never you mind my half-stallion, these things always have a way of working themselves out." Lord De' Lite winks at Xanthos and exits the building, Xanthos quickly heads for the door but the man is nowhere to be found in the street.

Bored, Menthos watches as Turgar and Kessen, and Haimish and Xanthos are engaged in their own conversations. Not wanting to converse with the retarded, Menthos ignores Doopa and quietly walks over to the man studying the blueprints and maps at the booth near the front door.

Menthos looks over one map in particular when the candle light of recognition flickers on and he sees the ruins he just cleared out displayed out before him.

The man senses Menthos' curiosity and quickly folds up his maps, "Ahem, something I can help you with?" 

"I don't know, looks like your map was incomplete." Menthos answers

"And how would a low-life teifling know anything of that?" The man replies

"Well crap, if you're going to insult me like that, then I won't tell you where the secret entrance to those ruins you've got on the map there is located, get you right past the goblins living there." Menthos retorts

"What? You know nothing." The man dismisses Menthos

Menthos then begins to recite the dimensions and placement of each of the rooms in the ruins, the man's eyes swell with anticipation as he unfolds that map and realizes that Menthos speaks the truth. Menthos however neglects to include the location of the secret tunnel.

"Please sir, I had no idea. I've been searching most of my adult life for an item I believe to be located there. I was just planning my foray. You were speaking of a secret entrance?" The man pleads

"Um, no not me, you must have me mistaken for someone else." Menthos answers

"But, you just told me there was a secret entrance not on my map, It bypasses the goblins living there." The man begs

"Sir, I do believe you need to rest. You're addled mind has attributed statements to me that simply aren't fact." Menthos states

"I'll pay you! five hundred gold!" The man offers

"Sorry can't help you." Menthos states and begins to walk away from the man

"One thousand!" The man shouts

Menthos shrugs his shoulders and sits down at Doopa's table. The man begins shouting obscenities towards Menthos and must be physically removed from the tavern.

"What yelling man problem?" Doopa asks Menthos

"He's a jerk." Menthos answers



*Haimish missed a save, I won't say which so as to keep you intrigued until most is revealed soon.


----------



## pogre

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Shows what I know! I was hearing Paquito in Haimish and Finrod in Menthos.




Me too. I thought I had this group pegged...


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Casing the joint*

"So let me understand this, you offered to steal a magic item from a sage or wizard's school for free?" Kessen pries

"Lord De' Lite believes in my ability, he told me he has no doubts I'll be able to get inside and get the gem, and it's not for free, he gave fifteen hundred gold to do it." Haimish answers

"I don't like this, it doesn't feel on the up and up if you know what I mean." Kessen answers

"Do you know anything about this school? Is it like a museum, can you just walk in and steal it?" Turgar inquires

"You would seem an odd choice to perform such a task, One would think that Menthos would be the one to play rogue." Xanthos wonders aloud

"Where is the teifling anyway, I want to tell him all about me new adventure." Haimish asks

"He's upstairs with one of the wenches getting personal attention." Kessen says disgustingly

"Well, Lord De' Lite did say I needed to plan and strategize. Maybe you guys could help me get the gem? He didn't say I could get help, that might help me better spend my money wisely." Haimish concludes

"How are you supposed to know which gem it is?" Kessen asks

"Lord De' Lite said I'd know it when I see it, it's purple and it is suspended in mid air in a room all by itself." Haimish replies

Menthos descends the stairs from the second floor and looks amazed that the group is still within the tavern.

"Don't you guys have better things to do?" Menthos exasperates

"Hey Menthos! Lord De' Lite said I could get him this Soul Gem from the School of Ancient Knowledge, he believed in my abilities so much that I'm going to do it!" Haimish excitedly blurts out

Menthos stands for a minute in awe of the sheer stupidity of Haimish before speaking, "I can't believe you weren't killed as a child." 

"Do you want to help me get the gem?" Haimish almost begs as he asks

"What? I just got here (Highcastle) why would I want to be killed already. My name is Menthos Lyptus, not Mentally Unstable." Menthos shouts before shaking his head and heading for the exit of the tavern. He stops up short just before reaching the door however.

"Wait, if there's one magical item hanging around in there, there's bound to be more. Count me in." Menthos demands

"Count you in what? I've already pegged you a quack, what other subset of depravity do you wish to belong to as well?" Kessen remarks

"Stop labeling me with your hackneyed phrases, Ham-like is bad enough at it." Menthos answers

"I think what the highlander is saying, is that you can't be trusted." Turgar interjects

"That may be so, but I'm motivated now, and just ask the lady passed out upstairs what I'm capable of when motivated." Menthos replies

"That's not the kind of motivation that's going to get us inside the School." Kessen denounces

"It might, are there girls there? Who else among you has had training in the hiding and sneaky way of life? No one huh? Looks like you need me." Menthos observes

*sigh* "Looks like the demon speaks the truth, I certainly am not adept at moving inconspicuously through a crowd." Xanthos admits

The group eyes each other wearily, did they really just agree to do another job? Were they going to have to work together again?

"Doopa, give group hug." The ogre envelopes the rest of the group in his massive arms and squeezes the breath out of the humans.

The group divvies up scouting duties, Kessen goes to get general exterior layout of the school as well as number and type of guards. Xanthos goes off to practice shifting his shape to one than will blend in more with the populace of Highcastle. Turgar and Doopa are told to stay away so as not to draw suspicion from the school, while ogres are an uncommon sight in Highcastle, it is an unique day that one would go in or out of the School of Ancient Knowledge. Haimish goes shopping for info around the bars and taverns that surround the school, hoping to find someone with any knowledge of the place.

"What are you doing?" Kessen asks Menthos

"I've got to see somebody about a training opportunity." Menthos answers

"Training for what? You told us you were all about the sneaking and the silent treatment. What could you possibly need training for?" Kessen inquires

"Don't worry, go collect your info. I'll meet you back at the Horned Devil at the agreed to time." Menthos replies and leaves Kessen standing

Kessen gets directions to the school, and once arriving can't believe he bothered to ask for directions. The building takes up an entire city block. Two stories tall and all brick the structure looks more like a prison than a school. No windows are apparent on the building, if not for the explicit directions and the runes inset along the side, Kessen would've though this an enormous block of marble cast down from the heavens.

Kessen spots the small entryway, four steps lead up to a polished marble set of double doors. Flanking the doors are beautiful life-like statues of gargoyles. Kessen turns right and heads around the building counter-clockwise. In the middle of the north wall, Kessen finds a narrow alley that dead ends at what he suspects is the center of the structure. He spies two doors, both shut near the end of the alley. 

Continuing his trek, Kessen rounds the corner to get a look at the western side. This side contains no features, save for the runes prevalent on all sides thus far, Kessen looks up and spots the row of gargoyle statues lining the roof of the building and wonders why anyone would waste their talents on sculptures for a building that's not meant to be gawked at.

Turning the corner once more, Kessen faces the southern side of the building. This side as an imposing structure set into the southern face of the building, The Temple of the Spider. Built using stone instead of marble, the temple looks as if the School of Ancient Knowledge is enveloping the building like a glacier around a mountain. The temple too has no exterior windows, however their are no gargoyles or any other facade enhancers around the temple.

Kessen decides to watch the temple entrance for a while to see if he can spot a priest or devout worshiper in order to question them about the school. Kessen waits for two hours with no sign of anyone coming or going. A little frustrated, Kessen walks up to the entrance of the temple to peer inside. The entrance is cloaked in cobwebs, some distance behind the cobwebs, Kessen can make out a small dim light illuminating the gigantic image of a spider body with the form of a female where the head of the spider should be. Similar to aranea that he had seen in the Plains of Cairns.

Unnerved, Kessen walks off without going inside. He wonders why such an eerie structure would be allowed to remain attached like a symbiote to the School of Ancient Knowledge. 

Haimish finds a good sized bar just north of the school called "The Scholar's Inn" he takes up a seat at the bar and hopes that someone as interesting as Lord De' Lite would arrive to answer his many questions on the School of Ancient Knowledge. He lucks out and talks with a few people who have some information on the school.

Haimish learns that the school was founded to give those with the arcane touch a place to study and learn without fear of loosing a sleep spell on the general populace, over time however the school began to charge a tuition. Small at first the tuition grew as the years went on until finally only the elite and wealthy could afford to either pay the tuition or had a way to blackmail/bribe their children's way in. Now a days you had to be a senator's child or a merchant's child to even hope to gain admittance. 

Haimish learns that only one teacher is allowed to leave the school grounds to retrieve supplies or buy provisions. He usually does so once every other month and did so about two weeks ago. Haimish was unable to obtain a name of this individual however. 

Tired from a day that extended into the evening and was still extending through the following day, Haimish decided to head back to the "Horned Devil" to meet up with the rest of the group and go over notes, or find a room and sleep. He was unsure which would come first.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Something gross, this way comes*

"Stupid Tehas, never gave good directions." Menthos muttered to himself. It took him nearly an hour to locate the particular antique and fetish shop he was looking for. 

The building looked as if it had collapsed when Menthos walked past it the first five times, upon closer inspection the sixth time Menthos saw that the building appeared to be shoddily constructed and remembered that his brother had told him that the building looked like dung from the outside but got interesting once you got inside.

Menthos reached for the front door and discovered that it was only on one of it's hinges. The door swung awkwardly open and creaked like a tomb door as it finished it's swing. A heavy dose of incense doused Menthos, almost gagging him in the process. A small voice called from somewhere in the back of the store.

"Be right with you, feel free to look around though." 

Menthos' eyes adjusted quickly to the low-light in the store and he made his way in. Shelves lined the walls to either side of the doorway, filled with organs and fetuses of creatures he'd never seen before. Moving further in, the teifling came upon displays of wickedly curved knives and daggers some appeared to be thousands of years old. Then came the hanging racks of dried pipeweed, bundled together in stalks of five plants per bundle. Some from places he'd never heard of, or couldn't pronounce. Looking back at the front of the store, Menthos was impressed to find that the rotten and broken down look on the outside appeared to be airtight and sealed from the inside.

Turning to his left, Menthos came to face an upright desiccated humanoid. Taken aback a bit, it wasn't until Menthos' eyes dragged down to the things arms and legs that he saw something which made him wish he hadn't turned around. It was missing all of it's fingers and toes, and parts of each foot and the left hand was gone as well. A sign was posted next to it's left hip.

_"Mummy Pipeweed. 5,000gc/gram"_

"Ah one of our most decadent items." The voice startled Menthos who instinctively reached for his weapon.

"Tsk, if you're going to be jumpy like that, you'd be better off if you left, it doesn't get any more sedated around the next corner."

Menthos turned to face the small figure, a gnome with black tattooed runes on it's bald head and a forked beard peered solemnly back up at Menthos, "I'd be less jumpy if you'd quick sneaking up on your customers."

"That's your perception, I tend to believe if you don't see me, then that's your problem." The gnome commented

"Do people smoke this?" Menthos asked pointing at the mummy

"I'm sure some have, others use it for more necromantic applications. Still I can't beat the markup on it, so it stays out here. Someday it'll go as an impulse buy to fancy wizard or some such." The gnome answered

"Really? Good luck with that." Menthos replied

"Yes, you however have the look of a man in search of something specific. Perhaps one of these Orichalan ritualistic vertebras removers?" The gnome held up a wicked looking levered spoon device that looked like something a demon would use to clip it's nails with.

"I'll pass on that today. I'm looking for some information, no that's not exactly it, I'm looking for a patron." Menthos answers

"Ah, a spellcaster you are. I have many fine homunculus creations I could sell you, or perhaps you were looking for something in the naughty tinker bell range?" The gnome suggests

"Hey, whatever you're into is okay with me, I'm not here to judge." Menthos replies

Menthos' remark brings a frown to the gnome's face, "Well, appears there is nothing I have that you want."

"Wrong, there is something you have that I need. I know you have it, I just wish we'd not have to do this dance around the subject before you get a clue and we move on to step two." Menthos answers

"Ah, you want the Duergar Ale Chute! I'll get it for you." The gnome states and vanishes before Menthos' eyes.

a few moments later, the gnome rematerializes next to Menthos holding funnel with a long ribbed worm-like thing attached to the drain point.

"What the hell is that?" Menthos asks

"This is what you need. A Duergar Ale Chute! I attached the mohrg's tongue myself. See the cartilage bypasses the gag reflex so that the ale can go straight from mug to stomach without one having to swallow. Plus it's a little permeable so that you can still taste the ale on the way down, but you won't have to waste all that time gulping. I will warn you though, quite a few people have drowned using this item. Although from what I'm told they died with a smile o their face in ale heaven." The gnome tells Menthos

"That's tempting, if it only came with a loaded hand crossbow so you could shoot yourself after sticking that in your mouth, I'd be sold on it." Menthos retorts, the gnome holds up a finger as if to say he'd be right back with the hand crossbow. 

"Stop! I don't want any of these items!" Menthos shouts, "I need a patron, I want to become a warlock!" 

"Sonny, your in the wrong town then. It's all about spells and books, and more spells here. I don't know what you expected to find in my antique store that would lead you to that path." The gnome answers

"Listen twerp." Menthos says grabbing the gnome by the collar of his shirt, "I know you do this, my brother visited you months ago and you set him up. I've got a job to do in the School of Ancient Knowledge, and I think it's in both our interests if we cut with the BS and get down to the you contacting another plane." Menthos demands

The gnome eyes Menthos for what seems to drag on for minutes, appearing to size up the mettle of man that Menthos is. 

*sigh* "What patron do you wish me to call for you?" The gnomes acquiesces

"This one." Menthos replies, handing the gnome a slip of papyrus with one name on it.

"Pfftt, surely you jest? This is the weakest of all the patrons. Undoubtedly you meant someone more along the lines of Grazz't? Skarn barely registers as an entity and is so unreliable as to not warrant the effort." The gnome replies

"No thank you, I'd rather keep my own soul if you don't mind. I like having free will, it keeps me from wanting to come back here and burn this place to the ground." Menthos responds

"Well, I'm not doing this for free, so it looks like you're going to be purchasing a Duergar Ale Chute today." The gnome states and begins to light some red and black candles at the rear of the building.

"What? It was free earlier this year? And what am I going to do with that thing?" Menthos argues

"Times change, constables up their bribe prices, and the Temple of Tinel keeps wanting to take a look at my store." The gnome states

"Fine what's the cost and I'll just pay you that in gold and we'll call it a day, I don't want that thing!" Menthos pleads

"Oh but, I think you'll need to show you had a great shopping experience when you leave my store. After hours of shopping, do you think the Tinels watching outside will believe you browsed half the day away?" The gnome asks

"Fine, but can it be something else?" Menthos asked, understanding the gnome's meaning but not wanting to walk out with the chute.

"No, because it just so happens this item costs 171 gold crowns." The gnome replies

"So?" Menthos spoke before his brain caught up, Menthos then remember that was the exact contents within his money pouch, "That's a good trick you have there."

"No trick at all, merely business." The gnome answers and finishes lighting the candles.

Four hours later a weary Menthos exits the broken building carrying a Duergar Ale Chute and wielding an internal fire.

"Ew, gross. What in blazes is that disgusting thing?" Kessen inquires

"It's a motivation tool for horses. Helps with suppositories and stomach pumping. It's quite amazing actually." Menthos answers, Xanthos nearly leaps from the table.

"Calm down, I said horses, not half-asses." Menthos tells Xanthos

"Why on earth would you need such a thing to break into the School of Ancient Knowledge?" Haimish inquires

"I heard they were into some pretty freaky stuff." Menthos answers to a stunned crowd.

Kessen then tells the party about the back alley and the Temple of the Spider on the south side. Turgar and Doopa admit to sleeping for the past six hours, doing exactly what the party hoped they'd do. Xanthos then shifts into the form of a young human boy and sits back down at the table between Haimish and Kessen.

"Wow, I can't tell it's fake at all. Good job." Kessen praises

"I agree, looks more natural than a swan on Tuesday." Haimish agrees

"Centaur look puny now." Doopa argues

"Couldn't you have turned into a voluptuous woman instead?" Menthos comments

"I am a human male of twelve summers, I have been led to believe this is standard for your their species." Xanthos argues

"Yeah, but you look all ratty and dirty. I wouldn't let you in unless you were a hot woman, and that just makes you look plain." Menthos offers his opinion

"That is the point, I plan on appealing to their sense of mercy and goodwill. I will knock on the door and plead to gain work to clean some part of their building, once entry has been gained, I shall seek to mistakenly search the lower levels for this gem Haimish needs." Xanthos explains

"Well I'd think you'd get more work as a woman." Menthos disagrees

"There's something in there." Turgar, who had been staring at Menthos' odd contraption the whole time, states

Confused, Menthos peers inside the funnel and spies a golden ring suck near the top of the mohrg attachment. Reaching his hand in, Menthos plucks out the ring. Turning it over in his hand, he can feel the magic course through the small trinket. 

"You probably just broke the thing." Kessen states

"We'll see." Menthos replies

"Well, what do we want to do the rest of today?" Turgar asks

"Get some sleep, is my vote." Haimish answers

"Sounds good." *whistle* Menthos waves over a serving wench, "bring up four pitchers of ale and two pitchers of mead to room number twelve, and tell your boss you'll likely be detained for a while." Menthos grabs the Duergar Ale Chute and heads to his room upstairs.

"I say we ditch him now." Turgar comments

"No, we need somebody to blame when this thing goes wrong." Kessen answers

"I don't think I can wait that long." Turgar replies

"Guys, let us focus on the task at hand, think of the references we'll get if we can appease a lord of De' Lite's stature? Menthos may be crass, but he's good with a flank and apparently the only one with thieving skills." Haimish counters, Kessen and Xanthos nod and they head up to their rooms, leaving Doopa and Turgar. Alone, in a bar, where they serve alcohol, and they already dislike each other....


----------



## Bryon_Soulweaver

Fighting ogres? Sounds interesting.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Shifty*

Before retiring for the evening, Haimish pays for a message to be delivered to the Horned Devil asking that Lord De' Lite visit Haimish at the inn where he was staying. Haimish drifts off into a welcome dream of haggis and ale. 

The dream goes dark however and then the scenery is ripped away to reveal a solitary Haimish alone at a table with a meal of maggots and blood. Reeling, Haimish shoves himself away from the table and spins to com face to face with lord De' Lite.

"Bad dream?" Lord De' Lite asks

"Would appear so, yeah." Haimish answers

"What is it that you needed to see me about?"

"Oh, I need some assistance on getting inside the School of Ancient Knowledge. What supplies should I get, what door should I use?" Haimish inquires

"A bribe tends to go a long ways, these days only senator's sons and merchant families gain access to the building."

"I will need to become one of those then. What about service entrances or sewer access?" Haimish asks

"I'm sure the School has prepared for such an eventuality, thievery is not a long lived occupation and stealing from those who can scry is asking for a short life span." 

"Well, I think we're planning on going in real soon, I know this centaur guy who can shapeshift like a blanket in a rainstorm. He's going to try and get in to get a look around. I found some ogre muscle too." Haimish explains

"Well, I must be going. Parties to attend, people to see." 

"What party is that?" Haimish asks

"Well, I just came from the Kador roast of Selonsia a Tinel priestess of minor import. That was quite the party, some good barbs thrown in there." 

"What about these disappearances along Shady Street, do you know anything about those?" Haimish 

"I don't believe this is twenty questions with Lord De' Lite time, perhaps you should focus more on getting the gem and less on talking to strangers."

"I was merely looking for a way to show the school that they can trust us, I figure solving those disappearances would lead to some fame that might lower the bribe cost to get into the school." Haimish replies

"Only if the cause is worthy of mage attention will it even register with them, since they never leave the structure." 

"Oh, well it was worth a shot." Haimish states

"Yes, well don't call for me again, unless you have the gem. I need to plan for Lord Palmere's party in two weeks. I shall be constantly busy until then, hopefully it will not take you that long to retrieve the item for me."

With that Lord De' Lite disappears amidst a loud crash of furniture from below. Still groggy from a lack of sleep, Haimish stumbles out of bed and opens the door. Sounds of a melee ring out from below. Shaking the cobwebs, Haimish races back to retrieve his belongings and heads back down stairs, Kessen follows right behind him.

"Sounds like we're under attack." Kessen states

"Sounds like a treant giving birth with all the cracking wood." Haimish counters

They both reach the bottom of the stairs and take in a battered and broken bar area, a downed troll recuperates on the floor next to the bar, a throng of constables mill about the rest of the lower floor of the inn. Turgar and Doopa and both kneeling in front of four large ogres who have the duo grappled while a halfling works with a rope to secure Turgar and Doopa's hands behind their backs.

"Hey they're with those two, kick them out as well!" The barkeep shouts to the constables as Haimish and Kessen both realize the barkeep is referring to them, "Where's your drinking buddy, the reddish guy with horns on his head?"

Kessen points upstairs while Haimish just shrugs, "Come with us, we have a few questions." a constable commands while grasping Haimish's arm and leading him away from the stairs. 

"How do you know the two ogres over there?" a guard presses Haimish

"Um, we were part of the same cleaning crew." Haimish responds

"And what were you doing while this was occurring?" 

"While what was occurring, I was asleep upstairs? I heard a crash and came to investigate." Haimish replies

"How long have you known the suspects?" The guards asks pointing at Turgar and Doopa

"Couple days." Haimish answers

"Couple days? Awfully close for a couple of days, they're down here abusing customers while you're conveniently upstairs sleeping." The constable says accusingly

"I don't know anything else, I wish I was full of information for you, but you've completely covered the whole of my abandoned duck with these questions." Haimish replies\

"Hey!" The constable shouts while poking Haimish in the shoulder, "Don't get smart with me, you're already under suspicion of obstructing justice. You're borderline traitorous, don't go there with me." 

"Shouldn't you go down and see what's going on at least?" The wench asks Menthos 

"Why, it's quieted down now. I'm sssure everythingss under control." Menthos slurs

"I should probably go back to work now, Tirn is going to be mad enough as it is that I've been up here for two hours." The wench replies

"Well, I ain't helpinss you find yer clothess. Menthos gets out of bed and walks over to the wench's side of the bed, he grabs a filled water basin along the way.

"Okay, dunk my head in the water then slap me." Menthos commands

The wench at first was a little nervous but got into the swing of things quickly. After eight dunkings and ten slaps, Menthos waved her to stop.

"Alright, I'm sober enough. Hand me that chute thing behind the pillow. Menthos then gets dressed and heads towards the stairs. He gets to the top landing and hears the interrogation occurring downstairs and sees the prone troll by the bar, thinking it best not to go down there now, Menthos heads back into his room and opens the window to peer onto the street below. Seeing no one milling around within forty yards up and down the back alley. Menthos swing both legs over the ledge.

"Where are you going?" The wench asks

"I'm going to piss off authority." Menthos answers and leaps down the ten feet to the alley below. 

"I'm working tomorrow night too!" The wench yells out after Menthos.

The tiefling was already in full sprint as he raced through the alley and then up Caravan street and over to the boarding stables.

*whistle* "Hey Xanadu, I need your help." Menthos whispers after the loud whistle

"Me name is Xanthos." The centaur reminds him

"Close enough, the group's in trouble back at the inn. I have a plan." Menthos states

"What has transpired?" Xanthos inquires as he gets up from his sleeping position.

"Don't know and don't care, I'll tell you my plan along the way." Menthos climbs on the back of Xanthos and the centaur spirits them away back to the inn.

"Officer, I believe this boy has information vital to your case!" Menthos shouts as he bull rushes his way past a few guards and into the inn.

"What? We have all the facts we need." A constable replies

"I think you need to hear this." Menthos states

"Well, out with it boy." 

"Sir, I was walking past the inn when I heard the fighting. I cracked the door and saw that green monster there fighting with those two monsters over there." Xanthos relays, "then from out of the green monster's mouth a huge worm came out and the pink monsters there yelled Morg! and the other pink monster cut off out the worm and threw it outside. Then the two pink monsters beat up the green monster."

"That's quite the story lad, but I think it best you ran along home and let the adults handle it from here." The constable said, not believing the little boy after taking a statement from the barkeep and the troll.

"Well, okay but you take this I don't want it." Xanthos states and throws down the Duergar Ale Chute minus the funnel

A startled gasp goes up from the assembled constables, the lead investigator eyes the tongue wearily then looks back at the troll.

"That not Murk's" The troll claims

The constable looks back at the young boy shivering with fear, then back at the troll, then over to Turgar and Doopa.

"Boy lie! Murk kill you!" The troll lunges only to be de-armed by the blade of the constable. The rest of the constables join in the beat down and soon the troll will be recovering for weeks. 

The constables drag out the unconscious troll and release Turgar and Doopa with a "Thank you citizen". The lead investigator hands Xanthos a gold crown and rubs his head, "good work lad, we got the bad guy." and leaves.

Turgar and Doopa take a moment to think about restarting the fight that got the troll knocked unconscious to begin with, but decide better of it and just thank Menthos and Xanthos.

Haimish and Kessen realize it was now going to be much harder to get rid of Menthos now, as the tiefling suffering from an extreme hangover, plops down in a still intact chair by the door, and orders a pitcher of water.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> "Well, okay but you take this I don't want it." Xanthos states and throws down the Duergar Ale Chute minus the funnel




That's just beautiful! What a great use for such an oddball item.

I won't ask where you came up with the idea for that one, HM.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> I won't ask where you came up with the idea for that one, HM.




That's the same thing the player said.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*With this plot seed, I set my mind in motion.*

The group packs up and heads to the next open inn, not caring what it was called or how bad it smelled in there. Xanthos heads back to the stables and the rest of the party splits two rooms with the ogres separated.

Morning comes, followed by breakfast, soon lunchtime approaches and finally the group awakes to begin their day. They head into the common room and order the roasted duck and tubers meal. Haimish excitedly tells of his meeting with Lord De' Lite last night. 

Menthos pays for a current newspaper and again the lead story is another disappearance on Shady street. Menthos hands over the paper to Haimish once he's through.

"You know I thought that if we could impress the School of Ancient Knowledge of our abilities then maybe we or I could gain an audience with one of the teachers. I was thinking of finding out about these disappearances along Shady Street." Haimish relates

"I thought Lord De' Lite told you unless is magical in nature, then they wouldn't care?" Kessen asks

"Yes, yes he did. However I figure with a great liar and schemer like Menthos here. Even if the disappearances are nothing more than drunks who fall through an open sewer grate, the great Menthos could tell the constables that there was a dimensional vortex of magic that sucked them through. Surely that'll get their interest?" Haimish explains.

"I do not know about this lying business to the city watch. One too many times and you will surely get burned." Xanthos comments

"Maybe, but if he can take a ginormous tape worm and make the watch think it's some kind of body part removed by a mutated troll, then he could get away with telling the watch about imaginary vortexes of vacuum magic." Haimish explains

"That plan sucks." Menthos adds, "Or does it blow? I never get a vacuum right. Why not go to the watch now and tell this tale?"

"Because we need to end it, otherwise it keeps happening and then someone else solves it and it turns out to be drunken beggars falling through open sewer grates." Kessen replies

"Doopa not care, as long as Doopa hit something. Doopa is in." The ogre states

"I think we should scope out the street, look for obvious places where things might happen." Kessen offers

"Won't that be hard with all the Shade? I mean you're only a human and clearly not equipped to spot things in dimly lit places." Menthos inquires

"Keep it up jack-ass and I'll riddle your back with shaft protrusions." Kessen replies

"I don't do riddles or enigmas, which explains why I'm not married. But did it ever occur to you that they named it Shady Street for a reason?" Menthos asks

"Maybe it's a reverse nickname? You how they call orcs pretty or teiflings committed." Haimish interjects

"Or bards talented." Menthos finishes

"Suuuure, I've not heard of that one though." Haimish replies

"Well, I'm going to go scout the street." Kessen states and collects his belongings and heads for the door.

Doopa, Haimish and Xanthos follow the highlander out the door, leaving Turgar and Menthos at the table. Turgar stares a hole through Menthos' chest.

"What? I'm not a troll. You're not going to fight me now are you? And here I though you were the smart one." Menthos says, Turgar states a few seconds longer and then gets up to follow the rest of the group out the door.

Kessen and Co. arrive at Shady Street, immediately they see the immenseness of their task, the street is full of private residences and abandoned houses. Only one structure is out of place on the street, the Temple of Shalimyr. It's coral built facade stands out amidst the broken and run down nature of the street. 

"Seems odd they would put a temple hundreds of feet from any measurable source of water." Kessen observes

"Maybe the point is that you can be knee deep in a river, yet still be dying of thirst?" Menthos answers, having followed soon after Turgar left.

The group turns to face the tiefling, mostly with confused looks upon their faces, save for Haimish, "Yeah, I get what you're saying. They chose this spot to be close to the effervescent well of hope that springs eternal."

Kessen turns to Haimish, "Oh no, it's contagious." 

"I wonder why, if their is a sanctuary visibly present on this street, would so many people go missing? I would tend to think they would reach the Temple at some point." Xanthos postulates

"Unless the temple is the one doing the kidnapping." Turgar replies

"But that's so obvious as to make no sense. Why do that if you're going to be the first and most prominent suspect?" Haimish answers

With no clear solution to that question the groups splits up, Xanthos transforms into a house cat and goes searching for a good place to hide that gives full view of the temple's entrance. Kessen walked the street mentally marking which houses were abandoned and of those which seemed structurally unsound. Turgar and Doopa were told to be on the lookout for anyone suspicious that seemed to be taking too much interest in what the rest of the party was doing. However both ogres were more interested in glaring at each other than watching anyone else. Menthos was told to stay out of the way, so the tiefling walked to the south end of the street and around the corner to the East, disappearing for hours.

When the sun had sunk low enough that the shadows from the buildings on the West side of the street completely shrouded the street, the party called off the scouting and met up for dinner to discus strategic options for the evening.

"I think I'll gain access to the roof of the abandoned build right across the street from the temple and wait there." Kessen said

"Doopa, Turgar, and I are going to parade up and down the street individually in hopes they try and grab one of us." Haimish relates

"I will be concealed in a small niche I found across from the temple on the side street the runs by the front of it." Xanthos stated

"What time we doing this?" Menthos asked

"Midnight." Kessen answered

"Nah, not good for me, I got a date with the tavern wench at the Horned Devil, can we make it for two in the morning?" Menthos asks

"No, all the disappearances happen shortly after midnight, according to the paper." Kessen relates, "I say go do want you want, then you won't be able to screw it up for the rest of us."

"I just might do that, thanks for giving me a clear conscience on this, I was worried you guys would die without me there, but it looks like the boy scout has given me the night off." Menthos states with smiles.

"On second thought, you're coming. I don't want you lose in the city without supervision." Kessen replies

"Super" Menthos sarcastically says under his breath

The party finishes dinner and plans to meet at Shady Street by eleven that evening.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*God of watery eyes?*

The rest of the day flies by with each person doing a little sightseeing and supply shopping. Kessen spends most of his time on the north side of the city and locates a bard's college that he makes a mental note to tell Haimish about. 

The eleventh hour soon arrives and the party, minus Menthos, arrive just outside the Horned Devil. 

"Looks like they did a blue herring of a clean-up job." Haimish notes

The others agree and note that other than the color of the new stain on the bar, you really couldn't tell it wasn't there yesterday. 

"Appears Menthos heeded your suggestion." Xanthos comments

"Yeah, well he'd only slow us down or spend the whole night making sarcastic wise-cracks while the rest of us did all the work." Kessen answers

The group walks away to the east, towards Shady Street. Under a watchful eye, two stories above them.

"Come back to bed, I have to start my shift in an hour." a sleepy female voice calls out

 Menthos looks up at the moon and then back down at the party as they reach the intersection with Shady Street a mere forty feet east of the Horned Devil, "Yeah, I got time." 

Kessen goes over the positions of the players in their scripted parts for the evening. Doopa and Haimish will walk up and down the street together while Turgar walks alone in the opposite direction, so that the three man will cross paths just south of the Temple of Shalimyr. Xanthos shifts into the form of a tabby and runs off to the hiding spot he found earlier, across the street from the temple. Kessen finds the abandoned house he'd marked earlier with a few leaves positioned to point at the house.

As midnight approaches, Doopa begins to walk to the south from the north end of the street, while Turgar and Haimish walk from the south end and go north. The whole of the street is two-hundred and forty feet long. Kessen reaches the top of the abandoned building and crouches below the roof's edge trying to stay in the most shadow while still being able to view the front of the temple. 

As midnight arrives, four robed and armed priests exit the temple of Shalimyr and appear to loiter on the front steps of the temple. Doopa and Haimish slow down as they see the acolytes exit and move their cloaks away from their weapons for easy access. Turgar's view is blocked by the temple itself and so not seeing the acolytes, he maintains his pace. 

Kessen draws his bow out quietly and creeps along the front of the building, his shoulder brushes against a brick and the sound of stone moving against stone, brings the highlander to a halt. Feeling with his hands in the dark Kessen finds the loose brick along with a small handle with which to pull it out of the wall. Kessen removes the brick and three others around it all with this handle. Peering out of the newly created opening, Kessen can clearly see the whole of the temple along with the guards. He lays nearly prone, raising his body just enough to get the arrowhead centered on a guard, and he waits for their move.

Turgar passes the temple and movement catches his eye as he is startled to see the four priests milling about in front of the temple. Turgar keeps his pace though as his body goes on high alert, waiting for the attack from behind as he passes the temple. The attack never comes, and Turgar moves along and passes Doopa and Haimish further south than Kessen wanted. The three men pass in complete darkness forty feet south of the temple. Kessen cursed his luck wondering why Haimish and Doopa had slowed, but being human all he could see clearly was near the temple and the light that it's burning candles gave off. He could see all four priests, but no one else until they pass in front of the temple. Only the sound of footsteps gave him the comfort of knowing the trio still walked the street.

Xanthos too braced himself to charge when he saw Turgar pass the temple, the delay in the attack was curious to the centaur. Turgar appeared to not care about the priests and yet they did not attack him. Xanthos wished for a better view of the area and made a mental note to study an owl before next sunset. An animal such as that would be a great benefit at night.

The sound of grunting and someone climbing up the back wall of the building alerted Kessen to the approach of someone else. Thinking it to be Menthos and wanting to teach him a lesson, Kessen backs away from the murder hole and crouches in the far corner of the front of the building. He takes aim at the slowly rising figure, a smile crosses his lips as he imagines Menthos' reaction to the warning shot. The face of the intruder appears in the moonlight and Kessen hesitates as it is not Menthos. Soon a holy symbols emerges as well, and Kessen realizes it's a priest of Shalimyr that has joined him. 

The priest pushes his way to the roof and quickly advances to the murder hole. The priest appears confused with why the murder hole is uncovered, but shrugs his shoulders and sits down to look out over the same area Kessen was watching. The situation had not gotten dire for Kessen, with no way to quietly tell the others about what was going on, and no way to see what was transpiring down below.

Doopa and Haimish reached the temple and one of the priests calls out to them.

"Ho there! Tis good to see travelers in pairs, this area be quite dangerous after the moon rises."

Haimish runs though responses in his head and throws out the only one that he practiced regularly, "Shary, me an me buddee are go'in hoom. Tanks doe." 

Doopa stops and looks around, disturbed by Haimish's response, he grabs his weapon ready to strike down the caster that turned Haimish into a drunk, because Doopa had not seen the human drink all night.

"Whoa there fella. You best be putting that away. I wouldn't want you to not make it home."

"Human not know where Doopa live, Doopa can go home whenever Doopa wants." Doopa argues

"Well, your actions speak as a man who wants to fight, and we're normally a peace sailing people, but we're more than capable of defending our sacred ground."

"Nah, he's juss jumpee. We donna mean no harm. Weel be on our way." Haimish says trying to calm Doopa down

"Why human talk funny? Where wizard that did this at? Doopa will smash!" Doopa shouts as he crashes his massive club on the sidewalk next to the temple.

Both Kessen and Turgar heard Doopa's shouting. Turgar turned back and began to run towards the temple. Kessen waited and decided to see what the priest with him was going to do.

"Your friend there is drunk, there is no sorcery afoot. Perhaps you'd like to sleep it off inside the temple? It would be much safer than trying to get home. You're in no condition to defend yourself meaning your ogre pal would be solo trying to fight off any attackers."

Haimish thought it over and wondered what the rest of the party was doing. Concerned that once he gets inside he'd be bum rushed, yet they really had no proof as of yet. Besides Turgar and Kessen were still watching for trouble. Haimish relented and allowed the priests to take him inside the temple followed by an ever vigil Doopa who smashed a candle after backing into it and it burned his back.

Turgar raced back to the temple to find Doopa and Haimish gone and only two priests outside the temple.

"Looking for someone ogre?"

"Um, no. Just getting in some exercise." Turgar replied

"Really? 'Cause it looked to me like you were chasing down a mark. Thought you could get an easy score with a drunk human and his concerned friend." a cat's meow echoed over the street as a tabby came out from under a porch while the priest spoke

"No, I was merely walking." Turgar answered

"I don't think so pal, you walked by here earlier, then after the drunk guy and his buddy pass, you come running back. You look guilty in my eyes, perhaps there is something you wish to confess?" The priest accuses and whistles, bringing six other priests out from the temple. The slowly advancing cat quickly turns and runs back to it's hiding spot

"I think I'll be on my way thank you." Turgar responds and quickly heads north

"Yeah, you do that, and I don't want to see you around this street again ogre!" The priest yells 

Xanthos breathes a sigh of relief as Turgar escapes, he considers shifting back to his true form but decides on trying to get a better view of inside the temple and what if anything was going on with Haimish. Xanthos creeps up to the temple steps and peers inside to see Haimish lying down on a cot with Doopa standing over him. Footsteps coming up behind him however, causes Xanthos to skitter away back underneath the porch again.

Kessen watches as the priest in front of him shifts and raises his hands as if to cast a spell. Unsure of what was transpiring down below, Kessen decides to act now and rushes the priest. The startled man loses his spell as Kessen grabs his feet and lifts him over the edge of the roof. The priest falls twenty feet to the ground below, and staggers to his feet. He limps across the street as two of the acolytes laugh at the fallen man's apparent lack of coordination.

Two constables smirk as well as they pass by the temple, as they watch the injured priest be carried into the temple. The constables and  remaining priests eye each other suspiciously until the constables move out of sight. 

Down the street cloaked in shadow Menthos too is intrigued by the events, he quietly approaches the temple and quickly gets the full attention of the four priests standing there.

"Hail stranger, what brings you out on this fine evening?" 

"I was making sure my friend made it home, he was really drunk and left while I was paying the tab." Menthos replies

"Describe this friend of yours."

Menthos gives an exact description of Haimish to the priest.

"Yes, we met such an individual. He is sleeping off his inebriation, would you like to take him home, he arrived with an ogre friend."

"He's sleeping? Well, then I'll let him rest. Keep an eye on that ogre though, he's had trouble with kleptomania before." Menthos replies and heads off to the north.

Doopa suddenly becomes aware of a few more eyes staring at him, "Doopa not like this place." He whispers to Haimish 

"Good, then you'll keep a good eye about you while I inflate the dream cloud." Haimish answers and drifts off to sleep.

Menthos wastes no time however in heading off to the Temple of Kador the god of fire, he figures if the temple of the water god is up to something, maybe the temple of the fire god would want to know about it. Even though he had no proof of anything, a little chaos never hurt anyone.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Even though he had no proof of anything, a little chaos never hurt anyone.




Ahh... the PC motto for many a game.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*I got a bad desire*

Menthos arrives at the Temple of Kador just after two in the morning. Their symbol of a great burning tree illuminates the entire street approaching the temple in a fiery glow of red and orange, no doubt annoying their sleeping neighbors.

Menthos walks in and is met by a red robed priest.

"Hello traveler, come to pray for the cleansing fire of Kador to wash over you?" 

"No thanks, I just had a good tongue lashing. I'm wondering about this temple's relationship with the water people, the Shalimyrs." Menthos asks

"We have no direct dealings with that faith, there tends to be quite a bit of steam let off when you mix us with them."

"Ha, ha, ha. Human humor is excruciatingly grating, please don't quit your day job." Menthos responds

"Yes, well you are the one seeking assistance, it was merely an attempt at an ice-breaker."

"What is that more fire humor? Look, I think the Shalimyrians are kidnapping people along Shady Street. Have you heard about the disappearances?" Menthos inquires

"Only what I've read, their temple lies far to the south near the sewer drainage pipes. Perhaps the disappearances were merely initiations into their public works programs?"

"This facade of mockingness is annoying me to no end. Do you want my information or not." Menthos demands

"Your information is most welcome, please continue. My name is Helle and I am a Pyromancer of the First Order, welcome to the Temple of Kador." Helle extends his hand to Menthos

Menthos considers the offer for a moment then shakes the priest's hand, "Are all you guys this egotistical?"

"Ego has nothing to do with it, when you know you worship the greatest power, all other faiths are mere sacrifices waiting to happen." Helle replies

"Yeah, I head about your little party the other night. What kind of gate did you take in?" Menthos asks

"Our roasts are filled with much rejoicing and cooked foods. I assure you any monetary gain was completely charitable." Helle replies

Menthos' eyes take in the altar area beyond the chapel, built like a huge pyre, the stone has a  blackened and burnt look and even a faint scent of spent coals is picked up by Menthos' nose. Just below the candles along the chapel wall figures move back and forth. The light making it hard for Menthos to pick out any features, too bright for darkvision due to the proximity of the candlelight, yet too dark beyond the candles for normal vision. Menthos thought he could see teifling features on some of the figures, or at least small horns atop their heads. 

"Busy place." Menthos states

"Yes, fire is in constant motion. To cease it's move is to become like the cold ice of the Shalimyrs, or to wink out of existence from the breath of Urian. Our initiates learn to appreciate fire for more than warmth and light, bathing in fire is the finest example of freeing your soul." Helle relates

Menthos watched as the red marbleling of the ceiling appeared to dance and move to the flickering of candle light from below.

"Kador smiles on your visit, I believe your coming here will prove to be fortuitous for both of us." Helle states as he too looks up at the ceiling.

"That's a nifty optical illusion you've got there, what kind of stone is that?" Menthos inquires

"It is called Fyroche, it is solid fire from the home of Kador. Blessed to this temple by the cleanser himself." Helle answers

"Shouldn't it be unbearably hot in here then?" Menthos questions

"One of his many miracles." Helle explains

"Yes, I'm sure it is. Hey I've got this burning sensation, maybe you could take a look at that, or give me some cleanser to wash the affected area?" Menthos asks

"Step up to the pyre and ask Kador for guidance." Helle instructs

"Guidance to what? I found your dayglow temple, it's not like it's hard to spot the light." Menthos replies incredulously

Helle just smiles back, unnerving the teifling and causing Menthos to back away from him, "Look, I don't care if you do anything about the kidnappings or not. I've got a couple of people I knew inside their temple right now getting you more info."

"What is it you want?" Helle asks

"I want the kidnappings to stop, I want a hot little teifling wench, and I want lots of gold. What can you do for me?" Menthos responds

"I sense an odd fire within you, you recently entered into a bargain which grants you limitless power. I'm afraid all I could offer you is a chance to hone that into something that would grant you the things you seek. Kador's light can shine though even the most desolate shadows and his heat can be felt through the most passionate of touches." Helle answers

"What was that last part again? I don't need to be tied down with tithes and showing up to weenie roasts with my marshmallows and chocolate. I just wanted to give you guys a heads up about the water people." Menthos answers and begins to walk out.

"Thank you for visiting today, I'm sure our paths shall burn again soon." Helle answers

Menthos hadn't noticed the feeling of weighed down with an oppressive sensation until he was outside of the temple. Shaking off the feeling, we returned to Shady Street to collect Haimish and Doopa.

Along the way he thought over the conversation he just had, _that was certainly an unlikable guy. I don't think he answered any of my questions._

The more Menthos thought about the conversation though, the more his skin became flushed and he head felt fevered. He felt as though he had swallowed a torch and it's fire was licking the insides of his ribcage. Menthos turned his thoughts to the Temple of Shalimyr and the sensations ceased. Intrigued, Menthos wondered what exactly had been going on inside the Temple of Kador.

Menthos arrives at the Temple of Shalimyr and proceeds up the few steps to the outside landing, he passes two acolytes as he makes his way up the steps. The acolytes each sniff the air as Menthos passes and draw their maces.

"Halt! You shall go no further Kador deceiver. Return to your own temple!" The acolytes shout, the yell alerts two other acolytes on the opposite side of the landing, as well as a handful of priests inside the temple as well.

Menthos comes to a stop and is immediately cut-off by a dozen priests who bar his entry to the temple, "Whoa guys, I just gave down the street. I'm only here to collect my friends and begone." 

"I assure you, no friends of yours reside within these walls, go back to your debased cult and fry your tongue there." comes the reply

Confused, but no match for over a dozen armed priests, Menthos retreats back down the steps and crosses the street. He looks back at the temple and watches as none of the acolytes have turned their eyes from him. 

"Ack! what did you step in?" Kessen gags out as he nudges Menthos' shoulder

"What are you talking about?" Menthos asks

"You smell like super cinnamon, it burns my nose and lungs just standing near you and what took you so long to get here anyway?" Kessen asks backing away form Menthos

Realizing that the Shalimyr guards must have smelled what Kessen smells, but not Menthos was unable to detect anything with his own nose, intrigued him even more about his visit to the Kador temple.

"I don't know what it was, I can't smell it. Apparently it annoys the Shalimyr priests to no end. You'll have to go inside and get Haimish and Doopa." Menthos answers

"Alright, but what if there's a fight? Where are you going to be, and where's Turgar?" Kessen asks

"Oh, I think there will be a fight, I just hope we're not here when it happens." Menthos replies.

Kessen curses the teifling and shakes his head as he crosses the street towards the Temple of Shalimyr.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*To new heights*

Kessen approaches the temple and the priests shift so as to block his entrance as well.

"Is there a problem?" Kessen inquires

"Not at all, your teifling Kador friend over there just tried to get in and now here you are, trying the same thing." A priest replies

"Pfft. Please, I don't know who that guy was. I'm here for my friends." Kessen responds

"Move along then, there are no friends of yours within this temple's walls, and tell your teifling pal to quit walking along this street alone at night. Someone's liable to snatch him away from you, then you'd be all alone." The priest informs Kessen

Realizing it to be a moot point, Kessen relents and backs away from  the temple. He turns and heads back to the Horned Devil and catches up to Menthos.

"What did you do?!" Kessen shouts as he grabs the teifling's arm and spins Menthos around to face him.

"I did nothing, I tried to get in to get Ham-like and Droopy but they wouldn't let me in either." Menthos explains

"They called you Kador, is that your real name?" Kessen demands

"No. That is the name of the God of Fire, who's temple I went to in order to help us out with these Shalimyrians. I guess the two temples don't get along?" Menthos replied

"Are you actually this stupid? What made you think they would get along?" Kessen decries

"I figured steam was good, and hot baths are good. Mr. Lyptus can't take a cold bath, otherwise I'd be known as Mr. Limptus and that would be one of those reverse nicknames I'd never live down." Menthos responds

"Is that all you're about? It occurs to me that you couldn't care less about anyone else nor about their feelings." Kessen states as he jabs an index finger into Menthos' shoulder.

"When you're planting a forest, it behooves you to check the soil for consistency, aeration, and nutrients. It's not my fault you couldn't get wet if I dropped you in the ocean and you swam back to shore." Menthos explains

"Now you're just talking out of you back end. What are you going to do about Haimish and Doopa?" Kessen demands

"Nothing, They're big boys, they can take care of themselves." Menthos answers and begins to walk away.

Kessen grabs Menthos again and this time throws him to the ground after spinning him around.

"Unacceptable!" Kessen shouts

"What do you want me to do? Fight a whole temple, start a religious war, disturb the peace and get thrown in jail?" Menthos replies calmly

Options run through Kessen's mind, none of them seemed possible or heroic. Frustrated Kessen kicks the street next to Menthos and screams silently at the heavens. Kessen leaves Menthos sitting there and heads off to find an inn with a remaining bed for the next few hours.

Menthos picks himself up and continues to the Horned Devil where he spends the rest of the night until dawn.

The sun rises, breakfast comes and goes, and about ten in the morning a rested Haimish awakes. Doopa stands ridged above Haimish, eyes red with dozens of strained blood vessels. 

"Doopa turn." The ogre announce and collapses upon the cot. Haimish dives off just before Doopa's tired body lands. Almost instantly the ogre begins to snore, Haimish guesses he probably fell asleep during the fall. Grinning from the new pun, Haimish  thanks his Shalimyr hosts and exits the building to find an anxious Turgar, Kessen, and Xanthos waiting for him.

"Where's Doopa?" Kessen asks

"Dead I hope." Turgar interjects

"Dead tired is more like it. He'll be sleeping for a while." Haimish answers

"What about you? Are you alright?" Kessen asks

"Never better, I got a great night's sleep." Haimish answers

"Odd, so nothing happened to you?" Turgar inquires

"Nope, not a thing. I don't know what's going on, but I don't think the temple has anything to do with it." Haimish states

Kessen then relates his encounter with a priest atop the roof across from the temple, and of Menthos' travel to the Kador temple and their inability to retrieve Haimish and Doopa following that.

"Certainly a mystery, one I plan on pondering right after I get that gem for Lord De' Lite." Haimish announces

"Hold up there speedy. You don't even know how to get in there." Kessen warns

"Nonsense, a good bribe goes a long ways to getting my into places." Haimish answers

"I still think we need to get someone else in there before you, you're so excited your liable to get in the door and start digging to get to the lower floors." Xanthos comments 

"I agree, that place is probably crawling with magic, I wouldn't doubt that the very walls themselves weren't alive. Constantly watching, in fact the more I think about, the more this sounds like an elaborate suicide attempt." Turgar offers

"Lord De' Lite wouldn't send me to my death, he told me I had potential and that he had faith in my abilities. Why else would he give me the bribe money upfront to pay my way in?" Haimish relates

"Maybe you should spend it on a couple of slaves and send them instead. At least you'd still be alive?" Kessen asks

"No, It must be me. I will do it alone if I have to." Haimish states

"Why don't you let Xanthos try his plan and you go scope out that tavern we passed about a block north of the school and see if anyone in there knows anything. Maybe you could get a job singing and get some contacts that way?" Kessen implores 

Haimish ponders that plan for a moment, "Okay, but let me know if you find anything out." Haimish points to Xanthos

Haimish starts off to The Scholar's Inn, Kessen turns to Turgar, "Maybe you should go with him and keep him out of trouble?" 

Turgar agrees and follows the bard off to the inn.

"Good thinking scout. Brilliant." Xanthos smacks Kessen's shoulder

"Yeah, all we have to do now is get you inside." Kessen answered

Kessen plops himself down on the street corner at an angle so as to see the entire side of the School of Ancient Knowledge that had the only structure that resembled an entrance. 

"Psst, what are you doing?" a familiar voice whispered in Kessen's ear, however he was hoping he was delusional.

"Hey." the voice called out whilst poking the human in the head, Kessen looked up at his worst fears as Menthos stood above him.

"Get lost." Kessen's reply came

"Already played that. I won too, so the challenge just isn't there for me anymore." Menthos answers

"You'll just foul this up, go find a prostitute who takes charity cases, I don't care what you do just get out of here." Kessen spits through clenched teeth.

"Fine." Menthos replies, he looks up and sees a small child heading up the couple of steps to the entrance of the School of Ancient Magic.

"Hey, what's that kid doing? You see that Kessen?" Menthos asks while shoving Kessen's shoulder and pointing out the child to him.

"Go away!" Kessen replies

Perturbed, Menthos brushes away Kessen and starts off towards the child, "If Kessen doesn't want a closer look, then I'll take it. Maybe the kid's got a secret password to get in?" 

"@#%*" Kessen curses as Menthos trots off towards the entrance to the school. Kessen springs up from his sitting position and sprints after Menthos

As soon as Xanthos reached the first step, he could feel the weight of a dozen stares behind him as passersby stopped to view in wonderment this small boy as he climbed the steps to the School of Ancient Knowledge. He reached the landing and the immense stone door stood before him, mocking his stature the way a giant does to most living things. Xanthos felt compelled to turn around and look the gawking crowd in the face, he steeled his nerves however and reached for the door and rapped on it softly. Then returned his hand to his side, the weight of the eyes behind him lifted and Xanthos felt easier, though still not wanting to turn around to see why people had suddenly stopped watching him now.

The stopped crowd in front of the school quickly turned their attention from the oddity of a small poor boy at the base of the School of Ancient Knowledge to the commotion just to the left of the entrance as a human spear tackled a teifling to the ground.

"I told you to get out of here!" Kessen shouts as both men tumble to the ground

Startled and his breath pounded out of him, Menthos tries to turn on his back to see who or what just attacked him. Kessen's voice breaks through his pain though and anger begins to stir within the teifling.

Kessen punches the back of Menthos' head while wrapping his arm around the teifling's left leg to help pin him to the ground.

"Ack! Look sir, I told you I wasn't into your sick sexual games!" Menthos yells, the gathered crowd of onlookers gasp at the accusation and Kessen pauses his beaten to ponder Menthos' words.

The lull in the attack gives Menthos the advantage as he pulls out a miniature mace and jabs it into Kessen's face. Kessen falls backwards off of Menthos, grabbing his face and wiping away the tears from his watering eyes.

"What was that?! It stings. I can't see." Kessen cries

"Just a little mace, extra spicy." Menthos answers

"What is it you want little boy!" A voice booms from the other side of the door.

"Please sir, I am homeless and have no money. I was wondering if there is anything I could clean for you. Maybe a floor or hallway. I am a good scrubber." Xanthos replies

"There's no need for that. Please be gone!" The voice booms back in Xanthos' head.

Wincing from the mental reverberations, Xanthos knocks again, "Please I would do anything. You wouldn't even have to pay me, you could view my work when I am through and judge for yourself." 

Nothing comes into his head, just when Xanthos was ready to give up, "There is one thing you could do."

"Oh anything sir!" Xanthos enthusiastically answers

Xanthos stands ready to have the door open, only he is whisked from the door by a stone hand. Gathering his wits about himself, Xanthos realizes that one of the stone gargoyles from the roof has swooped down and plucked him from the front door. 

The gargoyle deposits Xanthos on the roof and then takes off down the back alley of the school, Xanthos races to the edge and peers over to see the gargoyle disappear through an open door in the back alley. 

"You may commence scrubbing the gargoyles and roof of pigeon dung." The voice returns

Xanthos looks around for a bucket and brush but sees none, "I will need a brush and some water sir."

The gargoyle returns through the door it entered carrying the supplies Xanthos needs to complete his job. The stone creature dumps the supplies next to Xanthos and then returns to its post, watching the world below the school.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*On second thought just kill me now*

Haimish and Turgar enter the dark and smoky Scholar's Inn, Haimish advances to the bar and asks for the owner. A few moments later a barrel chested bald figure strides up to the bard and eases down onto the barstool next to Haimish.

"Well, what do you want?" The man asks

Turgar takes the seat on the opposite side of the man.

"Are you the owner?" Haimish inquires

"Hairy two-fisted is my name. Greatest barroom brawler this side of the Conqueror's River." The man announces

"Doesn't ring a bell. Anyway, do you get any guests from the School of Ancient knowledge in here?" Haimish asks

His pride hurt, Hairy scrunches up his face in a feign attempt at pain, "Maybe, as you should have gathered from entering my establishment, I don't require a background check to order an ale."

"Maybe you've seen some patrons with robes on or obvious spellcasters?" Haimish presses

"We get all kinds here. That troll over there ain't wearing nothing, does that make him a barbarian or stupid, or both?" Hairy laughs as he finishes his comment

"Perhaps I could hang out here and view the patrons for a while? I'm on a secret mission for Lord De' Lite." Haimish replies

"We don't serve Afternoon Delights here, afraid you'll have to look elsewhere for that, I keep a clean business." Hairy answers

Confusion sweeps over Haimish as Hairy's meaning gets lost, "Um, I wasn't talking about a drink."

"I definitely can't help you there then, if you ain't drinking, you ain't staying." Hairy explains

"Do you have bard? Maybe I could sing every night for the chance to mingle instead of drinking?" Haimish asks

"Hmm, I don't have any regular entertainment. Let me hear what you got." Hairy answers


_The palm of my hand 
Carries the weight of my land
For the time to reap
Makes my wife weep 
Thoughts I have but nary
On why I got married
But at least I get to keep
The gold in my sleep_

Turgar begins clapping enthusiastically, "That was wonderful sir, here please accept this meager donation to your further studies." Turgar then hands Haimish ten gold crowns and wanders out the exit still cheering Haimish on.

"Damn ogres." Hairy spits, "Well, at least it rhymed, though I got no idea what the heck you were talking about. I guess you'll do, you play an instrument?"

"Yes, my voice. It is an instrument upon which I guide the chair of my waterfall towards the light of sharing." Haimish replies

"Whatever drugs you're on now, be sure they're out of your system tonight son." Hairy states shaking his head

"I would never stoop to such a position of indifference as to resign control of my mental faculties." Haimish begins to reply

"Shut up. I'll give you room number twelve. Be here promptly at nine each night and as long as you're brining in more money with your singing than if you weren't here then you can stay for free. You can keep all tips, good luck with that, and no songs about bald guys." Hairy explains

Haimish agrees and shakes his hand, then leaves to go tell the others his good news. He finds Turgar looking over Kessen, while a bruised and bloody Menthos dabs his lips with a damp cloth.

"What happened to you guys?" Haimish asks

"Kessen got a little too frisky." Menthos answered

"As soon as you're outside these city walls, I'll inject you with twenty pounds of iron arrowheads." Kessen retorts

"Just as long as you don't try to inject me with whatever it was your were trying with earlier." Menthos responds

"Enough! Where's Xanthos?" Haimish shouts

Kessen points to the School of Ancient Knowledge.

"He got in? That's great! Maybe I can complete my job tonight then? Haimish clapped 

"I assume he got in. Jack-ass over there caused me to lose sight of Xanthos for a moment." Kessen explains

"Well, let me know if you need me then, I've got to go sleep this off. Otherwise the ladies aren't going to want to look upon this tiefling." Menthos states and heads off to find an inn

"Jerk. I hope he gets run over by a carcass wagon on it's way to the cemetery." Kessen relates

The trio wait until nearly sundown, before Kessen spots the form of a descending gargoyle grasping the form of a small child in it's claws. The gargoyle swoops within a couple of feet of the entrance and drops it's payload onto the steps, then soars back to the roof.

Xanthos dusts himself off and spotting the rest of the party, heads over to their location.

"Did you get inside?" Haimish asks excitedly

"Hardly, although I did view the back doors being used by the gargoyles. However, that as close as I came to seeing the inside of the structure." Xanthos shrugs

Haimish relates to Xanthos about the free room and the party agrees to come to watch Haimish sing and then turn in for the evening.

Haimish performs a litany of tunes his parents used to sing to him, he manages a three gold crown tip. Once getting off stage he mingles with the drinking crowd, but spots no one he could reasonably state they might be from the school. Disappointed, he turns in as well for the evening.

"Wake up Haimish." An unfamiliar voice sounded

Haimish slowly opened his tired eyes and viewed the dark room, the rest of the party (minus Doopa and Menthos) still lay asleep on the floor.

"Who's there?" the sound came not from his mouth, but resonated within his mind

"I come from the School of Ancient Knowledge, and I can help you."

Haimish's eyes adjusted to the dim light and saw four figures standing at the foot of his bed. The two outer figures wore robes of green with silver sewn throughout the robe in a spell-like runic design. They were both young men, maybe in their mid-twenties, they each held an open book in their hands as they studied Haimish, writing notes in the book every so often.

Next was an elderly man, perhaps in his seventies. Thin white strands of hair seemed to blow upon a non-existent breeze. This man's robes were white, and seemed to glow like moonlight upon snow. It gave the room a faint bluish tinge to it. He held up a strange staff with many circle within circles at it's head. The head was situated in front of the face of the fourth man.

The fourth man had robes that appeared to be a void, blacker than black, the robes seemed to draw light into them. So that the faint glow of a street candle from the window appeared to slide into the robes and disappear. Even the glow from the elderly man's robes appeared to be slowly swallowed by the vacuum of space this man's robes were made of. His face was shrouded by a hood, only his chin was visible and it appeared to be made of rack with numerous arcane symbols carved into it.

"You're going to help me get the Soul Gem for Lord De' Lite?" Haimish asked

"No, and his name is not Lord De' Lite, it is Kalen and he died over eight hundred years ago." The hooded man spoke

"I'm not following you, the guy I talked to was alive and doing quite well." Haimish retorts

"Yes, he is doing quite well, for the undead. Kalen is an ancient vampire and he has dominated you into retrieving the Soul Gem for him."

"Dominated? I don't feel any different. Wait, now I really don't want to get this gem." Haimish felt no desire to get the gem now

"That's because we have removed that state from you, we can put it back if you wish." 

"No, that's quite okay. This is much better thank you. Wait, what's the catch?" Haimish wondered

"Catch?" 

"Yeah, the catch. Wizards don't routinely show up in inn rooms un-dominating people for the hell of it, and then tell them they have a powerful vampire coming after them." Haimish relates

"Astute you are, yes we do require a service from you. One that requires no thievery or combat of any kind."

"Okay so far, what do I have to do?" Haimish asks

"Kalen will be at Lord Palmere's party next week. We need you to slip this into Kalen's drink." A vial of brilliant light emerged from within the void robe and hovered in front of Haimish

"A little bright don't you think?" Haimish said as he reached out to grab the small vial. Pain erupted in his fingertips as it felt as though Haimish had touched the sun itself

"Hot as well." The hooded man continued "It is liquid sunlight, deadly to vampires, or at least we hope it is. It's nature makes it hard for lab experiments to verify."

"Do I have a choice?" Haimish asked

"Certainly, we will return you to your dominated state and you can perish within our cellar." 

Haimish thought it over, more so for time than any real thinking as he knew what the only option could be.

"Okay, I'll do it." Haimish said as he lowered his head, upon raising it again, the quartet of wizards had vanished and laying on the blankets in front of Haimish was the vial, giving off enough light to make it seem as though there was no ceiling and the sun was directly overhead.

"Hey, close the shades! Some of us are trying to sleep!" Turgar yelled

Haimish knew he just traded one impossible job for another.

Menthos snored loudly as his body worked to undo the swelling and bleeding that Kessen had caused. His sleeping eyes caught glimpses of a roaring fire, the soft glow bathed him in it's warmth, in fact he was pretty warm now that he though about it. It comforted him and reminded Menthos of the fire baths his father would give he and his brother when they were younger, before his father returned to hell.

Menthos would've been at peace and slept soundly had it not been for the smell of smoke that wafted to his nose. Awaking with a jump, Menthos found his entire bed was on fire. Rolling off the bed and out of the flames to the floor, Menthos watched as the flames diminished and snuffed themselves out. The tiefling then sensed the presence of another in his room.

"We need to talk." Helle's voice sounded like the fire Menthos just escaped from.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Lets twist again*

"What do you want?" Menthos asks incredulously

"Your traveling companion, Haimish, he now possesses an item of great interest to Kador. We need you to get it for us." Helle says with fervor

"What are you talking about? I thought he was taking me with him inside the school? That bastard cut me out of the profits. On second thought, it probably that weasel Kessen." Menthos states

"You had planned on getting in the School of Ancient Knowledge? For what purpose?" Helle Inquires

"Haimish fell in love with some lord who talked him up enough into getting a gem for him in the cellars of the school. Paid him good upfront for it too." Menthos relates

"What was this lord's name?" Helle asks

"Lord D' Light I think, it was a funny name for someone with enough money to change it." Menthos answers

"That name is unfamiliar to me, I shall have to research it. In the meantime, we do not believe Haimish entered the school, the item was brought to him this evening." Helle divulges

"So, we can't you go ask him yourself? What do you need me for?" Menthos inquires

"Yes, our usual crusade is to burn down the building and sift through the ashes for the item we seek. Unfortunately in this case overt knowledge of our involvement in procuring this item is not something we wish to afford at this point." Helle explains

"You're not telling me anything here. If you want it so bad, then go ask him for it, I'm sure he'd give it up, especially if you said please." Menthos argues

"If I ask him for it, he will not survive to tell you about our meeting." Helle says with passion

"I'm still failing to see where you need me to get involved in some way, he doesn't like me anyway, his death neither pushes away nor draws me closer to world domination. Kill the guy for all I care." Menthos squelches 

"Yesterday, you cared so much that you delivered to us news of the Shalimyrians involvement in kidnappings, because your friend was inside that dank place. Today you care nothing, your whims are like a candle flame, dim and easily snuffed out." Helle states

"Don't try any of your intimidation crap on me, my father ...." Menthos begins, but is cut off

"Was a demon of small import, a dretch among balors not worthy of a summoning from an initiate wizard." Helle finishes

"How is it you presume to know anything about me?" Menthos retorts, standing up from his seated position on the bed.

"I presume nothing, your lineage is written all over your attitude. It smolders within you and yet you refuse to let that fire fuel your engine. You could be much more than what your father left you as, yet your only passion is in not having any. You have until next sun up to deliver the item to me, or we'll see just how much you don't care." Helle spoke. Menthos clenched his fists and readied a barbed reply, only to have Helle speak a single word and vanish.

Menthos kicked his bed several times until the skin on his shin was bludgeoned raw. Anger seethed within him, and that is what finally calmed him down. Was he angry at Helle for embarrassing him, or was he angry at Haimish for making his life difficult now?

Haimish tried several times to shade the vial from not giving off it's blinding light, however every piece of cloth he used eventually began to smolder and he was afraid it would catch fire. Afraid of waking his companions, he left them there to sleep. Tucking the vial into his helmet and covering the openings with his cloak, he fled to the street and started walking trying to come up with some way to store this item before it killed him.

"Haimish!" A low booming voice called out

Looking up, Haimish saw the broad shoulders of Doopa lumbering towards him. Haimish waved and the ogre pressed on towards Haimish.

"Doopa, feel much better after getting sleep in house that smelled like rain." the ogre commented

"I'm glad, I've got a room at the Scholar's Inn just up the road, everybody else is there, except Menthos I don't know where he is." Haimish relates

"Right behind you." Menthos answers

Startled, Haimish wheels around to face Menthos as Doopa laughs at Haimish's flinching.

"You scared me, what brings you out this late at night?" Haimish asks

"You, seems like you got a present tonight. You weren't thinking of not sharing were you?" Menthos questions

"Oh! Doopa like presents. What did Haimish get?" the ogre asks

"How do you know anything about this?" Haimish asks while showing the covered helmet.

"I am half immortal, I have abilities beyond your most exhaustive comprehension. May I see the item?" Menthos asks

"No, it'll burn your eyes blind with the light it gives off, heck you can't even hold it, it'll burn right through your hands." Haimish explains

"Haimish got Poison Sumac as gift? That very strange gift to give, Doopa would take it back and give to giver." Doopa shares

"Why would the wizard bookworms give you something you couldn't use? Seems stupid to me, likely a bad prank on their part. I'll wager that they're up there betting on when you uncover the item in the heart of the city and illuminate the whole place." Menthos relates

"Apparently I was dominated by a vampire into trying to steal the Soul Gem, the school took care of the domination but in a quid pro quo way. Now I'm stuck with this item I have to use to kill the vampire with, and I can't hold it!" Haimish exasperates

"Let me try." Menthos asks

Dubious to the teifling's intentions, Haimish hesitates, "Why? What do you want it for?" 

"To prove that I can hold it for one, and to prove this item even exists for starters." Menthos explains

Haimish holds out his helmet to Menthos, "Don't say I didn't warn you."

Menthos reaches in and grasps the small vial, while it is hot in his hand, it fails to burn his fire resistant skin.

"It doesn't burn you?" Haimish found it hard to believe

"Doopa want a turn!" The ogre announces as he reaches his hand into the helmet and closes his fist around Menthos' hand

"Ow! That hot! That is bad shaman magic, Doopa will destroy for Haimish, put thing on ground and Doopa will smash!" The ogre shouts

"That won't be necessary." Menthos states as he wraps up the vial in Haimish's cloak and holds it in his hand, "Haimish, I don't like unenlightenment. Something stinks here and it's not the ogre." 

Doopa gave a look of dumbfoundment as he sniffed his armpits.

"What do you mean?" Haimish asks

Menthos held the item in his palm, he thought how easy it would be to walk away and give it to Helle and be done with it. Then he thought of keeping the item for himself, a little leverage in case he needed it. His hesitation became noticeable and Haimish reached out to take the item back from Menthos. Menthos saw the hand reach out, his brain willed for his arm to move away from Haimish, but he was too slow as the bard reclaimed the vial.

"Tell me everything the wizard said, and then I'll tell you what I know, and together we'll figure out what's going on here." Menthos sighed and hung his head.

Haimish smiled and gladly relayed the night's conversation with the four wizards from the School of Ancient Knowledge, then Menthos told Haimish about Helle and his wanting of the item, making sure to leave out the family heritage parts.

"Doopa not get it." The ogre drooled as his slacked jaw tried to suck up the dripping saliva from his mouth. It would soon be dawn and the smells of freshly baking bread was filling the streets

"That's probably for the best, the less who know the less chance we'll get squashed." Haimish tells the ogre

Menthos and Haimish part ways, Haimish leads the ogre back to the Scholar's Inn with instructions to tell the rest of the party that he'll be back soon. Menthos heads east and then north as he makes his way through the bustle of Caravan Street and the many street vendors lining the street. The looming silhouette of the Courts of Maal at the far end of Caravan Street played against the very nature of Menthos, silently he wished for a safe place such as that to crawl into.

After dropping Doopa off, Haimish approached the School of Ancient Knowledge. Advancing up the entrance steps, he banged on the door in the most obnoxious way he could think off.

"Who invades the sanctity our peace?" a voice booms through Haimish's head

"Tell the void robed guy that Haimish is here to see him, I have few questions." Haimish boasts

"There is no one here by that description, now leave!" The voice echoes in Haimish's head

"Okay then, but tell him I'm going to give his little present to the Kadorians. They had a much better offer." Haimish states and turns to walk away.

He gets four steps into the street when he is snatched from the ground by a pair of stony claws. The gargoyle circles up and over the school and into the back alley. The gargoyle races to the ground at a breakneck speed. For a second or two, Haimish thought the gargoyle was sent to kill him, but the creature pulls up at the last moment and flies through an open door and darkened archway. Instantly Haimish is transported to the most opulent room he has ever seen or heard about. The gargoyle dumps it's cargo onto the floor and turns to retrace it's flight path through the only exit visible in the room.

"Am I to guess that you're having some sort of conscience dilemma?" the hooded man speaks

"Hardly. I've already been threatened just for having your potion, some church. Apparently they knew who to bribe in your organization to figure out what I've got." Haimish accuses

"Ah the bitter Kadors, that will certainly complicate things for you. You don't think they'd let the Temple of Tinel show them up do you? I already know you have the item still, and I don't believe you'd give it to them. You're coming here was out of fear, you fear the Kadors, whereas we couldn't care less about their religious fire. All you have to do is use the item as instructed and everything will play out for you magical ways." The hooded man answers

"Is that a threat or a bribe?" Haimish inquires

"It's a promise, complete the task and I shall reward you with an item from our vast treasury worthy of your deeds." The hooded man speaks

"Well, you didn't mention that part last night. I'm starting to warm to your job, although I really need the name of a good glass blower, I can't keep running through clothes like this." Haimish says as he holds up the smoldering corpse of his once fine cloak.

The hooded man turns his head to the green robed man to his right and whispers something in a language Haimish had not heard before. The green robed man goes to a Darkwood desk and procures a parchment from a drawer. He inks a few lines of writing on it and then replaces the ink pen and walks to Haimish parchment first.

"This is the name of a reputable glass blower, although I fail to see your need for him. The only other means of transport we could find was to encase it in an ever-regenerating crystal from the demi-plane of mineral." The hooded man replies

"Ah, Now I see, I have to perform secret legerdemain with a white hot glowing object in a room full of witnesses, while fighting off jealous priests who will be trying to steal it from me. That should be fun.  Thanks for the recommendation nonetheless." Haimish retorts

"I never said this would be like feeding a baby, if you know where Kalen is staying feel free to confront him there." With that, Haimish is grabbed by the gargoyle once again and dragged through the exit to the room, he has the sensation of falling and then steps out into the back alley of the school. A small gold coin lies on the ground in front of him.

"When the deed is done, return through the doorway behind you with the coin in your outstretched left hand. That is the only way to reach me again." The hooded man's voice rings inside Haimish's head.

"I want to know what the vial is supposed to do. The bookworms state it's to kill a vampire, I'm not going to get this thing from Haimish unless I know why I have to risk me neck for it." Menthos demands

"A fair request, so I shall tell you. About fifteen months ago, the School of Ancient Knowledge came to our temple to procure our services in creating an item that would house a portion of the sun's power in a portable container. Intrigued by their offer, we listened instead of brandishing them blasphemers and igniting their souls with actual power from the sun." Helle starts

"You can skip all the we're the most sovereign crap and just stick with the facts." Menthos replies

"The payment they offered was not nearly enough for what we considered a sacred item, therefore no deal was brokered. The school however was not deterred and they went to the Tinels instead, there they found a willing abettor and the Tinels set out to take the secrets of the sun and give them to the School of Ancient Knowledge. The item was completed three weeks ago and we have been scrying it after having learned of it's manufacture only this week." Helle relates

"So that's what the roasting of the priestess of Tinel was for?" Menthos fathoms

"You read between the lines well. This item cannot be allowed to endure, if word got out that the Tinels could replicate and domain from any deity they wished, then what purpose would our faith serve? The Temple of Tinel would be become your one-stop-shop for all your religious needs." Helle related

Menthos pondered this a moment, "What if I were to give you a demonstration of this item? A nearly personal one, such that only you would know what was actually transpiring?" Menthos asked

"That may be acceptable, what are your conditions?" Helle inquires

"We're going to use it to destroy a vampire in nine days. You can get to see it up close." Menthos states

"We are not allowed, nor were we invited to Lord Palmere's party." Helle responds

"Yeah? Can't imagine why. Just leave that part up to me, if I can get you into the party, will you leave Haimish alone until then?" Menthos asked

"Agreed. Thank you for coming to me with this offer. I have someone who would like to meet you." Helle states

"It's not my dad is it?" Menthos asks

"No, his name is Statinistor and he is the highest ranking priest in the Church of Kador on this plane. He has told me he sees great things in your future." Helle corrects

"Really? I could have told you that." Menthos comments and is led away by Helle


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Finding the password*

Haimish returned to the Scholar's Inn and explained to the rest of the group what had gone on all night and to show off the vial of liquid sunlight.

"What does Menthos gain by helping you?" Kessen inquired

"I don't believe anything." Haimish replied

"I don't believe that for one second, I bet he's in the back pocket of the Kadors. That's why I never bothered to get into religion, wipe away the varnish and they're just like every other organization, all about control." Kessen offers

"Doopa have religion, Doopa's tribe fell from heavens after winning freedom from giants." The ogre says proudly

"Too bad when you fell you all landed on your heads, permanently contorting your skulls into inhospitable places to house a brain." Turgar counters

"I don't want to think about conspiracies and plots right now, I want to get out of the city for a while. I need to hone up some of my skills before I try to bluff a vampire with sunlight." Haimish relates

"Where would you go to do that?" Xanthos asks

"How about the Mermist? It's close and along the edge you find a few scouting lizardmen, you can practice sneaking up on them while we practice killing them." Kessen suggests

"That might be a good plan." Haimish agrees

"I think I should stay here, I do not want to upset the balance on nature in the swamp. The Mermist lies next to the Silverwood Valley, my homeland, and I can ill afford to bring about vengeance upon my family if the Mermist lizardmen see a centaur involved." Xanthos states

"We'll wait until they attack and we'll make sure they're all dead and buried before moving on." Kessen says 

"I am not sure that would be better." Xanthos replies

Xanthos packs anyway along with the rest of the group as they wait for Menthos to return. They grow restless and Kessen offers to go drag him back from the temple when Menthos finally arrives bearing a stripped holly branch in his left hand.

"Eek! What did you do to the tree?" Xanthos asks accusingly

"Statinistor told me if I was ever in distress, to strip a holly branch and carry it forth in my left hand. Someone would be along shortly to assist me. I'm just trying it out to see if it works." Menthos answers

"Does it work?" Haimish asks

"I don't think so, all I found was you guys." Menthos responds

"Let's get going before we lose daylight." Kessen presses, "and you're with me teifling, I don't want you wandering out of my light of sight." 

"It warms my heart so to know of your fondness for me, shall we consummate this relationship now or once you get me alone in the woods?" Menthos answers

Kessen shoves Menthos out the door as the rest of the group follows, it takes an hour to wind through the streets and exit the city, Kessen leads them along a well worn hunting path heading west from Highcastle for about two hours before the party notices the group getting less firm and the grass begins to get extremely wet, as though it was laden with dew.

"Be on the lookout, the lizardmen like encroaching the swamp onto farmland and cities, I expect to see a few scouting parties soon." Kessen states

The party reaches the point where standing water is the norm and good sized mud hills about four feet high start to dominate the landscape.

