# Wild Stewardess Action! - And Madness Followed COMPLETE!



## barsoomcore

Okay, here's the Story Hour associated with the game I run for a bunch of friends, most of whom are Air Canada flight attendants. The group also included Mrs. Barsoom and a geography teacher. All women, all in their late twenties, early thirties, all smart and funny and more than ready for a little butt-kicking action.

The game was based on the setting described here 

These have been great game sessions and I can only hope my writing does them proud. As I always do, I've adapted freely from the source material, so large portions of this are made up, but the bulk of what happened is true-to-life.

As in my other story hours, no rules, no descriptions of dice rolls or anything like that. I like to read that stuff, but I can't write it. This is what you get. 

Hope you like it....

Oh, and should point out that this takes place on Barsoom, the same campaign world as my Barsoom Tales story hour. You may not see any crossover yet, but it's coming...

The entire run of the Story Hour to date is contained in the attached text files, for those who'd rather read it that way. I sure like comments, though, so feel free to add yours to the end of the thread! Oh and for some reason the attachments appear to be in more or less random order -- they're numbered in the order they're supposed to be read in, at least.

Thanks!


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## barsoomcore

"It must be spirits," intoned Li Fa. "Be wary."

The other women glanced at each other before turning to their elder comrade.

"Well, maybe, Fa," Tong Shan began, leaning her tall frame against a tree trunk, "But it sure just smells like somebody's cooking."

Fa's expression turned as dark as her robes.

"Explain the sounds."

The five women paused and listened. Muen Wei-Yong shrugged.

"Sounds like somebody singing, Fa. I mean, it COULD be spirits, sure, but..."

Hsia Lin Lin smiled brightly.

"I'll go check!"

Without another word the slender young woman turned and dashed off into the trees, quickly out of sight through the undergrowth. Her passage was silent and the other four remained standing at the side of the mountain road, listening to distant singing.

Shan frowned.

"If it IS spirits, Lin Lin's going to need help."

Fa put a hand on her friend's shoulder.

"We'll hear her if anything happens."

Shan nodded, but kept a hand on the hilt of her katana. She caught Wei-Yong's eye and made sure the other woman had an arrow nocked on her longbow. Mau Li, Wei-Yong's "pet" wolf, was nowhere to be seen, but Shan was confident the rangy creature was nearby and would give warning if anyone came near.

Zheng Ming-Wa muttered to herself, "Goddess protect us," a quick prayer that triggered immediate repetition from all her companions.

The singing drifting down through the trees was foreign, exotic to their ears. These mountains formed the western border of the Goddess' lands and so the idea that barbarians might be found here was not surprising, but none of them had heard anything quite like this haunting melody.

Somewhere up in these mountains, Jing Zhou ran for his life. They'd nearly caught up with the Jade Razor fanatic in the city of Pangdong, but he'd eluded the Angels there and continued to stay one step ahead of them. Without Wei-Yong's ability to follow the slightest trace, they would have lost the trail long ago. Ming-Wa especially looked forward to catching up with the criminal -- he was a top leader of the Jade Razors, a secret society dedicated to overthrowing the Goddess -- and there was nobody Ming-Wa hated more than enemies of the Goddess.

Taking advantage of their momentary rest on the road, Ming-Wa bowed her head and began to pray for guidance. Shan and Wei-Yong rolled their eyes at each other, then took up a wary guard as Mau Li growled once.

"It's me, silly!"

Lin Lin bounced onto the road and raced to the others, ever so slightly out of breath but grinning.

"Come on! It's an inn, there's singing and the food smells even better up close!"

They all looked to Fa to see the older woman's reaction.

"You didn't see any spirits?"

"Just barbarians. But they seem friendly enough, and the place looks like it's run by a Tianese. Come on. I'm hungry."

Shan's stomach rumbled noisily and she grinned at Lin Lin.

"I don't care if they ARE spirits. I'm as hungry as you. Come on, Fa, what's the worst that could happen?"

Fa raised her eyebrows and Shan's forehead furrowed as she applied herself to remembering.

"Okay, that was pretty bad. But it wasn't my fault. They had balloons."

*****

The inn rested a few yards back from the road, a ramshackle affair of bamboo slats, thatch roof and rickety railings around the verandah outside. Smoke curled from the stone chimney in the dusk air, rising slowly and steadily and revealing the stillness of the atmosphere. Wei-Yong, Mau Li padding silently at her side, frowned as they approached.

"Not enough birds."

"I can hear birds."

"Yeah, but there should be more."

Lin Lin nodded, trying to be serious. "Yeah. Okay. More birds."

Soon they were close enough that the music coming from within the roadhouse drowned out any number of birds. And the delicious smell of roasting meat was making even Ming-Wa's mouth water. As a group they strode up the steps and threw open the doors.

The music did not stop upon their entrance. They found a wide common room, floored with rough planks, centered around a large firepit that fed into the chimney overhead. A crowd of barbarians sat at one end, weaving back and forth as they played their instruments or banged their fists on the low tables, keeping time with the young woman singing. Several turned their heads to inspect the new arrivals, a couple grinning at the sight of five women suddenly in their midst.

"Ah! Respectable guests! Beautiful ladies! Welcome, welcome!"

An elderly Tianese man bowed his way up to where they stood, grinning toothlessly. He gestured, keeping well clear of Mau Li.

"Please, sit down, and be welcome. All are welcome at Kam's. Please, please."

The five Angels (and the wolf) followed and sat at a table as old Kam indicated. Shan asked for wine and food and the old fellow tottered off, only to return in seconds with cups, a loaf of bread and skewers dripping with fat, fresh from the fire.

Long experience together had taught the women that being polite only meant Shan would eat everything herself, so for several minutes there was no talking while they satisfied a days' worth of hunger. As Ming-Wa was wiping her fingers on the hankerchief she always carried, somebody stepped between her and the fire. She looked up to find the barbarian woman staring down at them all. She held a throwing axe in either hand.

"Strangers. This is a peaceful place. If you have come seeking trouble, I promise you you will find it."

The five women watched in silence as the barbarian twirled her axes around her wrists, sending the sharp edges whirling in a deadly pattern of flashing steel.

Wei-Yong nudged Shan, "Show her yours, Shan. Yours is better."

The barbarian jumped back as Shan started to draw her sword, but Fa restrained her friend with a gesture. She turned to the visitor.

"We are servants of the Goddess, barbarian. We seek trouble only for her enemies."

Shan and Wei-Yong tore off chunks of bread and held them at the ready.

The woman eyed the Angels suspiciously, but nodded.

"I have heard of your Goddess. We are not her enemies."

Ming-Wa tried to begin a sermon, but choked as Shan and Wei-Yong stuffed the bread chunks into her open mouth.

The barbarian woman sat down.

"I am Haan Shi. Perhaps you are seeking the stranger who came here two days ago?"

Fa nodded. Everybody ignored Ming-Wa's half-verbalized comments as she tried to swallow the bread. Haan Shi studied the group, then nodded, some decision made.

"We didn't see him, but Kam told us about him. Perhaps it was he who denied me my betrothed. Chow Siu-Keung was to come and meet me here last night so that we could be married in the manner of my people. He did not come, and so I sing here, hoping he will come to me."

Wei-Yong scribbled a couple of notes and waved the elderly innkeeper over. Several of the barbarian men were trying to catch the eyes of the Angels. Lin Lin smiled at everyone, while Shan sized them up like a breeder looking over the latest batch of puppies.

Kam nodded as he joined the conversation.

"That man... Yes, yes, he came here, two nights ago. He was strange. I did not like him, but I was afraid. He stayed overnight, upstairs. The next morning he went on -- the village is only a few more hours up the road. I was glad he left."

The old man's eyes lowered and his face seemed to sink in upon itself.

"Until I found Hsu Ki. She was wandering on the road, crying. She said, she said that everyone joined the stranger. They... tore down the statue... "

Ming-Wa touched his hand.

"What statue, sir?"

"The statue of the Goddess."

"Where is this Hsu Ki now?"

"Dead."

Fa stood up.

"I knew it. Spirits. Come on, let's take a look at this room he was in."

They had crossed perhaps half of the room and were between the firepit and the haphazard staircase to the second floor when both Wei-Yong and Lin Lin stopped in their tracks.

Bowstrings went taut outside then released.

Wei-Yong recognized the sound a split-second before Lin Lin did. She threw out an arm and slammed Ming-Wa to the ground, kicked over a table and dropped prone next to her startled friend. Arrowheads thudded into the tabletop.

Lin Lin flexed her legs and leapt straight up to snatch the bottom of one of the banners dangling from the rafters. She flipped herself up just as barbed shafts bulletted through the room, splintering the bamboo walls and buzzing angrily through the air.

Fa stood unmoving, not flinching even as one buzzed past her face, but Shan grunted and swore at the impact of an arrow breaking itself on her breastplate. She looked once to make sure Ming-Wa was safe, shoved Fa at the steps and ran for the doorway. Wei-yong leapt up and joined her friend. They threw open the doors and looked out at the torchlight yard.

Eight swords hissed out of eight sheaths. The tall bald man, bulging with muscles, gestured with both fists and his minions roared and charged the doorway.

Shan grinned.

"I thought we'd never have any fun up here."


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## Skade

The banter is great.  "Yeah. Okay. More birds."  Its pretty cool that you left the session in a cliffhanger.  How did the _flight attendants_ like that?


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## Desdichado

barsoomcore, I think you're trying to get a rep 'round here on the Story Hour boards.  

Here's a question; does this take place in Barsoom somewhere?  I'm not clear from reading the campaign description or the title of this thread.


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## der_kluge

*ahem* - pictures?


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## barsoomcore

Okay, I've been trying this for a while now, and the pics aren't showing up for me, but can anybody else see these?

Tong Shan






Hsia Lin Lin





Zheng Ming-Wa





Muen Wei-Yong





Li Fa





I know, not the sort of pictures you might have been hoping for...


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## barsoomcore

"Fools! Return the Codex at once! Bring it forth and we might not slaughter you where you stand!"

The big bald guy laughed as his minions neared the inn.

Although Shan and Wei-Yong tensed for the onslaught, neither drew a sword as their opponents charged. Shan frowned in disappointment as six of the eight approaching thugs veered off and crashed right through the loose bamboo walls to either side of the door. Slats bounced across the floor in a rattling fury as the attackers split up, swords waving, and drove for the other occupants of the inn.

Wei-Yong flipped an arrow out of her quiver and snapped up her bow, releasing the thin shaft without apparent effort or care. A sudden ringing cut through the general cacophony as the warrior's sword sprang from his hand, knocked away by her careless shot. The weapon sparkled as it spun through the air to land point-first in front of the bald man where he stood, glaring at the two women. The suddenly disarmed thug's glare lost a good deal of its fire and he froze for just a second.

Shan's frown turned into a gleeful smile as another swordsman charged her. She leaned back just enough to let his blade cut deep into the doorframe beside her face, and then her expression turned fierce enough to startle the man. He stood frozen, sword embedded in the doorframe, as she whipped her katana up and out in a back-handed cut that opened him up from his waist to his shoulder.

He sputtered and fell backwards as Shan flicked the blood of her weapon and smoothly resheathed it. The sword was back at her hip before he hit the mud in the yard.

She sneered.

Behind her, inside the inn, the swordsmen had met equally stiff resistance. Fa, standing at the top of the stairs, turned her imperious stare on the two charging for Ming-Wa. Inky tendrils of shadow oozed around her as she summouned the dark power that served her will, and the two men froze, their swords banging off the floorboards. Across the firepit, two others had run into the barbarians and the clash of steel told of an issue still in doubt.

Shan heard a familiar growl behind her and casually leaned away from Wei-Yong. The fellow her friend had disarmed turned his amazed stare from Wei-Yong to gape over Shan's shoulder. A split-second of terror and then he disappeared in a flash of grey fur as Mau Li cannoned into him, two hundred pounds of angry wolf digging in and holding on as he flew off the verandah, screaming.

Wei-Yong beamed.

"Good girl."

Fa called from inside.

"What's going on out there?"

Shan yelled back, "Bald guy wants his Codex."

"His what now?"

"Hang on, I'll check."

Shan nodded at the now-fuming bald man. "Hey. What's this Codex? Got any more friends?"

He stamped, throwing up a great splash of mud. Neither of them paid the slightest attention to Mau Li's ongoing mauling of the unfortunate thug off to the side.

"My mistress will tear you apart! She is not one to forgive easily and you will die deaths of agony as she tortures you. Return the Codex, thieves, if you wish to live."

Shan leaned back in through the door. "He won't tell me."

Four unarmed men, all bald, all impressively muscled (though not so much as to outshine their leader), stepped out from behind the big guy. They clenched their fists, then exploded in a sudden rush for the inn door.

Neither Shan nor Wei-Yong had time to react with anything other than pure unconscious reflex. Which in Wei-Yong's case meant she put an arrow in either eye of one of the new fellows, while Shan nearly cut another in half. The two surviving leapt right past the women at the door to land in front of the fire-pit. They both struck poses and opened their mouths to begin long, intimidating shrieks.

Shrieks that were unceremoniously cut off when Lin Lin let go of the banner and landed on their heads. Giggling.

The girl bounced to her feet, lashing out in a blinding kick, and a sudden flurry of fists and knees and shins and foreheads blurred back and forth between her and the two men, who managed to circle around and flank her. Lin Lin's eyes were nearly closed, an ecstatic grin on her face as she deflected one attack after another, weaving and ducking between her opponents.

Nearly everyone watching stood in fascination, watching the contest. Except for Shan, who heaved a sigh of boredom. She noticed that there were two of these guys, and only one Lin Lin, and after a bit of math decided that was one guy too many.

Shan couldn't accelerate too fast, but she had enough steps between where she stood at the door and where the fight was happening in front of the firepit that she could build up considerable momentum. Shan in motion was pretty nearly an irresistable force.

Two steps into her charge, Shan saw Lin Lin send one of her opponents flying into the firepit. She chuckled and poured on the speed, leaning forward and extending her arms.

Both Lin Lin and her remaining opponent noticed the onrush of muscle and armour. And both stepped back to let it by. Shan screeched to a halt on the very lip of the firepit, windmilling her arms like mad as she attempted to avoid a faceplant into hot coals.

Lin Lin grabbed a ridge on the back of her friend's armour and snap-kicked herself into the air, planting her left heel solidly under her opponent's chin. His head snapped back and he dropped to the boards without a sound as Shan stumbled back from the edge.

Wei-Yong leaned against the doorframe, keeping one eye on the now-enraged bald man watching his minions get dispatched with such ease.

Ming-Wa got to her feet and set about tying up the swordsmen Li Fa had immobilized. She looked up as the barbarian woman, her embroidered cloak flying, feathered turban flashing, stormed by to stand next to Wei-Yong at the door.

Haan Shi spat noisily and shook her fist at the bald man.

"Leave us in peace, smelly Tianese trash!"

Wei-Yong nodded in approval.

The bald man looked in danger of exploding from apoplectic rage. His face turned red as he shrieked, "The Jasmine Witch will not be denied! You will return the Codex at once or die!"

"Are you watching the same fight I'm watching?"

Wei-Yong looked on as Haan Shi yanked out her throwing axes and went through the same impressive routine she'd used before, spinning the hafted weapons around in a blur of steel before releasing both.

The axes whirled through the air, deadly and true.

And he caught them. Both.

Wei-Yong's eyes widened. She turned back just in time to see both axes hurtle back and plunge themselves into Haan Shi's torso. Knocked backwards by the impact, Haan Shi crashed to the floor and sat staring at the weapons embedded in her front. She gave a quiet groan and collapsed.

Two arrows flew from a single string before Wei-Yong had even consciously acknowledged the event. She seemed to turn to the bald man just as he weaved aside from the shafts.

"Mau Li! Take him down!"

The wolf looked up from the corpse she was still tearing at, followed Wei-Yong's gaze and hurled herself at the man standing there.

And crumpled up with a yelp as his fist connected with her skull.

Ming-Wa heard her friend's cry of anger, and looked up in time to see Shan and Lin Lin fly out the door as Wei-Yong unloaded a stream of arrows, her hands blurring between the quiver and the bowstring.

They had done this a million times before. Shan felt Wei-Yong's arrows buzzing past her head, and brandished her sword, yelling as she charged straight at her opponent. As she neared him, she felt a sudden press against her back, and grinned as Lin Lin leapt onto her shoulder and then tumbled up and over the startled bald man. She plowed into him swordfirst, and lost herself in the ever-thrilling dance of combat, peripherally aware of her friend on the other side, Wei-Yong's shots somehow finding clear space and nicking his arms and face, Lin Lin's shouts and giggles as she kicked and punched and spun like a crazed toy.

Shan wasn't precise like Wei-Yong and she wasn't fancy like Lin Lin. Her sword moved in simple, predictable arcs. Arcs cut with such power that her opponent was forced to retreat, stumbling back from blows so strong the sound of the blade cutting through the air was as loud as Lin Lin's yells. As he back-pedalled, he kept running afoul of Lin Lin, who nearly tripped him flat several times.

He broke free of them both and staggered back a few steps, real fear in his eyes.

"My mistress will boil you alive! You have incurred her wrath and you will pay!"

Wei-Yong lowered her bow, exasperated.

"Would you stop it? You're embarrassing yourself."

They all took a step back as he brandished what looked like a small black bead.

"You have not seen the last of me!"

He threw the bead to the ground and vanished as shadowy darkness coiled up from all around.

"Hey, we're not done with you!"

Inside, Ming-Wa and Fa tended Haan Shi, staunching her wounds while her cohorts looked on anxiously. They looked up as the other three came in, Shan carrying a still-dazed Mau Li. Wei-Yong glared at Fa and Ming-Wa.

"Do we know anything about this Codex? The Jasmine Witch? Who were those clowns?"

Ming-Wa nodded.

"The Jasmine Witch is a sorceress, an enemy of the Goddess. She's supposed to live around Pangdong but nobody's reported a reliable sighting. A Codex is a kind of book, usually magic, isn't that right, Fa?"

The older woman turned her head to look up at the second-floor rooms.

"I want to investigate the room Jing Zhou stayed in. Maybe _he_ took the Codex."

*****

Shan, Wei-Yong and Lin Lin stood in the doorway, watching their friends examine the ordinary-looking sleeping chamber. Fa and Ming-Wa moved silently, turning over cups and reaching under blankets as they sought clues to their quarry's activities.

Ming-Wa wrinkled her nose.

"Doesn't it kind of stink in here?"

Wei-Yong sighed.

"Yes, Ming-Wa, it's not like the Sanctuary where you grew up and everything was perfect and everybody has happy and wasn't it lovely and nice and pretty all the time and isn't it awful how you have to travel around in such grubby conditions, a nice educated girl like you?"

The two women glared at each other for a second. Ming-Wa narrowed her eyes.

"It smells, Wei-Yong, like the ocean. I'm surprised such an alert, outdoorsy type like you, a girl who can hear crickets from miles away, can count the lice in her hair without even looking, failed to notice that. Or maybe you forgot that the ocean is six hundred miles away from here? I know geography is so hard for you."

"Enough, you two." Fa gave each of them a dose of glare and they subsided. "I smell it as well. Ideas?"

Nobody spoke up.

"Ming-Wa, can you do a reading on an object here? One of these blankets?"

The petite woman nodded and knelt next to the blankets. She put her hands on the rough wool and whispered a prayer. Deep within her she felt the tugging of her power, like the notion she'd forgotten something but couldn't quite recall what it was. She relaxed as the familiar words of her prayer guided her into comfortable mental paths, and suddenly she could see him. Jing Zhou.

The Goddess was everything to Ming-Wa. She loved her enigmatic mistress with utter devotion and the thought of somebody rejecting such perfection filled her with loathing and fury, and she controlled her anger as the image of Jing Zhou solidified in her mind.

He opened a sack and took out a heavy, jewel-encrusted book that he laid open before him and began reading aloud from. The sounds that he uttered evaporated Ming-Wa's fury, replacing it with unknowing terror. They were animalistic noises, grunts and squeaks like no language she'd ever heard of, no sound she'd ever heard emitted by a human throat. Long rattling hisses that rose and dipped in an almost-melody of repulsive disharmony. As he continued, it seemed as if voices were joining him, a vast chorus of inhuman voices, distant but thunderous, filling the world with hunger and despair. Ming-Wa's vision faded and she collapsed, weeping uncontrollably, too terrified to speak.

Wei-Yong was first to her side and the group of women returned to downstairs to consider their options. Haan Shi, held upright by two of her companions, confronted them.

"Something terrible has happened. Chow Siu-Keung is in danger. I beg you to help him. Help us all."

The Angels looked at each other. Wei-Yong shrugged.

"Yeah, that's our job."


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## Yellow Sign

Gosh! You got my full attention now! 

Great Story. 

BTW - Who did the art work for the Angel's potraits?


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## barsoomcore

The portraits are from WotC's "PC Portraits" feature -- they did an Asian Adventurers theme by Todd Harris -- about whom I know nothing except I LOVE LOVE LOVE his style and he's done a bunch of stuff for Dragon. Google turns up almost nothing on him, so anybody with more info, clue me in!

Did I mention I LOVE his work?


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## ledded

Very nice story, I love it.  I'm always loving asian-themed stuff, and this does the genre well.  Good work.


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## barsoomcore

I just like making up the names and then saying them.

Hsia Lin Lin. Chow Siu-Keung. Li Fa.

It pleases me immensely.


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## barsoomcore

Two dogs tussled over something down an alley between houses that stood blank and empty, doors hanging open and windows unshuttered. Their growls echoed down the main street as the Angels walked five abreast into town.

Nobody came out to greet them. A shutter creaked back and forth in the fitful breeze. Emerging stalks of rice waved in the water-filled paddies that surrounded the village. High summer, yet nobody working the fields. Even Lin Lin was quiet. Only the ongoing growls from the dogs offered any sign of life.

Shan looked over in frustration.

"What are those beasts fighting over?"

Wei-Yong turned to look more closely.

Her knees thudded into the dust of the road and she convulsed, vomiting helplessly. The others rushed to assist her.

_A human head, its face torn in an expression of agony, hung suspended in the jaws of the larger dog as the other leapt and snapped, trying to yank the prize from its sibling._

Wei-Yong shook off offers of help.

"I'm okay. I just... I just saw something. Those dogs... "

She took a breath and got unsteadily to her feet.

"Something terrible has happened here."

She stared down the main street with murderous intent.

"Something terrible."

*****

They rounded the corner and stood looking across the main square, at the base of what had once been a statue of the Goddess. The statue itself lay in the dust to one side.

Ming-Wa cried out at the sight and ran for the fallen idol, flanked by Shan and Wei-Yong. Fa and Lin Lin turned at a sudden voice nearby.

"Welcome! Welcome to Wei Ming! Welcome!"

A little old lady waved at them from the shade of the teahouse, where two other figures sat motionless. Fa and Lin Lin shrugged at each other and headed towards her. She continued to smile and babble as they approached.

"A beautiful day. Welcome! Tea? Please, sit down. Welcome! Strangers are always welcome in Wei Ming. Welcome!"

As they neared the steps up to the shaded potico of the teahouse, Fa experienced a surge of dread. Those figures sitting at the table, as she watched them, her skin seemed to seethe with revulsion. She made a quick hand signal to Lin Lin to be watchful and smiled at the old lady.

"Thank you. It is a beautiful day, praise the Goddess. And may She smile on your town today."

At the mention of the Goddess, the two figures turned.

_"Your puny, stinking Goddess is nothing to us. Death is nothing to us. We will be free!"_

Lin Lin's eyes widened.

"I don't want any tea, thanks."

*****

Ming-Wa fell to her knees in front of the broken statue, imploring the Goddess for aid. Wei-Yong put a hand on her friend's shoulder and patted it awkwardly.

Though none of them possessed devotion quite as absolute as Ming-Wa's, all of the Angels were loyal servants of the Goddess and the sight of this desecration offended them deeply. Shan stared at the broken statue, a slow rage burning deep within her. She knelt and brushed dirt from a sacred face she'd known all her life, reverent and furious at the same time.

"Jing Zhou. That bastard."

Wei-Yong nodded.

"We'll find him. And we'll deal with him."

"We'll tear him apart!"

Ming-Wa spat in her anger.

"We'll take him all the way back to Zuyang and the Goddess herself will skin him alive!"

"Yeah. We'll get him."

*****

Fa and Lin Lin started to back out of the teahouse.

The figures before them rose up, eyeless sockets gaping. Blood smeared their faces and flies buzzed incessantly. The old lady sank to the floor, screaming in terror and curling into a ball.

Shan, Ming-Wa and Wei-Yong turned at the sudden burst of screaming. They took a step towards the teahouse and then froze as from the far side of the square emerged a row of shambling, hooded figures. The stink of rotting flesh rolled across the plaza.

Shan swore an imaginative oath that had something to do with the Goddess' tan lines. Ming-Wa had just enough presence of mind to look offended.

Fa looked over her shoulder, took in the line of figures staggering past, and tapped Lin Lin on the shoulder.

"These two are yours, sweetie. I'm going to deal with those ones."

Lin Lin nodded, drew both her sai and leapt at the two coming across the teahouse while Fa stepped outside and raised her arms. Meaty smacks behind her told of Lin Lin's efforts.

Black smoke seemed to swirl up around her, reaching outwards in a growing circle of darkness, sucking at any vegetation it could grasp, drying out the soil in the ground and the planks of the teahouse. As she always did, Fa experienced a moment of terror at the hungry power she commanded, but she bent her will and performed mammoth calculations in her head, the values and operations multiplying endlessly as she thought her way down coldly rational corridors, forcing her mind into the exact pattern that would trigger the energy of Shadow to alter reality in precisely the manner she sought.

Fa shuddered as the power leapt to her will and the ground exploded at her feet. The explosion raced away from her, dirt and soil flying upwards as though a gigantic, frenzied mole were burrowing at immense speed just beneath the surface, charging straight at the advancing figures and sending them flying in a noisy blast of sorcery.

Limbs, torsos, heads, boulders and lumps of soil tumbled back to the earth in the wake of Fa's spell, crashing down into the ruined plaza. Shan's sword flew back and forth as she dismembered a few that had escaped destruction, but Fa saw in horror that three had avoided both her spell and Shan's attention and ow advanced on Ming-Wa.

The young woman stepped back from the horrible creatures advancing on her, and then braced herself, raised one hand to her temple and extended the other out before her. She closed her eyes. The three figures before reached out, hissing, but then withdrew as a strange glow suffused the girl's slender form. The shimmering haze brightened, then lashed out, cutting the creatures into pieces.

Ming-Wa opened her eyes and straightened up as wet chunks hit the ground in front of her. She raised her eyes.

"Thank you, Goddess."

*****

Fa knelt and tried to comfort the screaming old woman.

"It's okay, Auntie. They're gone now. Tell us what happened here. Where is everybody? Where is Chow Siu-Keung?"

The woman's wild eyes unnerved Fa more than the undead creatures they had just fought. She stared about, unseeing, frantic.

"He made us... He made us _do_ that! He made us _eat_ that! My little boy! My little Gan won't play with me anymore! They're waiting in the fields for me! They're waiting!"

Wei-Yong turned away from the woman's desperate pleading. Steeling herself, she walked into the alley and squatted, watching a dog ten feet away. The dog cocked its head and then padded over to her, sniffed at her hand and started to lick.

_- What happened here?

Everything good.

- Good? Why good?

So much food.

- What food?

Flesh._

She reeled back as the dog growled and snapped at her, and hurried to join her friends. Shan looked a question and she shook her head.

"They're waiting in the fields? I don't like the sound of that."

The women surveyed what they could see of the rice paddies from where they stood. Wei-Yong's gaze seized on a farmhouse some distance from the village center, perched between water-filled paddies. She nudged Shan.

"Look. That one place. It's all boarded up."

Shan cracked her knuckles.

"Breaking down doors is always fun."

"That's my girl."

*****

"Back! Back, foul creatures! Back to the filth you came from!"

Shan scowled.

"I don't smell."

Lin Lin smiled.

"I don't think he's talking about you, Shan. He probably thinks you're one of those no-eyed zombie things."

