# The best I have to offer



## Stahn Li (Dec 19, 2003)

Stahn Li: The Best I have to offer.

Instead of posting a complete description of one of my campaigns I am going to start posting a collection of short exert from my various campaigns to appeal to the more short attention spanned readers. Lets Begin.

“Battle of the Gods” Atlanta 2000

Two adventurers Masherin and Ilithan recently teamed up with a pair an eccentric duo of rouges named Mervin and Ervin. There travels lead them to a brothel in a local town. As the adventurers try to gain information to aid them on there quest a group of mercenaries including a large Centaur burst through the entrance. The adventurers are clearly no match for these foes and must find a way to escape. They clamor up the stairs where they discuss there escape plains.

Ervin: Wait I know another way out.
Mervin: Another way out!, the only other way is through Ugatha’s room.
Ervin: Yes we can escape through there.
Mervin: I got a better idea, lets go through the front door, a get cut down quickly and painfully by that nice centaur over there. ( they party members are confused by the two rouges).
Ervin: your right Mervin that probably would be the best thing to do.
Masherin: Who is Ugatha.
Mervin: She’s the orc prostitute.....well she doesn’t really get much business.
Ervin: Ok then its decided...off to our deaths. (Heads towards front entrance)

After some debate the party decides to use exit in Ugatha’s room. The two rouges are the first to open the door, revealing a fat female orc wearing lacy clothes that reveal more than anyone would care to see.

Ervin: Oh lord, I’ve gone blind!
Mervin Oh lord, I haven’t gone blind..... I can see every detail in perfect clarity...ohh how I long for blindness. Damn this cursed ability to see, Ervin you lucky blind bastard.

Ugatha rises from her bed “customers, at last”
The party quickly makes there way towards the secret exit, Ervin in his blindness tripping over furniture. Mervin hands Ugatha a pocket full of gold.


Mervin: Here, that’s for the next person who comes through that door..umm show them a good time.

As the party escapes the here cries of horror coming from Agatha’s room. No one follows them down the tunnel. Mervin later feels guilty for what he did to those poor guys who were merely trying to kill him.


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