"This is where the lizardmen would most likely ambush from, those mud hills are built with shallow pools behind them so that the lizardmen can spring up unseen as people pass through the swamp. Very effective if you don't know to look for them." Kessen relates

"How does one combat that?" Xanthos inquires

"With these." Kessen reaches into a belt pouch and withdraws a few small yellow pellets. He transfers all but one into his left hand and then tosses the remaining one over a small mud hill. The sound of splashing water coincides with a brilliant flash of light.

"Flash pellets, how amateur." Menthos states

"They'll keep you alive long enough for me to kill you." Kessen retorts

"Ooh, can hardly wait. You keep promising me but I'm not seeing any action." Menthos replies

Haimish and Turgar turn around to pull apart the two warring men, as a blowgun dart whizzes into the shoulder of Doopa.

"Ow, Someone shot Doopa with big splinter!" The ogre roars

The fighting quiets down as another dart ricochets off of Haimish's shield.

"We're under attack, that way!" Kessen yells and points off to the left

Doopa charges in the direction of Kessen's finger and crests a mud hill looking for the offenders, the rest of the party spreads out trying to get a better look at where the attack is coming from.

"So much for being sneaky." Haimish laments

A lizardman raises his head above the water line in front of the hill Doopa is on and blows a dart into the thigh of Kessen.

"Argh! There, behind you Doopa!" Kessen yells and crouches to the ground as the lizardman disappears below the surface of the water.

Doopa leaps off the mud hill and lands in waist deep pit filled with water, a startled lizardman rises next to Doopa, who promptly brings his club down on the creature's head, crushing it's neck and sending it crashing back into the pit.

"Doopa like whack a mole game!" The ogre gleefully shouts

After a few moments and no further lizardmen surface, a dejected Doopa reaches below him and feels around for another lizardman. He grabs a hold of a leather strap and yanks the stunned lizardman out of the water. A prepared and waiting volley of attacks are launched into the quickly turning corpse.

Disappointed at not being able to off the one he pulled from the water, Doopa searches again but only finds the dead one he killed. Nonetheless he hauls up that body and tosses it towards the party. Five arrows and an eldritch blast are wasted on the dead carcass as it flops unceremoniously on the ground weighted down with extra iron and wood.

Doopa stands there chuckling at the party's response, as he retrieves the other lizardman's body and begins to rummage through it's belongings. Kessen obtains the blowgun and the remaining darts from the one in front of him as Turgar finds a few copper pieces but nothing else.

"Nothing else? Not even a dagger?" Haimish asks

"No, usually it's not needed. The poisoned darts do the trick and there's no need for hand-to-hand combat, if it comes to that they just flee and hope you follow them while they shoot you again with their darts." Kessen explains

Mostly uninjured the party presses on, but finds no more takers for their practice, the sun begins to slip in the western sky.

"I need to start heading back to town, I've got a gig in a few hours." Haimish advises

"We're a bit far north of the city, we can either head due east and link up with the King's Road into Highcastle, or we can take the overland route. Both will take about the same amount of time." Kessen advises

"I'd like to take the road, I need to dry out a bit and don't want to go singing smelling like I've been sleeping in the fields all day." Haimish answers

The party reaches the road in due time and begins their journey south. The road is bordered by tall grass to either side, rising as high as five feet in some places, after a few hundred feet Kessen holds his hand up to stop the group.

Sniffing the air and looking about Kessen whispers, "We're being stalked."

"Yeah, by your over-active imagination." Menthos counters

Kessen spots the moving grass up ahead and to the right of the road, he advances up the road to be parallel with the movement and unleashes an arrow into the grass. A shout of pain and a flurry of motion erupt from the grass as six bandits rear up and fire into Kessen, nearly downing the scout.

Doopa charges into the fray, crashing his club through the gathering of men like a bowling ball, Turgar activates his vigor aura and moves up to keep Kessen within thirty feet of him. Haimish breaks into a song of encouragement.

_Our team is dynamite
Our team is dynamite
tick tick tick tick 
BOOM dynamite
BOOM dynamite_

Xanthos heads off into the tall grass behind Doopa, but Menthos hesitates, speculating that the rest of the party has the bandits well in hand. He scans the opposite side of the road and he catches a glimpse of movement out of the corner of his eye, spinning around he faces more bandits. This group however has an obvious spellcaster as well as archers in chain shirts and with the look of competency in their eyes.

"Flanked!" Haimish yells out as see noticed Menthos did not advance and turned to see what his problem was and noticed the line of attackers behind them.

Three arrows shot into the chest of Haimish as he finished his shout, dropping the bard prone and bleeding badly from severe chest wounds. Xanthos halts his advance behind Doopa and switches to take a wide circle back towards the new threat. Doopa continues to pound away at the frightened bandits in the grass, his massive club hiding the sun just before he crams two-hundred pounds of wood into their skulls.

Kessen rips out the arrow piercing his side and turns to fire a shot at the attackers behind the party, hitting the far right one in the shoulder. Menthos watches as the spellcaster begins the somatic portion of a spell, he raises his hand to throw an eldritch blast into the mage but miss aims and the blast kicks up a cloud of dirt in front of the spellcaster.

"They've got spell resistance!" Menthos shouts as the mage completes his spell and Turgar is over come with fatigued and drops down to sleep in the middle of the road.

Doopa finishes off the last of the bandits he was attacking and turns to face the new threat, Kessen hobbles up to Haimish and shoves a goodberry into his mouth. While not enough to bring the bard to consciousness, it does stop the flow of blood from his chest.

Outnumbered six to one, Menthos reviewed his options. Flee or fight, he decided to hold up the holly branch in hopes someone would come to his aid. The spellcaster paused as the sight of Menthos holding the branch up perplexed him, at first he thought the teifling was casting a spell but he could detect no other components of a spell, then he though the teifling had activated a magic item, but it appeared to do nothing.

"Surrender now, and we'll let you live." The spellcaster announced

"Well, you'll be blind and deaf, but alive nonetheless." the archer next to the mage spoke

"I chose option C." Menthos replied and willed the magic ring he found in the Duergar Ale Chute to activate while he gave the opposing wizard the universal "peace" sign with his finger.

Brilliantly colored hues of light issued forth from the ring, dazzling all six bandits. The rest of the party took a moment to realize what had transpired, once they saw the bandits staring off into space they attacked en masse and quickly killed their dazed foes.

As Menthos looted the dead mage's body, Xanthos tended to the downed Haimish, filling him with enough healing magic to make him nearly as good as new. After receiving a brief recollection of the battle's events, Haimish went to thank Menthos personally, and found the teifling holding up a silvered thin stick in the fading sunlight.

"Wand?" Haimish asks

Menthos nods.

"Magical?" Haimish asks

Menthos turns and gives the bard a disgusted look, "Duh."

"Can I see it?" Haimish asks

"No, I don't know what it does yet." Menthos replies

"I've studied a bit of magic, I might know what it does, a bard's magic has many qualities." Haimish tells Menthos

"No, because if it's a wand of fireballs, I'm keeping it, or a wand of lightening, or cone of cold, or scorching ray, or ray of enfeeblement, or chest enhancer." Menthos explains

"They make those? I promise to give it back after I look at it." Haimish pleads

Menthos sighs and relents to Haimish's inspection, the bard runs his hands over the wand and concentrates on trying to activate the wand.

"Is it a wand of constipation? Because it appears to be doing that to you." Menthos says annoyed with how long Haimish was taking

"I'm concentrating, be quiet." Haimish replies

"Give it back." Menthos says as he grabs it from the bard's hands

"Hey! I wasn't done yet." Haimish decries

"Allacazoola mythicaboula bipitty bopitty boo." Menthos says while shaking the wand

"What kind of words are those? Sounded like a baby golem's lullaby." Haimish wonders

"Aw, shoot something dammit!" Menthos yells and shakes the wand. Five small energy missiles are discharged from the wand's tip and slam into the back of Haimish

"You shot me?! Why? You bastard." Haimish breathes as his newly healed body is torn apart by the magic missiles from the wand.

Kessen runs up to the scene and instead of checking on Haimish, he cold-cocks Menthos, knocking the teifling to the ground. Xanthos advances to the downed Haimish again while Turgar re-ignites his vigor aura in hopes of stabilizing Haimish.

"What was that for?" Menthos asks incredulously

"Your time is up pal!" Kessen announces as he notches an arrow at Menthos

"He wanted to know what it did? Can you not think of a better example?" Menthos asks while waving his holly branch in the air

"Quit whining and take you death like a man!" Kessen shouts

Doopa nudges the bow with his club and Kessen's arrows slices off into the grass.

"What? What are you doing?" Kessen asks

"Menthos help Doopa with troll problem, Doopa not let human kill Menthos now." The ogre speaks

"What are you talking about? It was Kessen that got us out of jail that night, the teifling wasn't even there." Turgar lies to Doopa

This confuses the ogre who re-evaluates that night's events.

"Hey Doopa." Menthos calls while brandishing a couple gold crowns in his hand

"Shiny!" Doopa yells and advances to take the coins from Menthos' hand

"Enough." Haimish speaks as Xanthos helps him to his feet and then helps him walk over to Menthos, "I'm taking this, you obviously have no idea how to handle one of these." 

Haimish takes the wand from Menthos' hand, "Oh, I think I can handle my stick. You're the one that had no idea how to work it."

Haimish points the stick at Menthos and speaks "Shoot dammit!" but nothing issues from the wand

"See, the wand rejects you. Clearly I should be the one to operate the thing." Menthos states

"Doopa will use toothpick." The ogre replies as he tries to snatch the wand from Haimish

"Oh please let the idiot shoot his head off with it. In fact I think after Doo-pah is dead, Menthos should have to carry it in his scroll case." Turgar says well pointing to his rear end.

"How do you work this?" Haimish demands

"Takes one to know one." Menthos answers

"What the hell is that? I want to know the trigger word!" Haimish demands

Okay, but if I tell you, you have to promise not to you use it inside the house." Menthos answers

Haimish is so upset at this point that he can't muster a response.

"The trigger words are Amanda Huggenkis." Menthos replies

Detecting no attempt at deceit, Haimish holds the wand up high. Confused stares abound as Haimish tries out the trigger words while Menthos falls to his knees laughing hysterically. The party heads back to town with Haimish trying out the trigger words ever so often an Menthos overcome with fits of laughter he explains off as a side effect of his magical ring.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> "The trigger words are Amanda Huggenkis." Menthos replies
> 
> Detecting no attempt at deceit, Haimish holds the wand up high. Confused stares abound as Haimish tries out the trigger words while Menthos falls to his knees laughing hysterically. The party heads back to town with Haimish trying out the trigger words ever so often an Menthos overcome with fits of laughter he explains off as a side effect of his magical ring.




Beautiful! I love a PC with a high Bluff skill.

A previous character I played had an absurdly high Bluff and Charisma score and I would routinely lie to everyone and anyone... nothing major, of course. Just enough of a tweak to make me look more heroic! It was a blast.

And in my other story hour, since the wizard got his Earrings of Lies nobody's sure when he's lying or telling the truth. Well, except for the holy warrior who (I think) gets to add his level to his Sense Motive checks or something.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Beautiful! I love a PC with a high Bluff skill.
> 
> A previous character I played had an absurdly high Bluff and Charisma score and I would routinely lie to everyone and anyone... nothing major, of course. Just enough of a tweak to make me look more heroic! It was a blast.




Oh, if you think that is something, wait until Menthos gets to Lord Palmere's party for some truly heroic bluffing. Think along the lines of him rolling a natural 20 plus his ranks in the skill whilst I roll a "1" with only a +1 bonus..... It gets thick.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Like a deer in torch lights*

The party makes it back to Highcastle an hour before Haimish is due on stage. Kessen breaks away form the party and heads towards an odd merchant on the south side of town, Broggart’s Store. The rest of the party heads to the Scholar Inn to catch Haimish’s performance and then head off to bed. 

Kessen spied the dilapidated structure from afar; Broggart was a retired barbarian raider from the Xosa clan, nearly wiped out twenty years ago by druids from Druid Hold. The building was purchased by Broggart who then set up shop and never paid any further attention to the building. The last twenty years had not been kind to the wooden frame, slats were missing from the roof and quite a few of the external planks had fallen out only to be replaced by cut logs. The building looked like something a deranged hermit would build. Just the type of man Kessen wanted to deal with.

“Ho there my good man, I confiscated this blowgun from a lizardman who won’t be needing it anymore, I was wondering if you had any knowledge of its workings?” Kessen inquires

“Is the lizardman dead, or did you just collapse a lung and wish him well?” Broggart asks

“Dead, along with his hunting buddy. Although I couldn’t recover that blowgun, my ogre companion broke it while beating the thing senseless.” Kessen relates

“Good! Never could trust a snake, the thing’s real easy to use though. Put the needle in and then blow real hard. The trick is in the aiming, that’s what makes them unreliable.” Broggart advises

“Can you teach me?” Kessen implores

“Nope, that weapon is for the cowardly and dainty, and I ain’t either of those. If you want to learn how to work that, go see one of the harlots down by the bazaar.” Broggart replies

*sigh* “Ok, how about I just sell this one then?” Kessen responds

The Inn is full with patrons this evening; the party had to wait for a table to open before they could seat themselves. Not wanting to wait any longer, Doopa unseats two drunken patrons and they tumble to the floor, he then waves over the party while pointing out the now empty table.

The party meets Doopa at the table as the ogre flags down a serving wench. Menthos however heads to the bar by himself.

“Excuse me barkeep!” Menthos catches the attention of the harried dwarven bartender, “do you have any of those meads with candy in it? You know Rock Mead?”

“What! No such drink exists, and if it did I would beat the man who invented it!” The dwarf shouts back

“Alrighty, how about two meads and a pouch of rock candy then?” Menthos replies

The dwarf complies with the request without thinking of the request. Menthos takes his drinks and turns to head to Doopa’s table, when he spots a sign at the end of the bar.


_Lottery Tonight 1,000 gold crowns
2 gold crowns per ticket
Drawing at nine_

Menthos buys three tickets and then seats himself at Doopa’s table.

“I don’t think you told me the right trigger word Menthos, I can’t get the wand to do anything” Haimish accuses

“Haimish, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now, quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.” Menthos answers while waving off the bard with his free hand. 

Doopa then returns to the table just before the announcement of the numbers

“Wining number will be two.” Doopa states

“How do you know that?” Menthos asks

“Doopa saw all the pretty numbers in barrel and told man if he knew what was good for him, he would say number two is winner!” Doopa shouts gleefully 

A scrawny little man steps up to the lip of the stage and the room goes quiet as he looks over the wining ticket number in his hand, then out at the crowd, his eyes resting on a smiling Doopa. The man swallows hard as he announces that the winning ticket is number two.

“Woo hoo! Doopa was right number two is the best number!” Doopa rejoices 

The man’s knees quake with fear as Doopa shoots out of his chair, the man turns to give the ogre his winnings, but as he turns around he sees the ogre arguing with a teifling at the table there are sitting at.

“You idiot! You could’ve told me what the special number was before I bought the tickets!” Menthos shouts

Haimish and Turgar laugh themselves out of their seats, as an inebriated Halfling wins the payday of his life.

“And now the musical stylings of Haimish!”  Hairy announces to some fanfare.

“Thank you, thank you. Thanks everybody for coming.” Haimish states, and then begins his set for the night

_Haimish, Haimish McHaggis
He’s the most important person in history
From the Plains of Zuras
Comes a tale that is mostly gory

On the road to Highcastle 
Numerous bandits he did meet
Killed them all with one thrust
Of his perfectly pedicured feet

When you dance with Haimish 
He’ll twirl you that way, dip you this way
You’ll have a Gaelic time!_

As the crowd cheered on Haimish, Menthos slumped back in his seat, “Man, I can’t believe what passes as entertainment in this town. I need to perfect my beauty queen hand wave and find a parade somewhere.” 

“You do not find his tunes enjoyable?” Xanthos inquired

“No, they grate against my soul. Now if he were to sing of something a little more heavy like war, or love, or the making of either. Then perhaps I could get into it. Right now it sounds more like two bullettes in heat and neither one realizing the other is female until it’s too late.” Menthos replies

“You are a sick little man.” Turgar states

“Wrong there bucko, the Temple of Kador says I’m a fine specimen of fiendish origin. So take that.” Menthos answers by sticking out his tongue at Turgar

Kessen joins the group as Haimish finishes his song; Menthos excuses himself and heads off to bed. Haimish sings for another hour and garners his best tips to date. 

“Yes! Twenty one gold crowns, too many more of those nights and I won’t need to seek my fortune anywhere else but the stage.” Haimish relates

“What’s on tap for tomorrow?” Kessen asks

“More practice.” Haimish answers, “I’m still no where near ready for a vampire.”

Morning finds the group leaving Highcastle again in search of things to kill and stuff to take.

“Let’s head into the Dearthwood this time, I could use some orc practice.” Haimish pleads

“I too would like to visit the Dearthwood, I know of a local druidic circle there. Perhaps they could offer assistance?” Xanthos agrees

“Maybe they have anti-toxin?” Kessen asks

“You don’t need anti-toxin if you grab the snake by the tail. If you grab it by the tongue, you should expect to get bitten.” Menthos states

“Doopa smash snake with club, then it not matter which end Doopa picks up.” The ogre offers

“I didn’t know there were snakes on the north side of the Neck*. On the good side we call those things arms and they are usually attached to someone.” Turgar laughs

The party heads north out of Highcastle and soon finds themselves facing an impressive front of tall thick trees.  Xanthos speaks with some birds and a field mouse and learns of the location of the druidic circle. Xanthos leads them northwest into the woods and finally to a small clearing.

“Stay here, I will go meet with them.”  Xanthos tells the party

“Meet with who? I don’t see anybody.” Menthos answers

“They’re preparing for attack; if you go in there they’ll kill you.” Xanthos states

“Kill me with what? Berries and nuts? Or maybe they’ll throw feces at me from the tree tops?” Menthos replies

Xanthos doesn’t respond and moves to the center of the glade with outstretched and upturned palms. He stops in the middle of the clearing and appears to have a conversation with someone on the far side of the glade. After a few minutes he returns.

“They have agreed to let us put down some orcs.” Xanthos says proudly

“We needed permission? Bunch of sissified moss farmers out here.” Menthos shouts

“The circle works to maintain a balance within nature, to upset that balance would bring upon their wrath.” Xanthos answers

“Push him some more, I want to see that.” Kessen states

“Balance? Well, it did work so well for you, a perfect balance of half ass and half man. I think it would be better if you were a horse’s head with a man’s body. Now that would be balance.” Menthos replies

“The druids have shown me a forest trail frequented by deer that is a favorite hunting spot for orcs of this side of the Dearthwood.” Xanthos relates, ignoring the ranting Menthos

“Great, lead on.” Kessen abdicates to the centaur

“Oh, Doopa likes venison. Mmm tasty.” The ogre smiles

“No, we are not to touch the deer, only the hunting orcs.” Xanthos admonishes

Hurt Doopa looks towards Menthos for support; Menthos gives him a pat on the shoulder and a wink.

“How do we know if it’s really deer?” Menthos asks, but Xanthos does not reply, “I mean you can change into a cat, who’s to say whether or not the deer aren’t shape shifted orcs waiting to attack us from behind?” 

“Orcs do no practice the same reverence of nature as the circle does, that would not shift into a deer. A teifling maybe, but not a deer.” Xanthos answers 

“Well then how do you know I’m not Menthos?” The teifling inquires

“I don’t, I gave the circle your exact description, for all I know they’ve kidnapped you and replaced you with an exact duplicate.” Xanthos relates

“Yeah, but did they have to duplicate his attitude too?” Kessen asks

Haimish and Turgar begin to laugh as a loud crash thunders to the party’s right, trees sway and are leveled as something huge lumbers through the thick woods heading for the party.

“Must be mating season?” Menthos postulates

The party spreads out as the last few trees between them and whatever is approaching fall to the side as a huge grey wart covered creature with misshapen teeth and preceding gut bellows at the party.

“Cave troll.” Turgar shouts 

Doopa charges the beast, but as he approaches the thing, it swings it’s massive tree trunk and swats away the ogre like a fly. Doopa is lifted off his feet and flung into an adjacent tree trunk fifteen feet in the air. The blow knocks the wind from his lungs as he crashes down to the forest floor unconscious.

“Oh uh.” Haimish says as he brakes into a moral boosting tune

_Oh ugly beast
Please don’t eat me
The druid is much tastier 
He’s half horse meat_

“Now that’s a tune I could get behind!” Menthos shouts as he gives Haimish a thumbs-up approval on his choice of material he then blasts the side of the creature’s head with an eldritch blast, “Stupid troll, don’t you know this is a deer crossing!”

“Please wait! I was not given clearance to kill a cave troll, we must retreat!” Xanthos yells

“Okay, you engage it and give us cover to run for it.” Turgar replies

Xanthos hesitates as the creature charges Haimish who raises his shield in time to deflect a blow for his head, still, the force of the swing knocks the bard onto his back as the creature plows forward.

Doopa shakes of the effects of the stunning shot he took and sits up next to the tree he collided with. Still dazed, his ears heard the sounds of battle behind him and his heart forced a rage, bypassing his brain chance to assess the situation.

Menthos scurries around to stand over Haimish and point his ring at the troll; a spray of color erupts all around the troll’s head. The beast’s eyes gloss over as he wavers in his stance and is transfixed upon the small pinpoints of light, it even tries to reach out and grab at the lights. Haimish breathes a thank you at Menthos as an enraged Doopa slams into the beast’s side with his club. Turgar follows while Kessen dances around the creature firing arrows into the beast. 

With an almighty crunch, the troll is felled as it collapses in front of Xanthos.

“Kessen, go scout up some tinder, we’re going to need at lot of wood to light this thing up.” Menthos instructs

“What! No way! I will not allow you to start a fire in here!” Xanthos screams

“Well, he’s just going to wake up again and who knows if the ring works next time or not.” Menthos advises

“I don’t care; you’re not starting a fire.” Xanthos pounds a fist into the troll

“I’m with Xanthos; we don’t need bad karma from the druids.” Haimish states

The rest of the party agrees, outnumbered Menthos concedes and relents. The party hurries away from the beast, trying to get some distance between themselves and the troll before it rises to come looking for them.



* Reference to Neuwag's Neck a part of the Cloudwall Mountains


----------



## pogre

> “Please wait! I was not given clearance to kill a cave troll, we must retreat!” Xanthos yells




Druids - the old U.N.

"You are remembered for the rules you break."
- General Douglas MacArthur


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Ambush!*

The party races south from the troll, paralleling its track through the woods. Kessen scouts ahead of the party, pointing out various points along the way that could be used as ambush places for orcs. Avoiding the clearings and river crossings, Kessen leads the party to the edge of the woods where it meets the Troll Fens.

“I think you did too well of a job, you’ve managed to avoid the orcs completely.” Turgar says

“They’re in there; I didn’t want to face an ambush. The orcs aren’t stupid; they’re going to fight from a tactically sound position.” Kessen replies

“It’s a good thing you got us permission to kill something we can’t find Xanthos, good work. Maybe tomorrow you can get permission for us to find food we can’t eat? We can smell it and hold it, but not eat it.” Menthos verbally spars with the centaur

“This isn’t my fault, Kessen admits to intentionally skirting around the orcs.” Xanthos responds

“Don’t blame me, It’s not my fault Menthos can’t handle combat, and I have to go looking for an elderly, limping, one-eyed orc with hearing problems for us to hunt down and mercy kill.” Kessen retorts

“Why don’t we head back to the Mermist then?” Haimish proposes

“Sounds like a good plan, I hate forests anyway. Feels like you’re being watched constantly.” Turgar answers

“That’s because you are.” Xanthos replies

“Fine, I’ll take us all back there then!” Kessen shouts and heads out into the fens

The tall grasses and insect populations of the fens would have been called a marsh if there was any standing water at all, while the land got regular rainfall, it drained well enough into the Dearthwood to keep standing water at a minimum and it never stayed long enough to provide a regular source of water. 

Kessen waded through the waist high grasses that swayed on the breeze. To Menthos it looked like an ocean waves crashing against the interloper Kessen. The party followed Kessen into the grass and tried to stay within his tracks as they trekked away from the forest. 

“Wait!” Xanthos yelled sniffing the air around him, “I smell orc.”

“Impossible, I would have noticed them by now.” Kessen argued as three arrows penetrate the scout’s leather armor and lodge in his back.

“Looks like you found the ambush anyway.” Haimish calls out

Xanthos advances and spots a group of eight orcs ahead of the party firing from nearly complete cover within the tall grasses. The centaur points out their location to the rest of the party as Turgar yanks the arrow shafts from Kessen’s back.

“Shh… Doopa going to circle round and surprise orcs from the back.” The ogre announces

“Did you get clearance first? I mean we’re not in the Dearthwood anymore, shouldn’t we be finding the local druid union to check on infringement rights or something?” Menthos inquires, as Doopa ignores him and heads off anyway

“There is no druidic presence for the Troll Fens.” Xanthos answers

“Well there ought to be, obviously the orcs are leaving the Dearthwood to ambush the lands surrounding the woods. Sounds like a job for Super Druid!” Menthos replies as four arrows shoot forth from the tree line behind the party two of which hit Xanthos in the rear flank.

“Ambush!” Kessen shouts as he wheels around to look for the archers behind the party

“Oh goodie, more guests at the party. Looks like the scout was looking for a good place for all of us to die.” Menthos 

Kessen moves back towards the tree line and fires up at the general location where he thinks the shots were fired at, as he gets within a few feet of the trees, a group of orcs plow their way out of the woods and race by Kessen, heading straight for the center of the party.

“Behind you!” Kessen shouts as he turns and fires off an arrow at a passing orc. Kessen’s shouting draws the orcs hidden in the trees attention and the scout is felled with six arrows to his chest.

A guttural war cry erupts from the grasses behind the party as four orcs with broadswords slash their way through the cover. Expecting the assault due to Kessen’s alerting, Menthos raises his ring at the charging orcs and dazzles all four of them. Xanthos and Turgar move to flank them and begin to mow them down one by one. 

Six more arrows fly through the air and puncture Xanthos who is bleeding heavily now at the strength begins to drain away from him. Seeing his distress, Turgar turns on his vigor aura staunching the blood flow and unknowingly saving Kessen from death as well.

Doopa reaches the forward archers and quickly disrupts their ranks as his tree trunk of a club scatters the orcs; he manages to take down four of them as the other two escape through the grass. Under fire from the orcs in the trees, Haimish locates the fallen Kessen and drags him back to the rest of the party, Haimish tosses Kessen on the back of Xanthos and the party hastily makes their way west on a intercept course with the High Road. 

“We should probably go back and bury our kills; I think the druids would want it that way. You know balance of life and that sort of thing.” Menthos says sarcastically

“We’d be killed, we got lucky there.” Xanthos answers

“Wouldn’t want any bad karma with the druids, maybe they can reincarnate Kessen as a hot serving wench?” Menthos replies

“He’s not dead, he’s resting.” Haimish explains

“Yeah right, the only reason he hasn’t fallen off Xanthos’ back is because you nailed him to it.” Menthos argues

“Doopa said he did not collect any orc skulls to add to belt of kills.” The ogre interjects remorsely

“Well, there’ll be a fallen log up here you can relieve yourself on. I’d rather not smell rotting orc head and ogre urine while down wind from you; your flatulence is bad enough.” Turgar answers

“Doopa urinate on skull so that no one else takes it.” Doopa explains

“Who would want an orc head with your urine on it?” Turgar questions  

“I would, right next to the bleeding heart of Xanthos and the spineless form of Kessen.” Menthos answers

“No, devil-man can not have Doopa’s fetishes.” Doopa counters

“Don’t need them either; I’ve got enough of my own.” Menthos winks

“That’s not what he meant.” Haimish advises Menthos

“Well, how do I know what he does with them when no one is looking or everyone else is asleep?” Menthos responds

The party marches on and soon the towers of Highcastle are seen ahead on the road, the party goes on high alert as the near death experience from the bandit attack is fresh on their minds. They breathe a sigh of relief as they pass through the west gate and re-enter the city.

The dragon shaman and druid heal up Kessen as best they can, bringing the scout back to consciousness. Haimish decides to head back to the Scholar’s Inn to work on his information gathering techniques. Worried about being left to slowly die, Menthos visits the Temple of Kador to inquire about some liquid healing, while Turgar and Doopa go their separate ways in search of like minded conversationalists.

“How does traipsing through the countryside suit you?” Helle asked

“I quite fancy our abbreviated jaunts through the druid protected orcish wildlife preserve.” Menthos answers

“Really? Set anything on fire?” Helle inquires

“No, but I did light a fire under the centaur’s rear. Maybe now he’ll stop standing on tip toes on his pedestal.” Menthos answers

“Did you secure the vial?” Helle asks

“I told you, I’m not going to steal it from him, I’m not that kind of handsomely roguish teifling. Besides, I’d much rather watch him destroy himself with the item, than have it break in my hands. I have a small resistance to fire, not a resistance to incinerating pyre of volcanism.” Menthos explains

Menthos purchases a couple of cure wounds potions and returns to the Scholar’s Inn where he avoids purchasing more lottery tickets, but still attempts to order the candy ale. A couple of jugglers are performing on stage as Menthos finds a seat next to Xanthos and Kessen.

“Finally decide to grace us with your presence?” Kessen asks

“You weren’t out killing babies were you?” Xanthos inquires

“No, but I did get permission to fry some horse meat.” Menthos answers

“I hear your buddies at the Temple of Kador are in tight with the Overlord, makes you wonder why they don’t have the grandest temple in the city, or aren’t supplementing the local militia with priests.” Kessen ponders aloud

“Whose saying they don’t?” Menthos challenges

“Oh come now, you can’t tell me the Kador temple is outshines the Thellos temple. Thos people know how to spend a coin, maybe you should switch allegiances. Obviously the Kadors aren’t putting it back into their faith.” Kessen replies

“I wouldn’t want to ruin my rock hard abs.” Menthos answers***

The jugglers end their act and Haimish is introduced on stage.

“Evening, thanks for everyone that came. Tonight I thought I do some poetry.”

_In the scheme of things
The bending of knees
Only matters 
When you are with trees

I was shot with an arrow
To the priest I flew like a sparrow
And when he was done
Gold, I had none
So I killed him and took his stuff

The orc hid in the grass
He offered to play
I had to pass
For orc was far too crass_

When he was done he had earned three silver for his efforts.

“Aw crud, looks like I need to work on those.” Haimish states

“Maybe you should work blue?” Menthos offers

“I think maybe you should stick to singing.” Kessen says

“Or I hear motivation speaking is doing really well with fanatics. Maybe you could stir up a little business there?” Menthos offers

“No, I think there’s just too much on my mind right now, with the party coming up and the whole killing an ancient vampire that could put my head through a wall with his snot, just makes for a stressful time. I feel like the kernel of truth under the heel of imagination.” Haimish responds

“Maybe you should cut out the fancy talk, I don’t speak abyssal.” Menthos replies

“Eventually I will be able to shift to form of a virus and then you and I could communicate better.”  Xanthos advises

“No, viruses are so needy and clingy, I’d feel uncomfortable. I’m still waiting for that hot serving wench.” Menthos replies

“I wonder what the ogres are doing.” Haimish asks

“Doopa’s seeing someone about taxidermy and Turgar was going to look into getting us some healing potions.” Kessen replies

“Great, Doopa’s making hand puppets and Turgar’s gone clubbing.” Menthos responds



*** The priests of Thellos are overly obese individuals, as beffitting their god.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Planning your own death*

A worried mind plays havoc with Haimish’s sleep as the bard thinks about what he must attempt to do in a few days. Believing that his life was better not knowing who was pulling your strings, Haimish understands why they can ignorance bliss as it must grant an easier sleep than the truth. 

Morning arrives far too soon for the trueborn as its brilliant light shines through the flimsy linen sheet that doubled as a curtain in his room. Haimish looked about the room and noted that the two ogres had made it back sometime during the evening, he also notes that Menthos is missing, either he left in the middle of the night or woke up before the sunrise. Shrugging his shoulders, Haimish pulls himself out of bed and quietly escapes out the door to his room. 

Ascending the stairs to the main room, Haimish spots Menthos alone at a table enjoying a breakfast of eggs and some kind of meat. Haimish signals for the serving wench to bring him some water at Menthos’ table and proceeds to sit himself at the table.

“What’s that?” Haimish curls his nose up at the sight of the slimy piece of meat-like substance on Menthos’ plate.

“Eel, a ship from Modron docked last night with a load of these, luckily for the Inn, I happen to be a fan of them. This was about the only thing my brother and I would eat o a regular basis.” Menthos explains

“Looks like the inside of a hill giant’s runny nose.” Haimish comments

“Taste’s like it too.” Menthos replies

The serving wench delivers Haimish’s water and the bard requests eggs and potatoes for breakfast. Thanking the bard for his order, the wench excuses herself and returns to the kitchen.

“How do you get up so early?” Haimish inquires

“I don’t know, for the last week I’ve been getting up just before sunrise everyday. It’s really pissing me off to not be able to sleep in.” Menthos responds

“Maybe it has something to do with all that time you spend at the Kador temple?” Haimish offers

“Maybe it has something to do with all the gassing and belching you do in your sleep?” Menthos counters

“No need to turn this personal, I was merely making an observation. Do you not see how their influence could have rubbed off on you?” Haimish asks

“No, I’m not converting and they never talk about that sort of stuff when I’m there anyway.” Menthos counters

“I didn’t know you had a religion to convert from, whom do you follow now?” Haimish inquires

“None of your business. What I am doing at the Kador temple is self-sufficiency training, I notice you’ve not really done anything to prep yourself for the party tomorrow night. Do you think Kalen will just watch you pour sunlight into his drink?” Menthos asks

“I was thinking I would sing a song about lighted drinks and then go around the room casting light spells into people’s drinks, eventually I would reach Kalen, I’d ask for his drink turn around to make his glow like the rest of them, but I would pour the vial into his drink instead.” Haimish advises

“That’s your plan? I’ve seen more planning from an orcish pillaging raid. Besides how are you going to pour the vial and not scream out in pain from the burning?” Menthos asks

“I don’t know, but that’s the best I can think of at the moment, you should have heard the ones I shot down.” Haimish states

“No thanks, I’m eating. Why don’t you give me the vial to hold for you? It doesn’t burn me and that way you can still cast your little spell and I can work on bluffing the ancient undead noble.” Menthos offers

“You really think that will work?” Haimish replied hoping deep down that Menthos would take the dangerous portion of the plan and leave Haimish far out of the way.

“No, were all going to die.” Menthos responded and watched the color drain from the bard’s face, “Well, here’s what I was thinking. You know that long tunnel we found the last day we were down there? I was thinking I would take Doopa and we could enter the party that way and work from the cellar up, while the rest of you worked from the entrance down.” Menthos continued

“Why would you want to come in the back way?” Haimish wondered, “Especially if you’re the one with the vial?” 

“You don’t have to give me the vial, but we’re going to need as much time as possible, and the sooner we find Kalen, the quicker we can adjust the plan if need be.” Menthos replied

Haimish pondered Menthos’ plan for a moment and agreed that it would be better to find Kalen early, although he still wasn’t sold on why Menthos wanted to use the back entrance, Haimish thought if anyone could go it alone, Kessen would be the obvious choice.

“Why wouldn’t you want Kessen to come in from the cellar? Wouldn’t he be a better choice than you? I mean no offence, but I don’t see what talents you have for sneaking around and getting into places. At least Kessen has shown the ability to avoid people when needed.” Haimish inquires

“Because Kalen knows what you look like, he may not know about the rest of us. You need someone to watch your back if Kalen spots you first.” Menthos advises

“I can ask Xanthos to do that.” Haimish responds

“Have you even seen or heard of a druid besting a vampire? It’s always a cleric or a paladin, you’d think if it had happened it would make for a great story and you’d be singing it.” Menthos argues

“Okay, you have a point there.” Haimish concedes

“Besides Kessen can shoot from range, Xanthos’ only ranged attack is whimpering.” Menthos states

“I can tell you don’t like the centaur, at least he knows how to defend himself.” Haimish comments

“I don’t like Turd-guard either, but that won’t stop me from finding him something to do at the party, other than making fun of Doopa.” Menthos responds

The serving wench returns with Haimish’s food, as Menthos gets up from the table.

“Well, I’ve got a full day today. I’ll see you again tonight.” Menthos states as he strolls out of the Inn 

Haimish suddenly feels not so hungry anymore. A small human boy watches the exchange between Haimish and Menthos from the safety of the staircase, as the teifling leaves the boy rises and strides towards Haimish.

“Hello good sir, is this sit taken?” A well dressed noble looking elf asks Haimish

The bard looks up at the elf and then around at the multitude of empty tables in the main room, “Why do you wish to sit here? There are plenty of empty tables available, plus I’m would not be good company this morning.” Haimish replies shaking his head

“Nonsense human, you are just the man I was looking for.” The elf speaks

The hairs along Haimish’s arm stand up as the internal warning system inside the bard’s brain goes off that this is probably Kalen come to inquire about the Soul Gem. Haimish’s eyes quickly dart about the room looking for the nearest escape or barring that the nearest elderly or crippled person he could run by to slow Kalen down. Looking back at the elf, Haimish instead sees the form of a young street urchin.

“Xanthos! You had me planning my escape and flight from the city!” Haimish yells as he flings some potatoes at the shifter.

“Ha! What did you think of my disguise? I’ve spent some time researching past graduates from the School of Ancient Knowledge and I found Eryuntheal Fellitherian an elven graduate from nearly a century ago.” The excited boy tells Haimish

“Very good, I thought you were the vampire.” Haimish concedes

“Well after tomorrow night I’ll be able to look like one at least.” The boy smiles back at Haimish, “What did Menthos want?” 

“Oh, he had a plan for getting the liquid sun into the drink of Kalen. I’m just no so sure about his plan.” Haimish relates Menthos’ plan to Xanthos

“Sounds like he wants all the glory himself, you didn’t give him the vial did you?” Xanthos asks

“No, although I did like that part of the equation.” Haimish answers

“Well, here’s what I was thinking. We all get in and stake out a room, I can mingle as the elven graduate returned to see the old school. Once I get a location on Kalen, I can signal you guys and we can plan from there.” Xanthos explains

“I guess that’s safer than moving as a group, but what if Kalen spots me first?” Haimish inquires

“Did you tell him you would be at the party?” Xanthos asks

“I don’t think so, I can’t remember.” Haimish answers

“Then that would be a problem, maybe we should search in two person teams?” Xanthos suggests

“That would be safer.” Haimish agrees

“We’ll run it by everyone tonight, right now I’m off to perfect the elf and work on some more of his background.” Xanthos says and the little boy scurries out of the Inn.

Suddenly feeling isolated and alone, Haimish decides to take a walk around Highcastle instead of finishing his breakfast. The bard exits the Scholar’s Inn and turns east, he walks for a few blocks before spotting the form of the city’s amphitheater. Haimish stares quietly at the structure.

Sighing, Haimish continues on and finds himself in front of the Bard’s College door. For three days he’s walked past this door stopping each time but not having the courage to knock, and while today was no different the door opened without a knock.

“Oh sorry sir, I didn’t know you where standing out here.” A middle-aged man says as he steps through from the College and shakes out a dirty welcome mat

Haimish stands there unmoving and unable to speak. A feeling of knowing his life would end in a mere forty-two hours pressed hard upon his vocal cords.

“Is this something I can help you with? Usually we don’t do tours until afternoon, but I’ve got some time to kill this morning would you like one?” The man asks

Haimish didn’t remember agreeing to one, but found himself stepping through the threshold anyway. 

On the other side of the city, Menthos again entered the Temple of Kador. Today, Helle had promised the teifling a lesson on how the Pyromancers of Kador used solid and liquid fire for weapons and defense of their citadel on the elemental plane of fire and the quasi-plane of magma.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Preparation G*

The morning of the party arrives; Haimish again did not get much sleep if any. Doopa as well did not get any sleep, his nose constantly picking up the scent of fear from Haimish, kept his adrenalin levels too high to get any restful sleep. Menthos however slept hard and slept in.

Xanthos awoke first and after hearing of Menthos’ plan yesterday, decided he wanted to take a quick look at the secret entrance they found a week and a half ago. Changing to the form of an owl, Xanthos ascends into the fall sky, still dark enough to be called night but lighting up to the east, the direction he flew.

Xanthos flew over the ruins first, and glimpsed a bevy of movement below. All sorts of food items and linens were being taken out of carriages and brought below, amidst the ever watching eyes of four large ogres and six large trolls. Xanthos glided past them and then turned southeast, after a few miles he located the cliff he sought. 

Twisting in a slow circle upon the updraft, Xanthos spies a small camp site just outside the cave entrance, curious, he dives in low and now picks up the faint smell of smoke and sees a thin trail of the odiferous substance rising from the wet remains of a burnt log. Xanthos loops in the air and aims for the cave, hoping that whatever was at the campsite was still in the tunnel somewhere.

Xanthos hoped to catch proof that Menthos had already led the Temple of Kador here and that they were planning a raid on the party when it would do the most damage. Xanthos didn’t like Menthos and didn’t trust the Kadors and that just made for a bad recipe. As the druid neared the entrance, his owl senses spied a dozen small green feet, confused Xanthos pulled up to avoid flying into the tunnel, just as a dozen arrow shafts spring forth from the hidden bows attached to those feet. The arrows all miss Xanthos, but the attack left him shaken and disturbed. Xanthos rose on the updraft and headed back to Highcastle with his findings.

“So, the goblins never left, they just went to the escape tunnels and are waiting there to retake their home? Probably tonight? Great! There goes my planning right out the latrine.” Haimish bemoans

“No, it’s worse than that.” Menthos objects

“How could it be any worse?” Xanthos inquires

“You guys really need to get out more; it’s been in the paper for the last four days. A group of goblins calling themselves The Raiders have offered a 500gp reward for the capture alive or dead of the adventurers responsible for decimating their tribe ten days ago.” Menthos relates

Turgar springs from his chair and rushes outside the Scholar’s Inn looking for a street vendor.

“Damn, if I knew it would only take the truth to get him to leave, I would’ve told him how ugly he is days ago.” Menthos comments

“What are we going to do now?” Haimish wallows

“You should’ve told us this when you saw it! Look what you’ve done to the poor man.” Kessen states pointing at Haimish

“What? They’re goblins. Who cares?” Menthos responds

“They apparently have received some training else why would they call themselves a proper name?” Xanthos asks

“Just because you can change into a satyr, doesn’t mean I’m going to come looking for you for honeymoon tips.” Menthos insinuates

“I fail to see your logic.” Xanthos states

“Just because they call themselves something, doesn’t mean they’re good at it. Look at Kessen; he calls himself a scout but is he any good at it?” Menthos replies

Kessen slams a fist into the back of Menthos’ head, causing the teifling to lose consciousness and his head to plop into his breakfast of oatmeal, “Scouted out the back of your head pretty good there didn’t I!” Kessen shouts as he stands up from the table and shoves his chair to the floor then exits the Inn amid stares from other patrons.

“Won’t he drown like that?” Haimish asks looking at the submerged head of Menthos

“Yes.” Xanthos says looking away at the entrance for Turgar to return

“Shouldn’t someone save him?” Haimish asks

Xanthos feigns deafness and ignores Haimish’s question as Doopa is distracted, retrieving a nose goblin from the back of his throat through his nose with two fingers. Their serving wench stops by and fills their cups with water and removes Menthos’ head from the bowl and drops it onto the table. Menthos’ sputters and spits out oatmeal as his head’s collision with the table has jarred him awake.

“Wha?” Menthos asks

“Wha indeed.” Haimish answers

Turgar flings open the Inn door and shouts, “They’re not selling the paper yet, we need to get one from yesterday!”

The table looks around for anyone with a paper; Doopa spots a halfling at the table behind him reading a paper. The ogre reaches back and snatches the paper from the halfling’s hands.

“Hey! What’s the big idea? Get your own you %&*@@#! Jerk. Give that back!” The Halfling shouts

Doopa stands up and puffs out his chest, “Doopa need to use toilet thank you for letting me borrow paper.” He says in his most intimidating voice

The Halfling stares up at the barbarian, small bones and discarded scraps of long forgotten meals dangle in the face of the small man. The stench of unwashed ogre and dung gag the halfling’s nostrils and the man sits back in his chair, “fine keep the thing, I’ll get another.”

The party stares on in bewilderment as Doopa hands over the halfling’s paper.

“Wench! I need a new menu!” The Halfling shouts as Doopa hands the halfling’s former menu to Haimish

“No thanks, I already ordered.” Haimish replies

Menthos cleans himself up and heads out into the day, telling Doopa he’ll be back shortly after lunch to pick him up for their journey to the secret tunnel.

Menthos’ first stop is the warlock store front.

“Do you have any items that might assist me in a tunnel, battling about a dozen or so motivated goblins?” Menthos asks

The gnome silently rocks back and forth while his brain goes through the store’s inventory, “Have you my patented pit finder?”

“No, all I ever got from you was a dwarven ale chute and a whole lot of grief.” Menthos says

“Ah, I wondered where that thing finally went to, I was looking for it the other day and thought someone stole it, I guess I wasn’t far off.” The gnome states

“What? You sold it to me for 171 gold.” Menthos complains

“Highway robbery at that price.” The gnome replies

“Yeah, well based upon our last meeting, I’m thinking I’m going to be walking out of here with a pit finder.” Menthos laments

“You could do worse for yourself; let me demonstrate it’s usefulness in preparing your body for a fall.” The gnome starts

“Wait. What? I thought you said it was a pit finder shouldn’t that mean it helps me find them so I can avoid them?” Menthos asks

“You’d think that wouldn’t you.” The gnome answers, “Let me strap this onto you like so and we’ll get down to business.” 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. This seems a little too kinky for me; you’re not strapping anything to me so we can get down to business.” Menthos protests

“Shut-up bitch of Skarn.” The gnome replies

“Hey, leave my patron out of this!” Menthos objects

Twenty minutes later the gnome rocked slowly back and forth in his rocking chair, smoking an imported brand of pipeweed, “Try it again, this time you have to remember to bounce it a little more after you come in contact with the floor. The secret is to be able to check every six inches and to do that you need to make sure you’re bending on each step and in-between.” The gnome coaches

Menthos felt silly with a harness around his abdomen and a ten foot metal pole attached at a forty-five degree angle, its end resting just above the shop’s floor, “This is really stupid.” 

“No, what’s stupid is you falling into a pit trap in a goblin warren while the rest of your party merrily skips by all the while laughing at you and your misfortune, while you spend two days climbing out of that piss hole, only to discover your fellow friends have looted the place silly and left you with a flaming bag of goblin dung.” The gnome blasts

“You’ve got some serious deep rooted emotional issues, I think you should find a couch and lay down. I could bluff up a good psychiatric doctor for you.” Menthos offers

The gnome stops rocking and gets a pained look on his face

“Or not.” Menthos finishes.

Menthos tries another thirty minutes to get the hang of it, but just can’t seem to get it right, looking over the contraption, he gets an idea. Loosing the support along the bottom of the harness, Menthos pushes the contraption down to his waist, where he tightens it again.

“What are you doing?” The gnome inquires

“Look! I now have a ranged pregnancy attack!” Menthos laughs, “I’m totally getting this now.” 

Amid a flurry of objections, Menthos overpays for the Pit Finder and walks out of the store 254 gold lighter than when he walked in, although not with the Pit Finder attached.

Menthos then heads to the Temple of Kador, where he meets with Helle and informs him of the goblin squatters at the tunnel entrance.

“Do not fret; I planned for resistance at some point. I will be bringing a pentagonal force along with me, I assure you a couple of fireballs and there won’t be a goblin resistance.” Helle explains

“Your foresight amazes me, are you bringing five pyromancers or five near death suicide fodder?” Menthos inquires

Helle laughs and introduces the five that will be joining him. Menthos’ eyes wander over each man until resting on the last individual, a female in full plate, “And what’s your name?”

“I am Fyrhe Delengrade; I have been looking forward to this mission all week. I will not let you down.” The woman answers

Menthos gives Helle a quizzical look, after the woman implied that Menthos was leading this mission for the Temple of Kador.

“They are all up and comers in the Temple, this exercise will weed out those not fit to serve the Reign of Fire.” Helle answers

Satisfied with that answer, Menthos turns back to the female and raises her visor, “You’re pretty hot in that.” 

“I welcome the fire, it cleanses my sins.” Fyrhe answers

“That wasn’t a question.” Menthos replies, the woman gives him an odd look

“I meant you look sexy in a full metal jacket.” Menthos tries again

“I bet you say that to all the girls.” Fyrhe responds

“Only the hot ones.” Menthos answers

“Menthos, the cloistered know no one of the opposite sex until their training is complete.” Helle states

“Oh I know.” Menthos answers slowly rapping his fingers upon his ten foot metal pole, “Oh, I’ll be bringing an ogre friend of mine, I figure he’s good for a few rounds of soaking up melee attacks while we get down to business.” 

“A fine plan indeed, shall we leave then? Please lead the way Menthos Lyptus. May the burning desire of Kador immolate our enemies this day.” Helle states

“Amen” The Kador priests respond once Helle is finished.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Dark Speech*

Menthos, Doopa, and the Kadorians left Highcastle just after three in the afternoon. It would be a five hour trek to the secret entrance and then another three hours of walking the tunnel to get back to the party. Menthos figured an hour of killing and looting goblins would fit in just right for them to be in the party near midnight. 

Halfway into the walk, Helle struck up a conversation.

“I appreciate your willingness to allow us to accompany you. Kador will see a sight tonight.” Helle states, the acolytes shout “Amen” in unison at the end of his sentence.

“It’s not a bother, besides, a couple of fireballs are just the reality a bunch of ego stroking goblins need to wash down their throat of denial. Then again, it gives me a chance to test the mettle of that fire fox Fyrhe.” Menthos answers

“I wish you luck in that endeavor then.” Helle replies

“I don’t need luck; I have a ten foot pole.” Menthos giggles

“Doopa not know why Menthos needs giant toothpick to get armor off girlfriend.” The ogre speaks; startling Menthos who hadn’t heard him approach from behind

“Heh, you’re pretty wily there Doops, but I don’t need this pole to break her hard outer shell, I need the pole.” Menthos tried to think of a word the ogre was sure to have not heard before, “to go spelunking.”

“What’s that?” Doopa asked

“It’s when you go lunking with a spiel, all the rangers are doing it, and it’s the latest in dwarf fashion.” Menthos answers, a confused Doopa slows down and scratches his head trying to force his brain into grasping Menthos’ meaning.

“Why again is he here?” Helle inquired

“You’ll see I need a big enough distraction that I can create and use initially, but that will continue to cause distractions long after I discontinue its use.” Menthos replied

Menthos sped up to walk side by side Fyrhe.

“So what time do you get off work tonight?” Menthos asked

“I do not go off duty.” Fyrhe replies

“Oh come on now, surely you have to eat, sleep, use the latrine?” Menthos inquires

“Yes, but I remain ever vigilant while doing so. My goal is to follow in Ailena’s footsteps and command my on force of righteousness for Kador.” She stated

“Wouldn’t that include practicing your healing technique? There’s got to be some wounds you’ve never had to heal before.” Menthos stated

“I am not a healer; you will need to speak with Helle if you are injured.” Fyrhe responds

“Oh, so you like the rough stuff, I’m down with that. I’m told the flame of Kador burns with more passion than a thousand year love story.” Menthos continues while swinging his metal pole from his left hip, “I see you’ve noticed my pole, I’m looking for someone to test that passion theory of Kador’s out. You wouldn’t know anyone I could speak to about that, seeing as how you’re the “Y” to my Yin Yang?”

Although she didn’t reply Menthos noticed the subtle change in her breathing from focused to annoyed, and if her could get her unfocused, then he could get her other places too. Menthos returned to alongside Helle.

“I don’t think she’s going to ace the program.” Menthos whispered

_“No, but you are.” _ Helle thought to himself

A half hour from the tunnel, the group slowed to try and figure out a way to approach the entrance without being noticed until they were within spell range. With the entrance being at the bottom of a cliff face, they though the best way would be to get to the cliff as quickly as possible and then approach from the west side of the entrance staying as close to the rock face as possible. 

Once they were within a couple hundred feet of the tunnel, Menthos turned to Doopa to begin his plan.

“Go kill some goblins Doopa, they’re all yours.” Menthos said pointing towards the tunnel entrance

Doopa rushed forward, a blood raging scream escaped from his lips as the muscled man leaped into the air and cam crashing down in from of the entrance ready to pounce on the first sign of movement. Doopa peered through the darkness looking for anything other than rock. It took his ogre brain a couple of seconds to realize that’s exactly what he was staring at.

Menthos saw Doopa’s shoulders relax and the ogre stood up from his crouch and reached out with his club and began to prod at something hidden from all but Doopa just inside the opening.

“What is it?” Menthos asked

“There’s no tunnel.” Came Doopa’s reply

The party raced up to Doopa, Menthos whizzed every kind of scenario through his head as he tried to come up with a plan “B” that would get them to the party on time if in fact there was no tunnel.

The group skidded to a stop next to Doopa and saw the clear signs of a tunnel roof collapse, along with several scrapes and scratches along the wall and ceiling just in front of the collapse.

“Looks like your goblins didn’t want to be bothered. Not a problem, we’ll just have to give them a little surprise.” Helle said as he smiled

The Pyromancer walked up and stood directly in front of the collapse; he raised his arms out wide and then looked back to the rest of the group, “You might want to back up.” 

The Kador acolytes back up beyond thirty feet from Helle as Doopa and Menthos stand pat and watch Helle work. There were two sounds; one from Helle’s mouth, the other seemed to come from the tunnel collapse itself. Menthos had never heard the word that erupted from Helle’s lips, by he was sure it was vulgar and that made Menthos all the more eager to learn what it was. The rock blocking the tunnel seemed to respond back to Helle, only instead of a coherent word, the rocks crumbled into pebbles and dust.

Menthos whistles as the blockage has been removed from the tunnel, he takes a step forward to get a better look and realizes that even the ground he was standing on as been cracked and the first few inches of dirt crumble beneath his steps.

“What did man say?” Doopa asks, Menthos just shrugs his shoulders

“Doopa thought he said Catherine.” The ogre answers his own question

“Must be an ex-girlfriend, maybe she had an open door policy?” Menthos replies

“Come on.” Helle waves on the group, as he does so Menthos catches a glimpse of Helle’s face and notices that Helle’s face has changed. His veins show black beneath his skin and his eyes are cat-like and glow red, taken aback, Menthos hesitates.

“It will pass, let’s go kill some goblins.” Helle states, that gets Doopa motivates and he charges forward into the tunnel.

Menthos pauses another second and then follows suit.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> The party stares on in bewilderment as Doopa hands over the halfling’s paper.
> 
> “Wench! I need a new menu!” The Halfling shouts as Doopa hands the halfling’s former menu to Haimish




That bit was hilarious. Is that you misinforming the player or the player doing a good job of RPing a low Wisdom?



> “A fine plan indeed, shall we leave then? Please lead the way Menthos Lyptus. May the burning desire of Kador immolate our enemies this day.” Helle states




His name is _really_ Menthos Lyptus? Does he come complete with penetrating vapors?


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> That bit was hilarious. Is that you misinforming the player or the player doing a good job of RPing a low Wisdom?
> 
> 
> 
> His name is _really_ Menthos Lyptus? Does he come complete with penetrating vapors?




That was a "I look around for anyone reading the paper"

Me: There's a halfling seated behind you looking over some papers

Player: "I take it and dare him to do something about it."

Me: "As you wish."   

Yep, that's his full name, his last character was Tehas Baggerous (you can see all the references to his brother in the story hour) and of course before Tehas he was Paquito Flaccido


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Bluff on, bluff off*

They entered the tunnel and found evidence of a recent goblin presence; discarded rodent bones, feces, soot marks along the tunnel’s ceiling, but no bodies. Cautiously advancing up the tunnel, they spot numerous barefoot goblin tracks, and even a discarded spear shaft. However, three miles into the tunnel with light beginning to glow from ahead and the faint sound of organized chaos, Menthos and Helle realized that they’d arrived near the end of the tunnel and were close to the party. 

Grrrgggrr

An alien sound echoed through the quiet passageway.

“What was that? Light!” Helle spoke and the dim glow on his holy symbol flared up washing the tunnel with a reddish light for thirty feet up and down the tunnel.

Nothing new was revealed in the light.

Grrrggrgr

The sound was right on top of them

“It must be on some weird demi-plane, my holy light isn’t revealing the creature to me.” Helle spoke low to Menthos

“Maybe that’s because the creature is in Doopa’s stomach.” Menthos replied sarcastically

“Doopa sorry, Menthos not say it would take all day!” Doopa pleaded

“That’s annoying; we got to get him something to eat.” Helle replied

“Don’t you priestly types have spells for that?” Menthos responded

“Other priests do, my spells don’t do that.” Helle replied truthfully

Helle’s meaning is lost on Menthos as the teifling prepares to enact his plan.

Meanwhile topside, Kessen, Haimish, and Turgar enter the party. Xanthos in disguise as an upper end middle-aged well-to-do elf arrives via an opulent carriage. He exits and hands the first ogre he encounters his invitation.

“Greetings my large fellow, I’m am Lord Delhaunt of House Silverleaf.” Xanthos announces

“So?” the ogre responds

“Shouldn’t you announce me to the Lord of the party, as is customary in these civilized parts?” Xanthos states

“Oh, Hey Morty!” The ogre shouts

“What!” A hunchbacked troll shouts back

“Lord Delhump is here to meet the Lord of the party.” The ogre replies

“Excuse me that’s not my na.” Xanthos attempts to correct the ogre

“So?!” The troll shouts back 

“Pass it on!” The ogre replies

“There, you’ve been annunciated get downstairs before I throw you downstairs.” The ogre instructs 

“Such rudeness from such a simple creature, I shall have you reported to the slave master at once.” Xanthos huffs

“Yeah, you do that fairy. Be sure you tell them where to find me.” The ogre answers as he shoves Xanthos forward

Xanthos reaches the bottom of the steps and the smell of cooking and wine permeate his senses. He quickly notes the rest of the topside party ahead of him pushing their way into the hallway beyond the cloak room (former room where the three goblins were cooking rabbit). The walls were covered in tapestries, most of which looked like they could bankroll an entire war. 

Xanthos picked out a waist endowed opulent looking human male who appeared to be alone and made his approach to him.

“Hello good sir, I was wondering if you knew whether Lord De Lite had arrived yet?” Xanthos asked

“Who? Don’t know him. Who are you?” The man asked

“I sir am Lord Delhaunt of House Silverleaf, returned to visit my teachers at the School of Ancient knowledge.” Xanthos responds

“You a merchant?” The man asks

“No, as I explained, I am from the …” Xanthos noted the man lost interest and wondered away immediately after the word “no”

The rest of the topside party moved from room to room looking for Lord De Lite, Haimish stopped in each room to listen to the minstrels play in each room. In the farthest room from the entrance (a room not entered by the party when they were here last) Haimish watched as a slave girl danced to a whirling beat inside a circle of merchants. Her hair whipped about her as she twirled and bounced around the circle, she’d stop every so often and tease the man she stopped in front of. Haimish recalled seeing the trick before in his adopted homeland. He wondered how much merchant money the “slave” girl would be walking out of the dance with tonight.

“Ooh a professional dancer?” Kessen asked

“Oh she’s professional alright, but not really a dancer, think sticky fingers.” Haimish answered

Xanthos decided to try a different tactic and attempted to move near different conversations, subtly changing his skin tone to blend in with his surroundings, he would try to listen first before speaking.

As Xanthos moved out of the cloak room and into the hallway, he felt someone brush against him from behind. He turned to look back and as he did he heard the words “The pieces are in place sister, strike when the well is hot, listen for the call of the moon.” Xanthos spin his head around but there was no one near enough to him to be considered good suspects for the speaker, perplexed, he continued onward.

Below, Menthos led his party near the edge of light. Smells of roast pig and pheasant wafted into the hallway, along with the smell of citrus and aging vegetable matter as Menthos spied a large pile of refuse near the end of the tunnel. Doopa’s stomach told Menthos that quick action would be needed before the barbarian raged his way into the kitchen and ruined any surprise element. 

“What’s the plan?” Helle inquired

“I don’t have one, I thought we’d be chasing goblins all the way here and then we could bluff our way in with a chasing the uninvited goblins out story, I didn’t think I’d need a plan B.” Menthos answered

The disappointed look on Helle’s face was quickly turning to frustration. Menthos wondered how long he could keep both the trigger happy priests and the starving ogre at bay. Feeling the temperature rise behind him, Menthos decided to act now instead of after a barrage of fireballs.

“Come on Doopa, the rest of you stay here.” Menthos advised

“What? Where are you going?” Helle pressed

“I’ll be back for you.” Menthos stated and left the Kadors in the tunnel

Bursting into the bustling kitchen came a wild-eyed ogre and a thin teifling; they stood out like a demon in Olympus as the kitchen staff were all garbed in white shirts, white pants, and white aprons, with white poofy hats on their heads. Dirtied from their miles of walking through a dirt tunnel and then through the heap of garbage piled at the tunnel entrance the two definitely did not look like they belonged.

“Excuse me, no one but staff is allowed down here! Guards!” A cook shouts

“What? Don’t you know who this is?” Menthos asks incredulously

“No, I do not and you’re not supposed to be down here! Guards!” The cook shouts again

“This is the ……. Overlord’s taste tester, come to inspect the food before he arrives at the party.” Menthos wings it

“You lie, I happen to know the Overlord’s personal food tester is a halfing.” The cook contends

“Oh sure, in the palace, but he’s too valuable to let out of the palace. Kidnappings and assassinations notwithstanding, that’s why he employs expendables for when he travels outside the palace.” Menthos answers

The cook opened mouth to reply, but caught himself as he realized the teifling’s words were logical before carefully selecting his next statement. “Why wasn’t I informed of this?”

“So you wouldn’t put the poison in the food after we arrived, or maybe charm him, or interrogate him, or bribe him, all before we got here. Duh!” Menthos answered

“Hmm, yes I see your point on that, but I simply can’t have an ogre running around my kitchen eating food. It’s not sanitary.” The cook replies

“He’ll sit on the floor next to the open pit, in fact if you drop food on the way upstairs, throw it at him and he’ll still test it. The only thing better than an ogre food tester is a troll one and we both know how much that would cost.” Menthos says while winking knowingly at the cook

“I don’t know about this, let me see your credentials.” The cook asked

“First yours, how do we even know you’re a cook. Have you been taught the fine art of hygiene? Do you know the optimal temperature to keep a rack of pork ribs at, when cooked over an open fire of oak and cherry wood? How about the number of times you should wash your hands after handling the liver of a Dusk Giant?” Menthos retorted

Stalemated the cook and Menthos stare each other down.

“Sir.” A lithe human female called out to the cook, “the guests report this has a bad taste to it.” 

The cook turns and eyes the woman, before getting an idea. “Here have the supposed food tester try this, if he can tell me what’s wrong with it. I’ll believe your story.”

“Fine.” Menthos answered and took the glass of dark colored liquid from the cook’s hand. Menthos swirled the liquid around the inside of the glass, then sniffed the contents. “He can’t drink that.”

“Why? Because you’re imposters!” The cook shouts

“No, because goblins urinated in your wine supply.” Menthos answered

The disbelieving cook grabbed the glass from Menthos’ hand and took a swig of the liquid, then retched and spat it out. Gasps erupted from the gathered kitchen help.

“Crack open the reverses of wine and get Ohlsen to go into town for more, this stuff’s no good.” The cook hacked 

Menthos opened his arms before Doopa, who grabbed the roasting pig off of the spit with one hand and then cracked open it’s abdomen along the sternum and pulled the ribcage apart, “Ribs” was the only intelligible word that Doopa got out before he tore into the meat.

“That’s amazing, how’d he do that?” Fyhre asked

“It was Atlantean wine, it’s very delicate. Vigorous swirling or shaking of a bottle cause the whole bottle to go bad and taste like urine.” Helle replied

“He’s brilliant.” Fyhre’s admiration was beginning to melt through her steel façade

“That’s why Kador thinks he has potential.” Helle replied

“Do you think he’ll learn the words?” Fyhre inquires

“One task at a time.” Helle answers her

Menthos bows to the hidden priests and then makes his way around the pit heading for the stairs up to the first floor.

“Where are you going? You can’t just leave him down here unattended.” The cook protests

“What? He’s fine, I assure you he’s not going anywhere for a long time.” Menthos smiles and turns back around amid continued protests from the cook

As he reaches the far side of the pit, Menthos catches a glint of steel in the darkened stairway. Followed quickly by the twitching body of a male waiter as he is dragged bleeding from the throat by an elven female dressed in all black studded leather.

_Great_, thought Menthos, _we’re not the only ones here with a mission it seems. Although she did look good in that leather and studded is how I like ‘em._

Unseen by Menthos is the obese form of a Thellios priest as he too sinks away from the staircase and follows the assassin down a short hallway to the left of the stairs and through a barred door.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*All hell's breaking loose*

Menthos creeps to the hallway the assassin dragged the dead body down, it ends with a closed stone door. Menthos can feel a cold breeze blowing from around the gaps in the door frame and concludes it must be a makeshift walk-in freezer. He tries the handle and finds it is not locked, opening the door slowly he feels the blast of icy air wash down the hallway. Racks of pigs and sides of beef hang silently; Menthos begins to step inside the freezer when he notices a small blood trail winding from the door back to the far right corner of the room. The faint phosphorescent light coming off the natural moss on the ceiling gives the tiefling’s vision an image of two men one slumped over against the wall, the other standing over the slumped man, frantically stripping him of his clothing, both men appear to be identical or nearly identical silhouettes. 

A low shuffling sound, not unlike a foot being slowly dragged across stone, emanates from a space next to Menthos. Startled, Menthos looks up at the two figures, the slumped one has fallen over on his side while the upright one has turned to look directly at Menthos. Menthos pushes on the door to widen the gap; however it hit’s something solid that prevents him for opening it any farther. The upright silhouette begins walking toward Menthos.

“Sorry to have interrupted you, I know how exciting meat lockers can be on the libido.” Menthos says as he closes the door, and then hurriedly searches through his pockets for a thin piece of metal. 

Producing a fork, Menthos bites off one of the prongs and quickly locks the door from the outside, taking the prong he jabs it into the keyhole. He then rams the pommel of his longsword into the keyhole for good measure, “that ought to do it.” Menthos says aloud.

“Hey! What are you doing down there?” It was the head chef again

“I’m trying to open this door, it’s stuck.” Menthos replies

“By beating on it with your sword?” The chef asks incredulously

“I’m a health inspector dammit, not a rogue. I can’t figure how it’s supposed to open.” Menthos answers

The head chef starts down the hallway as the door’s handle turns in Menthos’ palm, the teifling applies all the pressure he can muster but is unable to stop the handle from turning.

“Step aside, I have the key.” The head chef commands

Menthos hesitates, not wanting to let go of the handle.

“Move!” The chef yells and shoves Menthos out of the way

The door handle flies up, but Menthos’ jam job holds and the door fails to open to whoever is shoving on the other side. Bone-jarring thuds are heard against the door as the chef steps back confused

“Is somebody in there?” The chef shouts as he tries to get the key in the door, only to find it no longer fits, “this is the right key, I don’t understand.” 

“Let me go get someone from security, they’re bound to have a crowbar or some manpower to pry this door off.” Menthos states

“What about the ogre?” The chef inquires

“Nah, he’s only good for one thing and if I tell him what’s behind this door, not only will he open it but you won’t have anything left to serve.” Menthos answers

“Hurry then, they’ll freeze in there.” The chef commands

Menthos runs to the stairs leading up to the party level and as soon as he’s gone up a couple of steps and is out of sight from the freezer door, he slows to a nonchalant walk and pushes the thought of finding someone to open the door out of his mind. Whistling an old orc battle tune, he mingles with the other guests as he emerges from the stairs.

Meanwhile the rest of the party members catch a minstrel show put on by a thri-keen, while Haimish marvels at the creatures ability to play three instruments at once the rest of the party wanders the large gathered group looking for Lord De’ Lite.

Xanthos’ shifted ears pick up bits of conversation none of them however include Lord De’ Lite’s name, Xanthos works his way out of the room and spies Menthos heading towards him. Xanthos waves him down to get his attention, Menthos however walks by without noticing. Xanthos reaches out and grabs his arm to stop him as he passes in front of the shifter.

“Hey, hey, hey. I’m not one of the help; go find a servant to annoy!” Menthos tells the elf as he rips his arm from the elf’s grasp

“Menthos it’s me, Xanthos” 

“How do you know my name?! Charlatan! Witch! Doppelganger” Menthos yells and points at the wealthy dressed elf

The guests in close proximity to Menthos and Xanthos turn to look at what the dirty dressed teifling was yelling about. Thoroughly annoyed, Xanthos tries to back away from Menthos and leave the immediate area, however now several people had been looking directly at him and he feared his cover was blown especially if Lord De’ Lite was in the room disguised.

Menthos walked on uncaring of the opinions floating around him, “Ha, ha, loser.” Menthos thought as he found Haimish, Turgar and Kessen taking in the minstrel show. 

“I will never understand this modern music, who would listen to a bug play a harp?” Menthos asks aloud

‘Shh! The man is brilliant.” A guest turns and tells him

“Man? Looks like an enlarged starving cockroach, where’s a hill giant when you need a big shoe.” Menthos comments

The thri-keen finishes up and the people start to file out of the room, Menthos catches the rest of the party and informs them of Doopa’s whereabouts and of the assassin locked in the freezer.

“I think we should interrogate this assassin and see what she knows.” Kessen suggests, Haimish and Turgar agree. “And keep an eye out for Xanthos, we lost him a couple rooms back.”

“He’s busy doing damage control, someone shouted doppelganger so he went to investigate.” Menthos explains

As the group exits the room, Haimish catches a glimpse of a small green figure slashing into the calf of a party guest and then disappearing down the hallway away from the damage. The man reaches done for his calf and pulls his blood soaked hands away.

“I’ve been stabbed!” Was all the man ever got out as he began to convulse and crumpled to the floor

Haimish alerted the present group members about the goblin, “looks like a poisoned blade too.”

But, as the party began to force their way through the throng of startled guests, Kessen stops them, “What is this is a diversion? One goblin cuts a random man’s leg? Too fishy for me.”

The party considers his words and agrees, they turn around and begin flowing with the mass of people streaming away from the murder scene. Up ahead near the entrance, Xanthos was fuming over Menthos’ comments and trying to calm himself down before returning to his mission. He spots three large minotaurs coming down the entrance steps and exiting the entry room. The minotaurs are dressed as city guard but Xanthos spots a tattoo on the backs of each of their right hands. Recognizing the tattoo as the mark of Carnak god of slaughter, Xanthos decides to follow this new development instead as there seems to be quite a few people running away from the center of the party further down the hallway.

The minotaurs’ wide bodies force the party guests to squeeze against the walls as the minotaurs walk side by side through the hallways and finally to the steps leading down to the kitchen area. Xanthos prepares to follow them but is met with the rest of the party who inform him of the goblin’s attack, Xanthos relates the minotaur appearance and the party starts downstairs.

Screams and the sounds of breaking dishes erupt from the kitchen area the party hustles down the stairs to find the minotaurs cutting down the kitchen staff and have backed the remaining survivors into a hallway off the pit area that leads to the small cooking stoves and the food preparation areas, the party knew there was no escape from that area.

Doopa sat absentmindedly poking a dead waiter, “W-a-t-e-r, Doopa want water.” Doopa looks up as Menthos calls out his name, the ogre waves to the rest of the party, it is only then does he notice the carnage that just transpired around him. Wondering how he had noticed the minotaurs, he remembered he was eating a particularly good piece of lamb. It’s juices were dripping down his chin and the smokiness from the fire made his mouth water, he momentarily forgot about the minotaurs and began looking for more lamb, then remembered he was thirsty.

The party engaged the minotaurs from behind as Doopa looked around for something to hit them with, forgetting where he had laid his club down at, he finally decided on a burning piece of hickory from the fire pit. The footing was treacherous as the fallen bodies and pooling blood made traversing the distance to the minotaurs slippery at best and nearly impossible without bigger feet at worst. 

The minotaurs had blocked the rest of the kitchen help from escaping, a lone kobold and a mangy dog began to direct fleeing servants into hiding places within the kitchen, and the kobold then turned his sling on the minotaurs to divert their attentions on him instead.

The party managed to end the minotaur threat before any further loss of life occurred, Xanthos striped the bodies looking for further signs of duplicity.

“I assure you they are deceased.” The kobold spoke

“I assure you you’re living because of us, what are you doing here?” Menthos asked

“I’m helping with the party, me and lunch here spotted the three brutes heading down the hall, so we funneled the people into hidey places.” The kobold replied

“Good thinking, but I don’t think these guys were part of the party guys.” Xanthos spoke

“Duh! Are you sure? They look like part of pleasure show, or maybe a jug band?” Menthos replied

“I haven’t forgotten what you did upstairs, you nearly blew my cover with that stunt!” Xanthos retorts

“Hey, I just found a doppelganger down here, I couldn’t be sure if it was you or not.” Menthos responds

“Doopa found leg of lamb, it was good.” The ogre interjects

“Where is this doppelganger?” Kessen inquires

“Locked in the freezer, I’ll show you.” Menthos answers and begins to lead the party back towards the freezer.

Helle and the pyromancers are waiting for them when they exit the hallway from the food preparation area.

“What happened?” Helle inquires

“Bunch of Carnak followers, see for yourself.” Xanthos informs him

“Yep, there’s a mangy kobold down there with his dog that seems out of place too.” Menthos advises

“I shall investigate.” Helle replies and heads towards the battle scene

He motions for the pyromancers to stop at the minotaur bodies and search them, Helle then continues onward towards the kobold.

“Is everyone out and safe now?” Helle asks

“Yeah, that should be the last of them.” The kobold replies as a couple of cooks flee back down the hallway. 

The kobold, who’s back was turned to Helle, turns to face Helle, as he does Helle grabs him by the throat and sets the creature’s head on fire before he could utter a call for help. The dog begins to bark and Helle shuts it up with a _searing light _ spell.

“Tell your god, he’s lost his place at the table.” Helle speaks to the incinerating kobold.

Helle drops the body once the head has been reduced to ashes, as he returns to the down minotaurs, the kobold’s body continues to slowly burn away to nothingness.

“Mark this one for return, we’ll need to question it, the other two can burn.” Helle commands pointing out the most pierced one for saving.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Xanthos picked out a waist endowed opulent looking human male...




Is that the Politically Correct way to say that he's fitness challenged?   



> The kobold, who’s back was turned to Helle, turns to face Helle, as he does Helle grabs him by the throat and sets the creature’s head on fire before he could utter a call for help. The dog begins to bark and Helle shuts it up with a _searing light _ spell.
> 
> “Tell your god, he’s lost his place at the table.” Helle speaks to the incinerating kobold.




Damn... that's not nice.

It's also awesome. There's a lot going on at this party, and I may need a meta-recap of what all is afoot at some point. I'm looking forward to some more.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Hey man, I'm so stoned*

As Helle’s Pyromancers were dragging the minotaurs out of the kitchen hallway, Xanthos had a thought cross his mind and he approached the pile of dead half-bulls. Sifting through the mass, he located the left hands of all the minotaurs and picked out the one that displayed the symbol of Carnack most clearly on the back of the hand. Finding one his was pleased with he served the hand at the wrist and placed it in a bag around his waist. He then returned to the rest of the group near the walk-in freezer as the Pyromancers returned from the kitchen to begin burning the bodies. The largest minotaur was removed from the pile and placed in the secret tunnel prior to the burning.

“Well, looks like you know how to lock a door, too bad you can’t unlock one mister rogue.” Kessen intimates

“This only proves I’m so good at my tasks, that even one as great as I cannot reverse what I have done.” Menthos responds

“This reminds me of a time I left the wax from a candle on the shelf leading to a troll’s den; I can tell you there were quite a few pickles drained from that lager I assure you.” Haimish added

“Doopa likes pickles.” The ogre states

This gives Menthos an idea.

“Well, there are pickles behind this door, along with dozens of racks of ribs.” Menthos pauses for dramatic effect, “still hungry?” he finishes with a raised eyebrow

Doopa needs no further provocation as he bull rushes the door and blasts it off of its hinges. The doppelganger inside, who had been trying to work the lock from the inside, is knocked back prone from the force of Doopa’s charge. Using it’s ability to hide even while in plain sight, the doppelganger quickly recovers it’s footing and spying a swaying side of beef, it scales up the hanging slab opposite the side the adventurers are on.

“Brr, a little cold in here.” Turgar issues

“It’s a meet locker; it’s supposed to be cold. Don’t want maggots in your steak.” Kessen informs the shaman

Doopa selects the nearest side of meat and tears it off its hook and shoving as much of it as he can in his mouth with one fluid motion.

“Isn’t that a tad raw?” Haimish asks

Doopa shrugs as his mouth rips into another bite.

“Doopa’s tribe has yet to master fire, so this seems normal to him.” Turgar says

Kessen enters the room, bow drawn and arrow notched, “Where’s this assassin of yours?” 

“Hiding obviously.” Menthos replies 

“Everyone fan out, and keep sharp. Shoot anything that moves.” Kessen instructs

“Does that include you?” Menthos asks

Kessen ignores the teifling as he sprints to the last side of beef hanging opposite the door and peeks around the meat to get a look at the wall opposite the door, “Clear along this wall!” 