Shan tried to work that out, but shook her head and thundered her shoulder into the door once again. The panel and its supporting planks gave way this time, and the big woman stumbled into a disorderly room, furniture overturned and broken and hiding behind a table at the back of the room, an old man waved a knife at her.

"Back! Back!"

He blinked.

"You have eyes."

"Pretty ones, I'm told."

The old man stumbled forward, the knife falling from his hands. He dropped to his knees.

"The Goddess herself has sent you to us! Save us!"

"Yeah, yeah. Where'd the stranger go? Jing Zhou? The bad guy, where is he?"

He lifted a shaky arm and pointed up into the hills overlooking the town.

"He has defiled the holy resting places of our ancestors. He has made a mockery of our homes and our faith. Even now he blasphemes their caverns. Help us! Drive him out!"

Ming-Wa turned to stare up into the hills, her expression cold.

"We'll drive him out, alright."


----------



## barsoomcore

That was an _earthbolt_ from Fa and _Sever The Tie_ from Ming-Wa, for those who want to know.


----------



## Skade

And finally, I read a story hour.    I want to read more of them, really I do, but its so hard to get into reading something on the screen, and turning it into a legible text doc is more work than I care for usually.  I'm glad I started in on this one right from the beginning.  

I'm loving it.  The scene with the dog was perfectly creepy, and the whole scene builds the horror aspect wonderfully.  Do the girls already know backstory on teh villain, or is that going to be revealed in game?


----------



## ledded

*Great* update.  Very creepy, I love the dogs.


----------



## barsoomcore

Skade said:
			
		

> Do the girls already know backstory on teh villain, or is that going to be revealed in game?



The girls don't know anything you don't know, at this point. Even less, actually, since you know the rules and they didn't even know THAT much.

There will be some but not huge amounts of backstory revelation. I'm a "don't explain, let them find out later" sort of DM.


----------



## Eyas

ledded said:
			
		

> *Great* update.  Very creepy, I love the dogs.




Yes, very good. I love the feel of the adventure.

Shame on you, ledded, for not telling me of this story 

I look forward to more.


----------



## ledded

Eyas said:
			
		

> Yes, very good. I love the feel of the adventure.
> 
> Shame on you, ledded, for not telling me of this story
> 
> I look forward to more.





Um... yeah, uh, Eyas, dude, there's this story hour, and it's pretty cool, and, um... yeah never mind


----------



## barsoomcore

Wei-Yong frowned. Beside her, Mau Li pricked up her ears and cocked her shaggy head up at her mistress.

"Does anybody else see that?"

Ming-Wa sighed.

"No, Wei-Yong, nobody else can count the feathers on a sparrow from two miles away. What is it?"

"Something flying."

"Flying? Perhaps it's a bird."

"It doesn't have wings."

"Then how is it flying?"

Wei-Yong looked away from the distant object to study her friend.

"I presume," she said carefully, "It involves magic."

Ming-Wa nodded.

"I see."

Stepping out of the cave, Fa shielded her eyes and looked where Wei-Yong had indicated.

"I can see it. Wei-Yong, you must be able to make out more details now. If you're done baiting Ming-Wa, perhaps you could tell us what it is?"

"Sorry, Fa."

The tall woman squinted into the sunshine.

"There's two people, sitting on something flat. I think one's a woman and the other is a man."

"The Jasmine Witch, I presume?"

Shan looked down the hillside, where thirty or forty more figures shambled slowly towards them. They'd come clawing out of the rice paddies as the women had made their way up the hill.

"Maybe she'll get tied up with them."

Fa nodded.

"Let's get down this shaft. Jing Zhou's got to be down there somewhere."

"Why not let this Jasmine Witch deal with him? That's got to be her Codex he's got."

Ming-Wa shook her head.

"No. Jing Zhou is ours. He has offended the Goddess and descrated her glory. It must be us who deliver justice. The Jasmine Witch works against the Goddess as well. If she gets in our way, we'll destroy her, too."

The other women looked around at each other. Nobody could find anything to say.

Finally Lin Lin grinned and squeaked, "So we're going down the hole? Great. I'll go first."

And with that she ran over to the circular hole that dropped away into darkness and jumped.

Head-first.

Shan, Fa, Wei-Yong and Ming-Wa used the ladder.

Lin Lin plunged downwards, and just caught a notion of the onrushing floor quickly enough to be able to curl up and roll out in a lightning pop-up to her feet, bouncing several times as she waited for her friends to climb down. The ground was hard-packed earth, and she wrinkled her nose at the briny salt-water smell.

"It smells like the ocean down here, too! Jing Zhou's gotta be down here somewhere!"

"Well," said Wei-Yong, her breath a little strained with the effort of lowering herself and the wolf draped around her neck, "If he is, I guess he knows we're coming, now."

Lin Lin shadow-boxed excitedly as her friends joined her.

"Good! You hear that, Jing Zhou? We're coming for you!"

Fa lit a candle she'd scrounged from the old man's house and held it up, shielding the guttering flame with her hand.

Around them stone walls, rough-hewn and covered in dust, stretched away on two sides, forming passages leading in opposite directions. Footsteps tramped through the dust in all directions, impossible to track, though Mau Li nosed about in an interested fashion. Fa shrugged and led them in one direction, away from the dim circle of light at the base of the shaft.

As the candle's light travelled down the meandering passage, Wei-Yong nocked an arrow to her bow and Shan kept one hand on her swordhilt. They both tensed as the rock walls came together before them, forming a small room that had once been a simple chapel to the Goddess.

Had been, but was now befouled. Ming-Wa cried out in shock and horror at the lewd scrawls on the walls, defacing what had once been humble depictions of the Goddess and Her goodness. Mau Li poked her nose towards the brownish smears and jerked back, growling. Heavy feet had ground incense sticks into the earth and kicked over the small idols, trodden offerings of rice cakes and pine fronds into the dirt.

After a quick look, Fa turned about and led them the other way. Nobody spoke.

Past the shaft they'd descended the tunnel began to rise in a slow series of irregular steps, layers of shale worn smooth by countless feet. The smell grew worse, like a tide pool too long in the sun, festering. Fa slowed as the narrow passage opened to the left, revealing a small alcove with a waist-high font that had once, presumably, distributed clean water for visitors to purify themselves with.

Now it was clogged with putrefying slime, limp drapes of green gleaming in the candle's glow. All the five women (and the one wolf) recoiled from the alcove and, except for the wolf, made warding gestures of the Goddess at the desecration. The stairs continued past the alcove and with a brief look round at the others, Fa continued on her way up.

"Put out the candle, Fa, there's light up ahead."

At Wei-Yong's careful instruction, Fa blew on the candle and they all stood silently as their eyes adjusted. Indeed, as Wei-Yong had stated, a faint glow came from up the stairs. Only barely enough to see by but as they climbed the light grew stronger and they stepped out of the rough passage into a finely-worked hall that opened into a hellish scene.

A corpse sprawled supine on a crude table, entrails strewn from the body. Other corpses splayed against the wall, held in place with iron spikes crushed through their limbs. The stink was horrific (Wei-Yong threw up again) and the images of blasphemy and foulness so unnerved the women that they could barely remain standing. Mau Li whimpered.

Ming-Wa, sobbing, turned away and found a small shrine, set up with dozens of tiny stone idols. Ancestor worship, she realised, but the idols were each defaced with a strange clay seal. Uttering a cry of disgust, Ming-Wa tore at the little stone statuettes, breaking the seals from them. Shan and Wei-Yong saw what she was doing and after a moment of comprehension, joined in.

Lin Lin stood unhappily, frowning. She rubbed at her hands and watched Li Fa go around the room, studying the desecrations and murmuring to herself.

The hall, besides opening into this chamber, also opened into two narrow hallways, both of which ended in heavy wooden doors. Lin Lin was watching Li Fa make her way around the chamber when one of the doors opened. She turned, alert and happy for a distraction.

The two rotting corpses that shuddered out the open doorway somehow carried none of the horror of those displayed in the chamber behind her. Lin Lin dropped low to the ground and spun backwards, extending one leg in a whirling kick that knocked both of the approaching figures to the stone floor. Her sai glittered in her hands as she slammed them downwards, breaking apart the half-decayed heads of her opponents. They stopped moving as Lin Lin checked herself for sprayed bits.

"Everything's okay! Don't worry."

Wei-Yong, now that the idols had been restored to their unsealed state, looked past her friend into the dark chamber beyond. Hundreds of figures pressed forward, hands reaching out, closing in on the doorway.

"I'm going to worry, all the same."


----------



## zenld

Sweet! 

This story rocks. Waiting not-so-patiently for more.

zen


----------



## tetsujin28

Best. Story. Hour. Ever. And it involves stewardesses. Can't get any better than that.


----------



## barsoomcore

tetsujin28 said:
			
		

> Best. Story. Hour. Ever. And it involves stewardesses. Can't get any better than that.



Congrats! You just got sigged.

Oh, and thanks!


----------



## barsoomcore

The door shuddered outwards against the shoulders of Wei-Yong and Lin Lin, seeming to groan with the effort.

Wei-Yong called out, "Little help, here." Neither she nor Lin Lin were especially strong, and they were slowly being driven back by the masses of bodies pressing against the other side of the door.

Shan, however, was especially strong. And she was especially big. And as she thundered forward and slammed her shoulder against the door, it splintered apart and she nearly stumbled through into the room beyond.

The room full of shambling corpses now shoving their way through the tatters of the door. The women yelled and pulled each other back, but there was no holding back the tide of undead. Shan swept her sword out and began laying about. Her katana sliced easily through the stinking, half-liquified flesh of her enemies and within seconds she was surrounded by flopping, dismembered limbs and torsos. Wei-Yong sent arrows buzzing past her friend's head to pierce the skulls of other corpses lumbering forward, while Lin Lin bounced back and forth in the hallway, reaching around either side of Shan to distract and deflect the attacks of the walking dead.

Shan couldn't hold them all back, however, and they slowly began to surround her. One grappled her leg and although she hacked off both arms, the hands stayed gripped to her thigh. Arms reached past the flashing edge of her blade to snatch and claw at her. Lin Lin tore herself free from another, crying out in disgust. The battle backed down the hallway, new enemies shoving past mounds of bleeding, oozing body parts as they surged towards the Angels.

Wei-Yong looked over her shoulder to shout at Li Fa, "There's hundreds of them! What'll we do?"

Shan shrieked as teeth dug into her calf. Her sword whipped down and sprayed skull, skin and brains across both walls, but she was bleeding badly and now half-a-dozen of the things had gotten a hold of her and she toppled. She flailed madly, swearing at the top of her lungs and both Wei-Yong and Lin Lin plunged into the writhing mass of bodies to try and extricate their friend.

Shan spat blood; she'd bitten her tongue at some point. A filthy, slime-covered hand snatched at her face and to her terror she felt her sword yanked from her grasp. She started gasping, feeling panic bite deep into her mind, even as she heard her friends yelling for her. Another stab of pain as teeth, rotten and foul, pierced the skin near her waist, at a gap in her armour and she gave a violent heave, surging up against the weight of the bodies pressing down on her. With a tremendous effort and a vile oath about the Goddess' private parts and how they might be used in unsavoury ways, Tong Shan got her feet under her and threw back the undead horrors that had covered her.

Suddenly clear, facing the stumbling, rotting corpses, Shan let loose with her temper. She screamed and stomped her feet and shook her fists, slamming them into first one wall of the hallway and then the other, screaming at the top of her lungs.

Even the mindless undead seemed to pause.

Shan started swearing.

Shan wasn't the wittiest of the women. She wasn't the most sparkling conversationalist. Her brain didn't normally provide her with a surplus of choice comments or snappy retorts.

But she could swear like nobody else. Longshoremen, mountain bandits and heartless pimps covered their ears when Shan got going, embarrassed and shocked and offended. The foulness that came out of Shan's mouth when she got riled up was enough to whiten anyone's hair.

And she was plenty riled up. The curses she'd tossed about earlier were nothing compared to the stream of obscenity that she now unleashed. Ming-Wa did in fact cover her ears, unable to listen to her friend's shrieking blasphemies. She also closed her eyes, in case the Goddess decided that even a loyal servant like Tong Shan could only go so far.

Imprecations, oaths and vile descriptions of decidedly un-Goddess-like acts swirled around the hallway in a kind of rapid-fire chain of verbal explosions as Shan stormed at the undead, snatched up her sword and began laying into them all over again. With each blow her voice jumped up another level of volume and eventually, Wei-Yong couldn't take any more.

She started to giggle. Then she started to laugh outright, and by the time she'd run forward and grabbed Shan to start dragging her friend back from the crowds of undead now surging forward again, she was nearly helpless with laughter.

Li Fa ignored all the fuss, both the swearing and now the giggle attack. She made her way down the opposite hallway, ensuring a safe distance between herself and the others, as she reached into the Shadow Realm and began focussing her mind. She signalled to Ming-Wa.

"Clear some space around the girls."

Ming-Wa, still recovering from Shan's horrible curses, nodded and put a hand to her temple. Purple light scythed out from her, shattering the undead corpses nearest Shan and Wei-Yong, who stumbled back, away from their enemies.

Fa reached out and ran her mind through complex calculations, as she did so feeling the surge of the Shadow Realm's dark energy shaping itself, following the patterns generated in her mind. Her concentration was absolute as her mind flew through one long mathematical process after another, exultation rising as she dimly perceived the flow of the energy in the wake of her thoughts, and as she reached the end of the process she felt that darkness roar through her, shaped and directed, and her eyes flew open and she watched in quiet triumph as the hallway and the room beyond erupted in towering flames.

Corpses winked into ash and flew apart in the roar of the sorcerous fire. Wei-Yong and Shan fell backwards as they shielded their faces from the intense heat.

The flames continued to burn with no sign of any fuel. The women assembled around Li Fa, watched the flames dance for a while, then turned to face the other door. Shan shrugged.

"Can't be any worse."

Fa regarded her burly friend with some coldness.

"Are you feeling better after your little tantrum?"

Wei-Yong snickered and Lin Lin hid a grin as Shan, recalling some of the things she'd said in the flash of her anger, blushed and looked down. She nudged Ming-Wa.

"Sorry. Just got a little... carried away, you know."

Ming-Wa smiled. It wasn't the most genuine smile ever, but it was a smile. 

"Don't apologize to me. Apologize to Her."

"Right. Goddess, forgive me."

Shan made a quick gesture of faith and shouldered past the others to study the door.

"So we're going through, right?"

Fa nodded. 

"Jing Zhou's down here somewhere. Ming-Wa, could you check upstairs? See what's happening with our visitors?"

Ming-Wa nodded and closed her eyes. Within seconds she'd opened them again.

"There's some kind of battle going on up in the cave where we were. I guess that Jasmine Witch woman DID run into the zombies."

Wei-Yong shrugged.

"Hopefully they'll slow her down some. Let's open this door."


----------



## tetsujin28

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Congrats! You just got sigged.
> 
> Oh, and thanks!



I've been sigged! Seriously, this is so much fun, it's almost not even worth running my own game. Afterall, I don't have stewardesses, let alone one named Shirley-Pierre.


----------



## barsoomcore

"Are you sure you're up for this, Shan? Maybe somebody else should open the door."

Shan turned back to grin at Ming-Wa.

"It's just flesh wounds, sweetie. I'm fine."

The burly woman heaved with both hands and tore open the door.

Beyond, the torches in the hallway cast enough light to reveal a row of low structures, like tiny houses, each coming up to Shan's waist. There were six of the odd little constructions, in a row down the length of the room, beyond which Shan could just make out another door.

"Any ideas?"

Fa nodded.

"They're tombs. Probably the original founding families of the village. There should be no threat here."

Shan smiled and headed down the room, followed by the others. They all came to a sudden halt as shadowy figures rose up out of the tombs to loom menacingly in the darkness.

"Um, Fa? No threat?"

"Don't worry. They won't hurt us."

"Because..."

"Because we cleaned up those idols back in the chapel."

"Hey, that's right!"

Ming-Wa kept muttering prayers to the Goddess as the figures wavered and drifted in the air above them. Shan just shrugged and continued on, waiting to see if the spectres would attack, but they did nothing as she approached the far door. The others followed her, all pressed together as they tried to stay as far from the hovering figures as possible. Shan edged the door open and slipped through, and all the others followed quickly, except for Ming-Wa. The devout young woman bowed to the shades as she stood at the door and whispered, "May the Goddess avenge you."

"Okay, so now where do we go?"

They had passed through the door to emerge in the middle of a short hallway. A heavy stone door stood at either end, and two more were equally spaced along the long wall opposite the door they'd entered by. Shan counted her friends, and then counted the doors, and then counted her friends again.

"Four of us and four doors. Let's each try one."

Fa shook her head.

"There's five of us, Shan."

Shan frowned and counted twice more, then brightened as she included herself. Ming-Wa sighed and shook her head.

"We should stick together. One door at a time."

Shan frowned.

"All at the same time. Come on, what's the worst that could happen? We find Jing Zhou, kick his skinny butt and get out of here before the Jasmine Witch catches up with us. One door each, come on. Don't be a baby."

"I'm not a baby!"

"Baby."

Ming-Wa roared in frustration as Wei-Yong once again fought giggles. The others trooped off to stand in front of individual doors, leaving one of the end doors for Ming-Wa. Fa stayed at the door to the ancestor tombs, keeping an eye on everyone. Ming-Wa stomped to the last door and turned around to call down the hall to Shan.

"If there's some big horrible monster behind this door and it squishes me while you're down there, I'm going to be very annoyed with you."

"You'll be an annoyed baby, you mean?"

Wei-Yong giggled again. Lin Lin bounced in front of her door, ready to yank on the handle. Shan set her feet solidly and put one hand on the handle of the door in front of her, holding her sword in the other. Ming-Wa rolled her eyes and yanked hard on the door handle facing her.

All four doors opened more or less simultaneously.

Shan recoiled from a room filled with torn and gnawed corpses, strange sigils scrawled on the walls.

Wei-Yong looked into an empty private chapel. Mau Li sniffed.

Lin Lin peered around a room identical to the one Wei-Yong looked into.

Ming-Wa faced a big horrible monster and it squished her. With a yell and a sickening crack, Ming-Wa flew backwards down the hall to crash into the flagstones not far from where Fa stood. Lin Lin was the closest to her door, and all the others froze at the horrified shriek their cheerful friend let out at the sight.

Inside the room a terrifying demon writhed and lurched, its insectile arms waving and a bizarre stinger swooping about on the end of a long, prehensile tail. Worst of all, on the end of a serpentine neck grinned the head of their quarry, Jing Zhou. The obscene monstrosity gibbered and howled as its claws pounded a heavy table on which lay a massive leather-bound book.

Lin Lin, her eyes round and her mouth hanging open, absent-mindedly ducked aside as one of the massive armoured limbs swung at her to crash into the doorframe.

Ming-Wa pushed herself up, dazed from the impact, and turned her head to watch Shan charge past.

"Now I'm an annoyed baby."

Lin Lin heard Shan bearing down from behind her and without thinking she step-stepped up the doorframe and catapulted herself into the room, somersaulting over the demon, tucking just enough to avoid another sweep of clawed arms, pulling out at the last possible second to land on one leg, kicking backward with the other, laughing hysterically as she dodged the stinger. Her fists, her knees, the edges of her feet, even her forehead transformed in to weapons as she began to beat rhythmically against the creature's hardened exoskeleton, doing no apparent good whatsoever. Across the room she saw the familiar bulk of her friend suddenly burst in and cheered as Shan plowed into the demon from the other side. There was a loud crack as her sword bounced off the armoured plates of the monster, followed immediately by a series of whining rings as Wei-Yong sent a flurry of arrows bursting into the room.

A great claw reached down and grabbed Shan around the waist and the woman hollered, hacking furiously with her blade. Lin Lin had gotten ahold of the monster's tail and clung desperately, trying to keep the glistening stinger from stabbing downwards. She could hear Fa  telling Ming-Wa to move, give her some room, and Lin Lin yelled: "Hurry it up, Fa! Whatever you're going to do, do it now!"

Shan felt claws dig into her flesh and she heard with amazement a set of popping sounds as the plates of her armour began to snap. She looked up, wild-eyed, just in time to see a backhand swipe send Lin Lin slamming into the far wall. Mau Li leapt into the room but got pinned to the floor by the monster's poison stinger. Wei-Yong screamed.

Fa drove all the sounds of bloodshed and her friends' suffering from her mind as she struggled to complete her spell. Everything drifted away, ceased to matter, as she followed the remorseless path of mathematics, the unstoppable logic of sorcery.

Lin Lin got to her feet, her right arm aflame with agony. She could see Shan, still trapped in the thing's claw, and poor Mau Li writhing on the floor. Wei-Yong seemed to move in slow motion as she fell to her knees next to her beloved wolf. Lin Lin swayed on her feet for a second, watching in horror as yet another arm swung down and plastered Wei-Yong across the back of her head. The lanky woman plowed into the floor, blood spraying from the wound, and Lin Lin screamed, drew both her sai, and leapt on top of the hideous monster. With a terrible cry she drove both pointed weapons into the thing's body.

Just as with a thunderous roar, massive chains suddenly burst from the ground on all sides, binding the creature to the floor. The air filled with rock dust and the frustrated screams of the monster. Jing Zhou's head bobbed around on the end of its long snake neck, gibbering and drooling. Lin Lin swung herself to one side as the poison stinger darted down at her, slamming her sai into the creature's carapace again and again.

She looked up and saw Ming-Wa, face bleeding and robes torn, standing in the doorway.

"Time for you to remember, Jing Zhou."

Ming-Wa was mad. She was mad at Shan, she was mad at Fa who'd shoved her away, but mostly she was mad at Jing Zhou. Her mind reached out and grabbed what was left of the fanatic's brain and drew from within it Jing Zhou's deepest, most painful memories. The unfortunate man (or rather, the demon he'd become) hissed in pain and writhed as Ming-Wa's rage burned into him, piling agony on agony. Trapped by the chains Fa had summouned, he shrieked as the three other women got shakily to their feet.

Shan's face, as she turned to the creature, was dark with fury. She saw Lin Lin dodging the stinger, she saw Wei-Yong weeping for her wolf, and she put both her hands on her katana and raised it high.

"Time for you to forget."

Shan's big shoulders flexed and she grunted with the effort of the blow as her sword cut straight through Jing Zhou's neck. Black fluid spewed from the wound as the body spasmed and twitched. The women all jumped back as the liquid hissed and melted anything it touched.

Including the book.

They all stood for a second, panting. Shan turned to Ming-Wa.

"You okay?"

Ming-Wa sniffed, turned and pushed past Fa to head back past the hovering spectres. Shan shrugged to the others and they all followed.

The floating forms remained where they were and made no attempt to stop the women. Still, it was creepy, and they hurried through, only to bump into Ming-Wa at the top of the stairs. She was looking down the rough passage back to where the shaft entered.

Standing down there was a tall woman in tight red robes, with her head shaved and holding a black staff in one hand. Next to her stood the tall bald man they'd fought outside the inn.

Shan was bleeding profusely. Wei-Yong had no more arrows left and was still shocked over the death of Mau Li. Lin Lin's arm was broken. Fa could barely stand upright after casting the last spell. Ming-Wa looked over her friends, and turned to the woman.

"You must be the Jasmine Witch."

The stranger nodded.

"I am seeking Jing Zhou and the Codex of the Watery Gate."

Ming-Wa drew in a long breath. Then she pointed down the hallway that led to the ancestor spirits.

"They're down that way."

Everyone held their breath.

The tall woman nodded.

"Thank you."

She and her minion brushed past and went through the door. Ming-Wa grinned at the sudden screams.

"Guess the ancestors don't approve of girls who dress immodestly."

*****

"Barbecue makes everything feel better."

Shan sighed as Kam spooned more roast meat onto her plate. Haan Shi, still mourning her beloved Chow Siu-Keung, sat with her bodyguards singing. The Angels sat together, savouring their survival.

Wei-Yong swallowed and looked around at the others. "Does anyone have the slightest idea what was going on up there?"

Fa nodded. "That book must have been some sort of spellbook. I've heard of spells of great power that transform the caster into a demon. Jing Zhou must have been raising an army."

"For what?"

Ming-Wa dabbed at one corner of her mouth before speaking.

"To attack the Goddess, obviously. Why else all the descration?"

Fa seemed less certain. "There are other powers in this world. It could have been powerful spirits seeking to eradicate her influence here..."

"There are no powers equal to the Goddess!"

"I didn't say equal to..."

"None!"

Shan smacked Ming-Wa.

"Let her finish. Baby."

"I'm not a baby."

"No, of course not."

"I'm not."

"I know. Hey, Wei-Yong, that tall guy's checking you out. Think these barbarians know how to dance?"


----------



## shilsen

Finished? FINISHED? What kind of crummy DM can't keep a bunch of stewardesses chained to a gaming table for at least a dozen session? (sniffs disdainfully)

Oh yeah - great story!


----------



## Greybar

Very nicely done.  Feels like a good, tightly-written 30-minute TV show right down to the chuckles at the end.  I have a great admiration for people able to write a good compact adventure - it's something I'd like to be able to do well.

kudos for you and the players, I hope you have them looking for more.

john


----------



## Desdichado

Great stuff, 'core!  Now, are you going to explain somewhat how this relates to the other Barsoom campaign we all know and love?


----------



## Lola

It's true! Barbecue _does_ make everything feel better!

Great writing, must have been a fun game. Are there any plans for you to run another game for them?


----------



## barsoomcore

There are plans for a return to Wild Stewardess action in January. I will of course be resurrecting this thread then to post the continuing adventures of serious Fa, devout Ming-Wa, strong Shan, sentimental Wei-Yong and crazy Lin Lin as they unfold.

How does it tie into the main Barsoom Tales Story Hour? Well, for now, that's my secret...


----------



## ledded

Lola said:
			
		

> It's true! Barbecue _does_ make everything feel better!




Ah, yes, but alas he also forgot the onion rings.

Great story barsoomcore.  Very entertaining.


----------



## barsoomcore

ledded said:
			
		

> Ah, yes, but alas he also forgot the onion rings.



 It's, like, _Tianese_ barbecue, okay? They don't got onion rings, they got... eggplant. And stuff. Sheesh.

Durn Southerners think they got it ALL tied up...


----------



## ledded

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> It's, like, _Tianese_ barbecue, okay? They don't got onion rings, they got... eggplant. And stuff. Sheesh.




Izzat, like, that Kansas City style Bar-B-que or sumthin'?   

Weeeeell, ah guess you could deep fry eggplant, though ah doubt it'd turn out quite the same.  That shore is a lotta egg though... might as well make omelets. 



> Durn Southerners think they got it ALL tied up...




Hey, we aint got it ALL tied up, and she weren't my cousin *either*, no matter whut that po-lice report sez.


----------



## tetsujin28

The end? The *end*? No more stewardesses for more than a *month*? I don't know if my brain can cope!

I have just one question: who is (was) Mau Yi? Is this the Angel Formerly Known as Jiang-Li?

And I want picks of the <Austin Powers voice> Sexy Stews</Austin Powers voice>, so that we can see what a really lucky bastard you are 

BTW, I'd be interested in knowing what rules variants you were using for sorcery and psionics.


----------



## tetsujin28

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> It's, like, _Tianese_ barbecue, okay? They don't got onion rings, they got... eggplant. And stuff.



And Cha Shu Bao!


----------



## barsoomcore

Mau Li was Wei-Yong's animal companion.

Unfortunately the Angel Formerly Known As Jiang-Li was, like, in Singapore on the game day. Next time out we may have an additional cast member.

The rules for the sorcery system are on the main Barsoom website, but you can grab them here.

They're notably unusable and tend to make sorcerers anti-social, psychotic freakazoids that everybody hates.

Fa is an exception, but give her time.

Psionics were taken straight from the book.

Next game I MAY change the rules -- I picked up Mutants and Masterminds and am considering morphing it into a wuxia-style game and kicking up the action level a notch next episode.

We'll see.


----------



## der_kluge

Hey, did someone mention Kansas City Barbecue?  Jack Stack  ships anywhere in the country!  Give the gift of pork ribs for Christmas this year.  

And Barsoom, where are those pictures, Bucko?


----------



## barsoomcore

ledded said:
			
		

> Izzat, like, that Kansas City style Bar-B-que or sumthin'?



Hey now! Them's fighting words.

I'll let you take it up with Tong Shan. Quite a patriot, she is. I'm sure she'd be willing to, em, _edumacate_ yourself about the proper respect due to Tianese cooking.

Maybe Willie's charming enough. Maybe he isn't.


----------



## Pierce

Good job, 'soom.  Apparently BBQ is a universal comfort food, but more importantly: what about the pie?  'Cause ya gotta have pie.


----------



## barsoomcore

die_kluge said:
			
		

> And Barsoom, where are those pictures, Bucko?



 What, did you miss them? First page of the thread, dude.

Sorry if that's not what you were hoping for.

Use your imagination, my friend.


----------



## tetsujin28

die_kluge said:
			
		

> Hey, did someone mention Kansas City Barbecue?  Jack Stack  ships anywhere in the country!  Give the gift of pork ribs for Christmas this year.



Unfortunately, that country would not be the United Kingdom :-(


----------



## tetsujin28

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> The rules for the sorcery system are on the main Barsoom website, but you can grab them here.
> 
> They're notably unusable and tend to make sorcerers anti-social, psychotic freakazoids that everybody hates.
> 
> Fa is an exception, but give her time.
> 
> Psionics were taken straight from the book.
> 
> Next game I MAY change the rules -- I picked up Mutants and Masterminds and am considering morphing it into a wuxia-style game and kicking up the action level a notch next episode.
> 
> We'll see.



Ah, so you've kind of taken a Dark Sun approach to things.

More action? Geez, I thought you had enough ;-) M&M is a beauty of a game, and well-suited to this kind of thing. My own personal pref would be BESM.


----------



## barsoomcore

tetsujin28 said:
			
		

> Unfortunately, that country would not be the United Kingdom :-(



 Did I ever mention I know a bunch of stewardesses -- they DO travel a lot...


----------



## tetsujin28

Hey, don't tempt me -- they're all in my age ballpark, too ;-)


----------



## barsoomcore

tetsujin28 said:
			
		

> Ah, so you've kind of taken a Dark Sun approach to things.



 Yeah, only Dark Sun was too easy so I made things even nastier.

One of the nice side-effects turned out to be that undead make the best sorcerers of all -- so anyone serious about magic use tends to tranform themselves into some form of undead horror as soon as they figure out how.


----------



## tetsujin28

So where are you, anyway? (I know, I know...Barsoom)


----------



## barsoomcore

tetsujin28 said:
			
		

> So where are you, anyway? (I know, I know...Barsoom)



 Beautiful downtown Vancouver, British Columbia. Outside my office window right now I can watch low clouds scrape along the peaks of the Coast Mountains.


----------



## tetsujin28

I love Vancouver! I'm from Oakland (right next to San Francisco), but right now I'm studying in beautiful Durham, UK.


----------



## barsoomcore

Ah, Dr. Kaneda's _Durham_ lab. I know it well...


----------



## Desdichado

Barsoom, that magic page, which I hadn't looked at in a long time, seems to have a formatting error of some kind.  I think you're missing a line break up at the beginning.


----------



## barsoomcore

Joshua Dyal said:
			
		

> Barsoom, that magic page, which I hadn't looked at in a long time, seems to have a formatting error of some kind.  I think you're missing a line break up at the beginning.



 ?

Some questions:

1. What browser/OS?
2. Do you see the navigation header ("B", "The World", "The Tale", "The People")?
3. Do you see the Dungeons and Dragons logo with the link to WotC?
4. Is the first line of text the header "Magic"?


----------



## barsoomcore

Oh and I'd just like to point out that a Story Hour that got completed on the FIRST PAGE is now on its third.

Talk ourselves into absurdity? Us?


----------



## tetsujin28

Huh. Looks ok to me.


----------



## tetsujin28

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Ah, Dr. Kaneda's _Durham_ lab. I know it well...



Have you been to Durham? It's loverly.


----------



## Desdichado

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> ?
> 
> Some questions:
> 
> 1. What browser/OS?
> 2. Do you see the navigation header ("B", "The World", "The Tale", "The People")?
> 3. Do you see the Dungeons and Dragons logo with the link to WotC?
> 4. Is the first line of text the header "Magic"?



1.  Both IE and Netscape 6.0 (? -- I think that's the version) in Windows 2000.
2.  In IE I do, not in Netscape.
3.  Yes, although I wasn't aware it was a link.  
4.  Yes, but there's no break between the D&D logo and the header, so the header just sticks out to the right of the logo in both browsers (and at at least two different resolutions -- 800 x 600 and 1024 x 768.


----------



## Desdichado

Sorry, turns out it's in Netscape 4.7 -- I didn't realize it was so old (I rarely use it.)  IE is 5 at work, 6 I believe at home.  In fact, the Netscape 4.7 page looks absolutely dreadful; lines in all the wrong places and all kinds of things.  Not that that concerns me personally, as I don't browse with that browser in real life.


----------



## barsoomcore

Hm. Interesting that N 4.7's css support is so bad.

However, I do notice that the D&D img has a leftover "align=left" tag that ought to be taken out -- that might be causing the weird header behaviour. Which I have just confirmed in IE Win. Mozilla Firebird looks okay.

I never test the site in anything other than what I use, and let my players catch errors in whatever THEY use, but the site is definitely not very robust in its browser support.

I'm lazy. Whaddya want?


----------



## ledded

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Beautiful downtown Vancouver, British Columbia. Outside my office window right now I can watch low clouds scrape along the peaks of the Coast Mountains.




I have to say, one of the coolest and most beautiful cities I've ever visited.  Gloomy at times, but all the flowers make up for the lack of sun


----------



## ledded

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Hey now! Them's fighting words.
> 
> I'll let you take it up with Tong Shan. Quite a patriot, she is. I'm sure she'd be willing to, em, _edumacate_ yourself about the proper respect due to Tianese cooking.
> 
> Maybe Willie's charming enough. Maybe he isn't.




Ah, yes, but either way he carries a really big gun...


----------



## barsoomcore

ledded said:
			
		

> Gloomy at times, but all the flowers make up for the lack of sun



 Or, as us Canucks say, "All those flowers make up for the lack of snow."


----------



## Len

ledded said:
			
		

> Ah, yes, but either way he carries a really big gun...



It's mostly aimed at his foot, though, isn't it?


----------



## tetsujin28

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Or, as us Canucks say, "All those flowers make up for the lack of snow."



Or as we here in Northern England say, "Oh, it's raining. Again."


----------



## Carnifex

tetsujin28 said:
			
		

> Or as we here in Northern England say, "Oh, it's raining. Again."




Welcome to England, tetsujin28


----------



## barsoomcore

Or as we say in Vancouver -- "It only rains in Vancouver once a year. From September to May."


----------



## Carnifex

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Or as we say in Vancouver -- "It only rains in Vancouver once a year. From September to May."




Wow, is that all? Sounds tropical compared to here


----------



## tetsujin28

Pretty much the same as San Francisco...but without all the homeless


----------



## Desdichado

Yeah, since when did San Fran become such a homeless Mecca, anyway?  And since when did such a harmless storyhour derail into such pointless drivel?


----------



## Lola

Joshua Dyal said:
			
		

> And since when did such a harmless storyhour derail into such pointless drivel?




*_waves hand wildly in air_*

Oooh, ooh, I know! I know! It was at the first mention of the word "Stewardesses!"

Do I get a cookie?


----------



## Len

Lola said:
			
		

> Do I get a cookie?



No, you get a little bag of salted peanuts.


----------



## barsoomcore

Seeing as how the word appears IN THE FIRST POST, I'm going to say, "No! No cookie! Bad poster!"

Pointless drivel indeed. Harrumph.


----------



## barsoomcore

Oh, and JD? Does that page look better now?


----------



## Lola

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Seeing as how the word appears IN THE FIRST POST, I'm going to say, "No! No cookie! Bad poster!"
> 
> Pointless drivel indeed. Harrumph.




Ooops, thought you didn't say it until after the first bit of the story. Didn't mean the story itself.   

*_makes puppy eyes_*

I sowwwy!


----------



## Desdichado

Why yes, yes it does.


----------



## ledded

Len said:
			
		

> It's mostly aimed at his foot, though, isn't it?




Well, I guess it depends on what kind of underwear he put on this morning...


----------



## barsoomcore

Well, we're just having a regular little hootenany in this here thread, ain't we just?

What this says to me, gang, is we all need to hook up sometime -- Gen Con next year? Huh?

Lola: kidding. Here, have a cookie.
JD: Bad web designer! If it's any consolation, I just checked out the site in IE Mac -- holy crap. It looks even worse. Oh, well.
Led: Hope you know I'm just following you from Story Hour to Story Hour from now on. After Medallions and Al-Qarin, you're my Story Hour guru, dude!

Gen Con 2004! I'll bring the cookies!


----------



## Carnifex

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Well, we're just having a regular little hootenany in this here thread, ain't we just?
> 
> What this says to me, gang, is we all need to hook up sometime -- Gen Con next year? Huh?
> 
> Lola: kidding. Here, have a cookie.
> JD: Bad web designer! If it's any consolation, I just checked out the site in IE Mac -- holy crap. It looks even worse. Oh, well.
> Led: Hope you know I'm just following you from Story Hour to Story Hour from now on. After Medallions and Al-Qarin, you're my Story Hour guru, dude!
> 
> Gen Con 2004! I'll bring the cookies!




Now if only I lived in America, I'd be able to go to all these Gencon thingys you have over there 

OTOH, at least it seems like Gencon UK will be making a comeback!


----------



## Desdichado

I'll be at GenCon this next summer.  Being only 4-5 hours away makes that inevitable.  Now if only I wasn't moving literally on the same weekend as GenCon last year...


----------



## tetsujin28

GenCon is always too expensive for me, coming from California :-(


----------



## Lola

GenCon... land of pick-up games and cookies...

*_sighs_*


----------



## Desdichado

Well, if I wanted to pick someone up, I wouldn't be playing games about it -- but I can be pretty direct...


----------



## Lola

Joshua Dyal said:
			
		

> Well, if I wanted to pick someone up, I wouldn't be playing games about it -- but I can be pretty direct...




All right, that's it, I'm getting the ...

...

Ok, who took the Hong stick without signing it out?


----------



## tetsujin28

There is a NEW SIGNING-OUT PROCEDURE for items in the ENWorld Library. In future, you should record all items taken out of the library in the appropriate Signing-Out Book provided by the Catalogue (not on the individual cards provided before). NB that there are _three_ Signing-Out Books: one each for Mundane Items (including alchemical, masterwork, and mighty), Magical Items (including psionic items), and Artifacts. On returning an item, simply cross out the entry.

It is important for the sake of other library users that the system is used honestly. You are reminded that, if the key to the inner room of the Library is signed out under your name, you are responsible for making sure that everyone else observes the rules as well.

-- tetsujin28
ENWorld Librarian


----------



## ledded

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> <snip>
> JD: Bad web designer! If it's any consolation, I just checked out the site in IE Mac -- holy crap. It looks even worse. Oh, well.
> Led: Hope you know I'm just following you from Story Hour to Story Hour from now on. After Medallions and Al-Qarin, you're my Story Hour guru, dude!




Well, I love a good story, which is one reason I follow you around from SH to SH   



> Gen Con 2004! I'll bring the cookies!




Never been to one, though it does sound like fun.

Oh, and BTW, 


> Lola: kidding. Here, have a cookie.




Here ya go Lola


----------



## tetsujin28

I wanna cookie.


----------



## zenld

"Story hour followers stage meeting at Gencon. Cookies abound."

Film at eleven.

zen

http://www.geocities.com/EnchantedForest/Cottage/7348/cookie.html
(can't find the song so the words will have to suffice.)


----------



## barsoomcore

zenld said:
			
		

> "Story hour followers stage meeting at Gencon. Cookies abound."



 "Attractive flight attendants mob meeting, claim only gamers can satisfy them."

My God. What have I done?


----------



## zenld

"Of Games, Cookies, and Flight Attendants"

"At Gencon today, a group of gamers were assualted by several flight attendants, all wearing Air Canada uniforms. Police were unable to get any accurate descriptions as all of the gamers in question were staring into space with looks of shock and adoration or crying, claiming they will never again see such beauty. The only clue as to the identity of the attendants seems to be a trail of cookie crumbs, presumed to come from an empty container of cookies found on the gaming table surrounded by miniatures. 

Any information on the whereabouts or identities of the perpetrators should be forwarded to either the police or the ENworld Enforcement Agency for the Protection of Gamers from Rabid Flight Attendants.

More information will be forthcoming as the story unfolds."

zen


----------



## ledded

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> "Attractive flight attendants mob meeting, claim only gamers can satisfy them."



Brrrrrr... did it just get colder in here?  Oh wait, that's right, hell just froze over.  Oooh look, by the window... flying pigs?


----------



## tetsujin28

Dude, you are the luckiest GM, ever.


----------



## nobodez

*wow*

And I thought the story was great, I didn't count on the 'tween chapter banter!

Oh, and I tend to follow people around story hours a lot. Heck, I started out with the Medalians (third time typing it) SH, and have now grown out from links in sigs to, what, i think five or six.

So, I guess I'll just have to subscibe and wait for the impending doom of flight attendent powered gaming action.

and yes, you can quote me on that. Please.


----------



## tetsujin28

Just a few questions. Were the Angels made up by you, or were they created by the players? And how much of the in-story banter actually occured? Because for beginning rpers, they sure had the tone down.


----------



## barsoomcore

I created the characters, based on those great images from the WotC website. In-game banter is perhaps 50% from them, 50% from me -- they were GREAT rp-ers, no question. Very into it, very much about staying in character all the time.

It was a blast. Next game, this month...


----------



## tetsujin28

What level were they?


----------



## barsoomcore

I think they were 10th level. I didn't bother to put stuff like class name and level on the character sheets -- just put the relevant bonuses and abilities. But yeah, 10th, I think. Wei-Yong's a ranger, Shan's a fighter, Ming-Wa's a psion, Lin Lin's a rogue/fighter and Fa's a scholar (custom Barsoom class for spellcasting).

On a tangent -- how come THIS Story Hour (which has been complete for months) is generating so much more traffic than my OTHER Story Hour (still getting updated regular-like)? I guess it's the stewardess thing. Sigh.


----------



## tetsujin28

I think for me it's that I got in on it when it first began, so I don't have to go through pages and pages to catch up on what's going on. Also, it's wu xia butt-kicking, a genre I love to pieces. And it has stewardesses.


----------



## tetsujin28

Hey, I thought we were going to get some more adventures. Bring on the sexy Stews!


----------



## barsoomcore

tetsujin28 said:
			
		

> Hey, I thought we were going to get some more adventures. Bring on the sexy Stews!



How timely. The next game is scheduled for February 7 -- if the ladies can organize their hectic schedules.

In the meantime, I've got this great OTHER story hour you could read...


----------



## Len

Cool!

[Edit] Bah! There are no stewardesses at all in that story hour.


----------



## barsoomcore

Len said:
			
		

> Cool!
> 
> [Edit] Bah! There are no stewardesses at all in that story hour.



Points for "Bah!"

Well done! We approve.

Actually, I didn't mention that both Lin Lin and Ming-Wa work on TianAir, usually on the domestic routes. They really have to juggle their schedules to fit in all the kung-fu action.


----------



## barsoomcore

*The Angels Race The Snake!*

"Aren't these mountain towns lovely?"

"I'm bored."

"The air is so clear, the streets are well-kept -- and just smell the flowers."

"Isn't anything EVER going to happen?"

"And look, shrines to the Goddess everywhere. Good, pious people. Full of reverence and happiness."

"When are we leaving?"

"I bet they have hymns every night."

"Fa, can I hit her?"

Shan stopped in her tracks and implored her friend for permission. The target of her ire, Ming-Wa, stopped as well and without a trace of fear confronted the much larger woman.

Around them the high mountain town of Hsiao-pei-ho rose in cheerful cleanliness. Spring still hovered in the crisp air, and the buildings had been cleaned since winter's grip faded, with bright new paint around the windows, fresh thatch on the roofs and smartly swept doorsills.

Li Fa studied her eternally-arguing companions. Tong Shan, a massive, broadshouldered woman with muscular arms crossed over her armour, stood glaring, feet planted solidly, jaw thrust out belligerently. A few steps down the cobblestone street stood Zheng Ming-Wa, slender and, next to Shan, tiny, but every bit as belligerent and determined. Li Fa turned to study the fourth member of their group, Muen Wei-Yong, a tall, lanky woman still wearing the travel-weary furs she'd worn all winter, one hand caressing the fluffy head of Dau Li, a ferocious wolf who'd joined her in the weeks they'd spent travelling north from Wei Ming. Dangling from her ears Wei-Yong wore shiny new gold hoops, brilliantly incongrous against her stained furs. She watched the spat between her friends with eyes sparkling in amusement. Fa sighed.

"No, Shan, of course you can't hit her. I'm sorry you're bored, but please, try to keep from taking it out on the rest of us. We won't be here long, I'm sure."

"I wish Lin Lin were here."

"The Goddess calls those she needs," answered Fa. The other three women all made an automatic gesture of obesiance, and muttered a short prayer under their breath.

Ming-Wa took a deep breath and tried to offer a little branch of friendship.

"Look, Shan, it's nice that we're in such a peaceful place. We don't have to fight ALL the time, you know. I'm sure we could have all sorts of fun that doesn't involve violence."

Shan narrowed her eyes as she tried to figure out if there was a subtle insult contained in Ming-Wa's words.

Wei-Yong leaned against a storefront and called out, "There can't be fights all the time, Shan."

A woman screamed nearby.

Shan's expression cleared immediately and she charged off down the street. Fa followed, leaving Ming-Wa and Wei-Yong looking at each other.

Wei-Yong shrugged.

"I've been wrong before."

*****

The four women passed down a steep hill and into a small marketplace that stood just within a town gate. Townsfolk were backing away from a struggle near the middle of the market, where six swordsmen threatened a single, unarmed woman. The swordsmen saw the Angels approach and four split off to confront them while the other two began dragging the woman away.

"Help me! Please! They'll kill me!"

Shan never did the talking. She just folded her arms and looked tough. Fa looked over the swordsmen.

"Let her go and explain yourselves."

One of the men spat.

"Buzz off. This doesn't concern you."

Ming-Wa had caught up and pointed at the sneering bravo. Her voice rose in a shrill cry.

"We are servants of the Goddess herself! All that passes is her concern, and therefore ours. Explain yourself at once, ruffian!"

Shan smiled at the sound of swords clearing their sheaths.

"I like this place better already."

Fa turned to her burly friend.

"Shan, stop them taking that woman away. We'll deal with these ones."

The ruffians frowned as Shan nodded at Fa, put her head down and charged. A swordblade bounced off her armour as she barrelled past the four men, knocking aside a market stall in her plow forward. Wood splintered and paper cartons of spring cherries tumbled to the ground. The two men holding the screaming woman only just realised what was heading their way before two hundred pounds of Tong Shan, armour, sword and assorted gear cannoned into one of them, sending him flying through stalls to crash onto hard cobblestones.

Shan laughed. The second man faced her, sword out, prepared to swing, and went down.

Under a mass of fur and snarling teeth as Dau Li leapt onto him and pinned him to the street. His screams rose high and desperate. Shan turned to the one she'd knocked flying, only to find the former captive sitting astride him, pinning him with a knife at his throat. Shan nodded her approval.

The four bravos who'd just been completely bypassed turned to the other women with angry expressions. Fa regarded them coolly.

"Walk away, boys. While you can."

The one who first raised his sword dropped it just as he hit the apex of his swing. A feathered shaft appeared to have sprouted from his wrist, and he cried out in shock and pain. Wei-Yong nocked another arrow and sent it through his shoulder. It passed straight through his body and came out the other side, and he sat down rather heavily.

Fa's expression wavered not one bit. She did nothing but stare at the fellow she'd previously addressed.

"Walk away."

One look at Wei-Yong's cool display of archery, another at Shan's joyous violence, another at the great wolf mauling his companion, a final look at Li Fa's steady gaze and he took her advice, adding only speed. He ran away.

Ming-Wa had two men facing her, and for a second she had to stumble backwards, away from powerful swings of sharp, if ill-kept, blades. She struggled for a chance to get clear, fending off their attacks with her wooden staff. Each blow rang in the crisp mountain air and her hands shook at every impact.

Wei-Yong spun and her longbow snapped, sending a shaft blasting into the skull of one of Ming-Wa's attackers. She was about to fire again when the fellow whose shoulder she'd pierced suddenly lunged up at her, tackling the tall woman and roaring in fury.

Shan looked back the way she'd come and saw Wei-Yong struggling with her injured attacked, and Ming-Wa still desperately blocking her remaining attacker. Li Fa couldn't use Shadow with innocent townsfolk so near, so her spells were useless to them. Shan shrugged.

"Don't worry, Ming-Wa, I'll save you!"

"I don't need your help!"

Shan paid no attention as she reversed her previous charge, now thundering across the market towards her friends. Her target saw her coming, unfortunately, and while Shan could build up a hefty amount of momentum, quick changes of direction were pretty much beyond her once she got going. The bravo stepped aside and Shan plowed right past him and into the surrounding townsfolk. Things got confused. People fell over. Shan swore.

Wei-Yong, struggling to free herself from the half-dead swordsman who'd grappled her, yelled in pain as he grabbed one of her new earrings.

Ming-Wa took a second from holding her opponent at bay to scold her.

"The Goddess disapproves of vanity, you know!"

"I'm trying to save your skinny butt, here!"

"I don't need your --ouch!"

At last Wei-Yong got to her feet again, bow in hand, to see Ming-Wa reeling back from a cut high on her left arm. Blood spattered her robes and the swordsman pressed in, seeking the final thrust to grant him victory.

Wei-Yong heard thunder and grinned, and in flash put an arrow to her bowstring and fired straight past Tong Shan's head, puncturing the unfortunate man's throat just as Tong Shan's sword flashed out and cut him in a upward arc from his right hip to his left shoulder. The big woman looked around for more opponents and her face displayed great disappointment at the realisation that the battle was over.

The foursome trooped over to where the former victim still held her former captor at knife's point.

Fa addressed her.

"What's going on here? Who are you?"

With a last kick at the man who'd been dragging her away only seconds before, the woman stood up. She wore merchant's robes in the colour of some house Fa didn't recognize, and seemed in her early twenties. She bowed.

"Thank you, strangers, for your timely aid. I should surely have been taken by these ruffians had you not intervened."

Shan snorted.

"Yeah, yeah. Who are you and why do they want you?"

"My name is Guang Ling and I work for Teng Bai Rui, one of the leading merchants here in Hsaio-pei-ho. I -- "

She broke off, staring at Wei-Yong, then recovered, shaking her head.

Ming-Wa nodded.

"They're pretty garish, aren't they?"

"They are not. They set off my eyes."

"They set off my stomach."

"That's enough."

"Sorry, Fa."

"Sorry, Fa."

The woman stared at the ground for a few seconds, obviously thinking up a storm. She lifted her head and addressed Li Fa.

"My master is threatened by a rival merchant, Fan Tian Jing. Fan hired these ruffians to kidnap me, Teng's master clerk. My master is in terrible danger, and I think..."

Her eyes slid to Wei-Yong again, who lifted a hand to her earrings uncertainly.

"... you might be able to help him. There's a warehouse on Paper Street he owns, across from the sign of the Cloudy Peak. If you will come there tonight, after sundown, I can tell you more. Please say you'll come."

The women looked at each other. Shan started to speak but Wei-Yong cut her off.

"Will there be more fighting?"

Confused the woman at first shook her head, then reconsidered.

"Fan is dangerous and my master is much afraid. If you will help us, there will almost certainly be danger."

Li Fa, Wei-Yong and Ming-Wa shrugged as Shan's face broke out in a grin.

"We'll come."


----------



## barsoomcore

Here we go again...

After having so much fun first time around, the ladies prevailed upon me to run another session with their high-kicking heroines. Lin Lin's player was less enthusiastic and has been written out of the storyline for now. A sad loss but that's life on Barsoom.

I ran them through a revision of the Dungeon module "Racing The Snake" -- altered so as to fight in Eastern Barsoom more straightforwardly.

As usual, we had a blast, the ladies proved once again what great players they are and tons of fun was had by all.

Hope you enjoy this latest installment.


----------



## Lola

Whee! They're back! 

Great update, I eagerly await more. I love the in-group sniping, it's so funny.


----------



## Darklone

Yihaa


----------



## ledded

*Yippee-Yahoo-Hurray!!!*

They're back!!!

_*scrambles off to find a seat*_


----------



## rbingham2000

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> After having so much fun first time around, the ladies prevailed upon me to run another session with their high-kicking heroines. Lin Lin's player was less enthusiastic and has been written out of the storyline for now. A sad loss but that's life on Barsoom.



Yeah, it's kinda sad to see Lin Lin go. She was one of my favorite characters in the first installment. I mean, what can I say? I like silly, whimsical, impulsive characters.

And she also provided perhaps the most memorable moment in that first episode -- witnessing her friends getting the living crap kicked out of them by the monstered-out Jing Zhou (the bad guy of the first episode) and going completely ballistic, ramming both her sai into him in the first attack that managed to hurt him.

She will be missed.


----------



## tetsujin28

Woot!


----------



## barsoomcore

"I still don't really understand why I'm here." Guang Ling, struggling gamely to keep her mount under contrl, looked back down the long slope they'd climbed since leaving Hsiao-pei-ho.

The mountain town lay far, far below them, a warm, cozy reminder of the cold, barren wilderness she was following four insane women into.

"Ever go fishing?" asked Wei-Yong, Dau Li padding alongside. The tall woman wore an uncharacteristically fashionable cloak lined with silk and looked uncomfortable with her hair done up in a complicated arrangement. Her earrings still dangled, however.

"No."

Wei-Yong exchanged a glance with Li Fa.

"Never mind, then. You're with us because Shan likes you."

"What?"

"Nothing."

Shan turned to frown at Wei-Yong, and asked, "Aren't YOU the bait?"

Wei-Yong glared.

"It's just coincidence. I'm not getting married."

"Speaking of fishing, I'm getting hungry."

"Shan, it's only been a few hours since breakfast."

"Exactly."

They'd been climbing steadily into the mountains north of Hsiao-pei-ho. Somewhere up ahead they expected to find Lang-xia-gu, a deep canyon that cut through the mountains and eventually (they were told) became an underground river that travelled beneath the city of Liao-chung.

Where Wei-Yong was getting married.

*****

_Last Night_

"Is this some kind of joke? Or sorcery?"

Ming-Wa looked back and forth between her friend, Muen Wei-Yong, and the young woman who'd just joined them. Guang Ling nodded.

"This is Tang Fei Liu, daughter of Merchant Tang. We fear she has been targetted by an assassin hired by Fan Tian Jing, and that the assassin will strike as she travels to her wedding in Liao-chung. This is why I asked you to help us."

Guang Ling gestured between the two women, who stared at each other curiously.

They could have been twin sisters, so close was the resemblance. Both tall and slender, with high cheekbones and broad shoulders. But where Wei-Yong stood in her travel-stained furs, hair peeking out untidly from under her fur cap, Fei Liu approached them with a formal gown draping behind her, hair coiffed elaborately and nails polished.

"Obviously, the resemblance is striking enough that I hope the assassin will pursue Miss Muen rather than Miss Tang. If we can make the assassin believe that you are escorting Miss Tang to Liao-chung, we can take her there by a less direct route. Once she is married to the powerful Xue family, Fan will never dare strike at her."

Ming-Wa considered the wealthy woman with evident disapproval, but looked over at Li Fa for her friend's opinion. Fa turned to Guang Ling.

"Who is this assassin?"

The clerk bit her lip and looked around. The women stood in a vast warehouse near the Mountain Gate of Hsiao-pei-ho, owned by Tang Bai Rui, Fei Liu's father. In a far corner labourers lowered sacks of rice from a towering pile, their figures dwarfed by the great beams and pillars the building was constructed from.