Doopa continues to eat while Turgar and Haimish follow the nearside wall heading towards the back of the room, Haimish looking forward and Turgar looking into the hanging maze of beef.

Deftly the doppelganger descends from its hiding spot and quietly creeps to the open door, only to pull up as Xanthos’ frame appears in the doorway, blocking an easy escape.

“Who… ?” Xanthos gets out before the doppelganger flicks two daggers at the shifter. Both missing their target and bouncing off the wall behind Xanthos’ head.

Menthos turns back to catch the glimpse of the attack and shouts “Assassin!” to the rest of the party.

The doppelganger flings two more daggers at Xanthos, this time hitting the shifter in both shoulders. Xanthos stands his ground however, forcing the doppelganger to retreat back into the maze of hanging meat. 

“It went back into that row of …. Oh my god! The horror! What is this room?” Xanthos exclaims, realizing for the first time what the room contains

Kessen cuts through the rows of beef and quickly gets disorientated as the party’s shouts appear to come from all directions, “Where is it now?”

Haimish dives to the floor to look for it’s feet, mistaking Kessen’s feet as the doppelganger Haimish calls out, “It’s right in the center of the room, it appears to be confused as it’s moving in a tight circle not going anywhere. Turgar and Menthos push their way into the hanging slabs headed for the center of the room.

“I should be right on top of it, where is it now?” Kessen yells

Recognizing that the adventurers are headed in the wrong direction, the doppelganger shoots from its hiding spot, aiming to overrun Xanthos. Doopa spies the fleeing doppelganger and using the only thing he had in his hand, crushes the doppelganger beneath four hundred pounds of meat.

“Doopa squashed bug.” The ogre announces

“Great Doopa, now go find the assassin.” Kessen answers

Confused, Doopa shrugs his shoulders and gnaws into another side of beef. 

“Doopa killed the assassin.” Xanthos calls out 

The party makes their way back through the meat to inspect the body. 

“*whistles* that’s a lot of daggers” Haimish notes as Kessen pulls two dozen off the gray thing’s body. 

Xanthos scours the body for any tattoos or brands of affiliation, however he finds nothing of that sort. 

“I wonder who the target was.” Xanthos asks aloud

“I don’t know, but we’re losing time down here. Kalen’s bound to be here by now.” Haimish advises

The party agrees and leaves the doppelganger behind as they meet Helle at the stairs leading up to the party. The faint scent of burnt charcoal permeates the room.

“Ready?” Menthos asks, Helle nods and the two parties head upstairs 

Most of the hallway is clear, as boisterous noises can be heard coming from the room at the far end of the hallway. A throng of people have gathered all trying to get a glimpse of whatever is in the room.

“Appears are options have limited themselves.” Xanthos states

The groups head down the hallway and pause just behind the line of party goers trying to push their way into the room.

“He’s got to be in there.” Haimish hopes

“It’s packed pretty tight, how are we going to get in there, let alone be able to operate in there?” Kessen wondered

“We have our on path maker, Doopa please clear us a path.” Menthos asks

Doopa tries to barge his way through the crowd but it is still too tight for him to budge through, he gives up on trying to muscle his way in and starts chucking patrons back down the hallway. Once he’s thrown a dozen or so and the surrounding masses of people see him going to work, they voluntarily move out of his way.

“Excellent!” Haimish exclaims

The two parties squeeze into the room and try to get into position to see most of the room.

Haimish grabs Menthos’ arm, “I’m going to go find Kalen, here, you hold the vial here by the door in case he tries to flee.” Haimish shouts as he presses the vial into Menthos’ hands.

Haimish melds into the group of party goers, however the hand-off did not go unnoticed by Helle, the priest begins shoving his way back through the crowd towards Menthos.

Xanthos cranes his next and spots Lord De’ Lite leaning against the far wall opposite the only exit to the room. Xanthos gets Kessen, Turgar, and Menthos’ attention and hand signals where he sees the vampire.

Haimish passes the midpoint of the room and hears a shouting voice rise above the shouting throng of guests.

“You won’t believe her beauty, I challenge any man to look her in the eyes and tell me she is not the loveliest thing ever created!” A crescendo of shouts drowns out any other words the man may have said.

Haimish stops and tries to see what all the commotion is about and spies a gnome standing next to a hooded robed figure.

“You want to see her?” The gnome shouts as the people scream, “Well then feast your eyes!”

Haimish began to form the sound of an “M” as the robed figure raised her slender arms and pulled back the hood revealing a writhing mass of black snakes on her head and glowing green eyes. That was the last thing Haimish saw.


----------



## Jon Potter

*Yeah... I definitely need a recap.*

Wow, your game has a lot of stuff going on simultaneously.

Plots within plots.

And I've definitely lost track of all the players. Do we yet know who the doppleganger might work for? Who the kobold was? Who brought a medusa to the party?

My head, it is spinning.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Wow, your game has a lot of stuff going on simultaneously.
> 
> Plots within plots.
> 
> And I've definitely lost track of all the players. Do we yet know who the doppleganger might work for? Who the kobold was? Who brought a medusa to the party?
> 
> My head, it is spinning.




Doppleganger - The PCs get an idea although they're unable to follow up on it.

The Koblod - This was a new player who lasted 1/2 a session, I've killed him this way to set up what happens in the morning after the party. Motovations become clearer then, and you'll probably have to reference the party posts to sift through it.

The medusa - well, this is still a topic for discussion and one of the PCs makes it their mission in life to find out who/what/when/where/how/ and why on the medusa, and it just gets more interesting in the next post (re: the medusa)


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Doppleganger - The PCs get an idea although they're unable to follow up on it.




Cool.



> The Koblod - This was a new player who lasted 1/2 a session.




Okay, wait a sec. The _player_ lasted only have a session or the _character_ lasted only half a session. If the former, then I'm impressed; I've never been able to scare off a player _that_ quickly. 



> The medusa - well, this is still a topic for discussion and one of the PCs makes it their mission in life to find out who/what/when/where/how/ and why on the medusa, and it just gets more interesting in the next post (re: the medusa)




Fantastic on all accounts. As a player and gm, I love it when an encounter sparks an in-character vendetta! As a reader I love it when things get more interesting.

Not that this story hour was suffering from a lack of interesting situations prior to now, but you know what I mean.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Feeling unraveled?*

Unable to see the medusa, Xanthos watched as the party guests around him, in an instant, turned to stone. A weighty silence descended upon the room, then the screams came as those in the back realized what had transpired and began to trample their way out the door.

Menthos felt a hand grab his arm and yank him down near the floor.

“Give me the vial, and we’ll light this place up like a pyre.” Helle advised

“Not yet, Xanthos spied Kalen on the other side of the room, we need to see if he fell victim to this stoning as well.” Menthos replied

Xanthos ducked below the shoulder level of the now statues in front of him, he then slowly made his way to the spot where he had seen Kalen moments before.

“Arrggg!” Doopa yelled as he flung a statue, that had tipped over on him, across the room. It collided with four others and they all fell broken in a heap

“Don’t do that you’re killing them permanently!” Kessen shouted at the ogre

Doopa looked confused before he slapped a human female statue across the face, when she made no objections, “Lady already dead.”

“They might be able to be brought back to flesh moron.” Turgar joined in

“Who cares about them! After a few fireballs, there won’t be anything left to turn back to flesh anyway,” Helle answers

“I don’t think that’s a solution I can live with.” Kessen says pointing his arrow at the Kadorian priest

“I don’t need your permission, and no you won’t live through it.” Helle answers

Xanthos, keeping his head lowered at the floor, looks towards the center of the room for anything moving, he hears the shouts of the party behind him as he passes Haimish. Xanthos pauses for a second to assure himself that the bard is now stone, then continues onward.

“Please sirs I just want to get out!” A guest pleads with the pyromancers to get out of her way, the pyromancers refuse to listen to her pleas 

“Just let her pass, she’s obviously no threat.” Kessen demands, his eye trained on Helle

“Did you know that a vampire can take the form of anyone he wishes, even that of a helpless noble woman, or a psychotic archer?” Helle replies 

Kessen could not argue that logic and resigned to let the woman plead for mercy until such time the identity of Kalen could be proved.

Xanthos reaches the far wall and begins to creep along it, face down, studying the shoes of those around him looking for anything not gray and unmoving. He stops just short of a pair of black boots leading a black cape. Keeping his eyes locked, Xanthos raises his head up the figure in front of him until he catches a glimpse of obviously male hands and then raises his sight level to the face of Lord De’ Lite (Kalen).

“I can’t find my way out of here.” Xanthos says hurriedly

“I don’t think you’re lost.” Kalen replies

Xanthos feels a heavy thrust of energy across his senses, but he manages to fight off the domination. Xanthos however tries his hand at bluffing the vampire, “What is your will?”

“Kill him.” Kalen states

A confused Xanthos stands motionless for a second before beginning to look around for whomever Kalen thought needed killing, only to feel the cold steel of a knife penetrate his opulent clothes and enter his back just above the pelvis. It was then that Xanthos realized his wasn’t giving an order to the shifter, but to someone else in order to kill Xanthos.

Xanthos wheeled around to face his attacker, a small gnome holding a knife stained with the shifter’s blood faced off with Xanthos.

Kalen left the assassin to his work and then bounded through the mass of newly created stone artwork, headed for the exit.

“He’s coming for you!” Xanthos yells as the gnome stabs the shifter in the thigh, Xanthos recognizes the warm numbing sensation as poison

Menthos throws Helle off his arm as Kessen turns his bow towards the center of the room as the sounds of falling statues crescendos before him. Turgar backtracks a little in order to get his body between the room and the exit.

Stone flies everywhere as an eruption of statues make way for the enraged vampire. The two statues blocking Menthos’ view of the rest of the room get shoved away as the undead monster tosses them aside and growls at the vial held in the teifling’s hands. 

Helle begins casting his fireball spell as the rest of the pyromancers cower in fear, Menthos tries to back up to give himself some space but is already pressed tightly to the wall. Kalen rears his clawed hand back and bares his pointed teeth, his arm moves near the speed of thought, but it was not fast enough to evade the muscled arms of Doopa. The barbarian wraps the vampire in a full nelson and holds him tight.

Menthos sees his opening and leaps up at the vampire’s face, he then slams the vial into the vampire’s mouth then slams his fists upward shutting Kalen’s mouth around the broken glass and spilling fluid.

Kalen’s scream lasted only a second before light erupted from the vampire’s eyes, nose, mouth, and throat. Beaming its positive energy like a sun’s rays behind a cloud. Then the explosion of light obliterated the vampire’s body and sent shards of stone like flying daggers all about the room, nicking statues and imbedding themselves into exposed flesh. 

The piercing stone daggers along with the poison circulating in his body, drops Xanthos to his knees unable to defend himself. Then the _fireball_ went off.

Initially aimed at the room’s center, Helle’s eyesight is momentarily blinded by the power of the liquid sun’s effects on the vampire and his aim veers off to the right as the fireball careens into the east wall. It blows those remaining statues over and shatters them as the flames envelope the left half of the room, wrapping themselves like a cape around Xanthos and the gnome. The shifter falls forward and only suffers minor burns to his back. Xanthos thought he saw the gnome encased in the conflagration, but after the fire waves passes, there is no sign of the assassin.

Menthos, blinded by the light calls out, “Is he dead?”

“Doopa not know, Doopa can’t see.” The ogre replies

“Yeah he’s gone, along with half the room.” Kessen reports looking at Helle, “That was definitely not called for.”

Helle doesn’t respond as he collects his blinded pyromancers from their huddled hiding spot, “Up with you, time to do damage control.”

“What should we do now?” Menthos looks to Helle

“Get out of here before the constables arrive to arrest all of you.” Helle advises

“Why? We didn’t nothing wrong. You’re the one who made it impossible to bring most of these people back from stone.” Kessen states

“Anybody see a little gnome run through here?” Xanthos asks

“No, and I’m not surprised either, between the sun, the explosion, and the giant ball of flame, it’s a wonder I’m even talking to you.” Kessen answers

“That’s because your ass was unaffected by any of those things.” Menthos replies

“Enough we need to return to town Menthos.” Helle instructs

“Hey, not without Haimish, he’s been turned to stone. That reminds me, what happened with the stoning?” Xanthos inquires

“Don’t know, probably some spell Kalen threw.” Turgar surmises

Xanthos and Kessen help heft Haimish onto the ogre’s back and then secure the statue with rope. While searching through the victims, of both the stoning and the fireball, Menthos discovers the statue of Lord Palmere.

“I think we should take him too.” Menthos argues

“I agree, maybe we can get some answers out of him as to what happened here tonight.” Xanthos agrees

Menthos and Xanthos then load Lord Palmere onto the back of Turgar and then the parties head out of the complex through the secret exit.

“Did you guys handle the goblins well enough?” Turgar asks

“Didn’t find any, the entrance was collapsed and we found evidence that they had been there recently, but the trip here was uneventful.” Menthos answers

“Another mystery to solve.” Xanthos says aloud

“Who cares about that, after word gets out about what happened here tonight, they won’t come looking for us anymore.” Kessen states

“They won’t, other interested parties most assuredly will.” Helle replies

“And what parties would those be?” Turgar asked

Helle pauses and when he doesn’t immediately answer, Xanthos speaks up, “Assassins, Kalen controlled one in the room, he attacked me after I tried to bluff Kalen into thinking he had dominated me.”

“Do you think he was working with the doppelganger in the meat locker?” Kessen asks

“Don’t know, maybe we should go back and drag the doppelganger’s body back with us?” Xanthos asks

“Too late, and it would just slow us down. After their precious little item got used, I’m sure the School of Ancient Knowledge will be arriving in due time to wipe the place clean.” Helle advises

“It’s not our fault you weren’t invited and shouldn’t have been here, looks to me like we handled the vampire just fine without your help.” Kessen boasts

“Yes, I saw that too. However I believe you’ll be singing a slightly different tune after you’ve had time to re-acclimate yourself to Highcastle.” Helle answers


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*The investigation commences*

The party reaches Highcastle and head towards the Church or Kador.

“Can we leave Haimish the Stoned within the temple? I don’t want someone putting him in the Park of Obscene Statues.” Menthos inquires

“You can leave him, but the merchant you’ll have to find other quarters for.” Helle responds

“What? Why? Where are we going to find a place to stick this thing at?” Xanthos argues

“Leave it at his house; I’m sure they won’t have any problems with it.” Helle replies

“They can’t help him either; I thought you said you could rectify this condition?” Xanthos asks

“We can, just not today and I’m not doing it for free. Charity is for the Morwynites go plead to them.” Helle answers

Xanthos and Turgar, who are carrying Lord Palmere slow to a stop and set the statue down in the middle of the street. Dawn was quickly approaching and they knew they would need a secure place before they lost the cover of night to the bustling city. Kessen left the group heading for the temple and rejoined Xanthos and Turgar. 

“Why do we hide him in the inn room? Say it’s a piece of art if anyone asks?” Kessen suggests

“Because it’ll get stolen then.” Turgar counters

“No, why don’t we go ahead and hide it there. You guys can watch him while I go find out who we should deliver him to.” Xanthos offers

“Sure, and try to get them to agree to a hefty reward as well. No need for us to be breaking our backs for nothing.” Kessen states

Turgar and Xanthos hustle the statue back to the Scholar’s Inn and heft the block of stone up the stairs and into their room, where Turgar collapses on the bed. Xanthos bids them farewell and he heads back out into the city as the eastern sky changes from a royal blue to a reddish-orange. The shifter checks his pouches for the minotaur’s severed hand and heads towards the western gatehouses.

Doopa sets Haimish down in the open aired atrium of the Temple of Kador, as Helle heads further in to make his report to his superior. 

Doopa, looks up at the brightening sky and then back down at Haimish, “Can we move him, birds will poop all over him.”

“So? If you’re worried about his hygiene, you can give him a bath before he gets fixed.” Menthos states as he answers the call of nature over Haimish’s legs

“Hey, what are you doing? You making it worse!” Doopa shouts

“You’re going to give him a bath right? Well I’m doing my part by supplying the ammonia.” Menthos answers

“What that?” Doopa asks

“Cleaning fluid, good for tile floors and other ceramics. Some cultures even believe it’s medicinal.” Menthos replies

“Savages.” Doopa answers which gets a laugh from Menthos

“The high priest will see you now.” An acolyte says to Menthos

“For what? I didn’t ask to see him.” Menthos asks

“He wishes to remove that burning sensation you complained about a week ago.” The acolyte responds

“Oh really? Does he have the hot teifling babe with him too? Because I distinctly remember requesting help in that area as well.” Menthos replies

“No, he promises not to flay your skin while dangling you over the Pit of Eternal Flame by your eyes.” The acolyte responds

Menthos chuckles, but then abruptly stops after realizing the acolyte wasn’t laughing, “That’s a joke right? I mean I did the man a favor.” No response comes from the acolyte

“Doopa, sic him.” Menthos orders

The ogre stands confused, “Sick him? He is in a temple isn’t that what they take care of?” Doopa replies

“This way.” The acolyte motions

Menthos gulps hard and follows the acolyte into the inner sanctum of the temple, there he finds Helle and Statinisor talking, seeing Menthos enter they cease their conversation and turn to face the teifling.

“Welcome afflicted one, Helle has explained to me the events of this early morning, however there is a question that he cannot answer for me.”

Menthos looks to Helle and then back at the high priest. His mind raced with what the question could possibly be, Menthos tried to remember something he didn’t tell Helle about, but couldn’t think of anything.

“How much is your friend’s existence as a fleshy being worth to you?” Statinisor asked

“Well, I don’t. He’s not a fr. It’s always nice to have allies and collectable debts.” Menthos replied after changing his reply twice

“Yes, it is a fine thing indeed. Helle is going to the Courts of Maal to start the pendulum in motion for us. I would like to discuss an arrangement with you over the health of your stone friend out there.”

Menthos nodded as Helle left the two to continue their discussion, as Helle closed the doors behind him, Menthos noticed he felt warm almost hot for the first time inside the Temple of Kador. The feeling unnerved him as the high priest motioned Menthos to follow him through another door.

 Xanthos, shifted into the form of an owl and soared out and over the city, on a heading for the Palmere estate, as he flew over the western wall he spied the bodies of dozens of small black creatures littering the battlements and the ground just outside the city wall. His interest piqued, Xanthos changes course and lands next to a makeshift shelter, where wounded soldiers are being treated. He shifts back to the form of an elven noble and walks out into the clean up effort that’s being carried out around him.

“Excuse me sir, I was wondering where I might find a sergeant or someone along those lines who would be in charge?” Xanthos asked the first constable he saw.

The man pointed out an armored individual atop the wall as the man Xanthos sought. Xanthos thanked the man and then ambled up one of the many ladders propped against the wall ferrying bodies up and down them like ants. Several times he was questioned or stopped and asked about his intentions or to state that this was a sealed area and he needed to return to the city. Xanthos always replied that he needed to speak to the Sergeant-at-Arms and continued on his way up to the battlements ignoring the calls for him to return to the city.

Xanthos approached the Sergeant and waited as he finished a conversation with a subordinate, “Get down to the school, tell them we got demons to be rid of and if they get you any crap you come back here and tell me and I’ll have the place leveled!” 

_Demons?_ Thought Xanthos, _is that what the small black creatures were?_

“This isn’t the place for you citizen. Who let you up here?” The man demanded

Xanthos half-heartedly waved his hand at the multitudes of constables below them, “Doesn’t matter, I have evidence of a murder plot subjugated by the Temple of Carnack.” 

“Not surprising, they are the followers of the slaughter god. Why are you telling me this?” the sergeant asked

“The ruins last night, there was a party, a medusa turned half the place to stone and three minotaurs showed up with this branding.” Xanthos produced the hand of the minotaur, “they began killing everything that moved.”

“Yep, brand of Carnack all right. So, you were at this party?”

“Yes”

“With a medusa, priests of Carnack, and now they’re all stoned?” 

“Well, some of them got away, I got away. Here, do what you want with the hand, I’m just reporting what went on is all.” Xanthos got a prickly feeling on the back of his neck, and left the hand with the sergeant. He then retreated back down the ladders and slipped behind a row of buildings. He transformed back into an owl and took off for Lord Palmere’s estate again.

The sun had just crested the horizon when Xanthos circled over the large manor of the merchant Lord Palmere. Xanthos’ eyes went wide as they took in the sight of a blasted out southern wall. Debris was strewn for hundreds of feet to the northeast. Xanthos traced a line with his eyes along the same path the debris took, it led straight to the western wall of Highcastle. Swooping in low, Xanthos spotted hundreds of small footprints leading from the manor and heading towards the city. Xanthos concluded the tracks must have been made by the demons the night before. 

He soared again and turned this time to the ruins where the party took place. Sure enough it was crawling with constables and a few obvious mages as well. Xanthos landed behind some scrub brush and transformed back into the elven noble, he approached the entrance to the ruins and spied a dozen or so ogres lifting the stone statues out from the depths below.

“Did you find the Priests of Carnack? They were piled in the kitchen.” Xanthos inquires

A mage steps forward to record Xanthos’ statement, he hands the written script to an armored man in Overlord colors and insignia.

“We found no bodies of priests, we did find these statues, evidence of fire magic, a man that had been poisoned to death, and a doppelganger locked in a walk-in freezer, but no priests.” The man stated

Xanthos felt heavy magics fall about him as the scenery took on a bloated visage. He didn’t know what the magics were only that he felt compelled to speak the truth and remain rooted in his spot for as long as he did so. Xanthos divulged his knowledge of the Priests of Carnack and of him turning over a branded hand to a sergeant along the western wall of Highcastle. He told of the appearance of the medusa and of fighting the doppelganger after being alerted to it’s presence by Menthos.

Satisfied with the answers, Xanthos felt some of the weight lift and took the opportunity to return to owl form and speed back to Highcastle.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Xanthos felt heavy magics fall about him as the scenery took on a bloated visage. He didn’t know what the magics were only that he felt compelled to speak the truth and remain rooted in his spot for as long as he did so.




Gotta love the Zone of Truth!

But I guess that Law and Order, D&D-style, wouldn't be all that exciting a show to watch.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Your last cup of sorrow*

While Xanthos was being interviewed by the city guard at the party site, events were unfolding back in town.

At dawn the marbled steps of the Court of Maal are emblazoned with the golden rays of the day's first light. Golden flecks within the marble create a scintillating effect across the plaza in front of the court. Most days people gather to watch the light show. Today however a crowd of worshippers not of Maal stood at the foot of the court and impeded the light show, much to the dismay of those gathered.

The Church of Kador had sent a contingent to the courts, and once the light fell upon the glittering steps the cloistered of Kador ascended the twelve steps to the court, one step for each doctrine Maal gave to the very first leaders of the church. Only one of the doctrines is currently known*, and the Maalites believe the second doctrine will only become known after all the mortal races adhere to the first one. 

The Kadorians reached the gilded great doors of the court just as the justicars were opening them to the day's hearings. Most of the justicar's duties were to preside over ownership rights and mete out justice of petty crimes, so strict was the overlord's laws, that it was a rare day that the justicars were able to hear arguments over greater evils. Today would be such a day.

The justicar called to order the day's proceedings and the Kadorians stepped forward to plead for sanctions against the Church of Tinel for the creation of magics that infringed upon the sacred realm of their deity Kador. The Kadorians produced witnesses that testified to the veracity of the claim, describing the disintegration of a nobleman named Kalen De' Lite through the use of a vial of liquid fire. 

As is custom, most of the temples and churches in Highcastle send representatives to the court everyday as a means to garner more followers, a man about to be levied a fine against or maybe a public flogging is more inclined to accept the protection of the church if they can deliver him from whatever fate is deemed to be given in exchange for lifelong service within a temple. And as it so happened today was like any other day, and upon hearing the Kadorian's argument the representative from the Church of Tinel immediately called for a hearing on the matter.

The Kadorian's pressed that no hearing was needed the facts spoke for themselves and it was within the right of the justicar to mete out justice in the name of Kador against the Tinel interlopers. The Tinelites countered that the object in question be brought forth for study and proof of the Kadorian's claims. The Kadorians discounted the offer stating it was a stalling tactic made to delay the inevitable for the Tinelites. 

The justicar asked if the receptacle of the liquid was retained to which the Kadorian's answered "no", but that the loss of the glass ball should in no way diminish the punishment required by law for the obvious misuse of the fire domain by another church. The Tinelites had used the brief stalling of judgment to call forth their churches' Armarius** who had arrived in a flurry of discord amid a din of obscenities directed at the Kador camp. 

The Armarius addressed the justicar of the Court of Maal by stating that the item in question was not based of fire as the Kadors erroneously claim, but in fact was based upon sunlight, and since the sun is the domain of Urian and his church has not stepped forward to claim any injustice, the Kadorian case should be dismissed and a chastisement by leveled against the Church of Kador for wasting the Court's time on a matter not contested with the church whose domain is really in question.

The Kadorian's pointed out that the Temple of Urian could not and would not appear before the court on this matter***. The Armarius of Tinel pointed out that it was not the fault of the Tinelites if another deity failed to declare their objections. This infuriated the Kadorians as they pointed out the loophole the Armarius was using to have the proceedings ended. With the hearing appearing to be close to ending with a judgment for the Temple of Tinel, the Kadorians played the last card they held and declared a cult for being a branch of the School of Ancient Knowledge and not an actual faith.

This brought the ire of the Armarius to a boiling point as he publicly denounced the Kador faith as an avenue for demonic possession. At that statement, weapons were drawn and spells were readied. The justicar ordered the two faiths to stand down and evacuate the court, the justicar ordered that Lord Palmere be brought forth for questioning with regard to events of the previous night. The Kadorian's responded by announcing that the Tinelites had secreted Lord Palmere away and he would not be produced to answer the justicar's call. 

Incensed at another Kadorian lie, the Armarius called for the arrest of the Kadorian contingent. This announcement spurred the representatives of the Church of Canarak to offer their services to the justicar and slaughter both groups as punishment for contempt of court. The justicar ordered the Kadorians jailed on attempting to incite a riot. The Armarius was ordered to return to the Temple of Tinel while the original present Tinelites were ordered held on suspicion of harboring a fugitive of the court (Lord Palmere). The Canaraks were remanded to the jail for attempted murder of a high priest. 

A sending was sent to Helle at the Kador church relaying this morning's failure. Helle dispatched a pyromancer to the Eyrie of Urian, where the pyromancer was to beseech an Eagle Rider to argue on behalf of the church of Kador against the practices of the Tinelites. However as was has been remained so, and the Eagle Riders refused to speak on Alimus'**** behalf. 

Dejected the pyromancer returned to his church where he received his final command, he left the church shortly before noon and at a quarter past noon he had completed his final task as half the jail burned in divine flames as the visiting pyromancer immolated himself and the disgraced Kadorians.

Statinistor walked Menthos along a vast hallway lined with basalt busts of past high priests and risen pyromancers. Helle called him away for a moment and Menthos was left to admire the lifelike feel of the cleavage on the female pyromancers. He was rather enjoying himself when Statinistor returned a half hour later. The high priest's demeanor had changed from a caring father figure to a one with a hint of vexatious imprint on his smile.

"Menthos, it appears that we have failed in our attempt to rid you of the heavy load you and your compatriots have been saddled with." Statinistor spoke

"What are you talking about? You couldn't fix Haimish? No biggie, I think he makes a better urinal anyway." Menthos replied

"No, this weight is unseen and comes from an old source." Statinistor responded

"Oohhh, so it's not Haimish? Is it the Lord Hairy Palm guy?" Menthos asked

"I fear all the trouble you went through last night is doomed to be repeated, but that is for another day. There is nothing any of us can do for that problem right now. I do however have a proposition for you." Statinistor states

"You're really not my type." Menthos objects

"Beneath this church lies a vast network of causeways, hallways, tunnels, and sewers. It is possible to reach most if not all of the other churches within Highcastle by using this network. We learned of an impending attack by a rival church that was going to use these hidden tunnels. We sent forth two passels of initiates to find the passage the attack was going to come from and report back so that we could properly greet these guest with a contingent of pyromancers and lots of fireworks in celebration of their sacrifice to their wretched faith. However we have not heard from them in two days and we fear the worst. I would be willing to restore your friend there for free and pay you handsomely for your valued service in the employ of this humble church."

"Will the payment include the addition of a small physicality nature?" Menthos inquired

"I will send Fyrhe to your quarters this evening for you, she's spoken of your since your return from the ruins, I quite think she's taken a liking towards you." Statinistor responds

"Well, can't say I really blame her. I mean look at what you get for the whole package. Best deal this side of Carnage if I say so myself." Menthos praises himself

"Yes, so you have a habit of informing me." Statinistor says

Turgar happened to wonder by the Court of Maal and noticed the public posting for the presence of Lord Palmere by two PM today to answer for the crime of treason. The ogre quickly returned to the Church of Kador and reported the notice to the party and a returning Xanthos.

"I think we should take Lord Palmere in, maybe they can undo the stone effect and we can get some answers out of him." Xanthos argues

"Why? We're not going to get the chance to talk with him, they're going to dress him down and send him packing to the guillotine." Kessen states

"I think our first order of business needs to be fixing Haimish, I think it only fair since he was the one who was supposed to kill the vampire." Turgar argues

"I already took care of that, he'll cease to be a urinal for avians in short order." Menthos announces

"And how much of my money did you promise to pay, and that I'll have to take out of your ass to do this?" Kessen threatens

"None, I got a coupon for one free de-stoning, so since I reckoned I would be unable to ever use it, should I be stoned, I thought it better to cash it in and get some use out of it as it really didn't have any cash value and was due to expire next month anyway." Menthos replies

"Hooray for Menthos!" Doopa cheered 

"What are the strings?" Kesson asked

"Whatever do you mean?" Menthos replied coyly

"What did you promise to get Haimish brought back to life?" Kesson demanded

"I have to do this search and rescue mission for Statinistor along with Haimish, that's all. You guys don't even need to come." Menthos replied

"Well, I'm glad. I just learned the were demons pouring out of Lord Palmere's estate, there was no sign of the gnome assassin, and there were people from the Church of Canarak at the party slaughtering people left and right." Xanthos explains

"Well, that is what they do. What did you expect, they would be handing out flowers and fliers for a fish fry?" Menthos countered

"Nevertheless, I want to find out what was so important at the party, that dozens of people had to die and why their were so many assassins there." Xanthos commented

"I'd like to know what a medusa was doing there." Haimish's voice spoke up as he entered the great hall

"A medusa? That explains things, yes." Xanthos remarked 

"Well, that seals it for me, I don't want to know anymore." Turgar announces

"This adds a level of covertness that I hadn't accounted for. Intriguing, I shall have to add this to my growing list of suspects." Xanthos speaks

"How Haimish feel?" Doopa asks

"I'm a little stiff. Hey!" Haimish replies jokingly

"Doopa, give you rub down. Doopa know what it like to sleep on rocks." The ogre replies, missing the joke completely

"It's a good thing you have a spell to induce laughter, because that stiff joke belongs in the bedroom. Which reminds me, I'll see you guys later I've got a date with a fiery little tramp." Menthos broadcasts and exits up the stairs to the clergy's quarters.

_* That being that vengeance is wrong_ 
_** Armarius - High Priest of the Temple of Tinel, akin to a Mystic Theurge Prc_ 
_*** Urian while he does possess the sun domain, has granted a demi-god the position of sun caretaker_ 
_**** Alimus is only a demi-god and thusly not very powerful, and certainly would not want to get between two enraged greater dieties_


----------



## Jon Potter

HM, glad to see you posting. I'd begun to fear that real life had claimed another of my favorite Story Hour authors.

I really enjoyed this post, you've got a great handle on the interactions of the various faiths. It's a lot of fun to read.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> HM, glad to see you posting. I'd begun to fear that real life had claimed another of my favorite Story Hour authors.
> 
> I really enjoyed this post, you've got a great handle on the interactions of the various faiths. It's a lot of fun to read.




No, I got promoted at work and most of my free time has been spent in meetings or organizing the next one. Now that the "honeymoon" phase is over it's starting to get more routine and the posts will start picking back up.   

The interactions of these churches and with the School form the foundation of what the party is currently knee deep in. In fact I hinted to two of the players that their current PC mysteries might be furthered along by paying close attention to this and the next few updates.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*What did we learn today, if anything?*

Haimish excuses himself from the room after letting Menthos know he needs to drop by the School of Ancient knowledge to pick up his prize for killing Kalen. Xanthos decides to go to the Courts of Maal to see who has brought the charges against Lord Palmere and tried to solve the mystery of who the players were at last night’s party or at least who is moving the pieces and in what game. Xanthos rationalizes that if he can at least find out what game they’re playing and what pieces they’re using he can better defend himself against their machinations. Turgar accompanies Xanthos while the rest of the party shops for replacement goods and a few upgrades to their inventory.

Haimish traverses the gorge-like back alley of the School, the ever present gargoyles stare down in oppressive statuesque poses. The rolling of thunder could be heard off to the north as a summer storm took aim at the city, it’s winds kicked up debris and leaves alike and whirled them around the cul-de-sac creating little debris tornados for Haimish’s enjoyment. Finally reaching the open portal, Haimish retrieved the small coin from his belt pouch and walked through the dark opening. 

Haimish’s vision stuttered and spun as his foot stepped not on stone or tile but on carpet as the rest of his body was pulled through the teleportation portal and joined his leg in the opulent bedroom. Heat came from a lightless fireplace to his right as he took in the sights, the floor was covered in expensive furs and pelts, some from creatures Haimish thought were made up in bardic tales that were so old they had no written version. The bed seemed to be carved out of a single enormous tree trunk; the silk on the bed looked ethereal in its near transparency. 

Haimish then noticed the windows, the building had no external windows and yet here they were overlooking a green pasture with the sun rising in the eastern sky. Haimish thought it was either a masterful forgery or this room was nowhere near Highcastle. 

“You’re right of course; you’re not looking out at Highcastle.” A newly familiar voice spoke in Haimish’s thoughts, the bard turned to see the forms of the wizard with what Haimish was beginning to call a void robe, the elderly wizard and the two assistants fade into view.

“My role as your guinea pig is over; Kalen blew up in a fireball of light last night.” Haimish announces

“Yes, we know. We watched the grand spectacle from afar, although your role in the event will likely be greatly overstated.” The wizard remarked

“I’m a bard it’s what I do, either way it makes for a great story about a group of nobodies who defeat a great evil. It’ll sell millions.” Haimish boasts

“I’m afraid that would still be a great work of fiction. I see that you have returned to the land of the breathing, have you become the guinea pig to another? Pity you seem to have typecast yourself in that role.” The void robed wizard answers

“Merely a favor for releasing me from an eternity of collecting bird droppings on my head for free nothing more, I don’t like the hot heads much, but I do respect them.” Haimish replies

“Eh, like all faiths they want to rule the world.” The wizard answers

“True, but at least those guys are upfront about it; some people have to show off out of sight and from afar. Heaven forbid they get their own hands dirty.” Haimish jibbed at the wizards

“How naïve a view you possess, my hands are covered with a stain that even The Styx could not clean.” The wizard brags

“Yeah, yeah, yeah more words and less action. You’re about as redundant as an azer with a fire resistance ring; your grand self righteousness bores me. When I need to be impressed I’ll go talk to a birthing mother not you guys.” Haimish postured 

“Well, either your brief moment of stoniness has reinforced your backbone, or the Kadors casted the spell _grow a set _ when they returned you to flesh.” The wizard replies

“I understand you guys weren’t rushing to my aid after I demo’d your product for the Kadors, which leads me to the question of why you didn’t tell me about Kalen’s little medusa friend before the party? Information like that would’ve come in handy.” Haimish inquires

“An unexpected complication and not the only one that was hurdled last night.” The wizard answers

“What’s that supposed to mean? It sounds as if you knew of some things and decided to not be forthcoming with the knowledge.” Haimish’s ire begins to rise

“Surely you know the adage knowledge is power, the less you know of the more I know, the less you affect me. For your information I did help a little, who do you think got rid of the goblins squatting in the back tunnel for your little fiendish friend? I assure you it took more than two spells to do that.” The wizard dismisses Haimish’s attitude

“Either way, I’m here for my promised reward. I’ll be taking that off your hands now if you don’t mind.” Haimish demands

“Certainly, my assistant here will lead you to the items. I look forward to doing business with you in the near future.” The void robed wizard stamps his staff onto the floor and blinks out along with the elderly man and one of the assistants.

The remaining assistant walks around Haimish and opens a large set of double doors behind him.

“I just came from there, that’s the alley don’t even think of trying to stiff me, or I’ll be really….” Haimish pondered his next word as he wondered what could befall of him here, the assistant even seemed to pause to hear what Haimish’s next word would be, “put out and fail to include the school in the ballads of my adventures.”

The assistant turned back to the door and beckoned Haimish to follow, with a defeated “sigh” the bard feel into step behind the apprentice and followed the man through winding hallways and down two staircases.

“Wouldn’t it have been easier to teleport there?” Haimish asked, annoyed with the length of time it was taking to get to where Haimish wanted to be, in the back of his mind a small thought began to grow, that maybe this would turn out to be a four hour red herring chase to nowhere.

The apprentice said nothing to Haimish, even when directly asked a question. Haimish thought the man must be mute even after the bard went through his comedic routine trying to illicit a response and got nary a chuckle out of the apprentice. Haimish began to regale in the hallways they walked down hoping that he could annoy the apprentice enough to respond to him. However, that only served to get Haimish a dry throat and no audience. 

After three hours of walking and wearing his patience to a nub, Haimish’s guide pulls up in front of a sturdy wooden door. He fumbles with the wooden beam lock in front of it and pushes the door open. The room inside is dimly lit, but Haimish can make out an open coffin lying on a mound of freshly dug earth.

“Uh, joke’s over, this looks a little morbid to be picking some minor magic items through grave robbing.” Haimish nervously states

The apprentice grabs the bards arm and drags him inside the room. Haimish quickly yanks his arm free and brandishes his longsword in preparation for a fight, “You’ll not get me in there with you coming with me.” Haimish declares

The apprentice ignores him and makes his way to the coffin; he retrieves a glass jar from a nearby table and scopes up some dirt from beneath the coffin and seals the jar with the dirt within. The apprentice then approaches Haimish and extends the jar to him.

“What the? You walk me all this way for dirt? What kind of crap is this? How about I kill you and take your heart? That’s got to be more powerful.” Haimish yells

“Shh, take this treasure; it will be worth more to you than anything my master was willing to give.” The apprentice finally speaks

A skeptic Haimish stands astonished by the actions of the apprentice and studies the man looking for anything make may be construed as deception. After resigned to the fact the man is most likely telling the truth, Haimish reaches out and grabs the jar. In an instant he finds himself on the steps of the School, holding the jar in his right hand. Confused, Haimish places the dirt filled jar in his backpack and returns to the Temple of Kador.

“What magic did you get from the wizards?” Kessen inquires as Haimish strolls into the temple.

“I got more questions, I hate when that happens.” Was Haimish’s reply and the bard saunters off to ponder his visit to the School.

Xanthos finds the seediest bar in town and shifting to his wealthy noble look, puts out the info that he’s looking for some discrete silencing of a rival, in hopes it leads him to an assassin guild representative he can bribe for info about the party last night. He is approached by two low life scum of men who tell Xanthos they can set up a meeting with some people who can do this. Xanthos agrees, and is told to get a room upstairs for the night and their contact will meet him later tonight.

Xanthos also asks around about Lord Palmere, but gets nowhere in the poor section of town and decides to report what he’s been able to set up thus far with the rest of the party back at the temple. 

Turgar however proceeds to the Courts of Maal and hears the charges levied against Lord Palmere.

_Destruction of private property as some of the slaves turned to stone were owned by another merchant lord, Lord Burghondy

De-beautification of surrounding landscape, brought on be the horde of manes as they raced out of the collapsed home of Lord Palmere

Unauthorized summoning of nuisance creatures, again with the manes

Failure to properly complete a signed contract, apparently Lord Palmere’s current stoned form prevented him from paying Lord Burghondy for the rental of his slaves._*

As Turgar listens to the charges his mind begins to form his own prime suspect for the events of last night and he returned to the temple to report what he had found as well.



*The city is ruled by a very Lawful-Evil overlord.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> “Well, either your brief moment of stoniness has reinforced your backbone, or the Kadors casted the spell _grow a set _ when they returned you to flesh.” The wizard replies




That's great! You can consider that line stolen for my own game.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> That's great! You can consider that line stolen for my own game.




Oh there's a much MUCH better one coming up that Xanthos says to Doopa, it's grown to a cult-like standing in the group since Xanthos uttered the words.... heck I'm laughing right now as I type this. You're going to love it!


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*I think I'm being followed*

After hearing Turgar’s report from the Courts, Xanthos narrows his focus down to Lord Burghondy. The party gathers to decide what to do with the statue of Lord Palmere, give him to the courts as is, beg the Kadors to restore him and then escort him to the courts, take him as is to the Park of Obscene Statues and set him up in there somewhere. 

“I don’t think Lord Palmere had anything to do with this, I think it was a frame job all the way.” Kessen intones

“Why was Lord Palmere throwing the party anyway?” Xanthos asks aloud

“He had secured a trade agreement with a Virdistan merchant, which is a first under the current Overlord and was throwing the party to gloat.” Helle advises

Xanthos scowls in mock pain, “Were there more than one suitor for the merchant? I wonder if Lord Burghondy got slighted and took out his frustrations on Palmere? What happened to the visiting merchant? Did he get stoned as well?”

“Too late to find out know, with the constables and the School all over the crime scene, if he was there they’ve got him now. I wouldn’t put it past the Overlord to want this merchant for his information and Palmere was a stooge all along.” Helle offers

“There were quite a few assassination attempts and people who didn’t belong. It could be any number of factions that wanted the Virdistan dead.” Haimish offers

“I think I’m going to go visit this Lord Burghondy and see if my elven noble can coax anything out of him.” Xanthos advises and gets up to leave.

“You need some muscle?” Kessen asks

“No, I’ll be fine. As long as he thinks I’m a noble I think I’ll be okay.” Xanthos declines and exits the temple

Haimish raps his fingers across his forehead and stops abruptly and rises, “I’ll be back.” The trueborn announces and exits the temple as well.

Haimish nearly collides with Xanthos who was heading back into the temple, “Forget something?” 

“Sort of, Lord Burghondy’s address.” Xanthos explains

“Well come with me, maybe I can give you some more background on Burghondy before you reach him?” Haimish offers

“Do tell.” Xanthos follows as Haimish leads him to the Bardic College and asks for an audience with the teacher he met a few days earlier, the pair are escorted in and given seats in a vacant auditorium.

“What is it that I can do for you?” Professor Brown asks as a middle aged man of fifty years enters the auditorium amidst a flurry of cloaks and scarves. 

“We need some information on Lord Burghondy, I’ve come with payment.” Haimish relates. Xanthos shifts nervously in his seat eyeballing the exit hoping Haimish didn’t mean to trade him for the info.

“And what sort of news do you bring?” Professor Brown inquires

Haimish retells the story of Doopa and Menthos holding Kalen and jamming the liquid sun down the vampire’s throat. Even going so far as to have Xanthos turn into a living replica of Kalen and demonstrating on him. The performance is well received and Professor Brown elects to part with some knowledge of Lord Burghondy.

“The visiting Virdistan merchant did not stay with Lord Palmere last night, he stayed with Lord Burghondy and is still there this morning. Whatever deal was being brokered, it involved the movement of millions of platinum and pounds of diamonds. In all my years I have never seen such an amassment of wealth in one place.” Professor Brown concludes

“How do you know all of this?” Xanthos inquires

“I’m a bard we defeat our enemies by knowing their weaknesses much in the same way I already know yours.” Professor Brown explains to Xanthos, who them turns to face Haimish who gives back a sheepish grin.

“Where does Lord Burghondy reside?” Haimish asks

“In the northwest quarter by the docks, which is convenient considering the payment is due to leave the docks later tonight.” Professor Brown explains

Xanthos and Haimish are led out of the college where Xanthos asks, “What did you tell them about me?”

“It wasn’t just you, and nothing anybody who pays attention to you long enough couldn’t figure out anyway. All I did was save them the trouble of having to find it out themselves.” Haimish explains

“I’m going to still have that chat with Burghondy, and then I’ll…. Do something else.” Xanthos advises, trying to be not as forthcoming with his whereabouts as he just added Haimish to the short list of people who were likely not to be trusted, Menthos being the other person on that list.

“Sure thing, I’ll be expecting the unexpected then.” Haimish responds with a smile and bounds away down the street whistling along.

Xanthos sighed heavily, his indoctrination into the civilized lands was fraught deceptions and half-truths, as someone used to the exacting way of nature it didn’t sit well with the shifter. It wasn’t until after he had transformed into his elven noble role did Xanthos realize he too was playing something he’s not, but his own eyes he was being true to himself and nature and he wondered to what Menthos and Haimish were true to.

Xanthos was met at the entrance to the gated estate by a contingent of well armed mercenaries. After asking to speak with Lord Burghondy, a house slave is sent to speak with Xanthos.

“What do you want?” the slave inquires

“Where’s Lord Burghondy?” Xanthos asks

“Performing his duties as a merchant lord.” The slave replies

“Where was Lord Burghondy last night?” Xanthos prods

“Why? Did you have a meeting scheduled? I’m pretty sure he cleared his calendar for last night, I’m sorry if you didn’t receive notice. Leave me your name and I’ll have you contacted for a replacement session.” The slave offers

“No I didn’t have an appointment, can I get one? When do you expect him to return?” Xanthos asks

“I am not privy to the whims of my master, what is your name and what is the meeting regarding?” the slave inquires

“Tymoult Eveningstar, and it’s regarding the massacre at Lord Palmere’s party last night, I’m just researching some loose ends.” Xanthos explains

“And you think Lord Burghondy had some kind of role in that? It is not Lord Burghondy’s fault Jin Palmere was out of his league and couldn’t close the deal. Maybe you’re playing for the wrong team?” the slave relates and leaves Xanthos standing at the gate as he retreats to the estate.

Convinced ever more firmly now that Lord Burghondy had offed Lord Palmere, Xanthos also noted how the slave did not refer to him as Lord Palmere but used what sounded like his non-titled name, as if Lord Burghondy’s house knew how the court proceedings were going to play out. 

Xanthos raced back to the Temple of Kador to meet with the party to discuss plans for Lord Palmere.

“I say we keep him like this until we get proof on Lord Burghondy and spring the trap then.” Kessen offers

“Doopa thinks we should throw statue at Lord Birkenstock and kill both with one throw.” Doopa proudly announces

“I think we should raid that barge and steal the money for ourselves.” Chimed in Turgar

“I think both are bad ideas, if you think that barge won’t be guarded by things that would ensure a safe journey for tens of millions of gold then I want what you’re smoking and showing up with a fugitive from the Courts of Maal will just get you thrown in jail along with Lord Palmere.” Haimish advises

“Why would that be? We’re bringing him in for justice, why arrest us?” Xanthos asks

“The Overlord isn’t rational it’s all law all the time. If you show up on with him in tow then obviously we were harboring a known fugitive from the law.” Haimish explains 

“We could say we found him and were bringing him in.” Xanthos offers

“Better to let the authorities find him and bring him in, if you go down there now Lord Burghondy will have you arrested as well.” Helle offers

“What is with you guys? After I came back with my news from Lord Burghondy’s place you’ve all turned gutless. I’m no fan of the law just like the rest of you, but this is bordering on oppressive paranoia.” Xanthos relates

“It matters not now; I’ve had the package delivered.” Statinisor explains 

“I guess he’s right it doesn’t matter now.” Kessen sighs annoyed the option was removed by someone other than himself

Statinisor and Helle begin to leave as Xanthos shouts back at them, “And were your handlers arrested?! And were they arrested?!” Xanthos throws his hands down in exasperation as the rest of the party stares at him.

“What?!” Xanthos shouts

“I don’t think you’re thinking clearly.” Menthos offers his only part in the conversation

“Oooh the temple’s whipping boy speaks.” Xanthos responds

“I don’t think you’re being careful.” Haimish replies 

Menthos and Haimish get up to follow the two priests; they are then followed by Doopa, leaving Xanthos, Kessen and Turgar to ponder in silence.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Mark of an Assassin*

“Pfft, we don’t need those guys. I think we can cause enough chaos at the docks to get us some of that platinum before anyone realizes it’s missing.” Kessen advises Xanthos and Turgar

“I could transform into a dolphin or a rock crab and work loose some ties or create a leak and we can loot the sunken barge further down the river.” Xanthos suggests

“I say we go for it, agreed?” Kessen asks

Xanthos readily accepts, but Turgar find it difficult to shake what the people who’ve spent the most time in Highcastle have been saying, plus the reasoning that the barge would be guarded extremely well, began to wedge it’s way back into Turgar’s psyche. 

“I’ve changed my mind, I’m going sewer sweeping with them.” Turgar finally said and headed off to follow the other half of the party

“Well, more for us I guess and after this score we won’t need them anymore anyway.” Kessen advises 

Turgar catches up as Menthos is explaining the duties to everyone.

“They lost two groups of priests; both groups had six members in them. The first group they sent down four days ago, the second group two days ago, nothing has been heard from them since. We’re likely to come across various members of other churches and maybe a patrol or two from the Overlord. None of them should be there and if no one in those groups returns to their point of origin alive we needn’t have to worry about repercussions if you catch my drift.” Menthos says winking

The party nods and heads down a set of ancient stone steps that descend at a steep angle underneath the temple. As they progress along the steps the party feels a weight they hadn’t noticed before lifted from their shoulders momentarily and replaced with another different weight. The procession of warriors stopped as in unison they noticed the subtle change, all but Menthos who noticed not a lifting of weight but the placement of it.

“Whew, it’s oppressive down here, who in their right mind would want to be down here anyway?” Menthos states

“I rather find it calming like a warm blanket, albeit a huge sized and heavy one.” Haimish notes

“I’d say the same thing, like going from anxiety to a gregarious seizure.” Turgar adds

“Doopa think it smell funny.” The ogre wades into the conversation

As the party reaches the bottom of the stairs, in the middle of a great room, a grand mosaic is displayed along the walls and floor of the room depicting primitive humanoids receiving the gift of fire from a human shaped being with a living flame atop his head. Reluctant at first to accept the gift the races eventually relent and are seen cooking their food, lighting their caves, walking beneath stars, and fending off wild beasts. Eventually the gift is seen as leading the races to settle down and build cities.

“This Kador guy is sure full of himself, no mention at all about the role dragons played in prying you people from the muck of humanity.” Turgar says inferring to Haimish

Haimish observes that the ceiling at one time had a mosaic as well, but he paint has flaked off and the faint outline remaining is too dim to make out any longer. 

The room has three exits one to the west, one to the north, and the last to the northeast. They decide to head north first and after short twenty foot walk down the north corridor, they come to a closed heavy wooden door. Haimish places an ear to the door, but alas Doopa’s stomach fails to keep quiet and Haimish hears nothing from the other side of the door. Giving the ogre a displeasured look, Haimish backs away and tells Doopa to listen.

“Doopa not hear anything with door closed.” And the barbarian promptly heaves the door open, tearing it off its hinges in the process. Splinters of dirt and metal hinges go flying back down the corridor to the great room. 

“EEEEYYYYEEE, keep the horses away form me!” A voice shouts from within the room

“Are you from the lost Kador search party?” Haimish asks to no response

“Are from the lost Donner party?” Menthos asks to no response either

“Are you even lost?” Turgar asks to no response

“Do you hear anything now?” Doopa shouts

The party enters the room and spies a huddled man in ragged clothes crouched against the back wall opposite the door.

“Keep the horses away from me!” The man shouts

“What horses? We don’t have any.” Haimish replies

As the light from the great room begins to disperse some of the darkness in this room, the party can make out the unkempt beaded face of a man.

“Doopa say we kill him if he not from temple.” The ogre announces

“Wait, I don’t think he’s a threat. Sure he looks haggard, but those eyes speak to me of a soul in torment and the way the sweat beads on his brow suggests a man who’s spent his entire life laboring under the suns rays.” Haimish explains

“What kind of crap was that? You heard the priests, if his not one of them, kill it.” Menthos reminds the bard

Haimish ignores the warlock and approaches the scared man, “would you like some cheese or a piece of bread?” Haimish produces both from inside his cloak

“Doopa wise enough to know you don’t feed the wild animals, you kill them and then you feed the wild animals to your stomach.” Doopa advises

“I do not wish this poor soul harmed while I yet live, I will get him to leave and not bother the priests, you need not worry about him he’s not going anywhere.” Haimish announces

“That’s mighty pretentious of one, what makes you think I won’t kill him?” Menthos inquires

“The downside of being better than everyone else is that people tend to assume you're pretentious.” Haimish responds

“You’re full of crap.” Menthos informs Haimish

After waiting for Haimish to feed the unstable man, the party returns to the great room and heads to the west exit.

“If he’s gone when we come back, you’ll have to explain that to Statinisor, because I sure am not.” Menthos states

“He’ll be there.” Haimish responds

The west corridor goes thirty feet then turns south for twenty feet then back west and ends in a door. Haimish hands Doopa the rest of his bread and waits for the ogre’s stomach to stop complaining before listening to this door as well. The bard picks up a distinctive hissing sound.

“Snakes.” Haimish speaks aloud

“Yummy.” Doopa replies

Haimish looks back at Turgar and Menthos who shrug their shoulders, he then turns to Doopa and bows away from the door, offering the obstacle to the ogre. Doopa grabs his club and smashes down the down with one swing. His proud demeanor is reduced to astonishment as twin daggers are plunged into Doopa’s back and a giant snake head lashes from beyond the doorway and plants it’s fangs into Doopa’s left shoulder.

Menthos and Turgar leap back as Haimish slams his shield at the head of the snake; however a leathery wing slips in front of his blow and takes the full brunt of Haimish’s slam. Doopa twists away from the bite and the snake tears away a hunk of muscle from Doopa’s shoulder.

Menthos launches an eldritch blast into the snake’s head as the settling debris brings the body of the snake in focus. The thing flies with the aid of two massive leather wings, two short arms sprout from the body, and each wields a wickedly curved dagger. The eyes of the thing are not reptile like but are red and irisless not unlike a demon’s.

Turgar quickly brings up his helpful aura and steps in to take Doopa’s place in front of the creature. Menthos watches as the color from Doopa’s face drains away and realizes he’s been poisoned.

“The bite and maybe the daggers are poisonous.” The teifling explains

Haimish blocks both dagger thrusts from the snake with his shield, then dodges the bite as he slams his shield into the midsection of the snake and then slashes his blade across it’s “belly”.

The thing wails in pain as it buffets the bard with its wings and snaps its tail at Haimish’s shield and wrapping its tail around the shield wrist of the bard. Doopa swings weakly at the creature, missing it however, but forcing it to turn sideways in the door and dragging Haimish between it and Doopa as it turns. Menthos sends another blast into the creature, as Turgar hacks at the thing’s tail, trying to get it to release Haimish’s shield arm.

Haimish lets momentum carry him into the room so he is now flanking the creature with Turgar and Haimish swings at the snake’s head. Doopa collapses to the floor and his breathing becomes laborious as blood weeps from his shoulder like a cracked dam.

The snake spins it’s tail in a tight circle and flings Haimish into the center of the room, it then turns it’s attentions to Turgar who drops his healing aura for a protection one just as it snakes twin daggers slash just short of the dragon shaman, the head however bites deeply into Turgar’s arm and thrashes back and forth ripping the flesh as it spills it’s venom into the wound.

Using the preoccupation the snake was having with Turgar’s arm, Menthos launches an eldritch blast into the left eye of the snake thing and it immediately lets go of Turgar’s arm. Haimish gets up and pounces on the snake ramming his shield’s lower point into it’s back and in a powerful slash he cuts off the right arm of the snake.

Bleeding and disorientated, the snake creature tries to back up against a wall, but its flight wavers as Turgar cuts off a wing and Menthos uses the flanking ogre and human to deliver the death blow with an eldritch blast down the thing’s mouth, destroying the lower jaw.

The heroes pick up Doopa and race back to the stairs to return to the temple for some healing for Doopa.

Meanwhile Xanthos and Kessen circle the exterior of Highcastle until they can spot the docks from across the estuary. Ogres and minotaurs each baring the symbol of Carnack load crates unto a huge barge parked at the end of the Burghondy’s dock. Dozens of scrags patrol the water around the barge; Xanthos spots a wyvern attempting to camouflage itself in the thickets on the far side of the estuary from where he and Kessen crouched.

“How do you want to do this? I should fire some flame arrows unto the barge and then you swim underneath it?” Kessen asks

“We’re woefully unprepared for this, I think we should wait and see have much of those are part of the traveling retinue.” Xanthos responds

“Chaos works best when it’s not planned, the longer we wait the greater the chance we’ll be found out.” Kessen advises

“Still I… Did you feel that?” Xanthos stops mid thought and asks as he feels the presence of someone else, only not physically, more like a mental brush stroke.

“Feel what?” Kessen replies

“We need to get out of here, now!” Xanthos states as he grabs Kessen’s hand and drags him away from the water’s edge.

The shifter doesn’t let up until they are back inside Highcastle’s walls, “What was that for? I thought we were on the same page?” Kessen asks

“Our position was compromised, no matter what we tried to do; I don’t think it would’ve surprised them at all.” Xanthos warns 

“That sucks, it was a great plan. How do I know you didn’t get cold feet? Or that you’re not planning to go back there later?” Kessen demands

“You don’t but feel free to get yourself killed, I’m not going back.” Xanthos states and walks away heading for the inn where he agreed to meet with who he hoped were members of the assassin’s guild.

Dejected, Kessen however returned to the Temple of Kador, where he hoped the party he tried to leave was having a good adventure. He would make them see they needed a scout’s skills.

Xanthos waited out the night in the inn anticipating his meeting but no one ever showed, depressed and downtrodden, Xanthos reluctantly returned to the temple to rejoin the rest of the party, unaware that for the entire night doppelgangers monitored his every move, and two master assassins waited outside his door for the chance to surprise the shifter when he left his room. When Xanthos opened his door in the morning there was no evidence anything was amiss.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Birth of a devil*

Doopa’s weighty limp body is dumped upon the stone floor of the rectory after being dragged up a flight of steep steps by the party. 

“Rats too big for you?” Helle asks as he looks over the greenish ogre

“More like flying snakes with wings and daggers, I’ve heard of alligators in the sewers before growing to huge size, but never snakes in the cellars sprouting wings and using daggers.” Haimish advises

“Interesting, so you found the lost priests then?” Helle inquires

“No, we found an idiot who has Equinophobia, other than that the snake thing was the next thing we found.” Haimish relates amid a surprised look from Turgar and Menthos at the word Equinophobia.

“The crazed individual is dead then?” Helle asks

“Sure, and if he’s not I’ll draw a picture of a horse on the inside of the door and he’ll starve himself.” Haimish states

“Can we get a little poison removal for the pitiful ogre there? He was showboating and got stabbed during the performance.” Turgar relates

Helle removes the poison from Doopa’s veins; Doopa gives the priest a “thanks” and to test out his muscles, punches Turgar in the face, breaking his nose. The two ogres lock themselves in hand-to-hand combat as the rest of the party filters out of the room and shut the door behind them.

“Any damage they do comes out of your pay.” Helle eyes Menthos

“It’s good for them, we only need one ogre anyway,  besides there can be only one alpha male so I don’t know why they’re fighting for breeding rights we don’t have any females in the party. Not even Xanthos will go there.” Menthos states

“Anyway, your scout returned while you were down there. I guess he missed your smile, there was no sign of the shifter though.” Helle advises

“The more the merrier, I feel a song coming on.” Haimish announces as he clears his throat.

Menthos however shoves his hand over Haimish’s mouth, “Not now, I’m hungry and I don’t want to lose my appetite.” 

Kessen is led to the party as the rectory door flings open and a haggard Doopa staggers through the portal and collapses after a few shaky steps. Turgar follows soon after, his dragon aura glowing through the billowing dust cloud between the two combatants, “Ha! I can go all night, next time you want to do this again, let me know.” Turgar says to the beaten Doopa.

“What did I miss?” Kessen asks

“Ogre mating ritual, looks like Turgar won. But I think the real winner is Doopa.” Menthos says with a toothy smile

“Well then looks like I was wise to study ogre anatomy in case I need to take one down with one arrow shot.” Kessen responds

“I’m not healing him again.” Helle states and leads the two humans and the teifling to the second floor of the temple, “The high priest has invited you to stay the night here, feel free to use the facilities to better prepare yourselves for tomorrow’s foray.”

Haimish and Kessen claim their rooms as Helle holds Menthos back, “Your room is not on this floor.” The pyromancer states

Helle leads Menthos to the opposite side of the temple and then descends two flights of stairs, passing through the acolyte’s area and beyond a laboratory. To finally a large opulent bedroom, “this will be your room for the evening.” 

A shocked Menthos is stunned to speechlessness as he stammers through a thanks and runs to the bed to leap upon it.

“I’ll definitely be sleeping good tonight, the ogres snore too much for anyone to get a good night’s rest. Except maybe Xanthos when he turns himself deaf.” Menthos relates

“I don’t think you’ll be sleeping in here that well tonight though.” Helle smirks as he slips from the room and closes the door behind him.

Menthos races for the door, only to find his side of the door contains no handle or knob with which to use to open the door. The teifling begins banging on the door screaming for Helle, Haimish, even Doopa. To no avail. After an hour of fruitless shouting, Menthos retreats form the door and begins to search the room. He uncovers symbols etched into the floor and into the ceiling above the bed. 

Using his warlock senses he discovers all of the symbols radiate magic, and that there are a couple invisible symbols that float in midair near the bed. Studying them closely, Menthos is unable to determine their nature or function. After another hour the door opens and Fyrhe steps through. Menthos bull rushes her out of the way trying to reach the door, but it is pulled shut as his fingernails scrape against the side of the door. 

“Why do you want out?” Fyrhe

“I’m trapped in here, there’s no way out. Unless you know how to…” It was then that Menthos noticed Fyhre wore no clothing

“The yelling has ceased, I believe the plan is commencing.” Helle reports to Statinisor

“Excellent, make sure the gate preparation are proceeding as planned. I don’t want to lose another one to miscalculations.” The high priest grits through his teeth.

As the sun rose above the city of Highcastle, Menthos awoke to the rays warming his forehead and small horns. He shot up in bed and raced to the window to view the courtyard below, wondering if last night had been all a dream. He chuckled thinking he had dreamt the whole affair, it wasn’t until he raises his hands to his face to run his hair back that his nose told him it wasn’t a dream. His nose smelled her, smelled her on his fingertips, his arms, his hair. 

Anger boiled up inside him at the thought of his imprisonment, then subsided at the thoughts of his “cellmate”, as if on cue, the door to his room was opened and Helle walked in bearing a plate of fruits and breakfast meats.

“You’re probably famished after last night, so here’s a few things to regain your strength.” Helle says

“What was last night all about?” Menthos questions

“You performed a great service for Kador, one that you shall be rewarded with in time.” Helle says

“What? You’re running a brothel out of here?” Menthos inquires

“Hardly, there are a number of ways my deity expands his armies. Last night you participated in one of the ways. You should be proud to have been chosen to perform such a duty, I only hope to be chosen for a role.” Helle relates

“What happened to Fyhre?” Menthos asks

“You’ll see her again, in her new incarnation and then your greatest wish will be answered.” Helle replies

“That makes no sense and you sound like that damnable Haimish when you talk like that.” Menthos responds angrily

“Your anger is misplaced, you should be more worried about yourself or any of your other compatriots.” Helle advises

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Menthos demands

“The assassin’s guild is hunting your shifter, normally I’d tell you if you needed his body for something to seek out the morgue, however he showed up here just this hour and is talking with the dragon shaman as we speak. If he goes back out into the city he’ll be killed. It matters not to us which way you prefer him, considers this my attempt to allay your suspicions about last night.” Helle relates

“How do you know this?” Menthos asks

“Also if he leaves and you follow him or try to protect him, expect to have to deal with the assassins as well.” Helle says ignoring Menthos’ question

“That’s not what I asked.” Menthos states

Helle finishes dispensing some wine and excuses himself from the room refusing to answer any more of Menthos’ questions.

In the bowels of the temple in a room adorned with divine symbols and a one-way gate with the receiving end set up in the room, a nude creature claws it’s way to a open exit. Statinisor admires the creature’s determination as the female’s face rears up at the high priest, pleading for the pain to stop. Statinisor presses his index finger to his lips to hush the woman. 

Two short tears appear on the woman’s back and a shower of blood sprays across the ceiling, two black leathery wings erupt from the open wounds and unfold stretching their newly formed muscles. The woman’s nails lengthen and blacken, in an instant, forming claws that will rip through wood as if it were papyrus. The woman’s pained eyes redden as her irises turn blood red and bleed into her pupils.

A burst of flames pulses from her form and the body collapses amid the steam and soot of the transformation. Statinisor orders some accompanying pyromancers into the room to retrieve. He stops them as they reach him to pass into the hallway. Statinisor raises the head of the creature and admires how much more beautiful the former Fyhre has become.

“Take her to the Sun Aerie, tonight we celebrate!” Statinisor commands


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> “Ogre mating ritual, looks like Turgar won. But I think the real winner is Doopa.” Menthos says with a toothy smile





That's hilarious! I wish my own games had as many memorable quotes as yours...


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*What about Bob?*

Menthos gets dressed and joins the rest of the party who are eating breakfast, he grabs an empty chair and forces his way in-between Haimish and Kessen.

“What is your problem?” Kessen rattles off

Ignoring him Menthos whispers to Haimish, “We have a problem.”

“Yeah? You want to do this now? Can I get my shield and sword upstairs first or are you going to make me kick your ass barehanded?” Haimish responds softly

“What?” Menthos blurts, taken aback by the bard’s comment

“I’m just joking with you, you know? I’m a bard I tell jokes and juggle things for money, I’m no paladin.” Haimish answers

“Well, you might want to look into it; Xanthos is being hunted by the assassin’s guild.” Menthos lays it out for Haimish

“Pfft. Big surprise there, Lord Burghondy probably contracted the entire guild after him.” Haimish replied

Although Menthos hadn’t said it yet, Haimish’s mind had already worked out what Menthos replied with, “There is no collateral damage cap for that guild, if you’re with him when they strike, you’ll be killed as well.” Menthos retorted

“MM HMM, does he know?” Haimish inquires

“I don’t think so, but I do think they know where he is.” Menthos responds

“Wait, how do you know about this?” Haimish asks

“Helle told me.” Menthos answers

“How does he know?” Haimish asks, he voice getting louder with each reply

“Good question, however I really didn’t want to explore that line of questioning with him in light of recent events.” Menthos answers

Haimish stares into the teifling’s red coal eyes, hoping for an elaboration. When it becomes apparent none would be forthcoming, Haimish lowers his eyes and replies, “We’ll have to make a decision.”

“I’ve already made mine; you can form one on your own. I’m not living my life scared spitless inside this temple waiting for them to pick me off.” Menthos states

“You’re going to fight them then?” Haimish inquires, impressed with the warlock’s bravado

“Hell no, I’m getting out of this town.” Menthos answers then unseats himself and finds a washroom to clean himself up in.

Haimish stands up at the table and clears his throat to address the remaining party members, “Friends, acquaintances, people who I only know by smell, it has come to my attention that one of us has been marked for death. While some of you may or may not be surprised by that, I assure you that it’s probably not who you think it is.” Haimish says staring at Kessen

“If we leave here with the marked person, we’ll all be killed if we get in the way.” Haimish continues

“Uh, shouldn’t we be going to the Courts with this information?” Xanthos asks

“Why? If it’s a legal contract then the judge would have you executed while you stand in his courtroom and you would have only saved the guild the trouble of finding you.” Helle interjects

“What kind of justice is that? Seems heavy handed to me.” Turgar speaks

“Welcome to Maal.” Answers Helle

“Who is it? Who’s do I need to push Menthos in front of so he gets killed as well?” Kessen inquires

“Does it matter? We’ve all known each other long enough that I think we would not want something bad to happen to any one of us.” Haimish advises

“Well, if it’s Menthos, I’m all for alerting the guild of his exact bedroom location.” Kessen announces

“As do I, his friends leave a burning taste in the mouth.” Xanthos adds

“That’s surprising, considering it was Menthos who told me the guild was looking for you Xanthos.” Haimish gushes before his brain can get his mouth closed

“What! Me? Why would they be looking for me unless one of you has been backstabbing us all along?” Xanthos erupts from his chair and slams his fist to the table

“Are you serious? Who went and tried to talk to the platinum lord? Who’s been talking to the constables? Who tried to get a meeting set up with the thieves’ guild? Not any of the rest of us.” Haimish answers

“Yeah, even Doopa know you don’t poke snake then blame it when you get bit. ‘Course Doopa smash snake after it bites, but not out of disbelief of its actions.” Doopa states

“When did you grow a brain?” Kessen says to Doopa, “Besides, you should all feel grateful that Xanthos had the courage to follow up on those leads. While you guys were all hawing over your kill, Xanthos was out there trying to find the why.” Kessen defends the shifter

Menthos however could not locate a washroom; he did however find a small tub of water on an altar in a priest’s room and washed his face and hands in that water. He then made his way back to the group and found them arguing amongst themselves.

“Who’s up for some more searches and rescues?” Menthos announces

Haimish acknowledges the warlock and leave the argument, soon followed by the rest of the party one by one.  

“Where did you go this morning? Off to tell the assassin’s guild where Xanthos is?” Kessen accuses

Menthos stops in his tracks and turns on Kessen, “No, I had to wash my face, it took a while to find a basin of water, luckily some priest had a bowl up on his personal altar in his room.” 

“You realize that was holy water you just ruined?” Turgar asks

“Really? I wondered why it tingled a little; I probably shouldn’t have rinsed my mouth out with the water then. Or used his raiment to wash some body parts clean.” Menthos admits

“You’re going to hell with open arms.” Kessen points out

“If it gives good hugs, I’m there!” Menthos admits

The party makes their way down to the cellars and locates two surviving members of one of the initial Kador search parties that were trapped by the flying snake creature. The party points out the way to the exit and continues onward, finally locating another set of stairs going further down. They traverse these stairs and come upon a twisting mass of catacombs that stretch out like impact fractures.

“This looks like a sewer system, smells like one too.” Kessen advises

“Are you sure this is under Kador control? This seems like a sewer just as Kessen states.” Xanthos adds

“Why would they lie? Besides I’m committed to finding the second group of priests anyway.” Menthos replies

 The party lets Kessen, the scout, randomly pick a tunnel as the seepage has ruined any tracks he might have been able to find. Heading off in that direction the party passes up several intersections and causeways that give Xanthos a growing feeling of concern.

“Shouldn’t we be marking which tunnels we’re in so we don’t keep going in circles?” The shifter asks

“Why? Don’t trust the scout to know where he’s going?” Kessen lashes back

“It’s not that, just that all of these tunnels look alike, I can’t tell which way is north.” Xanthos admits

“You don’t need to know which way is north, only which way is up. That’s the most important.” Kessen advises

“Well, what if you want to know which way is out?” Turgar asks

“That’s back that way.” A strange voice announces

The party scrambles for defensive positioning as Menthos runs to the side of the party opposite from where the voice came from and Kessen draws two arrow and pulls back on the bowstring ready to let them fly. Xanthos shifts into a tiger ready to pounce on whatever moves. The two ogres both try to charge the voice, however their girths won’t fit in the tunnel simultaneously and they get stuck as a green skinned reptile eyed male steps forward.

“Do not be alarmed, I merely seek to leave this wretched place as well.” The stranger states

“We’re under orders, to whom are you affiliated with?” Menthos asks

“I own allegiance only to myself, perhaps we can find the way together?” the stranger says

“Who is it you know the way but can’t find it?” Haimish asks

“Ooh, good question Hammy.” Menthos says

“Your party seems lacking in the trap removal skill set, maybe we started out on the wrong foot? Hello, my name is Bob and I am a fellow traveler.” Bob offers his hand to shake

“Well, you seem trustworthy, join our cause.” Xanthos states

“Really?” Bob answers shockingly

“No. Kill the assassin!” Xanthos screams as a black whip cracks from behind the party, ripping into Haimish’s chain shirt and gouging out a trench in his back.

“Ambush!” Haimish gets out as a greataxe wielding, silver haired orc rushes the two ogres. The orc slams the weapon into the shoulder of Turgar and the dragon shaman is forcibly dislodged from his stuck position next to Doopa. 

“Protect Xanthos!” Kessen calls out and lets his arrows fly towards the orc. The beast swats them aside with his axe.

Bob casts _light_ and illuminates the passageway, revealing the wielder of the whip as a drow dressed in all black. The drow covers his eyes from the glow and shadow jumps next to Xanthos and jabs a dripping dagger into the shifter’s ribs. The world spins as the poison takes hold and Xanthos passes out.

Turgar grasps his shoulder and activates his healing aura, long enough to get slow the blood flow before the orc brings his axe to bear upon Turgar’s shoulder again, this time cutting all the way to the bone and rendering Turgar’s right arm useless.

Doopa sets up to meet the orc threat, “Hey, silverback. I got a banana for you.” Doopa’s club slams into the left knee of the orc and bounces off in a sick thud. Doopa could almost imagine the bruise forming from the internal bleeding and a prideful smile broke out upon his face. Until the drow shadow jumped again into the back of Doopa with another dagger, Doopa tried to wrench the blade from his back but couldn’t quite reach it.

This of course caused his attentions to turn away from the orc and his massive cutting tool that it used to plow a row through Doopa’s abdomen. Doopa tried to double over in pain, but the placement of the dagger caused him to tear through back muscles as he bent over, sending pain up through his back and forcing him to stand straight up again and pump even more blood from his stomach wound.

Menthos fired off an eldritch blast into the orc, as Kessen launched two more arrows, both hit this time. Haimish charged the drow and managed to whack it’s face with his shield, causing the assassin to shadow jump back behind the orc and crack it’s whip into the shoulder of the upright Doopa, the whip was fashioned with barbs, glass, small razors, and thorns and tore off flesh as it retreated back to the drow. Doopa slumped against the near wall as the he felt the strength drain away from his back and stomach and now his shoulder burned hot with the open wound caused by the whip.


----------



## Jon Potter

YIKES!!!

And I thought some of my ambushes were cruel...

That was a thing of beauty.   



			
				Hairy Monotaur said:
			
		

> “Yeah, even Doopa know you don’t poke snake then blame it when you get bit".




I love this variation on the Benjamin Franklin quote in your sig. Every time I read that I think that there's got to be a way to incorporate it into my game.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Nudge, nudge. Wink, wink.*

Bob reaches out and presses his hand into the wound on Doopa’s shoulder, Doopa quickly reaches up to shove the hand away however another assault by the orc assassin causes Doopa to deflect the battle axe blow instead. Warm healing magic pours into the wound and soon the shoulder is nearly healed. 

Menthos launches another eldritch blast into the burly orc, giving the beast a clear burn mark in the middle of its abdomen just above the navel. Haimish advances to Xanthos and staunches the bleeding as best he can. 

The drow shadow jumps to the rear of the party again and lashes at Menthos, but fails to connect. Haimish moves on to Turgar and tourniquets his shoulder and gives the ogre mouth to mouth trying to resuscitate the dragon shaman. Doopa feels his strength return in his damaged shoulder and switches on his internal rage-o-meter into high gear. His breaths come in greats heaves and he begins to foam at the mouth as his chest puffs up like a toad’s throat as it calls for his mate, so does the barbarian call for his – War.

Doopa begins swinging wildly across the corridor, catching the orc off guard. The assassin begins to back peddle and recognizing his vulnerability, using his knowledge of tender spots, Menthos slams another eldritch blast into the face of the orc this time. Temporarily blinding the assassin, that’s all the opening Doopa needed as the ogre soon reduces the orc to a bloody pool of pus. 

“AAARRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!! Doopa is mightiest!!!!” The ogre shouts

Haimish and Menthos quickly search for the drow who seems for the moment to have retreated, they’ve also lost sight of Bob. Soon Xanthos is brought back to consciousness and he heals himself and then heals Turgar enough to bring him to the point where the dragon shaman can help himself.