"His name is Maliss. I saw him. Once. He... He's a kind of... I mean, he's not... human. Exactly."

"A demon? A spirit?"

"He's half... snake."

Fa's expression did not change.

"We'll do it."

Miss Tang, who'd been standing motionless all this time, fell to her knees.

"Oh, thank you, Angels! You don't know how terrified I've been. Thank you, thank you, my father and I both thank you from the very corners of our hearts. May the Goddess bless you all."

"Oh, she will."

"She'd better."

"Shan!"

"Sorry, Ming-Wa. Sorry, Goddess."

*****

Shan's glower had been building all day. At the sight of the ruined fort, it deepened further.

"Is it lunch time now?"

Wei-Yong shook her head. She was watching down the trail behind them, plucking distractedly at her new robe. She slipped off her mount and shielded her eyes.

"I don't think so. Somebody's following us."

The glower disappeared in a bright, happy smile as Shan considered the possibility of a fight. She joined Wei-Yong and stared down the slope, unable to see any sign of whatever her keen-eyed friend had spotted.

"It's still weird seeing you all dressed up like that."

Meanwhile, Fa, Ming-Wa and Ling stood at the edge of a cliff that dropped several hundred feet into the cut that formed Lang-xia-gu, the canyon they meant to travel along. The wrecked fort had obviously once stood guard over a rope-and-counter-weight elevator that used to raise and lower loads along the cliff. The elevator platform hung twisted in the ropes and the counter-weights had crashed to the bottom of the cliff. Ming-Wa and Fa studied the situation.

Fa spoke first.

"Not too worn."

Ming-Wa answered.

"Should reach."

"Guy to the pillars, blocks look okay."

"Make sure to peg the running end before Shan takes hold."

They both nodded and Ming-Wa stepped out over the edge and plunged into the chasm. Guang Ling stifled an exclamation of horror and rushed to the edge to see the slender woman drifting downwards easily, gown a little ruffled by the wind but otherwise completely unperturbed. And evidently uninterested in the wooden ladder that descended alongside the elevator cables. Guang Ling, mystified, turned to Fa, who was engrossed in laying out lengths of cable. She straightened up as Shan asked a question.

"Why don't we just wait here and put an end to this whole thing right now?"

Fa sighed.

"Because, Shan, we can't kill them. Fan will know they've failed and will send another assassin, one who might be able to find the real Miss Tang. We have to keep this assassin chasing us for three days, so that Miss Tang has enough time to reach Liao-chung and the protection of the Xue family."

"Oh. That's boring."

"We're not actually doing this just to provide you with entertainment, you know. We're trying to help somebody."

"I'd be more helpful if I was less hungry."

Fa looked down at where Ming-Wa stood among the jumbled counterweights and organized Shan and Wei-Yong into threading the complex pulley system and lowered cables down to the their friend. Between the lot of them they got the machine operating again. Shan clambered down the long, unsteady ladder to where Ming-Wa rested beside the now-stable platform.

"Hop on, sweetie."

Shan started hauling on the ropes and watched the platform rise to the top. She tied off the rope to hold it in place and wiped her forehead, panting slightly with exertion. The platform was a good two hundred feet above her now, and she could see it swaying as her friends guided their mounts aboard. Fa leaned out and waved to her.

"Down we go."

The canyon floor was a pleasant, quiet place, out of the wind that had knifed through their robes up top. Loose shale lay in broken piles along either side of a well-marked path leading deeper into the mountains. Shan smiled as she hauled on the cable.

Far above, the four women stood together on the swaying wooden platform and watched the top of the cliff recede above them as Shan worked the cables. Pulleys creaked and beams groaned with the strain as they slowly descended.

"Shan, go faster."

The big woman grumbled at Wei-Yong's insistence.

"You think you can do this, you go right ahead, you -- "

"I'm serious. I think that's a dragon."

Fa frowned.

"There's no such thing as -- "

"Okay," Wei-Yong interrupted, peering upwards, "It's not a dragon. It's just a big lizardy flying thing with teeth and claws coming straight at us."

She grabbed for her bow. Guang Ling leapt at her, sending the platform tilting unsteadily.

"Don't! Miss Tang can't use a bow! They'll know it's not her."

"Oh, this is just great."

They could all see the creature now, spiralling down into the canyon above them. Its scales glittered like burnished bronze and a long tail undulated behind it. It flew the way a snake swims, with long twists of its body, hanging in the air without wings or any evident means of support. They watched it come. Shan kept hauling on the rope.

Li Fa looked around. She could draw on the power of the Shadow Realm to fight this creature, but doing so allowed the life-sapping energies of that dark place to infect those around her. She didn't have enough room to make use of her power without putting her friends in danger.

"Ming-Wa, this one's all yours."

"Defend us, Goddess."

Ming-Wa braced herself and threw back her hair, then reached out towards the approaching beast. A vague purple glow built up around her, and as Li Fa watched, the woman's small hands clutched at nothingness and her normally serene face twisted in sudden agony. Her eyes snapped open.

The dragon shrieked, twisted in on itself and plunged downward. Straight towards Tong Shan. Who was grinning.

"Dragons are good eating, I bet."

Her grin broadened as the thing seemed to recover and charged straight at her.

"Don't let go of the rope, Shan or we'll fall."

"Right. Good. Excellent. Hang on."


----------



## ledded

Oh man, I am so lovin' this Story Hour.  Good update, very good.


----------



## PallidPatience

Noooo! Arrrrgh! GRRR! 

I hate cliffhangers.   

Absolutely love it! This thing is beautiful!


----------



## barsoomcore

"This on an empty stomach."

Shan tied off the cable she'd been hauling on and yanked out her sword just as the plunging dragon reached her.

There was a reptilian shriek, a loud curse and a sharp bang. Wei-Yong leaned over the edge of the teetering elevator platform to see what had happened.

"Shan? Shan, are you okay?"

The dragon sped along the canyon floor and rose up, climbing up through the still air a few hundred yards from the elevator where Wei-Yong, Li Fa, Ming-Wa and Guang Li kept their balance.

"Oh, yeah, I'm great. I think I got him. Tough bugger."

Shan got to her feet and waved her sword over her head.

"Come on back! We'll put you on the barbecue, lizard!"

Ming-Wa winced as the dragon, metallic scales gleaming as it rose high enough to catch the afternoon sun, turned abruptly and dove back towards them, screeching as it came.

"Hey, Shan? Quit inviting it back, okay?"

"Don't worry, I'm on my way."

Tong Shan leapt for the rickety ladder that rose next to the elevator scaffold and began climbing with quick motions. Even in her armour, Shan's powerful arms and legs drove her upward speedily. She watched over her shoulder as the beast came swooping down again.

"Climb faster, Shan."

Li Fa brandished her staff, hoping that Ming-Wa would be able to hit it again with her powerful telepathic abilities. She heard the younger woman whispering a prayer to the Goddess, felt that strange electric shiver pass through her as Ming-Wa's power manifested itself.

Again the dragon shrieked and turned in on itself, writhing in the air as it coiled and uncoiled like an earthworm poked with a stick. It did not fall this time, however, and Fa could see the creature regaining control over itself. In a second it would be upon them.

Shan reached the level of the elevator platform, eighty feet above the canyon floor. The wooden platform hung swaying from massive cables, its nearest edge more than two arm-spans away. Shan flexed her legs and took a deep breath and with an explosive yell, hurled herself across the gap.

Wei-Yong saw her friend preparing to jump and realised the distance Shan was trying to cross. It was too far. Far, far too far.

"Shan, no! Don't -- "

Wei-Yong cried out in horror as her friend sprang from the ladder and stretched out with her big hands.

And missed.

And dropped out of sight. Eighty feet above the ground.

"This one's going to hurt."

*****

Back along the trail the Angels had followed on their way up to the entrance to the canyon Lang-xia-gu, a strangely sinuous figure lounged in the shadow of six tall birch trees.

Maliss spent every waking moment he could tending to his longbow. It was a gorgeous weapon, filigreed and polished so that it gleamed even in starlight. It had been made for him long, long ago, by a crazed sorcerer with a talent for pain. He called it Nervewrack. Those unlucky enough to receive an arrow from Nervewrack usually collapsed in agony -- if the arrow hadn't killed them outright, of course.

He and the Caedmonish mercenaries he'd gathered for this mission waited the report of success from their lead party. Expecting a quick report of success, they began to worry as time dragged on. Maliss gestured to Burogerk.

"Go see what's happened. Where's Alrughf?"

The big barbarian nodded and slipped quietly up the hill. Maliss moved to where he could see the slope more clearly and blinked in surprise as Alrughf, usually a cautious type, came pelting downhill in obvious panic. Burogerk met him and the two returned to the grove where Maliss waited.

"Well? Where's Gurken?"

Alrughf shook his head, panting with the exertion of the run.

"Dead. Gurken's dead."

Maliss frowned.

"What happened? Did the spell fail?"

"No, sir. The spell worked fine. You saw him, he turned into a dragon. That was no problem. It's these girls. They can do things. They're... I don't know what they are."

"What do you mean?"

"At least one of them, sir, possesses powers... Like the Hinsuan Mystics. Powers of the Dream Worlds, sir, like yourself."

Alrughf thankfully drank a long swallow from Burogerk's waterskin. After a gasp, he continued.

"As Gurken approached they caused him to experience pain. Twice he came at them, and twice he was paralysed with pain. I heard him screaming. I felt the power unleash itself."

"They have a psion among them. Good to know this now. How did Gurken die?"

"I saw his body ripple with some kind of crashing, invisible blow. He screamed again and plunged into the canyon. One of them, the girl we seek, saw me and I ran."

"What did she do during the battle?"

"Nothing, sir. She screamed. She tried to catch the woman who fell."

"A woman fell? Is one of them dead?"

"I don't know, sir. I only saw one of them, the big one with the sword, try to jump and miss and fall. It was very high up. She's got to be dead."

*****

"I've got to be dead."

"You're not dead," Shan heard Li Fa tell her, "You're just... not well."

"Carry me."

"Shan, all four of us couldn't carry you. Can you stand?"

The big woman groaned. Her fall had been a crazy series of bounces and uncontrolled skids down the crumbling cliff face, crashing into guy cables and thumping painfully off beams and supports to finally end up face down on the loose shale of the canyon floor.

Not more than a few steps from where she lay, the dragon sprawled in a similar posture, unmoving. Though much more solidly embedded in the ground. Seeing it there gave Shan a burst of energy and she pushed herself upright. She pulled her big two-handed sword out of the sheath on her back, took a wobbly step towards the dead beast and with a terrible shriek, cut off its head.

Li Fa nodded her approval and dragged the head over to the elevator platform. With a grunt, she heaved the reptilian thing onto the platform. It landed with a splat that made Shan grin.

"Barbecue."


----------



## tetsujin28

Yay! My favourite Angels are back! Since I have no time for gaming right now (exams, *ugh*), this is as close as it gets, for me.


----------



## ledded

Yay!  Barbeque!


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## tetsujin28

Creepy man-transformed-into-lizard BBQ! Now _that's_ good eatin'!


----------



## barsoomcore

"Wei-Yong, what do you think? Can we get past them?"

"Sure, as long as Shan doesn't try to barbecue any of them."

"Mm, barbecued raptor. Hey, is anyone else hungry?"

Li Fa gritted her teeth as she considered their options. Their mounts grew more and more skittish as the big predators closed in on both sides. Wei-Yong held her bow down by one side. She refrained from lifting it, still worried about unseen watchers who might notice that the daughter of the upper-class merchant she was supposed to be looked awfully practiced with a hunting bow. Ming-Wa groaned.

"I don't know how helpful I can be, Fa. I'm pretty worn out."

The battle against the dragon had cost Ming-Wa dearly. The slender woman clung to her saddle horn to keep herself upright. Fa looked forward.

They'd followed the dry canyon floor from the elevator for another few hours with no sign of pursuit. Even Wei-Yong was unable to catch a hint of anyone following them. This worried Fa deeply. And now it seemed they had stumbled into a pack of raptors, big two-legged beasts, agile and ferocious and smart. With Shan badly wounded, Ming-Wa out of commission and Wei-Yong unable to use her skills. And as so often happened, Li Fa's skills with the dangerous forces of the Shadow Realm would put her friends in more jeopardy than the predators ever could.

The pack closed in on both sides, heads low, gauging the reaction of the prey. Fa urged her mount forward, sternly controlling its desire to bolt. The others followed but she could tell it was only a matter of time before either the pack attacked them or one of the mounts panicked. Either way, disaster.

Two of the creatures approached Tong Shan, sniffing loudly. Her wounds would attract their powerful sense of smell. Fa gestured to Wei-Yong.

"We have to protect Shan! I don't care if that assassin sees. Do something."

Shan swung away from the stalking predators. At first Fa thought her injured friend had collapsed, but Shan grabbed a heavy rock off the ground and then levered herself back into her saddle. She gave a casual heave and the rock cracked one of the beasts across the skull with a hollow clonk. Shaking its head, the creature retreated. As did all the others.

Shan grinned at Fa.

"Protect me? Hah."

Fa rolled her eyes.

"Let's move on. We can make another good march before nightfall, I think. And keep an eye out in case those things come back."

"Hey, Guang Ling. You got any food in that fancy bag of yours?"

*****

"Shan! What are you doing?"

The big woman looked back into the cave where Ming-Wa stood glaring at her.

"Collecting firewood."

"Because...?"

"Barbecue...?"

"Fire...?"

Shan stood thinking for a minute. She scowled.

"Right. No fire."

She stomped back into the cave they'd found. The canyon darkened quickly as night fell, and though the peaks above them still glowed with the last rays of sunset, the canyon floor lay indistinct and gloomy. Inside the shallow cave Fa and Wei-Yong arranged sleeping furs. Fa looked up as Shan's silhouette blocked what little light had been coming in through the cave mouth.

"Shan, will you lie down? You need to rest."

"I feel fine."

Guang Ling scuttled away as Shan swayed in place. The clerk watched nervously as Fa and Wei-Yong took their injured friend's arms and guided her to the furs.

"Just lie down. You'll feel better in the morning."

"Fine. I feel fine."

"Yes, we know. Just lie down now."

Once the big swordswoman was snoring quietly, the others sat and studied each other's faces in the growing dark. Wei-Yong dug the heel of her boot into the sandy floor of the cave and scratched behind the ears of Dau Li, her wolf.

"What if they catch up with us in the dark?"

Guang Ling's eyes radiated worry, but Fa just shrugged.

"We'll handle it, Wei-Yong. You know we will."

"But Ming-Wa needs sleep, and Shan's no good-- "

"I heard that."

"Go to sleep, Shan."

" -- and I can't use my bow..."

Fa looked the cave over. She nodded towards the opening.

"If there is trouble, get everyone to the back of the cave. I'll handle it."

"Fa..."

"I'll handle it."

*****

Dawn came late to the canyon floor. Burogerk studied the landscape before the cave opening. He noted the traces of passage on the sand and rock that indicated five figures going inside. Five mounts tethered behind the scraggly shrubs that did little to screen the entrance. Without looking back, Burogerk made two quick gestures with his left hand and scurried further down the canyon to take up a position beyond the cave entrance, just out of the line of the opening.

He did not take his eyes off the dark cavern opening as his compatriots filed into position. Maliss himself slithered across to only a few feet from him. Burogerk controlled his uneasiness. The pay was good, and the chance to kill Lohanese was always welcome, but a boss whose lower body coiled and rippled like a giant serpent's was hard to get used to.

Maliss looked over his group. Burogerk's powerful sword arm at his right side, Alrughf's sorcery by his left. The other two sorcerers arranged near the cave, and the archer up above, ready to pick off that troublesome psion. The fools slumbered in their cave. Not even a lookout stood to warn them death had arrived.

He smiled and nodded to Alrughf.

"Wake them up."

*****

"Goddess preserve us. There's... six of them out there. And that one's got to be this Maliss character. Look at him. He really is half-snake."

Wei-Yong peered through the shrub as their enemies arranged themselves out front. Fa listened carefully.

"I'll look later. Where are they?"

"The snake guy's right in front of the cave, with a swordsman on his right and a scrawny little bastard on his left. They're all gwailos. Two more unarmed folk over to the right, about... twenty feet out."

"In a line? How far apart are they?"

Wei-Yong craned her long neck.

"They're coming along this wall of the canyon, yeah, one ahead of the other."

"You said six."

"There's a gwailo with a crossbow hanging from the cliff wall about twenty feet above the snake guy."

Shan muttered.

"We can take them."

"It's been one day, Shan. We need to keep them occupied for two more days. We can't just kill them all."

Shan muttered some more. Ming-Wa looked away.

"I'm feeling better, Fa. Maybe I can --"

"You stay back. Everyone, get back."

Nobody questioned Fa's command. Even Shan retreated to the rear of the cave.

Fa stepped outside.

The snake-creature sneered at her.

"What are you supposed to be, a nun?"

He was bigger than a man, hairless, with dark green scales and a long serpentine body. His disdainful expression carried nothing but contempt. Fa matched him sneer for sneer.

"I am a divine servant of the Goddess. She Who Rules Over All. From her court in the Imperial City of Zuyang she has sent us forth to protect this woman. Return and report failure to your master, or else die here and now. I will speak no more words with you, inhuman assassin."

Maliss grinned.

"Or not."

As he drew breath to command his minions to attack, very complicated calculations took place inside Li Fa's skull. Inky tendrils swarmed up around in a sudden blossoming of darkness as she sent her mind down the precise pathways of sorcerous logic, forcing her will upon the deadly power even as she summouned it into existence. Dark energy shrieked at her and hungered to destroy, but her mind stood unclouded and performed the complex operations that bound the Shadow Realm to her desires.

Sorcery was a dangerous and difficult path to follow. Just attempting to learn the basics was more often than not fatal to the student. Very few ever lived to acquire Fa's degree of mastery. From the back of the cave Fa's friends watched in horror as the black nimbus around her expanded towards them, killing everything it touched.

One of Maliss' companions squeaked a terrified oath as Fa unloaded. Twin explosions of earth and rock and dust rippled outwards from where she stood. One tore along the canyon wall to blast the two sorcerers there up off the ground, tearing them to shreds as they screamed. The other blasted straight across the canyon floor to where Maliss, unprepared for such sudden violence, stared.

The rumbling wave slammed into the creature, sending him flying against the rock wall, and he watched in disbelief as his bodyguard, Burogerk, was thrown headfirst into a boulder. Maliss screamed.

As soon as the bolt struck, Fa knew her second attack had not been good enough. The crossbowman had gotten off a shot and she spun from the impact, falling to her knees with a painful grunt.

"Fa!"

Wei-Yong made to run forward, but Fa threw a hand up and her tall friend pinwheeled backwards into the cave.

"Get DOWN!"

She'd missed the scrawny little gwailo sorcerer. Fa gritted her teeth as his spell went off.

The cave erupted in a sudden fury of noise and darkness and choking dust. Fa felt herself lift off the ground and slam into some hard rock. She heard her friends yelling, Shan cursing of course, and their mounts dying noisily. Spitting out dust and shaking her head, Fa got to her feet and looked out what was left of the cave entrance.

The canyon floor now looked as though ambitious farmers had tried to plow the solid rock, with surprising success. Dark furrows of blasted stone and dirt crossed the defile and dust hung in the air in the aftermath of sorcerous battle. She saw the sorcerer, stumbling and choking. There was no sign of Maliss.

She noted the crossbowman in his high perch frantically trying to reload his weapon. She gestured and he shrieked, clawing at his chest as his ribcage flexed outward. His chest tore open and his bloody heart flew across the canyon to slap into Fa's hand. She dropped the sticky, dripping organ into the dust at her feet as his torn body plunged earthward. Glowering with poorly-held-in rage, Fa stalked across the canyon to Alrughf. 

Alrughf looked up as the sorceress came towards him. He'd heard that Lohanese women were expert sorcerers but the frozen ancestors of his tribe could not have warned him strongly enough. She was a demon. She'd cast two spells before he could even get off his first. She'd taken hold of the Shadow Realm as though it were something she did every day.

He cowered as she held up a bloodstained hand.

"Don't hurt me."

She slapped him.

"You're a very bad barbarian."


----------



## threshel

Wow.

Now I see why Fa gets so much respect, even from the most rebellious of her group.
Expertly portrayed.

J


----------



## ledded

Simply fantastic man.

You write some very good character interaction, setting some very nice scenes.

Then the battle, starting with a bang and reaching a furious climax culminating in the tearing out of a mans heart, which ends with:



			
				barsoomcore said:
			
		

> "Don't hurt me."
> 
> She slapped him.
> 
> "You're a very bad barbarian."



I love it.  I laughed my @ss off.

Great stuff.


----------



## barsoomcore

"Okay, so a one-armed candlemaker and the Goddess walk into a bar..."

"Shan."

"But it's funny, Ming-Wa."

"Shan."

"I never get to have any fun."

Fa sighed and looked over at Wei-Yong, who was trying not to laugh at the never-ending squabble between their friends. The lanky woman lay in the bow of the rowboat, one long arm resting across Dau Li's fearsome muzzle. Overhead, the dark roof of the natural cavern hurtled by as their boat slipped silently down the underground river that led out of Lang-xia-gu and would, according to Guang Ling's directions, bring them directly under the village of Liao-chung.

Somewhere in the darkness behind them the spirit creature Maliss followed them, Fa was sure of it. They'd encountered no sign of him yesterday, but still Wei-Yong had to maintain her disguise as Tang Fei Liu, helpless daughter of Merchant Tang, whom the Angels were supposedly escorting to Liao-chung for her wedding. The outdoorsy woman was uncomfortable in expensive silks, but she did her best not to complain too much. After two full days and nights, however, her patience was wearing thin.

"How do people wear this crap? I can barely move."

Ming-Wa switched her disapproval from Shan's levity to Wei-Yong's outfit.

"The Goddess smiles on modesty. Excessive displays of wealth are repugnant to Her. Like earrings."

Wei-Yong sighed.

"Let the earrings drop, okay? I have to dress up like this."

"You could take off the earrings."

"I LIKE the earrings. They're mine. They're pretty. The Goddess likes us to be pretty, doesn't she?"

"The bartender looks at the one-armed candlemaker and he says -- "

"Shut up! Both of you just shut up!"

Wei-Yong smacked Ming-Wa across the back of her head, driving her friend down into the bottom of the boat.

Just in time to avoid the black-feathered arrow that shot out of the darkness behind them.

Ming-Wa flopped over onto her back and glared at Wei-Yong.

"What do you think -- "

She stopped, following Wei-Yong's horrified gaze to Li Fa, who stood above them.

With an arrowshaft protruding from her chest.

"Her Big Holy Boobies."

Fa's oath drew a shocked gasp from Ming-Wa. Ming-Wa gasped again as Fa convulsed, let out a deafening shriek, and collapsed into the bottom of the rowboat, twitching and shuddering. Wei-Yong jumped on her spastic friend, shouting to the others.

"Get down!"

Another arrow whined through the darkness, just missing Shan as the big woman dropped prone across the thwart where she'd been rowing. A steel arrowhead splintered the hull near Guang Ling's head.

"I guess he swims faster than Shan rows."

Another twang of a bow in the nearby darkness, and another arrow buzzed past. Wei-Yong edged upwards for a bit of a look.

They had mounted a torch on the bow of the rowboat, where it burned and illuminated a dim sphere around them. The ceiling overhead drifted in and out of view as it sometimes dropped down low enough that if she were standing, Wei-Yong could reach up and touch the slick stone. The black water on all sides was smooth, looking deceptively solid and reflective, like dark polished glass around their boat. To either side, dimly visible rock walls offered the only sign of movement as they slid past.

Somewhere behind them in the darkness their enemy lurked, obviously able to see in the dark and obviously able to catch up with them at his leisure.

Fa went limp, her breath rattling in her throat. Shan hefted a throwing axe. She looked to Wei-Yong for guidance.

"See him?"

"Nothing. He's behind us somewhere. He's in the dark and we're in the light. This isn't good."

Ming-Wa grinned.

"Let's's switch those conditions."

She concentrated briefly, and the torch lifted up into the air and scooted backwards thirty feet along the river, suddenly illuminating their surprised foe. Shan leapt up, the boat rocking dangerously, and hurled both her axes, each one scoring deeply on the upright body of the snake-man. He shrieked in rage and pain, and then shrieked again as Wei-Yong, lying flat with her bow horizontal, drove two arrows into his torso.

Water thrashed and the torch bobbed up into the air as he clawed at it, heedless of the wounds he'd just suffered. Shan brandished her sword.

"We got lots more of that for you, you snake... guy."

"Look out!"

Wei-Yong's warning came too late, as Maliss let go with an arrow of his own, just catching Ming-Wa enough on the shoulder to make her fall backwards. And forget about the torch. It plunged into the water.

Sudden darkness enveloped the women. Shan swore creatively.

"He can hear you, Shan."

"Right. Sorry, Wei-Yong."

"So can the Goddess."

"Right. Sorry, Ming-Wa. Sorry Goddess."

"Ming-Wa, have you any way to give us a little light?"

"Yeah, hang on a second."

There was a scraping and a few sparks, and another torch flared into life. Ming-Wa held it up warily.

Fa suddenly convulsed and got to her feet.

"What's going on?"

Shan tackled her.

"Stay down!"

Another arrow shot past. Ming-Wa again sent the torch flying down the river cavern. They heard a muttered curse, and a sudden splash. Only ripples were visible on the surface of the water.

"He's gone."

Shan helped Fa to find a seat, and then set about industriously rowing them ahead of the current. Ming-Wa and Wei-Yong gathered at the rear of the boat, watching. Without really thinking, Wei-Yong shed most of her "Tang Fei Liu" finery and plopped it on Guang Ling.

"We need my bow more than we need to fool him, I think. You'll do for now."

Ming-Wa nodded her approval of her friend's less ostentatious appearance. Wei-Yong frowned.

"Do you hear something?"

"No, Wei-Yong, I don't have ears the size of palm fronds, I'm not a -- wait, yeah. I do. Sort of a roaring, rumbling sound. Like a... a... "

"Like a waterfall."

They scrambled to the front of the rowboat, Maliss forgotten. Wei-Yong leaned forward, listening intently.

"We have to get in to the side, try and stop before we go over."

"Is it a big one?"

"I don't know, Ming-Wa. How would I know that?"

"Well, excuse me for asking. I'm a little worried that we're about to plunge to our deaths in some forsaken cavern beneath the Western Mountains."

"Don't panic."

"I'm not panicking. I just don't want to drown at the bottom of a waterfall."

Ming-Wa's anger evaporated at the sudden confusion on Wei-Yong's face as her friend turned away. The smaller woman followed Wei-Yong's gaze again, this time to Tong Shan.

Who was cheerfully rowing with all her might as they approached the unseen cataract.

"Shan! Back water! Get us to the edge. Weren't you listening?"

"Huh? What?"

*****

"My shoes are ruined."

"I thought the Goddess frowned on ostentation."

"Look, it's my shoes that are ruined. Not my earrings."

"Maybe there's a cobbler in that town. Or whatever it is."

The Angels had narrowly avoided a deadly plunge and found a ledge carved into the wall of the river cavern. That cavern opened up dramatically after the waterfall into a vast underground lake, and rather than try to find their way across the trackless water, the five women had decided to travel along the ledge, which seemed to run all the way around the vast cavern. They'd been travelling this way for over an hour when Wei-Yong saw lights up ahead.

The lights, as they drew nearer, appeared to be from a small collection of buildings perched on a high pier mounted above the lake. Not far from the pier, which stood twenty or thirty feet up from the water level on a forest of sturdy wooden pilings, the stone path they'd been following had turned into an oozing mud flat. Which was currently ruining Ming-Wa's shoes.

Shan grunted with the effort of carrying Li Fa, who still hadn't completely recovered from Maliss' arrow. She snarled at her friends.

"Less yelling, more walking. We're almost there."

"Why don't we call for help?"

Guang Ling put her suggestion into action, waving at the buildings and calling out a greeting. Wei-Yong, Ming-Wa and Shan all winced.

"It's probably different for you, but when we do that..."

A half-dozen crossbow bolts smacked into the mud around them.

"...People usually start shooting at us."

Wei-Yong grabbed a shocked Guang Ling and the four women ran as best as they could through the mud towards the pier, more crossbow bolts whistling through the air around them. They ran in among the pilings beneath the pier, shallow water sucking at their heels. Up against the rock wall of the cavern, a roughly constructed ladder led up to a hole in the platform above. Shan set Li Fa down tenderly, checking her friend's health. Li Fa managed a smile.

"Go get 'em."

"Shan! You can't go up that ladder!"

Ming-Wa stood between her muscular friend and the ladder.

"Sure I can."

"You'll get shot. They can just stand there and nail you with crossbows. It's certain death."

Shan picked Ming-Wa up and set her carefully down to one side. Wei-Yong strung her bow and peered up through the slats of the pier overhead. She caught a hint of movement and sent an arrow blurring upwards. It ripped between two planks and there was a startled cry. Wei-Yong nodded to Shan.

"Go."

The big woman leapt for the rungs of the ladder and raced upwards. Two crossbow bolts came rocketing down at her, one creasing her shoulder, but she disappeared through the hole at the top. Ming-Wa growled and ran to follow.

Wei-Yong sent two more arrows up through gaps in the planking. A couple of scattered bolts came downward, but obviously nobody could see her in the darkness beneath the pier. Guang Ling curled up in a ball and prayed quietly while Li Fa laboriously got to her feet and moved away from the ladder and Wei-Yong.

Up top. Shan popped up like an energetic child's toy, sweeping out her big sword with a ripple of confident laughter. She found herself facing at least a dozen uncertain fellows in rag-tag armour with swords and clubs of dubious quality. Behind them, glowering with reptilian menace, coiled Maliss.

Shan waved.

"Hi. Hope you didn't lose my axes, you slimy little worm."

Maliss hissed.

Outnumbered by more than ten to one, Shan charged.

She veered right and plowed into one end of the half-circle her enemies had formed around her. Sword flailing, she roared, shoulder-checked, spun, kicked and head-butted incautious opponents, sending them staggering backwards into each other, lopping off limbs and heads as the opportunities presented themselves. Her constant, ferocious pressure kept them from surrounding her and she left a trail of bleeding, thrashing, screaming bodies in her wake.

Ming-Wa clambered up the ladder and emerged at the top just in time to see Shan drive her opponents back just a little too vigorously. For a second she was alone, with no enemies nearby, and Maliss released an arrow at her.

Shan staggered back from the impact and fell to her knees with a scream of agony that tore at Ming-Wa's ears. Her sword clattered forgotten on the planks.

As the ruffians closed in on her friend, Ming-Wa turned her furious gaze on the smirking Maliss. To see that he had another arrow nocked, pointed straight at her. She saw his fingers come off the string and noticed how his hand flew back after releasing, saw the shaft propelled forward, spinning as the tail vanes took hold in the air, straight at her.

Ming-Wa's brain did whatever it was that Ming-Wa's brain did. It caught hold of that strange power her mind knew how to control, and with a purple flash, it changed reality.

The arrow stopped. It hovered directly in front of her burning eyes. She and Maliss stared at each other for a few seconds, the air between them crackling.

"No."

Ming-Wa lashed out with her thoughts. The arrow vanished in a burst of splinters and Maliss convulsed, dropping his bow, his long serpentine body thrashing as Ming-Wa held his mind captive to her power, delivering unbearable pain to him as he clutched at his head, shrieking. His minions hesitated, uncertain, looking between their screaming boss, the screaming swordswoman who'd just butchered so many of the their friends, and the slight young woman dressed in a simple robe who was apparently standing perfectly still doing nothing at all.

They gathered up what courage they had left after Shan's fearsome assault, and charged Ming-Wa.

Underneath the pier, Wei-Yong was still sending up the occasional arrow, unaware that Li Fa had drawn away from her. The sorceress concentrated, and again the swirling black field of Shadow formed around her. She withdrew a small statuette from her robe and, even as the Shadow energy collapsed around her and the statuette began to twitch in her hand, she staggered back to the ladder and threw it straight up into the air.

The little terra-cotta lion sailed up through the hole at the top of the ladder, barely noticed by the goons closing in on Ming-Wa.

Until it transformed in mid-air into a real live, full-size, angry lion. A great tawny beast that crashed onto the planks and snarled, pouncing on the startled ruffians in much the same manner Shan had done only seconds ago.

Two ferocious assaults within a minute were too much for the assembled goons. Wei-Yong's arrows sprouting from nowhere to pick off anyone who strayed too near a wide enough gap (and not very wide was wide enough) only served to amplify the panic, and soon the lion was roaring at an immobile Maliss, still locked in a grim contest of wills with Ming-Wa.

Shan got to her feet, still clutching the arrowshaft where it protruded from her side. The creature's arrows were somehow magically enhanced to cause intense pain, she reckoned, since no blow she'd ever suffered in her life had caused her such searing agony. Shan groaned with the effort of each step, snatching up her sword and using it as a crutch as she hobbled forward. She neared the snake-creature and spat onto its gleaming scales.

"Go explain yourself to the Goddess, reptile. Tell her Shan's sorry for the joke about the candlemaker."

Shan screeched as she brought her sword up over her head and down in a tremendous cut that split Maliss' upper body from his shoulder to his waist. Viscera slithered out of the gaping wound and without a word the snake-man collapsed.

As did Shan. As did Ming-Wa. As did Li Fa (as did her lion at the same moment).

Wei-Yong called up from beneath the pier, "Is everyone okay? Hello?"

*****

"Liao-chung, huh? Nice place."

"What do you mean? It's filthy. Look at these houses, they haven't been painted in years. And is that a shrine back there, behind all those empty barrels?"

"Empty beer barrels, I think. Yep, I'm going to like it here."

"They do seem to take their weddings pretty seriously. This is going to be a huge party."

"A jeweler's! Hey, Wei-Yong!"

Ming-Wa tried to protest but sighed and gave up as Tong Shan and Muen Wei-Yong rushed over to a stall to examine the jewelry offered in anticipation of the upcoming festivities. Surrendering the battle, Ming-Wa turned to smile ruefully at Li Fa, who was still hobbling a little from Maliss' arrow.

"A party should be fun, huh? We can take it easy for a while."

Li Fa smiled back.

"Remember the last party we were at?"

"Right."

Smiles broadened.

"It wasn't really Shan's fault. Those dancing bears provoked her."

"Ming-Wa, did you just defend Shan?"

"Nope. Look, clowns!"

The mountains hedging in around the town echoed back the music and voices of the excited folks preparing for the wedding of Xue Hark and Tang Fei Liu. Musicians tuned their instruments and housewives gossiped while coins changed hands, wine flowed and everybody insisted that they had the best story of the whole affair. The Angels kept quiet about their role in it all.

Mostly.

"So the one-armed candlemaker says, 'If that's where I dipped my wick, what's this candle made out of?'"

"Shan!"


----------



## barsoomcore

And that, folks, is the END of "Racing the Snake" -- the Angels managed to triumph over their fiendish foe and are now enjoying the celebrations in their own inimitable style. Obviously they were great fun to DM and everyone had a blast, and I am pestered with demands for another session before too long.

Only so much resisting I'm likely to do on that one...

Thanks to those who posted their comments. Very encouraging indeed.


----------



## threshel

Excellent!
I enjoy all your story hours, barsoomcore.

J


----------



## Desdichado

The second adventure seemed much more like it belongs in the same campaign setting as your other story hour.  I'm really starting to see the correspondances more.

As for a character that's in both, although under different names, that's a bit more tricky, isn't it?  My guess is that either Li Fa or Ming-Wa is the Demon Goddess back when she was young and innocent.


----------



## barsoomcore

The Demon Goddess was young, but I'm not sure she was ever innocent....


----------



## ledded

Most excellent, Barsoomcore.  Very, very good stuff.

I hope the stewardesses twist your arm into another sometime soon, I have thoroughly enjoyed reading this one again.  You do have a gift for storytelling.


----------



## Desdichado

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> The Demon Goddess was young, but I'm not sure she was ever innocent....



Well, I meant that relatively, of course!


----------



## ragboy

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Okay, here's the Story Hour associated with the game I ran for a bunch of friends, most of whom are Air Canada flight attendants. The group also included Mrs. Barsoom and a geography teacher. All women, all in their late twenties, early thirties, all smart and funny and more than ready for a little butt-kicking action.




Great stuff as usual, barsoomcore.

I was looking at your resume site...have you ever played *Sengoku*?


----------



## Puppy Kicker

It was the title that got me, and I'm glad it did.  Very good writing and a cool story.  Good show!


----------



## barsoomcore

ragboy said:
			
		

> Have you ever played Sengoku?



Nope. But I think I should. 

Everything I know about Chinese culture I learned from 80s and 90s era Hong Kong cinema. If that's not an accurate source, I don't want to know. I prefer assuming that your average Chinese woman is more than willing to jump onto a passing truck, sweep-kick a bad guy in the chops, or take a few hundred arrows in order to save the man she loves. Or just to prove she's tougher than you.

Which, as far as I can tell, she always is.  

Thanks for the kind words, folks. New updates coming for Dead Man's Chest and Barsoom Tales, I promise! Now that I've been fired, I have nothing but free time!


----------



## barsoomcore

Oh, and I'd just like to point out that this story hour has a tradition: one page of story, five pages of peanut gallery nonsense.

I'm WAITING...


----------



## Len

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> I'm WAITING...



Well, I guess there doesn't seem to be much point posting if there's no more DM-on-stewardess action forthcoming.   

But hey, I hear you have lots of free time now. It might be easier to schedule stewardess sessions because you don't have to wait for them all to show up in Vancouver. Whatever city they happen to meet up in, they can probably get you a seat on a flight there, and you could run Kung-Fu Angels games all over the world!

How's that for nonsense?


----------



## barsoomcore

Yeah, there was an extremely drunken party my wife got invited to (bridal shower, actually, so I didn't get invited) -- at around three AM I get a phone call from my wife asking me to come pick her up (party was just over a block from our apartment) and walk into a room full of thoroughly trashed stewardesses, who insist that I run another game for them post-haste.

So stay tuned, stewardess fans. The light has not gone out for our Angels...


----------



## BSF

Barsoomcore, you are kidding us right?  You show up to a room of drunk stewardesses at 3:00 AM?  Damn.  I know you are out a job right now, but what kind of karmic balance do you have?


----------



## barsoomcore

Stay tuned, Angel fans!

Next session is scheduled for a few weeks from this Saturday! Find out what Tong Shan, Li Fa, Muen Wei-Yong and Zheng Ming-Wa get up to at the wedding of Tang Fei Liu! Oh, it's gonna be a corker, it is!


----------



## barsoomcore

*Wedding Bells -- Part One*

Tang Fei Liu smiled gratefully. Wei-yong tried not to compare the wealthy merchant's daughter's fine robes with her own threadbare, stained travel furs. The two women still looked a lot alike, but they were very, very different

"The wedding is tomorrow, and of course my family has no house in Hsiao-pei-ho, so I and my ladies-in-waiting are staying at the Inn of the Fabled Stone. If you would be so terribly kind, ladies, to join us there, it would be a great honour."

Shan spoke, her furrowed brow indicating intense thought.

"You want us to become ladies-in-waiting?"

"No, no," Fei Liu waved a delicately jeweled set of fingers, "For tonight, the night before the wedding. I would be terribly honoured if you would be my bridal guards for this night."

Shan sighed in relief. Fa nodded.

"I see. This is one of those charming rustic customs where the bride sits secluded while everyone in town tries to get into her room. And we fight them off."

Fei Liu laughed.

"I'm sure there won't be any need for fighting. The people of Hsiao-pei-ho are good, kind people. It's all in fun, of course, but I would be very honoured."

Ming-Wa stepped forward and bowed stiffly.

"The honour is ours, Miss Tang. We will perform our duty as the Goddess commands."

"Of course, ladies, we will be pleased to provide your food and drink and a room at the inn for yourselves as well."

Shan and Wei-Yong brightened up considerably.

"As the Goddess commands."

*****

"This is the best job ever."

Shan held up a cup of wine and shared a grin with Wei-Yong. They sat with Ming-Wa and Fa at the foot of a staircase leading up to the balcony that circled the main room of the Inn of the Fabled Stone. The inn was packed with merrymakers in advance of the big wedding, and loud singing and the pounding of drunken fists more or less in time gave the place a festive atmosphere.

So far, nobody had troubled them or tried to get past them. The innkeeper grinned as he rolled another big ceramic jug of wine out from the storeroom. He'd been doing this steadily all night, and the sound of the paper seals breaking every time a table opened another came regularly through the din.

The Inn of Fabled Stone was constructed of heavy beams and pillars, with a high ceiling lost in a haze of smoke and dangling banners. Rough chandeliers creaked from oily ropes, swaying in the drunken roar of the of the crowd.

Wei-Yong stood up to stretch, leaning her lanky frame against the rough-hewn banister.

"You sure are tall."

She turned and looked down at the fellow who'd spoken.

"You sure are small."

"Ho Sien Ku. Hi. You wanna go somewhere?"

"What?"

"Somewhere. Anywhere."

"No. Go away, small person."

"I got songbirds."

"I'm not hungry."

Sien Ku stared at the tall woman in the rather wild furs and grinned.

"You're my kind of crazy, lady."

"Go away."

"I'll come back later."

Wei-Yong growled as the jaunty little fellow strolled off. Shan watched him go, considering.

"He's not, you know, ugly."

Wei-Yong gave her friend a glare.

"He doesn't even come up to my shoulder."

"Well, when you're lying down -- "

"Shan!"

Both women chuckled. They looked up as two women approached, and heard Ming-Wa and Fa stand up behind them. These were big women, broad-shouldered and heavy-set. Both carried two big jugs of wine, still sealed with paper across the mouths. They grinned at Shan and Wei-Yong, set all the jugs down and then one of the women picked up one and, eyeing Wei-Yong with a challenging glower, punched the seal open. The bar went almost completely silent, except for one young fellow still singing the chorus of "The Prettiest Maid".

"Where is my maid, my prettiest maid, where has my maid gone?"

Wei-Yong lifted her chin.

"A drinking contest, huh?"

She reached down and picked up a jug. It was heavy, sloshing with wine. She reached into the quiver that hung at her hip and yanked out an arrow. Flipping the shaft around in one hand, she stabbed it point-first through the seal and into the wine.

Her mouth opened as she withdrew the shaft and she caught the wine dripping off the arrowhead on her tongue. She considered. She grinned at her challenger.

And she passed the jug to Shan.

The challenger's glower lost a lot of its challenge as Shan easily hefted the jug, tilting it up over her head. Wine cascaded down into her open mouth.

Caught off guard, the other woman hurriedly followed Shan's example.

"I have no breakfast, my table's not laid, somebody tell me what's happened to my maid?"

For a few seconds, everyone in the bar (except the soloist who moved on to the third verse) watched as the two big women gulped wine. Wei-Yong grinned. She'd won nearly as much money on Shan's drinking as Shan had won on Wei-Yong's archery. Ming-Wa watched in testy disapproval, and Fa kept her eyes on the crowd, ignoring the contest.

The local woman put up a good fight, but Shan was still going strong when her rival coughed, spluttered, and put the half-empty jug down, shaking her head. The bar erupted in cheers and yells of outrage, and coins changed hands all around.

Shan paid no notice. She kept going until she'd finished the first jug, set it down, picked up the other and turned to the second woman.

"You ready?"

Wei-Yong, seeing Ming-Wa's disapproval, leaned over and spoke quietly.

"We all serve the Goddess in our ways, Ming-Wa."

The soloist finished his warbling tune.

"And your maid will never come home...."

After the second woman had also stumbled backwards, unable to keep up with Shan's spectacular capacity, the big swordswoman grinned. She passed the half-empty jugs to Wei-Yong, who did her best. Soon they were singing "The Prettiest Maid" themselves.

"This is the best job ever."

"Couple of ladies like you two shouldn't be working at all."

Shan and Wei-Yong turned at the smooth, cultured voice. And raised their eyebrows in unison at the two well-dressed young men smiling at them. Shan nudged Wei-Yong.

"You can have the tall one."

Both women grinned with such excited glee that the young men stepped back a bit.

"So," drawled Wei-Yong, "We shouldn't be working? Couple of--" she bowed elaborately to Shan, "ladies like us?"

Shan attempted to bow back. Given her size, her armour and her intoxication, it was spectacular, if not entirely successful.

The men looked at each other, gathering their courage.

"Why don't you come with us? We've got cash. Enough for a good time."

Wei-Yong waved a finger at them.

"No. No sir. We're guarding. What's 'er name, looks like me. Tang. Miss Tang. Little Miss Merchant Tang. Wee Little -- Ouch."

Wei-Yong frowned as Ming-Wa cracked her one across the skull.

"Hey. Shan. Ming-Wa's hitting me."

"That's because you're drunk, Wei-Yong."

"M'not."

"Sir, does she look drunk to you?"

The young men drew themselves up as though it were time for them to assert some control over the situation.

"We are prepared to offer you ladies a sizeable sum of money if you will vacate the stairs temporarily."

Shan crossed her arms as Wei-Yong slumped against the railing.

"Not happening, handsome. But you can sit right here next to me, if you like."

"Gems?"

"Nope."

"Gold cloth?"

"Nothing doing."

"An estate in the valley?"

"Pass on by, buddy."

"Is there anything you'd like?"

Wei-Yong perked up.

"How about a dance, cutie?"

"What?"

The startled young man found himself with nearly six feet of drunk Wei-Yong in his arms before he'd registered the question. Shan watched with approval.

"Hey, look at them go. She's got moves, that girl."

Fa chuckled at the sight. Wei-Yong was all arms and legs, stumbling and laughing but somehow managing to keep circling to the music. Seeing her example, patrons all across the jug-room leapt to their feet and in seconds the place was a madhouse of sudden clattering dance steps as the band raised their volume and their tempo, and soon everyone was whirling and stomping around the room.

Shan grabbed the other fellow and swept him into the crowd, keeping close to the stairs but otherwise enjoying herself. Fa grinned to notice the young man's feet seemingly suspended above the floorboards as Shan whirled him around. 

Ming-Wa tapped one slippered foot, her face as serious and composed as ever.

That dance finished and another one started, and another, and eventually Wei-Yong and Shan returned to the steps, laughing and heaving with their exertions.

"Ming-Wa, you ought to dance sometime. You could use it."

Ming-Wa sniffed.

"I do as the Goddess commands. Bless her always."

The others mumbled, "Bless her always," in response.

"For servants of the Goddess, you are very shabbily dressed. But then I suppose you really are little more than peasant girls with aspirations, aren't you?"

The four women looked up from where they sat on the steps to see a heavy-set woman in fine silk robes sneering down at them.

"Pao Hsien, tailor. I can have fine new clothes ready for you all tomorrow morning if you will stand aside."

Ming-Wa stood up.

"The Goddess abhors vanity."

"Does she really? Funny how everyone makes such a big point about how beautiful she is, then."

The other three stood up, anger darkening their features. Ming-Wa raised an accusing finger.

"Do not dare to speak ill of the Goddess."

"No, no, of course not. Now, about these new clothes. You cannot deny you require new clothes." The woman sneered. "Rather desperately, I'd say."

Ming-Wa glowered. Fa shook her head with a smile.

"Our apologies, Madam Tailor, but our duty demands we stay here. Thank you for your offer."

The tailor sniffed and returned to the crowd. The four grinned at each other.

"Fools!"

Fa turned in time to see six black-clad figures plunging through the crowd towards them. Pao Hsien stood across the room, pointing at them.

"You serve evil incarnate, you twisted fools! You will burn with your foul mistress in the fires of hell when we are done with you!"

Shan's grin broadened.

"This is the best job ever."


----------



## barsoomcore

Oops, I did it again.

Here we go with "Wedding Bells" -- the sequel to last episode ("Racing the Snake") -- in which our heroines are tasked with stopping evil, protecting the innocents, and making sure a wedding goes off without more than the expected number of hitches.

Fasten your seat belts and make sure your seatback is in the locked and upright position. The ladies are taking the bad guys to school once again, kiddos.


----------



## Desdichado

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Oops, I did it again.



Well...  you're not that innocent.


----------



## barsoomcore

Nor am I that young.


----------



## barsoomcore

Usually, at the sudden appearance of onrushing doom, Wei-Yong and Shan would react with immediate and unequivocal results.

This time, intoxicated as they were, their reactions, while immediate, were not quite as effective as usual.

Wei-Yong fumbled with her bow, dropped it, smacked her head on the railing and collapsed on the stairs in an ungainly tangle of limbs, groaning.

Shan looked around at the incoming assailants and put up her fists, ignoring the flashing knives in their hands.

Ming-Wa, unable to ignore the knives, grabbed her big friend and heaved with all her strength, trying to drag Shan backwards. And having no effect whatsoever. Shan, unaware that Ming-Wa was clinging to her armour, leaned forward, lifting the slender woman right off the ground. Ming-Wa's slippers dangled above the floorboards as she kicked, trying to get Shan to notice her.

Li Fa raced to the top of the stairs, trying to put some distance between her friends and herself before she called upon the dark hungry power that served her will. Whirling up on the balcony, she looked down into the large common area to see four assailants come leaping through the crowd towards the others. And two clambering up the pillars to where she stood, alone.

Ming-Wa dropped from her friend's shoulders and scrambled back as Shan lurched forward, shrugging her armoured shoulders and raising her arms to catch the slashing blades on the reinforced plates that protected her. The sudden din of metal on metal drowned out the cries of the crowd, which made the explosive grunt of the first fellow to receive one of Shan's fists in his gut all the more penetrating. He went down, unconscious, while Shan continued to fend off the other three.

Wei-Yong shook her addled head and saw the two climbing towards Fa.

"I'm coming, Li Fa!"

She staggered up the steps and leapt up onto the railing to get a better angle against the two men clinging below.

Her balance was not up to its usual standards, however, and her long legs flew out from under her and she crashed down on to the balcony planks, smacking her head hard again.

"Ow."

Seeing she was not about to be rescued, Li Fa set about smacking her would-be assailants with her oaken staff as they tried to climb over the balcony railing. Shouts of pain followed as her sturdy staff cracked sharply across hairy knuckles, and wailing, the two unfortunates plunged into the crowd below, demolishing tables and disappearing into a mass of drunken, angry patrons.

Wei-Yong got woozily to her feet, grinned at Li Fa, and then caught sight of her friend Shan with three knife-wielding bad guys around her.

"I'm coming, Shan!"

Fa watched as the lanky woman leapt from the balcony to snatch at a hanging banner.

"Try not to kick too much butt, girl."

Fa winced as her friend lost her grip and with a strangled yelp plummetted into the crowd.

But watched, bemused, as the drunken woman bounced to her feet, sprang over half-a-dozen brawling regulars, and swung a broken chair leg at one of Shan's attackers. The wood connected with the man's knife and sent it flying to embed itself in a pillar next to Shan's head. Startled, Shan appeared to notice for the first time that her opponents were armed, and with very little fuss, set about taking their knives away.

The surprised assassins had only a second or so to gape at their suddenly empty hands before Shan's fists began connecting sharply with their jaws. And, shortly thereafter, their skulls connected sharply with the floorboards.

Li Fa, standing up on the balcony, flicked a copper coin at a woozy thug as he tried to stand up.

"Go back to your mistress. Maybe she'll sell you some better clothes."

Shan grinned as she helped a reeling Wei-Yong to stay on her feet.

"This is the best job ever."

*****

"You seem taller in the sunlight."

"Not so loud, please."

Wei-Yong winced as her small admirer, Ho Sien Ku, kept up a stream of noisy compliments alongside her.

The four women (and one small man) had joined a massive procession as Tang Fei Liu and her bridal party made their way to the Temple of the Submissive Eye. Most of the town had come out to join the celebrations, and the long parade wound up through the steep streets of Hsiao-pei-ho from the Inn of the Fabled Stone, where less-energetic celebrants still remained, drinking what little of the landlord's stock had survived the night's debauchery.

Li Fa, taking pity on her hung-over friend, crossed to where Ho Sien Ku was. She addressed him gravely.

"Who was that woman last night? The tailor?"

Ming-Wa joined in, her face set in repressed fury.

"Is she an enemy of the Goddess?"

Sien Ku obviously didn't quite know how to take the very serious and intense queries addressed to him. He bowed, stumbling a little as he tried to keep up with the longer-legged women.

"Your ladyships. The tailor? Pao Hsien? I, I wouldn't know, your ladyships. She's very wealthy, I know. They say foreigners visit her sometimes."

"What kind of foreigners? What about?"

Li Fa put a restraining hand on her friend. Ming-Wa narrowed her eyes at the short Sien Ku, her anger at the notion that anyone could disregard her beloved Goddess apparent on her face.

"I don't know. I don't know. It's just, just what people say. I don't know."

Sien Ku looked longingly at where Wei-Yong walked with Tong Shan. Li Fa took pity on the man and asked a less accusatory question.

"What else have people been saying?"

She smiled. Li Fa smiled very rarely, her usual expression being one of stern patience. But she offered the trepidatious Sien Ku a warm smile that made her seem ten years younger than usual, and he relaxed a fair bit.

"Well, they say that Caedmonish bandits have been coming down from the mountain passes and kidnapping the children."

"What children?"

"The children who've been disappearing."

"Children have been disappearing?"

"Yes, for a while now."

"Who's been taking them?"

"Bandits from Caedmon."

"Hm."

The women slowed, along with the townspeople around them, as they came up over a rise in the street and caught sight of the temple, situated on a broad lawn of carefully-trimmed grass, overlooking the river where it tumbled along in its rocky bed. The Temple of the Submissive Eye stood a full three stories high, open on all sides, surrounding a massive statue of the Goddess in all her glory. The upper floors of the temple were open galleries running around all sides of the statue as it rose up to nearly touch the roof of the temple itself. Through arches the statue could be seen, blinding with gold and color. All along the eaves at each floor hung brightly coloured bells with long streamers that caught the wind and set the bells ringing in an unending musical chatter that rang out over the nearby streets.

Shan, Ming-Wa, Wei-Yong and Fa all bowed their heads and made an obeisance, breathing prayers to their cherished Goddess.

Half the city seemed to be pouring into the temple grounds, greeting the elderly Chief Sister with familiar waves. Yan Ting bowed and waved back, wrinkled face beaming. She caught sight of the Angels and hurried over, bowing incessantly.

"Ladies, ladies, ladies! Welcome! The Submissive Eye welcomes the blessed agents of Her Glorious Dedication."

Ming-Wa sank to her knees on the grass and bowed.

"The Bended Knee thanks the Submissive Eye. All praise to Her Infinite Beauty."

Li Fa did likewise.

"The Gentle Hand thanks the Submissive Eye. All praise to Her Endless Compassion."

Wei-Yong and Shan remained standing, but bowed. They mumbled in unison, "The Fierce Heart thanks the Submissive Eye. All praise to Her Unbounded Will."

All five women spoke in ritual.

"Body and Heart and Mind we serve thee, Goddess. Body and Heart and Mind."

Straightening up, Ming-Wa regarded the temple, rapidly filling up with townspeople, with satisfaction. She smiled.

"It's a beautiful temple, Sister Yan. You honour Her well."

The old lady bowed, pleased, and led the four women up the exterior steps and into the ground floor of the temple.

From here, the statue towered above, the Goddess' perfect face smiling down in serene grace on all the worshippers clustered around her feet. Overcome with religious fervour, Ming-Wa sank to her knees again and sang a prayer of thanksgiving. Wei-Yong and Shan and Fa looked around.

There were many Sisterhoods in service to the Goddess, each with its own traditions and means of expressing devotion. The Submissive Eye was one such, common in rural communities, usually building and tending temples much like this one, though none of the Angels had seen one quite so grandiose. The pillars and beams were decorated with intricate filigree, the railings bright and multi-colored and joyous. The floor where Ming-Wa knelt was formed of well-set marble blocks, polished to a mirror-like finish and inlaid with silver and gold in Tianese characters expressing love and thanks towards the Goddess.