“You guys should go on without me” Xanthos advises

“What do you mean? We just kicked their ass. I bet that drow is running back to it’s mommy right now. Reminds of that time I had two hands in the bush and didn’t know my feet were trampled.” Haimish replies

“I beg to differ, they’ll be back stronger and with more of them. None of us are safe, I agree with the tree humper he should stay behind so that the rest of us can live.” Menthos argues

“You’d sacrifice him?” Turgar asks in disbelief

“What? It’s win-win, they get their mark and we get to live, personally I see nothing wrong with cutting loose the corpse before it starts stinking.” Menthos answers

“You’re a heartless bastard.” Turgar responds

“So?” Menthos replies

“Somebody dead?” Doopa interjects

“No, nobody died. Xanthos you can’t just stay here and wait for death, you’ve already accomplished so much. Besides I don’t know how to write a good tragedy, so you’re going to have to stick around so I can give you a proper dirge.” Haimish explains

“How about we kill the warlock and then offer him up as Xanthos.” Kessen says notching an arrow at Menthos

“Bah! That would only prolong the inevitable and make me the tragic hero, and your feeble ego couldn’t take that.” Menthos advises

“I don’t want any of you to die because they want me. I only wish I could meet Lord Burghondy and roast him slowly over a candle for weeks on end.” Xanthos relates

“Well, now you’re speaking my language.” Menthos states

“What language is that, regret?” Kessen asks

“No, I say we conceal him and leave the orc here in the passage after we strip the beast, then we make our way back to the surface and burn down the assassin’s guild. Who’s with me!” Menthos rants

“I saw your ego flee about half an hour ago, and by the looks of it your pride is packing up for a similar trip.” Turgar says

“Doopa likes trips, Doopa took trip to Highcastle once.” The ogre announces

“You’re still here too.” Turgar advises him

“I don’t want to burden you if keeping me around is going to bring you certain death, if it means that much to you Menthos and I can find the last of the lost priests.” Xanthos offers

“Whoa, whoa, whoa there horsy. Unless you’re going to practice your female, hot, busty,  dawn elf form, then I’m not interested in doing anything with the words you and ! in the title.” Menthos counters

“Well, whatever we decide to do, that’s decide quickly before that drow comes back, it had a nasty whip that I don’t want to feel on my skin.” Haimish advises

“Xanthos stay close to me I will protect you, on my word as the son of Gnashdrool the Shaky, you will not die today!” Turgar shouts

“Gnashdrool? Gnashdrool died after falling 4 miles off a cliff after slipping in own feces. Doopa tribe throw big party after that.” Doopa announces

Turgar slams his fist into Doopa’s face and their fight that started upstairs moves into round two.

“Guys, break it up or get a room. This touch fest is making me uncomfortable.” Menthos advises

“Those two are going to kill each other before long, see we need you to come along Xanthos, otherwise we lose most of our toe-to-toe offense.” Kessen reasons

“Pfft, who needs offense when you have my abilities, I want you to come along because every stand up guy needs a good straight man.” Menthos answers

“Hey, quit shoe horning your way into my act.” Haimish rebuts

“Come along with us at least until we try to get you out of this predicament.” Kessen pleads

Xanthos agrees and breaks apart the two battling ogres. The party soon finds the remnants of the last missing priests and leads them back to the surface. The Kadorians are overjoyed that they didn’t totally lose either group. Haimish tells Xanthos he wants to try something first and heads off to start his plan, meanwhile Menthos meets with Helle over the situation with Xanthos.

“So, you found out about the contract. How can he get out of it? The rest of the group wants to drag him along, probably because it annoys me, and constantly having to look over my shoulder for assassination attempts is going to give me a nasty crick in my neck.” Menthos advises

“You could buyout the contract, likely for ten thousand gold. Otherwise you’re going to need to give the guild something that the originator of the contract cannot.” Helle advises

“What would that be? We already know it’s got to be Lord Burghondy who wants Xanthos dead. What do I have that Lord Burghondy cannot give?” Menthos asks

“Your soul upon death.” Helle answers

“What? That’s a little steep there do you think?” Menthos replies

“When money can buy you any material possession, you have to give something money can’t buy.” Helle answers

“Well, it’s not going to be that or the ten thousand, and why would ten thousand work anyway?” Menthos inquires

“It would bribe an assassin to stage his death and deliver a mutilated head in place of the real mark. Assassins like it as they get all the money for doing none of the work, takes the danger out of it.” Helle replies

“I’ll have to see what everybody else’s monetary situation is like.” Menthos responds

“Sure, just don’t take too long.” Helle advises

Haimish makes his way quickly to the College of the Bard, he requests to speak with the Head Master and waits only a half hour before ushered back to meet with him.

Haimish spills the current situation to the Head Master replete with embellishes and exaggerations. 

“That’s a mighty fine tale you tell, and I do have something that will help you. But it’s going to cost an awful lot, information like this in the right hands can sunder nations.” The Head Master tells

“How much will it be this time?” Haimish inquires

“Oh it’ll cost you nothing that you will miss. When you’re a bard, you get to see things and speak to people that wizards and faiths often ignore or bypass completely. There’s always a story to be told, a myth to weave, or a tradition to hand down. It is within these that the bard gains his power, each of us has a story to tell and some of us get to tell many stories.” The Master Bard explains

“I don’t follow.” Haimish replies

“Eh, to each his own, do you want the information or not? Secrets are only good until they become known, and this secret won’t stay buried with one man’s death or a thousand men’s deaths.” The Master Bard advises

“What do I have to pay?” Haimish asks

“Come my dear boy, sing me a song of tragic death or maybe a good joke that gets these olds rattling again.” The Head Master slaps Haimish on the back and leads him to the auditorium

Back at the temple, Menthos relates what Helle explained to him about the assassin options.

“Well, that settles it. I’m going to march out there and demand they show themselves and go down with a fight!” Xanthos exclaims

“Wait, Haimish hasn’t returned yet, maybe he’ll bring good news?” Kessen advises

“Doesn’t matter, I feel destined to die at the end of an assassin’s blade.” Xanthos bemoans

“Well, look on the bright side, most people go through life never knowing what their destiny is. You on the other hand know full well you’re going to die a horrible decapitated death at the hands of some filthy orc or drow or maybe even something far worse.” Menthos attempts to cheer up Xanthos 

“You’re not helpful at all.” Xanthos replies

“If you were a woman, I could help you go out with a bang.” Menthos answers

“There’s got to be a spell to take care of that.” Turgar asks aloud to no one in particular

“No, but there is a belt of femininity. At least that would keep him preoccupied with himself instead of us.” Kessen answers laughing

“Vaudeville man back” Doopa shouts as Haimish returns

“Well?” Xanthos says barely able to contain his wonder

“I have the solution.” Haimish explains


----------



## Jon Potter

Well? What is it?

What a way to end the post, HM! You're killing me!

Oh, and:



			
				Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> “Gnashdrool? Gnashdrool died after falling 4 miles off a cliff after slipping in own feces. Doopa tribe throw big party after that.” Doopa announces




I love Doopa.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*The voice of (a) God*

“You need to go to the Overlord.” Haimish explains

“Really, that’s all? What for, if that’s your advice why not just come out and tell him to kill himself? It’s the same thing.” Kessen responds

“Let me finish.” Haimish starts, “Lord Palmere was not the poor victim we all think he was. He had preliminarily reached an agreement with a Virdistan merchant to receive half a ton of a new metal recently unearthed near there. Apparently this unscrupulous merchant decided he’d hedge his bet and also contacted a few other Highcastle merchants, at least one of them replied back. Lord Burghondy, upset he had lost the initial bid, planned to buy into the game again and eliminate the apparently only threat to him winning the bid. Hence Burghondy eliminates Palmere and has him brought up on charges as well, stemming from the demons that ran amok from his abode. Lord Burghondy was wining and dining the Virdistan merchant away from Lord Palmere while we were at the party.”

“What’s so special about the metal that Burghondy would pay millions for it?” Xanthos asks

“It ignores all other metal, so someone could create arrow out of this stuff that would ignore tower shields and full plate and hit the wearer as if he was naked.” Haimish reveals

“You could start a coup with that stuff; you could eliminate most of the city’s forces before anybody could react to what’s happening.” Turgar commented

“Exactly, so you take this info to the Overlord that Lord Burghondy plans to overthrow him. The Overlord is so reactionary; he’ll investigate regardless of whether you have any actual proof. He’ll find the proof and you’ll be a hero and Burghondy will die horribly.” Haimish concludes

“Can we free Lord Palmere with this information?” Xanthos inquires

“Well, you might get his name cleared, but they beheaded Lord Palmere yesterday. The Maalites don’t let people take up space in the jail for long. Then there’s always the matter of informing the Judge he made a mistake, which would most likely be the hardest part of the endeavor.” Haimish states

“That’s not justice.” Xanthos objects

“No, but unless you want to end up like Palmere, I suggest you find a constable quickly and get to passing along this info.” Haimish answers

“You make it sound as if I have no say in how this information is to be used, I think we could get the assassin’s guild to turn on Burghondy and kill him for us.” Xanthos speculates

“Would you rather have this metal in the hands of assassins?” Haimish asks

“At this point I don’t see a difference, a ruthless overlord or a heartless organization, either is bad in my book.” Xanthos answers

“Doopa thinks books are bad too, Doopa not learn anything from book that man selling book couldn’t tell Doopa when Doopa grabbed man by throat.” The ogre smiles

“Extortions and intimidation are not the way things get done in a civilized land.” Turgar huffs

“Doopa not know what ex-tortoise shins have to do with Gnashdrool son’s speech but Doopa likes intimidation. Two thumbs up worth.” Doopa agrees

“The assassins are killers, the Overlord is containable and plus travel options are limited, the doppelgangers could go anywhere. Plus who would you rather have as a buddy, the assassin’s guild or the ruler of the city?” Haimish counters

Xanthos mulls it over and decides he would do as Haimish has suggested and give this information to the Overlord, he leaves alone to find a constable amid requests to the contrary from Kessen and Turgar.

Menthos is called to meet with Statinisor regarding the job the party did below the temple.

“Please sit down, Helle informed me you were able to retrieve some members of each priest unit that was lost below in the catacombs. Excellent work, as a reward I offer you this Fire Ruby, please do be careful not to drop it in a place you hold dear. It tends to have an explosive nature about it.” The head Kador states

Menthos accepts the ruby and notes it is hot to the touch and places in an insulated pouch on his belt.

“Helle has also told me of your shifter’s troubles with the assassin’s guild. We could help you out with that, and even get you out of the city while we worked on that. Does this seem like a solution you might explore?” Statinisor asks

“I think so; I could use some fresh faces and cleaner air.” Menthos advises

“Excellent, the temple has recently acquired a crumbling border fortress on the southern edge of the Majestics. We’ve instilled a quickly rising warrior within the temple to serve as overseer of the rebuilding project. Recently the keep has been beset with bands of scavenging goblins. This has caused half of the work force to muster into a defensive unit. We’d like for you to help rid the surrounding land of the goblins so that the keep can focus on rebuilding rather than repelling.” The high priest relates

“Goblins you say? That’s more my speed. Where exactly is this keep?” Menthos inquires

“About three days travel north from Bulwark, Kindoras Keep was raised by Highcastle eighty years ago to assist the small towns of the northern plains in defense against raiding barbarians. After the barbarians were defeated by a gaggle of squirrels, chipmunks, and mice with their forest preserve leaders, their threat greatly diminished and the keep fell out of repair. We acquired the property from the Overlord and here we are.” Statinisor answers

“Sounds like a good deal, I’m up for it.” Menthos accepts

“Excellent, we will let Alenia know that you are coming and to prepare your room.” Statinisor states

“What about the rest of my guys?” Menthos asks

“What about them? They seem to lack a fire you possess; they can pitch a tent like the rest of the defenders do. You however get four walls and a leak proof roof, as well as a bed. Free accommodations for as long as your stay warrants, hopefully you’ll be able to stay through the completion of our new defensive weapon we are going to field test at Kindoras? It will be especially handy against those beings that prefer a colder environment.” The high priest responds

“Frost giants? You didn’t say anything about frost giants. Suddenly this sounds like a bait and switch tactic here and a pretty lame one at that, almost as if you were a used cart salesman. In fact my brother mentioned somebody with your description selling him a lousy cart that broke down after two city blocks, that wouldn’t be you would it?” Menthos asks

“Your paranoia knows no bounds, there hasn’t been a frost giant sighting south of Omen in centuries. I see no need for that trend to discontinue.” Statinisor replies

“Then why the need to field test this new weapon array?” Menthos inquires

“You seem to have the ability to ask the right questions little one don’t you? I have another gift I’d like to impart upon you, I think you’ll it’s utilitarian nature useful in many ways.” Statinisor offers

“I already posses the gifts of gab and a great physique, not to mention I drive the ladies wild. I don’t need think I could stand another boon, it might make me irresistible.” Menthos answers sarcastically

“Oh I’m sure of that; here take hold of my mantle. The destination we are traveling to would take months on foot.” Statinisor replies

Skeptic but nonetheless intrigued, Menthos takes hold of Statinisor’s robe and watches the smile brighten on Helle’s face just as the room gains an airiness quality and then without moving themselves, Menthos and Statinisor “fly” through the room then the temple, then the city flies past them, soon Menthos watches as the land south of Highcastle whizzes past. Strange foreign lands come and go; even an expansive jungle passes them by until, minutes later they stop in the middle of a dark cave. 

“Kind of spooky in here.” Menthos’ voice echoes through the chamber

“Soon you will here the voice of my deity, stand strong against the words and listen to the enunciation, for there is power in the words.” Statinisor states

“What kind of quackery is this? I’m no god fearing man.” Menthos objects, but soon realizes that Statinisor has abandoned him here alone.

“Hey!, Hello? Anybody in here?” This time however no echo is heard from Menthos’ words

Silence prevails as sweat begins to bead upon the teifling’s brow. Then a cascade of vulgarity and vileness assails Menthos’ ears, he clamps his hands over his ears but to no effect. The sounds tear through his flesh defense as if he had no hands with which to hold to his ears. Panic erupted in Menthos’ mind as fear clawed it’s way across his brain to squeeze the very reasoning from it. Unable to resist the power of the words, Menthos through his will against the voice in an attempt to push them sounds from his mind. Slowly the stream of hellish insults reduced themselves to a mere trickle as Menthos was able to pluck out of the stream of vile four words in infernal that repeated themselves over and over again. Menthos soon found himself repeating the sounds, those sounds then became words, the words became power, the power became an understanding, and the understanding became a mastering. *

Hours passed and soon a haggard Menthos, bleeding from his ears and eyes stumbled out of a cave hundreds of miles south of Highcastle, collapsed into the waiting arms of Statinisor high priest of Kador. In the time it took for Statinisor to speak his _word of recall _ the two men were transported back to the Temple of Kador in Highcastle. Menthos tried to sleep soundly that night but his dreams were filled with visions of burning souls and flayed bodies of those that were not worthy enough to swim in the lake of fire. Usually these nightmares brought Menthos to a waking sweat filled with gasping breaths, tonight however they merely annoyed him as if he’d rather be dreaming of his fantasy harem, and he seemed to tolerate the fire dreams this time. Maybe they held less scare power over him he thought, whatever the case he relished not having to rouse himself from sleep for it.

That morning at breakfast, Turgar was the first to notice something different about the teifling. Nothing visually apparent, just the air about him seemed ancient, the dragon shaman made a mental note to try and determine what exactly Menthos was doing with the Kadors. 

Haimish too noticed it, when the warlock sat down to eat, Haimish made an observation that this person was trouble, which seemed odd as he’d known Menthos for weeks now and while he had gotten that impression before it had seemed to wane in the coming days as Menthos had gotten Haimish out of his stoning and had been able to provider the party with a free place to sleep and eat. This morning however the feeling was back again and no longer an impression but a certainty that this man was trouble waiting to happen. 

“I’m headed north soon, I accepted a job for the temple to help them deal with some goblins that are harassing a keep they have. If any of you want to come along and play with some inferior creatures, I certainly wouldn’t fault you for coming along.” Menthos announces as he tears into a chunk of grapefruit.

“Goblins? Doopa will bring roasting sticks and basting sauce!” The ogre excitedly announces

“Totally uncouth, why on earth would you eat one? You live with them.” Turgar inquires

“Why you think that is? Less energy spent chasing small goblin mean more energy spent eating.” So speaks the wise Doopa

Turgar realized that while Doopa may not be the sharpest vorpal blade in the bunch, but his limited weapons could get the job done. He would not be taking Doopa lightly anymore, too many times his understanding of a given situation outshine his dimwittedness. 

“I could use some easy hunting, I’ll go north with you.” Haimish announced

Turgar accepted as well, more out of not wanting Doopa to get any glory than for a desire to travel with the warlock any further. 

Kessen decided he would wait on Xanthos, he wasn’t going anywhere with these people unless he could count a friend among the ranks.




*Menthos now has use of Dark Speech from the BoVD


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Menthos now has use of Dark Speech from the BoVD




S-W-E-E-E-T!

I don't have my BoVD in front of me, but I wonder: does that require an Evil alignment?

Menthos could certainly have been Evil from the beginning, but an alignement shift would explain Haimish's uncomfortableness around the tiefling.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> S-W-E-E-E-T!
> 
> I don't have my BoVD in front of me, but I wonder: does that require an Evil alignment?
> 
> Menthos could certainly have been Evil from the beginning, but an alignement shift would explain Haimish's uncomfortableness around the tiefling.




He wasn't evil when he received this "boon", this is another tempting for Asmodeus (who is the real power behind Kador if you have the BotR), the last session we had, Menthos used this ability twice in the same battle. Losing 7 CHA in the process, I think he's used it 5 times total and it tends to work too well.


----------



## spacehulkster

"I think he's used it 5 times total and it tends to work too well"

But it's usually only on a last resort or dire need basis.  
Which, I must admit, is getting quite too frequent of late.

I can't wait to see you face HM, when I unleash my ultimate last resort!


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

spacehulkster said:
			
		

> "I think he's used it 5 times total and it tends to work too well"
> 
> But it's usually only on a last resort or dire need basis.
> Which, I must admit, is getting quite too frequent of late.
> 
> I can't wait to see you face HM, when I unleash my ultimate last resort!




Come to the dark side, I have cookies!   

Now you realize the only reason you had to use it twice last battle was due to overzealousness of some PCs (not Menthos of course, if you can't be an athlete, be an athletic supporter)


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> He wasn't evil when he received this "boon", this is another tempting for Asmodeus (who is the real power behind Kador if you have the BotR),




Gotcha. Your phrasing of that statement makes me wonder if he's currently non-evil in your game. I guess I'll just have to wait and see.



> the last session we had, Menthos used this ability twice in the same battle. Losing 7 CHA in the process, I think he's used it 5 times total and it tends to work too well.




So he's "overclocking" magic, eh? Either that or using the Dread power  - which really doesn't seem all that useful unless you're fighting a lot of lower powered enemies. Now that I think about it they were talking about goblins, so maybe...

Taking a Charisma hit is pretty tough for a warlock, so I _hope_ it would work well. Unless you use it and your own party's int he AoE...


----------



## Jon Potter

spacehulkster said:
			
		

> I can't wait to see you face HM, when I unleash my ultimate last resort!




Now those kinda statements make me a little nervous.

But in a good way.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Say no to drugs*

As most of the party readied their backpacks and supplies for an extended hike up to the Majestics, Kessen waited on the steps of the Temple of Kador hoping to spot a returning Xanthos and as the day waned and nightfall crept across the city, Kessen got his wish.

Xanthos staggers inside the temple asking for a drink of water and a meal of fresh vegetables. Kessens assists him inside and seats him at the table as he calls for the rest of the party to join them.

“At first the Overlord threw me in jail, but I guess he was paranoid enough to look into the matter as he released me two days later telling me that Lord Burghondy would not longer be a threat to Highcastle. He gave me a writ of passage and planted a Blue Oak in his courtyard as requested by me as thanks for my loyalty to the crown.” Xanthos puffed out his chest

“Why a tree? Why not something useful, like a beer garden?” Menthos inquires

“Blue Oaks require lots of tending, he’ll likely have to bring in druids to make it grow, and if he does it’ll eventually grow to near two hundred feet in height and a width of one-hundred fifty feet. Ha!” Xanthos laughs

“Doopa, not find that funny. Bottom of big trees makes good toilet.” The ogre offered

“No wonder no foliage grows on the eastern side of the Cloudwalls, I thought the land was cursed, apparently it’s buried under feet of fertilizer.” Turgar states

“It keeps out your tribe.” Doopa retorted

The party explains their next move to Xanthos who agrees a more wide open space would do his health good, he lobbies for a more scenic route that takes them west to Bulwark first before heading north to Kindoras Keep. This way the party can avoid the Howling Hills and the werewolves, worgs, and dire wolves that predicate that area.

Once they are in agreement, they head out that morning with Kessen and Xanthos leading they reach the Silver Valley before nightfall and stay the night with Xanthos’ clan. Xanthos enlists Haimish to tell stories of civilization to the eager centaurs as Doopa and Turgar gets suspicious eyes and wary looks.

Morning comes and the group heads off for Bulwark, as they near Bulwark small tobacco farms spring up around the landscape along with vegetable farms. The smell of cooking tubers and pies fill the air. Xanthos explains that Bulwark is nearly all halfling now; they sell their tobacco to Highcastle as apparently it has the richest flavor. 

Once in the village, Menthos heads off to find a local tobacco shop while the rest of the party are invited as guest of the mayor for a feast at his residence that night. 

The small bell on the door jingles as Menthos stoops over to enter the small building. The smell of drying tobacco and other herbs fill his nostrils as Menthos begins browsing the hanging wares of the store.

“Welcome ‘O traveler, ‘Ave ye ‘eard of me store and ye’ve come to see wat all the talk was about?” A middle aged halfling puffs out between hits on his wood pipe

“I know you sell tobacco, I’m looking for something more in the way of knocking me unconscious with a good night’s sleep.” Menthos answered

“I ‘Ave just the ting!” The portly man ambles up a ladder behind the counter and retrieves a burlap sack of rustling leaves and twigs, “tis ‘ere is me specialty, I grow it only wen da nigtesade is its most deadly. It gives da stuff a good kick in the lungs it does.” The halfling advises

“Super, I’ll take the whole bag.” Menthos states

“Wa? Da wole ting? I-I-I don’t know wat to c’arge ye. I don’t tink I can sell da wole ting.” The halfling answers

Menthos dumps out a thousand pieces of gold onto the halfling’s counter.

“Sold!” The Halfling shouts

“Okay, now give me twenty pounds of the stuff you sell to Highcastle, along with enough papers to smoke it all.” Menthos replies

“O’ me stars and roots, I’ll ‘ave to close early tis year, and tats a good ting!” The Halfling beams as he readies Menthos’ purchase

“I’m heading up to Kindoras Keep tomorrow, I’d like to start selling your tobacco up there as the keep grows in size I’m thinking the multitudes of guards are going to need something to spend their wages on, catch my drift shorty.” Menthos relates

“You want me to supply you wit me tobacco to sell up tere? Wat split we talking about ‘ere devil?” The halfling shot back

“Fifty fifty, I do the leg work and you grow the stuff, I’ll sell the product and you move it up to me, deal hammy?” Menthos offered

“Tis could work, you prove to me your selling tecnique and I’ll consider it.” The halfling stated

“Sure thing, watch me sell it to that uppity woodsman over there.” Menthos said as he pointed out Kessen to the halfling through a side window

The two men shook on it and Menthos left to intercept Kessen as he headed for the mayor’s residence.

*whistles* “Hey Kessen, wait up I got something you’ve got to try.” Menthos shouted

“I don’t what nothing from you, we’ve been invited to the mayor’s house for dinner, you would’ve been too had you not run off to sodomize small woodland creatures.” Kessen laughs off Menthos

“I’m serious here, I’m trying to set up a trading venture with a shopkeeper here, but I need someone to test the product for me. My teifling senses are dulled to the taste of smoke and I need someone to tell me if this stuff is as good as he claims it is or if he’s trying to sell me leftover manure.” Menthos pleads

Kessen mulls it over for a bit, could the teifling be going legit, has getting him away from the Kadors helped his outlook on life? Kessen decided to accept Menthos’ bluff and try the tobacco.

Menthos excitedly set the burlap bag down and rolled Kessen a cigar, pulling out a tinder box, Menthos lit the rolled herbs on fire and marveled at the blue tinged smoke that last rose in the air in front of Kessen.

Kessen thanked the warlock and inhaled deeply on the cigar, coughing out the good air in his lungs and almost dropping the cigar in the process.

“Good?” Menthos asked

“Not bad, let me mull this over for you, I’ll let you know at dinner.” Kessen answered

Menthos agreed and began to count the gold in his head as he strode into the mayor’s house and sat down at Kessen’s place for dinner.

“Where’d you come from and where’s Kessen?” Xanthos demanded

“Relax goat boy, Kessen wasn’t feeling well and told me where dinner was and to go in his place. He said he’ll see us in the morning. I think he got a hold of some bad tea leaves.” Menthos advises

“Bad tea leaves? Did he buy them here?” A shocked mayor spoke up

“No sir, had them from Highcastle, I think they got a little wet in the sewer and got moldy. Nothing to worry about, let’s eat!” Menthos assured the mayor

Dinner was filling and the mayor invited the party to stay the night to which they agreed and all slept soundly. That morning as the rooster announced the sunrise, an incensed mayor bounded up his stairs shouting at the party to get up.

“What’s wrong?” Xanthos inquired

“That man, on my lawn. Remove him at once or I shall have him arrested!” The mayor shouted

Xanthos hurried to his window and peered down at a naked Kessen passed out, spread eagle, and laying face up at the sky.

“Get him up and dressed before he’s seen!” The mayor shouted

The party raced downstairs to gape in horror as a crowd had already gathered to watch Kessen water the mayor’s lawn from a prone position 

The mayor screamed and howled as Xanthos and Turgar hefted the unconscious Kessen up and onto the back of Xanthos who rode out of town. Haimish bent down to collect Kessen’s clothing when a foul stench assailed his nose, “Doopa? Can you come here?” Haimish asked

The bard handed Kessen’s soiled clothing over to the ogre who placed them in a pouch around his waist. Menthos waited until everyone was preoccupied with the mayor’s lawn and then scurried off to see the shopkeeper and seal the deal.

Forming their own small angry mob, the party exits Bulwark as a profusely apologetic Kessen tries to excuse his behavior. Having forgotten how he ended up in front of the mayor’s house in the first place let alone naked. 

“I guess you really were sick last night. I think you should avoid Halflings from now on, maybe you have an allergy, here have a cigar from me.” Menthos offered

“Thanks, don’t mind if I do.” Kessen answered as Menthos lit it and passed it over to the scout.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> "Here have a cigar from me.” Menthos offered
> 
> “Thanks, don’t mind if I do.” Kessen answered as Menthos lit it and passed it over to the scout.




 


That is hilarious!


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Who made who?*

The trip north to Kindoras Keep was uneventful, save for Kessen urinating all over himself and falling off his horse dazed and confused. This added an extra day onto the travel time; Xanthos was pleased at that outcome but was less favorable to Menthos claiming his cigar had nothing to do with Kessen’s actions. To prove himself right, Menthos gave a cigar to Doopa who smoked down gleefully within minutes, his hardier constitution able to easily withstand the pungent herbs incased therein. Haimish offered to try one as well, but Menthos balked at that idea, claiming to need something to sell the poor keep guards once they reached their destination.

On the fifth day just after the sun had reached zenith, the keep’s form emerge from behind a hill, Xanthos quickly noted with his eagle-like eyes, that the northern wall that faced the Majestics was still sporting an open wound. 

“No wonder they need help, that hole’s so wide a purple worm could slither in and not scratch it’s side.” Xanthos remarked

Kessen noted that the keep really did stand at the base of the Majestics, the mountains were visible three days ago and Kessen kept thinking they must be off course as he saw no signs of civilization such as smoke or a scouting party as this keep claimed to have.

“Looks like a giant’s outhouse with no roof.” Kessen opined 

Menthos however strode confidently over the broken ground and brambles that marred the hilly terrain, the rest of the party followed and soon they were dancing around fresh vegetables and damp irrigation ditches, although no sign of anyone that was tending the fields.

One hundred yards out, they heard someone on the battlements yell out their approach.

“Well, at least someone’s home, I thought they had abandoned the property.” Turgar offered

The sturdy wooden doors of the keep’s entrance slowly creaked open, Xanthos noted the doors were a recent addition as the wood had yet to be weathered and he could still smell the pine scent from the wood.

The party’s progress was halted by a gruff looking northerner, chiseled from years on the frontier; he weathered reddened cheeks showed above a full beard that hadn’t seen a straight hair in twenty years. The man’s eyes were ice blue and his scarred fingers gripped the pommel of his greatsword with a determination that comes from facing death several times and realizing that it’ll come for you when it’s ready, not when you think it should. His field plate armor had seen better years, Doopa though the contraction laughable an infestation of fleas was likely to cause the whole thing to collapse on the man.

“I am Gorn, captain of the guard and purveyor of the peace for this keep, state your business and be done with it, or kindly get your carcasses out of my keep.” Garn demanded

Before Menthos could speak up, a slender hand snaked it’s way over Gorn’s left shoulder and draw his arm back so the figure behind him could step around and in front of Gorn.

“Calm down Gorn, you can’t go scaring every living thing that wanders in here hoping to validate your own position.” Spoke a dark haired woman of barely twenty years, her face was angular than a normal humans and Xanthos guessed she had some elven blood in her from somewhere. Her eyes were dark and heavy, making her stare weigh on a person’s soul as her gaze passed over them. Her simple blouse and trouser attire concealed the elven thin blade at her side perfectly, and for all the mud that was prevalent within the keep, her boots looked like she had put them on and teleported to this very spot.

“I am Aleena, Priest initiate of the second fire of Kador.” She paused briefly as she took in the sight of the party, “and you must be the travelers Statinisor spoke of. We are happy to have you assist us.” She smiled and bowed 

“Yes, where should I start? I did not notice anyone in the fields, am I to presume it is you that I am here for?” Menthos asked

“Were you not sent by Statinisor? Your descriptions match perfectly.” Aleena inquired

“No we were, well actually I was, the rest of these louts are my personal retinue. Shall we commence with the duty or does your kind need to freshen up further?” Menthos stated puffing out his chest and speaking with a breathy tone to his voice.

“What do you mean?” Aleena asked

“The breeding program, Statinisor sent me to help in the defense of this keep, I figure we’re going to need more than just the six of us to do it, so we should get started soon.” Menthos answered

“But, I” Aleena started

“Shh.” Menthos said putting his right index finger over Aleena’s lips, “don’t talk I understand your nervousness, it’s not everyday that a man of my proficiency arrives with a plan to help you build up your defenses.”

“Oh really?” Aleena asks, Menthos nods and the priestess knees the teifling in the crotch.

“Now then, Gorn will give you any information you require about the building’s specifics and current roster of guards. Be advised though we only have what we were sent with.” Aleena advises, having to raise her voice over the incessant moaning of the downed Menthos

“Captain, please see to these men’s needs.” Aleena states pointing out the rest of the party, “leave this one to come crawling for forgiveness in my quarters.” Aleena turns and strides through the muck as if she was barely touching the ground.

“Follow me then.” Gorn orders and leads the rest of the party away from the entrance gate and into the center of the keep. Kessen makes sure to “accidentally” kick mud into Menthos’ open mouth stopping the high pitched whining for a brief moment.

Gorn explains that for the past three months the keep’s been harassed by various goblin and kobold groups, initially Gorn thought them to be a local annoyance as all they would do was get close enough to hit the keep with their slingshots and once we returned fire they would scamper off. The keep’s been able to kill about a two dozen or so and the goblin haven’t killed anyone much less hurt anybody with their pebbles. He began sending out a patrol as the attacks were getting so frequent that the keep was spending most of their day shielding themselves against the rock shower than they were rebuilding the keep or tending to the fields. 

Then a sinister thought entered Gorn’s head one day, he noted a method to the goblin’s attacks. One group would draw the patrol further and further away from the keep while another sat and watched the keep from afar. This convinced Gorn that something else was behind these attacks as goblins aren’t’ too bright in the strategy field. Gorn started reeling in the patrols to not go after the fleeing group but to go after the waiting group. This incensed the goblins and they’ve begun using coordinated attacks on the keep, even attacking under a cloudy sky during the day. These renewed attacks are what keeps the farmers from tending the fields and keeps our livestock grazing far to the northwest. 

Gorn takes them to the wounded wall and points out the keep’s efforts to have it repaired, “we have a supply caravan coming over from Omen in about four days, laden with quarry stone and some additional masons to help us out.”

Menthos begins his muddy crawl to the far left corner of the keep, where permanent housing has been erected, slowly at first and then up to hands on his knees as he trudges along to finally upright and proud of himself for not vomiting along the way as he opens the door to the partially completed tower. 

Menthos waits as his eyes adjust to the dimmer light and he notes the light footprints of a set of small boots heading off to the left, following those his arrives at a closed thick wooden door. Menthos debates whether he should kick the door down and barge in to demand an apology, or whether a knock and polite response would be more appropriate. In the end he decides both are acceptable and lightly raps on the door. He hears the footsteps of someone as they approach and unbolt the door on the inside. Menthos watches as the door begins to open and once the smallest sliver of the room beyond can be seen beyond the door jam,  Menthos kicks the door attempting to have the door fling into the face of the person opening it.

However he was never a good dungeoneering study and failed to notice the door was reinforced with iron and only managed to stub his toe and sprain his ankle by kicking the door, and to top of the humiliation the door failed to budge from his kick.

Aleena finished opening the door the rest of the way, dressed now in a gown of faux fire, the bottom was a pale blue color, followed on top of that by an orange color which covered most of her torso, the top part of the gown was yellow around the shoulders and neckline.

“If I am to believe that Statinisor sent you to me to have me baby-sit a perpetually foul up such as you, then I have no recourse but to train you to become effective fodder for the campaign.

Menthos brushed off the insult and instead rolled back onto his elbows and propped himself up to look up at Aleena.

“I know you find me irresistible, there’s a reason I carry a ten foot pole, it’s for clearance.” Menthos speaks

Incensed at the teifling’s disrespectful tone, Aleena draws her elven thin blade and points it at the neck of Menthos, “the next time you tongue fails to address me properly, I shall have it cut out and animated onto your shoulder where it will insult you with your own words for all eternity.”

“You know, I like hearing myself talk as much as the next person, but I don’t think I you could get used to taste.” Menthos answered

Aleena brought her blade down and Menthos rolled away, then leaped up and activated his spider climb ability to prop himself up onto Aleena’s door. Aleena spun around following the warlock’s move, locating Menthos stuck to the front of her door, Aleena looked up and stared into Menthos’ outstretched fist where a small ring was located. With the twitch of a finger muscle, Menthos activated the magical ring and a shower of glittering lights fell in front of Aleena’s eyes.

The rogue blood in Menthos seized the opening and fired an eldritch blast into the flat-footed priestess’ face. Aleena screaming in pain and she tried to clear her vision of the glittering motes in front of her. Menthos used this moment to spider climb up the door and onto the ceiling of the hallway just above the flailing Aleena, timing his move, Menthos waited until the motes were beginning to clear and Aleena let her guard down to wipe her eyes. Then he let go of the ceiling and fell upon her.

The stunned priestess dropped her blade and had the wind knocked out of her as her body slammed into the floor of the hallway. Menthos quickly wrapped her arms up behind her with his left hand. With his right hand he pushed away the dark hair of Aleena that had fallen over her right ear, Menthos put his mouth in close to her ear and whispered, “I think we both know who Statinisor wants to train who, and the next time you think about getting feisty, make sure you drop by my room, preferably nude.”

Menthos retreated and let the pride injured Aleena collect herself before returning her blade to her, she snapped it out of his hand and placed it back in it’s scabbard, spun on her hells and quickly re-entered her room and slammed the door behind her.

“Your welcome!” Menthos shouted as he went to clean himself up and find some suckers to sell tobacco to.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Scout =/= tracker*

The party meets with the returning group of scouts, learning about numbers and overall strength of the goblins they’ve encountered. 

“Their aim’s getting better though, I got hit in the breastplate yesterday and someone else got hit in the leg last week. Still haven’t killed anyone though.” Reports a guard

“That’s troubling, they turn into crack shots just as we arrive, how convenient.” Turgar laments

“Quit being paranoid, they’re stupid little snots. One cough from you later and they’ll be running for their lives, so calm down. Here have a cigar.” Menthos advises

“I am concerned that these goblins only crime seems to be that they are annoying, I don’t think they’ve done anything to warrant their extermination.” Xanthos replies

“What? Kador sent us a pacifist? Look buddy, I don’t know what tree you un-hugged yourself from, but around here goblins are disease carrying filthy thieves that would love nothing more than to rid themselves of us. So, unless your plan is to stand idly by why they slaughter your friends when you inactivity gives them the chance, then I suggest you strike first, strike hard, and strike down the pukes.” A guard admonishes the shifter

“Maybe you’re the ones who aren’t supposed to be here, I don’t recall you spontaneously generating in this spot. The goblins have more right to this land than you do.” Xanthos defends his beliefs

“We work the ground, grow our crops, and protect the caravans as they head out into the plains. The goblins hide out in caves, strike from the dark and obliterate all forms of lesser life they come in contact with. I’d liken them to a vampire than a meek little mouse you would have them be.” The guard presses on

“Just because you can’t reason with it, doesn’t mean you need to kill it. Humans breed like fleas and suck the life out of the forests just the same; perhaps becoming the hunted would put the shoe on the other foot for you.” Xanthos responds

“Don’t try any of your woodsy mumbo jumbo on us; we’re not some illiterate hicks you can use inflection and innuendo on to get away with not meaning anything. I’ll be real plain and simple for you, if I see one of those goblins; I’ll kill it even if I have to go through your stubborn ass to do it.” The guard finishes

“That sounded threatening; perhaps I should lead a frost worm to your north wall and watch as it slides right in to the heart of the matter?” Xanthos replies

“Fight!” Menthos yells

“Alright you two, quit trying to see who’s got the bigger package and get back to the job at hand.” Kessen advises

The six guards back down after realizing this quarry would fight back a lot harder than six goblins. Xanthos however still fumed at the guard’s words.

“If that is your line of defense, then this keep will surely perish. I weep for the loss of life that will come.” Xanthos says to Menthos and heads off to cool down

“What did I say?” Menthos asks incredulously

“How about fight?” Turgar answers

“Well, without my encouragement Kessen would’ve never spoken up, they looked like two blind bullywugs in a tongue slapping contest.” Menthos replies

“They have those?” Haimish inquires

“Of course not, he’s blowing smoke up your rear again, that’s what he does, that’s all he does.” Kessen answers

“My good man, would it not be prudent to affix your gaze upon the horizon of your future rather than to assail yourself with the unfortunate task of trying to dissuade me from pursuing my respective career path which you have so eloquently pointed out lacks a basic fundamental that you seems to posses in abundance?” Menthos answers  

“Crap.” Haimish spits

“What was that? You sound like him only it made sort of sense, at least it wasn’t a metaphor.” Kessen reply trailed off and got quieter at the end after he realized his reply was bolstering Menthos’ argument

“Doopa say we go find some goblins, squish them, then come back and eat lots.” The ogre offered

The party agreed and went to collect Xanthos for their journey.

“Come with us, maybe you can try some diplomacy on them?” Turgar stated

“I don’t think that would result in any breakthroughs.” Xanthos replied

“Well, when they attack you your ethics will enable you to fight back and kill them for us.” Menthos advised which provide to be the obviousness that Xanthos was overlooking.

The party headed out towards the east first and into a rockier terrain as opposed to a rolling hill terrain that dominated south of the Majestics where Kindoras was situated. The party scouted all afternoon until:

“Hey Kessen, we’ve found nothing out here, why don’t you put you vocation to good use and scare us up a set of goblin tracks?” Menthos asked

“I don’t know what goblin tracks look like.” Kessen dismissed the warlock

“What? You’ve never seen a goblin track? Didn’t you come from the Plain of Cairns?” Menthos inquired

“Yes, but that hardly means I’ve seen a goblin track enough times to know what it was and how to track it.” Kessen replied irritated at the request

“Here, I’ll show you.” Xanthos said and transforms into a goblin and walks around the area for awhile, “can you follow some tracks now?” 

“Sure.” The scout replies and takes a hard look at the ground and heads off in a northwesterly direction 

After three more hours of what Menthos gets annoyed, “What are you doing? 

“Following goblin tracks.” Kessen answers

“To me it looks like you’re aimlessly wondering with a purpose to waste our time.” Menthos answers

“Oh yeah? Let’s see you try and track then. I’m the scout here!” Kessen replies

“You’re right, you’re the scout, but even I can tell they didn’t go any further north.” Menthos answers

“Prove it!” Kessen demands

“How do you know that Menthos?” Xanthos asks

“There’s snow on the ground, and thirty feet ahead of you is a mile wide fissure with ice covering it.” Menthos answered

Both Doopa and Turgar looked ahead and concurred with the warlock’s assessment

Embarrassed, Kessen admits to not knowing how to track.

“How can you possibly scout if you don’t know what’s ahead of you?” Haimish asks

“I never needed it, I was always one to lie in wait and ambush people, not go find them to ambush.” Kessen replies

“Great, can anybody track?” Xanthos asks

“What? You’re the nature lover can’t you track?” Kessen asks

“No, when you have the nose of a wolf or a fox, looking for tracks becomes less important.” Xanthos answers

“What about the ogres then?” Kessen inquires 

“I’m a dragon shaman, I track dragons.” Turgar replies

“How do you do that? They fly? Do they leave a vapor trail?” Kessen pushes the blame and embarrassment from himself

“How hard can that be? Look for the scorched earth and burned villages, an ooze could track a dragon.” Menthos answers

“It’s not as simple as that, there’s knowing which way they turn after a strafing to knowing which direction they strafe in.” Turgar answers

“Doopa, track food to mouth with eyes.” The ogre announces

“Gee that sound complicated, how many years did it take you to learn that trick?” Kessen asks

“Doopa practices at every meal.” The ogre says proudly

Menthos studies the sky while the rest of the party devolves into a shouting match, finding what he sought he heads southwest.

“Where are you going?” Haimish inquires

“To Kindoras Keep.” Menthos answers

“Bull, you don’t know where we are.” Kessen disputes the warlock

“Well, you see I saw that column of smoke rising in the west, and knowing the breeze is currently heading in a northerly direction up the southern slopes, I’m aiming for just south of where the smoke rises. It’s like I’m tracking the smoke, stick around maybe you’ll learn something.” Menthos admonishes the scout

The party rejoices as Menthos leads them back to the keep, although Doopa was saddened that no goblins were found, he was picked up by the smells of cooking pig.

“I figured you for dead; glad to see you lived long enough to eat dinner.” Gorn says gruffly before gnawing into a burnt ham.

The party ate up and decided to try a different tack in the morning.

Morning came and the party headed northeast from the keep this time. Keeping the Majestics to their right at all times, they decide to travel six hours following the tactic then turn around and head home the reverse direction. Fours hours into their trek the weather turned colder, and the wind changed from a eastern breeze warm off the plains to a northern gale down the Majestic’s slopes.

“This is an odd weather pattern for late summer.” Xanthos remarked 

“Going to be early winter.” Doopa said sniffing the air

Another hour had Xanthos uncovering a viciously dismembered and partially eaten bullette.

“Whoa, that’s a big one.” Turgar announces

“Something huge tore into this.” Xanthos says as he sniffs the area and surveys the ground around the kill, “more like some things huge.” Xanthos announces pointing at the huge claw-like foot prints heading east towards the mountains.

“What do you think they are?” Haimish inquires

“I don’t know their feet are a cross between a troll and a hill giant, only much larger obviously.” Xanthos relates

“Finally something Doopa can smash!” The ogre shouts

“I guess we should check it out, the keep might need to know what’s out here.” Menthos argues

“Prudent I suppose, lets follow the tracks and see if we can’t sneak up on them.” Xanthos advises to the agreement of the group

Xanthos tracks the creatures into a sheer slope and spies the three huge purple giants turning around and heading back towards the party, he announces that he’ll go out about a hundred feet and transform into a large moose to lure the creatures out and once they try to engage him, he’ll fly back to the party and have them follow him into the party’s trap. 

The plan is agreed upon, and Xanthos heads out as a moose, trying to moan as if injured. The commotion alerts the three beast and they approach steadily towards Xanthos, they pause about eighty feet from the moose and Xanthos is able to get a good look at them. He first hunch seems to be correct, the creatures are warty with greasy straight black hair and pointed noses like a troll, but they are built like a massive hill giant. Xanthos gets up to the eyes and notices a frightening conclusion as the giants reach into pouches at their sides and start chucking boulders at the “wounded” moose.

His plan unraveling, Xanthos decides to head back towards the party in the hopes that he’ll draw the giants out and cause them to switch tactics. Sensing something wrong, Kessen stands up from crouching beside a rock and starts firing at the creatures. 

“Come get some!” Kessen shouts

Xanthos not yet able to speak common in animal form yet can only bay at Kessen in a vain attempt to get him to stop firing and hide again.

Too late though as the giants cease firing and clasp hands, the middle giant creates a shimmering door in front of himself and walks through it pulling it’s two companions with it. In an instant the giants have _dimensioned doored _ into the midst of the party. Xanthos transforms into a lion and charges at the nearest creature, the giant raises his hand at the charging beast and Xanthos feels his life force drain away until he is left as what he was months ago, a naïve elf with limited shifting abilities.

“Uh oh, maybe this was not a good plan after all Xanthos?” Menthos shouts


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Track this!*

Turgar’s muscles, surprised by the materialized purple giant in front of him, were unable to put up an effective defense as the giant’s claws tore through the ogre like paper. The sickening sound of flesh ripping and then the bone cracking sound of a spine snapping, echoed through the lightly failing snow and against the mountains to the east. A red plume of blood erupted around the giant’s head and the smell of a fresh kill permeated the nostrils of the combatants.

Doopa shrugged off his surprise at the giant’s movement as the smell of warm blood filled his lungs, Doopa allowed the primitive rage all his kin held to take over and he flew into a corded mass of a howling tree swinging power ogre. Doopa set his sights on the giant that ripped Turgar apart and blinded charged the beast so fiercely that it appeared his was flying into the beast. The giant whirled on Doopa and connected with a backhand across the barbarian’s face which only served to make the ogre’s rage louder as Doopa wailed his tree trunk of a club across the arms and shoulders of the giant.

Haimish took up a new dwarven drinking song, penned by Billy Jowl, as he armed himself with his long sword and advanced towards the giant that teleported the rest of it’s friends:

_And we said we’d all go down together
Our spirits break? Never
I am the end of your fair weather
Your head from your neck I will sever
‘Cause we said we’d all go down together_

Inspired, Haimish slashed his blade across the calf of the giant, thick dark green blood oozed out of the wound.

Menthos launched an eldritch blast into the giant Doopa was making respect his authority. While Kessen maneuvered around Menthos and fired a shot into the back of the skull of the giant Doopa was engaged with. The Giant’s knees buckled and then it collapsed on all fours, Doopa then teed off on its head and was please with the high pitched snap its neck made just before it crumpled to the ground.

Doopa raised his arms in victory just as the remaining two giants brought the entire battlefield under total darkness. 

Xanthos watched helplessly as Turgar was ripped in half and the area went dark, at least the party had reduced the enemy numbers before that. Four against two was much better odds, even if one of those was a warlock of dubious ethics.

Haimish heard the giant’s heavy breathing and expect the attack, but was ill-prepared for the result. The giant’s claws seemed to rake through his armor as if it were made of tin. The filthy nails digging deep into Haimish’s chest, scooping buckets of blood as they dredged along. Haimish coughed up blood almost instantly as he fell backwards onto the frosted ground.

The dual sound of the blood cough and the thud traveled quickly to Xanthos who hurried through the darkness and reached Haimish’s side. He transformed into an elf and quickly administered healing to the downed bard, halting the bleeding and easing the laborious breathing.

Unable to see in the darkness, Kessen fired two shots near where he thought a giant should be and instead heard them sail on out to range after they failed to hit anything. The teifling, born with darkness in his veins already, saw perfectly through the giant’s rouse. Menthos aimed at the giant that had leveled Haimish, but then thought better of it, fearing an attack would draw undue attention to himself. Instead he backed away and hoped to give the impression that Kessen was the more dangerous foe.

Doopa, his ogre eyes used to the darkness of unlit caves, closed the distance to the uninjured giant and slammed his club into the left thigh of the creature while dodging it’s clawed swipe at Doopa’s head. Xanthos switched his tactics and decided to try and play distracter to the giant near him, to keep him away from a critical Haimish, the shifter darted out to the giant’s left and heckled the creature in giant and then troll.

Conscious but hurting, Haimish broke into a new song of encouraging aid:

_H-E-A-L
Buddy can you spare me an H-E-A-L
It’s time you gave me an H-E-A-L
I’ll take anything. Spell, potion or scroll
Just help me get back on a roll

That’s why I’m calling for an H-E-A-L 
It’s time to give me an H-E-A-L
I’m bleeding like a sieve 
Man, I just want to live
Don’t need your sword, club, or shiv_

“I feel oddly inspired to end your life!” Menthos shouts back at the bard

The giant’s roar and one of them chases Xanthos while the other grabs Doopa’s head with it’s clawed hand and drains the life energy right out of the barbarian. The sudden loss of his barbaric rage coupled with the damage already done to him, causes Doopa to keel over bleeding at wounds that were scratches before but were now inches deep.

Xanthos’ heart sank even with Haimish’s proud faltering voice; the party had lost both ogres and the only other person who could tell the sharp end of a sword from the pommel. Xanthos danced around the giant and raced to Doopa’s side, however his new un-experienced self was out of the only healing magic he had, so the shifter put some herbs to Doopa’s most grievous wounds and halted the bleeding, but the ogre would not regain consciousness until well after the battle would be decided.

“Kessen and Menthos, the battle needs to end quickly we’re down four, only you guys are well enough to fight!” Xanthos shouts

“Hey jack-ass, would it appease you if I just laid down and took my death like a man to get it over with quicker for you? What the heck do you think we’re doing out here? Pitching a tent?” Menthos shouts back and then blasts a giant with his eldritch power

“Don’t get pissed with him, why don’t you try melee instead of pea-shooting them from afar.” Kessen yells as Menthos

“Don’t make me come over there an tell you what I think of you to your face in a language that will make your colon reject you on principle and your spleen to forcibly expel itself from your body.” Menthos advises

“You sassing me? I can hit you all day from here moron!” Kessen shouts as he aims at the warlock only to wrench his bow back at the sound of a fast approaching giant, the scout launches his arrows into the darkness and connects with both shafts as the massive claw of the giant swishes past Kessen’s head, bring a deep sigh of relief to the scout.

Menthos backs out of the darkness and waits for the attack he knows is coming, as soon as the giant’s head peers out from the veil of darkness, Menthos activates is ring and a bedazzling light show erupts around the giant’s head. The large creature stands there slack jawed and inattentive as the opportunistic Menthos blasts the flat-footed giant up the nostril and into the frontal lobe of it’s brain. Death came quickly to it as Menthos hopped away from the falling body.

The darkness faltered with the death of the giant Menthos hit, and as the last remaining giant surveyed it’s surroundings it spied Haimish struggling to his feet and Xanthos on his feet brandishing a sword. Fearful for it’s life the giant dimension doored away to lick it’s wounds.

The threat abated, Haimish dropped to his knees and wheezed painfully. Xanthos and Kessen collected the separate parts of Turgar and were debating the merits of a burial here versus a burial closer to civilization, when Kessen realized Menthos was not around.

“Where’d that lousy warlock go?” Kessen inquired

“I don’t know.” Wheezed Haimish, “I stopped paying attention when I went back down to my knees.”

“Maybe he left us for dead, or more likely he’s out tracking for us.” Xanthos commented

“What was that for? Anybody could track in snow, it’s not like that’s hard.” Kessen replies

At that Menthos emerged from behind a good sized boulder and rejoined the party.

“Where did you go?” Kessen demands

“Calm down I was in another nation.” Menthos explains

“What’s that supposed to mean? Did you follow the giant and kill it?” Kessen asks incredulously

“Did the giant somehow manage to teleport you along with it? How’d you get back?” Xanthos inquires

Menthos just stood there with a stupefied look upon his face

“Well? What nation did you visit out here in the mountains?” Kessen asks

“You idiots, I was urinating. I was visiting the urination! Can’t a guy get some privacy?” Menthos responds

 “That’s it punk; you’ve raised my ire for the last time!” Kessen screams setting an arrow.

“Well, it’s nice to know I have that effect on you, but you’re not my type as you’ve failing to raise anything on me. I don’t think I could even work with the meager effect you’ve had on me.” Menthos responds

Kessen points the arrow at Menthos’ head, “say goodbye half-breed.” 

“Goodbye half-breed, I’ll be sitting in Kindoras Keep while you losers are out here following the tracker’s ass in circles.” Menthos said as he helped Haimish to his feet.

Kessen’s trigger finger hesitated as the warlock’s words were likely true, but that didn’t mean that the rest of the party needed to know that, “baloney, I can get us there just as quickly as you can, if not quicker.”

“Fine, I’ll take Doopa, Haimish, and both parts of Turgar back with me. You can lead the shifter back to the keep, and when it starts to get really cold out he can slice you open and use your insides as a blanket.” Menthos said

“Not only will we make it back before you, we’ll make it back days before you do.” Kessen challenges

“I think we should take the rest of the party while you go off alone, I don not want predators tracking the scent of blood from Turgar and finishing off Doopa and Haimish before they’re healed.” Xanthos countered

“Okay, but I have all the connections at the keep, restorations, resurrections, full heals, I could have everyone healed and scouting before you guys ever got the keep in sight.” Menthos proposed

Xanthos pondered this a moment, “Fine I will go with you to and assure that both you and the injured reach Kindoras safely and intact.” 

“What you’re siding with him? I can’t believe this! Fine I prove both of you wrong. See you chumps there next week!” Kessen yelled as he sprinted off to the south

Xanthos gave Menthos a wary look as he hefted Doopa over his shoulder

“What did I do? He’s the one who’s going to get lost.” Menthos states

“It better be.” Was all Xanthos replied

The day and a half trek back to Kindoras Keep was uneventful and not once did they see Kessen ahead of them at any point.

“Looks like you will lose the bet.” Xanthos says

“We didn’t bet, and I don’t lose. If he’s ahead of us he did a nice job of clearing out a path for us.” Menthos replied

Once they reached Kindoras Keep and made inquiries however, it was determined that Kessen had not made it back to Kindoras Keep yet.

“Looks like you lost your bet.” Menthos explained

“Maybe, but if you can’t get them healed then you’ll lose more than a bet.” Xanthos threatens

“Back off monkey, that chip on your shoulder smells like a bull chip. Let me go do my thing.” Menthos said and headed off to see Aleena


----------



## Jon Potter

Yikes! And my players think I'm rough!?!

What were those giants?


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Yikes! And my players think I'm rough!?!
> 
> What were those giants?




Dusk Giants from Heroes of Horror

OT - I just used an Urophion last night (Roper/Mind flayer creature from Lords of Madness), that was the first time I seriously thought I'd have a TPK on my hands. I'd extracted 2 brains and was going for a third. That thing is tough!


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Dusk Giants from Heroes of Horror
> 
> OT - I just used an Urophion last night (Roper/Mind flayer creature from Lords of Madness), that was the first time I seriously thought I'd have a TPK on my hands. I'd extracted 2 brains and was going for a third. That thing is tough!




No wonder I didn't recognize those guys. No HoH on my book shelf. No LoM, for that matter, but I look forward to reading about yours here.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Help!*

Menthos enters the Kador headquarters in the keep and makes his way to Aleena’s door, after several seconds of banging the wooden door with his fists; Aleena flings the door open with a rush of frustration.

“What!?” Aleena shouts, “Oh it’s you, go away I’m busy!” The priestess turns her wrist and shoves the door back to its frame.

Menthos however sidestepped the swinging door quickly and skips his way into her room.

“Don’t you listen! Get out or I’ll have you gutted for dinner to the dogs.” Aleena screams

“Calm down sister, my supporting cast is a little under the weather, they need some good touches with a healing hand before I can return to the business of saving your ass.” Menthos states

“Saving me? Your presumptuous attitude smacks of insolence. I razed this keep before your were even a desire in your father’s eye, don’t come into my keep and flout your personal crap like it was the most prized possession in all the land.” Aleena responds

“Hold on there wench, if there’s any flouting going on is coming from the front of your breastplate. Now are you going to dispense with the healing or do I need to get one of the sheep herders in here to milk it out of you?” Menthos replies

“How dare you insult me!” Aleena shouts and draws her mace while hoisting up her shield

Menthos quickly searches for a bluff to end this without him having to get physical again, his mind twists around a solitary thought.

“Hold up, why are you fighting me? We both know I wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t screwed up. They don’t send out non-pyromancers to take out the trash. Statinisor sent me to make sure he didn’t have to.” 

Those words seemed to reach Aleena on the level Menthos was shooting for. The priestess lowered her weapon and gave a defeated look into the teifling’s eyes.

“This keep was to be completed a month ago, the goblins keep stealing our supply wagons and killing the guards, I hoped I could kill them before Statinisor realized what was going on and dismiss the failures on the caravan’s guards and not my own. Yet, even now the next caravan is over a day late and I fear it too has succumbed to the goblin’s attacks.” Aleena explains

“Now see that wasn’t so hard, where was the caravan coming from?” Menthos asked relived his luck had won out again

“From Omen to the east, it should have been her yesterday morning. I can’t spare anyone to go look for it, not only are we short staffed, they would surely realize the goblin problem was not in my control and chaos would ensue.” Aleena answers

“So I’ll go look for it, maybe they got stuck somewhere and need a push?” Menthos replies, his tone of voice getting more soothing 

Aleena glared back at him as if her personal alarm had gone off.

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone, especially if you move your butt and get out there and fix my torch bearers.” Menthos ordered

Aleena moved passed Menthos and exited the room, the warlock followed her out into the courtyard and waited as she undid the energy draining the giants had delivered.

“What sort of goblin did that to you?” Gorn asked

“Wasn’t a goblin, some kind of purple troll/hill giant combination. My guess it was an elusive dusk giant, very rare and always the harbinger of bad tidings.” Xanthos explained

“Dusk giant huh? Sounds made up, like you guys wussed out against a bunch of no good thieving goblins is what it sounds like.” Gorn pressed

“Doopa will wuss out all over your internal organs, after nice lady fixes Doopa owee.” The barbarian threats

“Ha! That’ll be the day that some big smelly wannabe of a giant gets the drop on Gorn!” The captain counters

“Fifty gold on the human with the inferiority complex.” Turgar wagers  

Menthos leaves the squabbling behind as he saddles up a horse and heads for the Keep’s gate.

“Where you think you’re going?” Xanthos asks

“Hunt me down some goblins, you coming or are you going to stand there with that I’m primitive and don’t understand your advanced ways look?” Menthos calls back

“Shouldn’t we wait for Kessen?” Haimish asks

“Why? He just get us lost, that man couldn’t find his lips if they were bleeding after I smacked him.” Menthos answers

Xanthos and Doopa also saddle up, which encourages Haimish and Turgar to do the same.

“Make sure you don’t wuss out this time ladies, bring back a trophy and I’ll mount it for you.” Gorn calls out

“If I come back with a vrock can it mount you instead?” Menthos answers as Gorn throws rocks at the exiting party

“If we run into a vrock, we’re not going to be able to bring it back.” Haimish explains

“If we run into a vrock, bringing it back will be the least of our worries.” Menthos answers

The party heads out to the east, following Menthos who wanted to lead the group in the hopes he would run into the caravan by design rather than heading north where the party believed the goblins resided.

“Shouldn’t we be turning north by now, we’ve been going east all day?” Xanthos asked

“Why? That’s where the goblins expect us to go, so I’m going to go east and out flank them. You can go north and alert them to your presence if you wish.” Menthos answered

“You’re so full of crap, you’re creating a downwind breeze that’ll lead the goblins right to us anyway.” Xanthos answered

“At least it won’t be because we turned north and were ambushed.” Menthos answered

A few more hours of riding saw the party get more and more anxious, especially Doopa who was aching for a fight after having to leave Gorn back at the keep.

“Doopa wants goblins to smash now.” The ogre called out

“Shh, there’s a river up ahead, I want to cross that and then head north, goblins hate water it makes them clean.” Menthos answers

“False, where are you getting your goblin facts? It’s like it all made up and you’re just expending energy to talk.” Xanthos counters

“Look, a fire.” Haimish calls out

“Where?” Xanthos asks, clearly perturbed that he was occupied with Menthos rather than scouring the horizon for proof of Menthos outlandish claims.

“Looks like a wood fire, mixed with clothing.” Xanthos relays

“A wood fire? Really? I had no idea you could start a fire with wood, you people are advanced. Us backwards teiflings have to pray for lightening to start a fire.” Menthos answers

“How can you tell from here what the fire is made of?” Turgar asks impressed with Xanthos’ confidence

“It’s all in how the smoke rises and what color, it’s quite simple once you get the hang of it from seeing so many forest fires started by wayward teiflings praying for lightening.” Xanthos answers

“Maybe someone’s in distress, we should check it out nonetheless.” Haimish advises

“I was going to suggest that. Follow me!” Menthos announces as he rides his horse up and over a rock outcropping, as the unexpected drop in ground level was realized by the horse, it stiffened up on the landing and threw Menthos from the saddle. The rest of the party easily navigated the now obvious hazard.

The party approached the fire and heard several voices shouting back and forth, they sounded human as opposed to goblins. Xanthos transformed into a bird and alighted in a tree circling the clearing. A small ruined building housed the fire that the party spied, five wagons laden with stone blocks, and stone cutting tools were assembled in a ring around the small ruins. A group of fifteen men argued with each other inside the ring near the fire. Xanthos flapped his wings to take off when his noticed the trees across from his position shaking and moving out of the way as if something big moved towards the caravan. Xanthos took off and returned to the party to notify them of his findings.

“We must help them.” Haimish said and rode off towards the encampment

“For the glory!” Menthos shouted and slapped the back of Doopa’s horse which took off after Haimish’s horse with Doopa still in the saddle.

Menthos then rode on after the ogre as Xanthos and Turgar brought up the rear. The party raced to the caravan, their pounding hooves alerting the caravan to their presence long before the party could be seen. The men ceased their arguing and took up defensive positions within the ringed wagons.

“We come from Kindoras, we know you were bound for there. Let us help you!” Menthos shouts in starts as his horse provides a very bumpy ride into the camp.

“How do you know that! You must be a witch. Attack!” Came the cries from within the ruins

“Halt, I can calm your passion.” Haimish said as he whipped out his lute and began to strum a soothing tune

_I wanted to sing you a song
That I you help to sign along
I don’t know the words 
We’ll make it all up as we go
Who knows how long ‘til my friends will show
I’ve already forgotten what I was going to say
It looks like you’re not bringing some hay
I’m in a bind, I’m really stuck
No you’re wrong, I don’t suck
I’ve sung to beasts I sung to men
And all those words I’ve penned
I don’t know why the goblins have some
I do know that if you keep throwing rocks at me
I’ll come down there and rip your eyes out you ungrateful bunch of bums!_

“Catchy” Menthos says as he invades the small ruins and the caravan

“Get out monster, we’ll not go down like the rest of the caravans, you’re going to have to take us out with a fight!” One of the caravan guards state

“Well if it’s a fight you want, there they are.” Menthos says as he points out the tree line where a band of goblins riding worgs erupts from the woods. 

The party gleefully took to arms with an air of confidence that comes with years of slapping around goblins for fun, until their leader emerged from the thickets, a blue skinned ogre riding a smilodon. The big cat’s tusks glistened with saliva as it licked it’s chops at the smell of warm blood.

“Haimish, get the wagons up and moving, the rest of us will hold off the goblins!” Xanthos yelled out as he and Turgar advanced on the charging band of goblins.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*A destination is gained*

Haimish ignored the request from Xanthos and leapt from the top of the ruins onto the back of a mounted goblin, knocking the goblin from the worg and sending the worg skidding into the base of the ruins. Menthos wasted no time in eldritch blasting the prone goblin with a shot to its kidney’s, ending its life, he then clambered up a covered wagon to take a high ground defense and get a better lay of the battlefield.

Doopa immediately dismounted and slammed his club into the skull of a charging goblin, crushing it like paper; the worg however took a chunk of flesh off of Doopa’s thigh as it passed the ogre.

Turgar brought his horse around to the north of the ruins and brought up a defensive aura that would damage any enemy that dared strike him in combat. He then dismounted and waited like a spider for the flies to come. Xanthos transformed into a giant owl and harried goblin riders on the south side of the ruins. The caravan turned it’s attentions to the goblins and began slinging rocks at those that rode by. 

What started as a trickle of cavalry, turned into a torrent as two dozen more riders burst through the woods towards the camp. Doopa limped near Turgar and the two ogres fought off six mounted worgs trying to preoccupy as many riders as they could. Haimish was embattled near the western base of the ruins trying to fend off four worgs as their goblin riders dismounted and began to ascend the ruins to gain entry to the encamped caravan. 

The ogre mage watched and waited as his training told him this battle would end up like all the others, a victory for his side. Xanthos swooped down and picked off one rider at a time, carried them thirty feet up and then dropped them on the stone ruins. Those that weren’t killed by the fall wouldn’t be walking at of the battle under their own power. 

Haimish saw that he was losing his battle to keep the goblins from ascending the wagons at shifted tactics and shielded himself against the worg’s attacks while he prepared a spell. Menthos saw the goblins crest the top of the western most wagon and tried to pick them off, but the unsteadiness of his footing caused several eldritch blast to go awry. The goblins broke off into two groups, one busied themselves with unhooking the wagon from the two it was attached to, while another half dozen poured over the wagon and faced off with the caravan in hand-to-hand combat.

Turgar and Doopa fought their way to stand back-to-back only to surround themselves with a dozen mounted goblins, unwilling to face the ogre’s fury up close, the goblins switched to slings and rained rocks upon the duo. Enraged and not wanting to die at range of the enemy, Doopa bull rushed the western most worg cavalry and took a bite to his left forearm courtesy of the worg, but managed to shove the double threat back ten feet and create a gap in the ringed group. Xanthos dipped his wing and charged the eastern goblin and carried it twenty feet to Turgar’s feet and dropped it from a distance of ten feet. The startled goblin looked up and watched the dragon shaman’s longsword end it’s life.

Haimish completed his spell and spoke in goblin, “Okay, tell me if you’ve heard this one before. A goblin, a mind flayer, and a hell hound walk into a bar. The goblin wants an ale, the mind flayer wants a red wine, and the hell hound wants water. Only one of them ordered for the group, why did all three of them get water? Because the hell hound is a bitch!”

All but one of the goblins assaulting the caravan keel over in laughter as _Tasha’s Hideous Laughter_ grips them tightly, this makes the caravan’s job much easier as they are able to gang up on the lone standing goblin and eliminate that threat while they can pick apart the laughing defenseless ones at their leisure. 

Xanthos turned in the air and dove in for another swoop against the goblins, as he got low and made ready to pry the scared creature off his big dog, a convergence occurred with Doopa and Turgar and the ogre mage lit up the trio with a _lightening bolt_. Doopa’s great constitution shrugged off the damage, Turgar wasn’t so lucky however and he collapsed in a twitching mass of pulsing muscles on the ground. Pain ripped through Xanthos, causing him to alter his flight path and he missed grabbing the mounted goblin. Xanthos changed tactics and transformed into a tiger and landed on the ground a few feet behind the worg.

Doopa saw a brief flash of light, felt the sting of electricity course through his body, then watched the fried goblin in front of him disintegrate in the wind as the worg below it yelped from the singed skin on it’s back. The ogre pounded away at the worg and soon ceased it’s howling.

Haimish charged a worg circling Turgar and bashed his shield into it’s haunches and slashed his sword across the back of the mounted goblin, causing it to screech in pain before falling off the worg and bleeding out. The worg turned to face it’s new threat, but was unable to get it’s jaws around Haimish’s shield to bite the bard.

Menthos stopped aiming at the goblins disconnecting the wagon and turned his sights on the circle of death moving to surround Haimish. The warlock eliminated two of the goblins and Xanthos took down the worg he was battling with before they could reach Haimish.

The unamused ogre mage whipped _magic missiles_ into Doopa’s chest as the ogre set his sights on the leader. Menthos abandoned his position and raced over the tops of the wagons leaping across three wagons to reach the northern most one and only thirty feet from Haimish and Xanthos as they struggled against the death defiant worgs.

*whistles* “Hey mutts up here!” Menthos shouted as he activated his ring and sent a shower of golden sparks through the air, dazzling the simple beasts and allowing Xanthos and Haimish to kill two worgs immediately.

The ogre mage grunts in frustration and covers the area in a _cone of cold_, freezing whatever life Turgar had left and nearly felling the barbarian. Xanthos and Haimish avoid the worst of the damage, but now their brief moment of elation was turning sour as the prospect of a continued magical onslaught from the ogre mage began to look like a reality.

The only remaining goblins (those that weren’t frozen by the cone of cold) call over a few worgs and they tether them to the wagon to act as beast of burden, the goblins then begin to slowly pull the wagon out of it’s defensive ring and towards the south.

“We’ve got to take down the mage, he’s going to kill us!” Xanthos shouts as he ignores the seven remaining worgs and charges towards the ogre mage, the _cone of cold_ however left an unwelcome surprise, it had coated the ground in it’s area of effect with a sheet of ice, making movement a slippery endeavor and charging impossible. 

Menthos switched targets to the ogre mage as Doopa arrived to beat on the creature with his tree trunk, the smilodon snapped it’s jaws at Doopa, but only gritted air as the ogre took the full brunt of Doopa’s swing and laughed at him.

The worgs had as much difficulty as the party in moving across the icy ground, Haimish decided to even the odds a little more and steadied himself for a slashing strike as worgs tried to run past him. He took down two more before he needed to move to attack any further.

Menthos launched another eldritch blast at the ogre mage then turned to the frightened caravan below him, “Get out here and defend your lives like you want to live, or I’ll make sure the next blast of ice ends all of your cowardly lives!” 

The verbal lashing focuses the caravan into slinging at the ogre mage who still sits and watches the stones bounce off his skin as if they were flowers. The fleeing goblins get the wagon turned around and headed east, perpendicular to the river. They line up a shallow crossing as best they can and aim for that.

The ogre mage reaches out with his long massive arms and throttles Doopa about the neck, squeezing the trachea and staunching the blood flow to and from the brain. His large fingers near encompass the barbarian’s entire neck. Doopa drops his club and flails against the hold of the ogre mage as the blue skinned ogre lifts the girthy Doopa off the ground. Xanthos hurries as best he can on the ice to reach Doopa as Haimish readies another _Tasha’s Hideous Laughter_ spell. Menthos pours eldritch blasts into the blue ogre as stones continue to rain upon it’s form. 

Then nothing, the ogre and big cat were gone. Doopa fell to the ground gasping for air as Xanthos reached the barbarian and transformed to administer healing to the barbarian’s neck. The caravan cheered claiming their stones had driven the creature away. Menthos just scoffed, then he saw the missing wagon stuck in the river to the south.

“Oh Xanthos, looks like we have some escapees. Maybe we could torture one into telling us where their hideout is?” Menthos cooed.

Xanthos’ ears perked up and he transformed back into his giant owl and took flight at the last of the goblins. Xanthos got twenty feet into the air to clear the ruins and never descended, transforming back into a tiger and dropping the twenty feet right on top of the surprised goblins. His frustration tears into the humanoids, blood and innards are sent flying as Xanthos deliberately spares a lone goblin from the same fate. The last goblin dives into the icy water and tries to swim to the far side of the river. Xanthos leaps into the water and transforms into a river dolphin and pins the goblin to the bank on the far side of the river.

Menthos and Haimish arrive to deal with the now harmless tethered worgs as Doopa sits and tries to regain his bearings. Xanthos transforms back to an elf and hefts the soaked goblin out of the water and tosses him back to the party’s side of the river. 

“Get the info and then make it take you to it.” Xanthos instructs, a primal fury still resonating in his voice

Menthos backhands the goblin and falls upon the creature, kneeing it in the stomach while doing so, “Where are the goblins coming from?”

The goblin spits and coughs trying to catch it’s breath.

Menthos backhands the goblin again, this time drawing blood as it’s lip tears from the contact.

“We come from Hledra.” The goblin coughs out

“Who is your leader there?” Menthos demands, shifting his weight to apply more pressure to the diaphragm of the goblin

“Gorga.” The goblin issues

“Was that Gorga on the saber-toothed tiger?” Menthos asks

“No, that Grikshawk” The goblin answers

Menthos pulls a dagger from his belt and holds it to the neck of the goblin then bends in close to the thing’s ear, “You will take us to Hledra, or I will damn you to an eternity in a lake of scouring salt. Each day it will flay your skin open to expose the tissue beneath to the painful memory of burning salt. You understand me?” 

The goblin nods and Haimish pulls Menthos off the creature, “Okay, I think he’s had plenty. I don’t want to smell goblin piss all the way to this Hledra because you scared it’s bladder to death.”

“Hey, ugly ogre still alive!” Doopa shouts from across the encampment

Fearing the ogre mage had returned, Xanthos runs to Doopa’s side to find Turgar still breathing albeit in distress. Some quick meditations later and Turgar was resting peacefully as the party and the caravan retrieved the loosed wagon from the river and got it back in line with the rest of the wagons. Haimish saw to the goblin’s “protection” not entirely trusting any of the other party members to keep it alive long enough to get to Hledra. 

As dusk began to overtake the afternoon sky, the caravan was back on track to Kindoras and the party was headed north into the Majestics toward Hledra.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Building bridges to a better tomorrow*

The party has the captured goblin, bound and gagged, lead them on a three day trek almost due north. Xanthos notices the ground has been stomped and smoothed by the passages of hundreds of creatures, he wonders just how prolific this goblin city could be. Goblins aren’t known for their planning and architecture, but a cave the size that would be needed to house a goblin army the size of what he extrapolates from the beating the ground has taken, would have to be huge and the geography of the region doesn’t lend itself to that kind of hole in the ground. 

After the second night, Xanthos became worried over Doopa’s antsiness over getting his club shoved into the neck hole of a goblin. Xanthos had to carry the goblin the third day, Doopa’s eyes never ceased burning a hole through the goblin the night before and Xanthos thought it best to keep the goblin safe for as long as possible, hoping that more than enough goblins could be found to sate the ogre’s appetite soon enough.

The wait was not long as the goblin halted at the bottom of an ordinary enough looking hill.

“hmmrdd gn hffss snnd” The goblin gagged

“We’re here!” Xanthos said overjoyed at not having to watch Doopa mentally pound the goblin into goo.

“How do you know that? I speak gagged goblin and I think he said he had to go to the bathroom.” Menthos counters

Exasperated, Xanthos places the goblin on the ground and ungags him, “did you have something to say?”

“Hledra is on other side.” The goblin states

Xanthos gives Menthos a not so pleased glare and then re-gags the goblin, much to the chagrin of the humanoid.

“Doopa say let him go, see if goblin get to top of hill before Doopa club reach goblin head.” Doopa offers

“No, we can’t kill him. At least not yet, I want to see what’s on the other side of this hill. Haimish can you watch our prisoner for me?” Xanthos asks

*why me* Thought the bard then he realized he could let the thing go as soon as Xanthos reached the top of the mountain, “Sure no problem, I’ll keep it safe.”

Xanthos handed the goblin over and then ascended the hill, slowing once he neared the top. Xanthos peeked over the crest and saw a large sprawling city ringing a tall tower-like castle of obsidian. The dark stone reflecting the rays of the sun in brilliant washes across the bowl-like depression Hledra rested in. Xanthos saw all manner of creatures working in the city, from kobolds up to bugbears and hobgoblins. He did not see the ogre mage or anything more advanced than hobgoblins in full plate, although there were a few structures that looked to be able to house a giant or two in them. 

Below Haimish was quietly untying the goblin as Doopa jumped around behind the bard, slack-jawed and eye wide, slobber spraying the party from all directions as the thrill of a hunt even a lopsided one marred Doopa’s fragile control of his emotions. Haimish found the going difficult, finding that apparently Menthos can tie a good knot, and then the goblin sensing its immediate demise began to work against Haimish untying it. The goblin shifted its weight and tried to spin away from the bard’s hands.

“Can’t you handle a bound goblin?” Turgar inquired fearing that he would have to put Doopa down if things got out of control.

“I’m doing the best I can here!” Haimish yelled back

The goblin fell over and Haimish threw his hands up in the air in frustration, this caused Doopa to wildly *woot* as he bent his knees to leap on the small goblin only to realize it was still tied and had not just tripped running away.

Doopa’s scream brought Xanthos back to the party, “What’s going on here, can’t you guys keep it quiet? There’s an entire town of goblins on the other side of this hill.”

Xanthos’ words spoke to Doopa’s heart and the ogre embraced the shifter and started up the hill.

“Whoa, whoa. There’s thousands of goblins over there.” Xanthos said as Doopa’s smile just got bigger and bigger, yet he continued to climb.

“That’s more than ten Doopa,” Xanthos said, the ogre shook his head in understanding yet continued to climb

“That’s more than all the people in Highcastle.” Xanthos said

This caused Doopa to pause for the moment.

“That doesn’t make any sense; they could overtake Kindoras anytime they wanted with that force, why would they just play with them?” Haimish asked

“They’re goblins, no planning, no direction, no sanitation, and no retirement plan.” Menthos advised

“They are what they are, but Haimish does bring up a good point. The ogre mage was certainly capable of leading the goblins on a raiding foray, why isn’t he leading them to the keep to wipe it away and not have to worry about their resistance.” Xanthos answered

“Why don’t you go ask him?” Menthos suggested

“I’d be killed; we’re going to need a better plan than that.” Xanthos replied

“Maybe, I say use the element of surprise to your advantage, turn into a rhino and charge your way to the front door and demand to be seen by the ogre mage.” Menthos offers

“That plan has no foresight, have you ever laid siege before?” Xanthos berates the warlock

“I don’t have any foresight, I’ve been circumcised, and as far as laying siege goes, I typically don’t ask names.” Menthos replies

“You’re impossible and of no help.” Xanthos dismisses the teifling

“Now if you really got an accurate assessment or poll, you’d be able to see that most people find me easy and very helpful.” Menthos answers

“Uh, animal man. What those flying things?” Doopa asks standing tall on the top of the hill

“Eek! Get down Doopa!” Xanthos shouts as he races up the hill and pulls Doopa down to his knees.

The shifter stares out to what Doopa was pointing to and spies four wyverns circling the tower, “Crap!” Xanthos says

This brings Haimish and Turgar up the hill as well to view what’s going on at Hledra, leaving Menthos and the goblin alone at the base of the hill.

“Well, there goes most of the plans we could initiate.” Turgar states

“I think we should head back the keep and rebuild its defenses and hope Hledra ignores it for a few more weeks.” Xanthos explains

“That sounds better than anything my head was coming up with.” Haimish answers

“Hey where goblin go?” Doopa inquires

The party all look at the bottom of the hill, “There he is still laying on the ground.” Xanthos says spotting the goblin

“Didn’t we leave it face up and over there?” Haimish pints out, as it appears the goblin is now laying face down about fifteen feet from where it had been laying.

Recalling from his memory, Xanthos feels Haimish is correct and they all head back down the hill. Xanthos reaches the goblin and turns him over to find a sucking chest wound to his sternum that has pierced both lungs, air bubbles up through the seeping blood from the wound.

“Menthos!” Xanthos yells

“What?” The warlock answers behind the shifter

“What did you do?” Xanthos demands

“I followed you guys back down the hill.” Menthos answers

“You killed a helpless goblin.” Xanthos points out

“I did not, I followed you guys up the hill and back down, maybe it committed suicide?” Menthos offers

“its hands were bound and there’s no blade anywhere near here, you’re a known dagger carrier let’s see your blade.” Xanthos demands

“How dare you accuse me of this offense, everyone knows it’s the dagger and not the person holding it that’s to blame, and I’m not about to play show me yours show me mine with you.” Menthos defends himself

“Fine we’ll do this my way, Doopa hold him.” Xanthos orders as the ogre’s wide hands envelope Menthos’ arms holding him fast.

“Help Haimish, I’m being manhandled!” Menthos announces

“I’m not getting involved in your tiff.” Haimish answers

“Well at least set me free, you surely value personal freedom right?” Menthos says, playing on Haimish’s personal ethics

Xanthos quickly begins empting Menthos’ belt pouches and backpack.

“Xanthos, he said he didn’t do it. Let him go.” Haimish says

“Why? So he can stab us in the back literally?” Xanthos answers

“You’re not going to find any blade on me; you’re wasting your time.” Menthos states

Xanthos finds nothing of note in the backpack or pouches and moves to inspecting every seam and each boot on Menthos’ body.

“Where is it? You’re hiding it somewhere on you.” Xanthos screams

“I assure I am not in possession of anything sharp enough to put my eye out if I tripped on it.” Menthos says calmly

Xanthos searches for another minute before Haimish pulls him away and instructs Doopa to let Menthos go.

“What Xanadu mad about, goblin dead, Doopa would do it if goblin still alive now.” Doopa inquires

“We needed to know routes into the city, guard details, what and who is in the castle. But, hot head over there had to go and kill him.” Xanthos answers pointing at Menthos

Haimish takes Xanthos away from the warlock to try and calm him down, while Menthos begins re-filling his carrying containers.

Doopa bends down to assist and leans into the teifling, “Good job, Doopa wish he was there when Goblin die.” Doopa gives Menthos a pat on the back as they finish cleaning up Xanthos’ mess

The party decides to head back to Kindoras and put into motion their defensive plan. Turgar thought he spotted something gleaming in the stunted grass off to his right, but waved it off as a trick of the light and a stressful three days. Menthos noted the gleam to and knew he’d miss that knife; he’d have to pick up another one once he got back at Kindoras.

The party has no incidents as they return to Kindoras, Xanthos lays out what he saw at Hledra. The farmers and commoners brought in to help the fledgling keep are terrified and Gorn realizes that his meager force will not be enough to hold off a single wyvern let alone four of them.

“I know of a barbarian village north of here that has been suppressed by druids, I will go there and seek help on your behalf for additional military support.” Xanthos offers

“If you’re successful there ya might want to investigate Omen they got rangers and other tree sniffers there.” Gorn suggests

“Fabulous, that will definitely be a destination as well.” Xanthos agrees

“Might get a better response once you tell ‘em Hledra is only five days from ‘em.” Gorn offers again

Xanthos transforms into an eagle and flies to Catalan and then to Omen, he manages to get no help at either place. Catalan’s leaders view Kindoras as an abomination on the landscape and the Omen rangers thank him for the information, but they were already aware of the city and feel they are prepared for an all out assault should Hledra decide to bring it. Returning defeated, Xanthos transforms into an ogre and the three ogres set about helping rebuild the northern wall of the keep.

Haimish however recruits Menthos to come with him to Catalan to speak with the druid leader there. Menthos’ ego demands that he speak first to the druid leader and he is shown the door almost immediately after opening his mouth. Haimish however tries a different tack and instead of going to Catalan’s leaders, he speaks directly to the barbarians oppressed into a sedentary farming life by the druids. His speech is moving and over two dozen barbarians immediately join his cause and agree to march back to Kindoras facing the prospect for mayhem and the killing of goblins.

This of course does not endear Haimish to the druids of Catalan nor does it improve their relationship with Kindoras. Haimish and Menthos are hailed as great men by the commoners of the keep. The Kador contingent however views the Catalan barbarians as more trouble than they will prove to be worth. However the barbarians set to work right away with assisting in the work to rebuild the north wall. 

For three months the work continues on the keep, Xanthos helping reinforce the walls with plant growth and plant shape spells, the barbarians, aside from excessive drinking and in-fighting, prove to be valuable assets. Forming their own militia and pulling double shift with helping rebuild the keep. Xanthos keeps in constant contact with the rangers of Omen and appraises them on the keep’s progress. Several times over the past two months Omen has made scouting trips in a wide circle so as to stop by and see the keep’s progress in person. 

Nothing was ever heard from Kessen, nor was there any body found by the rangers or barbarians as they scouted for goblins. Hledra kept sending out small forces of goblins who quickly met their doom at the hands of the zealous barbarians or deadly rangers. Menthos and Aleena consulted frequently on the upgrades need for the keep and improvements to it’s general defense. This prove five with the rest of the party as it often meant Menthos got to talk to Gorn and that kept the Captain of the guard off the backs of the party and from annoying the barbarians.

Then the scouting party from Omen didn’t make their scheduled stop at the keep, concerned over their safety Xanthos flew out to Omen to see what had happened. He saw the small figured opaque skinned, huge south moving force long before he saw the wooden palisades of Omen….


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Grand Theft Menthos*

Xanthos dives down at Omen, barely clearing the wooden palisades. He transforms back into an elf before reaching the ground and tumbles over himself before his momentum is slowed enough for him to halt his tumbling.

“Hledra is coming!” Xanthos shouts as a group of omen’s rangers begin to gather

“From the north, one, two days out possibly. Large force, you should prepare your evacuation plan!” Xanthos says gasping for air 

“We will not surrender our homes without the loss of goblin blood!” Shouted a dwarven representative

“Your resident force cannot hope to defeat the army pressing down on you, better to retreat and fight another day than stay and not live to see revenge.” Xanthos counters

The stubborn dwarves however refused to budge, and the rangers sworn to protection by the Overlord were bound to stay as long as the dwarves mined the nearby land of metals.

Disappointed but understanding the dwarves position, Xanthos took to the air again and sped back to Kindoras where the intervening months had done wonders on the ogre’s physique. Both now stood over eight feet tall with Doopa the larger of the two at nearly nine feet tall.

Xanthos explained what he had seen and the response from Omen.

“Let them die. If they’re too stupid to move out of the way from the charging rhino then they don’t need to be using up my oxygen.” Menthos replies

“I fear the loss of life will not be prevented, likely Kindoras will be next once Omen falls.” Xanthos replies

“Doopa think we go there and kill goblins before they get to Omen, best defense is killer offense.” Doopa explains

“If a whole town of rangers and dwarves won’t stand a chance, why would you think we could?” Turgar asks

“Doopa smash, pretty voice man sing, many things man turn into ‘nother Doopa, wizard man do magic, and Turdgar wring hands and complain about flesh wounds.” Doopa answers, laying out his plan of attack.

“You’re insults are sophomoric and tiring, I shall not debate with inferior intellect any further.” Turgar responds

“See, already Turdgar tired and we not even go anywhere yet.” Doopa comments

“Why don’ cha go ta She-Wolf an’ recruit some o’ their dwarves? Maybe ya could get dem to fight wit cha?” Gorn offers

“That has be to the first constructive comment you’ve given us in four months, you must see the value of keeping Omen goblin free.” Xanthos states

“No, I donna think ya’ll make it ta She-Wolf, an I’d rather not have ye ‘ere.” Gorn says with a slick smile

“Maybe I should do that, and after we repel the goblins at Omen, we can march on Kindoras and displace you?” Xanthos counters

“You could try, but what makes ya think dem dwarves are gonna foller a pointy elf anyways?” Gorn replies chuckling to himself

“Our path is clear then.” Menthos speaks up, “We recruit a force from She-Wolf, march it to Omen and engage the enemy there.” 

Stunned silence falls over the party

“Menthos cares? I’m speechless, is Armageddon upon us?” Haimish inquires

“I wasn’t finished yet. Then while the two forces are locked in mortal combat, we destroy the town and then head back to She-Wolf and take over that town as well. Kindoras would control everything from this keep to Omen to She-Wolf and then Hledra would be next. A new kingdom is born, then those uppity Catalan grass eaters would be next to fall. I say with two years the kingdom will be knocking on the front door of the Overlord’s palace.” Menthos clarifies

“Figures, I spoke too soon.” Haimish states

“The kingdom of Menthos would be a tyrannical monarchy that I would be forced to bring down.” Xanthos states

“Why? If all opposition was wiped out, wouldn’t that appeal to your sense of morality? As long as I’m not selective about you I have to kill to lord over a region, then I would expect full support of someone who worships the laws of nature and survival such as yourself.” Menthos responds

Unable to ethically argue the teifling any longer, Xanthos removes himself from the conversation.

“I think that would be a brilliant way to expand the Kadorian faith, subjugate or face the machinations of Menthos.” Aleena comments

“I always knew you had an ego, yet somehow I’m stunned to learn you’re egomaniacal instead.” Haimish advises

“I shall collect some fetishes and portents for your journey, tomorrow they will sing the beginnings of the Kindoran Empire!” Aleena decries and excuses herself back to her room.

Gorn snorts and walks away upset that it appears he’ll be stuck with these people for the foreseeable future. 

“What is your problem? Those fire guys have turned you into a power hungry land grabber.” Turgar inquires

“Calm down, I have to play this close. Can’t let them think I’ve gone weak. I’m still with you guys, but that Aleena is one devout chick. I think her chastity belt has forbiddance cast on it, Kador knows I’ve tried getting close to it.” Menthos advises

“I can’t trust you, whose side are you on?” Haimish inquires

“The same side I was four months ago, nothing’s changed since I’ve been out here.” Menthos answers, evading the bard’s questioning

“Quit dancing around the issue, either you’re with the Kadors or you’re against them. You can’t be both.” Haimish questions

“Doopa head hurt.” Doopa interjects

“Small brain, lack of oxygen.” Turgar answers

“Listen, I’ve got an itchy trigger finger and I’ve got this nagging feeling of wanting to kill things and take their stuff. Either we go out there and we kill a bunch of goblins, or I’m going to have to start closer to home to get my kicks in.” Menthos says, putting an arm around Haimish.

“Is that some kind of threat?” Haimish demands why slapping Menthos’ arm off his shoulder

“Not to you, of course. But, things between us and Gorn might get a little dicey.” Menthos answers

“Doopa ready to fight, when we leave magic man?” The barbarian inquires

“Tonight, I think we should rest up and try to cut as many days off our travel to She-Wolf as possible. Dwarves aren’t exactly known for their sprinting ability and once we pick up a force of them our travel times will screech to a halt.” Menthos relates

“Well that part was tactical at least, better let me do the talking.” Haimish states

“Fat chance, you’re a trueborn. One whiff of you and they’ll scoff and toss you out on your non-existent wings. Better to let personality disorder turn into a dwarf and let me do the talking while you play a dwarven drinking song on your banjo.” Menthos offers

“It’s called a lute, and I’m a far better negotiator than you are.” Haimish counters

“I got news for you, you go parading that thing around as loot and it’ll end up stolen to some dwarven hovel.” Menthos points out

“It’s lute, not loot. Now you’re just distracting me from the real argument. Now, I will be the one talking and you will be the one forming the press gang with the giants over there.” Haimish states

“I don’t do gangs, too organized. How about we just go fight now?” Menthos steers the conversation away again

“No, we need to pla…” Thud. Haimish’s unconscious body slumps to the floor after Doopa clubs him over the head.

“Doopa hear magic man say fight, and music man say no.” The ogre flashes a smile at the warlock

“You’re not subjugating me by force!” Turgar shouts and brings his long sword to bear on Doopa’s bare chest.

“Nobody is subjugating anyone, but we can’t’ stand here and argue the best way to recruit the dwarves, we need to head out towards She-Wolf and decide on the way. Not fight it out here and lose valuable time.” Menthos argues

Wary of the warlock but unable to put forth a viable disagreement with the teifling’s words, Turgar lowers his blade and agrees that leaving now would be for the best.

“Ok you two get Haimish on his horse and find Xanthos, tell him we’re heading out.” Menthos instructs

The two ogres leave to complete their tasks while Menthos goes to visit Aleena to pick up whatever trinkets she mentioned she was giving to the party.

“Knock, knock. Aleena you in here?” Menthos asks

“Yes, just finishing up in here. Statinisor would be happy to learn of your expansion plans, to think I even questioned your loyalty. I am sorry for that.” Aleena answers

“Eh, you know how subordinates are. Either you walk on them or they walk on you, and if you’re not getting any higher when you walk, then you know which way it is for you.” Menthos replies

“So true, here. Statinisor told me to give this to you once you acclimated yourself to the keep. I’ve been keeping it hoping to see you crack and you haven’t yet.” Aleena hands over a small orange fire emblazoned velvet bag.

Menthos accepts the gift graciously and opens it to reveal a hefty sum of gold coins, a large fire opal and a wax sealed letter. Menthos retrieves the letter, placing the bag on the floor and tearing into the parchment like a dog after marrow.

_Menthos, I hope this package finds you well.
Placed inside is a small gift to assist you during The Dimming
While the light made fade, the fire burns as hot as ever
Please see to it that Gorn is ever reminded whose outpost this is
Aleena is a faithful if not a wholly confident leader
You would do well to avoid her “softer” side, 
Her motivation lies within the fire of anger within her 
Or the passion of victory, not between them_

“Gee, this would’ve been helpful three months ago. I shall make sure Statinisor fully realizes what the delay in my response was.” Menthos speaks sternly

“What? I was led to believe it was a reward for your work for the church, it sounded and smelled like gold coins.” Aleena responds

“Do you not think Statinisor would not take precautions to avoid non teifling eyes from viewing the accounts in this letter? A holy warrior such as yourself should know what is at stake here! Yet you left me to dangle in the wind while to plied your divinations upon me? I counter that it is you who is unfit to rule here.” Menthos pounds his fist at the air 

“I had no idea, I merely wished to know why my liege would choose a non-pyromancer. I only wanted what was best for the faith. I.. I… I….” Aleena breaks down in tears at the foot of Menthos, “Please forgive me, I meant no disloyalty.”

“Forgiveness is not of my nature, however if I return from vanquishing the Omen and Hledra armies you have shown the type of leadership that would ignite a frozen piece of stone into a pyre, then I shall take that into consideration when I send my report to Statinisor. You’ve already failed Statinisor, do not fail me.” Menthos demands and turns to leave the sobbing Aleena to her own mind.

“Where are you two going?” Xanthos inquires

“We’re going to pry the stain of goblins off the palisades of Omen with the bodies of fodder dwarves!” Turgar says proudly

“He’s turned you too? And what happened to Haimish?” Xanthos demands, taking a defensive stance

“Doopa bonked music man for taking too long to decide battle is best!” Doopa says pounding his chest 

“I’m not going with Menthos and you’re not taking Haimish either.” Xanthos says firmly

“Lighten up Xanthos, we’re going to need to hurry to get our dwarven force to Omen before the city is overrun.” Menthos says ridding up alongside Doopa

“I’m not allowing you to do this.” Xanthos states

“Do what? You think I could take over this region with you and the two stinky brothers opposing me? I may be crazy but I’m not stupid and neither are you.” Menthos answers

Xanthos mulls that over and agrees with the warlock, and is upset with himself for not realizing the warlock’s button pushing allowed his emotions to get out of his control.

As they turned towards the gate, an acolyte ran out from the priest’s quarters and up to Menthos’ horse.

“Here my lord, gifts from Priestess Aleena with a prayer for a victorious journey.” The acolyte handed over a leather pouch. Menthos opened it and peeked inside, then quickly closed it.

He nodded at the acolyte, but did not speak to him. Menthos turned and rode through the gate, followed by the rest of the party.

“Gud riddance da lot ‘o ya. I hopes ya falls off yer horse and dies on the way dere!” Gorn calls out from the battlements

Menthos pulls his horse up and turns back to the captain, “While I am gone, please build a good sized viewing area with lots of seating, as well as rack that would support your frame. When I return I will bring the head of an ogre mage and mount it to your ass, then charge 1 silver piece for the keep to view it.”

Menthos kicks his horse and rides off, the thundering of the hoof prints drowning out the colorful metaphoric response from the captain before the distance gained reduced those cries to mere whispers.

“What was in the bag?” Xanthos inquires

“Potions. Either of healing or poison. Maybe you should sample one and see for us?” Menthos answered and this time he wasn’t bluffing.


----------



## Jon Potter

Soo... two things.

1) What's the deal with Kessen? Did you lose a player?

2) Was the four month jump in time a game break or did you just set the clock ahead?

2.5) I'm quite enjoying the regional politics going on behind the central "goblin-stomp" story. Great stuff.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Soo... two things.
> 
> 1) What's the deal with Kessen? Did you lose a player?
> 
> 2) Was the four month jump in time a game break or did you just set the clock ahead?
> 
> 2.5) I'm quite enjoying the regional politics going on behind the central "goblin-stomp" story. Great stuff.




1) Kessen comes back, albeit briefly. The player stopped showing and then he stopped communicating, so you'll find Kessen's last appearance fitting of such an end. This isn't like Benet from the last SH where the player had to leave for school and planned to return.

2) They spent the 3 months fixing the keep in game so it was merely a calendar jump. The party busied themselves around the keep until the keep could defend themselves and the party could go exploring. The 3 month jump does become critical once they return to Kindoras Keep however.

2.5) Well, it's going to get much deeper. I will give some teases by saying that Menthos' affiliation score with Kador goes through the roof (by doing something you'd never think he'd do), One PC is caught between an elder vampire, Orcus, an alhoon, and an artifact and it's not Menthos, soon after Kessen departs we add 3 new PCs!


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> The player stopped showing and then he stopped communicating, so you'll find Kessen's last appearance fitting of such an end.




I can hardly wait.   

I have to say that I'd almost rather have a disruptive player than an apathetic one. I've had three players over the years who've just up and disappeared and it left a very bitter taste in my mouth at the time. Oh well, I'll look forward to some DM story hour revenge.



> One PC is caught between an elder vampire, Orcus, an alhoon, and an artifact and it's not Menthos




Yikes!

And my money's on Haimish!



> soon after Kessen departs we add 3 new PCs!




Man you must be a glutton for punishment running games that big! Are any of the new PCs giants by any chance?


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Man you must be a glutton for punishment running games that big! Are any of the new PCs giants by any chance?




Actually it's worked out great, the last couple of times we've played there's only been 4 people so it's probably a good thing we have 7 PCs to pull from.

None of them are giants, one is an elf, one is a drow, and the other is a karsite.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Actually it's worked out great, the last couple of times we've played there's only been 4 people so it's probably a good thing we have 7 PCs to pull from.




That's still got to be tough to juggle characters between sessions if you have to break somewhere other than "in town".



> ...and the other is a karsite.




Not familiar with that one. Sounds interesting though, with both an elf and a drow in the party.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> That's still got to be tough to juggle characters between sessions if you have to break somewhere other than "in town".
> 
> 
> 
> Not familiar with that one. Sounds interesting though, with both an elf and a drow in the party.




It's hard when it's Doopa that's not there as I have to adjust some encounters, otherwise nothing really changes. For the most part the party has complete control over their TPK, mainly because they get over-confident not because the encounter itself is too hard.

A Karsite is in Tome of Magic, and he'll be a binder (the class they were designed for), I'm looking forward to trying to write the binder up, not for personality but for how the class works.

There will be a death in the party soon and that player's replacement PC is very odd. I don't want to spoil it as he kept it secret from the rest of the group for almonst 2 months while they tried to figure out what race/class he was.   



			
				Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Yikes!
> 
> And my money's on Haimish!




Did you plant a wire at our games?      

That's spot on, now of course how he gets there and what he does about it are the stuff of legends and he is a bard of course.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*To incite a dwarf....*

The travel to She-Wolf was uneventful, save for Haimish waking up, falling off his horse, and then loosing a tirade of obscenities in four different languages at Menthos. Only after learning that it was Doopa who knocked him out did he clam down.

She-Wolf was as far from it’s name as could be, the dingy town was a co-op of dwarves and halflings which used it’s port on the Great River to move ore form Omen to Highcastle and ports east on the river and even to the coast. After travel through the Dearthwood became suicide from the vast numbers of orcs residing therein, the river route become the next logical course. Of course it’s proving to be far more expensive as it’s nearly impossible to protect the barges from bandits along the riverbanks and under the river’s waters. Some bandits would even launch alchemist’s fire, Molotov Cocktails, and flame arrows to burn down a barge and then salvage the gold and ores from the bottom of the river. The Overlord was paying patrols nearly double a routine route would pay to patrol the banks along the river between Highcastle and She-Wolf. 

The town was merely a bunch of warehouses and shacks interspersed with numerous drinking establishments. The metallic smell of the unrefined ore and that of stale ale made the taste of dust in the back of the party’s throats seem better by comparisons. The only structure that looked anything like a permanent building was the huge barracks which housed the Overlord’s paid guards to make sure She-Wolf didn’t fall into orc, Skandit, or worse Virdistan hands. Xanthos estimated that a whole company could be housed there. 

“Why couldn’t we just get half of the Overlord’s men to go up the road to Omen that should take care of the goblin problem?” Turgar wondered aloud

“I suspect the mobility the rangers posses in the wild is more advantageous than announcing one’s presence with a large moving force.” Xanthos answered

“That makes it seem as though Omen’s trying to be sneaky about their shipments, or …… maybe there’s some intentional missing shipments?” Haimish ponders

“That is a pessimistic view, but a viable one I suppose. I just think the money involved in staffing the trail with guards constantly on duty this far form Highcastle wasn’t cost effective so you use what you got, a bunch of wily wilderness people who know the mountains and trails like their own spider veins and pay them to ensure the shipments reach She-Wolf.” Xanthos counters

“Looks like I picked the wrong commodity to get involved in, this scam has my name all over it.” Menthos announces

The party leaves Doopa and Turgar to stable the horses while they pick out the first bar to try their hands at recruiting a band of dwarves to help defend their brethren. The first bar they come to has no sign, just the dwarven symbol for heavy and drink on the door.

“Looks like a good as place to start as any.” Xanthos states

“Ok, let me do the talking.” Haimish pipes up

“What? We agreed you’d be better off playing with you loot while shifty here transforms into a dwarf and I rile the patrons up.” Menthos objects

“That plan got scraped as soon as you decide it would be a good idea to leave me unconscious while you dragged me here, so I’m doing this my way.” Haimish countered

“Fine, don’t need me? I’ll go find a bar to get drunk in, come find me as you’re being tossed out of town so we can all ride to Omen in demoralizing fashion.” Menthos says as he brushes away the shifter and the bard to go find his own solace in good strong dwarven ale.

Xanthos transformed into a burly dwarf, while Haimish used his oratory skills to paint a picture of brotherly unity with stories of old dwarven heroes before the fall of their kingdom. Haimish compared the coming battle at Omen to that of finding one’s purpose in life, dwarves were meant to own the mountains not goblins. These goblins were going to take that which Korak created for them so long ago.

Xanthos spoke of tactics and the smell of battle, of blood and the sound of victory. Both speeches were moving and brought a tear of remembrance to many a dwarven eye, however they could not sway any to abandon their current role in the wheel of these to help “brothers” who didn’t want it. 

Bar after bar the same scene replayed itself out over and over, and each time the results were the same.

“These dwarves have become complacent in their lives, instead of standing up for themselves, they’ve resigned to defeat before the battle is even engaged. This must be the most pathetic group of dwarves in a single location to ever gather. Not even once did we even get a maybe.” Xanthos bows his head in frustration.

“Well, we should try and head north to Omen as quickly as possible no sense in staying here overnight if all it’s going to do is get us both drunk, although the prospect of finding what I think will be left of Omen doesn’t exactly inspire me.” Haimish agrees

Fuming, Menthos heads for the opposite side of She-Wolf than what Xanthos and Haimish are carousing. He stops just outside a small building that has the sounds of dwarven signing inside and turns back to look across the rest of the town. Menthos decides to watch and see just how well the other two do before he goes into the bar. After pacing for what seemed an eternity, Menthos watched Xanthos and Haimish leave the bar and head to another one. Intrigued that they had no following, he continued to watch as the duo exited bar after bar more dejected than when they entered. Suspecting they were not faring so well, Menthos waited until the closed the distance to his location and then made his way over to that bar to here the speeches given to the dwarves. Moved by their words and yet confounded by the lack of enthusiastic response, Menthos ponders how to rectify the problem.

Menthos overhears the two ogres arguing about how to stable a horse, drawn to the exchange like a moth to it’s death in a lantern, the teifling’s legs steer the warlock in that direction.

“Music man say to stable horses, this horse already stable.” Doopa argues

“He meant put the horses in the stables for the night so they don’t wander off moron.” Turgar retorts

“Why not tie horse to tree and not pay?” Doopa counters

“Because the tree could care less what happens to the horses, this way we pay for someone to make sure they’re safe.” Turgar answers

“Turdgar pay Doopa and Doopa make sure nothing happen to horses.” Doopa offers

“I wouldn’t pay you attention, let alone actual money.” Turgar responds

“Doopa horse is stable, Doopa not need pay human to tell Doopa that.” The barbarian replies

“It’s got four legs of course it’s stable, but that’s not what we’re talking about here. I realize Kindoras doesn’t have a stable and your tribe eats horse meat rather than getting the most out of them, but I assure you this is what they meant by stabling the horses.” Turgar argues

“This not Cloudwalls where Turgar tribe foul up water for Kneegnash tribe so we no drink water and plants die so have to eat horse where Turgar tribe get to use horse as plaything and carry things because Turgar to weak to lift himself.” That comment elicited a fist to the face from Turgar 

The two ogres roll around on the ground trying to out grapple each other as the poor stable master fled in fear to his home attached to the stables. Menthos watched the ogres and realized he had what he needed to inspire the dwarves to greatness. Peering through the dimming light with a vision accustomed to dark dank places, Menthos spied the largest building that would house a bar and headed there.

Menthos approached the rickety door, hanging from only its top hinge, the door looked like old driftwood that an elf wouldn’t even care for. Menthos smelled the strong alcohol and listened in on the boisterous conversations about the timid dwarf and his lute carrying pansy buddy, and realized his plan was perfect.

Menthos kicked the door in, careening the door off its frame and snapping the hinge out of the frame along with about a foot of wood as well. All conversation stopped as Menthos felt the weight of dozens of stares fall upon his nimble frame. 

“I’m looking for some dwarves, anybody know where I can find some?” Menthos challenged

Laughter breaks out as someone from the back of the bar shouts out, “You found some teifling, now run along and finish your scavenger hunt somewhere else after you pay me for that door you broke.”

Menthos sets off a loud disagreement from his colon, “There, paid in full. Keep the change.” 

“Don’t insult me boy, I’ll rip the ancestry out of your soul and crap all over it!” Comes the response

Menthos slaps the nearest dwarf I the face, “I’m waiting, this place has no dwarves that I ever heard of. What self-respecting dwarf drinks from an establishment that’s made form wood? Elves do that. What dwarf doesn’t welcome the chance to commit genocide against a race of sniveling barrel scrapping goblins? Apparently not you wussies.” 

“Hey, your buddies were already in here touting your fight, we’re not going unless they ask for help, so trudge back to Omen and wish for a miracle.” Comes the reply

“Dwarves don’t wish for miracles, they make them. With axe in hand they carve a legacy that lasts longer than a treant’s memory. You sit on your elven stools, and drink your gnomish mead, Omen will defend itself with the dwarves that are still there and it will be their legacies that your poets lament, not the languid She-Wolf dwarves who couldn’t even mount an offensive after watching a teifling smack around one of their own in a bar full of them. Absolutely pathetic.” Menthos answers and heads for the open exit……..

Followed by most of the bar, a full forty three dwarves who grab their axes and shields and strike up a war dirge for the march to She-Wolf.

Xanthos heard the dwarves first, Haimish heard as soon as Xanthos stopped to discover where the sound was coming from, the sight of Menthos leading forty dwarves through the filthy streets of She-Wolf made him both laugh and cry at the same time.

“What’s this?” Xanthos asked

“I used this product I got from an old shopkeeper called army builder, works pretty good, I’ll have to get another one.” Menthos said with a wink

Haimish collected the rumbling ogres and led the dwarves north to Omen by the light of a waxing moon.


----------



## Jon Potter

Ao the warlock's a better public speaker than the bard, huh?


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Ao the warlock's a better public speaker than the bard, huh?




Different tact, the bard painted a picture of history and what he thought they should be doing. Then rolled low   

Menthos said "I wanna piss them off, get them good and angry. In fact I want to throw in some intimidation with my speech." So I gave him a little bonus to his roll (based on how the dwarves in She-Wolf are personality-wise) and he rolled really good. That's the difference.

Haimish is good with diplomacy, Menthos is good with intimidation and G.I.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*The battle is engaged*

Xanthos halted the parade before they headed out on the road north to Omen.

“We need some supplies, forty boisterous dwarves marching against an army of goblins aren’t’ exactly stealthy.” Xanthos comments

Xanthos takes Turgar and Doopa to procure a large wheeled cart.

“Make sure it’s a new cart, I’ve heard used ones will get you off the lot and then collapse spilling dead bodies across the road.” Turgar laments

“Where do you shop? Need to get you to an elven craftsman.” Xanthos advises

They spot a large four-wheeled cart parked behind a shack of a home near the northern fringe of the town.

“That’ll do, Turgar knock on the door and see if the owner would be willing to sell it to us.” Xanthos asks

Turgar knocks for ten minutes before stopping to advise no one’s answering, “Let’s find another one.”

“No, that’ll take to much time. Turgar please go find us some pitch, Doopa please help me with the cart.” Xanthos instructs

“What? You’re just going to take the cart?” Turgar asks

“No, I will be paying for it ten fold. Now please hurry.” Xanthos advises and Turgar runs off to find some pitch

“Doopa please help me lead the cart away, take it back to Haimish.” Xanthos instructs

Doopa grabs the cart and leads it away from the home and north to rendezvous with the rest of the party. Xanthos takes a seed from his pouch and plants into the ground where the cart once rested. After covering it with dirt, he sticks his hand back through the loose soil and grasps the seed for a moment to cast plant growth on it. Soon a robust cherry tree erupts from the ground spraying the area with soil and debris as the tree’s upper branches make known the new presence of flora within She-Wolf. Even as the tree grew in stature, the smell of cherries began to waft along the slight southerly breeze.

As Doopa dragged the wooden cart to Haimish, the bard and Menthos watched in wonderment as a huge tree spread its arms over a small wooden shack beneath it.

“What’s that for?” Menthos asks Doopa

“Doopa not know, changing man said to bring to music man.” Doopa replied

“It’s probably for these.” Turgar answered carry four barrels of pitch as he approached the group

Turgar placed the pitch onto the wagon as Xanthos arrived to continue their journey north.

“What was the tree for?” Haimish inquires

“Payment for the cart.” Xanthos answers

“Doopa not like it, Doopa think dwarves will chop down.” The ogre comments

“Why would anyone do that? That tree is going to bring the owner many years of fruit and wood to come.” Xanthos responds

“Maybe because it’s the only tree in a two mile radius, you’ve just marked that dwarf’s home as a nature lover.” Menthos answers

“So? What’s wrong with that, someone has to grow the food they eat, aren’t they nature lovers?” Xanthos scoffs

“You wasted a spell to create firewood is what you did.” Menthos responds

Xanthos waves him off and takes point ahead of the wagon as the dwarves anxious to get moving exhale a collect sigh of relief at finally getting underway.

The dwarves march tirelessly, much to the chagrin of Haimish whose human body kept telling him time and time again that rest was needed. Still the bard pressed through not wanting to hold back the rest of the force just for him. 

Halfway through their trip, the air began to get measurably colder. Both Menthos and Haimish felt the cool air bite through their clothes and gnaw at their bones.

“It’s it a little early to be getting cool Xanthos?” Haimish inquired 

“It’s an aberration yes, however this far up the Majestics, who knows how early winter sets in.” Xanthos answers

The mid day sun shone brightly above which helped to warm them a little. Haimish admired the resiliency of the dwarves who seemed to plow forth as if each obstacle was placed there to be overcome, not dwelled upon. Menthos however had another word in mind when he thought of the dwarves’ obvious fortitude prominence.

Xanthos located a wide valley the cart could traverse that might cut a full six hours off their travel time; the party shifted directions and proceeded down the steep walled crevasse. Raising the paranoia level of the ogres, who imagined goblin ambushers all along the cavern walls raining rocks and spears down upon the party.

“Doopa not like this, feels wrong.” The barbarian announces

“It is wrong, quit touching yourself.” Turgar dug in

While not claustrophobic by nature, the dwarves felt uneasy amid the unnatural silence that seemed to permeate this valley. Most of the dwarves along with the party kept their eyes peeled on the ridges above. Turns out they should have kept them peeled on the caves below.

Four long snakes shoot out from a darkened cave and snapped up a dwarf in each mouth, then returned to the cave from whence they came. They moved so quickly it was the disappearance of the dwarves themselves which drew the shouts of surprise. The caravan lurched to a halt as Doopa spurred his horse towards the cave, the dwarves reached for their crossbows and like a company that had been training for years the clicking of bolts into place on the crossbow echoed as one loud sound.

The only remaining sound was that of Doopa’s horse as it galloped across the valley floor. The dwarves steadied their hands waiting for more snakes to emerge or re-emerge from the darkness. Doopa reached the cave entrance and dismounted as his eyes adjusted to the now dark conditions. Towering above him were ten weaving and swaying snakes, each attached to a bloated reptilian body with four massive legs and a tail twice as long as it’s body.

“Hydra!” Doopa yelled as he launched himself into melee with the creature

The dwarves steeled their gaze as Turgar rode up towards the cave as well. Both Haimish and Menthos stood their horse’s ground. 

“Hydra? That’s odd, we’re nowhere near a swamp, the only hydra I know of that hides out in a mountainous region is a..” Xanthos started before gouts of freezing fire erupted from the cave’s mouth.

“Cryo-hydra!” Xanthos shouts back

“Hmm.. no wonder it’s so cold.” Menthos stated

Doopa tore into the creature with the savagery of an ogre who hadn’t killed anything in months. The initial apprehension of learning what they faced lasted longer than the battle it took to take the beast down. Soon Doopa and the dwarves were ridding the cave of the body and carving it for a feast worthy of a march to their deaths. 

Menthos and Haimish both welcome the addition of a bonfire, as the death of the cryo-hydra did nothing to allay the frigid conditions. They both ate quickly and retired early to get some sleep before the finishing march tomorrow. Xanthos advised the gathered that he planned to leave in mid-early morning long before dawn so has to make Omen by late afternoon. This pleased the dwarves as well as Doopa who after getting his first action in months was looking for another fight.

The cold morning departure time arrived along with the accompaniment of a snow shower. Xanthos noted the extreme weather change for early autumn and could not remember a time when it was this cold this early, and thought its presence was a bad portend.

The rest of the march was uneventful, Xanthos guided the force though a small copse of fir trees where they would be harder to spot and allow them some prep time. The dwarves whispered amongst themselves a hope that Omen still stood, an idea that would allow them something to fight for in addition to the destruction of as many goblins as they could manage before Karak called them home.

Xanthos noted the lack of battle sounds and smells of any kind and thought that a good sign, as death usually permeates it’s odor over everything near to it. It wasn’t until the tree line came into view and Omen could be seen on the hill above that Xanthos figured out why the lack of senses detail existed.

A strong snow storm raged outside the fir forest, within the party was sheltered against the majority of its effects. The wind blew from behind the firs and up the hill. Omen’s walls still stood on the south side, although dark smoke clouds billowed up and out to the north from within the town. Xanthos could spot no goblins along the southern facing side of the town, he did however spot a lone figure suspended in midair above the town. Blue skinned and large, the ogre mage spun slowly in the air and shot what seemed as random lightening bolts into the interior of the town.

“Omen still stands but it’s under heavy siege, I’m going to fly out and get a better idea of what we’re facing.” Xanthos announced as he stepped out from the trees and felt the full brunt of the wind batter him like a ship’s sail. The shifter transforms into an eagle and takes to flight.

Xanthos nears the town and drops in low and lands next to a wall, transforming into a thoqqua, Xanthos burrows through the mounting snow and hardening earth to get under the wooden wall of Omen and up into the town itself. Xanthos then transforms into a rat and peeks his head out of the snow.

Above the maniacal ogre mage lung lightening all over the ground. What seemed random from hundreds of feet away, Xanthos saw was really the ogre mage focusing on large holes dug into the ground of Omen. Exiting his own hole, Xanthos made his way to the nearest hole and dove into it, transforming back into an elf as he did so.

Adjusting his eyes, Xanthos came face to face with a dozen Omen residents. Eight dwarves and four human rangers crowded in a small dwarven dug tunnel.

“Help has arrived.” Xanthos announced, to far less fanfare than he expected

“How long are we supposed to wait for the shifter to return before we attack?” A dwarf shouted as over an hour had passed from when Xanthos left.

“I don’t know, I suppose we should start drawing up our own plan b in case he doesn’t return.” Haimish spoke

“That won’t be necessary.” Xanthos’ voice broke the malaise, “Omen is in dire trouble, I have a plan to get us in the town and free the besieged residents.”

Xanthos explained that about a hundred of the town’s protectors remained, mostly dwarves which brought a cheer of greatness form the dwarven force. The town’s gate was being pummeled by hill giants while the ogre magic launched shards of electricity at the defensive positions of the survivors, seemingly without end. Goblins were present but had not attacked since unleashing volleys of arrows into the town yesterday. Xanthos proposed dumping the pitch and igniting it, then letting the smoke race up the hill to obscure the party’s advance to Omen. He assured the party without a clear line of sight, the prospects of getting electrified by the ogre mage was remote.

The dwarves agreed and Doopa and Turgar raced about forty feet out from the tree line and began dumping the pitch. Xanthos spotted the change in Omen as a growing darkness around the base of the wall, peering more closely, he spotted the ranks of goblins encapsulating the town.

“Hurry up, the goblins have surround the town!” Xanthos shouted

Doopa tripped in the snow and spilled the barrel of pitch his was carrying, Xanthos looked back to have a handful of dwarves run out to help the ogre, when his eyes caught black shapes racing down the hill toward the party.

“Impossible, we’ve been noticed. I don’t see how, we’re practically invisible down here!” Xanthos cried out in shock

Turgar looked up and recognized the jerky movement of the shapes, “Not seen, smelled. Those are worg cavalry, and we’re upwind.” 

The truth of it sank in for Xanthos and he realized the pitch would need to be set far sooner than planed, “Set the fires!”

“Doopa not done yet!” Doopa shouted back from his kneeling position, thick pitch oozing off his snow melt frame.

Menthos lit the small pitch fire that the dwarves would use to dip their bolts in and fire into the pitch slicks the two ogres had created. Turgar was racing back to the tree line when the first slick went up in flames. Thick black impure smoke roiled up the hillside, the ogre mage almost instantly ceased his spinning and focused his attention to the blacken spot of Doopa rising on the hillside below. A shout of an order rang out of the ogre’s mouth and the gather goblins on the southern wall abandoned their current duty and began to trudge down the hill at Doopa.

A second pitch pile went up in flames, this one in-between Doopa and the tree line. Black smoke engulfed the ogre and his position was lost to the party as the smoky cover hid his location. Two more piles went up, and now neither side could see each other. 

“Can you get me inside the walls?” Haimish asked Xanthos

“Yes, but why would you want to go there?” Xanthos inquired

“What if the giants break through while we’re trapped down here? I’d rather fight off the giant’s than a hundred goblins and dozens of worgs.” Haimish explained

Xanthos acquiesced and transformed into a pegasus, Haimish climbed aboard and the two of them took off for Omen. The ogre mage noticed them immediately.

“This is going to hurt.” Haimish said as they neared Omen

Xanthos dipped in low and into the pitch smoke to help conceal their approach and to allow Xanthos to estimate how far the goblins had come down the hill. They encounter no goblins however, which gave Xanthos a pause as he was positive they should be somewhere in the smoke. Xanthos pulled up and out of the smoke wall twenty feet from the wall and felt the first bolt of lightening tear through him.

The blast nearly tore Haimish off of Xanthos’ back, but he held tightly, another bolt connected as Xanthos cleared the wall.

“Get out of here, I’ll draw his fire!” Haimish shouted as he slipped over the side of the pegasus and plummeted twenty feet to the ground. 

That however didn’t stop the ogre mage from lighting Haimish up with a bolt as he plunged towards the earth. Wracked with pain from the electricity, Haimish found some relief from his heated breastplate as he landed in the snow next to a hole in the ground. Shoving his left hand down into the snow and finding hard ground, Haimish was able to fling himself into the hole as another bolt crashed into the lip of the hole, melted the snow and sent dirt flying. 

Xanthos circled around and cleared the wall heading back towards the party when the ogre mage’s lightening struck him. He felt his heart skip as his vision went dark for a second, he started to plummet and decided to use that to his advantage. Letting gravity pull him down, once his mouth tasted the smoke, Xanthos transformed into a rat and landed in the dirty snow below. Xanthos heard the mass of goblins ahead, waiting to pounce on whatever waded in the smoke towards them. Fearing for Doopa, Xanthos transformed into a wolf and headed to the western side of the smoke trail, he followed the edge of it back to its origins, transformed back into an elf and shouted for Doopa, “Doopa, they’re waiting for you. Come to my voice before the goblins reach you!” 

“Doopa not afraid!” The barbarian shouted, much further to the east than what Xanthos expected, in fact it sounded as if Doopa had made it nearly out of the smoke bank.

Menthos spent his time picking off approaching worgs who had remained outside of the smoke, Turgar stood behind the dwarves waiting to give the order to fire at anything that sounded close or moved out of the smoke near the tree line.

“Doopa here, you want fight! Come get it!” Doopa shouted as he stepped from the cover of the smoke

“Doopa, No!” Xanthos screamed as hundreds of goblin voices lauded for the easy kill

Fear and apprehension washed over the faces of the heroes as the sight of this mass of small bodies waddled out from the dark smoke like a cancer. Not Doopa however, first the first time in four months his heart sang in preparation for the coming slaughter. 

“Fire!” Turgar ordered as the dwarves unleashed thirty plus bolts through the opaque shifting wall of darkness. The sounds of dying and confused goblins told Turgar that the first volley succeeded.

Menthos had taken out six goblins riders before they could reach Doopa’s position, looking up he saw only one remaining mounted enemy on his side, this one was bigger than a goblin and carried with it a standard emblazoned with red and orange as they charged down the hill.

“Turgar, daddy goblin is coming up this side. Care to help me put him in time out?” Menthos asked

“What about Doopa?” Turgar answered

“He’s buying us time, let’s not waste it.” Menthos replied, knowing that Doopa was likely dead and knew it. The barbarian was going to go down swinging though.

Turgar hesitated, then ordered the dwarves to continue to fire into the smoke, angled best to assist Doopa. He then looked up and nodded to Menthos as the two of them left the cover and safety of the trees to meet the orc warlord. 

Haimish counted four dwarves and two humans in the hole with him, “Can you signal the other holes?”

“Yes.” A dwarf replied, producing a curved horn

“Excellent, when the giants break through we’ll need to wait until they’ve gotten close enough for a coordinated attack to surprise them and do the greatest amount of damage.” Haimish replied

“Then what? We can’t kill them all.” A ranger piped up

“Then we escape the same way they got in, they want the town and we need to regroup. Can’t do that separated in a dozen small groups while the giants poke at us from above with that ogre mage up there blasting away as well.” Haimish answered

The sullen visages on the dwarves told him they weren’t going to abandon the town as readily as Haimish hoped. 

“The dwarves of Thunderhold fear no giant. We’ll not take the easy way out.” A dwarf advises

“Who said this was the easy way? I fully expect to die trying to get past the giants and whatever else breaks in.” Haimish announces, taking a page form Menthos and using the prospect of death and a glorious fight to motivate, not to mention his own battered body which looked as if it could not withstand the spit from a kobold.

“Aye, that be worth seeing.” The dwarf replied and put his hand in, the remaining dwarves and rangers did so as well, now Haimish had to hope the rallying trumpet rallied the rest of the survivors when he needed them to rise up and attack as well.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Medic!!!!!*

Haimish peered out over the lip of the punctured ground to get a look up at the ogre magic blasting the ground like a self-contained electrical storm, “If we could just get rid of him or at least cease whatever he’s using to keep blasting us constantly.”

“He’s too high for us to hit him with our arrows and bolts, believe me we tried. That’s what cost us most of our forces, while we were trying to take him down the stunted wretched fired upon us from the backs of their worgs.” A ranger replied

“Really? How odd, how far up would you say he is?” Haimish asks

“At least three hundred feet, but with this wind it might as well be three hundred leagues.” The ranger replies

“Interesting indeed.” Haimish answers and exits the hole

“What are you doing?!” yell the collective dwarves and rangers within the hole

Xanthos hoped to get under the smoke, but realized his plan worked too well as the smoke hugged the ground as it ascended the hill. He decided he would have to take to flight again to have any chance of helping, transforming into a bat and using echolocation to navigate the think smoke, Xanthos delved deeper into the smoke aiming for the source of it to get back to the dwarves to have them split and advance towards Omen.

Menthos and Turgar gave Doopa’s battle a wide berth. For the most part the mounted goblins ignored them; more focused on bringing down what they thought would be easy prey in Doopa. The ogre swung his club in swooping arcs, his upswing kicked up goblin bodies and flung them back into the gathered mass. Worg yelps and goblins screams drowned out everything, carried on the rushing wind the sounds ricocheted up the hill and off the walls of Omen. 

To draw the attention of Karnak is to bring death upon you, for the god of slaughter likes nothing more than abject destruction. Doopa faced down hundreds of goblins and dozens of worgs, his hands slick with the blood of many, his clothes saturated with the dying life force of an enemy ill prepared to face death, his weapon singing the dirge of Charon overloading the death man’s barge with souls.

Doopa raged against death, battled the fatigue of war and plowed through the field of bodies sow seeds of destruction as he waded through the mass of flesh. His eyes flushed with splashing ichor, his mind more focused than it had ever been, his body went beyond a simple rage of determination and passed unto a state of utter berserk of a parent defending their child until their last breath has been drawn. 

The deeds of the knight are well recorded in the annuals of their liege’s tower, the paladin’s conduct sung on high by the voices of angels. The barbarian’s actions are repeated by the coarse throats of skalds huddled next to a fire in dying landscape. Weapons of legacy and artifacts of the ancients are born from such legends, Excalibur’s greatness cemented by the man who wielded it. Doopa created two legends on this field, for ten bloody minutes the ogre slew over one hundred goblins and three dozen worgs. The assistance from the dwarven crossbowmen would be erased from history, this would become the Kneegnash tribe’s hero on this day another constellation was created to be named years later in memory of the one who brought the Kneegnash’s over the mountain.

Turgar set for the charge against the orc warlord barring down on himself and Menthos, the ogre lit up his defensive aura ready to give the orc a nasty surprise if he connected with his obsidian lance. Menthos distanced himself from Turgar, not wanting to get caught within range of the worg’s jaws. 

The orc snarled as he drove his beast towards the defiant ogre. Thirty feet from contact, the worg lifted off the ground. Anger rose through Turgar, how could the orc deny him this battle? Turgar moved back to try and catch the orc when he landed, hoping the orc wasn’t headed for the dwarven crossbow line. The dwarves would all likely abandon firing and switch to hand-to-hand combat to deal with their mortal enemies, that would be a disaster Turgar could not allow. 

Xanthos heard Turgar’s challenging shouts and changed directions, transformed back into a pegasus and lifted through the smoke bank. The orc warlord pulled on worg’s bit and made a hard left and dove for the pursuing Turgar. The ogre raised his longsword to fend off the stone lance, the orc feinted and Turgar swung his blade forward and down slicing the air in front of him. The orc rode over the top of Turgar and punched the lance down through the neck of Turgar skewering the dragon shaman along the spine.

Turgar dropped everything his was carrying as he felt a burning pain in his neck but found his limbs were unresponsive; his eyes saw that instead of falling he was being lifted through the air as an eldritch blast from Menthos slammed into something above him. It took Turgar another moment to realize he was adorned to the lance; the orc spun his worg in the air and pointed the tip of the lance down at Menthos. Turgar felt his chest squeeze as the very life-force was wrung from him along the length of the lance. A black bolt of foul energy shot forth at Menthos how managed to dive out of the way; he still felt the tendrils of negative energy as they dissipated around him from the blast site however. Finished with Turgar’s spent body, the orc shoved the desiccated corpse from his weapon and cackled as it fell lifeless to the ground below.

Xanthos arced in the air and gained height on the orc warlord, rolling over he went into a death dive on the orc from above transforming into a troll at the last moment and pouncing onto the back of the orc. Xanthos dug his claws under the breastplate of the orc and tried to both wrench the orc off the worg and tear into the orcs innards at the same time. The orc activated a power latent in his armor and turned into the consistency of air. Xanthos flailed helplessly as he fell through the orc and began to plummet to the ground below. Xanthos shifted into a pegasus again and began to ascend towards the orc anew.

Cursing aloud the orc returns to the land of materialism and receives another salvo of eldritch blasts form Menthos. Xanthos speeds towards the orc the fire of vengeance burning through his veins. Sensing the desire within him, the orc holds his hand out in a receiving manner and utter a single fiendish word “heart”.

Xanthos’ chest caves with pain as the shifter’s body convulses in midair. Menthos watches as the pegasus’ chest bursts open and Xanthos’ heart is expelled from it and into the waiting hand of the orc. Xanthos hears his pounding heart no longer as his body attempts to return to his base form of a centaur unsuccessfully. An amalgamated mass of flesh crashes down below the orc and begins to bleed out turning the white snow pink then bright red. 

As a tiefling, Menthos lived on the edge of death all his life, never had he been able to taste it in the back of his throat like this moment. The orc warlord turned slowly in mid air as if taunting Menthos, realizing that he was all that was left capable of attacking him at this moment, the orc descended methodically drawing out the inevitable. Menthos searched the contents of his many pockets and backpack with his mind, trying to come up with something to save his skin.

Haimish yanked free from the dwarven hand that tried in vain to bring him back into the hovel. Haimish stared up at the ogre magic and cursed its existence in defiance of its apparent superiority. The ogre mage rained a bluish electron hell upon the armored bard. Bolt after searing bolt arced through his body, Haimish just smirked, never had he called a bluff with this many stakes on the table before. It felt good, liberating, it felt like giant-ass kicking time.

“The ogre mage is an illusion, ignore it, it can no longer harm you. Omen rise and defend!” Haimish’s inspiring words pierced the crackle of lightening and cracking of wood as the hill giants finally beat down the gate to Omen and began to wade into the center of town and entered the very hearts of the last of Omen.

The hill giants were initially disappointed to find their efforts wasted on one loud mouthed trueborn shouting in the middle of the town, then their spirits were lifted as Omen rose from the ashes of an oppressive illusion and began filling the giant’s vision with things to pound. Then the little ones shot their stinging sticks at the giant’s and their hopes turned to fear as dozens of arrows and bolts found their purchase into the bodies of the invading giants.

Shouting in giant, Haimish addressed the hill giants, “You grave is prepared! Come to me so that I may put you in it!”

The six giant’s snarled and began to advance, the dwarves and rangers of Omen began to question Haimish’s plan until the giants got within twenty feet of Haimish and then Haimish charged the giants. Blackened and bruised from what his body took as real damage from the ogre mage earlier, Haimish couldn’t let the giants strike him. However he could let the Omen people see fear and if he had to go out, at least he was going out on his terms.

Doopa’s weapon slipped from his hands several times, wet from blood and sweat the weapon careened off the mounting bodies to rest some distance away. Each time a brave goblin would race out to try and claim it as its own and each time its actions would be followed by several more of its buddies. This only created an artificial beacon for Doopa to trace to his weapon, and the backs of the goblins made for open shots form the dwarven crossbowman. Doopa switched to his won hands to smack and pound his way through the fearful crowd on a path of maiming to his club. Once he’d reached it he would pluck the lucky goblin that was holding it up off the ground and use its body to wipe the club clean, ignoring the inconsequential prods the rest of the goblins made into Doopa’s hide. 

As the goblin horde began to thin the dwarves switch to axes and raced through the snow to engage the enemy on a now level playing field. The dwarves fought their way to the large ogre, using his position to adjust their movements. Several minutes later the two forces, one of ancestral determination and the other of pure rage met on the battlefield. A nod of respect was exchanged before Doopa collapsed, his adrenaline soaked body finally spent of its fury, the dwarves rallied and hefted the body of Doopa out of the carnage and back through the thinning smoke and into obscurity.

Menthos quick glanced over at Doopa’s last position and saw the dwarves lifting his body and carrying it back into the smoke and then disappearing after him. Thinking he was the last left standing and relatively confident no one could hear he scream, Menthos pulled the only card he had left and utter a word so black and foul that only Kador himself fully understood it’s meaning. Menthos felt the capillaries throughout his head burst as four new rows of small sharp horns grow from his skull as the last syllable from the word was uttered. 



**** I used the mass battle rules from _Cry Havok_ I just could never roll high enough to kill the ogre early enough, I haven't seen so many 1's and 2's EVER ****


----------



## Jon Potter

Well, that was brutal. I was sorry to see the dragon shaman fall since I've never seen one in play. What's your/your player's perception of the class in retrospect?

And also, was the ogre mage *always* and illusion? When they met him the first time was it the real OM?



			
				Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> **** I used the mass battle rules from _Cry Havok_ I just could never roll high enough to kill the ogre early enough, I haven't seen so many 1's and 2's EVER ****




Haven't read the _Cry Havok_ rules, but I love the way this played out. That random element's what makes games so much fun to play!

At least for me it is.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Well, that was brutal. I was sorry to see the dragon shaman fall since I've never seen one in play. What's your/your player's perception of the class in retrospect?
> 
> And also, was the ogre mage *always* and illusion? When they met him the first time was it the real OM?
> 
> 
> 
> Haven't read the _Cry Havok_ rules, but I love the way this played out. That random element's what makes games so much fun to play!
> 
> At least for me it is.




Well, the class is really good for support, more often then not Turgar had to either get involved in melee himself or everyone was so far spreadout that his support value was nil. Needless to say his next character is a tad more traditional class-wise at least.

The Ogre Mage was real the first time, *I had more to write but took it away so as not to give away a particular character's fate*

The smoke screen would've been brilliant - had there been no worgs with scent available, still it did provider much needed cover at the beginning of the fight.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Are you the keymaster?*

The orc warlord washed away his hatred for Menthos and seemed to even soften his countenance. The worg lowered towards the warlock as the orc raised his lance to a vertical position and rested it on his thigh. Menthos feel blood rush through his head, the pressure mounted but not enough to cause a headache.

“You speak the old tongue, how did you come to be here?” The orc asked

“I was sent help with the assault from the south, I culled a bunch of dwarves from the town south of here in hopes they would also die on this battlefield. They did, but too late to prevent the destruction of your goblin horde.” Menthos replies

The orc surveys the southern side of the battlefield; dozens of goblin bodies are visible at the edge of the smoke, their killer not visible from this low vantage point.

“Just you were sent?” The orc demands

“No, I had a cryo-hydra with me as well, but that ogre and his buddies killed it a day south of here. They were on their way to free Omen from our siege.” Menthos responded

“That would’ve been a very handy beast to have. We need to flush out the Omen survivors and take the town.” The orc announces

“The battle is won, look around you. The giants even now are wiping out the last vestiges of humanity.” Menthos replies pointing to the hill giants in Omen swatting at their feet with their massive clubs.

The orc shifts his gaze back to the town, he watches as the giants wade further and further into Omen, “Yes I suppose you’re right. Go back to Horjimir and report we’ve taken the town.” The orc commands

“I think you should be the one to go.” Menthos suggests

“Why is that?” The orc questions turning his head back to face the teifling

“You can fly, you’ll get there quicker and they’ll be able to send out goblin reinforcements to replace the ones lost here.” Menthos answers

“Yes, I see the wisdom of your answer. Here let me give you a lift.” The orc offers

Menthos climbs aboard the back of the worg and the orc takes off for Omen, as they fly over the southern wall Menthos spies the last few ragtag survivors battling it out with two hill giants. Over the din of battle, Menthos can hear a familiar voice singing over the chaos.

The orc flies Menthos to the feet of the rear two giants and lands there. Menthos slides off the worg and stares down the giants.

“This is, uh what’s your name?” The orc asks Menthos

“Tehas Baggerus, T-bag for short” Menthos answers

“Tehas, will assume command of the Omen destruction until I return with more goblins. Obey him or I’ll have a point of contention with you.” The orc says lowering his lance at each of the two giants

The orc takes to flight and heads off to the north, the two giants stare down at Menthos, “Well?” comes their question

Menthos looks beyond them at the remaining Omen guard then back up and the giants, “The mine here is full of gold for whoever wishes to carry it out. I could use some well paid strong hands like yourselves, unfortunately you know how these things get out and someone’s feelings get hurt. Tell you what, prove to me that you two are the best for the job by whipping you two buddies over there before they kill the Omen survivors.” Menthos offers

“Why? We’re supposed to kill them all.” A giant replies

“And you shall, I want some fun first before you guys squash them all.” Menthos answers

Haimish didn’t know why the giants stopped beating his force, only that they were fighting amongst themselves now and the breather in mid battle was appreciated, it was then that he spied Menthos on the other side of the giants and assumed that the plan worked and reinforcements would be steaming over the palisades any second. 

The two fresher giants easily bested their weary friends and returned to Menthos for their winnings. Haimish saw the look of uncertainty upon the face of Menthos and understood that there were no reinforcements and the lack of anyone else from their party making an appearance sank his heart.

“You take us to gold!” the giants demanded

“I will as soon as I have my fun, we’ve got all night might as well see what food Omen has stored around here.” Menthos replies

“I am hungry.” A giant answers and both agree to search for food 

As they busy themselves Menthos makes his way to Haimish who is holding back the rangers from charging the “devil” and killing the warlock.

“What happened to you?” Haimish asks pointing to Menthos’ new horns and twisted facial features

“Gas.” Menthos replied

“Where are the others?” Haimish questions

“Turgar and Xanthos are dead, Doopa might be. It’s just us.” Menthos answered

“Hey ugly man, you gonna kill them or what?” the giants ask

Menthos’ transformed façade made him more aware of small annoyances, such as a peculiar scratching and dragging sound.

“I’ve got a better surprise, come over here and look at this jewelry!” Menthos shouts

Two dozen longswords take aim at Menthos’ throat as the rangers ignite their fury, the giants couldn’t get to Menthos quick enough and Haimish lowered his shoulders in defeat as Menthos had seemingly toyed with them and turned against him.

As the ranger’s swords went up and the hill giant’s feet crushed a nearby building, Menthos gave Haimish a wink.

Dozens of crossbow shafts filled the air and peppered the nearest giant, his stride went off balance and he crashed in-between Menthos and the incensed rangers. The dwarves of She-Wolf flung themselves over the wall, rallying the surviving Omen dwarves and shifting the ranger ire to the downed giant.

The rangers and dwarves on the ground quickly overwhelm the downed giant and tear him to pieces. The remaining hill giant screams in horror as he races for the far wall in an attempt to flee, more bolts pierce his back as he reaches the wall, grabs the top and hurdles the wall. Menthos and Haimish both call for the fleeing giant to be brought down, but the increased range cuts the bolts hitting the fleeing giant in half and he manages to stay on his feet as he flees into the snowstorm and disappears.

“Now what?” Haimish asks of Menthos as the surviving Omen residents celebrate with the She-Wolf crossbow wielding dwarves.

“This place is forfeit and so is my life once the orc gets back and discovers what happened, or more likely once my little charm wears off and he comes looking for me.” Menthos answers

“I have an idea.” Haimish tells the teifling

The dwarves tell of Doopa’s rescue and that he’s recuperating in the woods beyond the smoke screen. Haimish has a few dwarves bring Turgar’s and Xanthos’ bodies into Omen, seeing that Xanthos hasn’t left much to work with, Haimish moves on to Turgar’s body, and burning and removing clothing gives the ogre shaman a fairly decent disguise of a dead burned hill giant. Haimish then has all the bolts removed from the downed giant and that carcass burned as well, along with the two previously killed giants.

Haimish then spends the waning hours of daylight reconstructing a dead human ranger and parts of destroyed worg into a burned façade of a demonic teifling, this disguise far better Turgar’s.

“Now hopefully when the orc returns, he'll find you and four hill giants dead from massive fire damage and Omen burned to the ground. Think it’ll work?” Haimish asks

“Well seeing as I was out of ideas, this works better than anything I was coming up with, but why leave Turgar here? Aleena could probably raise him.” Menthos asks

“He was already dead and his sacrifice likely ensures the rest of us live, would you rather I leave a note that told the orc where to find you?” Haimish answers

Menthos understands and corrals the remaining humans and dwarves to begin a nightlong march to Kindoras Keep. Haimish has Doopa carry the remains of Xanthos with him.

“Why bring that along, it’s like putty, you could’ve used that to make anything.” Menthos inquires

“Xanthos had his heart removed, not something I can dig out of something else and stick in there with the remaining light I had. Plus he’d want to be buried or at lease reincarnated not burned and left to rot.” Haimish answers

“Why, that’s what you did to Turgar, left him to rot.” Menthos replies

“No, I left him to save us, there’s a difference.” Haimish answers

“Only to a trueborn.” Menthos responds under his breath

The trip back to Kindoras is uneventful as over one hundred dwarves and three dozen rangers makes for an impressive deterrent for enemies. The pissed look on Gorn’s face, made the trek al the worthwhile for Menthos, who wasted no time in announcing his return as he rode ahead of the rest of the group by a few hundred feet.

“Omen is sacked, She-Wolf is decimated and low on body count and Hledra was defeated at Omen. Three for one means you can kick my arse Gorn.” Menthos spits

“I nae by kissin’ nothin’ on yer ugly behind demon!” Gorn shouts back 

Menthos gives the captain the universal leave me alone sign and helps lead the wounded into the towers near the north side of the keep. Aleena and her acolytes impressed beyond mere fandom immediately set to work restoring the health of the wounded. 

“I thought ya said Omen was sacked demon?” Gorn whispers into Menthos ear, having walked up while the teifling busied himself with the wounded

“I thought you said you weren’t going to be kissing my arse, but I could have sworn I felt your hot stinky breath on it just a second ago.” Menthos answers

Gorn snots and walks off to shout orders to his guards and Catalan barbarians who had been conscripted into the keep’s defenses. 

Menthos notes a new construction going on in the center of the keep, it’s wide foundation already dug and the first stones laid, “what’s going on there?” he asks Aleena

“We received a Pentacle yesterday, your arrival has truly lead to this keep figuring prominently in the remaking of the northern wastes. We’re building a defense tower that will allow us to turn our defensive measures into offensive ones.” Aleena answers referring to the keep’s guards

“What’s a Pentacle?” Menthos inquires

“Five Pyromancers and their Tower of Fire.” Aleena’s eyes blaze with an internal light as she mentions the structure being built

“What will it do?” the warlock asks

“It will allow the pyromancers to fire blasts of fire from the top of the tower, protecting the keep from invaders, especially frost giants that tend to wander too far south in the winter.”  Aleena answers

“Interesting, where are they now?” Menthos asks

“They are in their rooms pouring over an old prophecy they claim points to this early winter as a sign of destruction. I think it’s a bunch of hooey, but I am not privy to the documents so I cannot say for certain what they portend.” Aleena answers

Menthos nodded at Aleena’s reply as Haimish and Doopa sauntered up to the warlock, “Looks like your little keep finally has some crowding issues.” Haimish observes

“Yes, but I’m not sure all will end well if we’re forced to huddle together in this weather for six months.” Menthos states

“True, Doopa and I are going to travel up to Catalan and see if the druids there want to take care of Xanthos’ body or not. Want to come?” Haimish asks

“No, I have some duties I need to attend to here. Be sure to take some rangers with you, don’t want to end up like Kessen and get lost on the trail.” Menthos answers laughing

In the morning Haimish and Doopa took a retinue of fifteen rangers along with Xanthos’ twisted body with them to Catalan. Aleena woke Menthos in the morning offering him a potion to help restore his youthful appearance.

“I’ve heard talk of the words of power, I’ve never met anyone who’s used them though, what did you do with them? Topple Omen’s walls, destroy the goblin army? Tell me all the boring details.” Aleena pleads

“I used them to have three giants killed, another fled screaming in the night, and the Hledra captain turned tail back to their home.” Menthos answered drinking the potion and feeling his face contort back to it’s original state.

“The Pentacle fears you, they think you are the catalyst and doom is the product.” Aleena states

“I thought that’s what Kador wished to happen, I would think they would relish proof of the prophecy.” Menthos answered

“Maybe, they fear their own lives and that makes them question whether or not the prophecy is real. Proof of one’s own death tends to motivate people in strange ways.” Aleena answers, unbuckling her breastplate

“In what way does it motivate you?” Menthos inquires

“I wish to be the receptacle that Kador returns in.” Aleena answers as her armor falls to the floor and her hair cascades down her back


----------



## Jon Potter

Man! Demons get all the chicks!


----------



## spacehulkster

I wish this was a LARP game.

But then HM would only be able to write it out as heresay!
(Menthos doesn't allow voyeurs)


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*A new member, or are you just happy to see me?*

Haimish reached Catalan in just over two days; he retold the tragedy at Omen and the death of Xanthos at the hands of the orc warlord. The Catalan officials questioned Haimish more on the odd weather pattern rather than the battle or its outcome. Haimish sensed they were actually please Omen had ceased to exist for the time being, Haimish chalked it up to the mining that was occurring there and the druids natural aversion to using the land in that manner. 

Haimish relayed the party’s trip north from She-Wolf and the weather they encountered and included the attack by the cryo-hydra as well. The Catalan council nodded in agreement with Haimish’s observations from the Southeast edge of the Majestics. Catalan sat midway on the Western edge of the mountain range and overlooked the barbarian plains, the city had once been a staging ground for numerous barbarian excursions across the plains. Twenty years ago however Grinnor the Cruel rampaged too far west and reached the Gigabolt Mountains and the druids that lived there. His horde was decimated and he was made to lead the druids back to his base. The druids quickly subverted the barbarians and all has been quiet for over fifteen years.

Haimish noted Catalan’s interest in the Majestics Mountains was something new and he wondered exactly what their new interest really masked. Catalan asked how the barbarians that had gone south to help rebuild Kindoras Keep were behaving themselves and when they could expect them to return. Haimish wondered if they were covertly asking if or when Kindoras would be rebuilt, or if Catalan had no interest in that morsel whatsoever and truly only cared about the barbarians. 

“I’m not involved in the day-to-day of the keep, that question is best left for those in charge.” Was Haimish’s reply

“Xanthos had made us understand your party’s role was to help in its rebuilding, are you no longer involved in that aspect?” a druid asked

_These guys are tricky_, Haimish thought. “I’ve never been involved with that, I’m more of an inspiration than a stonemason you could just bring Xanthos back to life and ask him yourselves.” 

“Whether Xanthos returns to us and in what form is the sole choosing of his spirit, it is far less taxing to seek these answers from someone who is present at this location and not expend our efforts to bring someone back to the Prime just to ask them a few questions.” The druid spoke

“Oh well, I just assumed you’d want someone to look into this weird weather pattern we’re having and someone who can fly over the range in a measure of weeks rather than years would be beneficial to you. I guess we’re talking about two different things here, my willingness to help and your indecisiveness in telling me what it is you want me to help you out with.” Haimish responds

“We know what the problem is unnatural; we do not need you to tell us this with your arcane divinations, the creatures of the mountains have communicated this to us already. Unfortunately that was two weeks ago and no further creatures have come down from the slopes since then.” The druid replies

“I’m sure Xanthos would love to help, he’s that kind of guy. Plus you’d get it done a lot quicker and not reduce your friend level any further.” Haimish offers

“Fine, we will see what Xanthos wishes.” The druid answers

Xanthos’ deformed body is placed in an oak circle as the twelve members of Catalan’s council form a circle just inside the oak circle. Haimish hears several sounds escape from the druids’ mouths, a rushing wind, a crackling fire, a landslide, and a babbling brook. All of these sounds wrap around Xanthos as a faint green light shimmers in the center of the flesh mound that is the current iteration of Xanthos. The light brightens and envelopes Xanthos, the light then turns a ruddy brown and recedes leaving the shaking form of a Dawn Elf huddled where Xanthos had been.

“The Xanthos spirit has returned to us, Gaia’s graciousness be witnessed.” The druids state in unison

No longer a centaur, the newly remade Xanthos kisses the ground and then accepts a cloak of leaves from the druids before joining Haimish and Doopa on the outside of the oak ring. 

“Welcome back Xanthos, everything feel alright?” Haimish inquires

“I am satisfied with the results. I assume by your presence here that you managed to defeat Hledra and you kept the orc’s head as a trophy.” Xanthos asks in a low monotone

“Yes and no. Menthos tricked the orc into leaving and Omen was able to repel the remaining hill giants. Turgar was lost however; I can tell you the whole story on the way back to Kindoras.” Haimish explains

“I will not be returning to Kindoras with you. I seek the orc who adorns himself with my heart. I take flight in the morning to Hledra, I will destroy him myself.” Xanthos answers

“Uh, I sorta had to promise we’d check out the weather problems.” Haimish states

“Check them out then, I will return to Kindoras once I have what is mine back.” Xanthos answers

“Um, the plan involved you doing aerial reconnaissance.” Haimish explains

“Foolish of you to involve a dead man in your plans, I cannot comply with your request at this time.” Xanthos answers, turns and leaves Haimish and Doopa bewildered

“Changing man seem mad at singing man.” Doopa observes

“No, I don’t think so, if he was mad at me, I’d be dead.” Haimish answers

The bard and ogre lead the rangers they traversed up to Catalan with back to Kindoras that evening, Haimish reconciles Xanthos’ attitude by stating aloud to Doopa that he never wishes to be reincarnated. Doopa states his understanding of what Haimish wishes and then promptly asks what reincarnation is.

“Ya got a vist’r!” Gorn shouts while kicking Menthos out of his bed

“What the hell time is it?” Menthos asks irked at the interruption of his beauty sleep.

“Time fer ya to come to da front gate!” Gorn answers

Gorn slammed the door to Menthos’ room behind him and proceeded to the tower exit/entrance before turning around to see if Menthos was following him or not. What he discovered was more tiefling than he cared to see.

“What?!” Gorn exasperated 

“Hey, you’re the one who said big emergency, come now, limited time only, everything must go, sale, sale, sale!”  Menthos said, arms waving theatrically, as his naked form walked up to meet Gorn at the tower’s door

“Yer not going out der like dat!” Gorn demands

“Move aside patsy, I’ve got guests.” Menthos answers and pushes his way past Gorn and heads for the gate.

The full moon overhead wrapped itself in a sliver halo, ice crystals in the air giving the moon a serene glow. Menthos pushed open the gate tower entrance as four guards therein snapped to attention, the guards circled a lithe elf slowing stroking the back of a large white tiger. Heavy steps and hurried breathing forced their way through the door behind Menthos as Gorn recovered his disbelief and ran to the gate. Shocked expressions gave way to facial avoidance as the guards all turned their heads toward the visitor once they realized the state Menthos was in.

“What’s the meaning of this? I don’t know this guy.” Menthos states

“Sir, uh he said he had been um following you and your party for um days.” A Guard distractingly got out without trying to look at Menthos

Menthos walked up to the stranger and looked him over. The elf stared at Menthos, counting the appendages below the teifling’s waist.

“Hey!” Menthos shouts while snapping his fingers in the stranger’s face, “I’m up here.” Menthos accentuates by pointing his index and middle fingers of his right hand at his eyes.

“Do all teifling’s have egos large enough to physically protect them, thus eliminating the need for clothing and armor?” The stranger asks

“No, I have the multi-attack ability and I don’t do biting.” Menthos answers smugly

“I witnessed your fiasco at Omen, I too wish to be rid of the goblin menace. I seek to aid your ridding of their tribes from the Majestics.” The stranger states

“Wait, did you just insult me? And if you were there, I really appreciated you staying the hell away and not saving lives.” Menthos insinuates

“I came far too late to be of any effective resistance to your plight.” The stranger states

“What makes you think you’re good enough to do it now?”  Menthos questions

“My road is littered with burned bridges under which has flowed many streams of misery, surely you of all people can appreciate that.” The stranger answers

“Nope, sorry you got the wrong guy. Unless it’s women, I ain’t buying.” Menthos replies

“Does your plan of attack involve tracking of some kind, in this weather you’d be lucky to spot a frost giant’s tracks let alone a small goblin’s.” The elf states

“A tracker huh? Do you shoot arrows and whine about how other people do your job better than you? And more importantly can you actually track and not fake it?” Menthos inquires

“I could track your forked tongue over the river of deceit three weeks after your reign ended.” The elf answers

“It warms my heart to know that my olfactory sense has not failed me, because this room is filling up with the stench of your BS. Other than tracking what special talent do you have?” Menthos asks

The elf’s eyes seem to fracture into hundreds of smaller eyes and then in a blink revert back to their sky blue color cradled in a cloud of white.

“Impressive, but the role of freak of nature has obviously been filled by me.” Menthos states shifting his hips

“The only good goblins are ones twisting on me spit of hate seasoned with the tears of the fallen.” The man answers

“Maybe you’ll do, you’ll have to pass the physical exam along with a rectal exam and Doctor Doopa is out right now. When he gets here I’ll let you know. Until then you can make yourself useful and go mortar something.” Menthos dismisses the elf

“Certainly, I am wizened for having met the Menthos Lyptus of my cud. I am Eeyore of the Apaxvn* tribe.” Eeyore introduces himself formally

“E or what?” Menthos asks

“Excuse me?” Eeyore asks

“E or what? F? Or G?” Menthos states, “Wait, orgy? Heh, I like you already.” Menthos answers

Two days of wall work later and Haimish along with Doopa and the rangers return minus Xanthos

“Xanthos will not be returning for a while.” Haimish relates the Catalan trip

“Awe, and here I was hoping this new guy I met could kill, I mean meet him.” Menthos answers

Menthos introduces Eeyore to Haimish and Doopa as a large eagle quickly descends winding around the pyromancer’s tower. Xanthos transforms back into his elven form and interjects himself into the conversation.

“Hledra’s found allies, frost giants move on this keep. They lie only a day travel to the north amid a cold I have never experienced or wish to recount. I fear my vengeance will need held until these foes have been dealt with.” Xanthos states



* astute readers may find out his secret before the story hour reveals it   *


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Icy grip of death*

“Shouldn’t we get the horses?” Haimish asked

“Unnecessary, I’ve already dug us a tunnel to crawl through. It opens in the center of their encampment. The element of surprise will give us an advantage.” Xanthos answers

“That depends, how many giants were there?” Menthos inquires

“At least four, with a couple of dire bears as well.” Xanthos responds

“What? You’ve got to be joking. There’s no way we even come close to taking them out.” Menthos argues

“They have magic, lots of it.” Xanthos answers

Menthos’ countenance changes to meekness as he utters a weak “so?”