Townspeople milled about, pressed together in their desire to watch the ceremony. Ming-Wa had to stand to avoid being crushed in the crowd. Above them, on the first balcony, facing the statue, knelt Tang Fei Liu and Xue Li. Beside them stood Uncle Tan, who would be performing the marriage ceremony itself. He opened his mouth to speak to the crowd below.

Before he could speak, the floor shook and with a sudden, splintering crack that seemed to shake even the massive statue of the Goddess, heavy marble blocks flew into the air, plunging earthward and crushing wedding guests before they could scream.

Once the demonic beasts, their clawed feet scraping on the stone and their long foreclaws dripping with foul ichor, pulled themselves out of the smoking hole in the floor, there was plenty of time of screaming.


----------



## Desdichado

Cool!  So bandits from Caedmon, huh!  Hah!  There's a link.  Although it's not like I'm surprised that this appears to be Lohan-El...


----------



## barsoomcore

One of the more annoying aspects of Barsoom is that practically nobody anywhere agrees on what to call just about anything. Drove my players crazy trying to figure out where Lohan-El was -- till they discovered that nobody in Lohan-El called it "Lohan-El".


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## Stone Angel

As I sit and wonder about this story hour and it is good by the way, really good. I can't help but think you were in a room full of drunken stewardesses and you played D&D awesome and at the same time a huge let down. And then I wonder where did I go wrong, *hustles off to try and convince fiancee that she should become an airline attendant.


LOL Your story hour really is good Barsoomcore I like it a lot

The Seraph of Earth and Stone


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## Desdichado

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> One of the more annoying aspects of Barsoom is that practically nobody anywhere agrees on what to call just about anything. Drove my players crazy trying to figure out where Lohan-El was -- till they discovered that nobody in Lohan-El called it "Lohan-El".



Yet not at all unrealistic.  When we can't really agree on whether to say German, Deutsch, aleman, tedesco, nemetskii or various other appellations that are obviously not cognates for the exact same nationality, why should a fantasy world be any different?


----------



## barsoomcore

Yes, exactly. One thing that drove me crazy in Japan was the blase nature they seemed to have over what they called their own country. There's Japan Air Lines (JAL) and All Nippon Airlines (ANA). I mean, come on, make a decision!

Stone Angel: thanks! And keep dreaming the impossible dream.


----------



## barsoomcore

Shan's sword sang with apparent bloodlust as she yanked it free of its sheath. Between where the Angels stood and where the beasts clawed themselves free of the torn-up floor milled hundreds of suddenly terrified villagers, just beginning to surge back from the horrors that had so suddenly erupted in their midst.

Wei-Yong's reactions were a little more aplomb-filled than they had been last night. She strung her bow without a thought and sent a couple of shafts whizzing right through the heaving crowd, just missing heads and nearly slicing an ear off before striking one of the beasts right in its throat.

It gurgled, spraying blood over the crowd, but didn't appear otherwise dissuaded by her efforts. Claws tore into defenseless villagers and the temple exploded with screams as the wedding guests, packed tightly around the feet of the Goddess' statue, began pouring out, stumbling among each other in their desperation to get free.

Shan brandished her sword and howled. As panic-sticken and terrified as they were, the fleeing guests somehow managed to clear an aisle between her and the creatures. Shan charged.

Even as she reached the knot of ugly beasts, two of them leapt straight upwards, dangling for a second from the balcony before pulling themselves up with long wiry arms. She plowed into the three that were left and steel flashed, claws tore and Tianese oaths began to spiral up into the temple air.

Li Fa pushed her way through the crowd, looking for a clear space where she could call upon the Shadow Realm to power her sorcery. Ming-Wa realised the two creatures on the second floor were closing in on Tang Fei Liu and Xue Li and stretched out one hand, pressing the other to her brow in concentration. There was a flash of shimmering violet, and the two creatures staggered as some unseen force pummelled them, shaking the temple beams and sending dust and paint flecks flying.

Shan hollered and laid about her in all directions, slashing madly at any leathery, wrinkled, claw-festooned limb she saw. Heavy blows knocked her from side to side, but she got her shoulders and hips into one cut and tore one creature's abdomen open. It collapsed, writhing and shrieking.

Shan's gleeful triumph turned to frustration as another of the creatures grabbed hold of her sword and sent it flying. Undaunted, the big woman took hold of the powerful beast and drove it down into the tiles, ignoring the slashing claws and talons of the third.

As wedding guests careened out of the temple, Li Fa found empty space easier to come by. She spun, her heavy robes twisting around her, and clenched her fists as she concentrated on the two creatures upstairs. Dark mist swirled up and suddenly sucked back into the ground as up above, searing flames erupted around the stunned beasts. One stumbled free, howling with pain, but the other could only shriek in its high, inhuman voice as the sorcerous flames peeled the skin from its flesh.

The surviving beast leapt up to the third level, intent on getting past Fa's barrier of flame and attack the wedding couple. It teetered on the railing, some thirty feet above the temple floor, near the height of the statue's shoulders.

Wei-Yong, bent backward to get the angle right, sighted and let fly.

The teetering beast froze for a second, suddenly sprouting a feathered shaft from the underside of its mouth. It fell from its unsteady perch and plunged straight down in a tangled ball of arms and legs to crash right next to Shan.

Covered in gore and with her armour scored and seared by powerful claws, Shan got wearily to her feet with the remaining creature's head caught in a tight hold. As the others watched, she wrenched hard and with a very loud crack, the beast went limp and she dropped it to the tiles.

A sudden black smoke boiled out of the creatures and every drop of blood they'd shed, and in only a heartbeat or so, there was no sign of them except the torn flagstones and the marks on Shan's armour. The four women looked around the now-deserted temple. Three mangled bodies of unfortunate villagers lay motionless. From above, the wedding couple looked down in mute horror.

Wei-Yong spoke with her usual quiet drawl.

"I can hardly wait for the reception."

Li Fa was looking down the hole the things had come out of.

"There's something down here. Stairs, it looks like."

Ming-Wa bustled over.

"Stairs? Where do they go?"

Fa looked over at her friend, expressionless.

"They go down."

Mau Li, Wei-Yong's massive wolf, growled deep in her throat, bristling at the exposed stairway. All four of the women drew closer together as they peered into the darkness below. Wei-Yong knelt beside her canine companion and stroked the big animal's ruff.

"She smells blood. Down there."

Li Fa caught sight of the elderly Sister responsible for the temple, Yan Ting, watching them fearfully from a temple entrance. Her dark eyes flashed with anger as she gestured the old woman forward.

The Sisterhoods of the Goddess all served Her in their own ways, but there was a definite hierarchy between them. And there was no question that the Sisterhood of the Submissive Eye ranked well below the organizations the Angels belonged to. Yan Ting scurried forward, bowing and mumbling prayers to Her glory.

Fa was not inclined to be gracious.

"What's this? What is this beneath this temple?"

The old woman gaped in astonishment.

"I've never seen such a thing. I can't imagine--"

"Sister, if you know anything about this, I charge you in Her holy name to tell us now."

"By the beauty of Her presence, I've never seen it before. I cannot tell you anything about it, as She may witness."

Ming-Wa, burning with indignation, pointed to the bodies.

"You must clean this immediately! Those poor people should be buried here in Her hallowed ground, and this whole temple rededicated once it has been cleansed! This is sacrilege!"

Shan and Wei-Yong shared a look, shrugged and started down the steps. Ming-Wa noticed.

"Where are you going?"

"Down."

*****

Beneath the temple, Ming-Wa's outrage only increased. A long hall lined with votive statuettes revealed blasphemy; the tiny figures of the Goddess had been defaced with crude, lascivious markings, smeared with blood and other, less seemly, substances.

All four women fumed with righteous anger. They had spent their lives in the service of the Goddess, had seen with their own eyes again and again how Her strength and compassion had benefitted the world. To see Her image so degraded, so fouled, offended them deeply.

They made their way down the subterranean hall, passing countless statuettes of their beloved Goddess, every one made to represent a mockery of the purity and beauty the Angels worshipped.

At last the flickering of Ming-Wa's torch revealed a door ahead. Mau Li bristled again but did not growl. Wei-Yon put up a hand for silence and closed her eyes, concentrating.

"Crying."

Shan's eyes widened.

"The children?"

The doors flew open as Tong Shan drove forward and stumbled into a wide chamber, a prayer hall of a type the Angels knew well, but transformed into a foul torture chamber. All of the women gagged on the stench of blood, rot and waste. The room held two rows of pedestals, each a little taller than Wei-Yong, and each supporting a complex array of rusted chains from which hung emaciated children.

The children were grey and mottled, their eyesockets empty, accusing holes. The sound of crying filled the room, but these children would never be able to weep. They were obviously dead, hanging half-rotted from their chains.

Horrified beyond speech, the women moved into the room. Sacred murals had been defaced, made grotesque and shocking with foul depictions of the Goddess. The stench increased and the sound of sobbing remained.

Shan ran to one of the bodies, rattling at the chains in an attempt to free the dead child from its shackles. Ming-Wa did likewise.

Fa and Wei-Yong, looking around themselves in shock, moved further into the room. They did not notice as the hung corpses raised their decaying heads and grinned.

Shan and Ming-Wa both did, but before they could cry out, the corpses they'd been trying to free convulsed and tore open with a sickening wrench. Horrid ropes of intestines and organs flopped around the startled women and dragged them forward into a foul embrace, where undead jaws tore at them and clawlike hands scrabbled against their backs.

Shan swore. Ming-Wa screamed. For a second, Li Fa and Wei-Yong could only stare, horrified. They realised the other corpses were reaching towards them, straining against the chains holding them against the pedestals. Their friends were half-buried in putrefying flesh, struggling to free themselves.

"Fools. You think you serve beauty. You are servants of foulness. Of evil. Of putrescence."

The two women whirled to find a grinning skeletal creature with blazing eyes and a mammoth axe.

"Says you."

Wei-Yong nocked and arrow and was about to let fly, but for once she wasn't fast enough. The fearsome axe flashed out and scored a deep gash in the tall woman's upper arm, biting to the bone and knocking her against a nearby pedestal. Wei-Yong groaned and slumped to her knees.

Her friends were all too near her. Fa looked up at the undead creature preparing its axe for another blow and gritted her teeth.

She called upon the Shadow Realm, but no tendrils of blackness rose about her. Instead, she allowed the kiss of Shadow to travel right up her spine, its cold emptiness at first thrilling her with the power of the void, but then penetrating into her, tearing at her very being. Ruthlessly she ignored the certain death climbing up inside her. Through supreme effort of her will she kept the deadly touch of Shadow from expanding, drawing the power she needed even as her life force began to ebb away with unrelenting agony.

Wei-Yong looked up at her stern friend, even in the haze of pain from her wound able to see the tears on Fa's face as she resisted the hungry destructiveness of Shadow and bent it to her needs. The flagstones erupted at her feet as a roaring energy surged across the room to strike the mocking guardian, sending it flying in an explosion of stone and dust.

Now Fa sank to her knees. Wei-Yong struggled to find her bow in the dark chaos, driving herself to her feet as she heard the undead warrior doing the same not far off.

Ming-Wa, choking on the rotting ichor of the dead child, called upon the vital power of her mind and unleashed a blast of purifying energy that disintegrated not only the thing clutching at her, but the others chained up further down the hall.

Shan still struggled with the one holding her, heaving against the pedestal in a vain effort to tear herself free. Animated entrails sucked at her, wrapping themselves ever more tightly around her arms and her torso. She pressed her hands against the pedestal and strained, groaning as she tried to free herself.

Ming-Wa saw her friend's plight and shook her head.

"Your sword, Shan."

"Oh, right."

One cut was enough to dismember the unholy thing and Shan staggered back. She and Ming-Wa heard a shriek from the darkness up ahead, and ran forward to help their friends.

The shriek was Fa as she reeled aside from another sweeping blow of the warrior's battleaxe. She ducked around a pedestal and could only hope that none of her friends were in range. Trying again to contain Shadow within herself would surely kill her, so she let its hungry darkness swirl free as it usually did and her disciplined mind flashed through complex calculations.

The floor erupted yet again, but this time black chains burst out of the ruined flagstones, writhing like living things as they rattled around the undead warrior's limbs, pinning him in place.

Wei-Yong at first sighted on one of the empty eyesockets, then shrugged and picked the center of the creature's brow. Its skull shattered with the impact, and all four women sagged in relief. Wei-Yong gripped her injured arm.

"That hurts."

Ming-Wa found her torch, still flickering on the floor, and raised it up again. The chamber now looked as though industrious stone masons had used it to dump the shattered refuse of their work. The floor, once smoothly set, was ruptured and uneven, the flagstones strewn about in disorder. Dust filled the air, swirling about them all.

She spoke with a fervour they all shared.

"Let's go talk to Sister Yan again."


----------



## barsoomcore

"Something is going on here! These women are stealing our children and feeding them to their Goddess! We have to do something!"

The four Angels clambered out from underneath the temple to find Uncle Tan, who'd seemed so kindly and charming only an hour or so ago, hectoring the crowd of would-be wedding guests about the evils of the Goddess and her servants. Some people were shouting in disagreement, but others were considering the old man's words.

Li Fa caught sight of elderly Sister Yan Ting hovering near Uncle, meekly trying to interrupt his tirade. Face dark with anger, Fa strode over to where the old woman stood.

"Come with me, Sister."

Yan protested a bit but followed the imposing Angel. Ming-Wa had heard Uncle Tan's words and only Shan and Wei-Yong's efforts were keeping her from charging out there and confronting him. Fa walked Yan a ways from the crowd and then whirled on the old woman.

"What in the name of Her holy beauty is going on beneath this temple?"

Yan stammered and spluttered and Fa grabbed the collar of her robe, shaking the old woman in her rage.

"What is going on? You have desecrated statues of the Goddess! Explain yourself!"

Terrified, Yan could only shake her head, gasping out her innocence. Fa threw her back. She lowered her voice so that the crowd around Uncle Tan wouldn't hear her.

"There are children down there. Children who have been murdered and their bodies used for necromatic purposes. What do you know about this?"

"Nothing, Sister, I swear! I know nothing of this! I just tend the temple and keep Her image clean, honestly, I don't know a thing about this..."

Fa glared. Yan shrank in on herself, still protesting that she knew nothing. She was still protesting as Fa turned on her heel and stalked away.

The tall woman strode right past her friends and back downstairs. Wei-Yong looked back and forth between Fa and Yan, and momentarily forgot about Ming-Wa. The furious young woman broke free of Wei-Yong's distracted grip and actually managed to drag Shan forward a few steps, such was the power of her fury as she addressed Uncle Tan.

"Heretic! Liar!"

Shan gave up and let her friend go. Ming-Wa stormed up to Uncle Tan. She was a small woman, but she carried a lot of presence around with her and, angry as she was, she immediately quelled the murmuring crowd. Uncle Tan retreated from her glare. Ming-Wa turned to address the crowd.

"For how many generations has the Goddess watched over us all? For how long have we been blessed with the peace and justice that is her rule? Who are we to deserve such generosity and compassion?"

She whirled on Tan, emphasizing her point with an accusing finger.

"Who are we to doubt and suspect Her love?"

Tan shook his head, unable to respond. She turned back to the crowd.

"This temple has stood here for many long years, offering you all a place to focus your hearts and the love you naturally feel towards Her. To show Her your willingness to serve. For many years the Sisterhood of the Submissive Eye has served you all. But when trouble strikes, you think to blame your loving Goddess? You think suspect Her?"

Tan tried to get a word in.

"But Pao Hsien says -- "

"Pao Hsien? The tailor? That witch spoke against the Goddess?"

Ming-Wa's fury rose to new heights.

"Where is she?"

*****

Fa, bearing a smoky torch, retraced the steps she and her friends had taken among the dark passages beneath the temple. She came into the desecrated worship hall where the torn and horrible corpses of the children remained. Uttering a prayer to Her kindness, Fa knelt, stuck the torch upright in the packed sand of the floor and drew upon her dark power.

Shadows hissed up all around her and she lay her hands on the dead child's brow. Fa's eyes fluttered closed. In the corners of her mind, images arose, fitful and discontented. In a moment they drew together and she saw the room around her, lit with dozens of candles, and before her standing an imposing woman in dark robes. The woman held a long straight razor in one hand and a nameless mass of dripping flesh in the other. She was chanting, though the image was silent. The woman turned and Fa saw her face.

Her eyes closed, alone in the dark, not even Fa was aware of the cold, sinister smile that touched her lips.

"Pao Hsien."

*****

"We have to go talk to -- "

" -- The tailor. I know. She's a Jade Razor."

The other Angels nodded to each other as Fa identified their enemy.

The Jade Razors were a secret organization of foul necromancers and power-hungry warlords, dedicated to spreading chaos and terror throughout the realm of the Goddess. The Angels had crossed paths with this society many times in the past, and rooting out nests of these conspirators was a common task for them.

Shan shrugged.

"Let's go get her."

Fa looked over the others.

"No doubt she's prepared for us. She knows who we are. She must have a plan."

Wei-Yong yawned.

"We've got Shan. Let's go."

*****

Every time the massive loom finished a line, the frames clacked together with a shattering rattle of wood and thread. Nobody sat in front of the machine as it whirred and clattered, and yet the shuttle flew back and forth between the ratcheting threads, producing a broad roll of beautiful silk all on its own.

Nothing else moved in the richly appointed chambers of the house. Tapestries hung, motionless. Huge spools of vari-coloured thread stood in silent rows. Even the hydrangea bushes in the garden seemed frozen in place.

The woman sat at an embroidery table, staring at the unfinished pattern. Dozens of needles, each threaded with a different colour, sat at the ready on racks beside her. Before her chair five dark-clad men knelt, swords held before them, point-first on the hardwood floor.

She spoke.

"They are coming."


----------



## barsoomcore

Never thought the Stewardesses would be getting lonely...


----------



## shilsen

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Never thought the Stewardesses would be getting lonely...



 Alas, some of us humble fans forget to post a response sometimes. Mea culpa!

Oh yeah - GO ANGELS!


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## Thornir Alekeg

Well, thanks to the new speedy server, I am checking out more story hours.  I just caught up with this one, and I am really impressed (as I am with many of the story hours posted here).  

One note: you may want to edit the link to the current part of the story in your first post.  Now that 40 posts are the norm, there is no longer a page seven to jump to, it is now page four, so the link does not work.


----------



## barsoomcore

Thornir Alekeg said:
			
		

> you may want to edit the link to the current part of the story in your first post.  Now that 40 posts are the norm, there is no longer a page seven to jump to, it is now page four, so the link does not work.



Thanks! I've done that. Good catch.

And thanks for the compliment. You too, shilsen. Appreciate it.


----------



## barsoomcore

"She knows we're coming. Maybe this isn't such a great idea."

Ming-Wa regarded the front door of Pao Hsien's house with gnawing uncertainty. The sun was low in the sky, shining up the length of the mountain valley and casting long shadows across the steep tiled rooftops of Hsiao-pei-ho. Li Fa studied the estate wall before them, seeking for traces of the Shadow Realm that would reveal the presence of sorcery.

"There's no point in trying to trick her," said Fa, "She knows we have to come after her. Anything we try will just let her spend more time setting up. Besides, we have Shan."

They'd spent the afternoon in funeral services for the unfortunate children who'd been subjected to necromantic rites by the Jade Razors. Of course the families were devastated but their children had been missing for days and they had in many cases already assumed the worst. The Goddess' love and guarantee of peace for their souls had eased some portion of their grief, but the town of Hsiao-pei-ho would be a long time healing the terrible betrayal of Pao Hsien.

Fa pounded on the door.

"Pao Hsien! Open up in the name of the Goddess! You will answer for your crimes! Open up!"

The door swung open.

Inside, the click and clatter of a loom underlay the metallic ring of swords clearing their sheaths. A woman laughed.

"It is not I who will answer, misguided fools."

*****

"Hold still, Shan. I can't reach it."

Wei-Yong scrabbled against the high wall at the rear of the estate, trying to grab hold of the top to pull herself over.

"Stretch those skinny legs, girl."

Shan watched with amusement as Wei-Yong grunted and at last got a hold on the top of the wall. She started hauling herself upwards but was unable to make any progress.

"Shan? A little help?"

Chuckling, Shan reached up, planted both of her hands on her friend's backside and shoved.

Wei-Yong shot up into the air and nearly vaulted the wall accidentally. She managed to cling to the narrow top and glared down at the big woman below. Shan was still chuckling. Wei-Yong sneered.

"Let's see you get up here any easier."

Shan backed off across the alley to get a bit of a run at the wall. She paused and whispered up to Wei-Yong.

"Anything going on in there?"

Wei-Yong peered into the dark garden behind the house.

"No, I... Wait, yeah. She's sitting on the verandah out back. She's doing embroidery or something."

"Does she see you?"

"No way. She's... The front door's opening. I can see Fa and Ming-Wa. Shan! There's a whole bunch of swordsmen! She's standing, she. Uh oh."

Shan froze, suddenly frantic with worry.

"What is it?"

"She saw me. She-- "

Wei-Yong's words exploded in a wild shriek as the lanky woman was torn bodily from the top of the wall and sailed right over Shan's head. She plowed straight through the ramshackle wall behind Shan and there was a loud, wince-inducing series of thunks, yelps, crashes and thumps. And then a groan.

Shan stood perfectly still for a second.

"Wei-Yong? Are you okay?"

"Oh, yeah. Fine. I'm just going to lie here for a while. Go get her, Shan. Ouch."

Shan needed no further encouragement. She charged the wall and with a powerful leap, pulled herself to the top and balanced there for just a second, taking in the scene within.

Pao Hsien stood by an embroidery rack, watching the interior of her house where Shan could see Fa raising her hands to cast a spell. Five or six black-clad swordsmen lunged towards the sorceress.

Pao Hsien was laughing.

*****

Ming-Wa and Fa stepped into the house. The interior was broad, just one large room that opened onto the garden beyond. Pao Hsien sat, smiling at them as her sword-wielding minions advanced on the two women.

Long-practiced in working together, Ming-Wa and Fa split up, the older woman heading straight towards Pao Hsien while Ming-Wa made a wide circle around to the left. Fa looked across the garden to where Wei-Yong suddenly appeared. Everything seemed frozen for a second.

Pao Hsien stood and threw out a hand towards Wei-Yong, who disappeared as if yanked backwards out of sight.

"Your Goddess is a demon. A foul creature come to torture and feed on the innocent. She is an abomination, and the Jade Razors will not rest until she is destroyed."

Furious, Ming-Wa pointed an accusing finger.

"You are the abomination! You torture and murder! Innocent children tortured to death, and you dare even SPEAK of the Goddess!"

The young woman lifted her hands and raised her face to the roof above.

"Goddess, in your name I swear this heretic shall die. Tonight."

Her blazing eyes turned to Pao Hsien.

"Die!"

The room exploded in a flurry of action. Five swords whirled in a wild pattern around Fa, who raised her hands and, in a sudden tangle of dark tendrils, chains sprung out of the floor, showering splinters in all directions and wrapping around her attackers.

Ming-Wa sent her mind's searing power into the memories of the blasphemous tailor, bringing forth images of suffering and agony to torture her enemy with. Pao Hsien screamed.

The tailor's hands flew and a half-dozen needles, each threaded with a different colour, shot through the air to drill into Li Fa's body, penetrating her wrists and ankles. With a wild laugh, Pao Hsien yanked on the threads and Fa's body jerked and twisted like a puppet's.

Ming-Wa stared in horror. She'd heard of such things, a secret order of priestesses. The Sisterhood of the Gilded Curtain.

Somehow, her outrage managed to increase. The swordsmen were shrieking as Fa's chains shrank around them, bones snapping and skin tearing, and now Fa's frantic, terrified voice rose above all the others in a scream of terror as her body responding entirely to Pao Hsien's direction.

Wei-Yong had disappeared without a trace and there was no sign of Shan. Li Fa stepped awkwardly towards where Ming-Wa stood.

"Get out, Ming-Wa. Save yourself."

Fa gasped as Pao Hsien yanked on the threads and twisted her body painfully. The tailor and Ming-Wa regarded each other.

"Your Goddess, Ming-Wa, brings nothing but terror and death. Even if you strike me down here, you will come to see, as I have, that you serve the greater darkness."

"Greater than the murder and torture of children? You dog!"

"Yes, Ming-Wa. Greater than I. The Goddess is evil beyond what you can conceive. She will consume us all."

"You lie."

"You'll never know, Zheng Ming-Wa. You will die now and your Goddess shall fall. Tianguo will be free."

"No."

Ming-Wa stood, feet planted, fists clenched at her side, ignoring Li Fa as her helpless friend came lurching towards her. With a shudder of her slender body, Ming-Wa again sent her mind stabbing deep into Pao Hsien's memories.

The tailor fell to her knees, groaning, as Ming-Wa's will forced agony upon agony into her consciousness.

"You carry the darkness within you, Pao Hsien. With your own memories I will destroy you."

The tailor let go of Fa's threads and reached out towards the spools beside her. More needles glinted there.

"It is I who will destroy you, foolish girl."

"If there's any destroying to be done, I'll take care of that."

Pao Hsien looked up in disbelief as Shan raised her sword.

Different cuts served different purposes. Shan was a master of the sword and knew how to cut using only her wrists, for when the enemy was too close for proper handling. She could cut using her arms and shoulders, when caught in a sitting position. For more powerful cuts, of course, her cuts used the abdomen, the hips, and even the legs to drive her sword in an irresistible arc through her enemy's body.

When she cut Pao Hsien completely in half, Shan had the distinct sensation that even her toes were helping to propel her sword.

There was a quick spray of blood, and Shan stood there, frozen, her sword pointing out to her left, as to her right, Pao Hsien gasped, clutched at her stomach, and fell to the floor in two pieces and a flopping pile of entrails.

For a couple of seconds, nobody moved. Then Shan produced a cloth and wiped it down the length of her sword. Fa collapsed to the floor, blood pouring from the wounds at her limbs.

Shan took a step towards Ming-Wa, but the look on her friend's face stopped her. At first she looked down at herself, but realised that Ming-Wa was looking past her.

Behind her.

A woman's voice chuckled. Not Pao Hsien. Dark, deep and hoarse, as though coming up from some deep underground tomb.

"Shan! Behind you!"

The big woman started to whirl when a sudden searing pain tore at her kidneys. Shan looked down to see well over a foot of steel, a broad gleaming blade, protruding from her front. As she watched, three trickles of blood made their way down the blade.

She tried to speak and her mouth filled with blood. She realised she was on her knees, shuddering uncontrollably. A sick, abbattoir noise and the blade withdrew with a sudden gout of blood. Shan crashed to the floor next to the corpse of Pao Hsien. She'd never even seen her attacker.

Ming-Wa had. And now she stared, aghast, at her two friends motionless around her, and at the tall, freakishly armoured figure standing before her.

It was a woman, well over six feet tall, in baroque armour detailed to resemble demonic features, with points and spines jutting out from out all over. She held a mammoth two-handed blade in her hands. The lower half of the blade was dark with Shan's blood.

She'd risen as Ming-Wa had watched from the shadow of Pao Hsien's corpse, as though rising from a trapdoor in the floor, and without hesitation had rammed her huge sword right through Shan's body.

Now the strongest, most durable woman Ming-Wa had ever known lay bleeding and helpless at her feet, struck down with one blow.

The strange woman smiled.

"Thank you for striking down my mistress. With your deaths I will be free of this servitude."

"What?"

Shan moaned quietly. Ming-Wa backed away several quick steps and threw her mind's power into tearing apart the creature's memories.

The smile disappeared and the shadowy woman charged forward.

*****

Wei-Yong groaned. She lay in a cloud of dust, tangled among debris and what looked like the remains of a bed frame. It had been as though a giant hand had swatted her off the top of the wall like she might knock aside a mouse. She groaned again, and set about untangling herself.

She could hear shouts and screams and applied herself more energetically. Within moments she stood, looking around at the interior of some kind of storeroom. A door creaked open and a wide-eyed face peered in. Wei-Yong smiled.

"Sorry about the noise. We're trying to kill the tailor next door. Excuse me."

She pushed past the startled homeowner and raced back across the alley. This time, she was able to leap up and pull herself over the wall without help.