“I believe your participation has just been bought.” Xanthos replies

“I’ve made it no secret that I prostitute myself at the corner of magic and power avenues, and you sir are speaking my language.” Menthos relates

“Doopa not yet fight blue giants of tall mountains, Doopa look forward to adding to notches on belt.” The ogre advises

“Is that was those are for?” Menthos inquires

“Yes.” Doopa replies

“Huh?” Menthos says looking at his own belt

“Wow, you have lots of kills.” Doopa says admiring Menthos’ belt

“No, not really are notches are for different things.” Menthos answers

“Doopa like to learn taxi, taxa, texer; learn to mount heads of kills on wall.  You do that?” The barbarian asks

“I’ve mounted plenty of things on the wall and most of them did have heads.” Menthos answers

“Okay, time to go.” Haimish interjects before the story gets even worse

“Wow, scary man teach Doopa?” The ogre asks of Menthos

“No! We are not going there, get moving.” Haimish demands

“Are you verifiably teifling? It would seem to me that you are more satyr than humanoid, perhaps there is a goat in your past?” Eeyore observes

“Ha, very funny. You got me there, say you smoke? I got these really nice cigars from Bulwark.” Menthos offers

“Thanks.” Eeyore says wearily before accepting the gift from the warlock

“Here.” Menthos offers, igniting a tinder twig and then lighting the cigar with it. 

The group exits the keep and then circles around to the north side of the keep to begin their trek into the early winter, the group was easy to spot form the ramparts as Eeyore became a walking chimney as the group began assailing the southern reaches of the Majestics. Before long, Doopa was carrying the passed out Eeyore over his shoulder as the ranger’s white tiger growled softly at Menthos as it walked alongside of Doopa next to Eeyore.

Xanthos quickly located his hidden tunnel entrance and ushered the rest of the party into the hole. Doopa made Menthos drag Eeyore along in the rear of the party line, this made the going even slower as Doopa just barely fit inside the tunnel and several times thought he had become stuck in the tunnel. The party pushed their way for several miles, along the way Xanthos widened the tunnel so that Doopa could fit better and their tempo could increase.

The party realized at once when they had gotten close, even ten feet below the surface it was noticeably colder as Xanthos led them a few hundred feet further and stopped.

“Above is the giant encampment, a convincing show of might should drive them off. I want these removed so as to isolate Hledra within itself, no need to have giants hanging around while I’m trying to wrench the orc’s brain out through his anus.” Xanthos stated

“What a way to get your hands dirty.” Menthos replied

“That’s your plan, jump up through a gopher hole and yell, surprise like we’re jumping out of a cake with snow icing?” Haimish asks

“Your fear of the giants is understandable however misplaced, what you should fear more is defeat. The lives of thousands of sentient creatures, some you do not even know they exist are at stake here. For us to fail would be catastrophic to this ecosystem.” Eeyore explains

“I don’t fear defeat, I lose all the time and if I lose here I’ll just blame you and have you hunted down and your internal organs used to spice up a mutton sandwich for a carnivorous formorian.” Menthos responds

“You are a very disturbed individual, though I suppose with a gibbering mouther and a jackass for parents your density was doomed to wind up stirring the cesspool of nonconformity.” Eeyore replies

“Get a room you guys.” Haimish interjects

Xanthos excavates the ten feet to the surface and once breeching the ground and reaching the snow he slows down and slowly removes the snow. Steam rises from the bodies below him as he works to make the opening stable enough to allow them to exit and not fill in the hole with surrounding snow. Once done he peeks his head above the snow and spies three giants, one sleeping and two others are talking near an enormous tree that is covered in ice. Two dire bears are resting quietly near the sleeping giant.

Xanthos communicates the giant’s positions above to the party, Haimish nods and turns himself invisible and slips up the hole past Xanthos and onto the snow field above. Instantly shivering, Haimish fights off the cold and the urge to breathe trying not to give away his position but the small floating steam mephit-like breath coming from his mouth. Haimish reaches the sleeping giant as Doopa exits the hole with a flurry.

“Surprise! Doopa here for cake!” The ogre shouts

The two awake giants immediately turn and head for Doopa who is streaking across the snow field towards the east side of the valley. Xanthos exits next and heads out to help Haimish with his giant and the dire bears. Menthos and Eeyore remain in the hole waiting to see how well the plan goes off before tipping the giants to the fact that there are more enemies to battle. 

Xanthos and Haimish savagely tear into the sleeping frost giant; the large cold man barely has enough time to rouse himself before his eyes close again forever. The sounds of battle stir the bears to action and they begin to charge towards the bard and shifter. Doopa’s chase to get the two awake giants away from their encampment works too well as the giants figure out Doopa’s plan before he does and they surround the barbarian before he can reach the valley wall. Surrounded a mere fifty feet from the hole, Doopa screams for his battle rage to take him to a painless place of an ogre smackdown paradise. Eeyore sees Doopa get surround and he rushes out of the hole along with his tiger to help the flanked ogre by flanking a giant of their own.

Menthos fires the occasional eldritch blast from his place of relative safety while observing the battle from the hole. The dire bears prove to be a much tougher encounter than a sleeping giant; they’ve managed to keep Xanthos and Haimish on the defensive. However the bard and shifter managed to get the bears turned around so that if they had to make run for it back to the hole they could do so without having to go through the bears to do it. While it was tense for a few moments, the party was clearly beating back the threat at this point and Menthos even halted his ranged support in order to watch the festivities from the hole.

Movement off the corner of his eye caught his attention; the tree seemed to shake a little, quickly turning on his warlock ability to see the unseen he stared out at the gigantic tree. The more he stared, the more he realized it seemed out of place for this valley, no other vegetation could be seen except for this tree and as quickly as the cold had descended there should be some clues here to plant life other than this tree. His supernatural sight saw nothing further than what his normal vision had detected. He decided the tree was a curiosity and nothing more and turned his attention back to the battles when the storm of ice blanketed the area.

Razor-sharp shards of water shredded the combatants. The dire bears were done in by this new threat; one of the remaining giants also fell to the assault, as did Eeyore. Doopa and the last giant staggered away from their engagement bloodied and confused.

“What was that?” Xanthos shouted

“I didn’t see. The weird guy is down though.” Menthos shouts back from his hole

Haimish and Xanthos rush to Doopa and Eeyore’s side as loud cracking sounds echoed off the valley walls, amplified by the falling snow the sound was nearly deafening. 

“Enough of this, enough of mocking my plans!” a low noise that sounded almost like an intelligible friction noise.

“Who are you? The orc? Show yourself so that I may finish what you could not!” Xanthos shouts

“Xanthos, help me with Eeyore first.” Haimish huffed as he hauled the dying elf up and propped him against the downed giant. 

A thunderous roar came from the tree as it hefted itself out of the snow and a huge root collection formed itself into a leg and foot as the thing stepped towards the party.

“Great tree spirit, we mean you no harm, we are here to stop these interlopers.” Xanthos apologizes 

“It is you who are going to be stopped.” The treant answers

The tree shakes and more shards tear through the falling snow and slice across the battlefield. Haimish quickly dives onto Eeyore, while shoving a minor healing spell into the ranger, to protect him from the shards. Haimish’s back is torn to ribbons, his chain shirt offering no protection against the attack. Doopa falters as well slamming into the snow face first, his back studded with melting ice debris. Menthos was protected again this time from the attack, he peered out over to the party and watched as Xanthos tried to gather up Doopa as Haimish rolled off of Eeyore in obvious pain.

“Retreat!” Xanthos shouted 

“There is no place for you to hide!” The treant answers

“Run to the hole now!” Menthos shouts as he leaps from the hole and intercedes himself between the party and the treant.

“I do not need a stationary target to make your sap drain away!” The treant calls and begins to shake

Menthos reaches into his pouch and pulls out the fire opal Statinisor gave him when they left Highcastle, the teifling throws the gem at the ice treant just as he sees the ice shards begin to stir loose from the treant’s branches. 

Xanthos shoves Doopa through the hole and turns to help Haimish load Eeyore into it; his tiger companion had already fled inside the hole ahead of Doopa.

“Hurry!” Xanthos shouts expecting the cloud of icicles to hit any second.

The gem struck the tree just prior to it’s assault. The resulting explosion threw Menthos back off his feet a good ten feet and knocked over Xanthos and Haimish causing Eeyore to get dumped into the hole on his head. The heat from the fire melted everything within forty feet including the wax seals on Menthos’ potions. Deafened by the blast Menthos didn’t hear Xanthos shouting for him until after he saw the tree still stood, blackened and scarred but alive nonetheless.

The treant bellowed in pain and a new sound reverberated across the valley.

“Menthos!” Xanthos yelled for the fifth time, this time the warlock heard him and turned his head back to the hole.

Xanthos watches as Menthos pushed himself off the snow and stumble for towards the escape hole. Behind the teifling the treant agonized in pain and retreated back to it’s starting position, as it retreated and got smaller relative to Xanthos’ perception, a new figure seemed to rise in the background behind the treat. Cylindrical in shape the pillar rose to a height of thirty feet before bending at the top. A huge tooth filled maw pointed it’s hunger at the party.

“Frost worm! Run!” Xanthos shouted fear cracking his voice


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> * astute readers may find out his secret before the story hour reveals it   *





I guess I'm not too astute today.  :\ 



> Cylindrical in shape the pillar rose to a height of thirty feet before bending at the top. A huge tooth filled maw pointed it’s hunger at the party.
> 
> “Frost worm! Run!”




Ironically, I just threw a Frost Worm at my group too. It's breath weapon was pretty nasty, taking one of my guys from full health to -5 in a single round, but when your party includes a PC who can breathe fire and your Worm has fire vulnerability... the conclusion is sort of foregone.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> I guess I'm not too astute today.  :\
> 
> 
> 
> Ironically, I just threw a Frost Worm at my group too. It's breath weapon was pretty nasty, taking one of my guys from full health to -5 in a single round, but when your party includes a PC who can breathe fire and your Worm has fire vulnerability... the conclusion is sort of foregone.





Apaxvn is a Greek term, I guess astute would be the wrong terminology, maybe "resourceful readers" would be better.   

Actually it's not frost worm, but you could see why Xanthos would think so. (although it is a worm....)


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Apaxvn is a Greek term, I guess astute would be the wrong terminology, maybe "resourceful readers" would be better.




I guess I'm not all that resourceful either. Even with that nudge in the right direction, I come up wanting. My mad googling ain't all that, it would seem.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> I guess I'm not all that resourceful either. Even with that nudge in the right direction, I come up wanting. My mad googling ain't all that, it would seem.




You're right, I used Babel Fish for the translation and it won't go backwards compatible.  :\ 

So those of you who were stumped by what this term means, here's the spoiler:







spider


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Lost and Found*

The ice tree smirks as the grey shadowy pillar writhes and falls upon the freshly fallen snow. A thunderous grinding sound echoes off the walls of the valley as the gigantic worm makes its way across the snow. The remaining frost giant whips a rock at the hole's opening, missing Menthos but kicking up a cloud of snow and ice. 

Haimish revives Doopa to consciousness and turns back to the rest of the party, “Doopa and I will get Eeyore back to Kindoras, can you two slow down the frost worm?”

Xanthos yells back, “I got this!” 

Menthos tries to clear his eyes of debris and feels Xanthos shift next to him into something burning hot and disappear into the rock wall behind him. Still partially blinded Menthos yells out for Haimish, “Hold up, I’m coming!”

Menthos drops to the floor of the tunnel as Haimish finishes his _haste_ spell. Doopa grabs Eeyore and the group races back towards Kindoras.

The worm hurtles itself into the ground around the hole and begins following the group, Xanthos circles back on his tunnel and drives his drill shaped head into the white worm’s skin. Steam immediately escapes from the blistering wound; Xanthos smells not burning worm however, but burnt decaying flesh. Transforming into a pixie Xanthos sees that the expected bleeding of the wound is not occurring; instead he spies the blackened flesh of frostbite.

“This isn’t a frost worm at all; it’s an undead purple worm.” Xanthos says aloud

Rolling it’s body so the wound is on top as it glides through the earth, the worm lets out a earsplitting trill. The sound pierces Xanthos’ nervous system and the paralyzed pixie drops to the ground behind the worm like discarded trash.

“We’re losing it.” Menthos says

“Maybe, but worm not lose us.” Doopa states 

“We’re leading the worm right back to Kindoras!” Haimish exclaimed realizing what Doopa had clarified for Menthos

“We’ll kill it there then!” Menthos shouted back

“Are you crazy?” Haimish asks

“Yes, but that’s hardly common knowledge is it?” Menthos answers

The part speeds it’s way back to Kindoras, emerging from the ground and finishing the last two miles in a dead sprint. Guards along the ramparts spy the group running for the keep and as the party nears the wall the guards make out, “lower ropes, hurry!”

Ropes are thrown over the wall initially until Gorn reaches the wall to investigate. Two ropes are retracted by the time the party reaches the wall. Doopa grabs one of the remaining two ropes and begins to haul himself, with Eeyore slung over his shoulder, up the wall. Haimish and Menthos grab the other rope and begin to scale the wall as well. Once the heroes reach the top and argument ensues between them and Gorn. Realizing they don’t have time for this, Menthos shoves Doopa at the captain and tells the ogre to deal with Gorn. He then grabs Haimish’s arm and drags him away from the war of words.

“What?” Haimish inquires

“I need you to keep the locals distracted while the worm is dealt with.” Menthos tells the bard

“What are you going to do?” Haimish asks

“I’m going to go roast some nuts.” Menthos answers and pushes Haimish towards the gate of the keep.

Menthos turns and heads to Aleena’s quarters 

Gorn and Doopa begin shoving each other as the worm erupts from the ground and rises in the evening sky high enough to fill the sky that normally brightens up the northern pass. The two sparring men quickly shove off each other. Gorn shouts out a call to arms as Doopa leaps from the ramparts and into the courtyard below.

Menthos kicks Aleena’s door in and announces the keep is under attack, “Where are the pyromancers?” 

“They’re cowering in their room, something about the prophecy coming to pass.” Aleena answers

“Ugh, I don’t have time for this.” Menthos sighs and runs off to the priests’ rooms 

Menthos finds the five priests huddled around a pool of molten slag starring blankly at it’s surface.

“You guys need to get out and man the tower, prove your worth to Kador.” Menthos demands

None of the priests even flinch

“Hey! Are you guys deaf? Get out there and get your butts in gear before I throw you in front of the rampaging worm myself!” Menthos commands again

“Don’t you see it? Even now the pool solidifies, the cold creeps along with same force of a glacier. The only winners in this fight are the steam mephitis.” A pyromancer answers

Beyond frustrated, Menthos utters a dark word as if that were the only logical response in this situation. Four of the priests turn their eyes to the now bestial looking teifling.

“Get up there and fry that worm or I will personally escort you to the plane of vacuum where you can suck on your own time.” Menthos orders

The four priests who turned towards the warlock race out into the courtyard and fly up to their posts atop their pentacle tower in the center of the keep.

Haimish grabs the three barbarian skalds he has met in the keep and walks them up to the gate as well, telling them that they have an important duty and the fate of the keep is in their hands. At first skeptical, the skalds are swayed after Haimish promises the story of a lifetime to those who cooperate and survive the task.

The bards set about corralling as many of the non-combative residents of the keep as possible to congregate near the keep’s gate, they then break into a vaudeville routine replete with cream pies, and amateur magic tricks. They crowd becomes fascinated with the act and turn their backs on the chaos quickly boiling up behind them. 

The ground quakes as the massive worm plunges down upon the northern wall, collapsing it and crushing a dozen of the keep’s barbarian guards. Doopa rushes forward and bounces his club off the worm’s hide to seemingly no effect. Disheartened, Doopa shrugs off Eeyore’s helpless body and swings again, this time with two hands, however the result is the same.

The pyromancers begin unleashing _searing lights _ and _fireballs_ at Orcus’ tapeworm scorching it’s freeze dried flesh, the many bolts and arrows from the keep’s guards however merely serve to create a trip hazard in the courtyard as none of them succeed on penetrating the worm’s hide. 

Menthos rushes to the remaining pyromancer and grabbing his wrists, forcibly turns the priest away from the pool, “You have a job to do, get up there and do it!” Menthos shouts shoving the pyromancer across the floor and sending him skidding towards the door. 

“The sun dims in the icy grip of the one who is created in the presence of light. Your whole existence will come down to a single thought frozen in a place so cold emotions are cultivated to create ice sculptures of pure rage.” The pyromancer responds

“You’ve gone mad starring at that thing, now I’m only going to give you to the count of three before I put the fear of drowning in you.” Menthos replies

“Go ahead, I’m ready. The more soldiers Kador has the less likely he will be to abandon this cold place in space.” The priest answers

Realizing the intimidation wasn’t going anywhere; Menthos turns to leave the room. While passing by the pyromancer, the warlock kicks the priests in the jaw, “Pathetic, I’ve seen matches put up a better fight against the cold than you.”

“You mock me now, you do that while you can, for it will be I who is laughing at your frozen face contorted in a spastic conformity to the realization I was right all along.” The pyromancer shouts back

“You prophets are all the same, preaching fear and doom until you have every right to be afraid and then use that as an excuse to point out your own righteousness. I don’t live by your rules, nor do I wish to conform to them, I go out there and face my own fear and use it to shape my own destiny, not the one some drunken crazed grimlock saw fit to dictate to a magmin so that thousands of years later you could claim the end was coming as it has been for thousands of years.” Menthos ends his speech by eldritch blasting the pyromancer back towards the pool.

“Go look into your future and see Kador using you as seasoning for a soul kabob.” Menthos advises

Aleena joins Doopa in wasting their efforts on the undead hide of the worm, Haimish and the skalds move on to the comedy portion of their show. Gorn cuts off the archers from wasting anymore time on the worm and instead has them direct their attentions out to the north in case anything follows the worm into the keep.

As Menthos returns to the courtyard, the worm is returned to it’s eternal rest by a _fireball_. Doopa slumps against the burning carcass, trying to catch his breath. The pyromancers come down from their tower and are congratulated by Aleena and Gorn as saving the keep from certain disaster. Haimish and the skalds go another ten minutes of material before stopping and rejoining their respective groups. 

Xanthos drifts into the keep several minutes later battered and bruised and looking rundown. The shifter glides down and states the party needs to come up with a better plan and that after he cleans up a bit they need to work that better plan out. Menthos asks Aleena to do a sending to Statinisor for him, specific instructions to be given after Xanthos blows his steam off. Eeyore is dragged off with the injured to be dealt with as needed in a makeshift infirmary.

An hour later Xanthos collects each of the party members and starts off the planning session, “We’ve been killing things for far too long to be doing it like a bunch of amateurs. Our reconnaissance is nonexistent; our teamwork is like an iron golem mounted on a giant rust monster.” 

“What are you saying?” Haimish inquires

“Doopa not quit you!” The ogre speaks up

“We’re being beaten by better tactics, better planning, and better teamwork. If Hledra is to suffer a humiliating rout that causes that city to implode upon the vacuum of decapitated egos then we’re going to have to do it better than them, and for longer than we have been.” Xanthos explains

“Seems to me like the scouting out of the worm was your fault, I would think you would’ve noticed something that big laying around.” Menthos scoffs

“The tree summoned it; I could not have anticipated such a maneuver.” Xanthos answers

“Summoned it? Who summons an undead purple worm? That’s ridiculous.” Menthos replies

“Regardless of the current state of your own reality, I cannot not retro-change the aforementioned encounter to eliminate the presence of a worm of decay.” Xanthos responds

“Why we not chop tree down?” Doopa asks

“That’s crazy talk; you can’t chop a treant down.” Haimish argues

“That’s not crazy talk, this is crazy talk: A Christmas Tree summoned the mile long worm of death. Sounds like the world’s largest bottle of Holiday Tequila.” Menthos responds

“If you are finished, I will continue.” Xanthos states

“Oh please do, I want to hurry up and get to the part where we decorate the tree and watch the skies for flying pigs and my butt shoots forth a barrel of monkeys for your enjoyment.” Menthos replies

“You guys should stop worry about what your enemies plot to do to you, and start making them worry when you’ll attack next.” A recuperated Eeyore suggested

“Sound reasoning, but we can’t get near Hledra without bring about the ire of the orc warlord and the ogre mage.” Haimish answers

“Start smaller, head back out and deal with the tree now while it’s licking it’s wounds.” Eeyore advises

The group ponders this statement as Menthos leaves them to go convene with Aleena, reaching her quarters he has her help him pare down his message so it will all fit and be intelligible at the same time.

_Please send me three more Opals; they’ll come in handy indeed. Clever man to know I would need them. I can send back other gifts._ 

“Here, take this. It’ll clear up your complexion problem. Whatever you said to third pentacle must have been poignant; he’s leaving to return to Highcastle in the morning to face execution for dereliction of duty.” Aleena reports

A scream pierces the relative calm of the evening. Menthos and Aleena race out to the courtyard to find the source of the commotion. Most of the keep has gathered around the side of the barracks looking forlorn at the ground. The rest of the party arrives just prior to Aleena and Menthos, they watch as smoky colored words form out of the shadows themselves.

*I can strike from anywhere*

The body of a human lies naked and flayed upon the snow, his body burnt a dark dusk color, his hair black and almost insubstantial. Xanthos approaches the body, as he does the words dissipate upon an unseen breeze. Looking down at the body, a pang of recognition glances across Xanthos’ memories and he realizes who he's looking at.

“Kessen?” Xanthos says aloud

The body laughs tragically, starting off high and loud and trailing off low and soft. Kessen’s eyes are bottom pits that seem to give Xanthos the feeling of falling.

“You. Cast _speak with the dead_.” Xanthos commands Aleena

Aleena is startled by the demand from the shifter and looks around at the faces of her charges, wondering if standing up to this insolence would prove beneficial or detrimental to her control of the keep. In the end she decides that allaying the fears of the keep would be more prudent. The high priest begins her casting only to end it frustrated.

“His soul no longer exists in the multiverse, it’s been destroyed I cannot contact it.” Aleena explains

“What about resurrection?” Xanthos inquires

“It would be useless as well, there’s no soul to put back in there. We would wind up with an uncontrollable golem at best or gate in a demon or something from the far realm at worst.” Aleena answers

The frustration showed across Xanthos’ face, he needed answers and he kept getting questions and these people here were only aggravating the issue.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> The body of a human lies naked and flayed upon the snow, his body burnt a dark dusk color, his hair black and almost insubstantial. Xanthos approaches the body, as he does the words dissipate upon an unseen breeze. Looking down at the body, a pang of recognition glances across Xanthos’ memories and he realizes who he's looking at.
> 
> “Kessen?” Xanthos says aloud




Nice.

 

And I really do feel for Xanthos; I'd be pulling my hair out with these guys. Laughing all the while, mind you.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Nice.
> 
> 
> 
> And I really do feel for Xanthos; I'd be pulling my hair out with these guys. Laughing all the while, mind you.





It gets worse, wait until the party finally gets a cleric to join them.... or when Menthos' evil nature comes out of the closet.... or when Xanthos finds his original heart still beats....


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*The river card is played*

The keep remains on edge and alert, ever watchful of the mountain range to the north and the rocky hills to the east, expecting an attack at any moment. Xanthos threw himself into repairing the collapsed portion of the north wall; he along with Doopa did most of the heavy lifting in lieu of winches. 

Haimish inspired courage and competence in the makeshift masons as they repaired the wall to their best efforts. Eeyore retreated to ponder who, what, why, and how Kessen’s body was dumped in the middle of the keep; an enemy that can seemingly reach anywhere would be a dangerous opponent indeed. 

Aleena returned to Menthos within a few hours with Statinisor’s reply to the warlock’s request for additional firepower to combat the cold creatures they had faced:

_“Give the bag and it’s contents to Thruvimhurax the Cunning, I will send two Opals with a man baring the sign of distress, he will not know who he is meeting so you must intercept him prior to the Pentacles doing so.” _ 

“What’s the sign of distress?” Menthos asked

Aleena winced, but retrieved a holly branch from her dresser drawer. Withdrawing a small knife from her bodice, she proceeded to strip the branch. After completing that she held the branch out as if dowsing for water, “Then you would ask if had lost my way, to which I would reply yes”.

“Hokey, and why would I need to keep it from the pentacles?” Menthos asked

“Because they would be faith bound to assist the man and would find the opals and the messenger may assume these are the people he is to deliver to.” Aleena answered

“Who is Thruvimhurax the Cunning?” Menthos asked

“I do not know that name, perhaps you could check with your bard friend?” Aleena responds

Menthos narrowed his eyes and pondered the reply for a moment, wondering silently about traitors within Kador’s ranks. He pushes that thought to the back of his mind for the moment, and excuses himself to go find Gorn.

“Ya want me ta wat?” Gorn replies

“Anyone new, I don’t care if it’s a corpse, you come find me regardless of what I’m doing and I’ll check them out first.” Menthos instructs

“I ain’t givin’ control o’er the security of dis keep to you.” Gorn argues

“You won’t be you’d be adding an extra layer of protection. Me.” Menthos advises

“Dat ain’t protection, dats an invitation to have dis keep run o’er wit little yous.” Gorn objects

“Look old man, I don’t care if I have to camp out on your ass to make this happen, so we can do this benignly or we can do this by me giving you the worst case of hemorrhoids you’ve ever scratched. What’s it going to be?” Menthos replies

“Do’na be threaten me, I got me eye on ya. I been watchin’ ya, you ain’t the only one wif secrets.” Gorn answers

“Yeah? Well I don’t care that you still sleep with your binky, or that you shave your ass hair with a pair of goat dentures. That still won’t detract from me crawling up inside you and squatting until you comply with this order, you have a problem with it, you go talk to Aleena.” Menthos responds

Gorn snorts his disapproval and heads off to find Aleena. Menthos spotted him about ten minutes later, bursting through the inner tower door, fuming with rage and hell bent on ruining the warlock’s day. Menthos decided to spend the rest of the afternoon in Aleena’s bed, a place Gorn wouldn’t dare look for him. So Menthos snuck around the assembled masons rebuilding the north wall and made it back inside the priest’s quarters before he was spotted. 

Two days passed and the wall had been repaired, the town was even more on edge fearing the lull in scouting parties and no frost giant attack only meant the actual attack would be far worse the longer they made the keep wait to battle them. That night it began to snow heavily, shouts of terror and a call to arms rung out over the keep at three in the morning. Someone along the northern battlements had spotted movement against the black background. When seconds turned to minutes which then began an hour, the keep relaxed a little.

“There’s going to be six to eight feet of snow in the keep by morning at this rate.” Xanthos stated

“Oh no.” Gorn gasped

“What?” Haimish inquired

“They’re going to bury us in snow and then pick us off one by one as we’d be unable to fight effectively in waist high snow.” Eeyore answered

“Well the snow’s not magical.” Menthos states, using his warlock ability to detect magical auras.

“Yes, but that doesn’t mean this small storm didn’t grow to huge size because of the presence of the ice treant, it could be exasperating the problem by aggravating the cold and winds.” Xanthos answered. 

“Eh, a couple of firestorms centered on the clouds above will fix the problem.” Menthos answers

“Fix what problem? Human habitation here? Because all you would do is create falling globs of water that would freeze and crush those below.” Xanthos replies

“How’s that different from eight feet of snow on top of you? You lack the vision to see through this problem.” Menthos retorts

“If genocide is what you want there are more effective ways that wouldn’t leave survivors. If getting rid of the snow is your concern then you’re going about it the wrong way. Either way you’re a self-centered moron.” Xanthos replies

“What are some of those no survivor ways you speak of? I find your assertions intriguing and I wish to subscribe to your plot device.” Menthos answers

“I’m going to go scout out the giant’s camp and see what they’re doing, maybe we can get a better idea of what they may be planning.” Xanthos advised

“What should we be doing here?” Eeyore inquired

“Be vigilant.” Xanthos answers

“Doopa try that once, get put in jail.” The ogre replies

“He meant keep an eye open, keep a look out for anything, not vigilante.” Haimish explains

“Oh, but Doopa can’t take eye out of head.” The barbarian states

“I think we should wait.” Menthos advises

“Why? Looking for a way out?” Xanthos accuses

“No, I’ll just be better equipped to handle the ice tree in a couple more days.” Menthos answers

“Why’s that?” Eeyore inquires

“I’m not going to explain it to ranger, you wouldn’t understand. I think Xanthos should scout out the giant’s camp and Hledra and then we’ll formulate our physical response.” Menthos offers

“Is your attention span so bad that you can’t even pay attention to your own conversations? Is that not what I just proposed?” Xanthos asked exasperated

“No, you proposed scouting the giant’s camp, I added Hledra in there, making it a completely new request.” Menthos says proudly

Xanthos shakes his head in disbelief as he transforms into an eagle and soars into the falling snow, disappearing into the clouds. He heads north and quickly covers the ground to the giant’s former camp. The only thing remaining is a brilliantly glowing “door” in the middle of the valley, no bodies, no tree, no sign of life. Swopping in low for a better look, Xanthos feels the cold protection he placed on himself failing, which confuses the shifter as he should still have several minutes left. The closer he gets to the glowing monolithic structure, the colder he gets, Xanthos veers off and flies parallel to the thing and as he passes it, he realizes that it’s a two dimensional gate. 

Xanthos circles the valley one last time before heading off to scout out Hledra, satisfied that he had discovered why this autumn storm packed the force of the heart of winter, Xanthos headed east. Reaching the enemy city, Xanthos noted it was snowing their as well. Although he failed to locate the orc or the ogre mage he did spot several dozen kobolds scurrying back and forth from a number of buildings. After a few more minutes, Xanthos turned and headed back to Kindoras.

Gorn awoke every healthy body he could and had makeshift shovels passed out to them, most comprised of broken shields and half of breastplates that were no longer serviceable. For the next four hours the keep’s residents kept themselves from getting buried, when the first signs that the storm was relenting the keep rejoiced and Haimish broke into a tearful rendition of “Happy Birthday to me” that seemed to distract the workers from their burning muscles and aching backs.

Around noon when the clouds had broken and a freezing sun peeked out through the clouds Gorn sent half of the keep back to bed to rest. Haimish, Doopa, and Eeyore decided to stay up and help with various activities. Menthos however took leave and went back to bed, but not before reminding Gorn to come get him if any strangers ask for permission to gain entrance to the keep.

Menthos fell back asleep easily and drifted off into a deep slumber, soon after the nightmare began. Menthos’ dream of owning his own harem was ripped to scrap by cold, black, icy claws. Forcing his dream to the sides of his consciousness, the claws scraped against his will burning his very soul. Two small points of light appeared in the darkness beyond the claws, one blue and the other red, both twinkling and becoming brighter.

Then the voice came, “Antithesis to you I am, born of the remnants of the first to be called by the god you suffer for. My power is limited only by the dream of it I have yet to have; I exist across your life like a stain of habit. You wish to find me? You will have to cease looking where you expect answers; I will be here waiting for you, taunting you, playing with you as a child plays with a cricket. One by one your limbs will fall off, your song will stop and you’ll be left there undulating in your own visceral mass. Waiting for me to end your suffering, for that is what I do, that is what I am. The end to your suffering under a false pretense.” 

Menthos woke with a start, to say he was cold would be an understatement, he could see his heavy breath in the air in front of him. He swung his legs over and readies himself to spring from his bed, only to feel a searing pain in his feet. Looking down he found his toes white with frost and his toenails blue and dying. Limping his way down the hallway to Aleena’s door, he entered to find the priest bent over attending to her own feet colored the same as the warlock’s. A knowing glanced passed before them and Menthos hobbled his way to a chair to await his turn at the healing touch.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*That's just cold*

Xanthos quickly located Doopa as he flew into the keep, transforming back into an elf and motioning the ogre over in the same movement. 

“I have a plan; I am going to gain entry into Hledra by becoming an overburdened horse. The leaders should add me to the stables allowing me a greater chance to observe the city undetected.” Xanthos explains

“Uh, ok. You need Doopa to rescue you?” Doopa inquires

“No, I’m going to need to make my presentation as perfect as possible, so in that regards I need you to saddle up on my back as I gallop as hard as I can for as long as my body holds up, this will make my ruse as a tired horse much more believable.” Xanthos answers

“Ok, Doopa likes rides. Does Xanthos ride crash in the water?” Doopa asks excitedly

“I do not believe I will have time to indulge your childhood regressions.” Xanthos replies

As Aleena worked the healing magic over the soles of Menthos’ feet, the door to the room is thrust open as a heavily breathing Doopa bull rushes into the room.

“What’s the matter?” Menthos almost demands as he shoots straight up into a standing position expecting the news of an attack.

“Xanthos want Doopa to ride him hard for practice.” The ogre restates

Good thing Menthos wasn’t drinking anything at that moment, it would have been shellacked over the walls, “What?” Menthos managed to get out between giggles.

“Doopa will ride Xanthos so hard horse-man will collapse.” Doopa reiterated

“Do I need to buy tickets for the mule show, or do I get a VIP seat?” Menthos asks

“Doopa not know why dirty elf need ticket to watch Doopa mount Xanthos.” The ogre explains

“Doopa, my naïve lumberjack, has it ever occurred to you that your fate may be to bring an alternative lifestyle to the ogres of the Cloudwalls?” Menthos asks

“Doopa already planning on bringing balanced diet to clan, eating bugs and perytons give ogres very much bad gas.” Doopa answers

Menthos follows Doopa out into the courtyard where an impatient Xanthos waits to get going.

“I told you not to tell that one anything, he does not need to be privy to my plan.” Xanthos states

“Well, I’m glad he did. At first I was skeptical that this whole business of him riding you hard until you collapsed was just a ploy to get some quality time in with Doopa.” Menthos says

“What’s the problem guys?” Haimish shows up to the conversation

“I am going to infiltrate Hledra and bring back the heart of the orc warlord as payment for the theft of my own.” Xanthos elaborates

“I don’t think having sex with an ogre is going to accomplish that or make them throw open the gates of the city ahead of your arrival.” Menthos counters

“What? What gave you the notion that this was in any way not a reconnaissance mission?” Xanthos says over the stunned silence from Haimish and Doopa

 “Okay, looks like I need to go something about a song or something other than stand here with you people here, now.” Haimish gets out while backing away and whistling a tune.

“Hey, what you want to charm Doopa for is your own business, but at least you could use better code words than; take my out into the woods and rock my world.” Menthos suggests

“I shall endeavor to remember that tip when I return to increase your body’s mineral content through a piercing application of my sword.” Xanthos states and transforms into a horse  

Doopa and Xanthos are gone for most of the day, the rest of the party help provide maintenance around the keep. As night begins to creep across the Majestics, Xanthos and Doopa return with the ogre carrying an extremely exhausted Xanthos slung over his shoulder. Xanthos forced himself to lean up and whisper in Doopa’s ear, which caused Doopa to alter his path and avoid Menthos as they walked through the courtyard of the keep.

Xanthos left the next morning far ahead of sunrise and flew to within a mile of Hledra, at the time Xanthos saw the night sky clearly and thought nothing of it. Transforming into a tired and abused horse, Xanthos made his way closer and closer to the enemy. Ascending the final hill before Hledra would come into view, Xanthos thought about the torment he would allow the orc to feel before quickly ending his life. These thoughts fueled Xanthos and distracted him as he crested the hill and limped into the valley below. 

The shacks and hovels of Hledra’s kobold residents passed by the preoccupied Xanthos without so much a protest of his presence. It wasn’t until Xanthos stood before Hledra’s tower keep that he thought it odd he had seen nor heard anyone or anything. Turning back he noted there were no fires burning in the kobold’s town, and then remembering the night sky had been clear. Xanthos panicked and visualized the entire city sacking Kindoras Keep; guilt wracked his mind as he “saw” Haimish and Doopa ripped to shreds without Xanthos there to protect them.

Xanthos returns to avian form and without regard to his safety flies back to Kindoras as quickly as his wings and the tailwind take him. Keeping his attention split between the horizon and the ground below him, Xanthos searches for evidence that a massive army trudged through the heavy snow on its way to Kindoras. Finding evidence of that lacking, Xanthos worried that Hledra may have come down from the Majestics with their frost giant pals and attacked from that direction. Xanthos shifted his flight plan and headed into the Majestics to look for passage of Hledra along that route. 

Xanthos returned to the valley where they defeated the previous frost giant force and found that the ice gate was still functioning and illuminated its surrounding cliff walls in a pale blue glow, making them seem as enormous icebergs. Still there was no evidence that Hledra advanced on Kindoras from this direction either. Confused but anxious, Xanthos sped back to Kindoras hoping that it still stood. He found it exactly as he left it.

“That’s odd; I wonder where they all went. Did you get into the castle at all?” Haimish inquired

“No, I only saw the kobolds residences were empty and flew back here.” Xanthos answered

“Looks like Hledra didn’t want your impression of used meat, maybe you should try again as a giant carrot?” Menthos offers

“We should leave immediately and find them. An army that can seemingly disappear over the span of a couple days is alarming. Also disturbing is the inference that Hledra abandoned their city for another destination.” Eeyore interjects

“Wherever they went it wasn’t west.” Xanthos answers

“Doopa say they went down.” The ogre states while pointing at the ground beneath him

“The devils; lure an army into thinking they’d fled and then when the occupying force is asleep they burst from the ground like a pustule to overwhelm them and destroy them before they even realize what happened.” Xanthos imagines, clenching his fist and drawing his lips taunt.

“You guys are all paranoid; they probably went to their winter vacation spots along the Tarantis coast. Better fishing there this time of year.” Menthos throws in for consideration

“Maybe the ice gate teleported the whole army somewhere? Maybe it allows them to attack at long range and we caught them away from home?” Haimish postulates

“That’s a solution I had not considered, perhaps a trek back to the ice tree’s valley is in order?” Xanthos replies

“And what do you plan on doing once you get there? Go through the gate?” Menthos asks

“No, I will shut it down.” Xanthos answers

The party readies for the grueling hike into the southern Majestics, due to the snow Xanthos felt it would take just as long for him to dig a new tunnel big enough for Doopa and Eeyore’s tiger to crawl through than in would be for them to just walk there themselves. 

It takes the party two days to reach the valley, they spy the sickening glow hours before they actually reach the valley though and it helps keep them on track. Every so often Xanthos would ask Eeyore if he saw any tracks that might be from frost giants or small goblinoids and every time Eeyore would reply with a “no”.

Even with Xanthos’ extra protections against the cold, the proximity of the ice gate still sent chills through the magic and threatened to grip their souls. Xanthos approached the pale blue gate first and peered around its two-dimensional edges.

“Haimish please come up here and cast _detect magic _ on this to see what we’re dealing with.” Xanthos implored

“Why him? I can do it without thinking.” Menthos answered

“I don’t trust you.” Xanthos replied

Haimish finished the words and concentrated on the gate, as he did so, the magic of the spell seemed to coalesce around his finger tips and then flake off like snow, falling in a freezing shower of magic at Haimish’s feet.

“Premature ensorcellation problem Haimish?” Menthos observed

Haimish just stared blankly in disbelief at the rainbow hued snow at his feet.

“Wait, this isn’t a two-way gate, it’s a one way gate, pouring the heart of the plane of ice out into this valley.” Xanthos determined

“Wow, that’s some impressive magics.” Eeyore stated

“Where’d Hledra go then?” Haimish asked

The party lets the question linger as Eeyore and Doopa advance to check out the gate for them selves. As they approach Xanthos and Haimish notice an aura around their bodies that tapers behind them like a comet tail, rainbow hued snow precipitates from this tail and falls upon the white snow below them.

“Wait! Your energy protection is being frozen away, get back from the gate lest it falters and you freeze permanently.” Xanthos instructs

The party halts their progress and begin to retreat, Haimish finds moving difficult almost as if he’s been frozen to the very spot he stood. Looking down he finds dark blue ice encrusted forearms reaching out of the snow beneath him and holding his legs in place.

“Ahh, I’m under attack!” Haimish shouts, his voice however carries only a few feet before the sound is frozen in midair and comes crashes down upon the hard snow.

Haimish squirms to get away from the arms and as he twists his body, he loses his balance and falls into the two feet of snow beneath him. Doopa catches the movement out of the corner of his eye and moves towards the fallen bard to help him. Two arms reach up through the snow and grasp Doopa’s ankles, the ogre forces his feet through the holds and his great strength is able to separate the hands from their forearm owners. 

Haimish tries to drag himself away from the grasping hands, only to find he’s aiding the upbringing of the arm’s owner as a dark blue corpse rises from the snow beneath him. It’s hands clench the bard’s knees tightly as it slowly pulls Haimish towards it’s former hiding place. Ice cold fingers instantly cause frostbite around Haimish’s knees, the corpse’s mouth is twisted in a mockery of horror and pain it’s shattered mind knowing only that it must extinguish all warmth. It’s black soulless eyes belie cold determination and a malevolence that only the most depraved can even hint at. 

Haimish kicks at the corpse’s face as it draws him closer, small bits of ice fleck off at the impact site, Haimish notes it’s face is a solid as iron and the only damage done was to the ligaments in Haimish’s knee. Xanthos leaps upon the undead creature as a polar bear and rips the thing’s head off, black slush oozes from it’s neck as the grip around Haimish’s legs finally abates. Doopa tosses the de-handed corpse he fished from the snow beneath him and tosses it into the air, using his massive club he then bats the undead monster into the gate. The body slows down as it reaches the gate and the creature ceases moving altogether just prior to colliding with the gate. Millions of frozen pieces of zombie are scattered across the valley as the undead abomination is neutralized. 

Dozens of small ice clouds emerge from Doopa’s mouth as the barbarian’s shouts of victory are frozen and crash to the ground. The party races back to Menthos’ position where they can finally communicate.

“Well, I think we can finally lay to rest any question on who the smartest person here is.” Menthos states

“What were those things?” Haimish inquires

“The welcoming committee, this was meant as a threat. We’re getting the attention of whomever left this gate here.” Xanthos answers

“The way the gate freezes anything close to it, there would be no need for the zombies to be there except as a maid service or for an overkill of protection.” Eeyore states

“We’re annoying someone.” Xanthos says almost tauntingly, “I’m coming for you orc, prepare your pyre! I will know no mercy!” Xanthos shouts at the gate.


----------



## Jon Potter

I smell Frostburn all over this scene. Am I right? And were there rules for words freezing and wards dispelling in there or are those your own bits of genius. I love the visual, regardless.

good stuff!


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> I smell Frostburn all over this scene. Am I right? And were there rules for words freezing and wards dispelling in there or are those your own bits of genius. I love the visual, regardless.
> 
> good stuff!





Frost & Fur actually.

And the freezing spells and words idea came from 2e Planescape regarding the Plane of Ice and how it would freeze thoughts (as well as anything else) so this battle was about as close as they could get to being in the plane and not get instantly frozen.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Frost & Fur actually.




Ah! Haven't looked at that one, but I've read lots of good things about it, this included. 



> And the freezing spells and words idea came from 2e Planescape regarding the Plane of Ice and how it would freeze thoughts (as well as anything else) so this battle was about as close as they could get to being in the plane and not get instantly frozen.




I should have recognized the influence of older editions in that scene! 3.X is a huge step forward in mechanics, but it lost a lot of the wonky flavor that used to frequently crop up in 1e and 2e. IMO, of course.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Hints and allegations*

The party returned to Kindoras Keep mostly despondent over the gate’s interactions with their protections and how to combat them. Xanthos however used the event to fuel his resolve to solve the riddle of the gate. No sooner had the party arrived back at the keep, that Xanthos took his leave and headed north to Catalan to discuss the gate with the druids there.

Menthos looked around the compound for Gorn but did not immediately spy him. He decided to head off to bed for a bit of a rest and would look for the captain after napping. Haimish found a group of workers taking a break from their repair duties and elected to entertain them for awhile, whilst Eeyore and Doopa helped boil snow into water for storage during the fast approaching early winter.

Menthos headed down the hallway towards his room and spotted a pyromancer loitering outside his door.

“You. You have a lot of explaining to do!” The pyromancer spoke as he pointed an index finger at Menthos 

Menthos ignored the man’s words and walked up into the path of the man’s jabbing finger, causing the pyromancer to jam it into Menthos’ leather jerkin. “Physical provocation will get you a discount disembowelment and a free disease.”

“You’re the one who walked into my hand.” The pyromancer answered

“Semantics. Your soul is forfeit, just in time too as I need an ice cube for my tea.” Menthos replies

“If it’s a duel you’re looking for, I am sure you will find me more than capable of cremating your remains beyond recovery.” The pyromancer challenges

“Really? If you’re so mighty why the hell is it so cold outside? Shouldn’t you, with all your power, be able to at least start a bonfire?” Menthos retorts, the pyromancer is caught off guard with no defense for the teifling’s words and is only able to stand in place mouth agape taking the warlock’s abuse, “Why don’t you go back to playing with your tinder twigs and flint and leave the balls of fire and shafts of scorchingness to the professionals?” Menthos finishes

The pyromancer walks off defeated with a bleeding ego. Menthos all fired up now from this encounter, changes his mind about a nap and spins around to head back to Aleena’s quarters. 

“Oh you’re back, did Timbre find you?” Aleena asks as Menthos enters her room

“Who?” Menthos answers

“Timbre, one of the pyromancers. Apparently someone showed up and the front gate about two hours ago waving the distress sign. Timbre saw it and rushed to let the man enter only to be rebuffed by Gorn who told Timbre that only you were to clear strangers and he needed to wait until you returned. He was pacing outside your room for the last hour waiting for you to get back.” Aleena explains

“No, he has not given me the message, and in fact if this is going to be typical of his follow-through then I suggest you light a fire under his ass and get him with the program here.” Menthos demands

“Ooh, I like it when you get demanding. You have to be somewhere important? Maybe you can stay for awhile and tell me about your trip?” Aleena asks, while rising and undoing a lace on her bodice.

“I got to go see Gorn, I’ll be back to fill you in later. You stay here and steam over that for a little bit and get hot about it.” Menthos suggests to Aleena’s glee.

Menthos heads back out to the keep’s gate where an impatient Gorn taps his foot on the hard ground as he watches the teifling approach. 

“Where ya been? I aint got all day ta track ya down ‘bout guests. I ain’t yer butler.” Gorn protests

“Thanks shorty, here’s a tip.” Menthos answers while tossing a copper piece at the Captain of the Guard and opening the gatehouse.

“Hey! I donna take bribes.” Gorn throws the copper piece back at Menthos, “an ya need to get yer firecrackers new attitudes ‘fore I hafta do it meself.” Gorn states

“No bribes huh? Here, I got another tip for you.” Menthos replies by flipping his middle finger up at the Gorn, then slipping inside the gatehouse as the captain’s fist ricochets off the door as it closes. Menthos then locks the door from the inside, much to the chagrin to a fuming door pounding Gorn.

“Are you in distress?” Menthos asks the huddled figure

A hooded head rises up from slouched shoulders and catches a bit of the afternoon sun through a window. The man’s face looks wind burned and scarred beyond excessive, a knotty finger emerges from within the man’s robes and points an accusing finger at Menthos.

“Are you the homeowner I seek?” the man voice croaks

“Yes, have you the package?” Menthos asks

The man produces a small cloth bag tied with bright red twine, and a smaller cloth wrapped package. He hands the wrapped package over to Menthos first; the warlock confirms his suspicions that this package contains the fire opals. The man hands the bag over next. Menthos opens it to find a black void; he looks back at the messenger with a quizzical expression.

“For Thruvimhurax the Cunning.” The man answers

“Yes, now who is that exactly?” Menthos asks and looks back towards the messenger only to find an empty set of robes covering a pile of ashes. Sighing heavily, Menthos tucks the bag and opals into his clothes and unlocks the gatehouse door.

Gorn bursts in, axe drawn and eyes wild.

“Oy, wat happen’d?” Gorn ask of the messenger while keeping his axe trained on the teifling.

“He pissed me off.” Menthos said and walked into Gorn’s axe, Gorn gave ground and dropped the weapon in fearful awe of the warlock.

Once Menthos had gone beyond close earshot, Gorn turned to his lieutenants and announced, “I wanna guard post’d on ‘im at all times, or it’ll be yer jobs”

Xanthos arrives in Catalan discretely and proceeds to the town’s druidic leaders; he demands an audience and waits outside the dinning hall for his opportunity. After three minutes, Xanthos determined it was taking too long and he burst into the hall, causing wooden spoons to fall out of hands and startled gasps to ripple across the table.

“What is the meaning of this?” someone demands

“There is a gate pouring the elemental plane of ice into our world, not a half day’s travel to the east as the eagle flies.” Xanthos states

“Yes, we are aware of its presence. That’s still no excuse for rudeness.” A druid reprimands 

“It needs to be shut down; it is the cause of the early winter. It is not natural.” Xanthos replies

“How do you know it is the cause of an early winter this year? Could it not just be making it colder and actually have nothing to do with the earlier onset of winter this year?” a druid asks

“Better yet why would you want to staunch the flow of a primal element into our world? Shouldn’t you be out there protecting its site from interlopers?” Another druid speaks up.

“Why is this even up for debate? This gate is not naturally occurring, it freezes all spells and words in its vicinity.” Xanthos responds

“Well, then how do you propose we close the gate? If our spells don’t work and we can’t talk, what do you think would work? A giant cork?” A druid replies, amid nods and voices of agreement with this druid’s question

“You do not believe in restoring nature’s balance? Your only wish is to be left alone? Happily I report to you that the gate shall grant your request when it turns this world into a snowball for the plane of ice to play with. What nature will you be protecting then?” Xanthos scathes the druids

“My good servant, we are not yet decided upon the true purpose behind the gate, nor how it came to be. Without this knowledge we cannot rule out for certain that this is not the path Rontra wished for us.” A druid replies

“Fine, I will return with this proof, but not before I show Rontra your level of complacency in your faith.” Xanthos warns

The shifter left the druids of Catalan and flew over the ice gate valley again, again noting the peaceful tranquility of the ice-covered valley below. Xanthos then sped off to buzz Hledra, even before he had reached the city; Xanthos again perceived no smoke trails from fires within Hledra’s boundaries. Xanthos flew circles around the tower hoping to get a shot taken at him. 

Instead Xanthos found nothing, anger welled up in the shifter, “How dare they leave me to die, and then fail to remain for my revenge. I will find you wherever you’ve gone. I will be the shadow behind your back, the whisper on the wind. This is your cue to start running!” Xanthos shouts.


----------



## pogre

Excellent!


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*The Dragon Font*

Xanthos returns to Kindoras with fire in his eyes, he explains the apparently empty state that Hledra finds itself in currently.

“Time to loot!” Menthos shouts

“This is most perplexing, why abandon their whole city? There was no sign of struggle, no sign of destruction?” Eeyore inquires

“None, the only thing emptier is my vengeance.” Xanthos answers

“I think you have issues, too much hate will lead you down a dark path that only ends with your death.” Haimish offers

“That may be true; however our side gets the girls.” Menthos explains

“I am not interested in procreation; I want to feel the beating heart of that orc leader fade away in my hands as I squeeze the blood from it. I want to digest its foul nature and grow a field in its waste.” Xanthos relates

“Yep, definitely anger issues.” Haimish states

“You should be interested in procreation, helps motivate me. Hell, the only reason I’m here for this meeting was that I was told Xanthos found something interesting at Hledra and I thought you had brought back some elven slave girls.” Menthos replies

“I find differentiating between your ego and your libido to be a trying endeavor.” Eeyore offers

“Too bad for you, I have a built in moral compass and it’s never pointed me in the wrong direction. Well, there was that one time in Carnage and a female bugbear, but it was only one time and I was so drunk that I don’t even count it.” Menthos relates

“Little man is sick.” Doopa says to Menthos

“Enough of this I return to Hledra this afternoon. Travel with me if you wish, but I shall not return without locating the orc who stole my heart.” Xanthos demands

“Aw, shucks Xanthos. I didn’t know that orc meant that much to you, see that’s why I don’t do love; gets too messy and then feelings get hurt and eventually you hate each other like you do now. Hey Haimish, write me up a good gnomish pity song about this I need something to sing to myself when a cold shower isn’t available.” Menthos answers

“How about I just give you the many songs I written about you?” Haimish says with a smirk

“No thanks, I know I’m great and just knowing you wrote ballads about me brings me such joy that I feel, nay I know that I will be unable to ever properly repay you for that.” Menthos answers, laying the sarcasm on thick. 

“Why are you even here?” Haimish asks

“Because I’m good at killing and you’re not.” Menthos answers immediately 

Haimish was going to respond but thought it best not to go down that road, playing with a psychopath’s mind offers no reward, especially when the big ogre with the tree trunk club was nodding in agreement to the warlock’s statement.

The troupe headed out right after breakfast, burrowed horses led them to Hledra by the next morning. The little snow that had fallen over the night had changed the complexion of the goblin city from an oppressive dark nature to a cold frosted but still intimidating nature. The snow blended the city’s hard lines into the white background of the mountains behind it giving the city a less stark ambience. 

Xanthos wasted no time in running up to the front door of the central tower, the rest of the group held back expecting the elf to get riddled with arrows and daggers; however Xanthos made it to the door with no effort and no ambush. He was soon joined by the rest of the group each one less tentative in line than the next one. Eeyore brought up the rear and felt no need to watch his back.

Once at the door, Xanthos grabbed the brass rings and planned to pull the door open, however they both fell outward and crashed around the party. 

“These doors had been ripped off their hinges and then someone replaced them by stacking them back onto the door frame.” Xanthos states

“What do you see inside?” Haimish inquires

“I see time as a lattice of infinite possibilities each flowing and melding into each other until there is only one clear undefined path of inestimable options.” Xanthos answers

“Quick, cast _tongues_.” Menthos says, elbowing Haimish

“Oh, and there’s giant tracks in the snow inside.” Xanthos finishes

“At least we have evidence of recent visitors.” Eeyore stated

The party entered the ground level of the tower, the human eyes adjusting to the dim light within. Several burn marks scared the walls like graffiti, giving the impression that something wide and on fire pushed its way down the hallway. Xanthos and Eeyore took lead, helping each other keep the giant tracks in sight and looking out for the general well-being of the party.

After meandering through several looted rooms and damaged hallways, Xanthos and Eeyore track a set of giant prints to a destroyed iron gate probably located opposite the entryway. A dead frost giant lay sprawled before the gate on the other side from the party. Xanthos turned the giant over to discover the cause of death, and finds the giant’s face and chest blistered so badly that the mere act of turning the body causes several to burst and a thick icy liquid escapes from each burst blister.

“Nasty magic, the orc must be nearby!” Xanthos exclaims as he walks passed the giant and onto a staircase leading to a natural cavern below the tower.

A soft blue light from the back of the cavern begins to grow as Xanthos descends the carved steps. Once at the base of the stairs, Xanthos peers over a field of gold and treasure the likes of which he has never seen nor heard described. The blue light flickers off the polished golden objects and many gems that litter the cavern floor. Looking out into the middle of the golden ocean, Xanthos sees a huge ribcage of some beast, its ribs turned up to appear as a skeletal Venus Fly-Trap. Inside the ribcage a blue light grows in both intensity and size.

“Holy Kador!” Menthos shouts as his knees give out in a near fainting response to the overwhelming smell of gold.

Haimish can only blabber as his appraise skill goes comatose and Oratory ability checks into a rehabilitation facility.

“This very bad place.” Doopa says his more savage nature taking the lead over greed.

“Obviously, we’re in the bowels of an orc city run by goblins. I think the chances of this being a gregarious philanthropist are highly unlikely.” Eeyore replies

“He’s hiding somewhere in here. Warlock, scan the area for magic, the greatest concentration is my destination.” Xanthos commands

Menthos however was way ahead of the shifter, already mapping out a detailed report of location and strength of each magical aura. Xanthos rips the map from the tiefling’s hands.

“I’m not here to finance your paternity suits.” Xanthos spits, looking over the map. Spying a concentration of magic below the blue glowing orb, Xanthos strides across the field of gold towards the center of the ribcage. 

Once within a hundred feet from the ribcage, the blue orb pulses quickly and then bursts forth in a shower of sparks that ricochet off the ceiling and walls of the entire cavern, splashing the party in residual electrical energy. A brilliant bluish light fills the cavern and then fades to reveal a vaguely draconic shape easily a hundred feet long. 

The dragon’s head is always present as is its spine however its limbs seem to move in and out of the prime plane. The entire creature is built upon a roiling blue energy that constantly creates a lightening show within the dragon’s “body”. 

“Great one, I seek an orcish warlord, perhaps his cowardly self hides amongst your vast field of wealth?” Xanthos says approaching the dragon.

The energy makes no sound, however it’s “eyes” have lowered to watch the progress of the shifter across the sea of gold. With no fear Xanthos enters the skeletal ribcage area and proceeds to the spot on Menthos’ map where the magic was most concentrated, directly below the energy dragon. Sifting through the gold beneath the dragon, Xanthos locates a secret door in the floor of the cavern. Excitement swells through his body as he grips the door and tears it off the floor of the cavern. Xanthos spots a body lying below in a short shaft, transforming into a thoqqua the shifter dives in and slams his searing body into the figure below. 

Clothing catches fire and desiccated skin flakes off in embers as Xanthos rips apart the dead goblin. Once his anger has subsided, he realizes this was not an orc at all. Spying the four rings lying on the ground where he destroyed the body and surmising that those were the objects Menthos had detected earlier, Xanthos bends down and picks them up and inspects them closely.

The rest of the party only saw the flash of blue light, as the claw moved at nearly the speed of light and shredded Xanthos’ very soul. Xanthos dropped to the ground instantly as energy claws tore their way down his body, leaving a blistering trail and an inner pain that was far more intense than watching his own heart ripped from his chest and crushed before him. No sound escaped his lips, the paralyzing ache wouldn’t allow anything to move and for the next few minutes he could only hear and see nothingness. 

The dragon then reached down and plucked Xanthos from the shaft’s floor and flung him into the far wall above the party. The shifter’s body slammed into the wall with a wet slap and fell to the ground next to the party. Haimish and Eeyore rushed to Xanthos side as Menthos and Doopa both gave admiring whistles to the energy dragon.

“The orc is not in this room.” A weak Xanthos states

Healing was applied to the shifter and he was soon able to stand almost pain free.

“Maybe you should take a few coins with you as a memento Menthos?” Xanthos offered

“What do you think I am, stupid? You kill it first and then we can race to see who loots better.” Menthos answers

The party leaves the dragon enigma behind as they head back into the ground level of the tower.

“Well there are a few tracks that go this way.” Eeyore points out.

“That way it is then.” Xanthos states, his body and soul shaken, his resolve however steeled more than ever.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Menthos the great!*

The party follows a set of giant tracks as they round a corner, peeking around the corner Xanthos finds a short hallways ending in ice covered steps descending into the earth. 

“Looks like we found the way down.” Xanthos alerts the group

“Be less specific.” Menthos responds

Xanthos grabs the warlock’s shoulders and shove him into the hallway, Menthos slides to a stop near the top of the stairs.

“See any giants?” Xanthos inquires

“Just Doopa.” Menthos answers

The party carefully treks down the slippery stairs and into a hallway below, Xanthos and Eeyore both confirm the giant tracks go in both directions, left and right. Choosing right, the party traipses down to a corner to the left. Peering around this corner, Xanthos finds a hallway with four doors and another corner to the right at the end of the hallway about eighty feet down the hall.

“First door on the right?” Xanthos asks to confirm his decision with the party, agreeing, the party moves to that door.

Xanthos listens intently for sounds coming from within, however he detects nothing. Looking back at the group, Xanthos motions for them to get ready and be prepared to strike at anything that comes charging out the door. Xanthos shoves the door open and finds a desecrated temple. An unnatural red glow emanates from a small closet to the left of the altar, dead orcs litter the floor and blood is spilled everywhere as if their bodies just exploded. Xanthos spotted that the blood hadn’t frozen yet and therefore these deaths were recent. Filled with excitement, he entered the room to get a better look.

He found the room resisting his entrance, as if a magical force was trying to prevent him from gaining access. Xanthos pushed ahead anyway and felt his brain wracked with pain as meta-physical spike was shoved through his skull. Staggering back, Xanthos fell into Haimish’s arms.

“What is it?” Haimish asked

“Don’t know, it lifted as soon as I fell outside the room.” Xanthos answered

“Ghost?” Haimish offered

“Spell?” Eeyore offered

“Magic?” Doopa offered

“Hormones?” Menthos offered

“Magic likely.” Xanthos replied while scowling at Menthos

“Yay! Doopa win again!” The ogre shouted and danced 

“Let’s move on then.” Eeyore commented

“No, I want to learn what happened in this room, what killed these orcs and if it still lingers in this area.” Xanthos stated, regaining his feet and inspecting the door frame.

“Find anything?” Haimish asks

“I’m fairly certain that I was not attacked, I’m more convinced it is some kind of divine energy at work here, most probably a _forbiddance_ spell. We’ll need someone of the orcs beliefs to enter the room without getting feedback.” Xanthos reports

“Why can’t you go? You can turn into an orc, close enough right?” Menthos suggests

“The change is cosmetic, not spiritual. We’ll need someone rotten to the core, black-hearted, and seething with immoral pustules, someone who’s very existence it is to keep wounds from closing, to propagate festering within that wound and spread its disease over all that is natural.” Xanthos replied

“Sounds like Haimish is your man to me.” Menthos answered

“I beg your pardon.” Haimish retorts

“Fine, you are free to go, your debt to society has been paid.” Menthos responded

While Menthos and Haimish argued behind him, Xanthos sent a _mage hand _ with a small mirror around the room to investigate the bodies from afar. He eventually reached into the small closet and located a set of bloodstained daggers rested in an open vellum lined chest. Casting another _mage hand_, Xanthos positioned the mirror to watch the daggers while he directed the new _mage hand _ to pick up each one and lay them on the floor about five feet into the room.

“Why not bring them out into the hallway?” Eeyore asks

“They appear to be the murder weapons of choice, likely important sacrificially, nonetheless I want to see them up close without angering some debased deity.” Xanthos answers

“How you kill with shiny needle?” Doopa asked, to him the daggers were more like fingernail clearers than a useful weapon.

“Do not underestimate the power of bleeding out, one nick to an artery and even you would be useless except to the fungus.” Xanthos answered, “You, demonic half-breed, what do you make of these?” Xanthos asks Menthos

“What? You already looted? Sacrilegious.” Menthos answers

The warlock walks into the room, forgetting the adverse reaction Xanthos had moments ago, and kneels over the dagger to the far right. Many thoughts pass through the heads of the party, some wondering if Xanthos had faked the pain, others wondering if Menthos was superhuman, and Xanthos finally confirming what he suspected all along.

Menthos grabbed the hilt of the small pointed dagger and admired its delicate beauty.

“Well? We’re waiting demon, what say you?” Xanthos demands

“I say I know the time of your death, the hour strikes very near for one of the sun. Surely you of all people can appreciate the delicate nature of what must be done for chrysalis to be shattered.” Menthos answers

“That was poetic, Strom? Or Gunornt?” Haimish asks

“Your epitaph will speak of deeds undone and cowardice unsheltered.” Menthos replies

“Hardly.” Haimish scoffs

“Your lips will move to the machinations of the lich lord as one of his many prophets.” Menthos answers

“Okay, now you’re just being creepy. Come out of there before your brain rots any further.” Haimish states

“You should not enter, your blood is not pure enough to receive my blessing. Send in the bug, he shall make a fine trophy.” Menthos asks

“Leave him, he is no longer an asset.” Xanthos says turning his back on the warlock and moving to the rear of the group gawking at the doorway

“Doopa get.” The ogre waded into the room and bent down to heft Menthos off the floor, only to have the teifling blink to the left. Unbalanced Doopa tried to correct his maneuver, only to have Menthos shove a foot into the ogre’s left knee and the barbarian slipped face first into the blood soaked floor. 

This caught Xanthos’ attention as he turned back to see Eeyore enter the room behind Doopa.

“He’s stuck to the blood on the floor, he can’t breathe a little help here Menthos, and your dirty trick is going to get someone killed.” Eeyore pleads

Menthos smirked and walked up alongside Eeyore and reached his hand forward to grab Doopa’s kicking left leg. Instead the warlock shifted the dagger in his other hand and jabbed it point first into the throat of Eeyore. The ranger’s eyes when wide with shock as the pain of the attack was quickly fading as Eeyore’s blood sprayed forth from a wound that continued to widen across the ranger’s neck.

Haimish shrieked as Xanthos leapt into action, transforming into a bi-pedal bear. The massive half-ursine engulfed the warlock in its massive paws and tried to squeeze the teifling into submission, “Help Eeyore!” Xanthos growled

Menthos was having none of that, shoving his right elbow under Xanthos’ ribs and then with an incredible feat of strength, the warlock shoved the half-ton bear back onto his haunches. Haimish pulled up short of the dying Eeyore, not wanting to get stabbed in the throat as well. Xanthos regained his feet and eyed down the warlock.

“Impossible! You are weak!” Xanthos roared as his charged the warlock again.

This time Menthos paid him no heed, even keeping his back to the charging bear, Xanthos reared up and Menthos kicked Xanthos in the crotch. The shifter doubled over and Menthos used the lower position of the bear’s jaw to grab its throat and toss it backwards into the hallway.

“Inconceivable!” Xanthos gaped in awe

Eeyore’s white tiger dives into the warlock and knocks Menthos prone. Haimish uses the opportunity to apply pressure to Eeyore’s neck while noticing that Doopa is kicking very lethargic now. 

The tiger grips Menthos around his head as the warlock twists his blade into the tiger’s gut, the animal retreats in pain and limps around trying to get the gushing fluid from leaving its body as well.

Enraged, Xanthos shifts into a otyugh and finally gets a grip on Menthos. The struggling warlock drops the dagger as the tiger bleeds out onto the floor dying next to his master. Xanthos dregs Menthos out into the hallway and shoves him up against the wall several times until the teifling goes unconscious. He then turns back into a bi-pedal bear and pulls Doopa free from the floor and begins to give him CPR in an attempt to get the ogre breathing again. Haimish manages to get Eeyore’s blood loss to cease as a figure darkens the room’s entryway.


----------



## Jon Potter

Wow!

I've been forced to cut back on my board time, but I finally managed to read your last two updates. Brutal. But in a good way.

What's the story with the "dragon enigma"? Pretty cool description at any rate.



> "We’ll need someone rotten to the core, black-hearted, and seething with immoral pustules, someone who’s very existence it is to keep wounds from closing, to propagate festering within that wound and spread its disease over all that is natural.”




Well I immediately thought of Menthos...

And ya gotta love Domination.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Wow!
> 
> I've been forced to cut back on my board time, but I finally managed to read your last two updates. Brutal. But in a good way.
> 
> What's the story with the "dragon enigma"? Pretty cool description at any rate.
> 
> 
> 
> Well I immediately thought of Menthos...
> 
> And ya gotta love Domination.




The Dragon enigma is a dragon font from the Races of the Dragon WOTC book. Why it was there was never explored by the party, they just left it alone and never went back. *In game, it protected an artifact a future enemy of the party's needed*

if you thought Menthos was evil then wait until he starts his recruitment drive....


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> if you thought Menthos was evil then wait until he starts his recruitment drive....




Oh dear... I can hardly wait...  :\


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*What was lost is regained, sort of.*

Eeyore tracks orc footsteps to a descending stone staircase, humid warm air rises from the bottom of the stairs, creating a drifting whisp-like fog at head level for most in the party. The cold air creates a thin layer of frost at the top of the stairs and along the walls just surrounding it. 

“Looks like they fled down, most of these steps were taken while they were running.” Eeyore comments

“As long as there is nowhere to run down there, a heightened hormone response tastes better than a sleeping one.” Xanthos responds

Nervous looks pass between Menthos and Haimish as Doopa nods in agreement.

The descent down the stairs ends at a heavy wooden door, pressing his ear to the wood, Xanthos can make out the sound of battle beyond the door. The shifter waves Doopa over excitedly, once up to the door, Xanthos shoves it open and gleefully announces, “All orcs shall perish before the might of the Xanthos the heartless!” 

His battle cry echoes through an empty hallway, to the party’s left the familiar sounds of flesh ripping and bones cracking twist their way around a corner to assail the party’s senses.

“Premature exultation happens to the best of them.” Menthos states

Xanthos sprints to the edge of the corner and peers around to watch four large hunched over black skinned creatures mauling a group of blue slaad. The black creatures had wicked serrated hooks for their right hands and large fiddler-like crab claws for their left hands. Their face was a mixture of horns and teeth, Xanthos could make out no visible eyes nor ears. 

The shifter watched the beasts dance their dance of death as one after another the blue slaad were eviscerated and left to rot upon the floor of the room. The rest of the party caught up to the shifter, just as the smell of chaotic death washed over their heads. Scents of roses and baked pie were intermixed with those of burnt dried feces and troll phlegm. 

“Nasty, I’m both hungry and nauseated at the same time. Ugh.” Haimish reeked

The four creatures turned to face the party, insect-like maws twitching in anticipation of soft flesh for a feast. 

“Greetings, I seek the orcs of this abode. Do you know their whereabouts?” Xanthos steps forward and asks

The four creatures rush the shifter who quickly changes to the form of a girralon, his four arms slamming against the first creature to close to him. Doopa howled and the chance to kill something and leapt impatiently into battle careening his huge cudgel off the backs of the creatures. Eeyore skidded across the room’s entrance to the opposite corner where a closed door was located; he then turned and braced his foot against the door. Haimish broke into song;

_We used to love
You used to care
Now it's hard to find
The feeling we shared
You found a way
To even the score
And we don't have mercy anymore_


“That doesn’t motivate me.” Menthos comments

Between Xanthos the girralon and Doopa’s mighty stick, the creatures are defeated with little blood loss from the party.

“Neither of these is natural, the orcs here are delving into things best left alone.” Xanthos comments

“You’re either awkwardly feminine or a paladin, there is no grey.” Menthos responds

“That makes no sense.” Haimish replies

“About as much as your ditty did.” Menthos answers

“We have no time to fight; I feel a wrinkle in this plane awaits us down here.” Eeyore states

“Okay, that made no sense.” Menthos comments

Xanthos and Doopa wander off past the door that led them to this battle and down the hallway where a huge ornate marble double door waits on the south wall. Their whistle of impressiveness beckons to the rest of the party and they soon join in the gawking over the door. 

“I wonder what’s inside.” Haimish ponders

“Only one way to find out.” Xanthos answers as he grasps the two knockers and pulls the doors open.

The chamber beyond contained a single block of obsidian laced with veins of a blood red mineral. The pillar-like block took up a third of the room and was positioned in the center of the chamber, three quarters of the way up the block a naked human male was chained spread eagle to the block and slowly dripped blood down the party facing side. The blood pooled around the base of the block and seemed to bubble or boil. 

Upon seeing the party enter, the man looks down at them and strained out a warning, “Run……they’re coming……..run”

“Orcs? Where are they?” Xanthos shouts

The block groans and a great ripping sound is heard through the chamber as a rainbow of slaad materialize out from the pillar, blue, red, and green upright frogs advance into the room. Then the pillar cracks and shatters as a doorway to their home void pushes it’s way into the room and a black scythe wielding slaad floats through into the room.

“Sorry to have disturbed you.” Xanthos states as he pushes the party through the double doors and into the hallway and casts _meld stone _ upon the door to meld them into one big piece of rock, “we should be safe, let’s see them get through that.”

“They don’t need to.” Menthos said

Xanthos turned to ask what the warlock meant when he saw the slaads walk through the stone walls surrounding the party as if it was air.

“Oh.” Xanthos replied

Transforming back into a girralon, Xanthos held off the slaads to the west while Doopa took up the defense on the east side. Eeyore crawled up the wall and worked his way behind the slaad line on Doopa’s side and began attacking them from the rear. Haimish assisted Xanthos and tried to keep the slaad from getting behind them and flanking them. Menthos looked for a way to get out of the hallway and back into the room where it must be safer considering all the slaad were now out in the hallway.

“Hey Xanthos, fix the doors so they work again!” Menthos shouted

“What? Why don’t you do something productive and help us kill these things before we’re overrun and die here in disgrace?” Xanthos shouted back

“I don’t go good with a slaad and I’m not getting impregnated ever, so I’m not really feeling your sense of urgency here.” Menthos responds

“Get over here and fight! I’m not going to fail to exact revenge on the stealers of my heart because of your lack of testosterone.” Xanthos shouts back

“The rainbow coalition frightens me, maybe you could back them up a little more and I can snipe them from afar?” Menthos requests

The sealed marble doors melt away as the death slaad ambles into the fray slices his scythe down at the oblivious tiefling. The immaterial blade scores deep into Menthos’ soul and then exits his body at the knees and cuts into the floor, rotting away the stone as if it were stale bread. 

Menthos doubles over screaming in agony as the death slaad takes aim on the hapless warlock for a killing blow. Xanthos grabs two green slaads and tosses them over his shoulder into the focused death slaad. A handful of _magic missiles _ pepper the back of the death slaad as the chained human spits out the vocal component of the spell through his bloodied mouth.

Doopa and Eeyore turn the tide on their side as Eeyore would dart in and bite the slaad, transforming his mouth long enough to deliver a venom laced spider bite and then back to an elf before Doopa caught a glimpse of the transformation. The weakened slaad were easy pickings for the enraged barbarian, as Doopa dispatched those on his side of the marble door.

The death slaad turns back to it’s captive and laughs hideously as it raises a finger towards the chained man, Doopa rears back and nails the outsider in the back of it’s head causing the slaad to point it’s finger at the suddenly not so healthy looking ogre. 

“Out of my way!” Xanthos yells as he kicks Menthos back into the room he was searching for a way into. Xanthos pummels the death slaad with his four fists as Haimish attempts to fight off a prism of tongues and claws his shield ripped off his arm and tossed aside as his weapon sways to and fro glistens in the flickering torch light in the hallway. 

Eeyore darts around Doopa to fit in-between the ogre and the shifter. The death slaad promptly kicks the ranger into the opposite wall across the hallway. Menthos claws his way up to his hands and knees to get a bearing on where he is he spots a sunken basin in both forward corners of the room, each one glinting with the promise of treasure. Menthos slinks off to the one on his left as the chained human captive sends another _magic missile _ volley into the death slaad.

Bleeding from reopened old wounds and finding it hard to avoid breathlessness, Doopa continues to clock the death slaad as if it was a dirty rug. Xanthos tries to grasp the death slaad’s scythe, only to find himself standing five feet tall as an  elf looking up and the large outsider and unable to change back into any meaningful form. 

“No!” Xanthos screams as he fruitlessly rails against the death slaad’s body with his elven hands. 

Haimish retreats back to stand alongside Xanthos as Doopa calls for Eeyore to get off his lazy butt and help him fight. Menthos rummages through a stack of potions lying in the sunken treasure pit and finding the one he needs uncorks it and downs the whole bottle. 

Slaad press against the west side of the hallway as Haimish shieldless and quickly tiring tries to keep Xanthos from falling under the outsider onslaught. Doopa’s labored breathing began to drown out the sound of his solid hits on the slaad as Eeyore shook the stars from his concussion and attempted to get back into combat. 

“Hey monkey hurlage!” Menthos called as his hasted body fired two eldritch blasts every few seconds into the death slaad 

The death slaad squealed in surprise and flew back through the open wound on the pillar of obsidian, Eeyore regained his feet and together with a quickened Menthos they dispatched the last remaining slaad in the hallway. 

“Huzzah! I kick ass!” Menthos shouts

The rest of the party limps back into the chamber, where Doopa and Xanthos collapse in a tired heap.

“Please, someone get me down.” The chained man cries

“You are in no position to bargain, I’ll cut you down after I’ve freed this room of it’s heavy treasure burden.” Menthos answers

“Menthos that man probably saved your life, the least you can do it get him down from up there.” Haimish admonishes

“Probably saved my life, not definitely, besides I’m not into the kinky stuff. If he likes stretched out over cold stone while slaads rip through the fabric of this plane, who am I to truly halt his pleasure boat?” Menthos responds

“My name is Adukol, I hail from Lenap. I will be so ever grateful if you could end my torment upon this prison.” The man speaks

“If slaads imprisoned him, he’s either too lawful or he’s a real sick in the head kind of guy.” Eeyore offers

“Well, I for one am willing to grant this man his freedom. No one should have to be subjected to this level of indecency.” Haimish relates

“Try mating with a lemure.” Menthos retorts

Haimish and Eeyore assault the pillar and climb up to the chained Adukol and begin to release him. Menthos decides to wander around to the other side of the pillar where he finds another man chained to the pillar; this one however has passed out from blood loss. Although he still retains a pulse, his pale complexion signals his death looms on the horizon. 

Xanthos and Doopa return to their feet and begin sifting through the two pits of treasure, looking for anything useful. Haimish and Eeyore help Adukol to the floor, as Xanthos offers the human a foul smelling jelly substance.

“What’s this for?” Adukol inquires

“I don’t want your stench fouling up my plans to find the orcs of Hledra, you smell like blood. If you’re going to follow us around you better get rid of that stink.” Xanthos said

“Um, thanks I guess.” Adukol accepts the gift

Doopa pulls up a small wooden box, and Xanthos’ ears perk up. A familiar *thump* *thump* sounds from within the small box, “Give me that!” Xanthos demands

The shifter retreats to the other side of the room as Eeyore comes over to help Doopa loot the treasure pits. The ogre picks up a small bag containing some things that sound like fake coins, the two look at each other and shrug, Doopa tosses Eeyore the bag and upon opening it, Eeyore finds it full of small black circular objects. 

Menthos rounds the pillar with another naked man and announces, “I found a cleric!” 

Xanthos opens the box and to his elation finds a beating heart within; reduced to tears Xanthos reaches into the box and holds the organ in his hands. Eeyore reaches into the bag and shuffles his hand through the contents to verify that the bag only contains the small black coins-like objects.