Her shock at the scene beyond didn't stop her from jumping down into the garden and racing for her fallen friend.

"Shan! Shan!"

Ignoring everything else, Wei-Yong checked her friend frantically. Shan had suffered a terrible wound and was losing blood in a terrible flow. Wei-Yong got her lying flat and applied a tight bandage to staunch as much of the bleeding as she could, applying some unguents she had and providing the wounded woman with a sip of water. She looked over where the strange armoured woman advanced on Ming-Wa.

Her bow came up and Wei-Yong sent a rain of arrows punching through the bizarre armour. The swordswoman turned and charged her.

Ming-Wa followed as Wei-Yong scrambled back, dodging the lightning swings of the shadowy woman's blade. Again Ming-Wa reached out with her mind, but she couldn't find a strong hold on the creature's memories. Only vague images came up to her, indistinct and wavering.

The huge sword licked out and caught Wei-Yong across her back. Ming-Wa cried out as Wei-Yong shrieked and threw herself to the floor. Blood was everywhere as the three women ran across the house, dodging corpses and torn floorboards.

Too late Ming-Wa realised the woman had spun and now it was her turn to throw herself to the floor as that silvery blade buzzed overhead. For a second Ming-Wa thought she'd dodged the attack, but a wicked reverse cut found her unprepared and steel bit at Ming-Wa's hip.

She felt the blade strike home against her, bang off her pelvic bone and tear free, sending blood spraying with a hiss and a spatter on the floor. Unable to stand, Ming-Wa crashed down, screaming in agony. She heard Wei-Yong curse and the twang of her bow, arrows thudding home, and she flipped over onto her back, ignoring the hot slick pain in her hip.

The swordswoman had turned away from her and now advanced again on Wei-Yong, who looked calm and unruffled as she sent arrow after arrow buzzing into her enemy's body. The metallic ring as each arrowhead penetrated the armour plates was for a second the loudest sound in the room.

Ming-Wa put pain and the fear of death from her mind. She reached out again, taking hold of the shadowy woman's mind. She tore at the memories within, searching for pain and agony that she could call forth to destroy her foe.

"Goddess preserve us. Goddess preserve us. Goddess preserve us."

The woman's mind was strange, murky, and Ming-Wa felt a touch of madness enter her as she clawed at insubstantial shreds of reason. Somewhere in here lurked pain. Fear. Weakness.

Wei-Yong scrambled backwards. She started hurling curses at her implacable enemy, imitating Shan's creative obscenities as best she could.

"Suck on Her Holy..."

Ming-Wa found what she was looking for. A core of memory, carefully shielded. She took hold with her mind and yanked. And yanked again. And rubbed that ancient pain in this creature's mental face.

The sword fell to the floor with an unnaturally heavy clunk. The woman didn't scream as Pao Hsien had. She turned to Ming-Wa and, shaking, removed her helmet.

Ming-Wa's breath caught. Before her stood a beautiful young woman, pale and with huge black eyes so full of misery and suffering the Angel felt horrified at what she'd done.

"Thank you. It is over."

The woman collapsed in a clatter of metal, and then vanished as shadowy arms seemed to reach out of the floor and drag her straight down.

Ming-Wa and Wei-Yong stared at each other over the empty space where the woman had fallen. Ming-Wa managed to catch enough breath to speak.

"You're just not as good at swearing as Shan."

"Practice."

*****

Bandaged, exhausted, but standing on their own, the Angels watched as Pao Hsien's house burned. The townspeople cheered, vindictive and furious in their grief, but the Angels were silent.

Ming-Wa remembered the words of Pao Hsien, and, to her own shame, she felt the stirrings of doubt.

Fa broke the silence. Her voice was hushed, lacking its usual commanding tone.

"We need to know more about the Jade Razors. We got lucky this time."

Shan remembered looking down at the floor and knowing, with awful certainty, that she was about to die. She swallowed and looked over at Fa.

"We need to rest, Fa. None of us is going anywhere soon."

Wei-Yong didn't speak. She stared at the fire, ignoring the others, her usually cheerful face drawn and tight.

Ming-Wa took a deep breath.

"Goddess preserve us."

"Goddess preserve us."

"Goddess preserve us."

The fire roared higher.


----------



## shilsen

What? No chase scene AND no dinosaurs? You're slipping up, BC 

Oh yeah - one more thing. Great update


----------



## Thornir Alekeg

I found myself holding my breath as Ming-Wa and Wei-Yong battled the swordswoman.


----------



## barsoomcore

Thanks, guys! It was a GREAT final battle, with everyone crowding around to witness each other's dice rolls and cheering or groaning at the result.

Fa gets a great spell casting roll and the mooks are pinned! Hurrah!

Fa fails her Will save and becomes a puppet! Oh no!

Shan kills Pao Hsien in ONE BLOW! Spectacular!

The umbral warrior (for such she was, sort of) sends Shan to (no kidding) -7 hit points in one blow! Yikes!

(actually it was two blows in one full attack, both criticals, VERY unpleasant for poor Shan)

Wei-Yong stabilizes Shan! Phew!

Umbral Warrior nearly kills Wei-Yong! Help!

Ming-Wa keeps blowing her damage on _recall agony_! No!

Ming-Wa gets a SPECTACULAR damage roll on _recall agony_! The umbral warrior dies at last! Everyone jumps up and down, yelling and hooting and hollering and hugging each other!

They were SO pumped by it all.


----------



## BSF

Wow, that is an intense update.  There isn't quite the same feeling of victory to this one.  More like the Angels are lifting up the edge of something much larger.  It will be interesting to see where this goes.


----------



## Desdichado

BardStephenFox said:
			
		

> There isn't quite the same feeling of victory to this one.  More like the Angels are lifting up the edge of something much larger.



I think that's one of barsoomcore's strengths as a GM (as interpreted through Storyhours, naturally.  Although if I've ever in Vancouver with a few evenings to kill, a romp on the surface of Barsoom would sure be fun...)


----------



## BSF

Agreed!  I know he and I share some of the same ideas on story design for a game.  But it is cool to read how somebody else does it so you can learn.


----------



## barsoomcore

Joshua Dyal said:
			
		

> Although if I've ever in Vancouver with a few evenings to kill, a romp on the surface of Barsoom would sure be fun...)



I notice you refrained from saying, "A romp with a quartet of flight attendants..."

 

But actually, Barsoom HAS had a tradition of "Guest Appearances" by folks who are in town for a day and run an NPC for a night. There's always a couple of kooky characters hanging around with our heroes, it seems...


----------



## Desdichado

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> I notice you refrained from saying, "A romp with a quartet of flight attendants..."



There's always the remote chance my wife will be kidnapped by aliens, experimented upon, come back as a gamer, read ENWorld, stumble onto that comment and cause me more grief than it's worth to say I'd like a romp with a quartet of flight attendents with French accents.

By the way, do they play in uniform?


----------



## barsoomcore

Joshua Dyal said:
			
		

> By the way, do they play in uniform?



No, they play _out_ of uniform.


IYKWIMAITYD


----------



## Thornir Alekeg

Hmm, I certainly could use some wild stewerdess action.  Will there be any updates soon?  Searching for other sites with wild stewerdess action leads to too many non-grandma friendly sites - not suitable for work or for home.


----------



## Kenshiru

*More More More Wild Stewardess Action!*

Hi barsoomcore,

Just wanted to add my encouragement to the other posters here and say thanks for sharing the adventures of the Angels. I'm really enjoying your Story Hour. It's a great read and I'm looking forward to future installments. Hope the next one is soon.

PS
Think I'll go take a look at your Barsoom Tales Story Hour now. Coz if it's as entertaining as this I don't want to miss it!


----------



## barsoomcore

No new games are scheduled for the charming ladies, I'm afraid. Though there was talk of a 1960's spy-themed kind of game.

Haven't had time to put it together yet, unfortunately.


----------



## Len

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> No new games are scheduled for the charming ladies, I'm afraid.



Well, that explains that.


----------



## Desdichado

Thornir Alekeg said:
			
		

> Hmm, I certainly could use some wild stewerdess action.



Couldn't we all, Thornir.  Couldn't we all.

So, if this one is done (for good?) are we ever going to see how this connects to the main Barsoom campaign in time and place?


----------



## barsoomcore

Dunno for sure -- I'd LIKE to run another, but it starts to smack of railroadiness since I ALREADY know how all this turns out, sort of. And just saying, "Okay, alternate universe" just isn't all that much fun, really.

But we'll see. There is room for stuff to happen, for sure. And I really love these characters. And writing this Story Hour, not to mention.

But assuming I EVER get Barsoom Season Two off the ground, that will clear up the connections, I think.


----------



## barsoomcore

Hey stewardess fans!

Fret not! Rather rejoice! For further adventures are soon to be posted!

All-new hi-jinks with Li Fa, Tong Shan, Muen Wei-Yong and Zheng Ming-Wa as they square off against giant worms, deformed monstrosities and cute actors! Will Wei-Yong ever find a guy tall enough? Will Ming-Wa ever loosen up enough to enjoy life? Will Li Fa's hideous sorcery eventually destroy all that she loves? Will Shan ever find enough to eat?

Tune in -- same time, same butt-kicking channel!


----------



## shilsen

*pulls up a seat and settles down with a bowl of popcorn*


----------



## rbingham2000

*puts on the shades and kicks back to enjoy the show*


----------



## barsoomcore

And here begins the next adventure of our fair heroines! Thrill to the chills of _And Madness Followed_!


CHAPTER ONE

Four figures paused on the road, looking up between the straggling mountain pines at the cluster of houses and shops that formed the remote village of Hu-shih-tai. On all sides tall peaks rose into the clear sky, as disinterested as stone idols of some forgotten religion. Thin trails of smoke rose from a couple of houses, evidence of habitation, but otherwise there was no sign of life.

The tallest of the four, lanky Muen Wei-Yong in her hunter's furs, shook her head. A lean, nervous wolf pushed its muzzle against her hip

"I don't like this. That's a quiet village."

The shortest among them, Zheng Ming-Wa, pulled the furred collar of her modest robe tight around her throat and set her small mouth in a stern expression.

"Maybe they're praying to the Goddess."

Tong Shan snorted. She was a broad-shouldered, heavy-set woman wearing battle-beaten armour with intense dark eyes set deeply in a good-humoured face. Her sword leapt into her hands.

"Or maybe they've been eaten by some horrible demon monster that's going to jump out at us any second."

Wei-Yong grinned, unfazed by her friend's suggestion.

"You're just in a bad mood because you're hung over. And that boy in Leng-tzu-po liked me better than you."

"He did not. Shut up. I say monsters."

"Yeah, probably monsters."

The fourth woman, who hadn't yet spoken, turned her grave face to her friends. This was Li Fa, whose simple grey robe belied her status as the leader of the group. She gestured up the road.

"Whatever has happened, it is our duty to investigate. Wan-Chen, the merchant, may be here somewhere, and without his information, we will not know our next move against Sung Li-Ling."

Shan sulked.

"Let Wei-Yong go first, she's so popular."

Slowly, still four abreast, the women moved up the road into the village. As they passed the outlying houses, evidence of trouble began to appear: doors torn off their hinges, bloodstains and furniture thrown into the streets. It appeared as though a battle had been fought here, but there were no bodies lying strewn about, no wailing injured or dazed survivors. The village lay empty.

Ming-Wa stepped delicately around a drying pool of gore.

"Where are we supposed to meet Wan-Chen?"

Fa pointed to a wide, two-story establishment with latticed windows all around, open on the ground floor and set with tables and chairs.

"The teahouse there."

She frowned.

"I think I see people in there."

Wei-Yong had been studying some tracks and stood at Fa's comment, turning to peer at the teahouse several blocks up the street.

"You're right. It's packed in there."

Shan whirled her sword a few times.

"Anyone alive or are they all dead already?"

"Well, they're moving."

"That doesn't tell us much."

Ming-Wa started up the street.

"I could use a cup of tea. Maybe we can sit on the verandah and see if this Wan-Chen is around."

All four women started when a voice suddenly called out to them, honeyed and smirking.

"Come join us, friends. Come. Join us."

Ming-Wa stopped and looked back at her friends. Shan nodded at her.

"Monsters. I don't think you're going to get any tea."

"Come and join us..."

Without further words the women lined up once again and began their slow way up the street, the early morning sun casting long shadows ahead of them. Shan made a few more passes with her sword. Wei-Yong laid an arrow across her bow, another long shaft gripped between the fingers of her drawing hand, ready to leap onto the string once the first had flown. Ming-Wa touched the tiny amulet she wore, praying to the Goddess in a constant whispering stream. Fa stalked in silence, observing the village around her as they walked up the low rise towards the teahouse.

Fa spoke quietly, her heavy voice confident and assured.

"Shan, Wei-Yong, be ready for their assault. Ming-Wa and I will keep an eye out for the ringleaders."

Shan observed the figures within the dark confines of the teahouse shift and rise, and slid her gaze sideways to Wei-Yong.

"He only gave you that bracelet because he thought you were starving. You're too skinny, you know. Boys don't like that bony look."

"Focus, Shan. Monsters, remember?"

The big woman grumbled but turned her attention back to the teahouse. Just in time, it turned out, for just at that moment the building suddenly exploded in activity. Half-a-dozen figures leapt out at them, some over tables on the verandah, some crashing through the lattices above and plunging down to the street, all laughing with confident bloodthirsty glee.

Shan shrugged. She heard Wei-Yong's bow buzz once, twice, three times, and three of the figures leaping from above crashed limply to the street and lay still. The swordswoman, unsurprised by this display of her friend's skill and speed, simply rumbled into the midst of the attackers still approaching.

Fa drew back at the sight of their assailants. They were terrible to behold, foul twisted figures with strangely gnarled limbs, their skin blistered and pocked, their eyes rolling yellow and wild in their heads. Teeth like ill-fitted tusks and greasy hair in thick ropes completed their unnatural appearance, and yet they wore tatters of tunics and robes like ordinary villagers.

Four circled Shan and leapt at her, grinning madly.

Shan struck once, then twice. Each arc of her sword cut brutal slashing tears across two of her opponents, and they all fell backwards in gurgling sprays of blood. Fa, seeing the situation here well in hand, rushed forwards into the teahouse to see who remained.

She stopped in the high-ceilinged building, looking up at the balcony overhead. Figures crowded the rails, and yet more emerged from the gloom of the teahouse's depths, surrounding her.

"Oh."

Her retreat blocked, Fa whirled, but before she could take action, one of the figures around her charged forward and caught her arm with the tines of a pitchfork. Fa yelled in pain and tried to pull away, but another grabbed her and she felt weight closing in on her from all sides. Every time she tried to concentrate to begin a spell, a fist would land on her or a booted foot would kick her and she'd stumble aside, throwing aside tables and chairs as she reeled, desperate to avoid reaching hands, and now, she saw, claws and talons as voices chittered and rose up high, too high and savage for human throats. Fa felt panic burgeoning in her heart and cried out, flailing.

Then came an all-too-human series of oaths and the weight fell back from her, blood splashing on her face and a familiar bulky shape pushing up beside her.

"...crush you under Her Round Little Behind, you worthless freaks!"

Shan grabbed Fa and shook her once.

"That's what you get with your fancy magic. No need for that here."

Fa, still shaking with panic, tore herself free.

"That's enough, Shan. I know what I'm doing."

She felt Shadow's dark kiss begin to rise up in her, and forced herself to calm down. Sorcery provided a constant temptation to rage and violence, and she knew that if she did not maintain control of her temper, she might easily slay her friends in her black fury. And things weren't that bad here; Shan and Wei-Yong could easily deal with the blood-crazed but apparently ineffectual creatures that had taken over the teahouse. There was no need to get worried.

She looked up at a sudden movement overhead; and then a giant worm ate her.


----------



## shilsen

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> She looked up at a sudden movement overhead; and then a giant worm ate her.






Don't you just hate when that happens?


----------



## Len

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> and then a giant worm ate her.



Man, being a stewardess is tougher than I thought.


----------



## barsoomcore

CHAPTER TWO

*****

From Shan's point of view, it was as though a great wriggling pillar of flesh had suddenly descended upon her friend, consuming her entirely even as it spilled into the teahouse, knocking aside tables and splintering railings as its great obscene bulk writhed and coiled in horrible twists and undulations.

The thing oozed slime and stank horribly of fetid corruption. Shan coughed and shook her head, then swung her blade at it.

Ordinarily a stroke from Shan's sword was enough to make just about anything reconsider its actions, but in this case her foot planted on a slippery portion of one of her late foes, and as she tried to recover her balance her blade went wide.

Shan crashed down to the floorboards with a spectacular explosion of noise and clattering armour. Her curses rose in volume and invention.

Wei-Yong and Ming-Wa, still out in the street, stared in shock at the abrupt appearance of a gigantic worm. The taller woman recovered first, seeing a sudden movement behind Shan in the teahouse. She drew back an arrow and let fly, the shaft buzzing just past Shan's head to strike the disfigured attacker directly between its bloodshot eyes. It pitched backward and disappeared as Shan looked over curiously.

Ming-Wa reached out with one hand.

"I just wanted a cup of tea."

She sent her mind questing forward, found a sort of psychic handle on the worm's simple mind, and wrenched it. HUNGER. RAGE. She hung on in the face of its unthinking need and hunger. The disgusting thing heaved and rippled and Fa shot out of its maw, crashing into tables and covered in thick slime.

Fa had experienced a bad few seconds inside the worm's gullet. Crushing, stifling, slick muscles pressing against her, the rank stench of the thing and its gruesome fluid gushing all over her, burning like acid and as foul as liquid manure, she flailed frantic and terrified until suddenly the world pitched and squeezed and she was free, stumbling around the jumbled furniture and limp bodies that lay scattered about.

"I don't feel good."

Shan glared at her dazed friend.

"I'm going to give you such ."

Fa was about to reply when the great worm reared up and lunged at Shan. Its buzzsaw mouth closed on the big woman's arm, nearly wrenching it off with a sudden writhing heave. Shan bellowed and cut at it again, wielding her sword one-handed. Vaguely she heard Ming-Wa crying out from the street.

"We had a plan!"

Shan grunted as she slashed again, deep cuts opening in the creature's side. It still had a hold of her arm and now yanked her back and forth through the already-disordered furntiure, table legs splintering and chairs flying as her armoured bulk plowed helplessly from side to side.

"Yeah, and now it's time for the big girls to go to work."

Ming-Wa, looking for a way in that didn't involve trying to pass thrashing coils of angry giant worm, raced around to the back of the teahouse. An untouched back door beckoned and she started forward. Wei-Yong's head turned back and forth, alternating between aiming shots at the worm and keeping an eye on the frail young woman going off by herself.

The worm, bristling now with Wei-Yong's arrows and so chopped up by Shan's sword that it resembled a sausage sliced for roasting, at last released its hold on the woman's arm and sank down in a limp mass. Shan stared, catching her breath, and then stumbled backwards as it burst open, spraying foulness in all directions. The slime plastered her, oozing into her armour and dripping down her face, all over her burning and searing. She retched and tried to wipe her eyes clear.

Something struck her from the side and she whirled, only to find Fa, eyes blazing, lunging at her.

"This is all your fault! You moron!"

Shan frowned, then pushed Fa in the face. Hard.

"Sit down."

She looked up at the sound of movement above.

"And stay here."

Her armour clattered as she charged up the stairs to the balcony. Fa picked up a chair and smashed it, incoherent in her panic- and sorcery-edged rage.

Ming-Wa approached the door. She could hear yelling and crashing from inside still, so she knew the battle wasn't over. Pausing, she reached forth cautiously with her mental senses, seeking any minds that might reveal hiding foes.

HUNGER. RAGE.

Startled, Ming-Wa reeled backwards just as the second worm came spilling out through the door, rippling and flailing towards her.

"Oh, no."

Shan came to a halt at the top of the stairs, facing another crowd of weirdly-deformed figures, lurching towards her with chuckling glee. Behind them stood one figure whose clothing seemed finer, rich merchant's robes.

"VWan-Chen?"

"No longer! Now we welcome the Dreaming City! Join us! Join us in our dreams! Join the Emperor of Dreams! His touch shall free you from Her deadly embrace! Li Ling has opened the way for us all!"

Weary, one arm nearly dislocated from the worm's frenzy, dripping with acidic ichor, Shan raised her voice to carry outside.

"The big girl could use a little help, folks. If nobody's too busy."

Wei-Yong didn't hear her friend's request; she was too busy firing arrow after arrow at the immense worm flopping and wriggling after Ming-Wa. Shan didn't wait in any event; rolling her big shoulders, the swordswoman plowed into her foes, her sword flipping about her quick snapping arcs. Hideously deformed figures shrieked as the razor-sharp edge slashed terrible wounds across bellies and faces and throats, and bodies fell back on all sides.

One figure was nimble enough to avoid the blade but not to avoid Shan's booted foot, which lashed out and slammed the creature backwards, through a railing to plunge down to the ground floor, where, before it could recover, Fa bludgeoned it repeatedly over the head with her staff, still swearing in her anger.

The worm outside, now prickly with feathered shafts, reared up and hurled itself forward in an effort to reach Ming-Wa, but the slender young woman leapt back just in time. The foul thing crashed to the street and lolled helplessly, collapsing on itself like a spent waterskin. Recalling how the one inside had reacted to death, Wei-Yong yanked her friend back just as the corpse exploded in a grayish-green eruption of reeking foulness.

Upstairs, Shan fended off chair legs, kitchen knives and other improvised weapons as the thing that wore the robes of Kong Wan-Chen urged its misshapen bodyguard forward, all the while chuckling and raving. Shan's left arm hung uselessly and she still wielded her long curved sword one-handed, slashing bloody arcs on all sides as she swore in frustration.

Sneering mouths hissed and snarled, clawlike hands scrabbled against her armour or fell twitching, severed from their parent arms. Shan planted her feet on the bloodslick planks and with a last desperate effort swept the remaining guards from before the gibbering, prancing thing.

"The Dreaming City comes! Revel in its glory!"

Shan glowered and then ripped her sword upwards in a blurring angle, catching the shrieking creature in its groin and tearing it open upwards. With flailing limbs the thing fell backwards and crashed through the lattice window behind it.

Wei-Yong, who had been pressing forward to investigate the stinking, dissolving corpse of the worm, jerked back in alarm as the still-convulsing Wan-Chen plunged into the morass of acid and bile. The torn creature wailed and hissed and at last expired. Wei-Yong looked up and nodded at her friend.

Shan stomped downstairs in exhausted numbness, looking up as Wei-Yong and Ming-Wa came around to the front of the teahouse. Fa squatted on the floor, investigating some board painted with black characters.

"You feeling a little less angry now?"

Fa shrugged.

"Sorry."

"It's okay. You're cute when you're angry."

Wei-Yong and Ming-Wa joined them.

"What is it, Fa?"

The sorceress stood up, straightening her dark robes.

"It's Dream Worlds writing. Symbols to attract and compel spirits." She looked around the gory interior of the now-destroyed teahouse. "Someone has channeled enough Dream Worlds energy here to twist every resident of this town into... those things."

Ming-Wa inhaled sharply. Her bright eyes flickered with worry.

"But to do so... such a ritual... the whole town would have had to participate."

Fa nodded. She held a scrap of cloth towards her friend.

"If these were the villagers, this cloak might hold some memories. Can you see what you find?"

Ming-Wa nodded and took the cloak, then led the others outside where the stink of death was not so overpowering. She knelt on the street with the cloak spread out before her, placing her hands spread wide upon the cloth.

The town before her wavered, then vanished in a sickening twist of vision and a sense of rushing forward. She saw a stage, richly decorated, with bright yellow curtains where capering figures spun and leapt as in the traditional style of Tianese theatre.

But something was wrong, horribly wrong. The audience watched in silence, without a single cough or whispered remark. Even the children in the crowd were motionless and utterly rapt. The performers recited lines of bizarre madness, but each senseless utterance deepened Ming-Wa's foreboding sense of horror.

The quality of the memory she explored was mercifully muddy, but she slowly felt a narrowing of focus within the unfortunate villager's mind, a drawing-down of mental veils until only the figures on the stage existed, only their words (or not even; they had descended to animal barks and hissing yowls) remained to be heard.

And then Ming-Wa witnessed a terrible unveiling, as though for a moment the stage become a rippling gateway out of which rolled a wave of hideous possibility, and as it flooded forward she saw the assembled villagers suddenly writhing and bulging in horrid transformations. Once every audience member had been consumed by the foul wave, she felt the energy suddenly go out of the performance and the gateway snapped shut. The narrow view of memory shuddered closed a heartbeat as all sentient thought dropped away.

Ming-Wa swayed back from the cloak and into the waiting arms of her friends. Unsteadily she got to her feet, looking around the village in wonder.

"Something happened here..."

Wei-Yong bit back a sarcastic response. Ming-Wa recovered herself and met Fa's stern gaze.

"I think Li Ling is trying to destroy the world. Goddess preserve us."

The other women nodded.

"Goddess preserve us."


----------



## shilsen

Excellent!

And see - Plato was right after all.


----------



## barsoomcore

shilsen said:
			
		

> Plato was right after all.



That poets are the downfall of civilization?


----------



## shilsen

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> That poets are the downfall of civilization?



 And specifically that theater makes you pick up bad habits


----------



## barsoomcore

CHAPTER THREE

*****

As it was obvious that Li Ling herself had left town, the four women left this ruined village and headed down the descending track that led to the next town, Mien-tsa-wing. Traces of their quarry's passage could be seen, at least by Wei-Yong, in the footprints and campsites left behind, but the four saw no sign of the renegade playwright, nor any further evidence of attempts to open some sort of portal to the Dream Worlds, that wild realm of twisting chaos and maddening inconsistency from which the spirits emerged.

That changed as they made their way into Mien-tsa-wing.

"The Lord Mayor! Please, rescue the Lord Mayor!"

Constable Peng clung to Wei-Yong's sleeve as the four women stood in the street, staring into the maelstrom that had erupted in the midst of this peaceful town.

Past the first houses and inside the city wall, fires burned uncontrollably, houses collapsing within with great crashing tumbles of tiles and timbers. Horrible cries rose from the center of the doomed town, not cries of anguish but strange, triumphant hoots and cackles, as though a wild party were taking place in the midst of the conflagration. 

Li Fa's quiet voice was enough to silence the constable's panic.

"What happened?"

He blubbered and pleaded. Fa slapped him.

"Have you seen Li Ling? The playwright? Has she been here?"

Startled by the question, Constable Peng stared. He shook himself and brushed quickly at his uniform.

"Yes, she was here only yesterday, to announce the production of her latest play. The theatre was... in..."

He pointed into the flames.

Li Fa sighed and looked over at her friends. They were all exhausted, weary and travel-worn.

"Stay here."

Shan patted the Constable's shoulder.

"And have some lunch waiting for us when we come back. I haven't eaten since yesterday."

The four women exchanged glances, nodded, and as one, turned and walked into the flaming town center. Wei-Yong's wolf, Mau Li, followed them, pressing close beside her mistress.

Li Fa drew on Shadow's power as they walked, and each of the women felt a curious exhilaration for just a second as her sorcery fell over them. Fa glared at them all.

"Until you touch one of them, they won't be able to see you. Make it count."

The heat from the burning houses was intense, but the broad street was clear down most of its length. There was no sign of life, though the flames seemed limited to the outer circle of buildings. As the women walked further, they left the worst of the fire behind them. Smoke poured out from under heavy roof tiles, but open flames were rare, and after a few blocks, even smoke became rare.

The triumphant cries, however, became louder and more disturbing. No human throat could produce such bestial noises. Shan grimaced.

"I wish they were just people. Fighting people is more fun."

Ming-Wa tsked.

Wei-Yong frowned, though not at her friend's observation.

"I think there is a people. I mean, a person. I hear somebody speaking Imperial, anyway."

Fa grunted.

"If these spirits have taken captives, rescuing them must be our first priority."

The women rounded a large restaurant, three stories high, and found themselves facing a large amphitheatre crowded with the same sort of bizarrely-twisted creatures they'd faced in Hu-shih-tai. Only more of them.

Many, many more of them. Hundreds filled the amphitheatre, leaping and twisting and giggling. For now, none of them seemed to notice the women. Mau Li whimpered and pressed even closer to Wei-Yong's long legs.