Xanthos releases a head shattering scream as the room turns to watch in horror as the heart in his hands paralyzes the shifter then grows two tendrils which latch onto the chest of Xanthos and cleave his chest upon. Separating skin, muscle and bone, the tendrils latch onto Xanthos’ current heart and yank the organ from it’s resting place. Xanthos’ old heart is discarded, sent sliding across the stone floor, the heart from the box then enters Xanthos chest cavity and makes itself at home, reattaching arteries and veins to itself and retracting the tendrils it grew as it zips up Xanthos’ chest and leaving no outwardly physical trace of the replacement. 

Eeyore was next to scream as his paralyzed body peels it’s flesh away from the underlying musculature starting on the fingertips and retreating down his body until his boots are forced off his feet as the skin rolls up and off his body completely, then the replacement takes over as the small black objects from the bag work to overlay themselves onto Eeyore’s exposed muscle and tissue. When it was complete the once fair looking high elf, had been transformed into a blacked scaled monstrosity unrecognizable in his new form.

“On second thought, I think a renegotiation of my rates is in order.” The cleric says


----------



## Jon Potter

You know what I've decided I like best about this story hour, HM? When I read a lot of other threads on this board, I can usually tell what's going on. I can recognize spell effects, monsters, templated critters, etc. But not with you! In just about every single post I have a moment of: WTF? This time I had two in rapid succesion.



			
				Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Xanthos releases a head shattering scream as the room turns to watch in horror as the heart in his hands paralyzes the shifter then grows two tendrils which latch onto the chest of Xanthos and cleave his chest upon. Separating skin, muscle and bone, the tendrils latch onto Xanthos’ current heart and yank the organ from it’s resting place. Xanthos’ old heart is discarded, sent sliding across the stone floor, the heart from the box then enters Xanthos chest cavity and makes itself at home, reattaching arteries and veins to itself and retracting the tendrils it grew as it zips up Xanthos’ chest and leaving no outwardly physical trace of the replacement.
> 
> Eeyore was next to scream as his paralyzed body peels it’s flesh away from the underlying musculature starting on the fingertips and retreating down his body until his boots are forced off his feet as the skin rolls up and off his body completely, then the replacement takes over as the small black objects from the bag work to overlay themselves onto Eeyore’s exposed muscle and tissue. When it was complete the once fair looking high elf, had been transformed into a blacked scaled monstrosity unrecognizable in his new form.




You must really keep your players on the edge of their seats wondering what's going to be next.

So now I gotta ask: what are we talking here? Symbiots? Grafts of some kind?


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> So now I gotta ask: what are we talking here? Symbiots? Grafts of some kind?




Grafts, specifically Slithilar grafts from _Lords of Madness_, only they don't quite work right as the party soon finds out.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> Grafts, specifically Slithilar grafts from _Lords of Madness_, only they don't quite work right as the party soon finds out.




So I guess I was able to _sort of_ guess after all.

I love the descriptions you gave for their attachment to the unwitting hosts. Absolutely, delightfully gruesome!


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Oggy Woggy want kissy kissy*

Xanthos’ bodily control returns to him in a jerk as the shifter falls to the floor and pounds away at the stones beneath him with his bare fists.

“No, they’ve taken my heart a second time.” Xanthos sobs

Eeyore tires out his new organ, it clicks as it moves sounding like hundreds of insects crawling over stone. Testing its hardness, Eeyore is impressed with the increased protection this new skin seems to promise him. 

“You people are either desperate or crazy to want a Slithilar implant, I think death by slaad would’ve been better they’re only crazy.” The human cleric Menthos located states

“So you know of such things? What else does this do?” Eeyore asks

“It took away your manhood and left you a eunuch.” Menthos observes

Eeyore tried to bend over to see but found the skin had locked in place, “mmph, elph eh kahnt moof.”

For several seconds the ranger was unable to move, even his lips refused to part and he was forced to muffle his replies through his closed mouth. Xanthos felt hot and cold at the same time as hormones shot through his bloodstream causing his to have blackout spells and fits of twitchiness. Transforming into a tiger, Xanthos found the going a little easier.

“What’s wrong with me?” Xanthos pleads to the cleric

“How should I know? I don’t make implants, you’ll have to find a Slithilar and talk to them.” The man replied

“Where can I find one?” Xanthos inquired

“Croy.” Adokul spoke up, “But you can only get there with a guide, and I don’t know any of sufficient power who are capable of this.”

“Well, first we have to get out of here.” Haimish states, “and what’s your name stranger?”

“Kourk, follower of Zenkeef the Mischief.” Comes the reply

“Doopa know of Zenkeef, many good parties had by her name.” The ogre comments

“Yes, it’s what kept me from instant death by the slaads; they loved my dancing so much they prolonged my life until you could rescue me.” Kourk replies

“Who said you were rescued?” Menthos interjects

A confused Kourk turns around, “I er, assumed that I ah.”

“Don’t you ever feel guilty playing with people’s emotions like that?” Haimish asks

“I only do to people who would do the same to me if they were any smarter.”  Menthos answers

“So you use arrogance to cancel guilt?” Haimish inquires

“It’s a good system.” Menthos responds

“Oh I see, I’m the butt of the joke. I need to score me some alcohol and goodberries, I’m too sober to understand your sarcasm.” Kourk states

Xanthos retrieves his former heart off the floor and returns to the party while wrapping it in cloth, “First we wipe out all the orcs in this hell and make sure their souls are tortured even in the afterlife.”

“You seem to have anger management issues, perhaps a roll in the hay with Zenkeef will lighten your troubled spirits?” Kourk offers

 “Back away preacher man, if you’re not coming with me then stay here and watch time dissolve into a wasted life.” Xanthos answers

“Touchy.” Kourk says

“It’s that time of the month.” Menthos answers

Xanthos walks out into the hallway and turns to the right heading away from the stairs leading up, the rest of the group soon acquiesces as one by one they join Xanthos making the next person’s decision that much easier. 

The party comes to a closed wooden door, not bothering to listen for sound from the other side, Xanthos kicks the door in to find a room with a thick layer of frost on every surface. A large stack of bodies occupies the right half of the room. Xanthos strides right in just ahead of the rest of the party, upon reaching the midway point, the pile of bodies shifts as a dozen zombies rise to battle the group.

Xanthos transforms into treant and clears a wide swath of undead from the party’s path. Doopa dives into combat swinging his club at anything that gets near him. Haimish breaks into song which brings Kourk into a dancing mood and he quickly begins dancing to the bard’s tune. Eeyore moves up to cover the rear flank of the group, he manages a swing on a zombie before his skin locks up again and he remains motionless for the zombies to pound away at. 

Menthos launches a salvo of eldritch blasts into the zombies around Eeyore, spellless and weaponless, Adokul could only cheer on the teifling. 

Xanthos and Doopa however are able to finish off the zombies without any further assistance and the party moves on to the next door for Xanthos to kick in. This room however is devoid of anything but frost.

“Why is it so cold down here?” Adokul observes

“Something opened a gate to the elemental plane of ice, we’ve been hunting down that mystery but the peevish one keeps getting distracted by orcs, lucky it now appears the two are related since no one would intentionally create an orccicle that would taste like excrement.” Menthos relates

“I don’t think it would be so bad if I was wearing something befitting a man of my stature.” Adokul states

“Are you a king?” Haimish asks

“No, I’m a student of the Mystic Arts.” The wizard answers

Menthos eldritch blasts the pile of dead bodies, “can you do that?”

Adokul shakes his head, Menthos fires a dozen more blasts into the pile of dead bodies in the room behind them, “how about that?” 

Again Adokul shakes his head. “Then shut up.” Menthos demands

Xanthos breaks down the next door and the party can here a great din coming down the hallway beyond the room.

“At last! I have found the cowardly little bugs.” Xanthos squeals and rushes down the hallway followed by Eeyore and Doopa.

All three skid to a stop as the hallway turns and enters a huge amphitheater where dozens of undead mill about watching a lone figure work over a stone circle mounted on the wall on the theater’s stage.

A disappointing breath escapes the shifter as he realizes there are no orcs in this room. Doopa however is more than thrilled to knock prone permanently a few undead, he steps into the room along with Eeyore. From across the room another entrance lurks this one populated with demons, as Doopa swings his tree through the bodies of nearby undead the rest of the room is alerted to their presence. 

A _blade barrier _ goes up in-between Xanthos and Eeyore and then a telekinetic shove is used against both Eeyore and Doopa and they are flung back through the _blade barrier_. The wet slick sound of ripping flesh echoes back up the hallway as the two bodies flop to the ground next to Xanthos. 

“Argh! Why can’t I find any orcs?” Xanthos shouts and transforms into a will-o-wisp and moves through the _blade barrier _ and into the room 

At this intrusion, three invisible stalkers are called forth to deal with the incorporeal Xanthos. The rest of the party skids to a stop before the _blade barrier_. Eeyore and Doopa moan their way to a sitting position.

“Can you help them?” Haimish asks Kourk

Kourk walks over to Doopa and spying a still bleeding wound, applies pressure to it and give it a kiss.

“There, does the big oggy woggy fell better wetter after the kissy kissy?” Kourk asks

“I believe Haimish said help them, not nauseate them.” Menthos remarks

“When did I get the chance to pray for spells? What would you have me do?” Kourk asks

“Pray Doopa didn’t here you talk baby to him.” Haimish says

The three invisible stalkers push Xanthos back towards the blade barrier where the lone figure on the theater stage begins laying _walls of force _ around Xanthos blocking him in.

“Uh oh, Xanthos is trapped.” Adokul mentions

“Here help me drag Eeyore and Doopa back up to the empty room.” Menthos directs Kourk

“Shouldn’t we help Xanthos?” Haimish asks

“I can’t put him out of his misery through a _wall of force_, I’m sure he’ll figure something out.” Menthos states

The lone figure motions across the circular stone and in its place a corridor of darkness grows, devouring all matter in its wake until the gate is stabilized. The figure motions for the zombies to march into the gate as the demons quickly cross the amphitheater to deal with the interlopers.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Tithe*

Xanthos transforms into a thoqqua and burrows under the cage of force, appearing on the other side of the blade barrier. Two vrocks and a marilith rip the force walls to shreds as they advance on the party. Xanthos transforms again into a girallon and scoops up Doopa, Eeyore and cork. Adukol, Menthos and Haimish quickly follow the retreating Xanthos back to the frozen room.

“We’re horribly out numbered and out powered, a frontal assault would not allow for any of you to survive.” Xanthos states

“In that case I thank you for your concern, why stop here then? Why not simply continue until daylight is reached again, or has the sun failed on this world for I’ve noticed it is very cold in here.” Kourk states

“I am going back in; they shall not escape my wrath!” Xanthos announces

“I didn’t see any orcs in there Xanthos; I think it’s safe to assume they’re all dead.” Haimish answers

“Nonsense! They yet live and they will taste the level of degradation I’ve felt for the past weeks a hundred fold, I will rain down a shower of vengeance the likes of which Maal has never seen!” Xanthos thunders away

“More like you’ll die whimpering cowering in a ball under a table as the marilith licks your freshly plucked limbs free of flesh.” Adukol responds

“You know noting of what you speak, I have spent hours searching for vengeance and I shall not be denied by one who wasn’t smart enough to out think a slaad.” Xanthos answers

“Hey as long as you’re marching off to your death, could you at least take care of the ogre so he can protect the rest of us from that chip on your shoulder?” Menthos chimes in

Xanthos clenches his fists and raises them above the warlock’s head and takes a deep breath in.

*yawn* “Look, if you’re going to use hate to drive your personal engine of destruction, the least you could do is switch to food that is actually cooked and not fresh roots and twigs. You smell like fromunda cheese wrapped in burnt bacon.” Menthos states

Xanthos calms down a little and grab the head of Doopa and sends a healing wave into the ogre’s body. Doopa’s eyes flash open as his consciousness returns. Xanthos turns and leaves the party where they lie and heads back to the gate room. 

“He’s going to die down there.” Kourk says

“We all die; at least he’ll be dying doing something he wants to do.” Haimish states

“Maybe. I want a foursome with a female elf, teifling, and gnome but I don’t want to have to die to get it. In that case I’ll just settle for a threesome plus a nightcap.” Menthos answers

Doopa hefts Eeyore up and they begin the trek back to the surface when Xanthos returns.

“The enemy has slapped their arrogance in my face once again! I return to accept my fate and they’ve left me with nothing to fight, not even a gate to track them through! They think me unworthy of killing!” Xanthos seethes with rage and pounds his fists against the frozen walls of the room. 

“So you’re saying they just left?” Adukol questions 

“Yes!” Xanthos bellows

“That makes no sense, demons wouldn’t do that and they certainly aren’t afraid of you.” Adukol answers

“You intimate me a liar?” Xanthos foams

“No, I think he’s calling you subverted.” Menthos responds

“You! I have no problem ripping your head off your body, dragging your skull to the gate room and letting the rest of them remote view the room through your twisted eye sockets.” Xanthos screeches 

“Hmm, I see. Well lead on then.” Menthos answers, following the shifter back down the hallway.

“Aren’t you wary of falling into a trap?” Haimish says

“No, because we’ve already been down this hallway twice and not fallen into any pits.” Menthos answers

The rest of the party follows the two men out of morbid curiosity and once they reach the gate room, Xanthos is vindicated as it is indeed empty. Adukol and Kourk move up to examine the spot where the gate had formed earlier, while Xanthos transforms into a viper and slithers around the room tasting the air. 

After an hour of prodding they determine everyone left through the gate including the demons, although the sorcerer has no idea how the gate was formed. Kourk and Doopa move ahead to scout out the opposite corridor from the entrance to the room and they soon discover a door that appears to be barred form the inside. Calling back for assistance, the rest of the party meets them at the door. Xanthos transforms into a thoqqua again and melts the stone and metal off the door, revealing a large treasure room.

“Jackpot!” Haimish shouts

Menthos, Haimish and Xanthos all cast _detect magic _ to reveal the locations of magic items in the room as Kourk pushes his way in to find something he can use for armor other than the wipe rag Xanthos gave him. Menthos ends his detection after getting the number and location of each item, Haimish and Xanthos continue to study to find the item with the highest concentration of magic. 

Instantly a ring and a small black rock outshine all others in the detection. Haimish reaches for the rock but Xanthos shoves him aside.

“My Heart?” Xanthos cries out as he picks up the cold rock, which upon further handling appears to instead be some kind of ice as the warmth of Xanthos’ hand causes the rock to get slick. Xanthos sets the rock back down and observes his hands covered in blood.

Haimish regroups and procures the ring safely into his hands, turning the ring over he finds ancient dwarven script written around the outside of the gold band. The ring itself contains but a single piece of mithril sculpted like a mountain rising some two inches above the band of the ring.

“Bard!” Xanthos shouts, grabbing Haimish around the collar and yanking him ten feet over to be in front of Xanthos, causing Haimish to drop the ring, “I need you to identify this rock. I believe it to be my frozen heart, devoid of the passion it once had.” 

Haimish begins to object, but then notices Kourk picking up the ring and slipping it on his finger, “Hey!”

Haimish turns to go have a chat with Kourk who looks around frantically trying to see who or what Haimish could have been yelling at. Xanthos instead grabs the bard once more by the collar and raises him into the air.

“First indentify.” Xanthos demands pointing at the rock below.

“Fine, fine.” Haimish answers

Haimish finishes his incantation with a quizzical look on his face.

“What? What’s wrong with my heart?” Xanthos requests

“I don’t think that’s your heart.” Haimish replies

“What? What is it then?” Xanthos asks wiping his blood soaked hands off on Haimish’s cloak.

“I don’t know it is beyond my capabilities to unravel it’s secrets.” Haimish answers

“Dejected, Xanthos slouches onto his knees, then transforms back to a wild elf and passes out, exhausted from the toll the implanted heart has already taken on his body

Haimish quietly picks up the rock and wraps it in cloth five layers deep, while the rest of the party goes through the piles of gold and other items. Kourk finds a helmet as well and places that upon his head. 

“Hey look, a mace too!” Kourk states, “Now I’m a helmeted loin-cloth basher in search of zealots.” 

Menthos walks out of the room with a new item he located in a stack of scrolls, “Hey Minty, find anything useful?” Haimish asks

“Yes, your skill at deduction. Here ID this.” Menthos answers, showing a metal rod into the bard’s face

*sigh* Haimish grabs the metal stick and concentrates on the item, after a few moments he tells Menthos, “It’s a warlock rod…” Menthos cuts him off.

“Really? I’m going to stick this onto the top of my ten foot pole and then I’ll be able to blast things ten feet further away than what I could do. What’s it do?” Menthos asks

“You use it to detect reality, hit your head against it anywhere from seven to four-hundred seventy-three times and you should start to see the meaning of all life.’ Haimish answers

Doopa grabs up Xanthos as well, and the party continues along the new path past the treasure room door. They come upon another door with low moaning and anguished cries from the other side.

Haimish and Kourk shove the door open to reveal a torture chamber used by the orcs to slowly kill their captives. A male dwarf lies stretched a top the rack as his ribs show sings of internally bleeding, blackened and blue skin run  along his rib cage.

“Please save me.” The pitiful dwarf calls out

Haimish rushes to the man’s side as he pounds the chains of the rack with his sword until the dwarf is freed. Haimish offers the man food and water and helps him out into the hallway, “Who would do this? Xanthos is missing a great party”

Back out in the hallway, the party is transfixed upon Menthos as the teifling halts fifteen feet from the torture chamber, a long hallway stretched out before them, darkened except for the floor which glows with the light of a full moon.

“Trapped.” Is all Menthos says

“Crap, we’ll have to go back up the long way.” Haimish states

“No need, we can get through this, plus it’s quicker and with two unconscious people and two others that are practically useless.” Menthos answers

“What are you going to do then?” Haimish inquires

Menthos grabs the saved dwarf and shoves him into the hallway while shouting “Freedom!”
 Haimish tries to stop the Menthos but is too late to halt the toss that lands him in the hallway, “What are you doing!” Haimish shouts

“Saving us.” Menthos replies, the dwarf pushes himself up to a crawling position and begins to crawl away from the party, after ten feet of crawling the sounds of dozens of dogs baying echo up the hallway.

The dwarf freezes and turns around to crawl back to the party; Menthos retrieves his ten foot pole and prods the dwarf to keep him from getting any closer. Haimish attempts to grapple the warlock down to the floor and succeeds in knocking the teifling prone. The baying intensifies as Haimish shoves himself off of Menthos and steps towards the hallway to help the dwarf. 

Menthos kicks his feet out and drops Haimish to his knees and eye level with the dwarf who reaches out his arm for help. Haimish reaches up but is knocked back by a dozen large red dogs who phase through the black “wall” of the corridor and tear into the dwarf as if he was the last scrap of meat the hounds would ever see again.

The screams from the dwarf were intermixed with a fiery belch from the hound’s mouths as the heat in the hallway and surrounding the party increased. Blood splatter paints Haimish and Menthos the later rolls away and stands up next to Adukol, Haimish reels in the brutality of the scene as the hounds leave nothing, not even hair, completely ignoring the party the leave as quickly and as unquiet as they arrived. 

“Nasty little trap, does it reset or have you tripped it?” Adukol asks

“I don’t know, go find me another prisoner and we’ll find out.” Menthos replies

“Kourk seems to be grating on people’s attitudes.” Adukol subtly suggests

“You’re pretty useless right now too.” Menthos answers

“True, but I know offense. What does his god know?” Adukol replies

“You should be wary of faith, I know many powerful men who could bend your opinion of faith.” Menthos states

“Not likely, I have no need for gods. Not when _cloudkill_ works so much better.” Adukol replies

“Each of us has tithes that bind.” Menthos says and leaves Adukol, walks over to Haimish and hefts him up from the ground.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Chased*

Haimish pushes the teifling away, “I don’t want your help. How could you have even thought that was a good solution?”

“Better him than you or I.” Menthos answers

Haimish tries to argue but pulls back as Menthos begins to cross the strange hallway. The warlock feels the temperature rising around him as the walls shimmer with heat. Haimish and Adokul call out behind him but their voices seem farther away then their actual distance. The barking of hounds can be heard off in the distance beyond the walls, their sound getting louder and drowning out all other noises. The stone walls melt away, giving Menthos the impression of walking along a dirt path in hell.

A blood red sun hangs bloated on a distant horizon; the air is dry and hot and seems full of black dust, choking off any deep breaths the teifling might try to take. A few more steps and the hounds reappear up through a crevasse and race towards the warlock, turning back; Menthos finds no path behind him and no sight of the rest of the party. Menthos fires off eldritch blast after eldritch blast but neither pack is slowed. Menthos kneels down and braces for impact as the hounds’ mouths open and a fire drool laps at the hounds’ face. 

“Kador save me.” Menthos says closing his eyes to the expected pain; the words seemed to come freely of their own will.

The hounds leapt for the attack, but land just short of Menthos. The tiefling, although protected against most mundane heat and fire, could feel the hot breath of the hell hounds as they circled him, flicking their fiery tongues to taste the air around the teifling. Satisfied with their findings, the hounds back off and run back towards the crevasse from whence they came. 

Opening his eyes, Menthos finds himself in a small square room; a single pedestal stands in the center, an orange light streams from above and lands on the pedestal. Rising to his feet, Menthos spots a small vial resting atop the pedestal. Using his ability to detect magic, Menthos opens his mind to the flow of power through the room. The vial shows as magical, but nothing else however. 

Replaying the hound attack through his mind, Menthos wondered what he did differently than the dwarf that was eaten. Unless, the attack was illusionary and the dwarf was still alive in a room such as this, imprisoned as Menthos was now feeling. Feeling paranoid, Menthos scoured the walls of the small twenty foot square room, looking for an exit. After fifteen minutes of fruitless searching the teifling finds his prize, a concealed door in the wall behind him where he had been kneeling when he arrived. 

Menthos pushed the door aside and it slid with a grating sound of centuries of disuse. Peering into the dark hallway beyond, Menthos saw unfamiliar landmarks and most of all no one around. Pushing the door the rest of the way open, he listened for signs that his escape had altered something to come looking for epicenter of the noise. After several minutes of silence, he felt relived that nothing was coming; he turned back to the pedestal and grabbed the vial. 

The glass was cold to the touch, colder than any ice Menthos had ever felt and the black liquid within look thick enough to double as paste. He put the vial in his backpack and started off down the hallway away from the pedestal room. 

Haimish and Adokul however watched as the hounds leapt upon the cowering Menthos and then disappeared along with the warlock. The hallway returned to normal and there were no signs of the tiefling. 

“Well, that settles it; I’m not going down that hallway.” Adokul states

“What an idiot.” Haimish comments about Menthos

“Hey he could have thrown you into the hallway; at least he had the decency to commit suicide.” Adokul responds

“Mmm, something’s different though; they didn’t tear into Menthos and didn’t leave remains behind like the dwarf’s.” Haimish observed

 “Maybe they needed him intact, maybe it’s all an illusion and he teleported somewhere else?” Adokul suggests

“You want to try that theory?” Haimish asks

Adokul looks down the hallway and then at the dwarf’s remains, “Not so much.” 

Haimish and Adokul set up a makeshift camp along with a small barricade that would slow down the first couple of attackers, and then set about nursing the rest of the party back to health. Xanthos and Eeyore awoke from their paralysis and were told of the trap and the supposed fate of Menthos. In the morning Kourk and Doopa were healed and spell prayed enough to warrant a trek back out of the dungeon, as no one dared try the trap out for authenticity.

The retreat back through the dungeon was a lonely one; the party came across no further combatants or obstacles. They called out for Menthos as they went, but no reply was every given. Once back outside they party noted the snowfall had increased as was nearly hip high while drifts formed that were taller than any of them except Doopa. 

“What do we do about Menthos?” Haimish asks

“Nothing, we need to get myself and Eeyore fixed, otherwise we’re useless to any search party.” Xanthos answers

“We can’t just leave him here; this is an indignant way to die. You ought to be ashamed of yourself.” Kourk states

“Well, look who went and got all righteous. Your god tell you to be a nonconformist this morning?” Adokul asks

“No, but he did relate to me how it was that you came in contact with the slaad.” Kourk replies

“Right. I doubt that highly.” Adokul scoffs and moves out in front of the party looking out over Hledra

“As would I had it not come from my own liege.” Kourk answers

“What happened?” Eeyore speaks up

“Nothing, I was kidnapped, this charlatan knows not what he speaks.” Adokul answers

“Awfully defensive, perhaps you are not who you claim or appear to be?” Eeyore comments

“You’re a little paranoid for someone who could wind up paralyzed at the moments notice, making for an easy kill. You think about last night and me with access to a knife all night.” Adokul makes a subtle threat.

“Enough, we’ve no time for this. I head for Highcastle, I need to find someone who knows where a slithilar can be found.” Xanthos shouts

The party lumbers back to Kindoras Keep, picks up horses for the party and then set off as quickly as druid and ranger driven horses can go. The second night in the cairns they party was attacked by a pair of retrievers who teleported into the camp’s center. They were easily dispatched but that only raised the alert of the group.

“We’re being tracked extra-dimensionally” Xanthos stated

“That means we’re being scryed.” Adokul states

“Somebody or something wants something we have.” Kourk laments

“We need to hurry, no more rests, we need to make Highcastle by tomorrow nightfall.” Xanthos commands

The party gathers up their belongings and push the horses through the night south to Highcastle. They ride through the day and spot the towers of the city as the sun slips below the western horizon. Three retrievers appear in the road ahead, the party breaks off and swerves to miss them as the chase is on.

The three demons dimension door just ahead of Haimish’s horse and extend their claws as the horse rides buy them. The retrievers score deep gashes across the flanks of the horse. Haimish gets a hundred more feet out of the animal before it collapses. Doopa rides up to the retrievers and clubs the nearest one upside the head as he rides by. The demon swipes at Doopa’s horse and tears a fist sized hunk of meat from its hindquarters. Doopa tries to make a sharp turn with the horse, but exhausted and limping the animal crumples to the ground instead. Doopa kicks out from under the horse and turns to face the demons.

Xanthos however rides by Doopa and scopes him up as Eeyore rides out to Haimish and scopes him up as well. Kourk and Adokul, not wanting to be easy pickings for the retrievers, ride in close to the new formation as well. 

“They’re just going to picking off our horses and force us into fighting a ground war.” Eeyore shouts

“Then we’ll have to fight.” Xanthos states

“No, I have a better plan.” Haimish relates

As the retriever teleport in front of the horses again, Haimish _dimension doors _ himself, Eeyore, Kourk, and Adokul nearly seven hundred feet down the path without their horses. Xanthos transforms into a giant eagle and grasps Doopa then lefts off into the air. The confused retrievers attack the horses as they scatter to avoid the retrievers. Once realizing where the party went, they activate their teleportation, this delay allowed Haimish to _dimension door _ again and make the final five hundred feet into Highcastle. 

The retrievers do not seem to follow the party into Highcastle, Xanthos lands with Doopa shortly thereafter. The party makes their way to the School of Ancient Magic where they demand an audience. The party explains their predicament and is advised there is a Slithilar on Croy the Isle of Magic, but transport is not free and if they wish to be cured of their graphs, the price would be the graph itself. The party agrees, Doopa stays behind as he does not wish to hang out with a bunch of magic types, and he states he’ll go talk to the fire people about Menthos. The rest of the party is teleported to Croy where surgery for Xanthos and Eeyore begins within the hour.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> The rest of the party is teleported to Croy where surgery for Xanthos and Eeyore begins within the hour.




I gotta tell you, HM. I think that half of my current party would probably want to keep the grafts rather than part with them - despite the defects.

And I must say, "Retrievers! Why didn't I think of that?"

I just love campaign cross-pollenization.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> I gotta tell you, HM. I think that half of my current party would probably want to keep the grafts rather than part with them - despite the defects.
> 
> And I must say, "Retrievers! Why didn't I think of that?"
> 
> I just love campaign cross-pollenization.




Xanthos wasn't having any issues with his, other than character driven to find his own heart instead of a replacement. 

Eeyore however kept freezing in battle (not reflected in the story hour as those battles were generally party squashes) so he was all about getting it taken off. Plus it stayed with him when he would shift forms (he's an aranea).

And I do think Huzair and Menthos are long lost brothers. Although Menthos is about to "shack up" with the dark side.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Something ventured, Something gained*

As the ethereal veil is lifted, the Isle of Croy comes into focus. A large platform emerges underneath the party’s feet, arcane runes glow a soft blue and then fade. The island proper then comes into view as the glistening water reflects the high sun. Xanthos notes that most buildings have no roof and are open to the sky. The School of Ancient Knowledge representative heads off to the east as a dozen clay golems move in to surround the party.

“Take the one in all black and the elf to Krizz’t’ck’s lab, the rest are to be move into quarters.” A copper-hued half-dragon commands from the right of the party behind the line of golems.

Xanthos and Eeyore are taken immediately inside a tower-like structure, within are eleven archways arranged in the interior marble wall of the tower. They look to be decorative as there is nothing but marble on the other side of them. Each arch protrudes from the wall about a foot and all are covered with arcane symbols. The golem lead Xanthos and Eeyore to an arch just to the right of the entrance, with a slight shove the two men are pushed towards the wall at the back of the arch, a momentary flinch in anticipation of their face hitting stone goes by unanswered as they are teleported again to a hot and dark room with a small stove fire burning.

“Come lay down on the tables.” A voice speaks to their minds

The light increases in intensity and grows to illuminate a pair of thick wooden tables to either side of the stove fireplace. The golems don’t move to prod the men to the tables; Xanthos and Eeyore stare at each other for a moment before complying with the request. After tentatively seating themselves a large bug creature with long stick-like arms emerges from behind the stove and moves in-between the two men. 

“I am Krizz’t’ck and I have heard you are afflicted with one of my people’s toys. Tell me, how was it that you came to possess these things.” The slithilar requests

“To move about the island, you will need to possess a gate key. Otherwise you will be forced to stay in a guest room until the completion of your friends’ surgery. There are many keys, however only one opens all the doors. The key I give you today will allow you to visit the marketplace and the above ground parts of the island. Do not lose your key as a replacement will not be granted and keys become inert after you leave the island and are not rechargeable.” The half-dragon states.

Adokul is given a small skull of a pixie and is told to wear it around his neck to pass through doors. Any doors he goes through will lead him to the marketplace, above ground on the island, or back to his own room. A golem approaches Haimish with a similar skull.

“Wait.” The half-dragon orders, “That one already possesses a key.” 

The words confused Haimish, maybe it was the bleeding rock they found? Or some other item? Or maybe the dragon was mistaken for whatever reason. Haimish was sure none of the items he’d cast _detect magic _ on resonated with anything that could be used as a teleport key.

The dragon next spoke to Kourk, “You are not arcane and therefore not allowed free reign in our city. You will be confined to your room and made to wait there. You may request a guide to show you the above grounds, but that is all.”

“How xenophobic of you. I appreciate your respect for my power.” Kourk responded.

The half-dragon merely scoffed and waved the golem to lead Kourk to his room, “The rest of you are free to go where your limitations restrict you.” And with that the golems and the half-dragon blinked away.

“You never mentioned you had been here before. Where are the places one should see while they are here?” Adokul asks Haimish

Haimish didn’t readily answer as he was going over his inventory in his mind, trying to locate what the key might be, “huh? Oh sorry. Um, try the oracle. I’ve heard the readings she gives you will move you to switch convictions.” 

“Sounds interesting, I think I’ll try that first. Let’s see how does this thing wor..” and with a thought Adokul to teleported to the steps of a great shrine. Massive pillars support a dome of night, in that the very night sky could be viewed from within the shrine. Resting within a mound of pillows lay a six-armed woman with the body of a snake. 

Haimish wanders off the platform with no clear goal and walks among the residents of the island, he sees stone giant runecasters, mind flayers, ghoul sorcerers, elementals of all shapes sizes and even some that appeared to be only rumored in texts attributed to hacks. It wasn’t until his first hour on the island had passed that he noticed all the wizard eyes floating about. They seemed to be everywhere, small disembodied eyeballs floating in midair, constantly watching and recording everything that went on in their field of vision. Even though he had been told to freely wander the outside island, Haimish couldn’t help but think this was more like prison, and with that thought Haimish was whisked away.

Kourk found his room to be simple yet functional, his found he liked that. He couldn’t remember why he liked free from art so much, heck even a week ago he was battering for an exclusive piece of “living” art when the slaad craftsman he was dealing with became insulted with his offer and decided Kourk should pay for the piece with his life. He had also done some soul searching in the past 24 hours and thought that his faith might be better served under the thumb of a deity who wasn’t so fickle. Maybe a good dwarven god would do the trick? Someone who appreciated a good day’s work and had simple rules that were easily discernable and followed. Kourk sifted through his knowledge of divinity searching for a good candidate to switch his allegiance to, he never considered that his current deity would be upset by this, after all Kourk had logically thought this whole process out and it just made sense to him and that should be all the convincing his current god needed. 

After Xanthos and Eeyore relayed their stories to the slithilar, the bug-like creature stroked what amounted to its chin in contemplation of what might have corrupted the devices. 

“It is clear to me that the grafts will have to be removed, spider-shifter you will have to remain unconscious in a growth tube while a new organic skin is regenerated to re-clothe yourself, this will be a minor inconvenience for me and should conclude two days hence.” The slithilar communicated

“Druid your extraction will be a little more of a hassle as I shall have to re-implant a functioning device where your current one is removed, I hope to avoid death, but grafts are usually not meant to be swapped as if one was in a market.” The creature relays to Xanthos

Xanthos sends a quick _sending_ to Adokul to have him pick up a belt of healing while he shops on the island, before the slithilar psychically knocks out the patients and begins his surgery. 

Adokul slowly ascends the white marble steps that sharply contrast with the dark interior ceiling of the shrine. His steps resonate with a low moaning sound that unnerves him and he stops midway up the steps. Taking a deep breath he looks around for any other visitors hoping to see he wasn’t the only one hearing the noise. 

“Adokul, pick me up a belt of healing from a merchant on the island.” Xanthos’ voice echoed through the mage’s head startling Adokul and causing him to stumble forward falling on the steps two thirds of the way up.

Cursing to himself, the sorcerer readies to lift himself up, but several hands grasp his robes and heft him off the steps completely. Adokul tries to squirm his way free, but his whipping head snaps forward and he looks into the demonic eyes of the maralith.

“I grow tired of waiting for you to produce enough testosterone to finish your climb. The oracle does not like to be kept waiting, there are several other suitors who are waiting to paying for her services.” The maralith states

“You’re not the oracle?” Adokul asks

“No, I am a handmaiden. The oracle waits below in the melancholy below the sky.” The maralith speaks and tosses Adokul skidding into the shrine. Dust clouds kick up as the human missile tumbles over the stone floor. Adokul coughs out what dust was breathed in during his travel and shoves himself off the ground. It wasn’t until his head was receding from the floor that he realized the floor was made of compacted bone ground to dust. The taste caught the back of his tongue as he coughed it up. To someone with spellcraft the taste is unforgettable. 

Large black bat wings unfurled from the center of the pillow pit and a stunningly beautiful woman rose with the wings. Veins of red ran over the wings giving Adokul the impression of a field of lava on a black landscape. He’d only read about succubi before and from what his brain was scurrying to bring back paled in comparison with the real thing which stood in all her glory before him. 

“You seek the Oracle of Croy to aid you in a matter of importance?” The succubus cooed 

Adokul’s brain screamed “danger!” but his heart had already surrendered and was sewing a white flag with his soul, “Sure, can you help me with my question?” 

*chuckle* “What do you have in payment for this mighty knowledge that I will bestow upon you?” The succubus answered

Adokul shook off the effects of the succubus’ hold on his will and he turned his back to the creature and tried to imagine annis hags eating gelatinous cubes full of pus. However the image of the succubus kept overlaying anything vile and disgusting his brain could dream up. Adokul willed his legs backwards, shuffling his feet across the bone dust floor.

“Leaving so soon? We haven’t even negotiated my rate yet. Please stay for a while, I’ve no one else to talk to and the maralith is nearly useless as a pleasure toy and it’s been so long since anyone has paid the price of my knowledge.” The succubus’ words peel away Adokul’s resolve in layers as he slows his retreat.

“Hey Adokul! Did you get my message?” Xanthos’ shouting shattered through Adokul’s skull and the distraction enabled him to refocus on fleeing and he picked up his feet and ran out of the shrine never looking back.

“I need a brothel.” Adokul thought to himself and instantly he stood inside an underground cavern full of store fronts and all manner of arcane beings as they went abut battering and shopping for sundries.

 “Looking for a good time are you?” A pixie startled Adokul’s senses back to his immediate surroundings

The building to his left was dark inside and an overwhelming smell of incense wafted outside of it. The sign on the door merely said “professionals” in about twenty different languages.

“Well? Are we dealing here? Cause if you’re not then you need to get a move on you’re blocking others views of the place.” The pixie said

Adokul focused on the pixie that was obviously interrupted on her way to or from the shower as her lack of clothes indicated. Adokul’s danger meter was broken and it would take several therapy sessions to get it to work right, and with that Adokul reached into his purse and shoved a handful of gold in the pixie’s face.

“That’ll do nicely human.” And the pixie motioned for Adokul to follow


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*An old enemy returns*

Darkness assailed Haimish’s sight as he whipped around trying to locate where he was exactly. The echoing sound of water dripping led him to believe he was in a cave or underground as least. Haimish dug a sunrod out from his backpack and activated it. The room lit up in a burst of sight, corners long since denied light were exposed as insects, moles, and rats skittered away from the brightness. 

A solitary coffin lay against the right wall and a ventilation hole no more than four inches across provided the room with the stale air that Haimish was breathing. Haimish looked along the base of the walls for where the rats and moles scattered from the room and made the horrible discovery that they were plagued. Large chucks of hair had fallen from their skin and the rat’s tails looked more like shriveled calamari than a tail. He shifted the light again and one of the moles stared back at him with half a face, its one remaining eye was bloated and bulging from its socket. 

“Undead, great.” Haimish sighed

Then a smoke began to fill the room from the ceiling port, Haimish backed away from the hole but noticed the smoke moved in a sentient way, contorting itself to avoid Haimish. Remembering his encounter with a vampire previously, Haimish struck his blade on the coffin, trying to knock off a good enough sized piece of wood to shove it into the creature’s heart. 

The mist formed a body and Haimish renewed his efforts to hack off a piece of wood. A familiar visage formed from the mist and Haimish stopped hacking, dumbfounded the bard stood as the rest of the body formed and Kalen stood before him.

“Since there are only two ways into this room, and you’re not a vampire, it limits my choices down nicely.” Kalen states

“How?” Haimish questions

“Interesting, for that is my question as well.” Kalen states

“You’ll not find my mind so easily taken this time Kalen.” Haimish spits back

“Pfft. I don’t want it. I have an idyllic life here, you would just disrupt that. However I can’t really let you go back to the rustic civilizations with this knowledge either. What to do, what to do?” Kalen answers

A wizard eye popped into existence in the far corner of the room, Kalen’s face showed obvious displeasure with this turn of events.

“Tell you what, meet me and my associates for lunch on the observation deck in one hour and we can discuss particulars.” Kalen offered

“Particulars of what?” Haimish inquired

“Even now your humorous side shows it shall do you well in the coming meeting.” Kalen says and returns to mist form and ascends the air hole.

“Wait! How the hell am I supposed to get out of here?” Haimish shouts up at the disappearing Kalen, “Damn, I wish I was with Adokul.” And with that Haimish is whisked away again.

It took a moment for Haimish’s eyes to adjust to the odd lighting in this room. A large mirrored ball hung from the ceiling and slowly turned as the light from a couple of candles reflected off of its surface to splash the room in dozens of small points of light. Then he heard odd breathing that raised his alertness as he spun around awaiting the charging barbarian only to find a more disturbing sight.

“Aaahhh!!!” Haimish screamed

“Aaahhhh!!!” Adokul screamed

“What? Hey, that’ll cost you more.” The pixie said pointing at Haimish 

“Aaahhh!!!” Haimish screamed again

“What? How? You?” Adokul screamed

“There’s no place like home, there’s no place like home.” Haimish repeated

“What kind of sick twisted plane are you two from?” The pixie questions

“Get the hell out of here Haimish!” Adokul shouts 

Haimish blinks away while shutting his eyes so tightly he hoped they’d never open again.

“Is this some kind of bet? Are more of your friends going to keep popping in here with you? Cause if they are, you’re going to need to pay for them too.” The pixie iterates

Haimish finds himself in a small apartment overlooking the west side of the island. He notes that the position of the sun hasn’t changed from when he first arrived and wonders if any time really passed at all.

“Haimish my good man, what brings you back from your excursion across the island?” Kourk asks heartily

Haimish turns to face Kourk, sweaty and red-faced the bard shrugs his shoulders and stares back at the cleric.

“Are you in need of healing? Moradin has answered my prayers!” Kourk relates

Haimish shakes his head, “No, I have a business luncheon.” 

“Ah! Perhaps you are in need of a shave? Let me get you my razor, I no longer have need of it.” Kourk states

“No, that’s okay. I just need to drop off a few things before I head off to eat.” Haimish answer

“Why certainly my good man. Perhaps we can chat later regarding your findings on this most peculiar island?” Kourk replies

“Sure.” Haimish answers and heads to the privy where he unloads most of his valuables. Keeping his gold and sword on him though, he removes the odd rock from his back pack to find that the rate of bleeding has increased and the rock appears smaller, almost as if the rock was ice and was melting.

“Great what am I going to do with this? I can’t leave it here; Kourk’s gone all weird on me this place must be affecting his brain. I’ll have to take it with me instead.” Haimish re-wraps the rock and places it back into his backpack. His thinks about the observation deck but nothing happens.

Haimish remembers his two previous jumps and also what the half-dragon told them. He then starts handling each of his dropped items one by one and thinking about the observation deck until he comes to the jar of grave dirt and is whisked away. Haimish stands on the observation deck and smiles, he then thinks back to the room and returns to the privy in the party’s apartment. 

Haimish begins to clean up the red liquid the rock left on the floor, passing the cloths to the laundry bin Haimish gets a strong acrid smell like that of blood. The bard pauses and considers this problem, then putting a little bit of the liquid on his fingers he tastes it with his tongue and the world goes dark.

Haimish’s head is filled with images of a great black dragon being dragged down into a large cavern, massive cords of rope loop over the dragon’s girth and cut through it’s skin down to the bone. Huge wooden skewers are passed through the great beast and you feel each of their entries; smell the rotten blood wells up from the wounds as large hunks of flesh fall from the body. A great cry from the dragon is cut short as blood curdles into it's throat cutting off the air flow. All is silent for a moment before a great gout of blood geysers forth from it's mouth. 

Haimish’s head spin back into his present location, his body bleeding from multiple stab wounds. A great pressure in his throat wells up and he hurls open his eyes wide as he projectile vomits a gallon of blood, spraying the room in a crimson wash. Woozy and exhausted, Haimish claws his way to a sitting position and vows never to do that dumb stunt again. 

Haimish teleports to the observation deck after getting cleaned up, but notices in the mirror that he is very pale but decides to meet with Kalen anyway. The bard is met on the deck by Kalen and a wizard wearing robes with the School of Ancient Knowledge insignia on it. 

“Glad to see you made it. You look dreadfully pale though, are you felling alright?” Kalen inquires

“Sure, just doing some calisthenics.” The bard replies

“Please be seated then.” Kalen shows Haimish to his chair, he notes they are the only ones dinning now, but there are seven wizard eyes floating about watching.

Kalen notices Haimish’s observation, “Seems you’ve attracted great interest.” 

“Appears so, at least I feel safer.” Haimish answers

“Did you feel as though you were in some kind of danger?” Kalen asks with a wry grin

“No, I already beat you once.” Haimish answers much to the vampire’s chagrin

Haimish is treated to a decadent feast of; Cream of Flumph, Ettin Tartar, and Poached Faerie Dragon Egg in Shell with a Zombie Béarnaise Sauce. 

Kalen then leans in, “What do you want for the item? We can deal now and avoid others mucking up the deal.” 

Confused Haimish is taken aback and is about to ask what Kalen is taking about when a rakshasa teleports next to the table.

“Tricky undead, you thought to buy it outright without letting anyone else see it? I have the mind to turn you over to Ghornas for this insult.” The rakshasa comments, Kalen just rolls his eyes in disgust.

The appearance of the rakshasa brings a gnome and erinyes teleporting in as well; they too stake a claim in the proceedings. 

Menthos makes his way back out of the dungeons of Hledra amid a swirling snowstorm, the teifling scours the landscape for signs the party made it out as well, barring that he scours the city in hopes of gauging just how long he’d been gone. The deep snow however, covers most of the buildings and what structures he does see are only ruins anyway. He trudges out of Hledra heading west in hopes that Kindoras Keep still stands.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*The rabbitt done died*

“What item are you talking about?” Haimish pleads

“Why the blood of Thynuklith of course, isn’t that why you’re here to unload it?” The gnome answers

“You mean this rock?” Haimish produces the wrapped, large, and cold object from his backpack

Oohing and ahhing erupt from around the table as Haimish catches the glimpse of a mummy lumbering up behind him in the glistening of the ice chunk. 

“Lord Ina-Herit shall not be denied this opportunity.” The mummy speaks and shoves the gnome out of his seat. Then sits in the now empty chair

“Recompense! This shall get reported.” The gnome squeals

“Run along mosquito, or the next time you cut a deal it’ll be for which organ of yours I atrophy first.” Lord Ina-Herit hisses

Disappointed but apparently sufficiently intimidated the gnome teleports away from the table.

“Can we conclude this now?” Kalen sighs

“Hold your tongue soulless, I wish to savoir the hunt of the find first.” The erinyes speaks

Kalen opened his mouth to object when their waiter brought over a fried gelatinous cube with bearded devil sauce for dessert. 

“So recitalist, tell your tale.” The erinyes requests

Haimish recites the party’s trip through Hledra, the mummy drawing particular interest to the ghost dragon, while the erinyes has Haimish repeat the altar altercation with Menthos four times, laughing more gleefully with each retelling.

“Where is this maniac? I saw no teifling with you when your troupe arrived.” The erinyes inquires

“We don’t know where he is; he went through some fiendish hell hound trap and never saw him again.” Haimish answers

“Lucky bastard.” The erinyes replies

“Where is this Hledra, I may have need to finish your pathetic plundering job.” Lord Ina-Herit asks

“Find your own guide; take out an advertisement, commune, or guess. Any of those work just as well.” Haimish answers

“I like the cut of you jib bard. Is there something special you want for your birthday?” The erinyes inquires

“No, as for payment for this highly valuable, collector’s prize of an artifact. I’m a bard, use your imaginations. I predict you’ll do well.” Haimish advises

“My liege has already informed me to make the winning bid, let us retire to come to an agreement.” Lord Ina-Herat

Ina-Herit’s comments enrage the table as female drow shows up as well, berating Kalen for delaying her attendance at such an important occasion. The drow snatches a chair from a nearby table, spins it and sits as close to Haimish as possible while simultaneously blocking Lord Ina-Hiret’s view.

“Well, human?” The drow says

“I like games, you all like games? We’re going to play a game now and the winner shall get certain considerations on their bid.” Haimish states

“Lolth demands the item at all cost!” The drow shouts

Haimish thought to ask her what Orcus thought of that, but remembered a mummy had shown up talking about his liege and he figured he had just made a connection on that.

“I have a planer rift to the elemental plane of ice, whoever can tell me how to close it, shall get a greater place amongst the bids.” Haimish says

“What’s that supposed to mean?” The drow says

“It means I won’t accept any bids from those with no answer to my question.” Haimish says, and with that the rakshasa, drow, and erinyes teleport out to find the answer while the two undeads remain at the table. 

“Aren’t you going to run off and find the answer to my question?” Haimish asks

“No need, I have your answer.” Ina-Hiret states

“So then give me your bid.” Haimish replies

“No, give me the item first and you shall have your answer.” The mummy says

“Not likely, if you don’t want to be a good sport, then don’t even bother submitting a bid and you can go about rotting your existence away somewhere else.” Haimish responds 

“I will not leave this place without the rock, if it does not come by me through your hands then it will come by through others. One thing is certain, it will be mine to present to my liege.” Ina-Herit challenges

Haimish ignores the ranting mummy next to him and focuses on Kalen who sits motionless.

“You don’t get it either, not without my answer.” Haimish talks over the mummy at Kalen

“Quite.” Kalen replies and snaps his fingers and a green robed man from the School of Ancient knowledge approaches the table from behind Haimish.

“Search the cellar library area fifty-one and find this book.” Kalen shows the man a slip of paper, “bring the book back here and be quick.” 

The man teleports off, “you’ll have your answer post haste.” Kalen advises

“Must be nice to have the school at your fingertips.” Haimish implies, “I wonder what the Mormekar’s think of that?”

“They think nothing; the dead are useless except for spare parts. However much like my desiccated friend here stated so eloquently. You will give me the rock now.” Kalen held his right hand out as his eyes flashed red for a moment.

“Ha! You’re a one trick pony with a bad leg. Here’s to hoping your nanny brings back the right book or you’re going to lose.” Haimish says

Menthos made it back to Kindoras Keep nine days after exiting Hledra, his only company on the trip was the nasty weather and packs of wolves. No other intelligent life wandered outside in a Majestic Blizzard. Menthos was happy to see the keep still standing and the columns of smoke meant the pyromancers finally got around to lighting something useful. Too tired to deal with the captain, Menthos spider climbed over the wall and crossed the courtyard into the priest quarters, both happy and irked that he was able to do so without so much as a yell to “stop!” 

He stumbled down the hallway to his own room and collapsed on the bed. It was early evening the next day before he arose to find his room was doubling as a storage closet as well. Boxes and crates were piled across the northern wall a smell of paste hung faintly in the air, Menthos thought there must be some wet flour in some of the boxes. Menthos stretches the journey from his muscles and gets up to have a look around the cold keep.

The hallway outside his room was quiet as he walked down to Aleena’s quarters, hoping to catch her before her sundown sermon. Lightly rapping on her door brought a fiery, “Leave me the hell alone!” then soft sobbing. Menthos tries to push the door open but it is barred from the other side, so he elects to spend the next few minutes pouring eldritch blasts over the door until it disintegrates under the onslaught. 

“What did you do that for? Now I’m going to have to replace that.” Aleena calls out from a desk on the far side of the room.

“I just love it when you talk all spiritual like that.” Menthos replies, hoping for a hug or a glad you’re safe greeting, “what no hug?”

“I’m not feeling well, I’ve been throwing up all week and I ache in tender places.” Aleena answers

“Withdrawal, very common I women I’ve met, luckily I’m back so you can get your fix.” Menthos says proudly

“I don’t think that’s the problem at all.” Aleena says

“Says you, what do you know you’re just a cleric of a fire god, maybe you should consult a liaison to the fire god instead? I’ll be taking requests all day.” Menthos says

Aleena smiles weakly and inquires as to Menthos’ travels this past two weeks. Menthos relates his story and hands over the vial for inspection as well. Aleena can’t give anymore information than Menthos already has so she returns the item to Menthos. At the end of his narrative Menthos asks to speak with Helle or Statinistor about Hledra. Aleena advises she will set that up after giving the sundown address to the keep.

Aleena gives Menthos a kiss as she leaves the room with a deliberate walk. After judging her to be far enough along the hallway, Menthos finds the secret door near the far left corner of Aleena’s room that he found exploring one night. Opening it to reveal the small chamber with a large brazier in the middle. The warlock pours oil over the coals and ignites them creating a brilliant rush of yellow and oranges as the flame charges into the ceiling of the chamber. A few moments later the visage of Statinistor appears in the fire and addresses the teifling.

“Menthos, tis good to know you escaped unharmed along with your companions.” Statinistor states

“Oh, so they made it out alive without me did they? Where are they now?” Menthos asks

“On an off-shifted island called Troy, they are being harassed by retrievers among other things. Although your ogre friend remains in Highcastle.” Statinistor answers

“Hmm. Then my plan worked, they escaped while I have the treasure?” Menthos comments

“Yes, yes. Toy with them and make them think you are weaker, then when they finally sense they are about to die, the grim realization that they were too cocky to fight effectively destroys whatever will to fight on that they had left. Excellent choice of tactics.” Statinistor replies

“What’s wrong Aleena?” Menthos inquires

“Such concern for your fellow man.” Statinistor begins, Menthos couldn’t tell if the priest was being sarcastic or genuine, “Although you should know, you caused it.”

“That was a joke back there with the withdrawal comment.” Menthos answers

“Yes, but the facts remain. You got her pregnant.” Statinistor answers

“Ah crap. This is what ruined my brother Tehas’ life, what happens now?” Menthos asked, hoping the answer didn’t involve a lot of skin flailing or soul melting.

“Nothing it will be dealt with when the time comes, for now why don’t you step into the brazier and return to Highcastle, there is much to show you.” Statinistor answered.

“I need to corral a few things here first, but as long as I have you on the prompter. What do you know about a temple under Hledra?” Menthos asks explaining the altar and big undead fight they fled from.

"I know of no temple below Hledra, this concerns me as there must be some kind of deific presence if blade barriers were cast and temples are still functioning." Statinistor answers

“What of this prophesy that almost paralyzed the pyromancers?” Menthos asks

"Prophesies are vague enough that they could be applied almost anywhere, Kador tells me there is a growing darkness to the north. But most concerning to us is the spread of disease ahead of this early winter, the Morwynites can't keep up with the amount of sick and dying that lay upon their doorstep." Statinistor replies

“How can I stop the gate from creating this weather?” Menthos asks

"The magic of this year's early winter is neither arcane nor divine, it most resembles your ability, yet not the same." Statinistor answers

“Your answer sucks.” Menthos retorts, “What’s been going on down there lately?” 

"Our repeated attempts to sanction the School of Ancient Knowledge, have met with disaster. There is now open hostility between us and we believe they have subverted agents within the Courts of Maal. Be wary of the school, we no longer send solitary priests out from the temple. They never return. We also find it odd that the Church of Mormekar has chosen to publicly denounce the School of Ancient Knowledge for some reason. Going so far as to even dispute land grants which are trivial and I cannot recollect the last time anyone disputed this simple procedure, least of all to the school.” Statinistor starts, "Aleena tells me Kindoras Keep is thriving no thanks to your lashing tongue against the pyromancers who fled in fear when a frost worm attacked."

“I am not sorry for getting them motivated.  They were shirking their responsibility.  We easily could have been destroyed had they not got up to their post.” Menthos responds

"Kador tells me before the next full moon you shall have a revelation that will make your fire more pure. I am happy you have returned so that I may be able to be there when you receive this blessing." Statinistor comments, “also a Babau clutch and an Osiluth commander arrived in Highcastle yesterday looking for a party matching some of the people you are know to carouse with. They left about an hour after arriving, apparently satisfied that whatever they were looking for was no longer here. You wouldn't know anything about this would you?” Statinistor inquired

“No, I took out an interest free loan.” Menthos deflects the question.

Menthos takes a deep breath, walks into the flames and is transported back to the scrying room in Statinistor’s quarters.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Fireworks*

Kalen’s servant returns with a thick dusty tome. He hands the books off and teleports out again. Kalen inspects the cover and deeming it correct, tosses the heavy tome onto the table in front of Haimish. The book scatters several plates and glasses off the table to shatter on the floor below.

“Your answer.” Kalen says

“This whole thing? Why don’t you sum it up for me?” Haimish replies

“Because the answer lies within and I do not have the kind of time it would take to find you the specific page you require. Your request was to find you a solution, not to impregnate it into your memory.” Kalen responds

“You’re awfully touchy for a twice dead guy.” Haimish replies

“The answer does not reside within that tome; Kalen knows very well where the answer lies. Through me!” Ina-Herit shouts

The drow returns with a scroll case of made from spider silk, “Your stipulation, and here is my offer.” The drow pulls out a leathery piece of spider hide inscribed with arcane runes.

“Deceiver! Your liege isn’t even powerful enough to send you the answer communally.” Lord Ina-Herit accuses

“Your god with be the first to secrete the nourishment for our cavalry.” The drow returns fire

“Which will ride out to terrorize shrieker colonies everywhere. Better lock up your fungus, Lolth is coming.” Lord Ina-Herit retorts

“You mock the greater being dead one, I shall not forget this slight. Your eternal agony shall become my life’s goal.” The drow answers

“Really? I’m disappointed. You have a brother or a father that can take your place? I don’t feel all that threatened by a female drow.” Lord Ina-Herit insults 

The drow draws her hand crossbows and speaks a few arcane words in dark elven. The wizard eyes sunk low and cast a pale green light on the drow paralyzing her. She then disappears along with six wizard eyes. A few more pop in and surround Lord Ina-Herit.

“What? I did nothing; it is not the fault of one if another can not take the truth. Perhaps you would do better off not allowing any Lolth representatives on this island?” Lord Ina-Herit seems to speak to one of the eyes.

“I believe, I am the only suitor left?” Kalen says 

“Fine.” Lord Ina-Herit groans. The mummy reaches into his wrapped torso and pulls out a bone scroll case, “Within is a map to your destination and my offer for the blood.” Lord Ina-Herit says while looking back at Kalen, “and if I were you, I’d avoid giving that one anything.”

“May I have the rock?” Kalen requests

“Wait, wasn’t there a couple more bidders?” Haimish questions

“Yes.” The Rakshasa, here is your requested information, and here is my bid.” The Rakshasa states while handing Haimish a small note and dropping three thick tomes on the table.

“Don’t forget about me.” The erinyes says, teleporting in on top of the table in front of Haimish naked from the waist up, “Oops” *giggle* “Wardrobe malfunction.” The devil takes a paint brush from her hair and begins tracing words across her chest.

“Do you have the answer or where you looking to turn a trick?” Haimish inquires

“I’m writing your answer out so I don’t forget it.” The erinyes answers still drawing across her breasts

“How am I going to review it if I can’t see it?” Haimish asks

“Give me access to your quarters and you can look it over anytime you want.” The erinyes answers

“What’s your offer going to be then?” Haimish wondered

“Oh? I’m sure I stuck an offer here somewhere, maybe you could help me find it? Please?” The erinyes pleads seductively.

“I’m going to need to think this over.” Haimish hurriedly answered and scooped up all the pertinent information before teleporting back to his shared room.

Menthos emerges deep in the center of the Kadorian temple; he instantly could feel he was in a much hotter environment than Kindoras Keep.

“Much better, too cold up north.” Menthos relates

“Welcome back, I am glad the temple of fire warms your heart so.” Helle states

“Jack-ass. Do you have any research resources on sight? I need to know what they took from Hledra that’s got the nine hells all menstrual over it.” Menthos asks

“We have an envious collection of material on the usefulness of collected material in determining the responses to questions rhetorically asked.” Helle answered

“Excellent, take me there at once.” Menthos demands

“You’ll have to wait until morning, Statinistor is debriefing a special guest there.” Helle responds

“Really? Who’s the lucky lady?” Menthos wiggles his eyebrows

“You’ll find out tomorrow.” Helle answers

“Do you know where Doopa’s hanging out at?” Menthos asks

“He entered himself, along with two strangers, in the games yesterday. I believe they finished third, much of that due to Doopa’s insistence that brawn trumps brain.” Helle answers

“Where is he now?” Menthos inquires

“Drowning his winnings in dwarven ale at the Laughing Unicorn just off Market Street.” Helle replies

Menthos bids his farewell to Helle, telling him he’ll be back later that evening and will try to speak with Statinistor then. He heads off to the Laughing Unicorn to talk with Doopa about the rest of the party’s escape from Hledra.

The bar is brightly colored and stood out like a succubus at a paladin’s retirement party. Pinks, yellows, purples and colors Menthos didn’t even want to guess their names decorated the outside; streamers, bows, white horses with horns strapped to their heads roamed freely through the tavern each carrying a load of drinks on it’s back. 

Surprisingly to Menthos Doopa did not stand out so easily, there were a few ogres, trolls, and orcs in the bar likely there to offset the pompousness of the elves and Halflings which dominated the patron’s numbers. It was Doopa that found Menthos.

“Mentos! Where you go? Doopa mist you!” The ogre cries out and gives the teifling a bear hug

“Ack. Put me down.” Menthos gets out as Doopa drops him the three feet to the floor

“Doopa win toe-free . See?” Doopa holds up a good sized cup with “3rd place” emblazoned on the side. The ogre had drunk so much from it in two days that the gold paint they used on the outside was already worn off on the cup’s handles and blackish stains discolored the gold paint on the inside of the cup.

“What happened to you guys after I left?” Menthos asked

“You left? Xanax say you dead. Is Minty dead? You no look dead.” Doopa states

“Is there some problem here?” A waiter interjected himself in the conversation

“Yes, you’re the problem. Butt out.” Menthos addresses the man 

“Sir, if you’re not drinking then you’re going to have to leave.” The waiter states

“I think if you checked your tabs you’d realize my buddy here is doing enough drinking for the both of us.” Menthos replies

The waiter motions for a bouncer and a large troll wearing a unicorn skull walks up and shoves Menthos on the back, “You come with me.”

“Hey no don’t shove Minty like dat, I’ll fit ya right here.” Doopa says and drops his cup and begins searching for his club.

“Swamp thing, take your hands off me before I char you so bad your grandfather will cook in his grave.” Menthos says showing him the Kador holy symbol.

“Is that supposed to impress me?” The troll replies

“No, if I wanted to impress you, I’d drop my pants.” Menthos answers

The troll heaves Menthos off the floor as Doopa punches the bouncer in the face causing him to drop Menthos behind him onto a table full of drinking orcs who immediately stagger to their feet.

“You make me spill. I cut you!” The orcs draw their blades as the troll turns to try and separate this new fight breaking out 

Doopa twists and falls on his rear to the floor, he gets helped up by a human and drow, the former hands Doopa his club back.

Menthos rolls off the table and knocks an orc over as the surrounding tables begin to empty and scatter. Two ogre bouncers are called over to assist the troll as Doopa takes a swing and connects with the back of the troll. The troll responds by grabbing the heads of two of the inebriated orcs and shoving them into Doopa. The human grabs the orc of the left’s arm and shoves a greatsword through clavicle via the orc’s armpit. 

The drow retreats enough to give himself clearance as his fires off his hand crossbow into the wall opposite the orcs. 

“Fascist wall!” The drow shouts

Menthos gets to his feet and heads for the exit when the waiter throws a forearm around Menthos’ neck and begins to squeeze, “Where do you think you’re going teifling?”

“I’m gonna burn this place down.” Menthos responds while fingering through his pockets looking for an opal to drop. 

The troll latches onto Doopa’s chest and rends his claws sideways, Doopa lets out a drunken snarl and pokes the troll’s eyes. The troll stumbles backwards and crashes through the orc’s table. Meanwhile a few Halflings from the other side of the tavern begin indiscriminately launching sling bullets into the melee fray. 

The noise inside attracts a dwarven posse on the outside who stick their heads in, see orcs with weapons drawn and immediately charge. The human spins around Doopa and slices open the other orc that was tossed by the troll. The drow backs up some more and fires a hand crossbow from his other hand, this one sails true and strikes an orc through the eye socket, however it was the dead orc. 

“Failure only proves my superiority!” The drow screams as his arbitrarily kicks over a halfling who was staring at the fight. 

“Here, hold this for me.” Menthos says as he hands over a fire opal to the waiter.

“I don’t want your bribe demon-man!” The waiter screams and throws the fire opal towards the bar.

The resulting explosion threw Menthos and the waiter through the entrance door and across the street.

“You killed them all?” The stunned waiter exclaimed

“Me? You’re the one who threw the bomb.” Menthos answered, stood, and dusted himself off as Doopa wondered out of the tavern carrying the human and drow with him.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hah!! I don't which I liked more, Haimish's negotiations or the bar fight!

Very cool stuff!


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Haimish surveyed the unrolled parchment papers and dusty tomes that had been delivered to him in a bid to win the blood of some ancient creature that a variety of evil creatures wanted at all cost. 

“Ho! Abyssal I see, are you consorting with devils Haimish? The mountains will be very displeased with this news.” Kourk rants

“No, I’m trying to kill two birds with one stone.” Haimish answers

“What’s that you say, why would the killing of two birds with only one rock be a desirable solution when you are finished reading those vile words? Have you turned to a life of abject violence? I could perhaps lecture you on the virtues of diplomacy or perhaps you are ready to begin a lesson into sainthood?” Kourk offers

“What are you blathering about? I’m trying to solve the riddle of an ice gate that’s so far proven to be troublesome. Your silence in this matter would be greatly appreciated.” Haimish replies

Before Kourk can respond, Adokul materializes in the room.

“Adokul, have your travels led you to the same dark decrepit place as our bardic friend there? Have you too sampled the despicable nectar from the flower of malevolence?” Kourk asks

“What did you tell him!” Adokul demands from Haimish

“I told him to leave me alone.” Haimish answers

“Yes, I see it in your eyes and across your cheeks now. Very telling, what kind of debauchery exists beyond those walls? What level of immorality am I being kept against my will from cleansing?” Kourk shouts

“I’m going to wash up.” Adokul states 

“Better check yourself, I’d take Kourk along if I was you. Pixie dust can be a very bad irritant.” Haimish alerts the mage

“Pixie dust? What manner of creature assailed you?” Kourk questions 

“I was not attacked, I was interrupted in a very important business deal. Thanks to your bardic friend over there I had to renegotiate and valuable time was lost and could not be made up.” Adokul states

“Perhaps a discussion with me might ease the worries of your business partner? I will swear upon your good faith and will tirelessly endeavor to ensure that your rightful property is returned to you.” Kourk says

Haimish just sits and laughs and laughs, Adokul’s face turns redder and redder, “I do not need you help!” Adokul shouts and slams the privy door.

Haimish stares at the parchments and makes his selection, he opens the room’s exit door and asks that one of the guards outside how to alert someone they wish to speak with them. Haimish is given instructions and teleports away amid the constant pounding on the privy door by Kourk asking Adokul if he needs absolution.

Haimish appears in a lavishly decorated room, Haimish could sense wealth in the very air around him. Incense and candles of all shapes and scents burned in the room, creating a hodgepodge of smoke and dim lighting in the circular room.

“Am I to understand that your presence here means that you have taken my offer and are here to deliver the rock to me?” The Rakshasa asks

“Yes, do you have the payment?” Haimish asks

“Yes I do.” The Rakshasa answers and turns to face a tapestry on the wall behind him. It depicted a huge library run by the cat-like race the Rakshasa belonged to, the cat reached into the tapestry itself and pulled free three books, “here is your payment.”

Haimish salivated over the books in hopes the Rakshasa was being truthful with him and not trying deceive, then he remembered what the Rakshasas are notorious for.

“Good, you’ll have no problem opening those for me to make sure we’re both dealing on good faith here?” Haimish asks

“Sure.” The Rakshasa opened the books one by one and flipped through the pages, satisfied that he was not getting an obvious trap, Haimish parted way with his ice rock and collected the tomes.

“Thank you little one, this item shall prove very useful to us.” The Rakshasa excitedly stated and then he teleported out. 

Haimish returned to the room as Xanthos and Eeyore were being returned, Eeyore was up and moving around in skin that looked like it had been badly burned. Xanthos was still unconscious and laid out on the bed. 

“He must not engage in strenuous activity for at least three days hence.” The Sithilar stated towards Xanthos, “He is fine to go.” The creature said as it pointed to Eeyore.

“Eeyore! What glorious news do you bring from the verge of death, was paradise everything a non-humanoid would wish it to be?” Kourk asked

“I don’t remember anything.” Eeyore answers

“Oh, pity. Well I am versed in any number of funeral and interment rites, if you feel the pull of your non-human deity and you wish to leave us behind, please feel free and know that your body will receive the highest in quality services.” Kourk advises

“You there halt!” A constable shouts at the Laughing Unicorn’s waiter

Menthos grabs a hold of the man’s collar and yanks him back down onto his rear, “I’ve got him officer!”

The police arrive on the scene as well as the volunteer fire department they take both Menthos and the waiter into custody.  The waiter blubbers about begging for forgiveness as Menthos watches Doopa and his two suitcases of flesh stroll out of the burning edifice. 

“What went on here!” The constable demands

“He threw a fireball into the bar, I tried to stop him but his snake-like mentality was able to grant him freedom, I only wish I could have acted sooner and spared the lives of those people. Their families will never be able to share joy with their loved ones ever again. 

A few more minutes of questioning and the waiter begging forgiveness convinced them to let the tiefling go and take the waiter to the gallows. The building was slowly turning from a giant bonfire down to a mere smolder. Menthos motioned for Doopa to follow him back to the Kador temple. Once they had reached their destination they were met by Helle in the foyer.

“Where were you guys! I sent up the signal could you not see it from here?” Menthos advises

“As has been explained to you, travel beyond our walls is a dangerous proposition.” Helle states

“Could have been me going to the gallows, if not for my quick tongue and dashingly good looks.” Menthos answers

“Yeah, your quick tongue got you thrown out of the place.” The greatsword wielding human states

“I see you’ve yet again managed new friends despite your whip-like idioms.” Helle states, “Welcome to the temple of the fire cleanser, the flame of rebirth, and the passion within.”

“I am Dahlgren, seeker of truths hidden. This is my traveling companion Aust, we’ve just come from the steppes of the barbarians after unearthing some things to further my cause.” Dahlgren states

“I Doopa. Doopa winner of biggest ale cup ever!” Doopa shouts triumphantly while holding his worn trophy high in the air. 

Aust wanders over to a brazier burning brightly in the hallway, “So we meet again brazier, it is with disdain that I fondly remember our last encounter. You will not abscond me of my flesh this time for I am prepared for you wily ways. My eyes move at the speed of sight and they are ever vigilant. Rest here well knowing that in the morning I come to destroy you.”

“He seems to be not so well.” Helle advises

“I’m not worried, the only thing he hit the entire brawl at the bar was a dead orc, and if that’s his level of expertise then I’ve got nothing to fear.” Menthos replied

 “Do not let his eccentric behavior fool you; he is an expert assassin and shadower. He once trailed a modron across Mechanus without being detected even by the plane itself.” Dahlgren relates

“Why would he do that? Did he kill it?” Menthos asks

“Life is not the only thing he assassinates.” Dahlgren warns

“I’m sure he kills the room at comedy clubs all through the underdark as well.” Menthos answers

Aust walks up to Menthos, “You smell of impregnable collapse, I shall seek what it is that ails your heart so. Perhaps through understand of your mystifying perplexity you can reach enlightenment with the dim light that shines over your dazzling brazier of fire. One should be so lucky.” 

“Do you mock me so with your appendage heaving verbiage?” Menthos answers 

“I discovered that crutch support is far more needful than factual basis.” Aust replies

“Stop it, my head spins. Statinistor will see you now Menthos.” Helle advises

Menthos follows the pyromancer up to the roof of the building. The dome has been transformed into some kind of wicked aerie.

“Menthos, good to see you again. I hope all is well with you.” Statinistor asks

“So far.” Menthos answers

“Tonight, you have the privilege of creating the first wave of a new breed of pyromancers, one that has no limitations of spells or rest, one that can adapt to any situation. Beyond fire, beyond heat, there rests the ember. The potential for so much more, the start of everything there will be.” Statinistor says

“I don’t get it?” Menthos answers

“You will, in time. Our conditions here are far more favorable that your previous, unbeknownst to you, try. I will retrieve you when Kador renews.” Statinistor says and disappears along with the only exit door. 

In front of Menthos spans a large gap over the central hall of the temple, a slim walkway circumnavigates the dome. A large rushing sound erupts from below and a huge fire explodes up past the walkway some twenty feet, almost touching the ceiling. Then the unmistakable sound of large wings flapping could be heard of the roaring fire, whatever was coming, was coming fast.

“When Minty get back?” Doopa asked

“When he's done or dead. Its up to him.” Helle answered

“Not high on ambiguity here are you?” Dahlgren asked

“I smell a bad moon rising, I hear black approaching, I can see the sounds of many warriors cut down, yet no one asks why I weep.” Aust interjects


----------



## Jon Potter

Yeesh! And I thought Menthos' grandious dialog was rough!

What the heck is Aust's deal? Sybil? Former Alienist?


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Yeesh! And I thought Menthos' grandious dialog was rough!
> 
> What the heck is Aust's deal? Sybil? Former Alienist?




Ha! you should hear them at the table. Don't worry though there are no more exchanges like this one between these two again. Menthos gets a purpose in life and Aust gets _something else_ a gift from Menthos.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*A quickie*

A hard knock on the door interrupted the team from their final departure preparations; Kourk opened the door and greeted the pallid man who stood in the doorway.

“I come with an important message for Haimish Letram.” The man states

Kourk snatches it from the man’s hand, “We do not wish to join your foul ranks, tell your master he can sit an eternity without due response. We offer him no respite for this query.” 

“Gimme that.” Haimish states, ripping the paper from Kourk’s hand. 

_Touché bard
You mock me even at your own peril
Meet me along the southern pier in one hour
I have something for you._

Haimish crumples the paper in his hand and tosses it into the fireplace and watches it burn.

“Ha! See putrid one, we shall not be dissuaded by your rotten master be gone from this abode and tell your master ramifications are coming.” Kourk says and shoves the man back into the hallway, “well played bard, if he could cry we would have seen a tear down the side of his face when the paper ignited.”

“Since when did you get overly dramatic?” Adokul asks

“Your concern is misplaced; it should be in our convalescing comrades here.” Kourk replies

 “Whatever, lets just get out of here. This place offers no chance at increasing my power.” Adokul complains

“Then you didn’t look very hard.” Haimish answers

Haimish helps the team pack up and get to the arrival circle, once there he tells them he must see an old friend before departing, and teleports away.

“I didn’t think you’d come, your mortal heart impresses me once again.” Kalen says

“Cut the blathering Kalen, what do you want?” Haimish demands

“Oh, a little ego I see. Got yourself a backbone after all.” Kalen answers

“No, I just don’t fear you. You’re easily beaten.” Haimish counters

“Really, have you not noticed the sun glaring overhead and yet here I stand plan as day uninhibited?” Kalen replies

“No, but I’ve also noticed we’re no longer on the prime, so that’s likely not the sun at all.” Haimish answers

“Astute you are pity you couldn’t apply that to your selling of the blood ice.” Kalen states

“Bitter feelings for you are of no concern of mine; go commiserate with your lifeless pals.” Haimish shoots back. 

“Tell me my talkative friend, have you ever heard of a rakshasa lich?” Kalen asks

Haimish pauses and thinks about it for a moment, “No, can’t say that I have why?” 

“You will. Although I am glad you didn’t give it to dusty rags as that would’ve made your trek through his domain that much harder.” Kalen answers cryptically

“Your innuendos tire me, get to the point or I’m out of here.” Haimish responds

“I merely wished to thank you.” Kalen answers

“Odd way of doing it.” Haimish replies

“This new.” Kalen paused to think over the next word, “existence you’ve given me. It has allowed me to see things I haven’t seen in thousands of years. The sunrise, stained glass, green grass and blue sky.” 

“I didn’t do that for you, I was duped and you’ll not find me so easy a target this time.” Haimish retorts

“Settle down, I know you chose the cat’s offer over mine to spite me. I offered you the answer you sought and yet you threw it away without consideration.” Kalen advises

“No the rakshasa’s offer was far superior to yours.” Haimish answers

“Oh you think that now, wait until you’re knee deep in it and you’re searching for a why, you’ll hear my voice echoing back at you a soft I told you so. I go now to prepare for what is to come you’re free to go, we will not meet again.” Kalen declares and teleports away

Haimish returns to the impatient team and with the School of Arcane Knowledge representative they teleport back to Highcastle.

The creature slowly descended from the roof of the dome, circling lazily as it watched Menthos below it. The teifling thought it some deformed butterfly, black bat-like wings flapped above a thin pink line. As the creature got closer, Menthos was able to discern the pink line was human-like in form and two arms and legs presented themselves as well. The creature dipped low as it rounded the far side of the dome and when it swung back around to face Menthos it was nearly at his eye level. It was then he confirmed his suspicions of an erinyes.

“Hello lady.” Menthos greeted the devilish seducer

“I am Malicya, I was told your hand was in my creation.” The creature states

“And fine work I must say.” Menthos answers

“I ache for the flesh of mortals, I have been charged with delivering a being that will allow for my lord’s return to the prime. You are to give me that heir.” Malicya commands

“I don’t have time to do your errands for you; you can fly and use tantalizingly delicious means to further your end.” Menthos answers

“You do not follow half-breed, commence with delivering your seed!” the erinyes shouts

“Well, why didn’t you just come out and say so. I’m always willing to help a lady in need, point me to the bed and I’ll get to..” Menthos is yanked off the platform and lifted into the air

“No beds, this will be done airborne.” Malicya states

“Kinky, I like it, but I like a little more evenness you’re getting what you want. I’m going to need to get something from this as well.” Menthos counters

“Your gift is in knowing of the creation of the vessel, I will permit you to view the birthing.” The erinyes offers

“Yuck, why would I want that? I was thinking more along the lines of information. You’re in the know in low places right? Plus you already said my skills aided your metamorphosis I think you owe me.” Menthos counters

The erinyes flies silently for a few moments before responding, “Fine, produce the conception of the vessel and I shall answer one question.” The erinyes replies

“Two questions.” Menthos counters

“Fine.” Malicya concedes


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*The best of plans are laid*

“How do I find Thruvimhurax the Cunning?” Menthos asks

“He resides in a living mountain of ice in the heart of the Majestics it slowly traverse all of his land, if you’re going there a show of force to his brood will likely save you from being eaten before you ever reach the White Dragon himself.” The erinyes answers

“How does an erinyes gain free will?” Menthos inquired

The erinyes pauses in midflight and the pair begin sinking in the thick air, a confused quizzical look washes over the devil’s face as their decent picks up speed, “I do not know, I do not have free will to decide.”