"Bless Her Holy Va--"

"Shut up, Shan."

"Hey Ming-Wa, do you think the Goddess shaves down there? I mean, seriously."

"Shan. Not now."

Ignoring Shan's nervous banter, Fa turned to Wei-Yong.

"Is there a human being amongst them?"

The tall woman squinted and tried to not look away from the loathsome things that capered and gibbered around the square in obscene glee. In the midst of them all, down where the amphitheatre seats reached the stage floor, stood a heavy-set man in official robes, waving his arms over his head and screeching.

"I think it's the Mayor. All we got to do now is go get him."

"Without bumping into any of those things? Are you kidding? It's impossible. Time to kill things."

Fa scowled.

"Not yet. So, Ming-Wa, it looks like she failed again. Li Ling."

The slender young woman stepped back as one of the creatures pranced by, sparing a glance for Mau Li but ignoring the women.

"Yes, thank the Goddess. Still not enough souls to create a permanent gate. The Goddess watches over us."

All four women whispered quick prayers to their beloved Goddess.

"Wei-Yong. Send Mau Li. Have her bring the Mayor to us."

The lanky archer took one look at Fa's face and made no protest. She sank to her knees and took the wolf's big shaggy head in her hands. The two stared at each for a moment, then the wolf sneezed and leapt into the crowd, barking furiously as it went.

Fa looked around and pointed out a storefront.

"There. We can bring him inside and make a stand there. Shan, Ming-Wa, you wait outside to seal off his exit. Wei-Yong, you're inside with me."

As usual in crisis, none of the women questioned Fa's sudden leadership. Shan and Ming-Wa took up positions to either side of the door while Fa led Wei-Yong inside. The interior of the store's ground floor was a shambles, goods and shelves strewn about all over, windows smashed out and the back door torn off.

"Maybe not the best place for a stand-off, Fa."

The older woman nodded and gestured to the single stairway that rose up from the center of the space.

"We can hold them off here. Call Mau Li."

Outside, Ming-Wa and Shan watched in increasing concern as Mau Li snapped at the Mayor's rotund, gesticulating figure. He turned to cuff her and she sprang away, and as he pursued her, she led him straight up the rows of seats to where Ming-Wa and Shan waited.

The Mayor's sudden movement was noticed by the capering creatures. They stopped to watch him as he broke into a flabby, disorganized run.

And slowly, with gathering speed, the creatures began to follow him.

Ming-Wa's eyes widened as over a hundred of these terrible creatures began thundering towards them. She was just about to turn and leap into the store when the Mayor flashed past, still in hot pursuit of Mau Li.

But with enough presence of mind to slam the door shut behind him.

"Oh, no."

Inside, the Mayor windmilled to a stop and Fa pointed.

"Wei-Yong. Grab him."

She whirled and rushed up the stairs just as the door behind the Mayor splintered open, revealing Shan's armoured figure. The big woman shook her head and turned around.

Ming-Wa had time for only one quick gasp as a massive gauntlet lunged out from the shattered door behind her, grabbed her securely by the braid at the back of her head, and yanked her backwards just before the flapping, squawking horde reached her. Protesting, she looked up to see Shan glowering down at her.

"Plans are over-rated. Time to kill things."

Fa called down from the top of the stairs.

"Not yet. Get the Mayor and Ming-Wa up here right now."

"I can get myse--"

Ming-Wa yelped as Shan tossed her over a shoulder, grabbed the Mayor and dragged both up the stairs in a few bounds. Wei-Yong chuckled at the sight.

"Wei-Yong. Get up on the roof. We need a way out."

Windows crashed and the sudden cacophony below told them the horrible things Li Ling's ritual had transformed the townsfolk into were rushing into the store beneath them.

Shan sighed and set her burden down.

"NOW it's time to kill things."

"Not yet. You go with Wei-Yong and get the Mayor out of here. Ming-Wa, too."

Fa headed down the stairs.

"I'll hold them."

"Fa."

"I'll hold them. Go."

Fa held her hands up in front of her as dark tendrils of Shadow's power writhed out from around her. She whispered, a reckless half-smile on her face as she descended the steps.

"Time to kill things."


----------



## barsoomcore

CHAPTER FOUR

*****

"Why does Fa get to have all the fun? I just want to kill something, by Her Perfect Backside. What does it take?"

Shan complained as she and Wei-Yong led Ming-Wa and the muttering, flailing, overweight Mayor up onto the roof of the store they'd taken shelter in. The Mayor's chubby fist connected with Wei-Yong's head yet again and she looked over at Ming-Wa.

"Ming, could you?"

The woman concentrated for a second and the Mayor went limp.

"Thank you."

The three women looked around. Wei-Yong pointed.

"That restaurant. We can break through the windows and go down the inside stairs, out a back door or something."

"What about Fa?"

"Either she's coming with us, or she's not, Shan. Let's go."

Below, the ground floor of the shop seethed with tentacles, pulsating mouths and weird flapping limbs on all sides. Fa stood half-way down the stairs, eyes closed as she concentrated on her calculations. Her brain soared and wound around itself in frantic precision, guiding the horrible power of Shadow as it negated reality in exactly the fashion she required of it.

The creatures below hesitated. Although they could not perceive Fa herself, the unwinding of Shadow's dark touch was unmistakeable and they drew back.

Their caution did them no good.

Fa's eyes snapped open and she threw out her hands. A sudden shooting wall of flame seared up all around her, a hollow pillar of fire with Fa at the center. Her hands flipped over, and the pillar suddenly expanded outwards, the wall of flame rolling over all the fiendish monsters crowded into the shop around her.

They shrieked and gibbered in sudden, short-lived panic, but they left behind only their blackened corpses. Those left beyond the range of the fire scampered back, but once the flames died down they pressed forward, cautiously, once again.

Fa swayed for a moment, swore once, and collapsed.

Up on the roof, Shan had reached one of the latticed windows of the restaurant that overlooked the shop and was industriously tearing it apart when with a loud smack she suddenly flew backwards to crash amidst the tiles.

Her oaths were numerical: the number of hairy, sweaty, grinning sailors she was going to make the Goddess satisfy after she was done here. Ming-Wa put her hands over her ears while Wei-Yong, trying not to laugh, strung her bow and looked to see what just done that to her friend.

It stood taller than a man, with two right hands, each of which held a massive battle-axe. Its left hand clung to the nearest pillar as it waved its weapons at Shan, gibbering the whole while.

"Well, so much for Fa's spell."

"It saw the window being demolished, Shan. It's inhuman, not stupid."

"Whatever. I'm killing it."

Shan charged, with predictable results. Wei-Yong nudged Ming-Wa.

"He got to scream. Last one didn't get to scream."

Ming-Wa nodded.

"She's slipping. Although the last one wasn't completely in half."

"Yeah. She-- "

Wei-Yong's sentence went unfinished as she caught sight of another pair of axes descending to where Shan stood, continuing to demolish the window. Her bow leapt up and two arrows on the string flew away.

One embedded itself in the upper right hand of the second axe-weilding creature.

The other arrow embedded itself in the lower.

His axes hadn't hit the ground before Shan had cut him in half, too.

"Okay, maybe she's not slipping."

A weary hand flopped out of the rooftop trap door and Fa groaned as she pulled herself up.

"Fa!"

"Had to collapse the stairs. Crawled up. Tired."

Wei-Yong and Ming-Wa helped their friend and followed the Mayor and Shan into the restaurant. More axe-weilding freaks attacked. Fa watched.

"You know, I thought she was kind of slipping but she seems pretty on her game today."

Bodies spilled guts and blood all over. Shan laughed.

"Yeah."

*****

"Thank you, thank you, thank you. Goddess be praised. Goddess be praised."

Ming-Wa accepted Constable Peng's thanks with grace.

"Yes. Goddess be praised. Now you understand there are more of these creatures, right? Let none escape alive."

"Yes, yes, of course. Understood. The militia are roused and we'll take care of things, now that you've returned the Mayor to us."

The women eyed the still-muttering, twitching figure of the town's official ruler, and refrained from comment.

"Where did Li Ling go?"

"On to Tieh Tung. It's about a day's ride down that valley. She left this morning."

The four women looked up at the noonday sun. Fa grinned at Shan.

"No lunch for you, dear. We'll need to ride if we're going to catch her."

Wei-Yong chuckled.

"Make sure you get the biggest horse in town."

Shan groaned.

"I can't save the world on an empty stomach, you know."

She brightened up as one of the townsfolk handed her a sack full of dumplings. They rode off in the direction Constable Peng had indicated, Shan chewing happily.

*****

There was no sign of chaos and horror in Tieh Tung, but a poster nailed to a shop wall had all of them moving faster.

"THE EMPEROR OF DREAMS! TONIGHT! THE NEW PLAY FROM SUNG LI LING, AT DUSK AT THE GREEN LOTUS THEATRE!"

Directions were found easily enough and with hearts steadily darkening they rode through narrow, crowded streets towards where the theatre stood.

"These Razors. These Jade Razors. Perhaps they aren't what we think."

"What do we think they are, Fa?"

Fa regarded Wei-Yong with some frustration.

"Opponents of the Goddess."

Ming-Wa gasped.

"But we know they are. Remember Pao Hsien in Hsiao-pei-ho? The obscenity beneath Her temple?"

"I remember, Ming-Wa. But think. What is Li Ling doing? Why try to expose the Living World to the chaos of the Dream Worlds? That doesn't make sense if they're trying to overthrow the Goddess."

Ming-Wa seethed. Shan shrugged.

"They're looking for Her hara."

"Her what?"

"Her hara. Her center. They're pulling on Her, to see what She'll defend. If they can destroy the world, She has to stop them. And then they know."

"Know what?"

Shan shrugged.

"How should I know? You guys are the smart ones."

Fa stared at her giant friend, then shook her head.

"Never mind. They ARE opponents of the Goddess."

"But you just said."

"I was wrong. Thank you, Shan."

"No problem. Hey, there it is. Do you think this place will be serving dinner?"

Inside, the theatre was packed, and only strange, horrible voices came over the crowd to tell the women that the show had begun. Ming-Wa clutched at her chest at the foul, yet somehow compelling voice, rasping and hissing at her. Shan pushed forward and they followed.

Few folks made any complaint at Shan's brusque passage through the crowd; most were content to move aside, staring forward in slack-jawed fascination, and those that retained sufficient awareness to notice took one look at her armoured bulk and decided against protesting.

"I'm thirsty. Can we get a beer? Hey, he's cute."

Shan had come around a thick pillar and at last stood where she could see the stage. She looked up at the performers and swayed for a second, entranced by the lead actor's considerable handsomeness. The stage whirled and flashed with colour and leaping figures, enacting some battle with stylized acrobatics, their brilliant costumes flickering and weaving through the air as they tumbled about.

A table nearby suddenly came free. Wei-Yong rolled her eyes and pushed Shan down into a chair. The others seated themselves.

"Come on, Shan. Come on."

"Village to village, no one to play with..."

Shan's voice trailed off. Wei-Yong frowned.

"Shan? Hey, come on."

She turned to study the actor who had so fascinated her friend.

"Oh. Pretty."

Wei-Yong swallowed, blushing, and sat down at the table with Shan, equally fascinated by the handsome young man.

Ming-Wa and Fa turned to look at the stage and both did exactly as Wei-Yong had. All four women sat, helpless and mute, as the play continued on its deadly course.

Backstage, the playwright, a thin, sallow woman in filthy robes, held a knife in her hands. Pointing towards her stomach. She convulsed and buried the blade in her own body. Spasming, she choked and fell to the floor.

"At last... The Emperor of Dreams comes forth... "


----------



## shilsen

It's always fun when the PCs are all fascinated, and the players can watch everything that's happening, without being able to respond to it in any way. 

Very nice!


----------



## barsoomcore

Yeah, it was kind of unexpected, actually. Four crappy Will saves later, the bad guys had the upper hand.


----------



## shilsen

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Yeah, it was kind of unexpected, actually. Four crappy Will saves later, the bad guys had the upper hand.



 Ah well -  happens! At least I hope you milked it for all it was worth


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## barsoomcore

Just wait and you'll see....


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## barsoomcore

CHAPTER FIVE

*****

"Now he comes forth! Witness his unveiling! The Emperor of Dreams comes before you all to free you from the chains of your Goddess. He comes!"

Upon the stage, facing the packed theatre, the lead actor pronounced the closing lines of Sung Li-Ling's new play. Above him, two other actors portraying spirit assistants of the Emperor writhed and pranced on the upper balcony, looking down upon the crowded theatre. By this point the theatre was filled with convulsing, jerking figures seated and standing around long tables running the length of the room.

Banners and lanterns hung from the crossbeams, swaying in the rising heat from the crowd. Even the waiters had paused, frozen in their steps by the unnatural waves of psychic energy flowing from the stage.

Slowly, at the center of the stage, directly behind the lead actor, a bizarre sort of hole began to emerge. A hole not in a wall or a panel, but simply floating in the air itself. A hole that tore at the minds and the sanity of all who looked upon it.

Even the minds of Li Fa, Zheng Ming-Wa, Muen Wei-Yong and Tong Shan, who sat, just as frozen as everyone else, staring in unthinking rapture at the obscene violation of reality taking place before them.

"He comes!"

The hole tore itself open further and a seething, scintillating wave of grotesque energy spilled out across the room. The four women at the back jerked as one, but only Ming-Wa shook herself and managed to look away from the horror unravelling reality itself before her.

The slender young woman looked around. She saw Mau Li, Wei-Yong's wolf, tugging on her mistress' hand in a desperate attempt to awaken the woman from the spell that descended upon them all. Human voices began to rise all around them, edging into the same sort of gutteral territory as the things they had fought in Mien-tsa-wing and Hu-shih-tsai. The entire audience was beginning to transform.

She turned to Fa, sitting beside her, and put forth her terrified mind into her friend's, seeking something, anything, she could use to retrieve the older woman from this terrible fate.

Fa shook, sputtered, and suddenly looked around in wild panic.

"What?"

Ming-Wa pointed at the stage. Fa shot out of her chair, black tendrils already licking up around her as she called upon sorcery's dark power.

The hole was no longer tearing itself open; it was being pulled apart by the limbs of some horrific, bloated thing that spilled forth, flailing tentacles and spraying slime in all directions. Screaming erupted on all sides as some folks sought to flee while others leapt upon their neighbors, savaging them with teeth and talons newly grown. The stink of blood and death and terror filled the cramped space.

Fa gestured and a thin needle sprang from her hand to impale the fearsome beast emerging from the hole, pinning it where it lay, half in and half out of the world. Ming-Wa sought a handle or a weakness in the thing's mind, but the patterns she encountered were wildly alien, brutal and incomprehensible, and again and again she found her mental grip slipping as the spirit's mind resisted her efforts.

"Goddess preserve us."

She saw Mau Li still snarling and tugging on Wei-Yong's hand, and with a flash of inspiration, she reached out with her mind to grab hold, not of another mind, but of the hook from which one of the lanterns depended, and flung the blazing box at Tong Shan's head.

The wooden lantern struck the big woman's helmet and shattered, spraying burning oil in all directions, but having no effect on Shan's continuing fasination with the actor on stage.

Ming-Wa nearly swore in frustration.

Fa groaned as the spirit beast tried to free itself from her transfixing needle, to pull itself fully into the Living World. She pressed her will against it, standing like a pillar amidst the chaos in the theatre as she focused her thought and her will on keeping the sorcerous needle exactly where it pinned the creature to reality.

Mau Li tasted her mistress' blood and the wolf, loyal beyond all else to her beloved mistress, gritted her teeth and bit down harder, her limited understanding sufficient to know that overcoming this terror was more important than her mistress' temporary comfort. Wei-Yong shook and cried out, yanking her hand free and staring down at Mau Li, who, overcome with remorse, lay sadly down at the woman's feet.

Wei-Yong looked around and blinked at the obscenity flapping and hissing up at the stage. Her bow was in her hand and arrows were flying down the length of the theatre before she even recognized where she was.

"The needle! Hit the needle!"

Even as Fa tried to tell Wei-Yong what to do, Ming-Wa, reasoning that the first lantern hadn't been enough, used her mind's strange powers to once again reach out and take hold of another lantern, sending it flying into her friend's head.

This time, the impact knocked Shan sideways, and she scrambled to her feet, looking around wildly.

"Her Big Holy Boobies. What's that?"

Fa cried out from where she stood.

"Shan, time to kill things!"

"Right."

Shan noticed the half-empty glass on the table.

"Beer. Good."

She drained the glass and drew her sword.

"Here we go."

Shan charged.

As her friend began building momentum, Wei-Yong saw the shimmering needle Fa was shouting about. It was only a couple of inches long, hanging in space just before the spirit creature, surrounded by flailing tentacles and hissing orifices. Wei-Yong drew, leapt up onto a table for a clearer view, whispered one quick prayer to the Goddess and let fly.

Shan jumped up onto one of the long tables that ran the length of the theatre, seeking a clear highway towards the stage. Wei-Yong's arrow buzzed past her head as she did so, and Shan watched as the blurring shaft flew straight and true, missing every one of the thing's limbs and striking the tiny silvery needle hanging right before it. Despite the sudden blast of white energy released by the impact, Shan made no attempt to alter her course or slow down.

Things needed killing, and the only strategy Shan ever used was to go where the things were and start killing.

At the impact of Wei-Yong's arrow with her needle, Fa grinned. The spirit creature was now completely within the Living World, and subject to all its laws. More darkness swirled up around her and the theatre floor at her feet erupted with a sudden roar. Heedless of the shrieking, frenzied mass of people between her and the stage, Fa gestured and the explosion roared down towards the stage, throwing bodies and furniture in all directions as it shot forwards.

Just before the stage, Shan heard the noise of Fa's earthbolt and saw that another figure had joined the two at the balcony overhead. This one wore a terrible, featureless mask that one clawlike hand rose to strip away.

"No you don't."

Shan had always wondered how much vertical she could get if she timed a jump to exactly coincide with Fa's spell.

Quite a bit, it turned out.

Wei-Yong gaped as her heavily-built friend, caught in the path of Fa's fearsome spell, suddenly seemed to bounce towards the ceiling. There was a tremendous explosion as the earthbolt reached the stage and sent timbers, curtain and flaming lanterns in all directions. The creature there blew apart in a reeking fountain of slime and gore, and riding the whole blasting wave was Shan, laughing savagely as she sailed up in front of the masked (and suddenly astonished) figure, and delivered a crippling blow with one swipe of her sword, only to plunge earthward immediately.

Even amidst the crashing and collapsing in the wake of Fa's spell, the heavy crunch of Shan hitting the floor was distinct.

"Ow. That was fun."

Dark whispering coils erupted around the figure in the mask. Fa tried to focus, to send her will into the other sorcerer's spell, but the frenzy of the theatre made it impossible to concentrate. She cried out a warning to her friend, but it was too late.

Shan looked up just as a mammoth pillar of searing flame rushed down on top of her.

"Shan!"

Wei-Yong, horrified at the sudden immolation of her friend, saw the two actors to either side of the figure in the mask leap out onto the heavy beams that ran the length of the theatre. One jumped down to the floor right where Shan stood, reeling, while the other raced towards where Fa tried to find a clear space in the midst of shrieking chaos. Wei-Yong spun, her bow horizontal, and dropped to one knee to give herself the angle she needed to pick off the running actor. He clutched at the feathered shaft projecting from his side and crashed to the floor. She kept spinning until she faced the stage again, and saw Shan straighten up, in the midst of charred furniture. The big woman swore.

"I think that burned my eyebrows right off."

Wei-Yong chuckled in relief at her friend's annoyed tone.

"Maybe it got rid of that little moustache, too."

Shan swore again and swung at the actor who'd dropped to the floor before her. He leaned back far enough to avoid the blade, but too far to avoid Shan's booted foot, which kicked out at his knees and knocked him to the floor. Shan raised her sword over her head and brought it down.

And missed. Her blade buried itself in the floorboards, and even Shan's tremendous strength could not pull the weapon free. She heaved once, then frowned as the actor leapt to his feet with a fierce yell.

A yell that cut off in a startled fashion when Shan head-butted him so viciously he flew backwards, spraying blood and stumbling right into the hole. THAT hole. He got out one quick shriek before some sort of horrible suction tore him backwards fast enough to rip him to pieces.

Ming-Wa had kept an eye on the upper stage and the second she saw the masked figure re-emerge, she reached out with both one hand and her mind.

The thing was no longer human, but it remembered being human. And it remembered pain. Ming-Wa reminded it.

Shan started as the body crashed into the burned floorboards beside her. The mask popped off and rattled off under the tables.

Although the theatre was still a swirling mass of humanity and ex-humanity struggling in fearsome throes of bloodletting, the four women relaxed, knowing their foe had at last been defeated.

Wei-Yong frowned.

"Should we maybe do something about that hole? It looks like it's getting bigger."

Fa and Ming-Wa both frowned. Ming-Wa narrowed her eyes.

"The Goddess will not permit such an abomination to exist."

She planted her feet and stretched out one hand, the other rising to her temple as her eyes closed and she opened her psychic senses.

The wild freakishness of that hole, that portal to the Dream Worlds, thrashed and battered at her like waves of howling brilliance. Ming-Wa swayed and gasped as the portal's growing power flung her will back and forth in its savage tide. Desperately she tried to gain a hold, to force the terrible all-consuming hunger backwards, but it defeated her. There was nothing to hold on to within its chaotic heart, and just the act of trying tore at Ming-Wa's sanity and identity. She felt herself fraying, coming apart in the hot, sick wind of the Dream Worlds, and threw herself back from it, dropping from her psychic trance and collapsing to the floor.

Fa and Wei-Yong and Shan rushed to their friend. Ming-Wa raised her spinning head and looked down at the stage. The hole had grown, and spread its multi-hued lips wide, tearing apart reality even as they looked upon it.

"Goddess... preserve us..."

Ming-Wa sagged, throwing herself into desperate prayer. She prayed to her beloved Goddess, the ruler of all the world, She who lived in splendour in the great celestial city of Zuyang, who watched over all her daughters with a stern but merciful eye, and she begged.

"Goddess. We need you. You must help us. This thing is beyond us and it will threaten all the world. Goddess. Your daughter of the Bended Knee begs you. Help us. Help all these people, Goddess. Stretch forth your infinite power and stop this obscenity. Please."

The women all fell back from Ming-Wa as a pale, extraordinarily beautiful face shimmered into being above her prostrate form.

"My daughter..."

"Goddess! Help us!"

The face turned from side to side slowly, smiling. Shan burst into tears at its perfection and began begging forgiveness for her many oaths and blasphemies.

"No, my beloved daughters. You must end this yourselves. I dare not. The mask. The mask is its connection to the Living World. Send back the mask. Hurry, my beloved daughters."

Fa leapt up and spotted the mask where it lay between an overturned chair and a ravaged, bloodstained corpse. She hurled it into the hole.

There was no sudden explosion or fireworks or thunderclap. The hole was simply gone, and that strange pressure in all their minds gone with it.

The beautiful face, dark eyes and red lips and white white white skin, faded away, still smiling. All four of the women wept, while around them people continued to die at the hands of horrid, twisted grotesqueries.

"Goddess... preserve us..."

*****

Fa picked at the bandage on her arm. She looked over at Shan, sprawled in a chair on the other side of the heavy table they sat at. The city square around them echoed with voices and excitement as the city watch finished cleaning up after Sung Li-Ling's final premiere. Stars glittered high overhead.

"So they sought Her hara. The Jade Razors. And She didn't show them. She showed us how to stop them, and we did it. They did not provoke Her. They failed."

Shan nodded and drank down her glass of beer before replying.

"Or else we are Her hara. And now they know. So they'll kill us."

She grinned. Wei-Yong grabbed her friend's broad shoulder and tugged.

"Come on, Shan, enough talk about killing. When's the last time we were in a city this big? Let's get drunk and you can beat up some boys."

"City boys."

Shan's eyes lit up and she rose to join her friend.

Fa looked over at Ming-Wa who was watching Shan and Wei-Yong with her usual disapproval. The older woman stood.

"I'll come with you two."

All three of the other women stared, then Shan laughed and slapped Fa's shoulder with enough force to knock the stern woman sideways.

"Time you loosened up, Fa. We'll find you a good time in this city no matter what."

Ming-Wa glared and she and Fa locked eyes briefly. Fa shrugged.

"We are Her hara, Ming-Wa. Her centre. A little party can't change that."

Ming-Wa folded her arms over her chest. With angry eyes she watched her friends walk off into the crowd.


----------



## barsoomcore

And that is the conclusion of "...And Madness Followed"

The ladies have requested yet another go-round -- and I think it's time for a women-in-prison story.

Stay tuned!


----------



## shilsen

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> And that is the conclusion of "...And Madness Followed"




Excellent, as ever!



> The ladies have requested yet another go-round -- and I think it's time for a women-in-prison story.
> 
> Stay tuned!




I'll be waiting.

BTW, I'm curious - is Shan's dialogue artistic license on your part, or is that something the player actually comes up with at the table? Because it's freaking hilarious.


----------



## barsoomcore

Shan is played by Val, the Columbian/French-Canadian girl. She's HIGHlarious. And her accent just makes it all even funnier.

"I say monsters."

"That's what you get with your fancy magic."

"I'm going to give you such ."

"Now it's time for the big girls to go to work."

"You're cute when you're angry."

"Have some lunch waiting for us."

"Time to kill things."

"Village to village, no one to play with..."

"I think that burned my eyebrows right off."

Those are all player-original. And actually Wei-Yong's line about the little moustache was actually Shan's. I thought it was funnier in Wei-Yong's mouth. Most of the Goddess-specific stuff I put in myself.

Val's the one who on her second attack of the first combat ever, grabbed her d20 and said, "Okay, so he's got an AC of what, 16? I'm Power Attacking for five." THAT was when I knew this was actually going to be fun.


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## Animus

Excellent SH, barsoomcore.

I was on your web site and the links to the character sheets are broken. What's the deal with that?


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## barsoomcore

Uh, no idea. I'll get them back up this evening.


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## shilsen

barsoomcore said:
			
		

> Shan is played by Val, the Columbian/French-Canadian girl. She's HIGHlarious. And her accent just makes it all even funnier.




Now you've got me trying to imagine Shan's lines in a French-Canadian accent (I don't think I can imagine a Columbian/French-Canadian accent).



> "I say monsters."
> 
> "That's what you get with your fancy magic."
> 
> "I'm going to give you such ."
> 
> "Now it's time for the big girls to go to work."
> 
> "You're cute when you're angry."
> 
> "Have some lunch waiting for us."
> 
> "Time to kill things."
> 
> "Village to village, no one to play with..."
> 
> "I think that burned my eyebrows right off."




  



> Those are all player-original. And actually Wei-Yong's line about the little moustache was actually Shan's. I thought it was funnier in Wei-Yong's mouth. Most of the Goddess-specific stuff I put in myself.
> 
> Val's the one who on her second attack of the first combat ever, grabbed her d20 and said, "Okay, so he's got an AC of what, 16? I'm Power Attacking for five." THAT was when I knew this was actually going to be fun.




Ah, right! So the whole "gaming with bunch of stewardesses" bit didn't tell you it would be fun? It's gaming with stewardesses who use Power Attack that made it fun.

Sadly, that makes perfect sense to me.


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## barsoomcore

shilsen said:
			
		

> Sadly, that makes perfect sense to me.



Yeah.


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## barsoomcore

Character sheet links re-routed appropriately.


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## BSF

Thanks for the newest episode, it was a delightful read.  And thanks to the ladies for giving you some great stuff to write up.


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## barsoomcore

Thanks! We are running out of time to hold another so it may not happen, but if it does, prepare for a doozy! Kung-Fu Stewardess In Prison!!!


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## Darklone

*pulls up another chair*

Finally caught up reading. Luve it. Greetings to the ladies.


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## barsoomcore

It is sadly starting to look very unlikely that we will see another episode of Wild Stewardess Action in the future. Our moving date is only two weeks away and I'll spending a good portion of that time in Toronto anyway, so sadly we are running out of time. Sorry folks!


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