“Then by omission you’ve voided the bargain. You cannot be the chosen receptacle.” Menthos replies

“I was ordered to complete this and I an honored to complete this. Failure is not an option; I will tear the seed from your own body if necessary.” The erinyes spits back

“No I’d wager you’d need a living donor, having me dead isn’t going to get you anywhere. I do have a compromise for you.” Menthos responds

“No more bargaining, I demand payment.” The erinyes counters

“You broke the deal by failing to answer the question, I offer you a way to complete your mission and still have face.” Menthos offers

“What is your price mortal?” The devil inquires

“Your name, your true name,” Menthos answers

“I shall not be beholden to you.” The erinyes replies

“The day grows long, soon the sun will set and you will return empty handed to your master, what will be your explanation then?” Menthos observes

The erinyes lands on the small walkway near where Menthos arrived and watches the golden hue of the sun creep ever further down the temple’s domed top. “My name is not a gift I can grant; I have not been given permission to renegotiate any deals.” 

 “But you see, by giving me your name freely, you will learn something of free will and are you not the brokers of knowledge for your master? What better way to explain free will, than to experience it first hand?” Menthos states

Morning finds Haimish introducing Xanthos, Eeyore, Kourk and Adokul to Dahlgrin and Aust. With pleasantries exchanged the party relays their findings on the island of Croy and within the city of Highcastle. Haimish mentions nothing of Kalen to the party, instead playing off his secret meetings as just how the island does business with a wink to Adokul who also neglects to mention his forays on the island. 

“Dahlgrin, what is it you do for a living?” Xanthos asks

“When you walk into a room, you notice the people there, maybe you see familiar faces? You smell the wine and food being served, you hear the conversations swirling around you, and maybe some music plays in the corner? When I walk into a room I see the possibilities and patterns of arraignment all around me, I see communications on a subconscious level and I see their eventual pattern conclusion. I search constantly for those patterns hoping to glimpse a reality that once was.” Dahlgrin answers

“That’s not an answer at all, sounds more like a con man than anything a moral conviction would allude to.” Xanthos responds

“Morality is a fairytale told to children to keep them in line; it has no practical use to me. The powers I come in contact with merely wish to experience the joy of existence again. I am happy to oblige them.” Dahlgrin answered

“Your tone belies your inability to successfully debate someone with practice in the common tongue. Perhaps you should take up another language and practice that one until you master that?” Aust interjects himself into the conversation.

“And you would be the unskilled labor?” Xanthos inquires

“Yes, the mere presence of my body proves drow superiority. For without body there can be no killing.” Aust answers

“Your circular speak is quite impressive, too bad you simply spin your wheel and kick up dirt, failing to get anywhere with that mouth of yours. I almost miss Menthos.” Xanthos replies

“Doopa see Minty today!” The ogre relates. Dahlgrin and Aust smile at each other knowingly at the revelation that this elf has other detractors. 

“I’m sure you did Doopa, probably a little too much of that turpentine you’re drinking.” Xanthos counters

“Your ogre friend did indeed see this Menthos person, teifling right? Today, at a local bar, we chatted by the fire.” Dahlgrin replies

“Menthos lives? The man is like a cockroach and not in a good way.” Xanthos responds

“Well, I’m not staying around while you guys reminisce, I’ve got important business to take care of, and anyone wanting some real work with actual gold can come with me. I’ll need some trustworthy individuals to assist me.” Adokul speaks up

“I have no need for coinage. I seek a deeper spiritual relationship with my mountain brothers the Stonebreaker Clan.” Kourk relates

“But you’re human?” Dahlgrin observes

“I see no reason to label people with your archaic prejudices once you have moved past perception you will find there is only law and order and that is what the universe turns on.” Kourk replies

“Well, I agree with you on that part, I’m just not willing to travel down your stream of consciousness without my paddle.” Dahlgrin answers

“Friends, countrymen and emotional baggage!” Menthos shouts as he greets the gathered heroes, “How I’ve missed a couple of, well maybe one or two of you. I guess more like one of you.” 

“It lives.” Xanthos said turning his head away from the warlock

“Oh, don’t be shy Xanthos come give me one of those deep kisses with a rear goose you do so well.” Menthos said

“I will most certainly not give you anything, what happened to you after you deserted us in Hledra?” Xanthos demands

“I was whisked away on a fabulous three hour tour of my own personal hell, replete with gnomes and ettin conversationalists.” Menthos answers

“I’ve got my foot out the door people, is anyone with me on the gold train out of here?” Adokul interjects

“What Minty going to do?” Doopa inquires

“I’m going to go chat with a white dragon about some prime real estate I’m looking to buy.” Menthos answers

“I think you should see this first.” Haimish says and pulls out the parchment the rakshasa gave him, “It contains the answer to our ice gate riddle.” 

 “Excellent, but I still have to go. I promised someone, and I need to follow through.” Menthos answers

“Doopa go where dragon is” Doopa says siding with Menthos

“Well, since I have the answer I will see if this dragon corroborates the rakshasa’s information.” Haimish answers

“I’ll go, just to see you get swallowed whole by a dragon.” Xanthos states

Eeyore, Aust, Kourk and Dahlgrin also elect to travel back to the north. Dejected Adokul mouths off at the party and vows the next time they meet it will be him buying their services.  

The party heads out after breakfast in search of an ancient dragon.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Divergent futures*

The journey north this time had been easy enough, no harassing dangers chased them and no blizzard slowed their progress. The party arrived in the Majestics only four days out from Highcastle and while the weather showed signs of the bleak winter ahead, the skies withheld their frozen treasure as the party penetrated the high central peaks of the mountains. The cutting slopes of the Majestics caused the wind speeds to accelerate to gale force in the valleys between the peaks, thusly the party attempted to remain on the sides on the peaks and not tread through the valleys. 

Xanthos transformed into an eagle and set out to locate the moving mountain, he spotted the mobile home after only a half hour of searching, easily picking it out against a backdrop of other mountains as it was the only peak moving. The druid began to dive in for a closer look when his mind reminded him of what his eyes bore him, a dozen young wyrmlings soared around the mountain and he broke off his examination and headed back to the party.
The snow started falling heavily as the party trekked towards Thruvimhurax’s domain, it seemed as if the white dragon was toying with the party; once they got accustomed to the wind and snow buffeting them from one direction, it would shift and blow from another, a few times knocking over the drow as his body was inexperienced against this force of nature.

“This totally sucks, what human god sat on his gilded throne and thought, hmm cold and windy? I like it!” Aust spat

“Not any god I’d worship, it was probably some bored druid who was done stripping the bark off a dogwood tree to silence it.” Menthos answered

“Your asinine comments are not warranted, if you’re going to spout out the first thing that pops into your head please do it in a language no one here speaks.” Xanthos replied

“How human like winter wonderland?” Doopa asked of Dahlgrin

“I’m fine, as I am not human.” Dahlgrin answered

“Doopa not human also, Doopa is strongest ogre Doopa know.” Doopa boasts

Kourk walked in stupefaction, marveling at the size of the mountains surrounding them, “It is no wonder why my people live among such things of strength and beauty.” 

“Huh? Moron, you’re human, quit with the annoying dwarf acting, you’re bad at it and you look like you’ve never stepped foot in a mine let along the underdark, and take that ridiculous helmet off.” Aust mocks

“What surely you jest darkling, I feel the sun’s rays constantly upon my brow.” Kourk answers

“Great, our cleric’s caught the crazies, can you do anything to help him Xanthos?” Eeyore whispered to the shifter

“Reincarnation, best to start over again; I believe he’s exhausted the mileage on that model.” Xanthos replies

The party emerged from the final slope before the valley of Thurvimhurax came into view. Dark shapes sailed across the sky above their heads just high enough to be blurred by the heavy snow, but low enough to cause trepidation within the party.

“The dragon’s offspring no doubt, probably deciding if we’re worth the trouble trying to eat outright.” Eeyore claimed

In the distance, rhythmic thundering could be heard and felt as the snow beneath them shook when the sound waves washed over the party. Pressing on, the party got closer and closer to the thundering as the skies slowed their assault on the party. Soon it became apparent what the sound was, as the Cunning Dragon’s abode strode into view. The mountain was no fixed structure, it walked on two legs possessed two arms and its peak was shaped as a humanoid’s head. The whole mountain was alive.

Xanthos whistled in astonishment as Aust strained his eyes to look up into the blinding sky at the walking edifice. Menthos quickly retrieved his Kador symbol from within his robes as displayed it upon his ten foot pole.

“What do you seek fire one?” a hissing voice spoke from within the storm

“I seek Thurvimhurax the Cunning; I have payment for services to be rendered from Statinistor High Priest of Kador.” Menthos spoke

“You may ascend.” A booming voiced echoed from above

Menthos moved up to a stationary foot and began to spider climb up the icy mountain.

“Chasten dragon! Fear keeps you from delivering us to your presence; I show my superiority by waiting here for your arrival at my feet!” Aust shouts

A solitary dragon dives in low and scoops up the assassin and carries him up the side of the mountain.

“This is more like dragon; your hospitality shall not go unheralded.” Aust claims

The dragon reaches the outstretched palm up hand of the mountain and deposits Aust there.

“Hey! What manner of humor is this? Your joke is weak for I fail to laugh.” Aust complains, the mountain’s arm brings its hand within fifty feet of its cave like mouth opening and Aust feels a great inrush of air as if the mountain itself was taking in a deep breath, then a pause of silence and stillness.

“Ah crap.” Aust mutters as the mountain blows a hurricane force wind out from its mouth, blowing Aust off its hand and sends him hurtling across the small valley on a collision course with an opposite peak.

Xanthos quickly alights as a giant eagle and torpedoes up and grasps the flailing drow before he could be splattered across the landscape. Haimish joins Menthos in spider climbing up the mountain, Doopa however uses his bare hands to lift himself up the mountain. Kourk and Dahlgrin wait on the ground along with Xanthos and Aust. Eeyore shifts into aranea spider form and climbs alongside Doopa up the mountain.

The four reach the cave mouth four hours after their ascent started, all of them out of breath and aching all over. The cave mouth had a breeze that seemed more like breathing than a natural occurrence as the wind would blow in from the outside and then pause only to reverse and blow out from within and then repeat. 

The journey to Thurvimhurax’s throne room was a quick one, The dragon surrounded itself with mounds of platinum and silver all buffed to a shiny brilliance that blinded those coming in.

“You have wasted too much of my time, already the mountains grow thin of ox due to mortal meddling. I no longer wish to speak to you. Begone from my sight or face the wrath of my children.” The great white wrym stated

Thurvimhurax’s wyrmlings and half-breeds straightened their backs at the promise of easy food.

“Great Wyrm of the Cold Hearth would the sacrifice of one or two of your children be worth more than the payment I bare to you?” Menthos asked

Haimish kicked the back of Menthos’ leg, “what the hell are you doing? You don’t intimidate a great wrym.” Haimish whispered through clenched teeth.

“You would dare to injure my sired?” The dragon moved its body so as to spread its wings across the cavern

“I would dare to protect myself; I have to doubts as to the outcome of the fight, but which of your children die so that the others may feast?” Menthos’ words stirred amongst the dragon’s brood as each one took their eyes off their prey and focused instead on their brethren trying to ascertain which one of them would be the one to stab them in the back. 

“Little one you amuse me with your sowing of discord among my faithful, it appears I will be needing to thin the flock a little.” With those words the dragon recaptured the attention of his children

Menthos shoved both hands in his pockets and he fingered a small warm opal in each one, waiting for the first move to blow the top off of this mountain.

“Still I made a bargain; therefore I will let you have what I have sold. Leave the payment here, my children will escort you to the holding place where I keep the object out of reach. It is there for your taking along with its warning, go now before I grow too hungry to stand your sight any longer.” Thurvimhurax commands

Menthos, Haimish, Doopa and Eeyore are flown through a small cave at the back of the mountain’s left knee. They are told directions to the hiding place they seek and then left to their own devices. 

“I wonder why the dragon thinks this is a safe enough place for whatever object you’re retrieving if any of his children can just walk in here and take it, if my father feared something that much and I was a morally corrupt individual like a young white dragon that’s the first thing I would go after.” Haimish wondered aloud

His answer was no long in the coming as the first of dozens of desiccated and frozen white dragon corpses to litter the rest of the path were encountered.

“If it kills like this, why would we want it too?” Eeyore asks

The corridor finally opens up into a small cave, placed upon a pedestal of ivory sits a black orb just smaller than a human’s head in size; it gives off a sickly green light that dimly illuminates the room.

“Haimish, can you discern the writing on the wall behind the object?” Menthos asks pointing to an inscription 

Haimish casts a spell of understanding and the magic of the inscription leaps into the bard’s mind, there seemed to be two inscriptions one almost prophetic and the other a reply.

_How keen the unrevealed hunter’s eye prevails upon the land
To seek the unsuspecting and the weak;
And powerless the fabled sat, too smug to lift a hand
Toward the foe the threatened from within.
Who cares to dry the cheeks of those who saddened stand?
Adrift upon a sea of futile speech?
And to fall to fate and make the status quo
But no one there had heaven within their reach._

_Where was your word, where did you go?
Where was your helping, where was your bow?
Dull is the armour, cold is the day.
Hard was the journey, dark was the way.
I heard the word; I couldn’t stay.
I couldn’t stand it another day._

“What does it mean?” Eeyore said

“I don’t know, there’s more writing on the orb itself though.” Haimish explained

_Touched by the timely coming,
Roused from the keeper’s sleep,
Release the grip, fall from the keep

Held now with the knowing,
Rest now within the peace.
Take of the fruit, but guard the seed._

“Maybe Xanadu know what it is?” Doopa offered

“I think you should carry it Haimish.” Menthos surprised the gathered

“Why me, it’s your reward.” Haimish dismissed

“You’ll take care of it better than I can.” Menthos answered 

It seemed to Haimish that Menthos was withholding more than he was letting on, although this rare show of concern and responsibility enabled Haimish to brush aside those feelings and grasp the orb.

A small frown appeared on the side of Menthos’ mouth, the erinyes’ words were starting to come true and he felt sorry for what he had offered the bard.


----------



## Jon Potter

Hairy Minotaur said:
			
		

> A small frown appeared on the side of Menthos’ mouth, the erinyes’ words were starting to come true and he felt sorry for what he had offered the bard.




Hmm... Very interesting...

I can't wait to find out what the erinyes said to Menthos. And what that orb is.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Your Meta-plot is showing*

“It’s so cold, like it’s draining the warmth right out of my hand.” Haimish observes

“Are you picking anything else up? Like how it killed all those dragons?” Eeyore asked

Menthos turned and looked Haimish in the face, he saw the pale complexion of the bard and marveled at the speed at which the artifact worked. Menthos wondered how Haimish was going to last the night let alone seven days. Haimish concentrated on the object, trying to pierce its veil of secrecy; the identify spell worming its way through the orb’s history. As the first layers were peeled off, Haimish felt the maddening cage that is isolation. The orb had been unbothered for so long it wondered if would never again feel the power of an army at its feet.

Empathy settled over Haimish’s face as he commiserated with the orb on its feelings of loneliness, understanding welled up in Haimish’s eyes as if the orb were a long lost friend who was dying. That peaceful look was purged as the orb showed the bard the last time it felt useful, the last time it was held by someone worthy, the last time it was raised above the form of a wraith as an army of dead shambled forth from the shadowed form and the dark orb.

Haimish’s face contorts in horror as the orb painstakingly relinquishes each detailed memory one by one. The faces of thousands of souls roll by the bard’s mind’s eye in an anguishing procession of victims; their bodies cracked off like a shell and the soul re-appropriated to an existence in limbo. 

“This thing is pure evil!” Haimish exclaimed while trying to set the orb back into its placeholder, the mocking cackle from the orb told Haimish getting rid of the orb would prove far more difficult that merely putting it down.

“Why would we need to come all this way for that?” Eeyore questioned 

“It was the only way to ensure victory.” Menthos says somberly

“What are you talking about?” Eeyore asks

“Oh no, it’s going to…” Menthos clasped his hand over the bard’s mouth, and leaned in close to his ear.

“Don’t, it’ll only make them panic. We have to get you back to Highcastle, you know of someone the orb would want more than you. Get the orb to that person; it’s the only way to save yourself.” Menthos whispers

Disbelief and anger fill Haimish’s cheeks as he pulls free of the warlock’s grip, “What have you done?” 

Paranoia seeps into Eeyore as he watches the exchange between Haimish and Menthos; the ranger pulls his blade out and gets into a defensive stance, “Ok, what’s going on here? I demand to know.” 

“You don’t want to know, put your weapon down and go to the cave’s entrance; we have a message waiting for us there.” Menthos states

“Hell no, I’ll turn my back and you’ll cut me down like the dragon bodies before us. You want the message, you go get it. I’m not letting you out of my sight.” Eeyore responds

The three companions stare each other down with distrust and loathing perceptions, Eeyore maneuvers so that his body is midway in the hallway, to his left the exit, to his right the orb’s room. In front of him across the hallway stood Menthos and Haimish. Menthos staring at Eeyore, Haimish staring at Menthos. 

“Spill it Menthos, he’s not going to let us leave until you tell him what this is all about.” Haimish states

“I can’t, you won’t do what’s necessary if you knew what it was going to do.” Menthos answers

Eeyore shifts nervously, lifting his blade and pointing it at the pair, “Somebody better start explaining.”

“That’s ludicrous, if it’s the right thing why would you telling me affect it?” Haimish questions

“I know you; you’ll find an alternative way and us that. It has to be done this way or we lose more than just time.” Menthos answers

“Haimish! What’s going on?” Eeyore demands

“You need to ask Menthos, this is his plan.” Haimish replies

“Menthos! Explain this.” Eeyore orders

“Shades of grey Eeyore, I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain this to you.” Menthos answers

“Somebody start talking!” Eeyore screams

“Doopa hungry.” The ogre obliges Eeyore

“Hey Doopa, you hungry?” Menthos asks

The giant nods his head in agreement, “Well, Eeyore here doesn’t want us to eat. If he wasn’t standing there we could get you something to eat.” Menthos says

“Stop it, I want answers!” Eeyore shouts, Doopa reaches over and backhands the ranger staggering the aranea and causing him to take his eyes off of Menthos.

Quickly throwing up a darkness invocation, Menthos cloaks Eeyore’s sight and is able to work his way back to the cave’s entrance where a solitary white dragon waits.

“Has the item been removed?” The dragon asks

“Yes, the package will be traveling back to Highcastle within the hour.” Menthos answers

The dragon nods its approval and hands Menthos a scroll, “Your map.”

Menthos takes the scroll and watches the dragon take flight into the falling snow.

“You used me? What have you done to me?” Haimish pleads

“I saved you, to give you a chance to be the hero you’ve always know you could be.” Menthos answers

“Stop circling the truth, what is this?” Haimish demands

“We need to get you to Highcastle so you can work on halting the transformation. Once done we can strike at Ina-Herit and put an end to the weather’s suffering.” Menthos answers

The name struck a pang of recognition within Haimish, “Ina-Herit? As is ancient mummy?” 

“Yes, you know him?” Menthos inquires

“Yes. What does he have to do with the orb?” Haimish asks

“He wanted to create an army of dead and march south from his citadel to conquer, by acquiring this before he does, we’ve delayed that action.” Menthos answers

“Delayed it?” Haimish questions

“The orb’s will eventually will be done, if not with Ina-Herit then with someone else.” Menthos answers

“Then let’s destroy it and be rid of it forever.” Haimish offers

“No, we need it as a distraction, to weaken the mummy enough for us to finish him. I don’t envy the path you must walk for this, but I believe once you are on this path, you will realize that you were the only one capable of performing the task. I already know where you have to go and you know an individual the orb would prefer over yourself. Follow through with that action and we’ll go destroy Ina-Herit.” Menthos explained

Haimish couldn’t believe it, Ina-Herit sat just a few feet from him a week ago. Haimish had the antagonist within strangle reach and here he was now having to deal with his foulness once again. Menthos seemed to be indicating that Kalen would do the same thing with the orb that Ina-Herit would, but that Ina-Herit might be consumed with tracking the orb and not defending his keep the way he should be. Menthos didn’t mention Kalen by name however and wondered if Menthos really knew the vampire “lived”, he decided to keep that part close and not reveal it unless Menthos specifically mentions him. 

Doopa arrives carrying Eeyore, “What happened to light in cave?” 

“It was telling us it was time to go, we’re going to have to climb down the rest of the way, and can you handle him?” Menthos asks

“Duh, Doopa is strongest!” Doopa answers

The three of them descend the mountain’s leg and reach the rest of the cold party two hours later. Haimish explains they need to head back to Highcastle first before assaulting Ina-Herit. 

“Why we’re already up here, why travel all the way back to Highcastle only to turn around and retread our steps?” Xanthos asks

“You can go on ahead; Haimish and I have to go back.” Menthos answers

“They’re planning something insidious, like a demonic invasion or dire lemmings. I’m going to protect myself, there’s no way I let you two out of my sight.” Eeyore spoke up

“What a waste, we could have just gone with atta-a-boy and gotten rich than take the same trip twice in a week.” Aust objects

Haimish turns to leave as Xanthos stops him, “You look different Haimish, as if the color has gone from your cheeks.” 

“I have to get to Highcastle, or you’ll all be in danger.” Haimish explains

“Then let me fly you, we’ll get there in half the time and not lose the distance the rest of them have already walked

The idea was sound to Haimish who agreed to the ride. After Haimish and Xanthos has vanished from view the rest of the party looked over each other.

“I want to stop at Kindoras and resupply before pressing on.” Menthos relayed

“Won’t we need to tell them our plans? How are they going to find us again?” Eeyore inquired

“Xanthos is a smart boy, besides they won’t be back anytime soon, if at all.” Menthos answered

The trip back to Highcastle was quick and as promised Xanthos got Haimish back in half the time of only two days. The shifter tried frequently to pry the truth from the bard, but Haimish held close the reason for his return. Several times Xanthos has looked back at a sleeping Haimish and saw the ravages his complexion was enduring, his skin was extremely pale, his eyes looked sunken and hallow, his fingernails were turned a worrisome shade of black and Haimish had to shield his eyes from the sunlight as they flew.

Once back in Highcastle, Haimish sent Xanthos off to retrieve a cleric of from the god of healing. Once out of his sight, Haimish slipped away and fled to the School of Ancient Knowledge, where he used his knowledge of Kalen’s existence to leverage a one-way trip back to Croy. Upon returning with the cleric, Xanthos feared the worst, that Haimish’s mind has fallen into darkness and the bard would be undead in no time. Xanthos paid for several location spells, all of them failed to detect Haimish on this plane. The priests were unwilling to perform communes for a non-petitioner. It seemed as though the shifter had hit upon a dead end.

The rest of the party made it down to Kindoras where they found waiting for them an excited Adokul who was trying to gather up resources to assist him with solving a little problem for a small town and reaping the rewards for doing so. Adokul eagerly explained his offer to enthralled ears. Menthos however left to go speak with Aleena. He found her room abandoned and her things missing, two pyromancers worked at cleaning up the near empty space.

“Where’s Aleena?” Menthos asked

“Statinistor called her back to the temple to help with her baby.” Came the reply

******************************************************************

In the bowels of the Temple of Kador, two men spoke in hushed voices.

“What do we do with the erinyes now?” Helle asked

“She’s no longer needed, set her free. Tell her she failed to produce the heir and to report to Asmodeus for conditioning.” Statinistor replies

“But she is pregnant as well; wouldn’t it be better to hedge our bets?” Helle asks

“Not needed, the child will be here in a month at the rate of this growth, and with her in stasis nothing is going to intercede.” Statinistor answers

“Our lord’s return to the prime shall be a glorious event!” Helle proclaims

“Yes, and even more so that it was our own member who will deliver him, instead of his own erinyes, we shall have very blessed options once he arrives, tell Ina-Herit to secure the divinity sparks for transport. We’ll need them in three weeks.” Statinistor replies.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Menthos recruitment drive*

As Xanthos flew Haimish back to Highcastle, he observed the physical changes the bard was going through, his hair was falling out in clumps, Haimish’s fingernails grew at an alarming rate and tuned a sickly yellow, the bards teeth turned a mixture of green and black and his frame grew more and more gaunt as the miles passed. Xanthos tried vainly to engage the bard in conversation, Haimish however seemed intent on starring into the black orb as if it were a crystal ball into a forgotten library of lost knowledge. Xanthos changed tactics and just made insightful observations about the land beneath them, hoping that would prompt Haimish to reply, but to no avail. Once Xanthos could see Highcastle’s wall on the horizon, the shifter noted Haimish’s eyes had turned from brown to pitch black to match the sheen on orb the bard carried. 

“I’m going to set you down at the temple to Rontra; I don’t want you wandering the streets.” Xanthos advised

“No, put me down near Moremekar’s place by the cemetery.” Haimish answered with a parched and burning throat

“I think that would be a bad idea, don’t you?” Xanthos questioned

But as the shifter banked to the right to head for the northern part of the city, Haimish leapt from the back of Xanthos’ giant eagle form and _feather fall’d _ down to the ground. Xanthos looped in midair and dove down into the crowd to pick up Haimish; the bard had a few tricks up his sleeve. Haimish turned invisible and waded through the crowd, Xanthos’ awe-inspiring ability of sight allowed him to catch glimpses of the shimmering form even through the mass of marketplace shoppers. 

The shifter turned into a sparrow to better navigate the area and not raise alarm the form of a giant eagle would have above a commoner. After only a few dozen few, Xanthos realized Haimish wasn’t headed for the Dead One’s church at all, Haimish was headed straight for the School of Ancient Knowledge. Concerned about Haimish’s real motives more than ever, the shifter abandoned the chase and flew straight to the school. Xanthos arrived a couple minutes before Haimish could wade through the crowd, turning back into an elf the shifter waited for Haimish to arrive.

“What do you think you are doing?” Xanthos spoke as the invisible Haimish climbed the steps of the school.

“Saving us.” Haimish replied

“Saving us from what?” Xanthos said putting his hand out to halt the advancing Haimish 

“From Orcus.” Haimish answers and shoves Xanthos off the steps and faces the school’s doors, “I come to negotiate with the daywalker!” 

Xanthos quickly recovers and leaps back to the steps in hopes of wresting the orb from Haimish’s grip, the always alert school however acted instantly when Haimish mentioned the experiment and teleported the bard inside the school and Xanthos only grabbed empty space. Xanthos paced in writhing anger wondering what his options were next, he tried pounding on the door, vandalizing the steps, hurling curses at those he assumed were inside laughing at his failed attempts to gain entry. Then a new passion caught fire, this was all Menthos’ fault, he would fly back to the party and force the truth out of that pompous ass if he has to turn into a tick and suck it out of him. 

Adokul busied himself regaling the hopeful treasure seekers of the riches promised to him by someone called Anbhas Ceirtlin, this individual promised Adokul all the riches found if he could lead a team on scouting a fact-finding mission.

“To where?” Menthos asks

“It’s underground; I think he was afraid of the place. Probably too dark and spooky for his taste.” Adokul answers

“What is this Anbhas Ceirtlin?” Menthos inquires

“A man with the ability to follow through with his offer.” Adokul answers

“You never answered the question.” Menthos presses

“What difference does it make? The man says we’ll get to keep everything, then we’ll get to keep everything.” Adokul replies

“True, who cares if he’s a kobold or a cambion if we’re getting some due reward from this then I say we should check it out. I don’t know about the rest of you but I’m not exactly swimming in the gold right now.” Eeyore offers

“I agree, I learn nothing by staying in this keep. Only through explorations of forgotten locals can I gain power.” Dahlgren interjects

“Doopa ready to stomp something, Doopa get itchy feeling in Doopa hands.” The ogre announces

“See it’s nearly unanimous considering the drow is passed out drunk, stay here if you want the rest of us go forth to glory! Let’s go everybody.” Adokul rallies.

“What? Now? I can’t go now, I just impressed myself by making it from Hledra to here in two days walking. No way are my feet ready to wander around in the dark looking for the boogeyman.” Eeyore complains

“But I can get you there in no time!” Adokul pleads

“And then I’d still be walking around in the dark, I’m waiting until morning.” Eeyore counters
“I agree a good night’s rest would be very helpful indeed.” Kourk answers

“Aren’t you still hallucinating you’re a dwarf? Why would you be tired?” Adokul replies

“Hallucinating? I don’t follow you’re train of thought wizard.” Kourk answers

“I can’t believe this, all of you are ready and excited to go and then it’s wait! That’s ridiculous!” Adokul bellows

“Maybe tomorrow after a good praying we’ll feel more inclined to travel?” Menthos says

“Religion is a tool for the weak minded to justify their lot in life, I don’t need smoke and mirrors and faith in a rock to help me, I make my own power!” Adokul roars

“Point of order. Do you plan on healing us with your lightening bolt of burning scorchness, or would do you plan for them to die of disease after scraping their hands on a moss patch? I’ve never seen a _magic missile _ of healing before perhaps you’ve located some obscure spell?” Kourk retorts

“This whole keep is filled with useless wastes of nursemaids, Menthos can pick us out a spunky one and we’ll drag them along for healing, we can leave tonight and be rich beyond our dreams tomorrow!” Adokul addresses

“Sure, you convert and I’ll be more than happy to set you up with a spunky little firecracker.” Menthos counters

“Convert? Are mocking me? Or are you that stupid you can’t follow a conversation!” Adokul rants

“Calm down, we said we’d go in the morning, what’s sixteen hours going to cost us anyway?” Eeyore replies

“Rip his nuts off!” Aust slurs drunkenly

“See it’s not even dinner time yet and the drow is one alcohol swab away from cirrhosis.” Menthos points out

Dahlgren helps his friend to his feet and leads him away towards his room, whilst the rest of the party also gets up and head towards the dining hall for dinner. Adokul stands dejected, but does not teleport away. Instead the wizard tracks down Doopa with a plea.

“Doopa, would it be alright if I bunked with you tonight?” Adokul requests

“Sure, if can stand celebration of happy colon.” Doopa responds

That night as Adokul tried in vain to ignore the constant gas seepage from Doopa, the wizard tossed and turned in his bed unable to get comfortable. He thought about getting up and going for a walk but quickly dismissed that as a bad idea. Instead he grabbed his blanket and huddled in the furthest corner of the room away from Doopa. Scrunched up in the fetal position, the wizard propped his head against the cold stone wall and tried to get some rest.

Menthos stood atop the cold and blustery gatehouse, watching the sun quickly recede behind the Majestics, Dahlgren approaches from behind and stands east to watch the darkening sky overtake the last vestiges of the day’s light.

“What troubles you so, that you feel the need to long for the return of object that revisits us daily?” Dahlgren asks

“I see I’m no longer adept at hiding from the keep if you were able to spot me up here.” Menthos answers

“I was coming up here anyway, I’ve searched the patterns of the keep proper and found none, I planned to search the night horizon here as well.” Dahlgren answers

“What are you looking for?” Menthos inquires

“Patterns, symbols, hints at something beyond reach yet once so close. I derive my power from finding these fonts and creating a mutual benefiting pact with them.” Dahlgren answers

“So you talk to dead people.” Menthos remarks

“In a way, I talk to their essence. They no longer exist on this plane physically, but they long to embrace the memory.” Dahlgren replies

“Must prove frustrating, I don’t think you’ve found a thing yet to help you.” Menthos comments

“Quite the contrary, your faith in Kador intrigues me.” Dahlgren states

An awkward silence fills the space as Menthos wonders what Dahlgren is getting at, Dahlgren however leaves the remark hanging there, “Nevertheless, you have still failed to tell me what it is you are doing up here.”

“I see the coming storm, the clouds for it haven’t even formed yet, though I know it comes. I thought that by coming here I could expunge that knowledge, I find that the harder part.” Menthos answers

Adokul is startled awake by a terrifying nightmare of him trying to out run the pursuing Anbhas Ceirtlin, pleading with him for more time. Backed against a cavern wall Adokul tries in vain to ascend the slope backwards. Suddenly a piercing pain in his left forearm forces the wizard back to reality, throwing open his eyes Adokul just makes out the dissolving form of a smoke mephit as it returns to the fireplace. A quick glance down at his arm finds a needle mark with a rapidly expanding area of grey flesh. Adokul reaches over to grab his arm in a worthless attempt to stop the poison but he grabs cold hard stone instead.

In the morning Doopa retrieves Menthos to inform him of Adokul’s odd state, they find a statue of Adokul sitting against the wall looking down at his forearm.

“Security has been breached, get Gorn. Doopa can you please bring Adokul and follow me?” Menthos says

Menthos has Doopa carry Adokul to Aleena’s quarters and place him in the secret viewing room. Lighting the brazier the flame it creates forms a window to Statinistor.

“My you’ve become resourceful haven’t you?” the high priest comments

“Kindoras has been breached by an assassin.” Menthos informs the priest

“Really? That’s alarming, who was killed?” Statinistor asks

“A new convert, I believe we may have a holy war on our hands.” Menthos answers

“What? Show me this death.” Statinistor demands

Menthos parts to the side to show the crouched statue of Adokul.

“That’s not a convert. He’s not even a priest.” Statinistor says

“Not true, just last night I was extolling the virtues of a Kador worship and he was intrigued enough to return with me to Aleena’s room where he read from the Book of Fire and expressed his need to reform. We planned to baptize him in the fire not even one half hour from now.” Menthos bluffs

“Who else knew of his turning?” Statinistor asks

“No one except maybe his god, Orcus.” Menthos bluffs again

“Send him through the gate and we shall check him over at once.” Statinistor requests

Menthos has Doopa toss Adokul through the fire gate. An hour later Statinistor returns with news.

“It’s a very nasty poison the only way I can help him is if I change his make-up a little to better fight the poison long enough for me to neutralize it. It will likely make him less than human.” Statinistor advises

“If it brings him closer to Kador, I believe he would cherish the change.” Menthos bluffs yet again.


----------



## Jon Potter

This can't end well.

But I must confess that I'm intrigued: two party members transformed/transforming into something else. How fun!


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*A thorn is removed*

As the rest of the party gathered in the keep’s common area awaiting Adokul’s arrival to lead them to a promised treasure hoard, Menthos and Doopa waited in Aleena’s quarters for the result of Statinistor’s experiment. The drab morning was broken up by the grating voice of a veteran solider.

“Where is Menthos!” Gorn shouts as he shoves his way purposely through the loitering party, he receives shrugs and empty stares.

“Arrest them all on suspicion.” Gorn orders his contingent of keep guards
“What? What did I do?” Eeyore asks

“Suspicion of what?” Dahlgren inquires

“Suspicion of pissin’ me off.” Gorn snaps his forearm at the party and the guards move in to shackle the party.

Satisfied with his morning accomplishment, Gorn storms off towards the priest area of the keep to find Menthos. He makes immediately for Aleena’s former quarters and discovers his quarry there.

“You’re under arrest for attempted rioting, screaming intruder and sending the whole keep into a panic, what did you think would happen?” Gorn declares while motioning to his guards to arrest Doopa.

Doopa hefts his weapon up ready to fight off the men, “Take it easy there ogre, I’ll knock knee you into a Hoblin.” Gorn states

“Hoblin?” Menthos questions

“Like a goblin but more lame, maybe you ain’t got the message ‘bout Aleena’s leave of absence. When she ain’t here I’m in charge.” Gorn replies

“So it’s your fault security was breached by an assassin last night, I’m sure the keep will sleep more comfortable knowing they’re under the ever vigilant eye of a blind person.” Menthos responds 

“Funny man are ya?” Gorn says as he approaches the warlock, “You’d sound a lot funnier beggin’ fer mercy.” Gorn shoves his knee into Menthos’ crotch and then smashes his mace in the same spot to drive home his point.

Menthos collapses to the floor and empties his stomach contents over Gorn’s boots.
“That’s gonna cost ya.” Gorn utters

Doopa whips his weapon around and batters three guards into the wall, he turns to face the remaining eight guards as Gorn throws a small cube onto the floor beneath the barbarian. Doopa’s attention is diverted long enough to see the cube expand rapidly and encase him in a small room of force.

“I told ya ogre, you’re gonna learn respect from a dwarf if it takes me killin’ it out of ya.” Gorn declares

“Perhaps you should be taught respect to properly learn the meaning of the word?” a voice behind Menthos challenges

“Eh, who’s hiding back there, get out here now ‘fore I drag you out through your own puke.” Gorn demands

“I have a much better idea.” With the flick of his wrist the cage around Doopa disappears and in the span of two seconds, several guards used their eyes to widen in disbelief for the last time. 

The man stepped forward to stand next to the hunched Menthos, Doopa thought he saw Adokul for a brief moment but the man’s features were all wrong. Short yellow horns protruded from the man’s hairless scalp. The man’s complexion  was somewhere between rotting flesh and burnt hair, his smile was a razor filled field of pain as his teeth came to impossibly sharp points. 

“So’s ya want to fight do ya?” Gorn offers as he steps in to swing at the newcomer. Then the room went dark, pitch black and Gorn missed wildly with his swing.

Doopa found it easy picking off the struggling guards as they stumbled blindly in the darkness. Gorn swung again and again but only managed to get winded in the effort.

“Come out here and fight like a man.” Gorn challenges

“I believe you’ve got one heck of an inferiority complex, luckily I have just the thing to correct that character flaw of yours.” The newcomer states

With the utterance of a string of arcane words the spell was cast and Adokul slapped Gorn across the face to deliver the spell. The darkness was lifted and the now fiendish Adokul helped Menthos to his feet as Doopa scanned the room for more victims and spotted the fleeing female goblin and began to chase her down.

“Adokul?” Menthos spits out.

“Yes, thanks to you and the glory of Kador, I have been remade on the forge of fire into something better, stronger, faster.” Adokul explains

“Impressive.” Statinistor’s voice intoned from the flame gate, “You have brought a most worthy addition to our ranks Menthos, and you have my thanks. Your deed shall not go unrecognized, I will personally see to it that you are properly bequeathed.”

“I live to serve.” Menthos answered

“Yes, as do I thanks to your compassion Menthos. Come let us go find some non-believers to immolate.” Adokul responds and heads for the door.

Menthos turns back to the image of Statinistor.

“Something else you wish to ask of me?” Statinistor inquires

Menthos pauses and sighs deeply, before answering, “No I guess not.”

By the time Adokul and Menthos reach the common area, Doopa is chasing the new Gorn in a circle around the chained party while Eeyore bemoans his fate.

“Hear me out oh commoners of Kindoras. For I have done nothing to deserve to be treated with such thoughtlessness. I demand the local barrister be called to adjudicate my case.” Eeyore calls out

“Help me, someone get the ogre off my back!” Gorn squeals as he races around the circle of prisoners

The keep guards are unsure what to make of the situation, Gorn and the guards who went with him, haven’t returned and the people he went to go arrest are walking free.

“Release them and I will get the six hundred pound gorilla off your back.” Adokul offers

“Fine, anything. Do as he says!” Gorn shouts, but his guards who have been trained against magical attacks, dismiss the female goblin’s rants as the cries of a savage.

Gorn’s new form quickly tires and the more robust Doopa catches up to him and pounds the creature into goop ending Gorn’s life. A wry smile crosses Adokul’s lips as the abyssally connected creature finds the conclusion amusing. 

Aust frees himself and with the help of Doopa they free the rest of the group, this puts the guards on alert and they brandish weapons.

“Hear me loyals of Kindoras, Gorn’s faith faltered in the face of his lord Kador. His death was long and painful as he saw the end closing in on him. Do not tread upon the ground he walked, you must find your own path through the fire and be reborn upon the forge of Kador as I have been. I assure you that the pyromancers will assume stewardship of this keep until a more suitable person can be found to continue its rise to glory and affect happenings in the southern Majestics. I trust that you will grant Kador’s will in this.” Adokul speaks to the amassed keep.

His words inspiring hope among the fanatical, Adokul motions for the party to follow him out of the keep, “Let us go and claim the riches I promised you, as I will correct an individual who was sloppy last night. His failure will need to be addressed.”

The party heads off to the southwest as Xanthos races back from Highcastle to intercept them and have it out with Menthos. Xanthos reaches the party an hour from their destination, Xanthos dives in at Menthos hoping to get his attention if his moves, or preferably knock him into a new climate zone. The warlock spots the diving bird and manages to dodge its main body while receiving two claw marks across his face. Xanthos lands, transforms and gets in the warlock’s face.

“What did you do to Haimish?” Xanthos demands

“I did nothing to him, he took the orb of his own volition.” Menthos answers

“You sent him back to the school to die!” Xanthos responds and slaps the taste out of Menthos’ mouth. 

“Hold friend, I assure you that whatever you feel Haimish is doomed to go through, was meant to happen. You must have faith in the divine course of free will.” Adokul intervenes

Xanthos turns to face this new addressor, his other senses beyond sight tell him the man before him is Adokul, “what happened to you?”

“I have been reborn through the fires on the forge of Kador.” Adokul responds

“Oh no, not another one. I’ll deal with the charm person spell he put on you in a moment.” Xanthos retorts

“There is no spell to counter, I am who I am and I have Menthos to thank for it. Perhaps a discussion in what drives your passion is in order?” Adokul answers

“Back away flame boy, this is between me and the liar.” Xanthos remarks

“I can offer you salvation and a part of the eternal flame of Kador.” Adokul replies

“You have nothing I want nor desire.” Xanthos answers

“You are incorrect, are you aware that forest fires clear the underbrush of dead and ground clogging debris to bring about a new growth of plant life. For without the cleansing fire your forest would choke itself and die. You need me more than you think you do.” Adokul counters
“Haimish took the orb to buy us time. Our enemy is an ancient mummy with many enemies. This diversion that Haimish goes to create will allow us to get close to him and strike while his resources are diverted.” Menthos states

“Oh for the sweet price of ignorance there but I depart.” Aust offers


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*Digging in the dirt, to find the places I got hurt*

Adokul led the party southwest through a barren landscape not even the Steppe Barbarians would raid over. They passed small communities of nomadic herders as they hiked. The strange site of armored men moving across the landscape sent the herders scampering into hiding among the small rocks and boulder debris that littered the plain. 

After three days of marching Adokul finally signaled they had arrived at their destination, a small village next to a petite stream stood out against the brown backdrop of the horizon. To Xanthos there seemed to be quite a bit more people meandering through the couple of streets than there were buildings to house them all. There were no visible buildings on the outskirts of the village and no beaten paths to mark if there were outlying farms.

“I have returned to save your village as promised, I bring with me the tools with which to mend the rift and bring closure to your problem. In the name of Kador I burn for you.” Adokul recites.

“What problem are you talking about? I thought we were seeing someone named Anbhas Ceirtlin?” Eeyore questions

“And we are, but we must go through the sinkhole to meet with him.” Adokul says still pressing on through the village.

“What sinkhole?” Eeyore asks

“That sinkhole.” Adokul points out.

More like an open wound than a sinkhole, Xanthos immediately spotted that the edge of the sinkhole did not angle down towards the bottom of the hole. It looked as if the top layer of soil was an egg shell and the village sat on hollow ground. There was no telltale water reservoir at the bottom of the hole either, just darkness, even beyond what his exceptional vision could see.

“That’s no sinkhole, that’s not natural.” Xanthos remarks

“The same could be said of you, now come along don’t dawdle we mustn’t keep or host waiting.” Adokul replies and feather falls down the huge maw in the ground.

Xanthos grabs Doopa, Eeyore, Dahlgren, Kourk, and Aust and transforms into a giant eagle to fly them down the hole.

“Hey what about me?” Menthos shouts

“I’m not carrying you; find your own way down, preferably fast and hard.” Xanthos answers

Menthos activates his spider climb and steps out over the edge of the hole, his foot pulls his body over and under the ledge, swinging him one-hundred and eighty degrees and resting his feet on the underside of the ground he was just standing on. Taking a moment to orientate himself, Menthos walks along the inside top of the hole toward the edge and then down towards where the party waited. 

The walk took most of the day as Menthos was in no hurry to get to where he needed to go, this was Adokul’s mission anyway, Menthos was merely here to increase the size of his wealth and take his mind of other troubling matters. It was with great anxiety that Adokul paced for his arrival.

“You took your time getting here.” Adokul addresses Menthos

“Yes, the elevator was broken so I had to walk it. Besides you don’t fan the flames of passion by igniting the fires of fandomhood, otherwise the fanee becomes the faner and then the fanny gets burned.” Menthos replies

“It’s as if your colon is attached to the back of your tongue.” Xanthos comments

“So where is this host you speak so highly of?” Eeyore wonders

“This way, follow me.” Adokul motions

The mage leads them through twisting tunnels and dripping caves to a carved out space replete with a sitting area and tapestries on the wall.

“Have a seat; I’m sure he’ll be along shortly.” Adokul advises

 Dahlgren waves off the reclining gesture and moves to investigate the tapestries on the walls. Aust tries out every available seat he can find looking for the one that suits him best, finally deciding on the stone floor. Eeyore and Doopa sit down in wide sturdy wooden chairs while Xanthos sniffs the air and comes to a disconcerting conclusion.

“Your host isn’t natural is he? In fact I bet he doesn’t even walk.” Xanthos states

“Your senses run true changeling, I do not need legs to transport myself through my domain.” Anbhas Ceirtlin had shown himself finally in all his beholder glory.

Doopa and Aust immediately leap to the feet, weapons readied. Eeyore tries to slink away from his seat and get behind Doopa. 

“I see you are more resilient than I gave you credit for flesh bag.” Anbhas stares at Adokul

“I have found faith your poisonous action held no power over it.” Adokul answers

“Appears to have changed you nonetheless. Have you returned to complete your bargain, or is this your way of trying to renege on our agreement?” Anbhas speaks

“I have brought companions who seek the thrill of adventure just as I have, they will help me complete the mission.” Adokul states

“You wish their assistance?” Anbhas asks

“With it your request shall be completed by sunrise.” Adokul states

“Hmm, perhaps you should not be so hasty in your assessment of a problem you have not even seen the question to? Maybe a scouting foray should be your next step?” Anbhas offers

“If you wish to extend the timeframe I have no quarrel with that.” Adokul replies

“I extend nothing, I do not tolerate failure. Your overconfidence in this matter will only bring about exposure to myself in this matter. Subtlety will win the day, not your grounded way of dirt combat.” Anbhas says

“Because I can be punctured by an arrow and not blow myself into oblivion proves that your primitive method of balloonish warfare is an infinity loop of stupidity.” Aust comments

“Drow, I will assume you’re implying how you got down my hole and not that you wish to end up disintegrated and flushed away with my children’s urine.” Anbhas answers with two of his stalked eyes pointed at the drow.

Xanthos heard the shuffling of many feet all around the party, at least his children weren’t beholders as well. 

“Pfft, what power has any windbag carried for longer then the breeze blew him. You’re a marshmallow of oppressive gas; you wouldn’t frighten a rat even if it was in your mouth.” Aust retorts

“Very well then.” Anbhas aims an eyestalk at Aust and a sickly green light beams its way onto Aust’s chest. The drow’s eyes grow sullen and his face seems to lose its youthful complexion. 

The large central of Anbhas scans the rest of the party and settles on Adokul again, “chose your most capable person and then I’ll send you forth to investigate.”

“I chose Xanthos; his abilities will be most helpful in scouting.” Adokul answers

“Then he stays here as collateral, the rest of your surface walkers will go with you, you have four hours to return with the knowledge I require before the changeling ends up as a dinner guest.” Anbhas says laughing

The party stands in defiance of the beholder.

“What you wish for me to provider you with the starting gun? Very well!” Anbhas rotates his top most eyestalk and emits a yellow beam from it. Where the beam lands matter is disintegrated, the beholder uses the beam to herd the party toward an exit near Menthos as his “children” come out of hiding to confiscate Xanthos.

Anbhas then utters an arcane word and a wall of fire erupts between him and the hallway the party was corralled into, “Hurry, time’s wasting and I grow hungry from all this talking.” 

Xanthos is led away down a side tunnel, he notices most of the creatures are troglodytes with massive heads sporting at least two extra eyes, some with upwards of six extra eyes. All of them are functional as they follow Xanthos’ movement down the hallway; they lead the shifter into a common room filled with last night’s meal, some of it still trying to escape.

The rest of the party turns to Adokul.

“Now what? You lost the only tracker we have.” Dahlgren states

“I can track.” Eeyore speaks up

“Moron, you lost the only tracker we have and the only cleric I’ll let touch me to fix me of this weakening condition.” Aust mutters to Adokul

“I can track! What are we looking for?” Eeyore shouts

“Xanthos! Dahlgren shouts back a reply to Eeyore

“People let’s be civil about this, obviously this beholder is sadistic and wishes to put us in harms way for his personal enjoyment. I counter that we instead mount an offensive to rid this part of the underdark from an obviously disturbed and uncaring force of evil and replace him with a more stable form of aristocracy.” Kourk suggests

“I vote myself in as duke; the rest of you serfs can bow down before me.” Aust grinds through his teeth.

“I plan on completing the mission, retrieving Xanthos, and keeping my winnings. Adokul says, “Menthos what say you?”

“I say we do both, collect our winnings and kill the beholder and take his stuff too.” Menthos answers

“Doopa like that answer best.” The ogre agrees

“Okay, but when we kill him, I want first choice at eyestalks.” Adokul states

Adokul leads them on into the crushing darkness of the underground, when the party reaches an intersection Dahlgren halts the group.

“It occurs to me that you may not know what it is we’re looking for nor where it is located Adokul.” Dahlgren voices his concern

“Nonsense, Anbhas gave me explicit directions the first time I was here. There is a floating crystal in a huge cavern up ahead. Anbhas wants us to check it out.” Adokul answers

“Check it out for what, a geode?” Dahlgren questions

“Apparently he can’t get close to it so he needs us to go instead of sending his children to do the job.” Adokul answers

“Sounds like a suicide mission to me.” Eeyore relates

“Possibly, but where the beholder is scared to go, I see a potential ally waiting to take his place.” Adokul replies

A few more twists and turns brings the party to a tunnel with a bright light shinning from the end of it.

“Daylight?” Eeyore asks

“Impossible, we’ve been heading deeper. This is likely what we’re looking for.” Kourk answers

The party reaches the end of the tunnel and finds themselves several hundred feet up the side of a cavern wall, the opposite side of the cavern is at least a mile away and the center of the cavern hangs a slowly spinning crystal shard which illuminates the entire cavern.

“I’ll reconnaissance for the front door.” Adokul says as he casts _fly_ on himself and steps out into the cavern.

The mage flies for the underside first, the crystal spans all but fifty feet from the top and bottom of the cavern which is nearly a mile tall, as he comes in near the bottom of the crystal, his spell wavers and ends suddenly. Adokul falls sixty feet to the cavern floor, landing in a stream of water created by runoff from the crystal’s bottom point. 
“Well that was interesting.” Dahlgen says as he steps out and levitates to the bottom of the cavern taking Aust with him

Menthos hands Doopa and Kourk some rope and starts to spider climb up the cavern wall.

“What about me?” Eeyore says

“Can’t you spider climb too? The rope is so we can drop down on the top of that crystal.” Menthos says

“Aren’t you concerned for Adokul?” Eeyore asks

“Not so much.” Menthos answers and continues his ascent.

Once over the crystal, Menthos and Eeyore lower Kourk onto the top point, then Doopa. 

“You’re next.” Menthos says to Eeyore 

The ranger begins his descent carefully, taking his time. Not wanting to wait, Menthos releases his grip from the cavern’s ceiling and falls the fifty feet into Doopa’s arms. Eeyore crashes onto the crystals top shortly after.

“Sorry, grip gave out. I’m not a strong as you think I am apparently.” Menthos states


----------



## Jon Potter

Very interesting...

I like your beholder; he's a better Eye Tyrant than mine was.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*A bard in Hell part 1*

Haimish arrived back in Croy with much less fanfare this time, his now insipid colored hide hid the humanity beneath it well. Like a wet heavy blanket, Haimish found that no matter which way he shrugged or stood; its influence clung to him. The stench of decay and sweat oozed from his pores, the cologne of death calling her handmaiden home. Haimish winced at the bright sun, the bloated ball of light furrowed his blackening soul taunting his humanity with memories of daylight and summer rains. 

	Haimish lurched from the teleport circle and willed his moldering body down the white marble steps and onto the ironwood walkway that guided guests around the island. He picked a direction and headed off on its worn path, not knowing when his prey might sense him or if the artifact would finish its job; transform him completely and rid him of this useless conscious a vestige of humankind that kept his desire to tear into the throat of every being he passed along the trail in check for now. 

	Haimish withdrew the jar of Kalen’s grave dirt from within his backpack; he noted the level of dirt was about half the jar. Far less than when he had first visited the island, Haimish knew his remaining teleports would need to count as he did not want to be stranded in a place on this island with no way out. Haimish thought about trying to see if concentrating on his query would bring either himself to the hunted or the hunted to him but the awkward meeting in the middle of the path would bring unwanted eyes upon him. He needed to hide, this form disgusted him and his will to remain human took over and forced the new personality to the side of head subconscious. 

An elven mage sauntered by Haimish’s decrepit form and the bard smelled blood as the elf passed by. Haimish found his mouth over salivating and he began to drool uncontrollably. He ears picked up on the fluttering beats of the elven heart; his hearing was picking up the elven’s heart’s chambers as blood rushed from side to side in the mage’s chest. His sight watched with delight as the elven’s throat veins pumped in time with the beating of his heart. Haimish reached out with his creative mind to envision what his attack upon the man’s throat would look like, feel like, and taste like. Yes, the taste warm and salty with a strong copper taste, as if licking the stew residue from the bottom of a new copper pot. Haimish found himself staring at the back of the man as he walked away, his jaw slack and saliva dripping off his graying desiccating chin. He quickly slammed his teeth shut and forced himself to turn away from the elf, looking back up the walkway, Haimish could feel the heaviness of a dozen stares as they watched the intriguing man amble on. 

	Haimish walked another hour under the oppressive sun, his body begged him to seek shelter, and his soul begged him to fly towards it. Haimish found himself back at the dinner spot where he handed over the blood rock only days ago. He sank into a chair and waved off a waitress. Staring out over the reflective water, Haimish reached into his pocket and pulled out a slip of paper Menthos had given him in the dark of the White Dragon’s treasure cave. Haimish twisted and turned it in his fingers, letting his mind wonder his body took it to dark places that involved slowly killing the tiefling by gouging out an inch of skin a day and using those pieces to recreate a outward map of Menthos’ body right in front of the tiefling so he could watch himself slowly teleport. Haimish felt the skin on his face crinkle as he realized he was smiling. Shoving that though into the recesses of his mind, Haimish shook his head and slouched back into the chair again. This time however his contemplation was interrupted by the padding of leather boots coming up from behind him. Haimish could smell the creature intensely, a smell that gagged his soul but energized his body.

“What took you so long; I’ve been on the island for over an hour and had to walk all the way here before you could grace me with your presence.” Haimish asks

“When my associates told me you were back, I prepared myself to cripple you for eternity, when they told me what you had apparently come back as, I found that I could not contain my laughter for quite some time.” Kalen answered

“I missed you too, I want to make a deal with you; take this sphere off my hands and then let me go in peace.” Haimish offers

Haimish produces the dull light absorbing orb, much to the amazement of Kalen. The vampire stares in disbelief wondering if it really is what Haimish thinks it is. 

“How did you come about ownership of that?” Kalen inquires

“A nice dragon gave it to me in exchange for ridding his lands of lederhosen wearing orcs with curly hair.” Haimish answers

“What makes you believe you have any bargaining power at all?” Kalen accuses folding his arms across his chest 

Haimish stands up, shoving his chair out of the way, a week ago Kalen stood six inches over Haimish; now the distance had halved, “Because when this thing gets done with me, I’ll be more powerful than you’ll ever hope to be and my legions of the damned won’t be content to sit on a rock in the middle of an ocean whittling their tongues away while you pine for days gone by where a master of the night actually operated at night!” Haimish fired back

“Ha! I have more power than you know wannabe. The more you posture the funnier you get.” Kalen answers

Haimish pulls out his ace card and hopes it’s enough, “I know who you bow to, I know the pain that was wrought when you went home empty handed without the rock. I know what he’ll do to you when you don’t come back with the sphere.” 

Stunned silence and fear washed over the vampire’s face, Kalen reeled in the level of understanding Haimish seemed to pull out of his arse, Kalen thought over Haimish’s words, seeking some form of redemption. He would not be beholden to Haimish any further. The bard’s taunting call and memory needed to be dealt with permanently. However the sphere could not be used again until it had finished with Haimish. There had to be another way, and Kalen would need to keep Haimish preoccupied until then.

“Not here, I will not discuss terms with you out in the open. Follow me.” Kalen says and walks off towards the coast to the east.

“Huh uh, I don’t trust you. There’s no way I’m going anywhere with you that doesn’t include the descriptors public and busy.” Haimish retorts

“Well, you’re going to have to trust me there’s not really an option for you.” As Kalen completed his sentence, Haimish’s body jerkily waded towards the vampire.

“What?” Haimish says trying to will his feet to a stop

“You forget your place child of the night, for I was elder before they called it that, and you are merely a pawn, for my master.” Kalen answered

“It is you who are the pawn; I have no free will to choose my path. Apparently you fear my potential so much that you will destroy me when I offer you the gift freely. Your master must be pleased with the hands off control he has over your thoughts.” Haimish responds

Kalen smirks, “You still try to bore a hole in a vacuum looking for water.” 

“Earth without water becomes dust for the wind to use to sculpt the defiant to nothing.” Haimish replies

Kalen ponders the thought for a moment temporarily releasing Haimish from his control. The bard stumbles backwards and falls over as he violently regained control over his legs and threw them in reverse as quick as he could. Haimish could only hope Menthos was right and this was the way to Kalen’s buried reasoning. 

“Remember why you sought to harness the sunlight? Was it because Ina-Herit needed you during the day or was it because you needed the day?” Haimish spoke

Kalen’s eyes went reflective and Haimish couldn’t discern whether it was the comment itself or whether it Haimish confirming to Kalen that indeed he knew who Kalen got his marching orders from and exposing that relationship would likely not win him any friends amongst the populace of Croy. 

Kalen looked back at Haimish; the bard had felt that look before, only this time it held no power, Haimish could not say whether that meant Kalen put nothing behind it or whether Haimish’s transformation had progressed to the point of where it no longer held sway over Haimish.

“Follow me.” Kalen said
Haimish threw a party in his head at those words as the two men walked south along the coast, parallel to a reddening sun.


Dalhgren floated down towards the fallen Adokul and set Aust down alongside the downed mage. Adokul looks up at the floating Dahlgren.

“How is it you’re still flying?” Adokul asks

“My ability comes from a different source than yours; it does not need the same inherent base.” Dalhgren responds

“Silly human, the underdark is for drow. Once again the surface dwellers try to invade below only to end up all wet face down in a ditch wondering why life isn’t fair, when you really should be asking why the torch bearer doesn’t get fed up with your stupidity and turn your bowels into a crock pot of dinner surprise. Now you think about that when the drow are getting their feet licked clean by your grandchildren.” Aust offers

“You have a great deal of anger dark one, maybe one day you will learn to stop internalizing it and start using it to get from whiney to mighty.” Adokul responds

The mage gets up and wipes the excess water from the front of his robes, “Dalhgren, could you be so kind as to alight me to the crystal’s surface?” the mage asks

Dahlgren concedes and as the mage moves to take hold of Dalhgren’s hand, Aust trips the mage causing him to fall backwards into the stream this time, “loser.”

“That was uncalled for.” Adokul says

“Yes is was, I do not believe you requested it, however it was on the menu and I felt compelled to give you the full meal.” Aust answers

“I’ll take Doopa; you can carry Kourk down the side.” Eeyore offers

“Fine, but when you fall, make sure Doopa loses his weapon first. Otherwise he’s likely to make a pillow out of you before you even reach halfway to the group.” Menthos comments

Eeyore dismisses the tiefling with a hand gesture and wraps the ogre’s arms around his neck and begins to spider climb down the top of the crystal. 

“Well, you ready?” Menthos asks

“You won’t drop me to save a perceived threat to your hairdo again will you?” Kourk asks

“Please you’re the only one that could heal me if I were to fall.” Menthos answers 

Kourk readies himself and climbs aboard Menthos’ back as the warlock begins to descend the crystal as well. After about ten feet Kourk adjusts his grip and moves to grasping Menthos’ neck with his hands.

“Ack! You’re choking me!” Menthos gasps

“You’re going to fast, you’re going to slip and fall! Dwarves weren’t made to descend this way it’s undignified.” Kourk replies

“We are going to fall if you don’t let go!” Menthos gasps

“I can’t this is the best grip I can find.” Kourk replies

“Is that what your kind are calling it these days? Choking the tiefling? If you can’t wait until we’re both on solid ground to find your happy place then we’re both going to die.” Menthos wheezes.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

Jon Potter said:
			
		

> Very interesting...
> 
> I like your beholder; he's a better Eye Tyrant than mine was.




Wait until the party comes back with their findings. Then the tyant comes out.


----------



## Hairy Minotaur

*A bard in hell 2*

Kalen led Haimish to a cave entrance on the western coast of Croy, Haimish deduced this allowed Kalen’s “children” to exit the cave at the earliest possible moment when the sun set. The walls of the cave were dry and the air was stale as if it too had died and been brought back against its will. The ceiling was even more disconcerting with its long scars gouged into the very stone by creatures coming and going with fear and excitement, like the back of a lover they showed the passage of things best left unknown. 

	All through the winding passages Kalen led the bard through a forced silence of understanding; a macabre procession to the hangman’s noose, Haimish couldn’t help but feel as though he was being brought to his demise. Resolution to the journey came in the form of a hallway, whose opposite side from where Haimish entered was lined with cages, the kennel was devoid of life but not unoccupied. Haimish couldn’t help but gaze upon the wretched creatures that railed against their metal prisons, conflicted by the emotions welling up within him, Haimish felt both disgusted and fascinated. 

“Even a man without fear needs loyal guardians of his possessions.” Kalen’s voice shook Haimish from his staring.

“What are they?” Haimish asked hoping for a response that would allow his conscious to accept this treatment.

“Odds and ends, that and that. A kobold here, a human there. A dog here, a pseudodragon there. That one’s blood was worth the chase, can you imagine it Haimish? You’re running through the glades of an ancient elven forest, no sound except for the beating of a draconic heart, the strong smell of fear tearing through its veins like a goblin mob sensing weakness in their leader. Even the less ancient treant’s revulsion at your presence is nothing they can do anything about. Even though you can’t see your query, you can taste it on your tongue and you know that no matter how fast it flees, no matter how many hiding places it finds you will never tire of the chase you will find what it is you’re searching for.” Kalen relates

“I’m sure the dragon regrets its decisions that led to being in a place you frequented.” Haimish replied

“The chase is greatest when they tire themselves out running from death, they always stop and look around assuring themselves they run far enough and fast enough to escape your grasp, hope begins to replenish their energy stores again and then you appear from behind a burnt out corpse of a tree, fitting that from a place of death you emerge to grant them the one thing they never want while you’re giving it to them. Ironic that they have no problems with your gift once you’ve finished unwrapping it for them.” Kalen continues

“You’re a twisted man.” Haimish states

“The best part is when they re-gift, for that is the ultimate show of respect.” Kalen’s voice came from behind Haimish even though the vampire stood in front of him.

	Kalen’s face contorted into a strained mocking smile, confused Haimish turned to look behind him to see Kalen standing behind him as well. Whipping his head back around himself he finds Kalen standing there as well.

“Nice trick.” Haimish says

“What? Did you think I would watch the Blood Ice recede from my possession willfully? I fear you have grossly underestimated my cravings.” The Kalen behind him answers

	It was with those words that Haimish understood the trap he had walked into as the Kalen that led him down into this kennel transformed before his eyes into the rakshasa that he had sold the bleeding rock to. 

“So what happens now? You watch me become one of your cronies and then you get the sphere anyway when it’s done with me?” Haimish sighs at his failure

“Hardly, neither one of us posses the power to take the artifact from yours hands at this point. However I will still grant you your wish and send you to someone who is.” Kalen replies

	Kalen’s words elicited a smirk from the rakshasa, Haimish looked back to see the tiger man opening an empty kennel and motioning for Haimish to enter.

“Oh no, you’re not locking me up like some dog waiting for his beating, I’ll go down killing you if I have to.” Haimish objects

“No you won’t, you’ll never get rid of that thing if you do and any chance you had at humanity will wash away with the spilt blood. No, you’re going to be a good little boy and do exactly as you’re told.” Kalen responds

	Haimish stood defiantly against the wishes of the elder vampire, seconds turned to minutes, which turned to hours. The three of them at a standstill, into the four hour of waiting Haimish realized his stubbornness was going to get Kalen what he wanted anyway as the vampire would merely wait here until the sphere transformed him and then win by default. Haimish also knew there was no way he could defeat the duo in a fight, five hours after following the fake Kalen into this tunnel Haimish comprehended he had been checkmated once he entered the kennel. Resigned to his fate, Haimish took a deep breath and entered the offered cage. The rakshasa quickly closed and locked the cage behind the bard. Haimish found he didn’t mind the cage that much and the animals surrounding him left him alone for the most part.

“Excellent, now in a couple of hours I will be bringing Teaphestuant here to view my price catch. When he is properly distracted you will strike him down, you’ll only have one shot. Complete this assignment and I will assure you that the sphere will be removed.” Kalen offers

“Who is this Teaphestuant?” Haimish inquires

“He is the master of the School of Ancient Knowledge and has access to thousands of secrets you couldn’t even fathom.” Kalen explains

“Good god, you’re going to supplant him as master of the school! Don’t you think he’d have protections or contingencies in place?” Haimish exclaims

“I have spent fifteen hundred years earning his trust, from the menial to the grandiose I’ve let him realize how much I respect him and how much of nothing I would be without his guidance. I’ve squelched countless assassination attempts, discreetly buried unintended heirs, and financed millions of my own gold into worthless tracks of land to satisfy his idiosyncrasies.  Today however he will see just how much I’ve learned.” Kalen relates

“How do you expect me to kill him hunched over in this cell without the use of a weapon?” Haimish asks

“Your hands are now weapons and with the power the sphere can grant you, it’ll only take one well placed strike to end his life. I’ve already eliminated his clones, his contingency will lead him to only one remaining body and I’ve already specially prepared it for his arrival.” Kalen explains

	Haimish spent the next two hours after his captors left opening his mind to the sphere. The blackest orb showed him countless ways to terminate a humanoid, where and just how deep to strike; the sphere brought him into a quasi-reality where Haimish could feel the warm blood run down his arm. Retracting his hand from the back of a man, Haimish found his fingernails hardened and lengthened into talons, their hard pointed shapes dripping with blood and tissue. Haimish rubbed the dark liquid over his fingertips, smelled the highly metallic substance, and finally placed it in his mouth. The last act shifted his senses back to the here and now as he heard voices approaching. Kalen was returning with the high mage and soon Haimish would have to perform his dance of death.

“Well, well looks like you’ve already had dinner.” The mage spoke looking down at something in front of Haimish

	Glancing down Haimish spied the glistening off his fingers first, and then the smell of blood reached his nose, followed by the taste of iron in his mouth.  Then the body came into focus, small like that of a child’s, horror of his deed filled his mind, he tried to retch but his body clung to the small blood sampling like a treasured memory. Haimish feared the worst as his shaking hands reached out to lift the hair from the face of the kill, as the blood soaked facial hair was revealed Haimish dropped his investigation. He’d killed a gnome; at least it wasn’t a child after all. 

“Is that the sphere? Seems pathetic in his hands. How long before it finishes transforming him?” The mage asks

“I do not know, I can’t get close to the orb without it trying to absorb my essence, it requires the inspection of a live being before its secrets will be revealed. Hence my request to have you come at this late hour.” Kalen enlightens

“Yes, well let’s get started. I’ll need my scroll table and a better work space than this tunnel.” The mage demands

“Certainly, would you like a space on Croy or should we ship him back to the school?” Kalen inquires

	As the vampire walked past Teaphestuant he makes a point to stop for the mage’s eye contact for the reply. The mage ponders Kalen’s question as Haimish slowly reaches through the cage’s bars. The bard manages to get his right forearm out from between the bars. Kalen’s form shimmers in the light as the vampire shoves the mage backwards into Haimish’s cage.

“What deviltry is this! Kalen how dare you touch me!” The mage accuses

	Kalen’s form shifts to the rakshasa as Haimish’s hand grasps the mages flowing robe and holds it fast. Teaphestuant with a word activates a dozen protective measures, ioun stones fly above his head, magical auras erupt around his body, a magical staff appears in his hands and in one fell swipe the mage knocks Haimish’s hand from his robe. The rakshasa slices two curved daggers at the mage, but the magical protections of the mage hold strong. A new plan begins to form in Haimish’s head one where the mage wins and releases him from the artifact’s grip. 

“What have you done with Kalen?” The mage insinuates

	Haimish found the mage’s still present faith in Kalen silly considering the trap he walked into. Magical energies whirled around the mage and shredded the rakshasa, blood and bone splattered across the room, driving the cages animals into a frenzy. The smell of the rakshasa’s death reached Haimish’s nose and once again Haimish felt a supernatural force overtake him as the mage stood above the wreckage of the rakshasa’s body. The sphere showed him mentally how to breach the mage’s defenses. The mage turned to fix his eyes upon Haimish as the bard swung with his right fist encasing the sphere within it. The artifact meets the first of the mage’s defenses and disintegrates as if it never should have bothered. One after one the sphere erased the mage’s protections until Haimish’s arc brought the sphere against Teaphestuant’s body and the mage erupted in a collection of black maggots and fell to the floor where they wiggled and writhed. Some into the maw of caged animals, others into the cooling body of the dead rakshasa, still others squirmed their way across the floor.

	Haimish’s arm hurt and he found that it was locked in the outstretched position. The black sphere has transformed his hand into a rotting appendage of death, gangrenous and fetid his fingers refused to move from the sphere’s grasp. Kalen showed up moments later to admire the carnage, if he was saddened by the loss of the rakshasa, he did not show it outwardly. The vampire made his way to Haimish’s cell, crushing several maggots under his boot as he walked. 

“Excellent work Haimish, I shall uphold my end of the bargain.” Kalen stated and opened up a red colored gate in the middle of the tunnel. The vampire then hefted Haimish’s cage off its resting place and tossed it through the ravenous gate. 

	Haimish hurtled through spaced and crashed against the red black surface of a plain of basalt. An enormous mountain of bones eclipsed nearly the entire horizon to the right. If Haimish had any delusions of where he was, they were lost once he saw the wraith brigade on the backs of skeletal horses leaving the mountain of bone and making their way to Haimish’s position.


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## spacehulkster

Just a big bump.
When does the end come and the next generation begin?


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## Hairy Minotaur

The "end" it's coming but the new generation is already up:

http://www.enworld.org/forum/showthread.php?t=236479


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## Hairy Minotaur

*The Dark Crystal?*

Haimish turned from the undead cavalry and peered across a broken landscape dotted with festering pools of rot. Huge cysts erupting with decaying botflies cratered around several paths that all led to the same bone tower structure. Scanning the horizon in every direction Haimish realized that the tower was the center of this plane and regardless of which direction he chose, all paths led to the same fate. 

Despondent, Haimish sat and waited for the wraiths and their skeletal horses to reach his location. The bard watched the shifting faces of the creatures beneath their cowls, like a mirror in a dark room smearing the light from a flint strike. The tormented faces of the damned stared unblinkingly through decades of torture to revel in their new “bodies”. The lead horse pulled up alongside Haimish and threw up its indistinct hand to motion the others to stop as well.  

“My lord welcomes you into his care, I am to escort you to his presence where your transformation will be completed and you will join our ranks.” The wraith leader issues while extended his wispy hand to the bard.

Haimish reached out for the help up, but stopped as he saw his own hand come into view, purple and swollen with negative energy, the memory of pink flesh seemed far off as if in a dream from long ago. Accepting help from the wraith seemed natural and felt like the right thing to do. His body moved up with his hand towards the wraith’s and just before they met the bard’s mouth uttered a single word. 

In an instant Haimish was teleported some one hundred yards behind the undead retinue towards the bone tower. The undead leader reached out with its consciousness and located the live flesh of Haimish within seconds. The bard hefted himself up and the new weight on the ground called forth the spiny maggot-like botflies from their holes in the ground to investigate the new meal. 

Haimish _dimensioned doored _several more times until he reached the base of the bone tower. The cavalry still hot on his tail, the bard casts fly and shot up the side of the mountain looking for a way into the edifice. The bones of dozens of equine skeletons rattled in the decaying wind as they approached their prey with unearthly speed. Haimish realized by going up and not out from the tower he was helping the wraiths catch up to him. Ceasing his ascent, Haimish dropped onto the loose bones on the exterior of the tower. Hoping to find an entrance or least a nook within which to hide, not so much from the wraiths themselves, but from the feelings that he wanted and needed to be with the wraiths, his mind not yet ready to accept what his body had already done so. 

Haimish’s blackened hands began digging into the bones, several of which were splintered and shattered, others had been there so long they welcomed the chance to break when his hands grasped them. Sickly yellow pus oozed from cuts and punctures along Haimish’s arms, still he dug. The horses were getting faster now and the dark red of the sky seemed to hover over his body now as he worked feverishly to create a hole that continuously refilled itself. 

“Fortunately for you, I have all the time I need to wait you out as your will dissolves away to be eaten by my master. Your body no longer calls your mind master, and soon you’re your resolve will lock away your mind in an eternal cell from within. You too shall enjoy the visuals I will show you.” The wraith states

Haimish spat at the creature as the bones beneath him started to shift and let his body sink into the pile. Haimish had already discarded all of his fear and swore that whatever fate was waiting on the other side of these bones, that Menthos would make this sacrifice worthwhile. The black sphere released itself from Haimish’s grasp and rolled down the bone mountain only to be gobbled up by a large skull and pulled with the bones. Haimish looked back out at the wraiths to stare indignantly at them, however the looked of horror on their faces brought fear back into the heart of the bard.

********************************************************

“Wow.” Eeyore exclaims rapping on the interior walls of the crystal shard.

“Whatever made this has power beyond anything the beholder is going to throw at it.” Dahlgren says.

A soaked Adokul wrings out his robes after being saved from drowning by Dahlgren, the floor party met the ceiling group where the water drained off the underside of the crystal and they found a way in there. 

“I would like to meet the dwarf that carved this from a single rock!” Kourk exclaims  

“What makes you think this dwarven made and not drow made?” Aust asks

“It was mined, and not bought.” Kourk retorts

“Just because you find the practice of a labor fee necessary does not mean I do. My people quit fancy your degenerate race’s work on the stone with live in. Without your work one of us would have to build our own lavatories. So for that I thank you.” Aust responds

“I am happy to be of assistance to you, it feels good to know that our craftsmanship is recognized even in places far removed from regular dwarven foot traffic.” Kourk says proudly

“Doopa, think man with weird beard should build ogre lava story too.” Doopa remarks

“Hey Adokul, get up here and find me my money. I don’t want to be hanging around here any longer than I need to, this places has odd energies about it.” Dahlgren demands

Adokul nods and steps out in front of the party. The room they are in appears to be the trash dump as the floor is scored from a ramp to the north all the way to the hole in the floor. Several small debris items litter the floor including dried blood.

“Well, whatever lives here must be intelligent as it gets rid of its trash.” Menthos comments

“Doopa not throw out trash and Doopa is smart. So this not be Doopa brother, Doopa brother never throw out trash.” The barbarian enlightens the group

“Yes, I think you’re very right in that theory.” Adokul says to Menthos 

The party trudges up the slippery ramp and enters a small room with crystalline “windows” where the crystal is thin enough to give a distorted view of the outside cavern.

“Doopa, pound on this spot here for a moment and see if you can crack or break it.” Dahlgren asks

“Pfft. I already told you this is dwarven crafted, that window wouldn’t break if Gruumsh himself came down and looked at it.” Kourk replies

Doopa takes a couple of swings at the crystal but doesn’t manage to do any damage to it. The party moves on and through an archway and into a large hall with several side exits.

“Well, which way?” Dahlgren asks

“I think we should cross to the other side and continue to head up towards the center of the structure.” Adokul suggests

After crossing the first twenty feet and peering into the side exits, the party notices that the exits are dark, much darker than what they’ve seen from the rest of the crystal thus far. Dahlgren and Aust head over to check out the left room and after rummaging in there for several minutes they exit.

“Anything good in there?” Adokul asks

“We’re in deep. Mind flayers.” Dahlgren answers

“What?” Kourk replies

“These.” Dahlgren says and places the severed chin of a dead mind flayer over his own, rocking his head from side to side to give the tentacles motion.

“Fabulous.” Menthos states

“All I need now is a good purple skull cap and my disguise will be complete, I’ll look the part, and Adokul you can suck the joy right out of the room. It’ll be a smash hit.” Dahlgren responds


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